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what's better, sex or super mario sunshine

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“Can you—ugh,” Zhuge Liang, aka Lord El-Melloi II grumbles, drowned out by the sound of Mario falling into the abyss. The sound of trumpets follows, a colorful ‘TOO BAD!’ bouncing on the screen as he’s kicked back to Delfino Plaza. “That’s the third time, I’m running out of lives.”

 

“Hey, it’s not my fault,” Gudako combs her fingers through a plait of his hair. The fluorescent lights of Chaldea highlight just how silky El-Melloi’s hair is, the strands smooth and straight, slipping through her fingers as she strokes it. “You said you wanted some modern-ish video games, didn’t you? And you did pick out this one yourself…”

 

“I’m not talking about the game, it’s fine,” El-Melloi growls, angling his head to glare back at his master. “I’m talking about you.

 

Gudako arches her brow, tilting her head innocently as she weaves the plait of hair she was stroking into a loop, curling it around another plait. “Well, I’d be done with your hair faster if you didn’t move around so much, you know.”

 

El-Melloi rolls his eyes, turning back to the screen. “That’s not the problem and you know it.”

 

“It’s not? Huh,” Gudako says, finishing out the section of the braid she’s been working on. She pets her hand along El-Melloi’s scalp, scooting in closer from where she’s been knelt behind him, nestling comfortably against his back. Her breath puffs against his exposed neck. “I wonder what it could be, then.”

 

As Gudako’s breasts press against his shoulder blades, El-Melloi lets out a full-body shudder, dropping his controller. Gudako doesn’t seem perturbed, simply running her fingers along the fine hairs against the base of his neck, her thumb sweeping in slow circles against his nape. El-Melloi tries to growl, maybe encourage her to stop distracting him from his game, but all that comes out is a choked whine.

 

Snorting, Gudako lets out a laugh, resting her chin on his shoulder. “What kind of noise was that? I didn’t know your voice could even go that high.”

 

El-Melloi just sits there, feeling his blood starting to boil—no, not boil, not like that. It’s simmering, taking to heat at a sluggish pace. It floods his face with color, flowing down and settling at the pit of his stomach. He shuffles under her grasp, gritting his teeth, trying to close up his legs from where he’d had them splayed out. “Just shut up, you’re annoying me—”

 

“What? Come on,” Gudako rubs her face in against El-Melloi’s cheek, looping her other arm around his neck as she cards her fingers through his bangs. The motion makes his glasses go askew. “You’re not really that mad, are you? You’ve still got plenty of lives left.”

 

“That’s—nngh,” El-Melloi bites the inside of his cheek, trying to keep himself from making more noise. She’s pressing in harder against him, smoothing her hand over his chest, teasing her fingers against his tie. “That’s not the… problem… you’re. You’re fogging up my glasses, being so close. And I can’t reach my handkerchief from here—”

 

Gudako, bold and brash, lifts both her hands to slip El-Melloi’s glasses from his face. “How’s this?”

 

“Well, now I can’t see,” El-Melloi says, tilting his head away from her with a pout. “So thanks for that.”

 

“Liar,” Gudako blows a raspberry at him, both arms looping around his shoulders now. “You don’t always need glasses, I’ve seen you walk around just fine without them. Or what, are they your gamer glasses?”

 

El-Melloi bristles at that, feeling his ears turn warm. “Don’t call them that.”

 

“Major League Gamer, Lord El-Melloi II,” Gudako pats his chest, resting her head against his. El-Melloi’s face flushes now, her warmth seeping through his suit and forcing a shudder from him. “Can’t even get past the secret Ricco Harbor stage without running off the edge of the platform. What would the gaming community at large think?”

 

“It’s not my fault, you keep distracting me!” El-Melloi crosses his arms huffily, forcing Gudako to lift her arms up and away from him—though she remains pressed against his back. “You keep playing with my hair and touching my neck, it’s throwing off my focus.”

 

“Your neck?” Gudako hums. El-Melloi feels his stomach drop. When she hums like that, she’s usually up to no good. She leans away from him, the press of her chest finally easing off him, but El-Melloi can’t help but feel as if something worse is coming for him. But it doesn’t; instead, Gudako scoots back, resuming her work on his braid. Her fingers slide through the strands of his hair gently, her voice soft and thoughtful, “Didn’t know you had a sensitive neck.”

 

El-Melloi grimaces. What’s she up to? She was all clingy not even a few seconds ago, and now she’s barely even touching him? Huffing through his nose, El-Melloi picks up his controller and starts playing again. He still feels a little hot under the collar, but if he just focuses on getting the next Shine, he’ll be fine. His Master is impossible to read, but that’s fine. He’s fine. Just focus on the game. He won’t think about how she’s brushing his hair aside and exposing his nape. It’s fine.

 

And then Gudako licks a stripe up the back of his neck, and El-Melloi just about melts into the ground. His controller clatters to the floor, again, and his legs fall open again. There’s no hiding the tent in his slacks, his cock pressing uncomfortably against his fly. Her tongue is soft and warm against his skin, sucking a kiss into his sensitive flesh.

 

El-Melloi lets out a choked groan, his hands scrambling for purchase against the floor. Gudako doesn’t let up, her hands smoothing up his ribs, thumbing open the buttons of his waistcoat. One hand moves up, fingers digging into his tie, loosening it, all while he’s twitching and helpless and breathing funny and how many hickeys is she going to leave on my neck—

 

“Can you get up?” Gudako murmurs against him, the heel of her palm nudging against his cock. “I wanna ride you.”

 

Sputtering, El-Melloi tries forming a sentence through his sudden, intense haze of lust, slurring, “That quickly—?! I’ve—I’ve never even—”

 

She squeezes him through his slacks, cutting him off. “Don’t worry about it, I still want to.”

 

The edge to her voice, her proximity, her confidence in spite of his inexperience—El-Melloi struggles to his feet, Gudako leading him by the hand for one, two long strides before he collapses on the bed nestled in the corner. With little regard for his own clothes, El-Melloi all but rips his tie off, shrugging impatiently out of his jacket and waistcoat, his torso completely bared in a matter of minutes. His hands fumble with his fly as Gudako rummages through her skirt pockets to pull out a condom and a small bottle of lubricant.

 

“You—you just carry those around?” El-Melloi says, his voice a strained wheeze.

 

Gudako looks at him, her cheeks tinted pink. She smiles and shrugs, unbuttoning the first few buttons of her Mystic Code. “I like to be prepared for anything.”

 

He isn’t sure if he’s falling in love, or if he’s just turned on to the point of dizziness, but he can’t suppress the helpless moan that bubbles up at that. Biting his lip, El-Melloi tears his eyes away from her, tearing at the button fly and pulling the zipper down. His hips are bony, and he swears under his breath as they catch at the hem of his slacks.

 

Just as he’s wiggling free of his pants, Gudako looms over him. She’s only in her underwear now, her arms behind her back as she unhooks the latch of her bra. El-Melloi just about chokes on his own spit as her breasts fall free, his hands moving on their own as he cups one in his palm. Gudako sucks in a breath as she closes in on him, her hands pressing firmly at his shoulders to ease him onto his back.

 

“You seem to know what you’re doing,” El-Melloi says, feeling himself cringe at just how rough and unattractive his voice sounds to his own ears. “I thought you said you’ve never…”

 

Gudako maneuvers him so that he’s splayed out properly on the mattress, settling herself on his stomach. He can feel how damp her panties are like this, and he sucks in a harsh breath once she starts grinding against him. Her voice is low and shaky, a moan framing her words, “I’m not stupid, I’ve taken sex ed, I’ve watched good porn, I’m ready for this.”

 

Before El-Melloi can speak up again, she scoots further down his body, nudging his legs apart and sitting between them. She eases her panties off, tossing them aside as she squeezes some of the lubricant onto her fingers. She tosses the condom and bottle at his face once she’s finished, saying, “Put that on and lube yourself up, it’s easy. Get yourself nice and wet for me, El-Melloi.”

 

Gulping around the lump in his throat, El-Melloi doesn’t need to be told twice, carefully ripping open the condom packaging as he pulls his cock free from his boxers. He jerks himself once, twice, before sliding the rubber over himself.

 

El-Melloi realizes how badly he’s shaking as he pours the lubricant into his hand, his eyes pinned to Gudako between his legs. Her eyes are shut, teeth worrying her bottom lip as her fingers slip in and out of herself. It’s so wet, she’s dripping onto the bed sheets, her hips rolling, a moan tumbling forth as she presses in firmly. El-Melloi jerks himself off erratically at the sight, breath wheezing from his nose—he remembers to clutch at the base of his cock, just as he can feel a premature orgasm creep on him.

 

Cumming before I’m even inside her would be… El-Melloi’s cheeks flush. Horrifying.

 

Gudako ambles over him, her fingers slowly drawing out of her pussy, using them to spread her lips open. She wipes her hand off on the sheets, her hips lined up with his. Her voice comes out rough as she says, “Hold yourself in place for me.”

 

Not trusting his voice, El-Melloi nods, keeping his grip firm around himself as she lines up. This is really happening. He’s about to have sex with his Master. He’s about to have sex with a human fucking being. His heart hammers against his rib cage, pulse thundering loudly in his ears, as she lowers herself onto him. It feels like it’s playing out in slow motion, the gradual wet warmth kissing at his cockhead, the gradual, dizzying intensity as she pushes down. El-Melloi’s eyes roll back in his head, his mouth dropping open with a loud whine as she squeezes around him.

 

“Tight,” he says absent-mindedly, his fingers twitching, teeth chattering. El-Melloi blinks his eyes open, lifting his free hand to grip at her thigh. “M—Master… you’re… mm, tight… and—aahh, fuck…

 

Gudako hisses out a string of unintelligible curses, a tear squeezing past her eye and clinging to her lashes. Her face is flushed entirely red, her hips trembling as she shakily pushes herself down more, huffing through her mouth, breathing through the stretch. “Fuck, fuck, fuck—El-Melloi—”

 

It takes El-Melloi a moment to realize oh, that’s me. Something aches in his chest, then; it’s strange, being called by his former teacher’s title in bed. He doesn’t like it. Biting the inside of his cheek, El-Melloi squeezes her thigh. “… Waver.”

 

“Huh?” Gudako opens one eye, finally sitting down fully on El-Melloi’s cock.

 

“Call me… Waver,” he pants, moving both hands to settle on her hips. “It’s my real name.”

 

Gudako’s eyes go soft, her lips parting. And slowly, she smiles, smoothing her hands up and down Waver’s stomach as she adjusts to him, her voice still a little strained as she gives his real name a try. “Waver.”

 

His cock pulses inside her at the sound of it. He lets out a moan, tipping his head back. “Fuck.

 

“Oh, Waver,” Gudako teases, rolling her hips a little, squeezing around him. Carefully, she lifts herself up, and then eases back down. She cries out, “Waaaaaaaver…

 

Neither of them last long. Soon enough, they can’t even speak properly—Waver’s tongue feels too big for his mouth, his voice reaching heights that are both nostalgic and embarrassing for him. Gudako loves it, fucking herself up and down in erratic thrusts, babbling his name, smiling like she’s been let in on a big secret—and it’s true, only one other Servant knows about his real, actual name, and he’s not even here yet.

 

“Waver,” Gudako pants, squeezing tightly around his cock. “You’re so cute.

 

Eyes snapping open, Waver digs his fingers in hard against her hips, arching up and into her, fucking deep into her pussy. He cums like that, embarrassingly fast, pulse after pulse of cum filling the condom to near-bursting—

 

“Shit,” Waver grits his teeth. He should’ve pulled out before he came, but she’s just so hot, so tight, and he feels like he can just keep cumming, bone-tingling pleasure vibrating throughout his entire body. He was hoping he’d last a little longer, but fuck, he can hardly hold himself together when she says his name like that.

 

His orgasm is so sudden, so intense, Waver thinks he blacks out for a few minutes. He must have, because the next time he opens his eyes, Gudako is gone. The sound of the shower in his bathroom proves that she hasn’t completely abandoned him, but still. Her absence leaves him feeling empty.

 

Waver licks his lips, looking down at himself. He’s still got the used condom on. Grumbling, Waver turns onto his side and pulls it off, tying the end before it leaks. It’s slick and wet, heavy with his cum, and… tinted red.

 

Before he can panic, Waver realizes it’s the outside of the condom that’s smeared with blood.

 

Wait. Waver feels his heart jump up into his throat, his body flushing with heat anew. Was this her first time?

 

“And she had it with me?” he mutters out loud, limply dropping the used condom into the trash. He’s getting dizzy, and he hasn’t even tried getting up yet. He was his Master’s first time. He repeats those words to himself, over and over, feeling a little more giddy each time.

 

Is he smiling? He’s not sure. Gudako comes back out, but she doesn’t say anything—she just smiles at him, her hair damp and clinging to her cheeks.

 

“Was that your—?” Waver blurts out.

 

“Um,” Gudako fidgets with the towel draped around her shoulders, her breasts pushing together. “Yes?”

 

Numbly, Waver turns onto his back. “Jesus H. Christ. Both of us. Both of us.”

 

Gudako sits on the mattress next to his head, her fingers combing through his sweat-slicked bangs. It’s tender, and Waver’s afraid that he might explode. “Shower’s open. Get in there while I change the sheets, we can cuddle.”

 

“Mm,” he grumbles, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed. “I’m new to cuddling, too. Won’t be my fault if we end up tangled together.”

 

“That’s the fun of it!” Gudako chuckles. Her face is still pink, her lips warm as she presses a kiss to the tip of his nose. Waver gurgles in his throat at the intimacy, pouting as he pushes himself abruptly to his feet.

 

Waver lets out a yelp as Gudako pinches his ass.