I don't know why I did this.
Shuck is the one that narrates everything, just so you know.
Oh yes, I was watching some amazing images of Hot Pants, I loved them. I was feeling great while beating my meat, yes, she was amazing, but not as amazing as my boyfri- as my friends, no homo bruh.
I was just cleaning everything after a good sesion of Hot Pants images, now I could put Kris and my jojo figurines in normal positions, you know, I didn't want them to see what just happened, it would be weird and homo, and I'm not homo.
I just finished putting everything nicely and in a memey format when my no homo friends texted me through a group we had just for the three of us, it was called: "The holy trinity".
We usually just sent memes... but today, apparently they wanted to hang out in person, I mean, there's nothing wrong with meeting with your friends, but that would look pretty homo, and I'm not homo.
I needed an excuse for why I couldn't see them...
"Sorry guys, I have to study"
Yes! That was the best text I could have ever sent, they will believe it!
"Boi- Yesterday you just told us that you didn't have any exams any time soon and that you could relax"
DAMN YOU JOJO SONG MAN AND YOUR GREAT NOT HOMO MEMORY.
"I never said that, you're having visions because your masculinity has disappeared."
A quick reminder of when he lost the only masculinity he had left, now I won't have to see my not homo friends, no homo.
"Shuck, that actually hurt my feelings..."
Oh shit, I'm not homo, I don't know how to say things without sounding homo... AND I'M NOT HOMO.
"I'm sorry man... no homo"
Yes, that's perfect, now they'll leave me alone and I will have some peace. Fucking finally.
"Leave me alone. Now I'll hang out with Scrub without you and we'll read Stone ocean."
OH NO HE DID NOT.
"We'll read stone ocean? I'LL GO THANK OUR LORD AND SAVIOUR DIO THAT SHUCK IS A BITCH"
I hate them. Can you believe they actually made me go out to go to Scrub's house? Now I'm on his bed in a not homo way, I had to make sure they didn't destroy their only brain cell left reading tHAT.
--The things you make me do just so you don't destroy the only brain cell you have -I hate them- And don't look at me like that Scrub, it looks as if...
No... it didn't look as if he was going to smash me without my consent... it looked... as if...
--DON'T YOU DARE READ OUT LOUD STONE OCEAN -Help, they're going to kill meeeee.
--He IS indeed going to read stone ocean out loud, only for you -I hate them.
--And that's because you hurt his feelings and before you ask, no you can't leave. Do you have a problem with that? -Did he just do Jotaro'se voice to scare me?
But I am far more intelligent than... these lower lifeforms that love Stone ocean.
--I don't have any problem with that, I made an error and I'm sorry, I promise to never make fun of Riverdude's Chika Chika Dance again -I didn't actually mean that, but they don't have to know.
--Wait, did he just say sorry? Shuck said sorry? -I think JoJo song man was somewhat between scared, surprised in a good way and happy?
--Then we aren't going to torture him?
--Did you just say that Stone ocean is a torture?
--For him yes-
--DON'T YOU DARE SAY THAT AGAIN IN THIS HOUSE.
--BUT IT'S MY HOUSE, and I didn't even meant it like that...
This is what Stone ocean makes to people, see? It' the demon.
--I should have stayed with Kris... now I have to see you guys fighting over reading or not some... trash -Oh no, what have I said??? They're going to kill me! They are looking at me! I'm too young and amazing to die!
--What did you just say?... About Stone ocean?
--PLEASE DON'T KILL ME -Scrub opened the manga- SCRUB PLEASE DON'T READ IT
--Scrub... read it.
--It will be a pleasure...
Help me... they've read an ENTIRE manga of stone ocean, my brain cells are dying and I NEED them, I need them more than they do...
--Now, Shuck, have you understood that Stone ocean is good? Or do we have to read more to you -Scrub raised an eyebrow doing Jolyne's voice.
--I won't say I like stone ocean, but maybe I don't hate it THAT much -I was lying, of course, but they believed it, how wouldn't they? They love me in a not homo way.
--That's definitely a step from stage one, isn't it? -Riverdude was impressed, which means that they believe me. Perfect.
--I think it's bullshit, but I'm happy. However if I find out that it is indeed a lie he will be having nightmares with my Jolyne voice -That was cruel, even for him.
--So, guys, can I go now to my place as if this never happened?
--No. -I hate you Scrub.
--Then, what do you want to do with me? This is boring, and I don't want you to "torture" me anymore -It was pretty obvious that I wanted to go to my place and see how many hentai of me there is now.
--Don't you want to do the torture dance with us? -Riverdude, please don't tell me those things, I can't resist...
--Okey, but no homo -I put my hands up.
--Of course, no homo -Honestly I didn't thought Scrub would actually answer me.
--Yes, yes, whatever, no homo, is it really necessary to say no homo everytime we want to do something together -Riverdude asks stupid questions.
--It is, what if there is some crazy fan stalking us and she takes pictures of us doing something together and we didn't specify that it wasn't homo -This is why i'm far more intelligent than this lower lifeforms.
--Okey, you've got a point.
Of course I do.
And that means I'm not homo.
No homo bro.