Fatima’s Clinic (1.1) - Jane’s Perspective
As Fatima walked away Jane’s emotions overwhelmed her and she collapsed on Sabina's bed.
"What are you doing?''
It was the most beautiful croak Jane had ever heard. She threw herself on top of the newly conscious Sabina with perhaps too much reckless abandon. "Ow...''
Jane jumped back "Sorry."
"Why are you crying?" There was no ridicule in her voice, just confusion. But Jane was too shocked to register that at the time.
“I'm not!" She said defensively, swiping her eyes.
"Well... Well, you are," The bedridden angel refuted. “That's what this-” she haphazardly waved at her own face by way of explanation.
"Ok, I'm crying." She admitted in embarrassment, but Sabina didn’t scoff at her emotions. She did something that was far worse... She was surprised at them.
“But I didn't think you cared about me.''
Jane's breath caught in her throat. “Why? Because... you don't think I have any feelings." It wasn't a question. In that split second all her traumatic memories flooded her. She saw the few men she had loved leaving, accusing her of being too cold and distant, and too obsessed with her work. If they could feel her overwhelming pain at all the many losses she had experienced throughout her life, they wouldn't think so.
But Sabina's answer was the last thing she expected. "No, because I can be annoying.”
That sentence would come back to haunt Jane in the future. But at that moment the relief and euphoria of knowing that Sabina, the most beautifully passionate and fiery woman she had ever met, didn’t think her a heartless bitch overwhelmed her and she laughed through her tears. "You can be so annoying!"
“I don't try to be." Sabina seemed desperate to explain. "I don't have the filter thing that others- I don't know."
Jane took Sabina's hand laughing, and eventually Sabina joined in her mirth.
A load lifted from her shoulders. Sabina would be ok. Saint was on his way. This had been the worst week of her life. But in some ways, it had also been the best.
Brok's Party (2) - Jane's Perspective
They were at Brok’s party, preparing to rescue Elena. They had just stolen the office key from Brok’s jacket while dancing, slipping into a photo booth for some semblance of privacy. The camera flashed at regular intervals as they crawled over each other, arming up. By design there wasn't much room to encourage intimacy in those getting their photo taken.
"Ready?" Jane asked.
"Almost," Sabina said, then without warning leaned in and kissed the taller angel. Jane was too stunned to pull away. The booth flashed a final time, and Sabina pulled back, eyes wide.
"What was that?" Jane asked breathlessly. It was loud in Brok's party, so Sabine leaned in close to Jane's ear so she could hear.
"That was a thank you." Her voice was husky. “You saved my life. Twice. You're a good friend." Sabina leaned back and gave her a blazing smile.
Jane, far from understanding, was even more flustered. "Do you normally thank your friends that way?"
Sabina was moving towards the exit, but gave Jane a once over that made her feel exposed. "I do when they are as gorgeous as you." She winked. "Now come on. It's time to bring the love."
Telling herself she'd have to figure this out later, Jane followed Sabina out into the party. She hesitated for a moment though then grabbed the pictures from the printer.
Confessions (3.1) - Jane's Perspective OC
Sabina remained an enigma to Jane. She had stolen kisses from her several times now. Sometimes her hand lingered on Jane's leg, or she sat or leaned close to Jane though there was plenty of room elsewhere. It always left Jane wanting more. But somehow she didn’t know how to take it there. If Sabina was fire then Jane was ice. Sabina did everything at full-throttle and Jane blamed herself for not being able to keep up or reciprocate. By the time she could get her mind to stop racing and kiss or touch Sabina back. The blonde angel had already moved on in her customary whirlwind pace, probably assuming that Jane wasn't interested.
And then there were moments Jane was convinced Sabina didn't feel any differently towards her than anyone else. She'd seen Sabina rub Elena’s shoulders or kiss Bosley’s cheek, and jealousy burned in her. But how could she be angry? Sabina was the most free person she had ever met. She could never belong to anyone. Least of all Jane. So she tried to let go of the feelings. But then Sabina would make out with her during the high of a mission or after, each time pushing a little further. The last time Sabina had run her hand up Jane's leg, pushing her skirt all the way up, before disappearing in a breathless blur.
All Jane knew was that she couldn't keep playing this game. She had to know Sabina's intention. She told herself she would ask Sabina after they had had time to recover from the mission. Now that she had a plan she felt confident in being able to confront her.
After the mission, Jane took a long hot shower. This was ridiculous. She had just disarmed a bomb with nerves and hands of steel. Yet the thought of confronting Sabina had her hands shaking and her heart pounding.
She walked around the Berlin outpost with purpose, but couldn't find anyone. Finally she stopped by Saint's office. "Yes my dear? Are you well?" The Saint asked, his ever discerning eyes on her.
"Have you seen Sabina?" She asked shortly. Saint stood up. "I believe she is in Elena's room. She said she wanted to show her something.
Jane couldn't keep her jaw from clenching, but of course Saint noticed. "Jane, are you well? I am always here to talk."
Jane held up a hand, smiling thinly. "Thank you, Saint, but no. Talk is the last thing I need. With you, anyways." She turned away, feeling Saint's disapproval following her out the door. But she couldn't stop to talk to him. The nervous flutter in her chest had transformed into a ball of cold jealous anger. She quickly moved towards the corridor where Elena’s room was. She turned down the hall.
As if on cue, Sabina came tumbling out of Elena’s bedroom, laughing. Her face was flushed and skin gleamed with sweat. "That was beautiful, rookie." She bent into a low bow that would have been ridiculous looking on anyone but his free soul. “Until next time, my lady." she said.
Jane stopped in her tracks. She couldn’t hear Elena's reply, but did hear the laughter before she closed the door. Sabina spun, dancing to her own personal song as always. Despite the cold rage building in her she couldn't help but to admire the short (compared to her) Angel’s grace and agility.
Jane couldn't bear the jealousy anymore. She spun on her heel to flee, but then heard that beautiful voice— feminine but deep.
She turned back around and her heart almost stopped at the joy in Sabina's eyes. Almost.
Sabina faltered, confusion clouding her face. "Jane, what's wrong?"
Jane was boiling over with emotion. A new sensation to her, and she couldn’t control them. "What's wrong? Better question, what's wrong with you?'" She felt a vindictive pleasure at the look of hurt and confusion that briefly flashed across Sabina’s face before being replaced with her customary bravado.
"That's a long conversation. Would you like the general big picture, chronological, or largest to smallest problem?” In her customary way she was very expressive with her body language, miming each option.
Jane scoffed. "How about your twisted sense of selfishness that makes you think it's ok to use the people around you like toys?"
This time Sabine didn't seem able to hide her hurt. She also seemed at a loss for words, which was shocking in and of itself. "What? I-what do you-"
Jane took an aggressive step forward. Sabina shrunk back. Jane had never seen Sabina even remotely scared before. It gave her the power to keep going.
"Oh come on Sabina. The victim act is a bit far-fetched for you. Tell me, does Elena know you're just toying with her? I'm guessing not. She doesn't strike me as the type who likes meaningless sex."
"No, you don't understand." Sabina stuttered. She reached out to grab Jane's shoulder, but Jane brutally blocked it as though it were a strike.
"Don't touch me." she hissed, then kicked out. Sabina's arms came up to block from any damage, but she still stumbled backwards with the impact, falling to her knees.
Jane meant to leave her there. But she saw the glistening of tears in Sabina's green eyes. Sometimes she wished she was as heartless as everyone thought she was.
Sabina doesn't think that you’re heartless . A small voice in her mind said unbidden.
She had hesitated long enough that Sabina had caught her breath. "Jane, there is only you. It has only ever been you. Since that night in Fatima's Clinic."
Jane didn't dare believe it. She waved toward the third Angel's door. “And Elena- "
"We were just sparring." Her voice was pleading to be believed. "She wanted to learn that takedown I did tonight.'' Jane tried to turn around again. But Sabina reached out to her. ”Please! Please don't go. I'm yours. I've been yours since the night you saved me."
Jane paused, but asked quietly, "If that’s true then why have you been playing with me ever since? A kiss here, a touch there. Enough to make me want more. But then you were gone."
Sabine climbed to her feet “I was terrified.” She whispered. She slowly reached out to take Jane's hand, and Jane let her.
"That you would tell me to stop. That you would send me away. I knew I should have just been satisfied to be close to you. But on missions, or right after, it's like a high. I can't stop my impulses sometimes. Jane, I'll do whatever you tell me. I belong to you."
The angel couldn't believe what she was hearing. Even before her anger she hadn't dared hope for such an outright admission. "Prove It.'' It was almost a whisper.
Before she could reconsider, Sabina was in her arms and running her hand through her hair. Their lips were locked and Sabina's body was pressed against hers; there was a desperate need in Sabina’s kiss that moved her.
"Stop, stop." Jane murmured into Sabina's mouth. The blonde froze immediately and pulled away panting.
"Please don't send me away," she all but begged, and it tore at Jane’s heart. Sabina wrung her hands and shuffled as though she was holding herself back from throwing her herself at Jane once more.
Jane was turned on more than she ever had been with any man. Seeing Sabina's need and desperation that she had caused with just one word was empowering. "My room,” she ordered.
A note about the numbers next to the scenes: There are scene, perspective, and time period jumps (mostly in the beginning). I couldn't post or write this story completely chronologically because there are certain aspects of Sabina or Jane's psyche that needed to be revealed in a later scene before a prior scene could be fully understood in their perspective. It is posted in the order it should be read from the greatest understanding and emotional impact.
There are 9 distinct scenes and two flashbacks (The scenes are different from the Chapters, which just felt like a good place to end each section). So if it says 7.3, it's scene 7, but the 3rd time we've come back to it, adding a different perspective or pushing it forward.
Hopefully it's not too confusing.
Chapter 2: Chapter II - Demons (6.1)
A first glimpse into Sabina's Demons.
I know this chapter is short, but it is a lynchpin for so much, and I thought it should be set apart by itself, so it doesn't get lost.
(The jump from 3.1 in the last chapter to 6.1 here is not an accident. It is the intended reading order.)
Demons (6.1) - Jane's Perspective OC
The next months were beautiful. Jane had never felt so understood. She had never explored the idea of dating women, though she had always found them beautiful. But she realized she had fallen for Sabina the same moment Sabina had for her—That night in Fatima's Clinic. Sabina had seen her as no one else had-A human being with keen emotions. But she still didn't understand Sabina's devotion to her. Jane was loving every moment with her new angel. But Sabina acted as though she could never be with anyone else ever again. When she pushed Sabina to explain she would only laugh and say she owed a debt to Jane for saving her life. But wasn't there something any angel would do for another? But no amount of prying could get anything more out of Sabina, even though behind closed doors she could get almost anything from the angel, even iron self control, which Jane loved to push. Sabina's natural instinct was to dominate in everything, including sex. Yet for some reason she had bound herself to Jane's every whim, which they both found incredibly hot. Jane enjoyed telling Sabina where and when to touch, kiss, or even come.
Outside of the bedroom, however, Sabina was unapologetically herself. Impulsive, flirty, and bold… Which was why they were in this argument. Sabina had gone off plan. Again. And had not shut up since.
"Why? WHY Sabina? How hard is it to stick to your orders?" She shouted
"Oh come on," she rolled her eyes. "It was a half-assed plan as it was. You have to admit that a dead sniper and a knocked out guard is a way more fun outcome! Also, I wanted to get you something nice,” Sabine said with a grin and a wink, motioning towards the gun slung on Jane’s shoulder.
Sabina seemed to refuse to take anything seriously right now. Jane had noticed the manic demeanor Sabina got after missions. It was like a drug to her.
"It was supposed to be a stealth mission." Jane snapped. “But now Bosley is out there running damage control and constructing back stories because you can't possibly bear to stay out of sight. What’s worse is you don't even care! You don't care that you’ve doubled Bosley's work or that when you acted without orders you left me out to dry!”
Sabina rolled her eyes. "Left you out to dry? Are you an angel or not? There was nothing that happened even remotely outside of your wheelhouse.” Sabina was pacing around, gesturing. “Besides,” She looked back over her shoulder at Jane, “Besides, the plan was shot as soon as we lost comm connection, in case you hadn’t realized.” Jane looked out the window.
That surprised her. She hadn’t realized. But it didn’t change her fury and annoyance at Sabina deciding to take things into her own hands. Again. “Is that what happened? I thought you have finally learned how to shut up.”
Sabina’s pacing stopped and she turned back towards Jane. “No, I’m afraid you have to shove me off a roof to achieve that trick.”
"That? Again?!" Jane was absolutely incredulous. "Why? Why is it impossible for you to let that go? God, you're so annoying!"
Sabina had already been formulating a response, but stopped in her tracks as if slapped.
"Oh, now you finally shut up? Good. Because I have more important things to do right now.'' She spun on her heel and stalked away, leaving Sabina in the hall.
But even after a shower and struggling through paperwork, she still couldn't get the stricken image of Sabina's face from her mind. She had wanted to get through to her partner. Why did she feel so guilty then?
Finally she threw her pen down in frustration. She'd go find Sabina and talk to her calmly. Maybe Sabina would have settled down enough To have a conversation. Except when she got To Sabina's room, there was no sign of her. Or anywhere in the safehouse. If was definitely against protocol. With Bosley still out in the field technically the mission wasn't finished yet.
Jane checked The security footage and saw that Sabina had left the outpost over an hour ago. She rewinded the film back to their argument, trying to figure out what would make Sabina break orders and leave as she had. She saw herself walk away and hit play. What she hadn’t seen over an hour ago as she had stormed away was Sabina wrapping her arms around herself as though she had been struck and sinking down to the floor, leaning against the wall. Jane winced as Sabina slammed her head against the wall. She stayed there for a good 10 minutes before standing up, pushing her short-blonde hair back. Jane followed her on the cameras until Sabina entered the bathroom. Jane hit fast forward, waiting for Sabina to re-emerge. When she finally did, Sabina’s posture no longer had the lost and dazed look. She strode confidently down the hall, to the garage.
Jane felt like she still had no answers. She rewinded the video back to the argument, switching to a different camera this time, one where she could see her own face. To be honest, she couldn’t even remember what the two of them had said in their anger. There was no sound but she read her own lips.
That? Again?! Why is it so hard for you to get over that? God you are so annoying.
Jane and Sabina had argued many times. Nothing Jane had ever thrown at Sabina seemed to make even the slightest dent. Yet this is what undid her? Calling her annoying? Sabina herself admitted how annoying she was. Surely she had been told told it countless times.
Then it hit her.
Sabina had been told she was annoying her entire life. She had known Sabina had history of abandonment issues and destructive behavior. How could Jane have been so blind and careless?
So this chapter was born from several details and hang-ups applied to Sabina in the movie. Did you spot them? Just a few glimpses for now, but there is more coming! A lot hinges on this Scene, but there are going to be some timeline cutbacks before we see and can understand what is going on in Sabina's mind.
Chapter 3: Chapter III - Fatima's Clinic (1.2) and Confessions (3.1)
Cutback to Sabina's Perspective from the Ch I scenes.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Fatima's Clinic (1.2) - Sabina's Perspective
Sabina slowly came into consciousness in a state of confusion. Not at how much her body hurt. That was more normal than not hurting, really. What confused her was that someone was holding her hand and crying. What confused her even more, when she finally had the strength to open her eyes, was that the person was Jane, of all people. The angel who had shoved her off a roof when she wouldn’t shut up.
“What are you doing?" And Then Jane was... hugging?... her. Which was even more confusing. And more painful. “Ow.”
Jane sat up "Sorry! Sorry."
Sabina couldn't think of anything to say, So the question just sort of came out. “Why are you crying?”
Jane hastily swiped the tears from her face. “'I'm not crying.”
“Well, you are,” Sabina couldn't help but point out. "That's what this-” She waved her hand at her own face by way of explanation.
“Ok, Fine. I'm crying.”
Sabina noticed Jane was still holding her hand. The pieces slowly clicked together. It couldn't be right though, could it? “I... didn't think you cared about me." Jane immediately pulled back. Stupid , Sabina thought to herself. You know she can't stand you .
But then Jane spoke. “Why? Because you don't think I have any feelings.” It sounded like an accusation, which confused Sabina further. Of course Jane had feelings. How could anyone have seen her after Bosley's death and think she didn't feel? She couldn't let Jane believe she thought that of her. And in her misguided attempt to soothe Jane she accidentally told the truth. “No… I can be really annoying. Like, a lot of the time.”
And suddenly Jane was laughing. Not cruelly though, as had happened so many times in her life. If anything Jane sounded relieved. “You can be so annoying.”
Sabina found herself desperate to explain. “I don't try to be. It just... I don't have the filter thing other people-” babbling , she thought.
But Jane was still laughing, still smiling, and still holding her hand. Was it possible? Sabina didn't want to dare believe it. But Jane seemed to truly care about her. Despite how annoying she was. It went against everything she had learned. She couldn't help but remember her parents, shoving her aside when she wanted them to play with her. Telling her over and over again to stop being an annoying brat. Her tutors quitting after mere months, complaining they weren't paid enough to deal with an annoying deviant like her... And other memories... too painful to think about.
Yet Jane was still here, and still cared, despite knowing exactly how annoying she was.
In that moment Sabina knew she belonged to Jane. She had fallen for an Angel.
Confessions (3.2) - Sabina's Perspective OC
Sabina was sparring with Elena after they got back from their last mission. She was trying to distract herself from her most recent lapse. But she couldn't help herself. Watching Jane disarm that bomb without so much as breaking a sweat had almost undone her.
The draw to Jane was so much stronger than any of the drugs she was addicted to. And the high she got from a hit of the angel was so much sweeter. In fact, since Jane had come into her life, her cravings for anything else had stopped completely. She knew Saint had been worried she was using again because she had stopped coming to him for help in weak moments. But how could she explain that she had something better now?
Thankfully, Elena always seemed to have the same excess of energy after a successful mission as she did. And training the newbie helped take her mind off of her own lapses.
Sabina could probably have gone for another hour of sparring, but she knew Elena was already past her limit. So she forced the new Angel to stop and ordered her to a shower and bed. At least Elena would sleep well.
Sabina knew she would be up all night replaying Jane's latest rejection of her.
"No, enough for one night!" She said to Elena then opened the door. “That was beautiful though, rookie” she made a sweeping bow to indicate she would not be persuaded to keep sparring. "Until next time my lady." She said with a flourish, before pulling the door shut to block Elena's laughter.
Unfortunately, despite Elena's obvious exhaustion, Sabina still felt wired. She did a spin here in the hall for her own amusement, high on the success of the mission and on her stolen kiss from Jane.
As though her thoughts had summoned her, Sabina looked up to see her Angel walking the other way.
“Jane” she called out, flush with excitement. What she didn't expect was the hard steel Jane's face seemed to be cast from. Jane had a reputation for being ice-hearted, but Sabina knew her better. And so she was shocked to see true coldness on that beautiful ebony face. “Jane what's wrong?”
“What's wrong? Better question, what’s wrong with you?”
It was as though a bucket of ice water had been dumped over her. This was it. She had finally pushed Jane too far, and now Jane was going to send her away. She knew this was bound to happen eventually. She wouldn't be weak. She put on the bravado that had been her shield from her parents and tutors, and later her partners on the street, and even her dead husband.
"That's quite a long question.'' She said with a hard grin. "Would you like big picture." she held her hands out in front of her, "chronological" She indicated a line. "Or biggest issue to smallest?" She mimed bullet points in the air. She had hoped to disarm Jane's anger with a bit of humor, but the Angel only scoffed.
"How about we discuss one specific issue. Your twisted sense of selfishness that makes you think it is ok to toy with everyone around you!”
Of all the accusations Sabina had expected, this was not one she had even considered. She could be frivolous and selfish about a lot of things. But never with her fellow Angels. “What? I- I don't what?” She couldn’t seem to even formulate a question.
“Come on Sabina. Don't play the victim act with me. It doesn't suit you.” Her voice was cold as steel. When Jane took an aggressive step towards her, Sabina found herself stumbling backwards, heart pounding in a very different way than it had been when she kissed Jane earlier that day. It was a sensation she hadn't felt since-since she had shot her husband. Fear. Jane, though, seemed to be gaining in momentum. “Tell me, does Elena know you're toying with her too? I'm guessing not. She doesn't seem the type to go in for meaningless sex. I'm one thing, Sabina. But she is innocent and naive.”
“No!” Sabina found herself stuttering. “You don't understand! That's not-” she stumbled forward, trying to grab Jane, to feel something solid as her world was crumbling around her. But Joe blocked her arm as though Sabina had been throwing a punch, then kicked, attacking her. Sabina's arms came up into a block by sheer force of habit. But training couldn't keep her legs from collapsing as Jane hissed “Don't touch me.”
Hot tears filled Sabina's eyes as she gasped for breath. Jane just stood there, staring at her. But Sabina knew instinctively knew that Jane would turn from her at any moment and then it would be too late. She had to tell her. Even if Jane abandoned her now, she needed Jane to know she could never be untrue. "Jane, there is only you. There has only ever been you."
Her words seemed to freeze the dark Angel. Finally Jane responded “And Elena?”
“We were just sparring.” The words tumbled from her mouth. “Just sparring. She wanted to learn the takedown I did earlier tonight.”
But Jane obviously still didn't believe her. “In her room? Instead of the gym?”
Sabina could feel herself losing Jane and reached out in desperation. “Please!” She cried. “Please don't go! I'm yours. I've been yours since the night at Fatima's.”
Apparently that was enough to make Jane pause, then speak. Her voice was low and dangerous. “If that were true, then why have you been playing with me ever since?”
Sabina gasped at the accusation, but Joe continued. “A kiss here, as touch there. Enough To make me want more but then you were gone.”
Sabina climbed to her feet, hope beginning to grow next to the fear. “I was terrified.” She reached out and gently took Jane's hand.
"Of what!" Jae's voice was loud and harsh.
Sabines flinched; long experience had her fully expecting a blow to land with the words, but none did. “That you would tell me to stop. That you would send me away or request a new posting. I know I should be satisfied just to be near you. But on missions, or right after, I lose control of my impulses. I can't help myself.”
“Yet you could run away.”
“Jane I had to. Every time I felt you stiffen or freeze, and I'd know I pushed too far, asked for too much. I had to run before you could tell me to stop.” She held Jane's beautiful dark eyes with her own, willing her to believe. “Because I'll do anything you say. I have to. I belong to you.”
There was a long silence between them. Finally Jane broke it with two words: “Prove it.”
Then Sabina was in Jane's arms, her neck craning up to reach Jane's lips. She ran her hands through Jane's luxurious black hair, hair she could only envy. Her body was pressed fully against Jane's, and she was kissing her as though this was her last act on earth. She was terrified that fear would become true when Jane spoke.
As if against her own will, Sabina froze on the spot as Jane stepped back. She needed Jane. Couldn't she see that? “Please,” She whispered “Please don't send me away.” She longed to reach out, to hold Jane again. Her whole body burned as if in withdrawal from coke. But Jane had said stop. “She couldn't do anything else. She looked into Jane's eyes and hope began to build in her when she saw Jane's eyes were dilated and she was breathing just as hard. Then Jane's eyes flicked toward the camera and back to Sabina.
The conversation between Sabina and Jane in Fatima's Clinic is what inspired almost all of this fic. Their conversation was either strangely non-sequitur and over-dramatic, or loaded with past demons. Jane's fear that Sabina thought her emotionless stood out to me. And Sabina's belief that no one could possibly care about her, let alone be upset that she was hurt and/or killed, due to the fact that she is annoying. And their intense bond that formed when they realized the other didn't feel as they assumed. So these are traits I built on and created this fic around.
Chapter 4: Chapter IV - Control (4.1)
My first and probably last attempt at ever writing a sex scene. But it felt necessary to get into their psyche.
Control (4.1) - Jane’s Perspective OC
Sabine and Jane fell into each other's lives easily. Their working relationship hadn’t changed in the slightest. Both women were anxious that should remain the same. Jane was devoted to her work. And though she was passionate in bed, she wanted to remain cool and focused on each assignment.
Sabina, though devoted to Jane, was too free a spirit to remain caged. She loved people and life too much to give that up. But when it was just her and Jane, she found she had control she never knew of.
The one time their two lives seemed to bleed into each other was right after a mission. Jane had been right when she guessed the missions were a drug to Sabina. The more dangerous it was, the higher she got. It was how she dealt with her once crippling addiction to alcohol and drugs, Sabina had explained to her one night when she had gotten Sabina to open us some about her past.
The latest mission had been a hard one. Sabina had lost her gun and gotten into a brawl with three bodyguards at the same time. Sabina had won... barely; her body had paid the price. But right now, as she caught Sabina's gaze across the room, she saw only blazing passion in those green eyes.
When the debriefing was over, Jane took off towards her room, half worried that Sabina would throw herself at her then and there. The only thing that gave her enough of a head start was Saint trying to waylay Sabina to get her checked out. But Sabina shook off his ministrations and caught up to Jane just outside the bedroom. Without a word Sabina pushed Jane against the door and kissed her, eyes dilated in her passion.
Jane let herself get caught up in the moment. Part of the reason she loved being with Sabina so much was that she effortlessly broke through Jane's barriers, bringing Jane into her world a fire and emotion.
But tonight, Sabina seemed manic, and it scared her. Sometimes Sabina took control, but Jane knew she couldn't let that happen tonight. She needed to calm Sabina’s fire, not feed it.
“Inside,” she ordered. Obediently Sabine turned the handle and walked Jane through the doorway. But in less time than it took to breathe, Sabina's hands were back on Jane, one hand tangled in her hair, the other pushing up under her shirt to connect with bare skin.
Jane almost succumbed to Sabina's feverish touch, but the ever-clear part of her mind reminded her that Sabina needed to see control to learn it. “Stop.” Jane said quietly. She knew Sabina would hear her. Even like this, Sabina seemed completely tuned into everything Jane did or said. And Sabia did stop briefly, technically obeying the order. But after a brief pause, her hands started searching again, her lips on Jane’s.
“Please. Not tonight.”
“I said stop,” Jane repeated severely.
Sabina froze again. This time completely. “I can’t-”
Jane wound her fingers in Sabina’s short blonde hair. “You need to slow down.” She said harshly. “Sabina, do you understand me?” When Sabina seemed about to protest Jane yanked on her hair, forcing Sabina to meet her eyes.
“Yes, Jane.” She whispered hoarsely.
“And you won’t come until I tell you to. Do you understand me, Sabina?”
Sabina was breathing hard, pleading in her eyes. Jane gave her hair a small tug again. “Yes, Jane.”
With Sabina under control her own needs came blazing to the surface. It had felt amazing when Sabina pushed her up against the door. She was sure it would feel even more amazing to be the one in control. She leaned down and passionately kissed Sabina. She grabbed Sabina’s shoulder, shoving her roughly against the dresser. She released Sabina’s hair with the other hand, cupping her neck. After a moment she then slid the hand on Sabina’s shoulder down to her waistline, then up under her shirt, loving the feeling of skin under her hand.
But as soon as Jane stopped putting pressure on the smaller angel, Sabina began pushing back. So Jane shoved into the dresser again. But Sabina broke the kiss suddenly with a sharp intake of breath, eyes closed. She slowly let it out.
Jane noticed the skin under her hand was too hot. But Sabine pushed forward again, smiling now. “Sabina. What's wrong with your ribs? I can feel the swelling.”
“It's fine,” Sabina purred, wrapping her hands behind Jane's neck trying to pull her close “Come here.”
Jane grabbed Sabina's wrists and pulled her hands down. “Talk to me. You have to tell me if you're hurt.”
“Jane I promise, it's nothing that can't wait for tomorrow. I'd tell you if it was too much.” Sabina had once told Elena she didn't feel pain anymore. Jane knew that was false. Jane suspected that Sabina actually sought out pain. She pushed herself too hard and put herself in dangerous situations to find the pain. Not for the first time Jane wondered what was in Sabina's past that haunted her and followed her this way.
But Jane didn’t push it. She could tell Sabina was close to losing control again. No matter how much it hurt Jane to see her Angel in pain, there was only so much she could demand from the Angel.. She nodded and kissed Sabina again. Then she sucked on Sabina’s ear as her hands worked on unbuttoning Sabina's pants, slipping inside. Sabina groaned and bucked against Jane's hand. As Jane fingered her clit she whispered in Sabina's ear “Remember the rules.”
Sabina nodded and buried her face in Jane's neck, groaning as Jane rolled the sensitive bead in torturously slow circles. After a few minutes, her breath was ragged and fast. "Jane… Jane, I-I can't. It's too-It's too much.” She stuttered.
Jane almost went over the edge herself seeing the warring desires in Sabina's face and body. Her need for release and her need to obey Jane at odds.
She pulled her hand out from between Sabina’s thighs and brought her fingers up to Sabina's mouth, who dutifully sucked on them.
Jane suddenly felt constricted. This was probably the longest their clothes had been on when they were alone together; a situation that needed immediate remedy. She began tearing at Sabina's clothes and Sabina took the cue, working on Jane's shirt first, then belt. As each item of clothing came off Jane walked them over to the desk so she could lean against it. She pushed Sabina down to her knees then slung one long caramel leg over Sabina's shoulder. She had one hand braced against the desk, the other hand grasping Sabina's shoulder. She let her head fall back in blissful enjoyment, reveling in Sabina's skill as her tongue entered her slit.
Jane opened her eyes as she gasped to completion. She looked down eyes wide to see thin trickles of blood on Sabina's shoulder. She looked at her hand and was further shocked to see blood on her fingernails. But Sabina hadn’t so much as flinched. In fact, she was grinning as she languidly licked at Jane.
“Up,” Jane said hoarsely. Sabina obeyed immediately, not betraying any of the pain she must be in.
She pulled Sabina towards the bed and they collapsed into it, a tangle of limbs, hands, and tongues exploring every part of each other. They seemed locked in conflict, each trying to pull the other over the edge.
As the passion built Jane said “After I come, I'll tell you when you can too."
"It's too much," Sabina complained. "You have to stop."
"No, I don’t." Jane said, not letting up as she worked two fingers inside of Sabina.
"Shh..." Jane cut her off. "You can do it. Stay with me.''
Sabina threw herself into giving Jane an orgasm. There was something to be said for experience. Sabina definitely had more than her. In moments she was gasping in ecstasy. After the aftershocks she felt the need for sleep pulling at her eyes, but she focused on her priority.
"Jane please.'' Sabina groaned.
"Stay with me baby." Her free hand stroked Sabina's face.
"I'm not strong enough," Sabina cried.
"You are," Jane encouraged.
When tears started to form in the corners of Sabina's eyes, as she desperately tried to keep herself on the edge, Jane finally released her. “Come for me, Sabina."
The words had barely left her mouth when Sabina's orgasm shook both of them.. When Sabina had finally stilled in her arms She leaned over and kissed her lover's forehead. "My beautiful Angel" she murmured into Sabina's blonde hair before finally giving way to her exhaustion.
Whew. Ok. ONWARDS.
Chapter 5: Chapter V - Control (4.2-3)
Sabina struggles knowing how out of control she can get, and fights against Jane caring for her.
Contents: brief mention of rape, aftercare.
Control (4.2) - Jane’s Perspective OC
She didn't know how long she slept. Maybe an hour at most, she thought. What had woken her was the fact that Sabina was no longer in her arms. Though she was now under a blanket, the room was cold on her sweat soaked skin without Sabina's body heat to share. She could have sworn Sabina's skin was a perpetual furnace. It's why she had turned the temperature in the room down. Simply sleeping next to Sabina she tended to get too hot.
As her mind began clearing she started to wonder at the blanket on her. They had definitely not taken the time to get under one before falling asleep. Sabina must have covered her. So where was the Angel? Jane finally managed to peel her eyes open and saw Sabina curled us on the far edge of the massive bed. She had no blankets or pillows, though for some reason. She had put on her tank top and briefs.
Jane could feel the slightest tremor through the bed. “Sabina?" Jane asked but there was no response. Jane slid over, dragging the blanket with her. "Sabina what’s wrong?"
The only answer was the barest shake of her blonde head.
Jane reached out to put a hand on Sabina's shoulder. Her skin was too hot and clammy, which meant that Sabina must be freezing in this cold air. Sabina moved her arm to cover her head. “I’m fine, Jane. Go back to sleep.”
She moved closer in concerns and saw beneath Sabina's arm a steady stream of tears marking her face. Then she remembered Sabina's ribs. Curled up as she was, her body spasming with shivers it must have been excruciating. “You’re not okay.”
- • •
Control (4.3) - Sabina’s Perspective OC
Sabina knew she should have left Jane’s room and gone back to her own. But like always she had been too weak. She couldn't bear to separate herself from Jane. She had tried, even tried dressing herself. But the reality of leaving proved too hard for her. Another testament to her shame. She told herself it was the pain that kept her from moving, but even she knew that was a lie.
She was legitimately hurt. Jane knew she was, but had no idea how bad. Her ribs weren't just bruised or displaced. She was certain that at least two of them had cracked. Each breath, each muscle- convulsion from the cold was like fire spreading from her side. But long experience told her that, pain aside, it was not immediately dangerous.
And the pain wasn’t why she was crying. In general, pain was a welcome distraction, had almost always been a welcome distraction, from how weak she was. But now Jane was going to see her weakness. It was humiliating.
"I'm fine, Jane. Go back to sleep." She whispered, knowing full well Jane would ignore her. Jane was always trying to help, to fix things. She didn't understand yet that some things were just too broken to be fixed.
Jane enclosed her in a warm, gentle embrace. "Sibi, you don't have to go through this alone. Whatever it is."
Sabina was too exhausted to push her away. "How can you stand to be with me? How does my weakness nor disgust you?"
Jane was unbearably gentle as she pushed Sabina's blonde bangs behind her ear. "Weakness? You are the strongest woman I know.''
That startled an incredulous laugh from her, which quickly turned into a gasp as fire shot Through her side.
Sabina felt tension in Jane’s hand. "Let me see your ribs.''
Sabina complied- mostly because she couldn't stand the feeling of Jane's gentle and concerned touch. This would give her a reason to pull away. She carefully stood and pulled the tank top up, staring at a corner of the ceiling as Jane leaned over to turn on the lamp.
Her lips formed a thin line as she heard the expected gasp. Sabina sighed. "It's not that bad."
"Sabina, your ribs are bruised darker than my skin! We need to get you to Saint. Or a hospital.”
"It's fine, Jane."
The tall angel stood, anger darkening her features. “You can't pull that shite with me. You can tell Elena and Bosley all you want about how you don’t feel pain. But I know you.''
Sabina smiled almost incredulously, resting her hands on her head. How could she explain what she could barely stand to think of? At times, pain was the one thing that kept her sane, what kept her grounded and present instead of drowning in the past or maniacally chasing the future. "The ribs aren't the problem," she started to say in an attempt to formulate a response. But Jane had continued in her tirade.
“What are you thinking? Do you have any idea what broken ribs can do to you? You could die, Sabina!”
"Stop, Jane." Sabina finally looked at her. "I know my body.."
"Obviously not. You're being stupid!"
"I'm not stupid, I'm broken!" Sabina snapped, her own anger growing. She could see Jane’s shock and pushed forward. "This," she waved her hands at her side "Is the least of the many, many problems I have. That I am."
"No” Jane tried to interject, but Sabina threw up a hand to stop her.
"I know you are the expert on dealing out damage. I won’t challenge your MI6 credentials there. But I am the expert at taking damage. How many times do you think I've had a rib injury?
"Sabina-" Jane was obviously exasperated.
"I'm serious. Dislocated, bruised, cracked, broken. How many times?"
Jane sighed. "From your tone I'm guessing a lot. Three?"
“Oh at least seven. The first time was when I was 8. My horse refused to take a jump, threw me into a fence. That time I had severe internal bleeding and my rib pierced my lung. This? It's nothing! I know you care about me Jane, but I'm trying to show you that what is broken in me can't be fixed or healed."
Jake was silent for a moment. "What do you mean?"
Sabina looked away, running her hands through her hair. It had always been a nervous gesture for her "Don't pretend anymore. You saw me last night. I was out of control. Like an animal. They even feel like memories of a different person." Sabina glanced at Jane but couldn't meet her eyes. "Did you consider what might have happened if you had said no?" She asked quietly.
"You would have respected me.” Jane replied calmly.
"No. I was like an animal and you know it. I couldn't have stopped. I would have tried…” she faltered then continue. “Tried to… to rape you." Sabina's eyes were locked on the floor now.
"No you wouldn't have." Jane said, voice rising but not unkindly. When Sabina didn't respond Jane stepped forward and grabbed Sabina's chin, forcing her to look into her brown eyes. "You wouldn't have. Want to know how I'm sure?"
"Enlighten me." Sabine hissed, furious at the challenge.
"You think you were weak last night? I saw iron control."
"I wanted to- " Jane rolled over her "We all want a lot of things. What matters is if we act on those desires or not." She took Sabina's face gently in her hands and rested her forehead against hers. “Last night I saw you control all those desires. Every time."
"Only because you-” Sabina protested but was cut off again.
"I didn't force you to do anything." She said firmly "I asked, and you made a choice. You, Sabina Wilson made a choice. You made several choices. Which means you CAN make a choice."
Jane held Sabina's gaze for a long time. Sabina searched those warm brown eyes. Was it the truth? Finally she nodded "I don't think I can do it without you."
Jane pulled her close into a gentle hug. "I think you can learn to. One step at a time. One choice at a time. And I will always, ALWAYS, be here to help you."
Sabina found herself crying again, face buried in Jane's hair. She held on tight, feeling like Jane was the only real thing left in the world, and Jane just held her. As Sabina calmed and started to loose her hold, Jane muttered, "Besides. It's not like you'd be remotely able to force me to do anything. You even admitted that I'm the expert on dealing damage."
This actually managed to shock laughter out of Sabine, but of course it was quickly followed by a gasp of pain. Sabina sighed, preparing herself for another lecture on her ribs. She was surprised then when Jane said "Now, let's get back to bed. You say your injury isn't dangerous, so I'll trust you and not drag Saint out of bed. But I know it hurts, and don't try to tell me it doesn't. I'm not gullible like Elena," This caused Sabina to chuckle again. “So let's get you back to bed, UNDER the covers this time. And for God’s sake lay with me, because this room is absolutely freezing.
Jane helped Sabina into the bed and pulled the covers over both of them. The intensity of the day and the emotions left Sabina feeling exhausted and drained. For once it was not the cold terrifying emptiness that always preceded or followed her manic highs. This time it was a soft thing, whispering to her that maybe, maybe, the world still held a few good things for her, despite her constant failures.
She felt so incredibly safe being held, head tucked under Jane's chin. She had no memory of ever feeling his way. Almost without meaning to, though meaning it with all her heart, Sabine whispered “I love you Jane.''
She held breath for a reaction or revulsion. But Jane, thankfully, was completely still and asleep.
Chapter 6: Chapter VI - A Failed Mission (5) Demons (6.2), Haunting 1
The argument from Chapter II. This time we see inside Sabina's head, which isn't always present in the moment.
A Failed Mission, Demons (5, 6.2) - Sabina’s Perspective (OC)
They were fighting again. Sabina could see she was making things worse, yet she couldn't quite stop herself. Jane had been helping her with her impulses and she had made incredible progress. In fact, she had much fewer manic episodes these days, in part because those were her defense to the cold numbness. And when she was with Jane she wasn't so trapped in the past and the memories that froze her.
But it was hard when she was at direct odds with Jane, and couldn't even tell her why. Doing so WOULD bring on the cold. Communication had never been her strong suit.
Yes, she had gone off plan. Again. But this time she had a reason to. Somehow their cover had been blown. Sabina had been searching the perimeter when she stumbled upon a sniper. She had frozen. Just as she always did. In a brawl she could use a gun just.. well.. Not just fine. She was a terrible shot these days. But at least she could shoot. Not when she had the drop on someone though. Hodak. Johnny Australia. She should have shot both of them. She couldn't.
Because each time she saw the same thing: Her father's gun. A white wedding dress, covered in red blood. She would get stuck in that memory on repeat.
But then there had been a gun against her head. "I guess angels don't see all." A man said with a chuckle as Sabina froze. "Davidson, what you got?" He asked the sniper.
"The dark one in my sights. Any moment now I’ll have a clean shot.”
Make a choice. Sabina thought to herself. Or Jane is gone. The cold was already setting in. But it did bring a certain clarity, just as it always had. She threw herself at the man holding the gun at her head, completely disregarding her own safety. He fired but the bullet went wildly astray. Sabina fired too, hitting the sniper in the head. Red on the floor. Red on white. She froze just long enough for the other man to tackle her. Though she smacked her head on the ground, her training took over, as well as her attitude. “What? You think you could make an angel fall?" We're not just pretty faces.” She managed to get him in a chokehold. "Sweet Dreams, and see ya in hell, bastard."
It was such a rush. She loved being an angel. Sabina stood and picked up her own gun, holstering it. She broke apart the gun belonging to the guard, scattering the pieces across the floor. Then she closed her eyes, trying to burn out the stabbing of ice in her heart. She had to check the sniper. Bosley would expect it.
A body on the floor.
"Suck it up, Sabina." She hissed. Her mind cast around for everything and anything to distract herself. Her eyes fell on the sniper’s gun. Sabina wasn't the biggest fan of guns. But Jane was always like a kid in a candy shop with a new one. Telling herself that she was just procuring a nice gift for the angel, she approached, quickly checked that the man was indeed dead, then slung the gun over her shoulder.
She stood up and crossed the room, resting her head on the cold wall for a moment. She glanced down off the balcony and saw Jane stealthily moving down three floors below. She couldn’t keep wallowing.
"Yo, Bosley, Jane. You here?" Sabina asked through her wings comm.
"I'm here,” Bosley said, "lost contact with Jane, however.”
"I had eyes on her a minute ago. She’s safe. Our cover is blown though. On my perimeter sweep I ran into two dudes. A Sniper had the drop on Jane, and his partner. They knew we were angels.”
"And?" Boz asked. "Damage report?"
"The Sniper is down for the count. Didn't have time to get him any other way. His partner will probably wake up. Eventually."
"Good work, Sabina. Get Jane and get out. Obviously this isn't going to go as planned, and I need info from the client. Is anyone else on the perimeter?"
"Nope, not now. But there will probably be more soon. I'll get Jane and get out.”
Sabina slung the Sniper rifle over her shoulder Then worked on finding her way down to the factory floor to get the other Angel. She found a metal fire escape ladder which went all the way to the ground floor. "Going down”' she said with a grin. Sabina put her boots on the outside of the poles. She slid at a reckless pace down all 3 stories, using her boots to screech to a halt about 5 feet from the bottom, then jumped down with a flourish.
It was hard for her to remain stealthy, especially after a fight. But the last thing they needed was to alert the factory graveyard shift and drag civilians into the fray. With that in mind it wasn't hard to pick out Jane's mostly likely path through the factory. Before long, she was looking through our office window and saw her angel.
She loved seeing Jane at work and her devotion to the assignment. Sabina wondered, sometimes, what it would be like. She was loyal to Charlie, of course. But the level of commitment Jane devoted to a mission almost made Sabina jealous... if it didn't make her so hot watching the angel work.
Jane looked up then, and Sabina couldn’t help grinning and waving. Anticipating the returning scowl, Sabina held up the sniper rifle and pointed at it.
The scowl did indeed come, and after a quick look around she silently stalked over to the smaller angel. "what the hell is this?"
"Got you a new toy.” Sabina handed her the rifle. "Saw it on a guard and knew it would look better on you. Anyways, our cover is blown and Boz wants us out so she can assess intel and form a new plan."
"What did you do?!"
Sabina covered Jane’s mouth with her hand and dragged her down under cover as a factory worker went by. Sabina put a finger to her own mouth indicating silence and led the way out.
"Boz what's going on?"' Jane demanded as soon as they were back at the meetup.
"Sabina's perimeter sweep didn't go as expected. The mission as planned is going to have to be scrapped. You two, go back to headquarters and wait for new orders."
She got in the car and drove off, leaving Jane staring incredulously at Sabina who asked. "Like your new gun? Come on, I'll race you back."
The Angels had barely made it inside from the garage before Jane was yelling. It wasn’t necessarily hard to get Jane angry, but it was hard to get her to lose control and show it. Changing mission plans was one surefire way to do that. And Sabina couldn’t help pushing those buttons. It was who she was. Especially considering her impulses were getting out of control again. She had come so close to losing Jane. She had killed again to stop it. The cold nothing was clawing at her chest and she was desperately trying to drown it with emotion and noise.
"Look, Jane. The plan was half-assed as it was. You have to admit, a dead sniper and a
knocked-out guard is a way more fun outcome. Also, I wanted to get you something nice." She said with a grin, motioning toward the rifle.
"It was supposed to be a stealth mission!" Jane snapped. “But now Bosley is out there running damage control and constructing back stories because you can't possibly bear to stay out of sight. What's worse is you don't even care! You don't care that you doubled Bosley's work or that when you acted without orders you left me out to dry.”
Sabina scoffed. “Leave you out to dry? Are you an angel or not? Like anything could have happened that you weren't prepared to handle. Besides, the plan was shot as soon as we lost comm connection with you, in case you hadn’t noticed.”
Jane looked surprised, but recovered quickly. "Oh is that what happened? I thought you had actually learned to shut up."
Sabina was starting to get annoyed at Jane’s stubbornness. "No, I'm afraid you have to shove me off a roof to achieve that particular trick.''
Jane looked absolutely incredulous, and for a moment Sabina was pleased she had evoked such strong emotions in Jane. Until Jane's response.
"Why? Why can't you get over that? God you are so annoying!"
Sabina was instantly paralyzed. She could barely breathe.
"Oh, glad to know something else can shut you up too. Now if you excuse me, I have actual important work I have to do." She spun on her heel and stalked off.
"Jane," Sabina tried to reach out.
"Don't you dare follow me," she snarled.
Sabina couldn't see her though. She was only vaguely aware she had sunk to the floor gasping for breath. She banged her head against the wall several times, but it was no good. She wasn't in a Townsend Agency anymore.
The women she loved was walking away from her.
• •• •
Haunting; a Flashback1 - OC
Sabina could barely breathe; something was wrong with her ribs. The world spun and her head pounded as she fell out of the car. She tried to catch herself but couldn't. Her arm had been broken in the crash.
Sabina took a deep break and sat up. The street spun and she barely leaned back over in time to throw up. Am I concussed? She thought. Probably . But something else was wrong. Why did I crash in the first place?
She heard the screeching of tires and an engine she knew well. She couldn't really see, but she heard the slamming of car doors, booted feet, and laughter.
"Devonte" Sabina gasped. "Help me. We gotta get out of here."
"Bro, she's wrecked." Said Daria, Devonte's sister and Sabina’s lover. "We better get her and get out. Either the Cops or Liam's crew will be here any minute. Sabina, what were you thinking? That's Liam's car!"
Sabina groaned. She was having a hard time understanding Daria. "Devonte ordered me to- "
Devonte started chuckling. Daria looked at him incredulously. "Devonte? Why on earth would you tell her to do that?"
The gang leader was laughing outright now. "The perfect solution, little Sis,”
"She crashed it." Daria said, reaching down to rub Sabina’s back "We can't hide this!”
"We don't want to. It's perfect. As planned."
As planned? Sabina though? "Wha- what did you do to me?''
Devonte snorted. “I’m shocked you can even tell? But this is on you. No one made you snort that much coke."
"You cut it with something." Sabine groaned she held her head with her good arm, trying to stop the street from spinning.
Daria stood up "Where the hell, Devonte!" She said. “You can't drug one of the team! How do you think the boys are going to take hearing something like that?''
The gang boss shrugged. “To be honest, they're perfectly happy to have an excuse to ditch this obnoxious bitch."
"And did you think what I wanted? Or what Liam will do to us?”
"Look, I know you like this bitch, for some godforsaken reason. But I did this to get Liam off our back.”
“After you antagonized him in the first place.'' Daria muttered.
"Fair. I was dumb thinking I could take him on," He admitted. “But, this train wreck is the answer.” He kicked at Sabina. “We’ll blame it all on her. Say she went rogue, was trying to start her own gang. Why else would she do something as stupid as break into Liam’s own home and steal his car. We let Liam do whatever the hell he wants. We're free of her, and it gives us time to figure out something new with Liam and his gang.
"Daria, help" Sabina struggled to say. She didn’t seem to be able to move at all anymore.
Daria turned towards Sabina but Devonte grabbed her arm and pulled her away. “Look, I'm sure you can find another hot white bitch. One that isn't so annoying and drunk or high all the time.''
Sabina was begging, crying, screaming. But nothing was happening. Whatever Devonte had dosed her with had taken complete hold of her body.
"Come on, sis." Devonte tugged Daria's arm. "She isn't worth saving."
Daria sighed. "Well, she was quite the fuck. But an annoying fuck up as well."
Sabina couldn't even cry as the woman she loved walked away leaving her in the street,
• •• •
There were a couple things I wanted to explore when I started writing this story. 1) Why Sabina thinks she not worth anything because she's annoying. 2) Why she can't seem to ever shoot anything (I think she might hit one or two bad guys, but usually in an intense fight. 3) Sabina not getting past Jane shoving her off of a roof. I also wanted to tie in a couple things I noticed from her rap sheet.
Anyways, I hope it's not too forced, and y'all enjoyed it.
Chapter 7: Chapter VII - Demons (6.2-3), Haunting 2
Sabina tries and fails to deal with her past demons.
Demons (6.2) - Sabina’s Perspective
"Stop it, Sabina! Stop! It's not the same.'' Sabina forced her mind to the present. She kept reminding herself that, while it had been one of the worst nights of her life, it had led to the best opportunity. The police luckily got to her before Liam did. Had the rival gang leader gotten to her first she was under no illusions she would be dead now, or irreparably maimed. But the cops got to her first, and that's when Charlie found her. Charlie showed her the true meaning of belonging and loyalty. The Townsend Agency gave her purpose, and helped her overcome her crippling addiction to drugs and alcohol.
Remembering that helped Sabina rip her mind back to the present. It's not the same. It's not the same. She told herself over and over. The Townsend Agency would never betray her like Daria and Devonte had.
Sabina pulled herself to her feet. No matter how annoying she was, Charlie, Boz, and the Angels would never leave her to die.
Sabina stumbled to the bathroom just down the hall. They wouldn't abandon me . Sabina told herself, splashing water on her face.
But Jane walked away. Just as Daria had walked away. Unbidden the two memories overlapped, clouding her vision.
"Stay. Here. Sabina." She punctuated each word by smashing her left fist into the mirror each time. Her vision cleared as she focused on the pain of her now sliced and battered knuckles.
"Shit." She muttered as blood started streaming over her hand to stain the counter. But she welcomed the immediacy of the pain and the mess. It kept her mind fixated on the here and now. Trying to think of nothing but the pain, she carefully picked the pieces of glass from her knuckles, rinsed off the gashes, then opened the cabinet under the sink to find something to stop the flow of blood and clear up the mess.
She glanced down. That was a mistake. Red on White. Blood on a Wedding dress. The first time she had killed.
And she had killed again today.
• •• •
Haunting 2 - OC
Technically, she and Trevor were already married. They had gone to city hall two days before without telling anyone. Trevor had suggested that her parents would probably find some way to sabotage them somehow, and Sabina had no trouble seeing that reality. Her parents hated Trevor even more than they hated her. They were determined to see the worst in both of them. They were sure that she had picked someone below her social class just to anger them; a working class private investigator, of all things.. And they were absolutely determined that Trevor was after nothing but her inheritance. But they had always been incapable of seeing her happy, so she dismissed them and their fears.
And she was happy. Happier than she could ever remember being. She never wanted to be apart from Trevor.
The formal ceremony was soon. Traditionally they weren't supposed to see each other . But well, they were already married. And Sabina had never been able to follow the rules.
She smiled as she made her way to her parents' suite, which Trevor was using as his dressing room. It wasn't traditional. But Sabina had a feeling her father had offered it so he could keep Trevor close by. And because her parents knew every item of value in the room, and could easily tell if something went missing. Her parents had a horrible habit of assuming anyone poorer than themselves were thieves.
The door was cracked and Sabine smiled to hear her love's voice. She paused for a moment just to listen.
"Come on, one more!" Trevor said.
"Bro, shouldn't you slow down a bit? You still need to get through your big day.'' It was Trevor's best man and P.I. partner, Bryant.
Sabina smiled to herself, hearing their excitement.
"Big day?" Trevor laughed raucously. "Dude, this is all a smokeshow. I’ve already won. Today is the celebration."
"Yeah. Ok man isn't that a bit premature? You still have to get rid of the bitch."
The dismissive scorn was easy to hear in his voice. "Yeah, like that will be hard while we're wandering around South America on our stupid honeymoon. A quick accident, then her Trust fund is mine."
Sabina had gone cold and numb, all emotion seemingly gone. She stumbled through the door. “Trevor?" she managed to say.
"Shit" her husband yelled, jumping back and knocking several bottles off of the drink cart.
“What’s going on?”
"Nothing, baby!" Even in her shocked state she could see the guilt and truth written all over his face. "You're not supposed to be here!” Trevor said with a forced smile. “The wedding is starting, I was just about to go down!"
Sabina laughed with far more bravado than she actually felt. “Wedding? Are you fucking kidding me? God, the one time my parents were actually right.”
"What do you mean, baby?" Trevor asked uncomfortably. "Come on, it's time for the ceremony!"
"You’re a gold digger" Sabina shook her head. Her eyes filled with tears but didn't spill. "We're done. Get out!” She yelled.
Trevor's face darkened. "Oh no we are not. Did you forget we are already married?"
Sabine shook her head. "That’s going to change immediately. My father may be an obnoxious prig, but I can guarantee that he'll be more than willing to help me here. He has lawyers that will bury your ass." she spun towards the door, but Bryant had closed it and was blocking the way out. "Move jagoff." she snapped.
"Look Wilson, we can still figure this out. In fact, it's to your benefit to figure things out.” Bryant removed his tailcoat, revealing his underarm holsters. The threat was obvious.
There was a cold cloying fear settling on her chest, something she had never quite felt before. She turned back to look at Trevor. His gun was already in his hand.
"Come on Sabina. Let's handle this like adults. You've heard that word before, right? It means maturity. Good sense. I know neither of those come naturally to you. But maybe give it a shot, yeah?"
This newfound cold somehow helped Sabina think. "Right," she said softly. She started walking towards her parents’ large bed. "We can… figure this out.'' Her white wedding dress rustled as she sat near the headboard.
"Amazing." Trevor said. "Looks like you can behave. Here's what's going to happen. We are going to go down and play out this farce. You are going to make sure no one suspects a thing.”
Sabina couldn't help but laugh bitterly. "How?" she spat “I think the guests will notice a gun to my head. Behind her where Trevor couldn't see, Sabina's hand was moving between the mattress and headboard, searching.
"Act. God knows it’s your turn. I've managed to pull off this sickening 'in love' scene for seven brutally long months.
"You're my hero, Trevor." Bryant said with a laugh. "I'd have killed her by month two."
Sabina's hand hit something hard and cold. “So we get through today. With the implication that you’ll kill me if I don’t behave. Then what?" Her fingers closed around the object.
"Then we get through the next day. And the next." Trevor said, brandishing his gun. "With your mouth shut." He chuckled. "Unless it's around my Cock.” he amended. “You are good at that, annoying as you are.''
She shouldn't have been able to hear it. Not with the blood pounding in her ears. Yet she was more aware than she ever had been. Bryant had cocked his revolver. The room exploded in sound and motion; Sabine stood and spun. There was a strange pressure in her leg, then her side, and wood chips exploded from the headboard by her head, cutting across her face. She ignored all of this, flipping the safety off her father's pistol and squeezed off two rounds at Bryant then two more at Trevor.
She didn't need to see to know she had hit both marks. She was an excellent markswoman. Range shooting was the one thing she could do with her father that didn't end in her screaming at him and him hitting her.
The room went quiet. Sabina took a step and stumbled. Her hand holding the gun began shaking so violently that she dropped it. She looked down to see her pristine white wedding dress blossoming with blood. Pain exploded in her leg, followed by her said. She finally looked up and saw both Trevor and Bryant laying on the floor unmoving.
Ice flooded her chest, drowning all emotions. She collapsed to the ground and stared down, watching as the red overtook the white on what should have been the happiest day in her life.
• •• •
Demons (6.3) - Sabina’s Perspective
Sabina wasn't sure how long she had been staring at the red and white towel on her knuckles. She couldn't feel it anymore, the pain. There was just empty logic. Completely unfeeling she found the first aid kit under the sink. She barely winced as she poured alcohol over her fist, wrapped it in cotton cloth then taped it for pressure.
A small part of her was screaming, trapped. She couldn't go back to this. She couldn't live like this, because this was not living. But she didn't know how to fix it. Not without either drugs or Jane.
And Jane wanted nothing to do with her.
• •• •
Sabina mentioning the gunfight at her wedding is probably the most random and interesting line in the movie, imo. So I wanted to come up with something. I also wanted to continue the theme of why she can't seem to shoot anyone.