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Ugly Sweater

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Noctis hates going shopping, he bloody hates it. The shops are always too warm and too crowded, especially now that Shiva's winter festivities are approaching and all of Insomnia is caught up into present hunt madness. If it were for him he'd never go shopping, and in fact he had Ignis buy stuff in his place in more than one occasion. The only exceptions are the gifts for Ignis, for obvious reasons, and for Prompto, as he's usually into stuff that can easily be bought online, zero effort, delivered straight to his door.

"Come on Noct, you're gonna be so cute in this!" Prompto giggles, offering the prince what's probably the ugliest sweater in the entire shop. It's red and wonky, with a big cactuar wearing a scarf knitted on the front; it's truly hideous, and the poor cactuar actually looks like it's begging to be freed from its painful existence.

"No way!" the ravenette protests, shaking his head and taking a step back, as if he needed to run away from the threat; never on Eos that atrocious thing will touch his body!

"You're so boring," the blond pouts, making the biggest puppy eyes he can. The little shit knows what his friend's weaknesses are.

"But it's so ugly," Noctis tries to explain, wincing a little because he's so close to giving up. Prompto pouting just does things to him; but no, he must be strong for his own dignity!

"Look, you're already sulking," the freckled boy teases, his soft lip still turned downwards to to pity him.

"Am not," the prince frowns, shuffling his foot on the linoleum floor; well, maybe he is a little grumpy, but who wouldn't in front of the menace of such an horrendous piece of clothing?

"Yes you are," Prompto chirps, elbowing him lightly, "besides, it's just a sweater, it won't kill you to at least try it on."

He hates when the blond is so smug, if they weren't in a public place he'd just pin him to the wall and kiss him to get rid of that cute smirk.

"Okay, I'll try it on," Noctis agrees, snatching the poor sweater from his boyfriend's hands and rushing towards the changing room, "but you try the chocobo one," he challenges, pointing a sweater just as ugly. It's blue, with a cursed yellow chocobo wearing a stupid pointy hat knitted on it.

"Aw thank you buddy, I can't wait to see how it looks on you!" the blond grins, taking the atrocious thing and gingerly following towards the changing room.

"Shut up!"

Looked up close the sweater is even worse than Noctis imagined; not only the cactuar on it is horrendous, but the whole thing is also shapeless. He knows oversized stuff is a thing, but he prefers his clothes to be more on the form-fitting side, so at least he doesn't look even scrawnier than he already is. Geez, is he really thinking that the sweater would look better if it were the right size? The thing just belongs in hell, end of the story!

"Noct, you've been in there for ages, did the swater strangle you?" the blond mocks.

"No, unfortunately I'm still alive," Noctis sneers, biting his lip. It's so embarrassing to go out like that.

"I want to see you," Prompto chuckles, "I bet you're fabulous."

"Will you stop it?" the ravenette grunts, finally exiting the changing room "I swear if you're not wearing the chocobo one..."

"But I am wearing the chocobo one," Prompto winks making a pirouette to show off his atrocious outfit.

Noctis's mouth drops open for a second before he can steady himself; even in that horrendous sweater the blond is gorgeous, to say the least. Of course the clothing itself is still icky, but the blue wool brings out the indigo in his eyes, and the yellow compliments his hair and freckles, making them look like pure gold. He gulps; Uniqlo changing rooms aren't really the place to get horny.

"Are you okay, Noct?" the boys asks, smiling softly. He expected the prince to be brooding, but actually he's not. He just looks baffled and dreamy more than anything else.

"Um, yeah, it's just - you look good in that," he mutters, his cheeks heating up.

"Dork," Prompto laughs, "I look like an idiot. You were right, these holiday jumpers are nasty."

"Hey I was serious, you're beautiful," the ravenette insists, gently caressing his boyfriend's chest as he takes another look at his figure. He entirely forgot he's wrapped up in the same embarrassing outfit.

"If you say so," the blond snickers, tenderly placing his hands on his boyfriend's hips, "but honestly I prefer you without it," he purrs, tugging at the hem of Noctis's sweater and closing the distance between them.

"Why don't you help me out of it then," the prince suggests, dragging the other back inside the changing room and closing the door just in time before their lip crash together. They shouldn't be doing this in public, as scandal is always around the corner for the heir to the throne, but when you're sixteen it's hard to resist. Prompto's lips are just too squishy and soft against Noctis's, and they have a subtle taste of cola thanks to that chapstick he always uses. The blond moans faintly as Noct's tongue caresses his lower lip, then he parts his lips to let him in. It's wet and sloppy, but it feel just so good to kiss like this, both all heated up and pressed together. The blond's hands soon start roaming under his boyfriend's T-shirt, caressing the warm skin beneath. The closeness really does it for Noctis, whose lips abandon Prompto's to ravish his neck instead. He scrapes at the delicate skin there with his teeth, making the other moan almost sinfully, then starts licking and sucking. Prompto whimpers at the sensation; he's most likely to bruise, but he doesn't care, he likes when the other marks him with hickeys.

"You're so hot," Noctis whispers in a coarse voice, pressing further into the blond who catches his lips in another kiss.

Finally the prince's phone rings, interrupting them. It's Ignis, who's waiting for them outside to drive them home. Their lips are red and swollen, so it's quite clear they've been making out, but there's something more urgent to hide.

"We look like we're about to explode," Noctis blurts out, his cheeks red as he stares in worry at Prompto's groin and at his.

"Don't know about you dude, but I also feel like it," Prompto chuckles; he's blushing too, but at times he's capable of saying the dirtiest things.

"I think we should buy them," Noct suggests, pointing at the ugly sweaters now discarded on the little stool.

"Uh?"

"The sweaters, you chocobo-head," he explains, a smug smile on his face, "they're long enough to hide it."

"Are you sure? You were so ashamed to even leave the changing room with that on," Prompto laughs.

"I can't go outside like this either," the prince replies, all flustered, "are you with me?"

"Ever at your side!


When Ignis saw them approaching the car all wrapped up in the most grotesque sweaters he had ever seen he knew they were up to something, but no matter how hard he tried he couldn't figure out up to what. Maybe the ugliness of the clothing itself was the whole point.