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Bobbseys, What Did You Sign Me Up For?

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A month had already passed by since Andrea had left Miranda in Paris. To her surprise, the Editor-in-Chief had written her a recommendation letter, so it was no problem for her to find a new job. She was now starting her career as a journalist at The Mirror, although since she was a newbie, the only task her new Boss gave her was writing short columns about boring things. And that was when she was not in charge of writing obituaries; those days she felt like throwing herself out of a window. Who would write her obituary then? She did not really care. And because she was not feeling fulfilled by this job at the moment, her thoughts would always go back to the one person she had ever had feelings for: Miranda.

Before going to Paris, she had had a big argument with Nate. He kept saying how much she had changed, and how obsessed she was about Miranda, that she always picked the phone when she received a call from her, but did not pay nearly the same attention to him.

[ Flashback to the morning before Paris Fashion Week - Andy's apartment ]

"She's my Boss! What do you want, for me to get fired?"

"Well, actually yes, that would make you a big favor! Look at yourself! This isn't you anymore, Andy. This person you have become? I don't recognize her."

"Now you're just talking like Lily. You know what? You're right."

"Finally, we agree to someth…"

"No, you listen to me because I'm only gonna say this once! I am different from who I used to be, not because I have changed, but because… because I have finally let myself be the person I always was in the first place."

"What the hell are you talking about? Working for that bitch has made you crazy!"

"Don't you fucking dare call Miranda that in my presence!"

"See? You're always defending her like… like you were her girlfriend or something. It's ridiculous!"

"What is ridiculous is to have forced myself to live a life that makes me miserable just to keep you, Lily and Doug, and especially my parents, happy."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm a lesbian, Nate."

Nate scoffed, "You definitely have lost your damn mind."

"It's over, Nate. You'll find a girl who feels the same way about you that you feel about her."

"But… but you love me! Come on, Andy, I'm sorry I insulted your superior, if it's about that, but…"

"It's not! Are you even listening? I grew up in a conservative family. I couldn't come out to them! I told myself I wasn't "like that" like my parents call gay people, that if I finally dated a boy, I would like it. But if I learned something during the time I've been working for Mi… 'Runway', it's… I am a lesbian. And I've always been! All the hints were there, I've just been ignoring them all my life. Do you know how hard this is for me?"

"For YOU? How about, for fucking ONCE, you care about ME? Do you know what it is like to know I've wasted the last year dating someone who suddenly has turned into a lesbian? Is this what Miranda does at Runway, huh? Her hobby is turning girls gay for her because she's so egocentric and her life is empty, like her head?"

Andy was trying not to cry, but she was feeling completely helpless, and could not stop the tears from falling down. She knew she could not have this talk with her family, but thought maybe Nate, being from a younger generation, like her, would understand. She would talk to Lily and Doug later, but was convinced they would not take it well. Well, maybe Doug would, since he is gay, but Lily…

"People don't just turn gay, Nate! That's what ignorant people say! We are born the way we are, but unfortunately for me, I've discovered who I really am now! And I'm not gonna hide it anymore, whether you like it or not."

"You weren't doing a good job at hiding it either. Go to your dear Miranda, kiss her ass or whatever you two do."

Andy slapped his face with more strength than she expected. She had never reacted this strongly towards anyone before. "How could I have chosen to date this selfish jerk in the first place?" She grabbed the suitcase that was next to her, which she had prepared last night, since she had to go early this morning to the airport for Paris Fashion Week.

Nate just stood there, petrified, still trying to process what had just happened, and heard Andy slam the front door. "Fuck that bitch! I'm better off without her." he thought, and decided he would leave the apartment for good, maybe head to Boston to become a Chef, so when Andy came back from her stupid trip with her bitch of a Boss, she would regret having said and done this to him.

[ End of flashback ]

Andy sighed. But then she remembered, it's Friday and I'm gonna see Nigel, Emily and Doug after work. 2 more hours and I'll be free.

[ Flashback to the morning before Paris Fashion Week - Airport ]

It had been a relief telling Doug what had happened with Nate when she was waiting for her flight at the airport last month. She had sent both him and Lily a short message. Lily was the first one to reply:

How could you do this to Nate? You used him! You chose to be a snob and to sleep with your Boss to advance in your career. How can you be so pathetic? He's better off without you, and so am I. Don't contact me ever again.

She tried very hard to not cry at the airport, since she was surrounded by people and had to find Miranda, who would not appreciate her being a mess who looked like a raccoon. She should not have used mascara that morning. One minute later, she received not a message, but a phone call, which she took with trembling hands:


"Andy? Oh my God, you're gay!"

"No shit, Sherlock." she joked, but her sniffing betrayed her.

"Hey, are you okay? Tell me Nate didn't do anything stupid."

"Well, apart from saying I have decided to turn into a lesbian because I'm selfish and calling Miranda horrible things, no, he didn't."

"You should've told him being gay isn't a choice, but being an idiot is. Girl, I'm so sorry you had to stand that crap. But now the good thing is… we're a gay duo! We are Queens, you and me. We have to catch up, I'm sure there's a lot you would like to talk about, am I right?"

It took Andy a few seconds to react. She wasn't expecting anyone to be supportive because of her past (and present) experiences, and even though Doug was gay, a part of her was afraid he would pick sides, like Lily just did, "thank you, Doug. You don't know how much this means to me."

"Don't even mention it. And by the way, you're going to the City of Love, so, honey, you know what this means?"

"Doug, don't be ridiculous!"

"Aww, now you're just talking like her! Isn't that adorable?"

"You're impossible." she smiled.

"Well, have fun and remember: don't disappoint your Queen. Or she'll end you and there will be no gay duo no more when Paris Fashion Week is over."

"You know I would never disappoint her on purpose. Anyway, I gotta go, I can't be late to my flight and… oh, there she is. And Emily is making faces at me, she's so pissed off. Love you, Douggie!"

"Love you too, au-revoir!"

[ End of flashback ]

Those 2 hours were over, finally! Andy grabbed her messenger bag and left the building as quickly as she could, wishing a nice weekend to her peers on her way out. She headed towards the Elias-Clark building, since Nigel and Emily would be waiting for her outside, as usual. Doug would join them at their favorite bar.

"Hi, Six! Looking good as always."

"Hi yourself, Nigel, and thanks."

"Can you stop your stupid small talking? I'm starving, and God knows I need a tapa right now."

"Em, ever since you stopped being stubborn about not eating properly, you're insufferable about going out to eat. I just arrived here!"

"So arrive earlier!"

"Girls, please. Behave yourselves; we have a reputation to keep." Nigel said, clearing his throat.

"Wha...? Oh." Andy did not realize she had stopped breathing as she saw her ex-Boss heading towards her limousine.

Miranda did not seem to have noticed they were there. But of course, this was New York and there were a lot of pedestrians walking by all the time.

"Earth calling Six: we have an emergency, Emily will either have her tapa or your head for lunch."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I… zoomed out for a moment. Let's go!" she started walking, followed by her two friends, who looked at each other in understanding.

Later, at their spot…

"There you are! I have ordered the usual. I was starving." Doug said once they all were sat at the table."

"See? This man gets me!" Emily exclaimed, starting to eat, even moaning at her first bite.

"Do yourself a favor and save that for whenever Serena is around." Nigel said, taking a sip of his drink.

Emily choked on her food, "What… what do you mean?"

Andy intervened, "Em, let's just say you're not very discreet about your feelings for Serena."

"What feelings? We're friends!"

"And whose fault is that?" Nigel asked, teasing her.

"She can't possibly be interested in me in that way! And I'm not gonna break our friendship over this!"

"So you admit you have a crush on her." Doug said, satisfied with Emily's reaction, whose face had turned the same color as her hair.

"Oh, fuck off!"

"Now, enough about Emily. Six, we have some news for you. She and I have decided to help you out, and I'm sure Dough will like it too."

"Uuh, color me intrigued." Doug said, eating a fry.

"Uh-oh, what are you two up to?" Andy asked, fearing the worst.

Nigel cleared his throat, "so, remember you said you can't forget about Miranda?"


"Well, you should."

"I… I can't, I tried, but…"

"So we thought of a solution."

"Bloody Hell, can't you just go straight to the point?" Emily said, "we created a profile for you on a dating site, so you can get over the bloody Ice Queen."

"NO! No-no-no-no-no, you've got to be kidding me. That's for desperate people!"

"Do you want to look at yourself in the mirror I always bring in my purse?" Emily rolled her eyes.


"Desperate times call for desperate measures. And also, you know what they say: one devil drives out another." Nigel said.

"You think you're so funny!"

"Andy, what do you have to lose?" Doug tried to encourage her, not only because he wanted to see her friend happy, and finally dating the right person, but also because he was curious about this site and the anecdotes Andy would no doubt tell them.

"I guess I could give it a chance, see what happens."

"That's the spirit!" her three friends said in unison, and had a toast "to finding love!"

Meanwhile, at Miranda's townhouse…

Miranda was officially divorced from Stephen. Of all the mistakes she had made, he was by far the worst of them all. But at least this was over. What was not over though, was her feelings for her ex-assistant. Not the first assistant, of course, but the clumsy, awkward one who had gone through a metamorphosis in the blink of an eye. She could never recover from the fact the brunette had decided to abandon her in Paris, after having let herself been vulnerable in front of her about her divorce, after having told her how much of herself she saw in her, which was the biggest compliment she had ever paid to anyone. After all of this, she had left her in front of the paparazzi. She had been so stupid, thinking… what? That she would be different? What exactly was she expecting to happen? Andrea was just an assistant, the best one so far, very efficient, always knowing what she needed before even she knew it. She had almost completely stopped eating, except when she was having dinner with her daughters, to set a good example for them. She was barely getting any sleep, which had had a negative influence on her mood, so her employees were a wreck of nerves, even more than usual. At least Emily had been competent and found a decent replacement for Andrea.

Caroline and Cassidy had thought her mother was depressed because of the divorce, since they were living for the second time the backlash from the press. Those idiots from Page Six really enjoyed coming after her mother, they hated them so much. But they took after Miranda, after all, and so they were very smart. It did not take long for them to notice that the real reason why her mother was so sad and seemed to not even be alive was the departure of the Potter girl, as they had decided to call her. How could she abandon their mother? Who did she think she was?

"Alright, Cas, we just have to click here and boom! Mom will have new suitors in no time!"

"I hope this works."

"Me too."

The girls were so immersed on their task, they did not hear Miranda had just come home from work.

Their mother walked towards them, "I said, Bobbseys, I'm home. What are you two doing on my computer?!"


"We had to do a research for an essay on… on magazines."

"And we chose fashion. So we wanted to take a look at your PDFs."

Miranda did not seem convinced by their explanation, and so she decided to check her laptop. Caroline hit on the last box she needed to check to complete the registration, without looking twice, since her mother was about to catch them, and both she and her sister ran upstairs.

"Pheww, that was close." Cassidy said, "Did you send the form?"

"Yes, it's all done. Good thing she didn't notice…"

"Caroline, Cassidy, come here right now!"


"Well, she had to find out what we did sooner or later."

The twins met her mother in less than a minute to prevent a bigger disaster than the one that was coming.

"Will you care to explain what is this screen and why does it say here CaputDraconis?"

"It's such a funny story!"

"You're so gonna laugh about it!"

She did not.

The twins explained their plan to her, and Miranda pinched her nose, trying to process it. This had to be a nightmare. She could not be registered on a dating site! She was the Ice Queen, not the Ice Bachelorette, for crying out loud!

"Go to your rooms. I'll think about your punishment in the morning."

"Yes, mom." they said in unison, slowly heading to their rooms. They were so disappointed in their plan being a failure when it had barely started...

The silver-haired woman went back to the site, deciding to delete her profile, but truth be told, she was a bit curious. She checked what kind of people was registered. There was no harm in that, right?

"Let's see. I'm a sugar… disgusting. Oh, this one seems normal "I'm a surgeon and I love dogs. Searching for a young… eww! Eww! How can men be so gross? I've had enough!" she was about to go to her profile to delete it, when a picture called her attention. It was not a man's, but a woman's picture. Why did a woman appear in the screen instead of just men? "Oh. It seems I gave such a scare to my daughters they hit on the bisexual box. But I must be dreaming, this… it can't be… her."

She was looking at the pic of no other but Andrea Sachs, whose nickname was ChanelBoots.

"Kinky much? What are you doing here? Does this mean her story with the chef wannabe is over?" She could not stop herself from reading her profile.

Hi! I'm searching for a woman who likes to have fun, but who is also intellectual, so we can have dates at coffee shops and have meaningful conversations. I'm nice, funny, a bit of a geek, and work as a journalist, and as such, I'm curious about different topics, so don't hesitate to contact me if you're not boring ;P

"Andrea, you were always a box of surprises." Miranda said to herself, deciding to not delete her profile and to pursue her ex-assistant. She did not know how, but she would try, as she was never a coward and always did whatever was necessary to get what she wanted, which, in this case, was her Andrea's heart.