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Cuddles, Bromace and A Whole Lot Of Politics

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McLeod:

@Gabe, dk if you’ve heard, but but you’ve got competition for hottest NHL captain now 😉

Crosby:

Rude!

Crosby:

😂

Claude:

For once I’m agreeing with Sid, RUDE!

Kaner:

Yeah, rude, CLEARLY, Jon is the hottest captain.

JT:

I fully accept I’m not in the running here 😂

Marns:

Debatable 😉

Stromer:

OBVIOUSLY DAVO IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL CAPTAIN

Drat:

Obviously.

Staalsy:

I’d be offended but I’m not captain anymore so :D

Gabe:

Not according to Skinny

Gabe:

“He’s my captain for life”

Gabe:

(We have the argument about who is the hottest captain in the league regularly)

Staalsy:

That doesn’t make sense

Gabe:

That he thinks you’re better looking than me? You’re right, IT DOESN’T

Staalsy:

Wait, he SAID THAT?

Gabe:

Yeah, hence the argument part. Wouldn’t be an argument if he was agreeing with me

Kaner:

Why am I not surprised that you would vote for yourself as best looking NHL captain

Gabe:

Because I’m the obvious choice?

Staalsy:

But

Staalsy:

But he REALLY SAID THAT?

Gabe:

OMG ERIC YES

Richie:

Ask him. The fuck. Out

Cartsy:

^^ What Rich said. ASK HIM OUT

Staalsy:

Just because he thinks I’m hot doesn’t mean that I should ask him out

Sid:

OMG Eric you are KILLING US ALL

Staalsy:

I don’t want to ruin our friendship

Sid:

Except in the entire history of all of us ever, when has confessing your feelings to your best friend ever gone wrong

Kaner:

It worked for Taze, and Sid, and Cartsy, and literally everyone

Drat:

Worked for me

Staalsy:

That makes it MORE likely that it’s NOT going to work for me

Staalsy:

Like, statistically, it CAN’T work for all of us

Marns:

Define “work”

Marns:

Because JT and I are still pretty solid friends :D

Stromer:

SO YOU HAVE FINALLY ACCEPTED THAT HE HAS A CRUSH ON YOU

Marns:

Yes. Shut up Stromer.

JT:

It’s chill Pickle, we’re being adults about it.

Stromer:

Why does that sound so ominous?

Hartsy:

I HAVE A BURNING QUESTION @SID

Sid:

If you’re experiencing a burning sensation, I’d suggest talking to your captain, I’m sure he’s got more experience in that area than I do

Danny:

RUDE

Hartsy:

NOT WHAT I MEANT SID

Hartsy:

I just really have to know

Hartsy:

WHAT WAS IN NATE’S VIDEO FOR YOUR 1000TH GAME THAT WAS SO PERSONAL THEY COULDN’T SHARE IT

Sid:

Oh.

Hartsy:

Because I’m like, they shared Nate literally writing I <3 SID on camera

Hartsy:

Which, we all know the league ships you two

Hartsy:

So it’s got to have been MORE PERSONAL THAN THAT

Hartsy:

But also @Nate, I’m assuming you knew it was supposed to be broadcast

Hartsy:

So you didn’t go for… SID 1000 GAMES, THAT MEANS I OWE YOU 1000 BLOW JOBS

Nate:

I… did not go for that…

Sid:

Honestly, it was fine

Sid:

I didn’t think it was super personal, just like Nate saying stuff about growing up with me playing in the league and that

Sid:

But according to our media team… “his heart eyes were showing”

Sid:

Which, I don’t know, it’s just Nate’s face

TBeauts:

Can confirm, Nate always has heart eyes on his face whenever you’re around Sid

TBeauts:

I’m not sure you’d know what non-heart eyes Nate looks like

Nate:

Shut up

Nate:

I’m glad they didn’t show it

Nate:

Although I’m mad I don’t get a MacKinnon 87 jersey

Nate:

Because the entire team doing warm ups in your number?

Nate:

That was awesome

Sid:

Don’t. When they started doing their laces at exactly the right time

Sid:

I WAS TEARING UP

Sid:

It was awesome

Kaner:

Me. On the road at dallas for 1000. Thinking about Sid’s 1000. Maybe idk, the league will let me facetime Jonny after the game

Jonny:

I’D HAVE MADE IT SPECIAL IF I COULD BE THERE. I’M SORRY

Kaner:

You make my life special Jon <3

Kaner:

I’m just whining 😉 kids were extra kids today

Brinks:

I believe we’re supposed to refer to them as The Chicago Ice Kittens now

Kaner:

True.

Claude:

Is every team slowly being replaced by cats?

Teeks:

I mean, would that be the worst thing?

Davo:

@Brinks, how’s our boy?

Stromer:

I’m ok?

Stromer:

I can use my phone

Davo:

So you weren’t responding to my texts why?

Stromer:

Sorry :/

Stromer:

Love you <3

Davo:

But you’re ok?

Stromer:

As long as I literally don’t move my head

Stromer:

Which turns out, it’s quite hard to do

Stromer:

Literally EVERYTHING involves moving your head

Sid:

I feel that

Tazer:

Ditto

Davo:

You seemed fine after the hit?

Stromer:

Babes, I WAS fine, and then like, a few days later my head was just NOPE

Brinks:

He’s totally not whiney about it though 😂😂😂

Stromer:

You’re so mean. My head hurts. You’re supposed to give me kisses and make me feel better

Brinks:

YOU WHINE WHEN I GIVE YOU KISSES

Kaner:

Omg is he in the “I want kisses, but also you giving me kisses makes my head hurt” phase

Kaner:

I fucking hated that phase

Tazer:

😠

Tazer:

I feel for you Stromer

Stromer:

Thank you Taze. I appreciate it. :p

Gabe:

@Staalsy, how is our boy skins doing?

Staalsy:

Not good ☹

Staalsy:

I literally don’t know what to do

Staalsy:

Coaches keep scratching him for games, like that’s going to help,

Gabe:

Because Jeff is so incentivised by having his hockey taken away

Gabe:

That will totally mean he plays harder and doesn’t go into a depression spiral about being a waste of space

Gabe:

OH WAIT NO

Gabe:

Give him cuddles from me

Gabe:

Specifically cuddles, not hugs

Gabe:

You’ve gotta get your arms around him for a solid thirty seconds at least

Gabe:

Maybe with some hair stroking in there

Gabe:

And then be all “this is from landy”

Staalsy:

I can definitely do that

Gabe:

Don’t front. You’d LOVE doing that

Staalsy:

I mean, also yes.

Gabe:

DO IT NOW

Staalsy:

We’re on a plane. I’ll do it when we get to the hotel

Chucky:

In the meantime, @Howdy, can I ask what the actual fuck?

Howdy:

Do you mean, what the actual fuck, why is our team falling apart at the seams?

Howdy:

Or what the actual fuck actually happened with bread?

Kaner:

THE SECOND ONE

Kaner:

I realise that wasn’t directed at me

Kaner:

BUT I KNOW MY BOY and he sure as HELL didn’t ever beat up a girl

Howdy:

I know he’d really appreciate you reaching out to him rn Kaner

Howdy:

He’s feeling…

Howdy:

It’s fucked him up. That’s for sure

Chucky:

I’m just not sure I understand, like, there’s the allegations, but then someone said it was political and what?

Howdy:

Ok, I’m not like, the best to explain this, because I don’t understand it myself

Howdy:

So people who know more, chip in if you can

Howdy:

Basically, Russia is “technically” a democracy, but like, also kind of not

Howdy:

And also hockey is some how pretty political?

Sid:

Hockey and politics in Russia have been intertwined for a while

Sid:

During the cold war, hockey was one of the few ways people outside of Russia got to see what was inside Russia

Sid:

So they made the international hockey team like, not only the best it could be, but the most in alignment with the ideals that they like to be known for

Sid:

They want the rest of the world to think Russia is a utopia, so they make the Russian hockey team represent Russia being a utopia

Howdy:

Right! And I think now, that also extends to like, Russian NHLers, they’re SUPPOSED to give off the impression that Russia is perfect and there’s no place better than Russia.

Howdy:

And like, bread LOVES Russia, like he is SO Russian

Howdy:

But whilst he’s not said anything anti-putin, he has apparently publicly said stuff which is pro… the other guy?

Sid:

Navalny

Howdy:

Thanks Sid.

Howdy:

So anyway, he’s not doing the “good little Russian hockey player” act that he’s supposed to do.

Howdy:

And he thought maybe this would only mean he didn’t get picked for worlds or whatever

Howdy:

Which, they’d be fucking stupid to do

Howdy:

But now this guy, who is his old coach, but also somehow works for putin? Or like unofficially works for putin

Sid:

I think the official word is just that he’s very publically “pro-putin” but the way Russian politics work is complicated

Howdy:

Yeah, so he made up that Bread beat up this chick and they all had to cover it up

Howdy:

Which bread swears BLIND he didn’t do

Kaner:

There’s no way Temi beat up ANYONE

Kaner:

He’s worse than me in a fight

Howdy:

But like, it’s not just the fake allegations/jail time, he’s super worried about his fam back home

Kaner:

His grandparents right?

Howdy:

Yeah, them, plus his fiancee’s dad works for the KHL, so like, now HIS job is in danger

Kaner:

Fuck

Howdy:

Exactly

Howdy:

So he’s looking at if he needs to bring them over here/if he CAN bring them over here

Howdy:

And stuff like that

Howdy:

And work is like the last thing on his mind

Howdy:

So obvs the coaches were like, take whatever time you need

Kaner:

Russia is kind of low key scary

Chucky:

No low key about it

Kaner:

I’ve texted him btw, but idek how much of my texts he understands

Howdy:

His English is way better than it was, like way better

Howdy:

But also, I know if he can get away with not speaking English he will 😂

Teeks:

I have a less complicated question

Teeks:

For @Chucky

Chucky:

Shoot?

Teeks:

Brady’s straight right?

Teeks:

And no, I’m not hitting on him

Chucky:

Yep. (and good? That would be weird? And definitely a downgrade for you)

Teeks:

OK, follow up question

Teeks:

How the fuck does your STRAIGHT LITTLE BROTHER get a BOYFRIEND before you do?

Stromer:

BURN

Chucky:

OUCH

Chucky:

But also. So very fucking true.

Chucky:

Jimmy is adorbs though

Chucky:

He always comes over and says hi when Brades and I facetime

Cale:

I’m pretty sure the Sens media are shipping them

Cale:

Given the comment of “meeting the in laws”

Seguin:

I’d like to see straight-twitter misinterpret THAT

Latts:

But if Brady’s straight, it IS just a bromance right?

Chucky:

I mean…

Chucky:

Brady is straight

Chucky:

But also, he was like, “I can see how you could think about dating a guy though, Jimmy’s great.”

Chucky:

🤦♂️

Wilso:

That’s how it starts

Wilso:

You’re in full on “I love my bro, he’s the best, if he was a chick I’d date him”

Latts:

Next thing you know you’re madly in love with each other

Chucky:

… I’ll be sure to tell Brades 😉

Marns:

Wait, WHY IS HE JIMMY? I THOUGHT HIS NAME WAS TIM?

Josty:

Jimothy? Timothy? IS THERE EVEN A DIFFERENCE?

Chucky:

Brades just started calling him Jimmy to be a dick

Chucky:

It’s stuck 🤷♂️

Davo:

I hope everyone has watched our boy Bayne’s interview

Davo:

https://www.sportsnet.ca/nhl/video/nhl-agent-bayne-pettinger-paving-path-lgbtq-members-hockey/

Sid:

I did, it’s super encouraging just to know that, even not coming out, people knowing that I’m ok with queer people, helps

Davo:

He’s pretty confident that the next step is us though

Matts:

TEAM LETS ALL COME OUT TOGETHER

Nate:

Yeah, no.

Matts:

You’re not ON team lets all come out together

Nate:

Good.

Davo:

That wasn’t me saying we SHOULD

Davo:

Or Matts saying we should

Matts:

But we agreed we’d do it together

Matts:

And we WERE going to do it

Matts:

But the world falling apart kind of makes it tricky

Sid:

Ok, but going back to the Russia thing, ever think about how tricky it could make life for your Russian teammates if you come out?

Howdy:

Shit. No… I hadn’t even…

Sid:

They can’t do YCP vids

Sid:

They wouldn’t be able to speak up to say they’d be OK with you playing

Sid:

We don’t even know if they could get away with not saying anything

Davo:

I’m not sure we should let that be a reason to not live our own truths though

Sid:

I’m not saying you should, and if you kids want to, that’s up to you

Sid:

But you’ve got to also respect why some of us don’t want to

Davo:

I don’t think anyone’s judging anyone for wanting to come out or not wanting to come out

TBeauts:

I think that’s even the case for Petty

TBeauts:

Like, he thinks it’s the right time for SOMEONE to come out

TBeauts:

But you know he loves us all, and he gets why it’s difficult

TBeauts:

Like, more than ANYONE he gets why it’s difficult

Gabe:

Changing the topic, because this feels fraught

Gabe:

@Staalsy did you give skins my cuddle?

Staalsy:

Yes

Gabe:

????

Staalsy:

It was weird. Like the cuddle was good, but then I told him it was from you and he got all weird about it

Cartsy:

OMG YOU ARE SO DENSE STAALSY, IT’S BECAUSE HE WANTED IT TO BE FROM YOU?

Staalsy:

Do we think?

Gabe:

Yes

Cartsy:

Yes

Danny:

Yes

Sid:

YES!

Staalsy:

Ugh, fine, I’ll go and give him another cuddle.

Gabe:

Report back!

Staalsy:

He was all “is this from Gabe?” and I said no.

Staalsy:

And now I need to go and sit down because of the smile he gave me

Staalsy:

So thanks for that.

Gabe:

HE WANTS YOU

Staalsy:

As a friend.

Gabe:

🙄

Lu:

@TBeauts, fair warning, your boy Benny is trending on twitter, and not for good reasons

Segsy:

???????

Lu:

He insta liked a pretty fucking transphobic post by candace owens

TBeauts:

I know. I’ve been trying to call him for the past half hour but I think his phone is off

Lu:

I just thought you might appreciate knowing about it, I know you guys are tight

TBeauts:

Yeah, like we were kids together, but honestly, I’m so fucking angry with him

TBeauts:

He’s been skirting the line of stuff that really isn’t ok to say

TBeauts:

And the rest of his family is NOT like that

TBeauts:

I don’t know where it’s coming from

Seguin:

Ok, but maybe, has anyone considered that maybe he liked it by accident?

Lu:

He could have done, but candace owens is pretty fucking transphobic to start with

Lu:

And he’s got to have been following her to have seen her post presumably?

Lu:

And this isn’t the first slightly controversial opinion he’s shown

Segsy:

Yes, but it’s Jamie, and no offense, but I know him slightly better than the rest of you

Sid:

I get that Tyler, but you do also slightly have some rose tinted goggles on there

Segsy:

??

Sid:

Just, when it comes to Jamie, you LIKE him, and that’s going to skew your perception of him

Segsy:

Look, sometimes he’s an idiot, and maybe he didn’t understand the post?

Chucky:

Then why would he even be liking it? I don’t go round liking stuff I don’t understand

Teeks:

This is why social media sucks ass

Sid:

I don’t like agreeing with TK

Sid:

But I absolutely agree here

Chucky:

Idk. It’s not hard if you’re not a racist transphobe

Segsy:

HE ISN’T

Danny:

Lets just drop it guys

Danny:

I feel like this isn’t going to go anywhere productive. Maybe Benn did something bad, maybe he didn’t. Without talking to him, no-one is going to know.

TBeauts:

I just got off the phone with him

TBeauts:

And he’s unliked it, which is… good?

TBeauts:

But he went on a massive rant about how he should be able to believe whatever he wants

TBeauts:

🤦♂️

Segsy:

Cartsy:

Does anyone else feel like we’re in that horrible bit in the middle of the season where everything just feels like a fucking grind?

Claude:

YES.

Cartsy:

Like, I could do with a bye-week round about now

TBeauts:

I could do with a bi-week right now 😉

Chucky:

😂

Davo:

This season is fucking tough guys

Davo:

Like, remember to be kind to yourselves

Chucky:

Or each other 😉

Teeks:

@McLeod how’s your boy Neeks?

McLeod:

I miss him

McLeod:

Which is stupid and all. But whatever. I do.

McLeod:

And I want to text him, and be all, trying to keep his spirits up

McLeod:

But I know he finds texting hard in English.

Gabe:

Slacker. :P

Lu:

Seconded 😉

TBeauts:

I swear you Swedish boys are unnaturally good at English though

TBeauts:

ALSO GABE WHY ARE YOU ON THE GROUP CHAT?

Gabe:

Shhh, she’s only in early stages, we’re all good 😉 In the hospital, just kind of waiting for the main event to kick off

Claude:

It’s today?

Gabe:

It’s today 😉

Gabe:

But going back to McLeod – could you call him?

McLeod:

Idk, that feels, like weirdly personal.

Teeks:

He’s your FRIEND

Teeks:

Also like, if this wasn’t the covid season of doom, you’d be round at his place to cheer him up

Teeks:

So you can call him as a substitute to that

McLeod:

Maybe. I’ll think about it.

Teeks:

Call him u fcknucul, NP

Teeks:

That was Patty btw. Who HAS been calling Nico, who is apparently very grateful for phone calls right now.

McLeod:

Oh.

McLeod:

Ok. Ok I’ll call him.

Gabe:

Guys…

Gabe:

https://www.instagram.com/p/CMDATkvAHQk/

TBeauts:

LANDESBABY

EJ:

HE’S SO HANDSOME

EJ:

AND SO IS THE BABY 😂😂😂😂

Gabe:

And this is why Paul gets to be godfather, not you

EJ:

WHAT? HE GOT TO BE GODFATHER LAST TIME!!!!

Gabe:

We’re keeping the godparents the same.

TBeauts:

BOOM. Uncle Tys coming in clutch AGAIN :D

TBeauts:

Does my beautiful Godson have a name?

Gabe:

Lucas Landeskog

Josty:

😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

Cale:

ANOTHER LL, I LOVE IT

Cale:

And he is amazing and so cute, and I wish this wasn’t covid season of doom because I want to snuggle him so badly

Hartsy:

He is SUPER cute Gabe congrats :D

Sid:

He’s GORGEOUS, can’t wait to meet him!

Lu:

😍

Lu:

Edddddiiiiiiieeeeeeee

Lack:

OH MY GOD BOBBY

Lu:

I want a baby eddie

Lack:

I know gorgeous

Lu:

Let me put a baby in you eddie

Teeks:

Every damn time. It isn’t going to work.

Lu:

WE DON’T KNOW THAT UNTIL WE TRY

Cale:

I mean…

Cale:

Hartsy and I could always try as well…. For science 😳😳😳😳

EJ:

DENIED

Cale:

BUT…. BUT…. BABIES

EJ:

I’M NOT READY TO BE A GRANDFATHER!!!!