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Meant to Be

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Meant to Be: Prologue

This is your captain speaking. We’ve just landed in Seattle, Washington. Local time is 2:47PM and the current weather is partly cloudy, current temperature is sixty-one degrees. If this is your first time to the area, enjoy your trip. Please remain seated until the seatbelt light goes off. 

 

Harvey looks over to Donna, noticing the odd expression on her face. She’s staring off into space, completely dazed, but her brow is furrowed like she’s thinking too hard about something. He takes her hand in his, asking, “Hey, you okay?”

 

Her hazel eyes shift over to his, her nod the only reply he receives. He gives her hand another squeeze, bringing it up to kiss her knuckles. 

 

First class passengers exit the plane first, and he has to pull her from her far away thoughts so they can get their carry on bags. 

 

She shakes her head as she stands, chuckling softly. “Sorry,” she shrugs. “I was lost in my head thinking about all these apartments we want to look at.”

 

Harvey smirks, telling her it’s okay. “We have a whole week, babe,” he reminds, “we have plenty of time.”

 

They make their way from the plane, bags thrown over their shoulders, and they head for baggage claim. They may only be in Seattle for a week, but that hadn’t stopped his wife from packing an assortment of shoes and dresses for each day, including wardrobe changes. Not that he’s any better. He hadn’t quite been able to get all his suits, plus leisure wear, into a carry on, so he’d checked a small bag as well. 

 

As they locate their luggage, Harvey hears a squealed, “There they are!” 

 

Donna’s head whips around, a gasp leaving her and she abandons her suitcase behind with him, rushing toward where Mike and Rachel stand. 

 

The brunette wraps her arms around Donna, both of them tearing up at the sight of one another. 

 

He scoffs in mirth, taking the handle of her luggage as well as his, and walking over to the group. Mike smirks at him when he approaches, making a quip about not realizing quitting the firm meant he was taking up a job as a bellboy. 

 

“Just being the good husband that I am,” he smirks, glancing over to his wife. 

 

She’s still wrapped in Rachel’s arms, both women lovingly stroking the back of each other’s heads, declaring how much they’ve missed each other. 

 

He can see a tear rolling down Donna’s cheek, and he can only assume there’s tears on Rachel’s as well. 

 

It’s sweet. He knows how much Donna has missed her friend, and this just solidifies their decision to move here. 

 

Rachel gasps dramatically, pulling away from Donna. Her hands slip down, intertwining with the redhead’s as she turns to face the men. “Husband!” She turns back to Donna with a beaming smile. “He’s your husband!

 

Donna laughs, looking over to him with love in her eyes. It’s a look she’s had since he proposed two weeks ago, and he can’t get enough of it. He knows he has the exact same expression on his face, too. 

 

Rachel picks up Donna’s left hand, bringing it closer to her face. She gushes over the sapphire and diamond ring, tears welling in her brown eyes once again as they stand there, in the middle of baggage claim, celebrating the newlyweds. “It’s gorgeous,” she exclaims to Harvey, looking to him with a proud grin. “You did good!”

 

Donna’s eyes soften when her friend looks back to her. She nods, affirming that he did a great job. “It was his grandmother's ring, and I love it.” 

 

The girls walk closer to him and Mike then, Donna reaching out to take her suitcase. “Sorry,” she giggles. 

 

He wraps his now free arm over her shoulder, pressing a quick kiss to her hairline. “Not a problem,” he assures, smiling dopily down at her. He removes his arm from around her, taking her free hand in his as they all walk outside. 

 

Mike leads them to the parking deck, talking animatedly the whole time about all the sights they needed to see while they were here and restaurants they should try. “Oh, and of course you guys need to come by the office and meet everyone!” 

 

Donna chuckles, telling him it’s definitely on the agenda. “Our little puppy is so excited to have us here,” she jokes, stage whispering loud enough that Mike still hears. 

 

“Ha, ha,” he mock-laughs, rolling his eyes. He then smiles, confirming that he is very happy they decided to move here. 

 

“You know we’re only here for a few days this time, right?” Donna asks, giving the blonde a skeptical look. 

 

He nods, saying that he does, but he claims he still wants them to experience the best while they’re here. 

 

The elevator dings and the doors open. Mike and Rachel climb in, Rachel taking Donna’s carry on bag for her. Stepping back, he gestures for Donna to get on before him. She smiles and steps in before he hops on. 

 

He takes her hand again, loving the way her ring feels against his skin. He makes a mental note to take Mike on an excursion to a jewelry store while they’re here to look at wedding bands while Rachel occupies Donna’s attention. They still have to get him a permanent one and return the band Donna’s friend got for them at the last minute, and he wants to get one for Donna that matches his grandmother’s ring.

 

He grins at the thought, hoping he can surprise her again like he did with the last ring. Leaning closer, he places a quick kiss to the side of her head. 

 

“Ugh,” Rachel scoffs playfully from behind them, “you’re so cute !” She laughs, unable to contain her joy over them finally being together. “You’re like… the same, but different.” 

 

They turn to face the couple, sharing a knowing smile. “ You’re the same,” she points between him and Donna, “but you’re… holding hands, and Harvey is actually smiling!” 

 

The doors open to the third level and they all walk out, Donna coming to his defense with, “He smiled before!” 

 

She reaches out, stroking his arm as her lips turn up sweetly at him. 

 

Rachel chuckles, saying, “Yeah, at you, but no one else!” 

 

Harvey grins at their friends, knowing Rachel is mostly right. Smiles weren’t too often found working in the office. He always had to be the hardass boss. He was the best fucking closer the city had ever seen; he couldn’t be seen as soft or playful. He always had a million problems on his shoulders as well, just one of the reasons deciding to leave was so simple. After decades of feeling weighed down by chaos and scandal, he just wanted to be happy. “Well no one else deserved a smile at work,” he insists with a smug smirk. 

 

“Aw, come on,” Mike pleads, stopping in front of his SUV as he unlocks it with the remote. “Pretty sure I got a smile before.” 

 

The tailgate lifts open, and Mike takes his bag from him, placing it inside. “Must’ve been gas or something,” Harvey retorts dryly, causing Rachel and Donna to snort. He then reaches for Donna’s suitcase, putting it next to his in the trunk. 

 

He opens the car door for her, letting her climb into the backseat with Rachel. As he buckles into the passenger seat, he can hear the girls talking to themselves about everything they’ll get to do again living in the same city. 

 

They pull onto the freeway, Mike telling Harvey about the realtor he found for them and how he’d already helped her scope out some places not too far from their home. 

 

He nods, wanting to make a comeback about not wanting to work and live close to him, but he refrains, knowing it’ll actually be nice to live close to a familiar face until they get use to Seattle. 

 

“Harvey is so… touchy feely as a husband,” Rachel whispers to Donna, but it’s just loud enough for them all to hear since his and Mike’s conversation had just died out. 

 

He glances over his shoulder, and Rachel’s eyes widen comically. “But… well, I mean… it’s adorable!”

 

He looks across to Donna, their grins matching one another’s. She reaches out, tapping him on the nose as she announces, “He’s a big sap, too!”

 

“Am not,” he defends, turning back in his seat. 

 

Mike guffaws, adding, “Its true, Rach. I watched him propose and heard his wedding vows. He’s a big ol’ softy down to his core.”

 

Donna reaches around the headrest, mussing his hair up. She and Mike share a laugh, and all he can do is try to hide his embarrassed grin from the rest of the car, knowing they’re completely right. When it comes to his love for Donna, he’s secretly, in the confines of their home, the biggest romantic there is (besides Louis). 

 

He demands that the subject be changed in his typical, authoritative tone he always used in the office, causing the other passengers to smirk, a barely audible chuckle reverberating throughout the car. For the rest of the ride to the Ross’ apartment, they discuss their plans for the next week–house hunting, checking out the different neighborhoods and what all there is to do in town, going to the firm to meet their new co-workers, and per Donna’s request, trying to peek in on some community theatres that she might be able to get involved with.

 

They have a lot to get done, knowing they need to get back to New York to pack some more items away and spend time with baby Lucy before he whisks her off on a week long honeymoon to Paris. After their honeymoon, it will be a non-stop race to get everything settled before the big move. 

 

Everything lately has been a whirlwind, one that has exhilarated Harvey, keeping his adrenaline pumping. The vacation will be nice, a chance to relax and spend uninterrupted time with Donna, but after that they’ll have to get their apartments packed, finalize the lease on both of them, get things scored away with the movers, and prepare to move to Seattle for the time being. He also wants to take Donna back to Boston to visit Marcus, as well as bidding goodbye to Lily and Gordon’s tombstones one more time until they can get back over to the East coast for a visit.

 

It will be busy, the next two months will be jam packed, but it’ll all be worth it knowing the end result will be moving across the country with his wife by his side. 

 

{****************************}

 

“This first apartment,” the realtor, Maggie, says, turning the key inside the lock and opening the door, “is four bedrooms, two and a half bath–”

 

She rambles out the stats, giving them the square footage and facts about the neighborhood, but all Donna hears is the number of bedrooms. 

 

“Four bedrooms?” she asks in surprise, looking between Harvey and Maggie. “I thought we were only looking at three bedroom places.”

 

They’d agreed on a number late one night as they sat down together and decided what features they wanted in a home. Their styles were different, his apartment in New York being dark and stuffy, while hers was light and more comfortable. She’d spent the last few months trying to warm his apartment up and make it more them , but she could never quite accomplish it with all the dark furniture. 

 

She sees the older woman’s green eyes glance to Harvey, so she looks to her husband as well. He’s got a smirk on his face, the one he wears when he’s trying to pull one over on her (which rarely happens, marriage proposal aside). “I think four might be more… practical,” he suggests with an easy lift of one shoulder, his smirk melting into a soft smile. 

 

It takes her a moment, recounting the rooms they’d agreed on needing–their bedroom, a guest room, and an office–when she realizes what he intends the fourth room to be. A nursery

 

Her lips turn up on the ends, eyes growing soft and a bit misty. Her teeth sink into her bottom lip, nodding in silent agreement as she tries to contain the excited smile blooming on her face. They’ve talked about kids before, briefly, not knowing when they wanted to start trying, just knowing at least one kid was what they both wanted. 

 

She walks over to him, wrapping her arm around his elbow and they continue walking through the oversized apartment. 

 

It’s a beautiful place, the large windows provide a beautiful view of the city. She can see the space needle off to the left, along with the other skyscrapers. It gives her a sense of home, knowing she’ll miss seeing the New York skyline each night. 

 

The apartment is huge, each bedroom far larger than she was planning for. But, she supposes, the money they each had saved runs a lot further in Seattle than it would in the Big Apple. Their apartments back home were already large, especially Harvey’s, so it’s not so different, but the layout and lighter paint color makes the rooms look more open. 

 

It’s beautiful, but she’s not sure this is the one for them. “I don’t really like how the kitchen is closed off from the living room,” she informs Maggie. 

 

The woman smiles, nodding as she informs them that the next one on her list is a more open concept so it might tick off a few more boxes on their wish lists. “And it’s $10,000 less than this one!”

 

Harvey chuckles, saying that’s always a good thing. He smiles over at her, and her jittery stomach settles a bit. 

 

She’s nervous, but she can’t place why. It’s a big move, and seeing this apartment makes her realize that this is actually happening. 

 

It’s all a bit… overwhelming. But it will be okay, she reminds herself repeatedly. It will be worth it. They need a break from New York, from the stress and fast paced chaos that the firm was giving them lately. Working with Mike and Rachel will be good, great even. It will just take some getting used to. 

 

Donna looks around the apartment once more as they come back into the living room. She walks over to the windows, scanning her eyes over the city view again. She takes a deep breath, pushing down the tears threatening to come up. 

 

Harvey comes to stand beside her, his hand reaching down for hers. He gives it a squeeze, pulling her away from the view. She looks at him, and he’s smiling so brightly. He’s so excited to be doing this – to be moving and looking at apartments. He lives for the rush of fast paced changes. His smile brings her a semblance of peace, and she grins back at him. 

 

“You ready to go see the next one?” he asks, leading her toward the entryway. 

 

She nods, smiling at their realtor, and exclaiming, “Let’s go!”

 

They make their way down the thirty-two floors, her stomach knotting tighter the closer they get to the ground. Maggie gives them the stats of the next apartment, promising Donna she’ll like this one much more. 

 

Smiling uneasily, all she can do is nod and hope above all else that this is the right move after all. 

 

{*****************************}

 

That night, after a long afternoon of house hunting and then dinner with their friends, Harvey settles himself on the edge of the bed. 

 

They’re staying with Mike and Rachel for the week. He’d insisted they could get a hotel, but Donna had been so excited to see Rachel that staying with them only made sense. It would give the girls more time to catch up and just be together after so long of being apart. 

 

Their apartment was nice. It had a lot of the features he and Donna were looking for, and Mike had joked at dinner that they should move into their building. 

 

He smiles at the thought, knowing how much his new wife would love that (and him, too, if he’s being honest). The apartments they looked at today were beautiful, though. The last one had most of what they wanted – it had the open concept, the kitchen and bathrooms had stainless steel fixtures, which was nice, a large laundry room, even larger closets (a must have on both of their parts), and the perfect amount and sized bedrooms. 

 

Standing from the bed, he grabs his toothbrush and paste from his luggage. Donna has been in the shower for a while now, but he figures he’ll go in anyway to finish getting ready for bed. 

 

Walking to the next room over, he knocks on the wooden door, a soft, “Donna?” coming from him. 

 

He pushes the door open, informing her, “I just need to brush my teeth.”

 

She gives him a sound of acknowledgement, somewhere between a hum and a jumbled okay . He sets the toothpaste down, rambling to her about the apartments and condos they looked at today. He’s telling her how much he liked the last one when he realizes she hasn’t said much. He’s just put paste onto his toothbrush, about to wet it, but he hears her sniffle through the stream of water hitting the tile. 

 

Harvey’s brows cinch together, turning the sink off. “Donna?” He gets no reply, just another sniffle. “Are you okay?” 

 

He gingerly raps his knuckles against the shower curtain, letting her know he was there. He peels back the curtain, and the sight before him breaks his heart. His wife is sitting there, back against the tiled wall, her knees bent up and the water pouring down against her feet. There are tears falling silently down her cheeks and without thought, he strips his black t-shirt and boxers off, climbing in to seek her out. 

 

He thanks the heavens above that Mike’s guest bathroom has a large enough shower that they can both fit as he sinks down beside her, reaching out for her. Her arms are folded over her bent up knees, head buried in them now. “Donna…”

 

She shakes her head, turning it and trailing her eyes over to him. “I’m okay,” she whispers. 

 

He gives her an unbelieving look, saying she’s clearly not and asks again what’s wrong. 

 

“It’s just… a lot, you know?” she stammers, clearing her throat. He can tell she’s holding back more tears than she’s letting out and it worries him. He’s never really seen her cry… not like this. 

 

Sure, he’s seen her distraught, upset over things at work or with her family. But this… it’s a type of sadness he’s never seen from her. He doesn’t know what to do. Every fiber of his being is screaming to comfort her. She’s wound against herself so tightly, though, that he can’t get in. 

 

He just nods at her question, not truly understanding what she’s talking about but not wanting to halt her words, wishing she could get it all out. 

 

She sighs, sad eyes looking up at him. More of the tears she’s been holding back slip from her eyes, and she blinks rapidly. She brings a hand up, wiping furiously at her cheeks, trying to clear the tears away. 

 

“It’s just a lot,” she repeats, almost to herself as she nods and stares out into the distance in front of her, a breathy sob leaving her. He settles next to her, one hand reaching out to stroke her forearm. 

 

Donna’s eyes fall back on his, and he gives her a look of Tell me so I can help . Her lips twist into a sad smile, taking a deep breath. “The last six months have been…” she sighs deeply again, adding, “busy.”

 

He nods, and she nods slowly along with him. He knows a lot has changed, but he loves the fast paced changes. Likes being on the edge, but he knows she’s not always like that. 

 

“Yeah,” he breathes in sympathy. “A lot has happened.”

 

She scoffs out a wet chuckle, her bottom lip trembling. Sucking in a shaky breath, she rubs her lips together as more tears start to fall. “Yeah,” she cries, a louder sob escaping her lips. 

 

Mike and Rachel are already tucked away into their bedroom on the other side of the apartment for the night, and he’s thankful for it when she starts to cry harder. 

 

“I mean…” she trails off, looking up to the ceiling as she shakes her head. She looks back to him and recounts, “in the last six months, my best friend whom I’ve been in love with for… years… finally realizes he loves me too.” They both laugh quietly, before she continues on a shaky breath. “We start dating, I practically move out of my apartment and into yours, everything with work,” her eyes water, more tears slipping free as she looks to him with sad, gentle eyes, “your mom.” 

 

He nods, holding back his own tears at the thought. 

 

She continues to ramble, stating, “you propose and we get married all on the same day, we decide to leave the firm, and are now planning to move from the city we’ve lived in most of our lives and across the entire country!” She brings a hand up, wiping away the tears again. She takes a shuddering breath, exhaling slowly as her cheeks puff out. 

 

He can see she’s trying to calm herself down, the last bit of her speech overwhelming her. She’s crying openly now, and all he can do is wrap his arms around her, letting her cry into his shoulder as the hot water runs a bit colder against their legs. 

 

He reaches over, turning the knob to heat up a few degrees, then winds his arm back around her. He shushes into her hair, kissing the top of her head. He murmurs comforts of, “I know,” and, “It is a lot,” into her hair. 

 

She nods, trying to rein her tears back in. 

 

He worries however, knowing he loves the thrill of moving quickly, but fearful that it’s all been too much too soon for her. 

 

Harvey pulls back, looking down into her eyes with concern. “Did we... move too fast?”

 

Her eyebrows pinch together, almost looking guilty over his question, and she sits up straighter. “What?!” She starts to cry again, shaking her head. “No. No, no, no.” She sniffles, face crumpling with her emotions. “I didn’t mean to make you feel that way. I love you,” she says, eyes widening as she calms her tears. “You’re my husband .”

 

They grin at one another softly and he nods. He’s not used to seeing her get this upset, never seen her cry so hard like this, and he wants to know how to fix it. 

 

“Everything is just happening really quickly,” she informs him around a thick lump in her throat. “It’s all great and wonderful things,” she smiles again, “it’s just… all at once and in a short amount of time.” 

 

He nods again when she says she just hasn’t had time to process everything. “Looking at apartments today just overwhelmed me,” she admits, her tears finally dissipating. “I just…” she huffs, more to herself than anything as more tears form in her eyes. “I dreamt about being with you for so long that this all feels like a dream.” 

 

Tears fall as she looks to him, confessing, “I don’t want to wake up one day and realize it’s all just been pretend.” 

 

His brows scrunch in sympathy and his head tilts to the side, his hand reaching out to stroke her shin in comfort. “It’s not a dream, Donna,” he promises. “This is our reality now. And I, for one, am glad this isn’t just a dream. I would never want to wake up if it was.” 

 

“God, you really are a sap sometimes,” she giggles through her tears, trying to calm herself down. She moans at herself, reeling in her emotions, adding, “But you’re my sap.”

 

They laugh, and he leans in, their noses bumping against one another’s. 

 

He scoots beside her, shoulders pressing together. He kisses her cheek, then reaches out for her hand still resting on her bent up knee. He links his fingers with hers, bringing them back to his lips to kiss the top of her hand. “It is a lot though, you’re right,” he agrees, apologizing that he didn’t think about how fast paced it all was since he lives for stuff like that. 

 

She chuckles, leaning her head against his shoulder, mumbling, “I know you do.”

 

He never thought about how fast everything was moving because once he realized he was supposed to be with her, it just made sense to rush to her and start their lives together. Things with the firm, and Faye, and Samantha, and his mom… fuck, it was a lot. He’d been distracted with his happiness that he hadn’t really slowed down to realize what all had actually gone on around them. He tells her all of this, and she nods, declaring she’s just happy he didn’t think twice about coming over to her apartment so many months ago.

 

They laugh together again, the tears finally all dried up. They sit there, enjoying the peaceful moment as the water warms them up. Donna says they need to decide what furniture to have sent over in the move and what they’ll just sell in New York. “I really don’t want to sleep on that mattress of yours for the rest of my life,” she confesses with a smirk. “And your bedroom furniture is pretty ugly, too.” 

 

She snickers at his horrified face, claiming in the most adorable way that it’s so dark and manly. 

 

“Why don’t we buy all new furniture here?” he suggests, knowing she’s always hated his bedroom furniture… and his living room set, too. 

 

She smiles, confirming that’s a great idea. “Maybe I can get you to agree to furniture that isn’t black or brown.” 

 

He grins, nudging her shoulder with his. He suggests that they can go test out couches one day while they’re here, and when they get home, they can go through both apartments and decide what to keep. 

 

“Oh, my bedroom set is definitely coming with us,” she states. He gives her a look and her eyebrows raise, that flabbergasted look she always gets when she argues her point in a matter, mouth agape and eyes bright. “It’s so pretty! Especially my dresser.”

 

Chuckling, he nods, conceding that it can go in their new guest room so they can pick out a set for their bedroom together. 

 

Donna looks at him then, and it’s almost as if he can read her mind for once, because he just knows she’s impressed with how good of a husband he’s being. She makes another joke about his husband skills, and he chortles at how right he’d been. 

 

“Come on,” he pecks her lips, smiling. “This water is getting cold. Let’s get out and go to bed.”

 

They both stand, letting the luke warm water wash over their bodies one more time before Harvey reaches down to turn it off. 

 

Wrapping up in a pair of fluffy towels, they smile at each other once more. “Hey,” he whispers into her hair, placing a gentle kiss to her damp, red tresses. “I love you.”

 

Donna smiles, eyes growing heavy as she leans her head against his chest. She thanks him for calming her down and talking through her worries, but all he can do is shrug, telling her it was nothing. “What are husbands for?” he jokes, opening the door and letting her go out first. 

 

They make their way next door, changing into pajamas and spending the rest of the night tangled in each other’s arms. 

 

{********************************}

 

“What about this one?” Harvey asks, looking toward her with excited eyes. “It’s nice!”

 

She exhales a giggle, walking over to where he’s testing out mattresses. They’d agreed last night, after her break down, to pick out bedroom furniture together. It was exciting – a very… married couple thing to do, and it made Donna grin. 

 

They’ve been at the store for over an hour, looking around at lamps, area rugs, and other home decor. Now they’re trying out different mattresses in hopes of finding one they can both agree on. She’s discovered that he’s prone to like the more rigid ones while she prefers a bit of downy softness in her mattresses. 

 

“It’s nice,” she agrees hesitantly as she settles onto the firm mattress beside him. “A little hard, though.”

 

Harvey’s smile turns into a wolfish grin as he turns to face her, murmuring hoarsely, “I thought you liked hard things in the bedroom.”

 

Her hazel eyes widen, chortling as she swats at his chest, rolling away from him with a muttered, “You’re an idiot.” 

 

They laugh at themselves, and Donna stands, making her way to the next mattress. It’s still a king size, but it’s more comfortable than the last. It’s a nice combination of firm and soft, and she thinks it’ll be perfect for them. “Now this ,” she claims, propping herself up onto her elbows and looking over to him lying on the next bed, “is the mattress for us.”

 

Harvey rolls his eyes good naturedly, saying he’s never going to win this argument and get the firm bed. She states proudly that he is right, causing him to chuckle. “I’m Donna, and I know this is the perfect bed.”

 

Laying down, a content moan escapes him. He exhales slowly, trailing his eyes over to where she’s still propped up, looking down at him beside her with a knowing grin on her face. “Okay,” he concedes, “you’re right. This one is perfect.”

 

“I’m sorry,” she drawls, slowly bringing a hand up to cup her ear, “I’m what?”

 

Shaking his head, he tugs at her arm, making her stumble down beside him on the bed. They lay there, hands intertwined between their bodies, staring up at the ceiling. “This is nice,” he confirms.

 

Donna looks over to him, nodding in agreement. “Looks like we just made our first big purchase as a married couple.”

 

A pleased smile forms on his lips as he sits up. She joins him, reaching up to fix her hair now that she’s not pressed against the mattress. Harvey leans over, pecking her lips quickly before pulling apart. 

 

“Don’t let us interrupt,” Mike jests with a chuckle as he and Rachel make their way toward them. “Did you guys find a mattress?”

 

The couple nods, Donna waving her hand around at the one they are still sitting on. Mike plops down behind her, his head landing behind Harvey. He sighs dramatically, announcing that it is indeed a nice mattress. 

 

Mike pokes Harvey in the back, ribbing him about being a cute little old man picking out mattresses with his wife. Harvey turns, making a comment about not being too old to kick his ass, and the boys are lost, joking and playing around like school boys.

 

Donna rolls her eyes, standing and looping her arm with Rachel’s. “Come on,” she calls, smiling at her friend. “Let’s leave the frat boys here and go test out some couches.”

 

Harvey straightens up at that, fixing the collar of his polo and clearing his throat. Mike sits up as well, feeling properly chastised, and Rachel giggles, waving goodbye to her husband as the women make their way to the other side of the store.

 

The girls sink down into a large, charcoal gray sofa. It’s nice, but Donna isn’t sure if Harvey will like not having a leather couch. “At least it’s closer to black than your white one back home,” Rachel shrugs, leaning her head against her arm that is bent on the back of the couch. 

 

Donna smiles, knowing her husband prefers the darker colors. “I’m trying to avoid all the dark decor like he has now, so this might be a nice compromise,” she suggests. “As long as I can get him to agree on a lighter color rug and accessories.”

 

“I have a feeling you’ll be able to get him to agree to anything .” Rachel raises her eyebrows, wiggling them suggestively. 

 

Donna chuckles, knowing her friend wants all the details of their sex life. She shakes her head, telling Rachel she’s not going to be getting those details, and Rachel’s mouth falls open. “Why not?! You just got married, the sex is bound to be mind blowing,” she says, leaning closer to Donna so only they can hear their conversation. “Especially after waiting so long to get together.”

 

Donna’s mind wanders then, remembering their wedding day. 

 

They left soon after their perfect first dance as husband and wife, both wanting to get to the hospital to see Louis. 

 

Harvey takes her hand, hopping into the limo Louis had left behind at the wedding venue. He tells the driver where to go before climbing into the backseat and pulling her with him.

 

She giggles happily, sighing in content as she snuggles into his side. Her hand lands against his chest, rubbing soft patterns. Harvey leans down, pressing his lips to hers. He goes to pull away, but she nips at his bottom lip, wordlessly begging him to kiss her again. He does, and fuck, is it good. His lips attach to hers, more passionately this time, and she responds with a moan. Her hand that’s on his chest slides around to his shoulder as she moves her body, straddling his waist.

 

“Mm, Donna,” he groans in the small space between their lips. “Fuck.”

 

She grins into his lips, pressing another kiss there. Moaning again, both her hands slide into his hair, gripping at the back of his head. God, she loves this man. She can’t believe he blindsided her with a proposal and a wedding all in the same day. Sure, she knew he was going to propose at some point, they’d talked about spending their lives together forever, but today? She never saw it coming… something Donna Paulsen is not used to. 

 

His hands find purchase on her hips, thumbs caressing the silky fabric of her black dress. Now more than ever, she’s thankful she chose to wear a dress that didn’t hug all her curves like she normally does; she’s able to move, and writhe, and grind, against her husband. Her husband. Fuck. That sounds so good. “You’re my husband,” she breathes, lips trailing from his lips to his jaw and down to his neck, sucking at his pulse point. 

 

He moans, and she can just imagine his eyes rolling to the back of his head. She can feel his hardness between her thighs, and she reaches between them, moving her dress out of the way. Donna’s hand rubs at his member, grinning when it pulls a coarse grunt from the back of his throat. 

 

One of his hands leaves her waist, joining hers between their bodies. “So gorgeous,” he murmurs, lips trailing a wet path across her collar bone. He stops at the corner of her shoulder, teeth biting at her freckled skin. 

 

“Mmm,” she moans, head tilting back as the sensation of his teeth and his fingers combine to make every fiber of her being dance with an electric feeling. The hairs on her arms stand on end as goosebumps rise on her skin. “Harvey, touch me.”

 

He says something about that not being a problem as his fingers continue to skim across the edge of her black, lace thong. He dips a finger beneath the thin fabric, running along her slit. She’s already so wet, and he moans, telling her, “You’re so wet for me.”

 

She nods frantically, begging him to touch her deeper. He obliges, her hand going slack against his still clothed cock for a moment as his finger sinks deeper into her core and he adds a second one. 

 

Bringing a hand up to cover her mouth, she works her other to undo his zipper, allowing his hardness to spring free. He moans in pleasure, head falling to the back of the seat. 

 

She glances over her shoulder, remembering there is another person in the limo, but to her relief, the partition is securely fastened up and it tinted the blackest shade it could be. 

 

“Stop,” she pants, kissing his jaw once more. She drags her lips up to his ear, sucking on his lobe before whispering hotly, “I want you to fuck me in this car.”

 

His hands grip her waist, hoisting her up enough to reposition themselves so he can slip his cock inside of her. He looks to her, silently asking if this is what she definitely wants, and as she begins to grind her hips, he gets his answer. 

 

She rides his cock, his one hand rubbing pressured circles on her clit, while his other tangles in her long, strawberry blonde hair. He tugs her head back a touch, lips sucking at her neck and up to her lips. 

 

Their lips meet once more, tongues seeking entrance. She’s close already, the whole day having been one turn on after the other.

 

His vows–how he told her that she’d changed his life forever–the way he’d taken her hand after the ceremony, claiming he wanted to dance with ‘his wife’, their dance to the most appropriate song ever for their lives, the way he held her close, whispering sweet words of a hopeful future into her ear. It was all… magical. It was the most beautiful night of her life, and she’s wanted to celebrate in this way, just them entwined together, since he slipped down onto one knee, asking her to spend forever with him.

 

She cries out at the memory combined with the way his cock is pulsing into her, one frenzied thrust at a time. “I’m cl-close, Harvey,” she stammers, tightening her grip in his hair. 

 

It’ll be messed up, and she needs to remember to have them both fix their appearances before going into the hospital, but she doesn’t give a fuck right now. All she wants to do is ride her husband until they’re both completely spent. 

 

“Mm,” he replies, pressing his lips to her neck, trying to silence himself. “Me too.”

 

His thumb presses more firmly to her clit, working to even closer to her edge. She moans, teeth biting at her bottom lip, knowing that the driver’s partition may be closed but it’s most likely not entirely sound proof. 

 

She grinds down against him harder, pulling a husky groan from the back of his throat. 

 

He thrusts one, two, three more times before she’s falling off the cliff and down into oblivion. She comes, her walls clenching around his cock. Whimpering into his neck, Donna laughs breathily, kissing his vein that’s protruding as he grows closer to his climax. 

 

Donna bucks her hips harder down onto him, her hand finally removing that bow tie she’d undone earlier, tossing it somewhere behind her. She dots kisses from his neck to his jaw. As she undoes the top four buttons of his dress shirt, she places soft pecks to his chest, her tongue dancing along his skin as he jerks up into her core.  

 

She leans back, body still convulsing from her orgasm, and moves against him, wanting to bring him to completion before they arrive at the hospital. Her hands sneak inside his shirt, nails scratching at the top of his chest and around to his back. She can feel his shoulder blades move against her hands as he squirms in delight. 

 

Smirking wickedly, she leans down again to his ear, sucking on that pulse point just below his lobe that always makes him putty in her hands. “You’re fucking your wife,” she rasps, causing him to lose it. 

 

He thrusts up into her, the sensation overwhelming as she still comes down from her high. He comes with her name on his lips, one hand on her waist while the other grips her hair. 

 

They stay there for a moment, letting both of their bodies calm down. After a few moments, she slips from his lap, readjusting her thong that’s been skewed to the side. 

 

Harvey shifts, tucking himself back into his boxers, and he smirks hungrily over at her. “That was…”

 

“I know,” she beams, hooded eyes staring back at him. “I love you.”

 

“I love you, too.”

 

They laugh, shaking their heads at how eager they’d been, Harvey confirming their marriage was off to a great start. She slides over, his arm draping over hers as he presses a light kiss to the top of her hair. 

 

As the limo comes to a stop, she sits up, informing him they need to fix their hair. She runs a hand through his, combing down the strands she’s messed up before running her fingers through her own. 

 

They straighten their clothes as they exit the car, bow tie long forgotten. The limo driver doesn’t make eye contact with either one, and the newlyweds smirk at one another, shrugging but making no attempt to apologize.

 

“I already told you about our first night together when you called me back that day,” Donna defends playfully. “Isn’t that enough?”

 

Rachel smirks, laughing out a breathy, Nope, before claiming she’ll get the wedding night details from her one way or another. “Might have to load you up on whiskey tonight,” she sniggers. 

 

Donna giggles along with her, changing the subject. She grows more serious, taking Rachel’s hand in hers. “I wish you could’ve been there,” she admits softly. “I’m sorry we didn’t wait.”

 

Her friend waves her off, eyes going soft as she agrees that it would’ve been nice to be there, but she’ll be at the official one whenever it happens. “It looked so beautiful,” Rachel replies, telling Donna that Mike took some pictures on his phone, along with a video of their first dance. 

 

They spend the next twenty minutes roaming from couch to couch, testing out each one and discussing which colors and materials they like best. 

 

Once their husbands join them, the girls show them which couches Donna likes best and get Harvey’s input. They don’t have to decide anything just yet, so after another ten minutes of testing out the couches she’d narrowed it down to, the four of them make their way from the store. 

 

They spend the rest of the day visiting the clinic and meeting their new co-workers, then retire to the Ross’ apartment where they order pizza (with yellow tomatoes on half for Donna) and waste the night away laughing with their friends.

 

{********************************}

 

Days later, as their trip winds to an end, Harvey suggests they all have one more dinner out together before he and Donna have to head back to New York.

 

They leave in the morning, and there’s one more thing he wants to do.

 

“I can’t believe you recorded this!” Donna squeals, pulling Mike’s phone closer. She’s watching their first dance, and Harvey can’t take his eyes off of her. She’s so beautiful, and seeing how happy that video makes her causes his stomach to flutter. 

 

God, he sounds like a teenage boy, but it’s true. Donna makes him happier than he’s ever been before. He’s so goddamn lucky that she stuck around all those years, waiting for him to realize what was right in front of him. 

 

He rubs his thumb over his opposite hand, feeling the metal against his skin. He glances down, brown eyes moving over to look at her left hand. That ring. Fuck, he loves seeing it on her finger. When he’d found it inside the envelope, it was like everything made sense. Harvey knew he wanted to propose to Donna, had told his mom as much on the phone during their last conversation. 

 

He sniffs, pulling the emotions back in as he thinks of Lily. Donna nudges his leg with hers, smiling softly at him when they lock eyes. She looks down at her ring, then back at him again, eyes soft as she smiles once more. That’s what he loves about her; she just gets him. There’s so much between them that doesn’t have to be said. It’s as if they can read each other’s minds, Donna especially. It’s a skill she’s always had, but with him… it’s different. It’s on a deeper level, and he cherishes it. 

 

“I still can’t get over how gorgeous this ring is,” Rachel beams, taking the red head’s hand in hers from across the table. 

 

Donna smiles sweetly, head tucking to the side. She agrees, telling Rachel how much she loves it. She’d told him the night of their wedding as they lay in bed, skin on skin with nothing but their rings on, that she loved that her ring wasn’t just a diamond. That sapphire made it unique, and Donna was nothing if not unique. She was one of a kind. 

 

Harvey looks to Mike, the men sharing a knowing smirk. Bingo. He was hoping that Rachel would bring her ring up sooner rather than later. 

 

“Speaking of rings,” Mike chuckles with a glint in his eyes as he taps Harvey’s ring finger. “We gotta get this bad boy returned and get you a permanent one.”

 

He grins subtly at his friend, thankful he’s always been so good at moving the conversation right where Harvey needed it to be. They’d come up with this scenario one afternoon while the girls were at lunch together. He’d had Mike take him to all the best jewelry stores in town, making his friend help him pick out the perfect wedding bands. The two of them had, like always, planned a con to get them to this very moment at dinner. It’s one of the reasons they worked so well together, always able to dupe the opposing side into admitting something to win them the case. 

 

“I guess I should fix that, huh?”

 

Mike shrugs, a nonchalant twitch of his lips as he lets out a noncommittal, Eh

 

Donna looks over to him, eyes narrowing in suspicion. “What are you…”

 

Before she can finish the question, he pulls out a small, black box from his jacket pocket. “I thought it was time we had some real wedding bands.”

 

Opening the box, he reveals a platinum band for him, similar to the one he’s been sporting, just a little thicker. And beside his new ring, sits a wedding band all for her. It’s thin, the same silver as her engagement ring, and covered in tiny diamonds. The rings are perfectly matched, just like he is with Donna.

 

Rachel gasps, hands coming to cover her mouth as Mike slips his arm around her shoulders. 

 

Harvey grins over to their friends, then moves his eyes back to look at his wife. She’s teary eyed and shaking her head at him, announcing, “This is the second time you’ve surprised me with a ring.” She giggles, disclosing that’s one thing she loves about him. No matter how Donna she is, he can still sometimes manage to surprise her. “But you’ve got a lot to live up to now every anniversary.”

 

They all laugh, and Harvey agrees, knowing he’ll be the first one to spoil his wife every year to celebrate their marriage. 

 

Donna leans over, pressing her lips to his. Her hand cups his cheek, and he can feel her smiling into the embrace. 

 

Breaking apart, he slips her engagement ring off, putting the wedding band on first before sliding the larger one back into its rightful place. 

 

He removes his loaned wedding ring, handing it to Donna for safe keeping, knowing she’ll have to return it to her friend when they get back home. It’s the same guy that apparently can get her anything–dresses delivered to the office, phone numbers of long lost clients, and now, obviously, wedding bands on short notice. He’s not sure where she found this friend, but he’s thankful nonetheless.

 

Donna takes his new wedding band, smiling with tears shining in her eyes as she places it on his finger. It goes on much smoother than the one he’d been borrowing, and he’s glad he tried it on several times in the store. 

 

Rachel is crying now, while Mike nods in approval. 

 

“Come on,” Harvey snorts, standing from the table. He checks that his credit card is back in his wallet as the rest of their party stands. Donna slips her hand into his, and he gives it a squeeze.  “Let’s get out of here.”

 

He kisses her one more time, breaking apart with a chortle when he hears Mike exclaim, “Bet you wish you’d gotten a hotel room now!”

 

They make their way from the restaurant, completely content to be wrapped in each other’s arms, and in this moment, Harvey is reminded of Donna’s vows when she confessed to how happy he makes her. 

 

It’s a sentiment he hopes, knows, he’ll never lose. He wants to spend the rest of his life making her feel loved and appreciated.

 

{********************************}

 

The week had come and gone, quicker than Donna was willing to admit. After her breakdown in the shower their first night in town, things had completely changed. Once her tears had fallen and dried, comforted by Harvey’s reassurances, she was able to breathe again. 

 

It was like she just needed to get it all out, talk about the whirlwind that their life has been lately, cry, even yell a little, and then the weight could be lifted from her chest. 

 

They spent the rest of the week scoping out potential apartments, and each night, they kept agreeing that one of the ones from the first day was still their favorite. They had narrowed down their choices to that one and three others, promising Maggie they would look over the pictures they took as well as the listings of each property online when they got home. They would make a decision before heading to Paris so the realtor could get the ball rolling with their offer.

 

“I can’t believe you have to leave,” Rachel laments with tears in her eyes. She wraps her arms around Donna’s shoulders, pulling her into a tight embrace.

 

Donna smiles, winding her arms around her best friend as well. She feels Rachel’s emotions coming off of her in waves, affecting her as well. They both tear up, and as she pulls back, she spies the guys rolling their eyes at one another.

 

Laughing, she rolls her eyes right back at them, reminding Rachel they’d be back for good in a few short weeks. She takes a deep breath, confident as she can be about the move, but still a little apprehensive simply due to it being such a big change. She was never very good with change, one of the reasons she stayed at the law firm for so long as Harvey’s secretary. 

 

“Rach,” Mike calls, walking toward them. “They’ve got to go check their bags in.”

 

Rachel giggles, nodding and looking back to Donna. Her shoulders lift in tandem with her eyebrows, giving Donna a content smile. “I’ll see you in a few weeks!”

 

They hug once more, Donna’s eyes misting over. She snickers, shaking her head at the ridiculousness of themselves. 

 

They’d spent the week staying up late, while the guys drank and talked business, discussing Donna and Harvey’s wedding night with Rachel still trying to get all the sordid details even after their talk at the furniture store. Donna, of course, was tight lipped, wanting to keep the amazing skills of her husband all to herself. She’d given Rachel a few details, letting her friend know that things were working in all departments and she was completely satisfied. Giggling like school girls, they’d also talked about the upcoming wedding they needed to plan for their friends and family. She had told Rachel that they wanted to wait a while, get settled in their new home, give Lucy some time to grow a bit so she could be the most adorable flower girl ever, and let them figure out life as a married couple. 

 

Their honeymoon was next week and after that they’d pack everything up. It was exciting, she can admit that now, and she knows deep down this move might not be forever, but they need a change for the moment. They need to slow down a little and let Harvey help the good guys for a change, something he is very excited about doing, which just makes her love him even more. Not that life would completely slow down, they are still them after all. Work just wouldn’t consume their entire life; they’d be able to work normal hours, her still running the new office as COO and him being the best closer Seattle has ever seen. It will be nice, however, having time to actually focus on their personal lives, enjoy activities like theatre, yoga, boxing, and date nights (which now sometimes can include the Ross’, which she’s thrilled about). And who knows? Maybe that nursery Harvey planned for while house hunting will be put to good use sooner rather than later. That’d be an adventure in and of itself. 

 

She smiles, thinking of all the possibilities their life together holds now, unsure of what their future may entail, but excited to experience it with her husband by her side. 

 

Harvey comes over then, handing her the carry on bag she’d brought for the trip. She kisses his cheek, slinging the bag across her shoulder and taking his hand in hers. Looking down at their new wedding bands, she beams, still unable to believe this is her reality now.

 

“Call me when you get back from Paris,” Rachel begs, smiling brightly as Mike wraps his arm around her. “I want to hear all about it!”

 

Nodding, Donna promises she will. Stepping away from Harvey, she goes to hug her friend one more time as he does the same to Mike. They switch, Donna hugging Mike tightly and Harvey saying goodbye to Rachel. They talk and laugh together for a few more minutes, then finally Harvey states that it’s time to go.

 

Donna takes his hand once more, preparing to walk to security. “See ya back in Seattle!” Mike calls and she grins, looking up toward Harvey. Her emotions may be all over the place from the fast pace changes in their lives lately, but this week was good for her, for them. It gave her a chance to slow down and enjoy this new stage of life with her husband by her side. She’d checked out theatres she could join near the apartments they liked best, they were able to meet everyone at Ross & Ross Associates, and she was able to get a feeling of what life in Seattle would be like. 

 

It’ll be different, being able to leave work at a decent time, not always being overwhelmed with cases, but, she thinks, that might just be the best change for them yet. 

 

This cross country move may prove to be the greatest decision the Paulsen-Specters have made together, and she truly feels like this is where they’re meant to be.

{************************}

Like I said up at the top, I have plans to turn this into a multi-chapter fic, so this chapter was more to set some things up that are going to happen later on. Not sure how many chapters yet, but it’s going to be fluffy, then angsty, but of course it will all end with a happy ending (how could I not?? lol). Let me know if you’d be interested in me continuing this! 

Please review :) 

Chapter Text

 

Chapter two:

The move to Seattle had been smoother than Donna was expecting. Her fears during their trip out there a few months ago seemed silly now.

She and Harvey have been in their new town for three months, and she loves it. They'd ended up going with one of the apartments they'd seen on their initial trip. It has a nice, open floor plan. She can be sitting in the living room while keeping an eye on Harvey in the kitchen as he (adorably) tries to impress her with his culinary skills. The four bedrooms and the office are down a long hallway, and each bedroom has carpet in it as opposed to the beautiful, gray wooden floors the rest of the apartment possesses. It's nice, not having hardwood in the bedrooms, because it is warmer on their feet, and the frequent rain Seattle receives gives the city a slight chill in the mornings so the carpet is a pleasant change from the cold hardwood of Harvey's former New York condo.

The kitchen has gray cabinets and a white tiled backsplash, giving it a lovely balance between Donna's light and airy style and Harvey's preference for darker colors. He's warmed up over the last few months, though, to the lighter colors, seeing that it made the living space appear larger than it already was. She'd caved and agreed on black steel barstools to give it a manlier touch. She has to admit, however, that it's created a nice look in the apartment.

Mike and Rachel were, of course, helpful in getting everything moved into the new place. She had been able to sell all of her furniture back in New York, except her bedroom set that they'd agreed to fly over. Harvey sold his furniture as well, save for his desk that now resided in the home office. They'd packed up the trinkets and other items they wanted to take with them, all their belongings that meant the world to each of them, but they'd bought the big pieces of furniture once they landed back in Washington.

Harvey and Mike had picked up the couch and loveseat Donna had liked best, settling it into their new living room, while she and Rachel had the furniture store deliver and set up their new bed. The couches were a dark gray, contrasting nicely with the white walls and light gray flooring. She's picked up some black accent pieces for the built in entertainment center shelves, along with some teal and yellow ones as well.

Donna had been convinced to have Harvey's headboard and bed frame shipped over, despite wanting a new one. He'd swayed her vote in his direction with perfectly placed kisses and those puppy dog eyes she couldn't resist. Harvey had assured her that if they put the mattress they'd fallen in love with during their first visit to the city in place of his old one, she could decorate the rest of the bedroom to however she saw fit. She had to admit that his bed frame wasn't ugly, it matched their gray color scheme, it was just the rest of his bedroom furniture back in New York that was so terrible. But once she heard she could have free reign to decorate the bedroom, and get rid of that god awful painting of a red hallway, she was completely on board with the project.

Sighing, Donna looks around the home office after straightening Lily's painting. They'd hung it on the wall right across from Harvey's desk. It was a little piece of home, and he told her it made him feel more relaxed when work was getting to be too much. The painting of him watching his mom create the duck hung on the opposite wall behind his desk.

She walks out of the office and into the living room, looking around at the progress they'd made over the last few months. It was nearly complete, but there were still just a few finishing touches Donna wanted to put on it to make this apartment feel like a home.

"Hey, babe," he greets, walking through the front door.

Smiling, Donna walks over to him, pecking a kiss to his lips. Harvey sets his keys down on the marble kitchen island, peering across into the living room with narrowed eyes. "Did you move some things around again?"

Donna smirks, giving him a knowing look. "I just didn't like where the love seat was."

Harvey chuckles, shaking his head at her.

She's been doing this the last few days–coming home from work and rearranging things in the apartment. She wants everything to be perfect, wants it to feel just right for them.

He asks her if she's ordered dinner yet, and she says no, telling him she wanted to wait on him. "Did you want pizza or Thai?" she asks, walking into the living room and plopping onto the charcoal gray couch.

He loosens his tie, joining her. He flops onto the cushion beside her with a grunt, tossing his tie onto the coffee table in front of them as he stretches his legs out, crossing one ankle over the other atop the table. Harvey shrugs, saying it doesn't matter.

Looking over at him, Donna runs a hand through his hair, scratching lightly at the nape of his neck. She gazes at him, noticing how tired he looks. "You okay?"

He nods, telling her that he just had a long day. "That case Mike gave me the other day, the class action against the oil company, is kicking my ass."

Harvey had told her many times since he really got into a groove at work how much he truly enjoyed helping the good guys, the underdogs. He was especially enjoying this case because they are at the forefront of a new area of law that can have huge ramifications and change the landscape of environmental litigation. It's a challenge because there are no precedents to rely on, and he has to string together law from other areas to make the company pay for their contribution to global warming.

Her lips twist before she encourages him, "You'll figure it out. You always do."

They smile at each other, Harvey leaning in to kiss her lips.

"Why don't I order some pizza while you go shower off, hm?" she raises her eyebrows, knowing he needs to relax.

He nods, standing with a satisfied groan and begging her to only get her yellow tomatoes on half of it.

Snorting, she agrees, patting his ass as he steps over her legs, making his way down the hallway.

Half an hour later, the pizza arrives and Donna opens it, excited to dig in. They've found this delicious pizza parlor not far from their place, and she eats it any chance she gets.

"Harvey," she calls out, pulling out two plates from a cabinet, "the pizza is here."

He comes out of the office where he'd been finishing some paperwork, rubbing his stomach. "I'm starving," he proclaims, stepping behind her and wrapping his arms around her waist at the kitchen island. He places a kiss to her ear, causing her to smirk. He nibbles her earlobe, tongue peeking out to trail a path down her neck, sucking on her pulse point.

She moans, leaning into his embrace. "Mm," she moans, eyes rolling shut, "Starving for pizza or…?"

Harvey exhales a snort into her neck, pecking his lips there before pulling away. "Both," he grins, that wolfish look in his eye. "Pizza first, then you."

Shaking her head and calling him an idiot, she grabs a slice, placing it onto her plate.

Sitting down, her stomach turns, the smell of the pizza suddenly not enticing her like normal. Donna takes a few bites, forcing herself to swallow. She asks Harvey if his tastes alright, and he says it does. "Maybe it's the tomatoes," she mumbles, thinking something is off with her portion.

"Told you those things were disgusting," he bobs his head in the direction of her plate, causing her to roll her eyes. He's never even tried them, stubborn man, always picking them off when she orders them on the entire pizza, but she grins anyway, knowing he'll never give in to trying them.

Shrugging, she nibbles a few more bites, enough to fill her stomach for the night. She'd had a big lunch with Rachel, so she wasn't that hungry anyway.

Harvey watches her curiously, asking her a few times if she's okay.

Assuring him she is, she forces the food down, not wanting to worry him. Her stomach will probably be upset later, but she'll suffer for a night and then be fine come morning.

After dinner, they climb into bed, Donna's stomach feeling too queasy to do anything other than sleep the night away with Harvey's arms wrapped protectively around her.

{**************************}

The next day, Donna walks into Rachel's office, yawning as she closes the door.

"Well, good morning to you, too," Rachel snickers, asking her with suggestive eyebrows if she had a long night.

Donna chuckles, situating herself in the plush chair across from her friend's desk. "I wish," she scoffs dryly. "I felt sick after we ate Veraci's last night," she explains. "It was weird; that place is normally so good."

Rachel's head tilts in sympathy, asking her if she feels better today.

"Yeah, yeah," Donna assures, "I think the tomatoes were just bad."

Rachel nods, stating that happened to her once. "I waited a few months to eat there again because I was unsure about it," she laughs.

Donna thinks that's what she and Harvey will do, and she changes the subject, just talking about the pizza making her feel uneasy. "Anyway, what do we have today?"

Her friend smiles, running through a list of items the office needs to get done today. She updates her on the associates and cases they're working, reminds her of the interview she has to conduct this afternoon, and informs her Mike and Harvey are both out at court today.

Nodding, Donna stands, taking a set of files from off of Rachel's desk.

The brunette stands as well, grabbing her coffee cup. She juts her head in the direction of the lounge, grinning as she tells Donna it's time for a coffee break.

The girls giggle, linking arms together as they make their way down the corridor.

Donna has missed this; she loves being able to take downtime at work with her best friend. It's nice to get some girl talk in every now and then but also be able to help each other with their workloads however much they can.

"We should call Louis later," Donna says, pouring coffee into Rachel's mug for her. She hands her the steaming cup, and Rachel thanks her, reaching into the refrigerator to get the creamer she likes.

Donna pours her own as she listens to Rachel go on about the last time she spoke with him. He was taking Lucy to her first ballet, and Donna smiles at the image of the four month old all dressed up and accompanying her dad, no matter how ridiculous it may be to take a newborn to the ballet. "He said Sheila's been sick, so he's trying to balance work and taking care of Lucy at night by himself."

Frowning, Donna makes a mental note to call and check on Sheila later as well.

"Morning, girls," one of their employees, Maxine, greets. The blonde bounces into the break room, pouring herself a cup of coffee once Donna finishes.

Donna and Rachel sit down at the wooden high top table in the middle of the room as they greet the girl. Maxine flips her hair as she talks to them about a case she's working, and the scent of her perfume hits Donna in the face.

Her nose turns up, and she brings a hand to subtly cover her nose. She feels the coffee she'd just sipped on turn in her stomach. What an odd feeling. Maxine's perfume is normally light and fresh, and she wonders if she got a new one.

The blonde waves her goodbye to the women, making her way back to her desk.

"Are you okay?" Rachel asks, reaching over to take Donna's hand.

The redhead nods, uncovering her nose. She clears her throat, saying, "Her perfume was really loud, wasn't it?"

Rachel shrugs, a little confused, letting Donna know that she didn't think it was.

"Maybe I'm still not feeling well from that pizza last night," Donna reasons uneasily, taking another sip of her coffee.

Rachel nods, a lift in her eyebrow that makes Donna think she doesn't quite believe her. Donna tilts her head, about to ask Rachel what the suspicious look is for, when Maxine walks back in. She stands next to Donna, asking her if she was going to get the new company policy out to the associates this week or next.

She suppresses the urge to roll her eyes–Maxine has been a little overeager since the Paulsen-Specters moved here, Rachel claiming it was because she wanted to be just like Donna in a few years–and despite how flattering that is, the girl sometimes seemed as if she was trying to manage Donna since she'd been there longer.

Donna tells her she's going to work on getting it out within the next few days, clearing her throat once more as she pushes down the sensation to throw up at the scent of her perfume again.

Maxine smiles sweetly, leaving the room again with a wave over her shoulder.

Standing suddenly, the legs of the chair scraping against the tile floor harshly, Donna covers her mouth, signaling in the direction of the bathroom to Rachel with her free hand.

Overwhelmed with the sensation, Donna walks quickly, trying not to alert anyone's attention to her. She gets to the restroom, sinking to her knees in a stall as she empties the contents of her stomach forcefully.

She coughs, spitting into the bowl as she tries to get the sick out of her mouth. She feels disgusting, another wave of nausea hitting her as she retches into the toilet again.

Rachel comes in, calling her name gently and rubbing her back. The brunette stands above Donna, holding her red hair out of her face for her. Donna spits into the toilet again when she finishes throwing up, groaning at the awful feeling in her mouth and the quiver of her stomach.

"You okay?" Rachel asks in concern, and Donna nods pitifully, standing from the ground with a groan.

They walk to the sinks, Donna running some cool water into her palms to rinse her mouth out. She's never ordering from Veraci's again, no matter how good their pizza may be, and she tells Rachel so with a defiant pout to her lips just before she swishes some water in her mouth, spitting it out into the sink.

"Donna…" Rachel drawls hesitantly, head bobbing to the side as her eyebrows raise in suspicion.

She questions her friend with a shrug, wondering what she's trying to convey with that look on her face.

"When was your last period?"

Oh, shit. Well… Donna blinks a few times, looking to the ceiling as she recounts the last few weeks.

When they'd left Seattle the first time, she and Harvey had gone home, finishing some things in New York. She was on her period then, she remembers hoping it would end before they went on their honeymoon. It had, thankfully, and she hadn't had to worry about it since around their first week back here. She recalls being moody and cranky, cursing the period gods for sending it to her the one week she was off of work and having to move furniture and set up their new space.

"Uh," Donna's brow scrunches, shaking her head, "Just after we moved here. So, what was that," she shrugs, "almost three months ago?"

Rachel's eyes go wide, full of excitement as she breathes Donna's name out like a reverent prayer and bites her lip.

Not wanting to believe she and Harvey could have gotten that lucky already, she tamps down her excitement that is bubbling inside of her as well. "No," she giggles awkwardly, waving a hand in the air, "I can't be."

"Why not?"

Donna shrugs, confesses to Rachel that with her age, she just didn't think it would happen so soon. Her doctor back in New York had already warned her that getting pregnant would probably be a challenge since she was in her forties, they might have to consider other alternatives like IVF if they really wanted a baby.

"I mean," Rachel starts, leaning a hip against the bathroom counter, hands landing on her hips. "You guys haven't exactly been not trying, right?"

Exhaling a chuckle, Donna agrees. They'd stopped using condoms the night they got married, no longer seeing the point in them when they both knew starting a family was part of what they wanted out of life, and the sooner they did it, the less risks they took.

Donna's teeth sink into her bottom lip, trying to quell her excited smile as a lump forms in her throat. "Rachel," she breathes, tears welling in the base of her eyelids. "Maybe I am..."

Rachel takes Donna's hands in hers, both smiling brightly. Rachel bounces on her heels like a kid on Christmas as she walks around Donna toward the door, saying she's got a pregnancy test in her desk that Donna can use.

Her head whips around at that, turning to look at Rachel before she can open the bathroom door. "And why, pray tell," her eyebrows lift with a smirk, "do you have a pregnancy test in your desk?"

Rachel giggles, shrugging nonchalantly. "Mike and I thought I might be a few weeks ago, so," she shrugs again, hand gripping the door handle. "They come in packs of two!"

Donna laughs in disbelief, shaking her head. "You should have told me!" she squeals, suddenly imagining how exciting it would be to be pregnant at the same time as their best friends. "We would be adorable pregnant together."

Rachel's smile beams brighter as she nods, saying she'll be right back.

Fifteen minutes later, Donna and Rachel are sitting in the locked bathroom. They're on the floor, backs against the wall underneath the paper towel dispenser and legs stretched out in front of them, both staring down at the pregnancy test in Donna's hands.

There are tears in both of their eyes as Donna reads the symbol on the stick.

Pregnant.

"I can't believe it," she whispers, bringing the test closer to her face. "I really didn't think this would happen for us," she admits in disbelief. "Not yet anyway."

Rachel wipes a tear from under her own eye, laying her head on Donna's shoulder. "I'm really happy for you, Donna."

Her arms wrap around Donna's waist as best they can from their position on the floor, and Donna lays her head against Rachel's, still staring at the test as she intertwines her fingers with the younger girl's.

"I have to tell Harvey," she says excitedly.

"His birthday is in a few days, right?" Rachel asks, head popping up to look into Donna's eyes.

She nods, smiling as she imagines revealing to her husband that she's pregnant on his big day. "Maybe I should give him this as his present," she half-jokes, holding up the pregnancy test.

They both laugh, Rachel instantly taking out her phone and pulling up Pinterest to look for a cute way her friend can reveal the news to her husband.

After another twenty minutes, when they hear someone knocking at the door, they decide they should get off the floor and go get some work done, not that Donna will be able to get anything done now after finding out this news.

With a plan in mind, and a gift already ordered and on the way for Harvey, Donna makes her way back to her office, head overwhelmed with thoughts of pregnancy and red-headed or dirty blonde babies and all the ways she and Harvey will celebrate this good news.

{*****************************}

Two days later, Harvey walks into their apartment, inhaling deeply as he smells his favorite meal cooking. "Honey, I'm home," he jests, taking off his jacket.

He spies Donna in the kitchen, dancing barefoot to music that is playing from her phone. He takes a moment, leaning his elbows onto the kitchen island as he watches her dance.

God, he loves this woman. She's so carefree here in Seattle, in their new life together, and it makes him happy to see her so happy.

"Hey there, handsome," she calls, slinging a dish towel over her shoulder as she shimmies her hips in his direction. She reaches a hand out, summoning him to the other side of the island to join her with the bend of her finger.

Smirking, he rights himself, making his way over to his wife. He takes her hands in his, swaying her to the new song that just came on. He twirls her around, Donna giggling at the movement.

He pulls her close, burying his nose into the crook of her neck. She does the same, and they stay like that for a moment, lost in the feel of one another.

Harvey kisses her neck, pulling back to look into her beautiful face. She's the most gorgeous woman he's ever had the pleasure of knowing, and the fact that she chose him to be her husband never ceases to amaze him.

"Happy birthday," she murmurs, leaning in to kiss him.

He smiles into it, kissing her back as his thumb traces over her wedding rings.

This has already been the best birthday he's had in a very long time. She'd woken him up with her lips around his cock, the vibrations from her moans jolting his member wide awake.

They'd had breakfast delivered from their favorite diner, and had gone into work late after eating and showering together, just enjoying the morning before the crazy work day began.

She'd left early, claiming she had some things to do before his birthday dinner, and he'd smirked as she left, confused as to what she could be doing. They'd agreed weeks ago to spend his birthday at home, just the two of them. They would go to dinner with Mike and Rachel this weekend to celebrate, so he knew she wasn't planning on a surprise get together or anything.

"The burgers are almost ready," she announces, pulling him from his thoughts, and he hums his approval. She made the best burgers, surprising him one night when they were just friends when she made him dinner after a hard trial, baking the hamburgers in the oven instead of grilling them. He'd been skeptical at first, but they'd been seasoned to perfection and cooked just right.

He steps back, saying he's going to go get comfortable.

She nods, pecking his lips before he walks to their bedroom, removing his suit and putting on a pair of jeans and a beige sweater.

{****************************}

After dinner, the pair make their way into the living room.

They settle onto the couch, and Harvey spies a little gift bag on the coffee table. He looks over to Donna, raising his eyebrows as he reaches for it. "What's this?" he grins.

Chuckling, Donna pushes her hair away from her face, tying it back into a messy bun. "Just a little something for the birthday boy."

He picks up the bag, leaning over to place a kiss to her shoulder before removing the light blue tissue paper.

He peers inside, his breath lost to him when he sees what's inside.

A pair of tiny little black shoes with coffee cups on them.

He reaches in, pulling them out and placing them in the palm of his hand. "Donna…"

"Just pretend there's a splash of vanilla in each of those," she giggles, rolling her eyes. "It's lame, I know," she waves her hand, taking the baby shoes from him and placing them on the coffee table, "Just keep going." She points at the bag, encouraging him to look back inside.

He smiles, a lump of emotion already forming in his throat.

He takes out the next item: a small gray onesie with the words Today's your lucky day. It's the day you get to meet our baby with March 2020 printed underneath it in cursive writing.

Tears well in his eyes as he hears a younger Donna, from years past, declaring that it was his lucky day inside of a bar as he shook hands with his future. He laughs wetly, removing the final item.

It's wrapped in pink tissue paper, and those tears finally slip from his eyes when he unwraps the pregnancy test.

"I'm pregnant, Harvey," she chokes out, and he looks to her, tears in her hazel eyes as well. "And don't worry, I cleaned it off."

They both snicker with tears in their eyes, and he places the items gathered in his lap all on the table, pulling her into his lap. She straddles him while letting out a tiny giggle, arms looping around his neck as they both sniffle back their emotion.

Harvey is speechless. All he can do is place his lips to hers firmly, showing her how excited he is for this. He kisses her and kisses her, placing sweet pecks along her jaw and neck before going back to her lips. "I," a kiss to her cheek, "love," a kiss to the tip of her nose, "you," a kiss to her lips, this one searing and passionate.

Her fingers tangle in the short hair at the back of his neck, pulling him even closer to her body. His hands are on her waist, thumbs caressing against her hips. He pulls back, looking at his wife in wonderment. "I can't believe this," he breathes, a bright smile beaming on his face. He's never been this happy, ever.

She smiles down at him, placing a kiss to her jaw. "Are you happy?"

He sits back even further, giving her a look that can only be taken as Are you serious? "I'm more than happy, Donna," he vows, kissing her again as a tear slips down his cheek. "This is the greatest news you've ever given me."

She bites her lip, nodding as tears fill her eyes again. He reaches up, thumb swiping away one that falls. "Take me to bed, Harvey," she commands on a breathy exhale.

"Gladly," he growls, his hands cupping her rear as he stands. Her legs wrap around his waist, her lips sucking on his neck as he carries his wife to bed.

They spend the rest of the night wrapped in each other's arms, Harvey doting sweet kisses to her still-flat belly after they finish making love, laughing and asking her what she thinks the baby will look like.

"We have to go get one of those baby name books," he says, propping himself up on his elbows to look at her.

Donna giggles, reminding him they can pull up baby name websites on their phone. His eyes light up, reaching across her to grab his cellphone, instantly pulling up one of the many sites.

"You know we don't even know what we're having," she laughs, shaking her head at his excitement.

Harvey shrugs, claiming that they can look at both boy and girl names for now.

They peruse the name list, vetoing the most terrible of names and wondering why anyone would ever name their child these things.

He asks again, in the quiet of their bedroom, what she thinks it'll look like. Donna smiles small, eyes growing heavy with sleep, as she runs her fingertips against his back. "Maybe red hair," she grins, "but hopefully your brown eyes."

Shaking his head, he replies emphatically, "Nope, nuh-uh," he snickers, placing another kiss to her belly, "they better have your beautiful hazel ones."

She smiles down at him, nodding noncommittally. He slides up the bed, pecking her lips before moving back down to place his ear to her stomach.

Chortling, Donna reminds him that he can't feel anything yet, but he simply shrugs, saying he doesn't care.

"I love you," he whispers to her stomach, his brown eyes then trailing up to hers. She's looking at him with hooded eyes, her naked chest rising and falling as she breathes deeply, sleep pulling her under more and more with each passing second.

Donna's fingers run lightly through his hair, a feeling he loves and will never tire of, as he kisses up her stomach, placing a kiss to each of her nipples, before kissing her collarbone, up to her lips. He stays there, pressing a half-dozen more pecks to her lips as he says, "And I love you, too."

She smiles drowsily, nodding as she assures him that she loves him as well. He curls into her neck, breathing in the scent of her lingering perfume and their sex, as he falls asleep against the woman he loves.

{**************************}

"Harvey, we're going to be late," she states, tapping on the glass window of his office a week later.

He holds up a finger, finishing a phone call as he nods in her direction, giving her a small smile.

He hangs up, grabbing his jacket and putting it on. "I'm ready," he says, checking his pocket for his car keys. "I wouldn't let anything keep us from our first appointment."

She grins, shaking her head at what a sap he really is. She loves him for it, though. He'd been so excited the morning after his birthday, asking when they'd go to the doctors and when they could find out what they were having and a million other questions he'd thought of overnight. He was adorable. He was going to be the best dad this town has ever seen.

He walks toward her, taking her hand in his as he leads her from the building.

They get to the doctor's office; luckily Rachel had a great one to recommend since Donna hadn't been there long enough to scope them out yet.

The couple is called back to the examination room, and they meet the doctor.

She's a nice lady, a bit older than Donna. Her black hair has streaks of salt in it, and she's got laugh lines around the corners of her blue eyes. She gives off an aura of calm and friendliness, and Donna instantly likes her.

"Hi," she greets with a friendly smile. "I'm Dr. Austin," she tells the couple, shaking their hands.

She goes through the routine questions–when her last period was, when she took her pregnancy test, if there's been any spotting (that one makes Harvey's eyes grow wide in concern, which just makes her smirk), a run through of her medical history, any medication she's currently taking, and so on.

After gathering all the necessary information, the doctor completes a regular check up. She checks Donna's heart, lungs, breasts, and abdomen. They then do a blood test to confirm the pregnancy before they can do anything else.

Donna didn't realize how much went into the first doctor's appointment, but the OB/GYN assures her the other's won't consist of so many tests. They run the blood work to test for a slew of medical conditions, she had to complete a urine test and also get a pap smear.

After that is said and done, the doctor chats with Donna, finding out as much history as she can while also calculating the closest estimate for a due date since they aren't exactly sure what day specifically their baby was conceived. Dr. Austin gives them information and pamphlets, instructing Donna on foods to avoid and how much exercise to get, where her heart rate should be while working out, and other helpful tips like changes her body will experience over the next few months.

Harvey, ever the attentive one, sits and takes notes, typing away furiously on his phone, trying to record all the information the doctor is spewing. It makes Donna smile, her heart warming as she sees how excited he really is for this new stage of life.

Once the bloodwork comes back and everything is taken care of, Dr. Austin smiles, asking, "Are you ready for an ultrasound?"

They both nod, excitement fluttering in Donna's stomach as she takes Harvey's hand. She lets the couple know that they probably won't see much since it's still early–she's only around nine weeks at this point–but they might get lucky enough to hear the heartbeat.

Donna yawns, a hand reaching up to cover her mouth as she apologizes. Dr. Austin laughs, promising her it's fine. "Fatigue is a very common side effect at this stage in a pregnancy. You'll feel tired for a few more weeks, but then hopefully your energy levels will return."

Donna nods, preparing herself for the instrument to be inserted. The doctor glides the gel onto the doppler, inserting it gently into Donna's vagina.

Harvey squeezes her hand in support, both of them watching the screen as Dr. Austin moves the wand around, showing them different parts of Donna's reproductive system that she'll be checking up on.

After a minute or so, the doctor stops moving the instrument, holding it in place as she clicks away at her machine. "And there's your baby," she announces cheerfully, Harvey and Donna both leaning in closer to the screen.

There isn't much to see, admittedly, the doctor informing them that the baby is only about the size of a cherry right now, but after a moment, there's a solid swoosh thump thump thump swoosh sound emanating from the monitor.

Tears fill Donna's eyes as they listen to their child's heartbeat, and Harvey's grip on her hand tightens. She looks over at him, noting the tears in his own eyes.

He looks down at her, a wet chuckle falling from his lips as he reaches up, swiping at his cheek. Harvey bends down, pressing a kiss to the top of her hair as they both turn to look back at the screen again.

Dr. Austin freezes the screen, drawing a line to show them exactly where baby is located and how tiny it really is right now. She takes a few screenshots, printing them out for Donna and Harvey to keep.

She removes the instrument from Donna, cleaning it off while Donna sits up straighter. The doctor situates herself back on the rolling stool in front of her, asking if they have any questions.

Donna is a bit overwhelmed, and she knows Harvey is too, and she confesses as much to the doctor. She smiles, assuring them that's totally normal. "You can always call me if you think of anything."

Nodding, Donna listens as the doctor runs through some basic developmental information–telling the couple that their baby's muscles are starting to form this week, and they are officially now a fetus, not an embryo anymore.

The couple beams hearing the development their baby is going through, and Harvey squeezes her hand, tapping their interlocked fingers against her thigh as his eyebrows raise in excitement.

The doctor leaves, giving Donna time to get dressed, and before they exit the building, they're handed even more pamphlets of information from what car seats to buy to breastfeeding vs. bottle feeding, and a handful of other things Donna hasn't even thought of thinking about yet.

Sighing as she settles into the passenger seat, Donna looks over to Harvey. "So that was a lot of information."

He laughs, agreeing. "I wrote down as much as I could, but I'm sure I missed some things."

Smiling softly, she takes his free hand as he pulls out of the parking lot, promising him it'll be fine. "You were great. I'm sure whatever you wrote down is plenty."

He smiles back, bringing their linked hands up to his mouth and pressing a kiss to her knuckles.

At the next red light, Harvey leans over, placing a kiss to her lips before asking, "Why don't we go to the store and look at some baby stuff?"

God, he is adorable. She might not make it through the next six months without jumping his bones at every opportunity if he keeps this up. The hormones coursing through her body alone will make her want to do that, let alone if he keeps looking like such an excited little puppy dog wagging its tail as it waits for its next treat.

She giggles at how much she loves him, nodding and agreeing that they can go look at some things.

They spend the next two hours walking through the baby section at Target, looking at everything from cribs to bottles, baby clothes, bathing accessories, burp cloths, diapers, formula, toys… everything.

"What color should we paint the nursery?" Harvey asks, turning to look at Donna as he holds up two onesies up and out.

She smirks, pointing to the cuter of the two. Harvey grins, tossing it into the shopping cart, but Donna ultimately decides the white outfit with Let's Taco 'Bout It with a brightly colored taco is more boy-ish than gender neutral, and she doesn't want to buy anything gender specific until they know what they're having.

Shrugging, Donna subtly places the onesie back where it came from and finally answers his question, saying she was thinking a neutral color. "That way we can just accessorize it to match a boy or a girl."

Harvey smiles, picking up a pack of black and white bibs, laughing at the silly sayings printed on them as he agrees. "We could also do a light gray to match the house," he smirks, always making fun of her for her affinity toward the color.

Snorting, she says "I think that's actually a great idea." She sticks her tongue out at him playfully, and he chortles, putting the bibs back on the wrack.

They walk to the next aisle, eyeing up all the bathing items there are from baby bathtubs to washcloths, body wash, shampoo, toys, and the works.

Donna shakes her head, telling Harvey they need to get home soon. They can shop online later, but she's hungry and dinner is calling her name.

"Whatever my wife and child want," he chuckles, pressing a kiss to her cheek as they head toward the check out line.

She's overwhelmed with how much there is, but as they leave the store with a yellow Bumbo seat in hand (an item they won't need for several more months, but it was gender neutral and they wanted to buy something) she can't help but imagine what life will be like now with a little Harvey or Donna running around them, turning their world upside down and filling their hearts with more love than they ever thought possible.

It's a new stage in life, one she honestly never thought she'd get to experience, but she's beyond thrilled that she gets to do it with her best friend by her side.

{************************}

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Chapter Text

Chapter Three:

 

It’s been four weeks since they found out they were pregnant, thirteen weeks into her pregnancy and things couldn’t be going better. 

 

They’d gone to the doctor last week. Donna was given the results of all the tests they’d run during her first visit, and they got to hear the heartbeat again. It brought tears to both of their eyes, just like the first time, and she was already imagining how excited they’d be in a few weeks when they would be able to find out the sex of the baby. Donna keeps picturing strawberry blonde babies with brown eyes, sometimes they’re hazel in her dreams, but no matter what the imagined babies look like, they’re each beautiful in their own way. 

 

“I think it’s going to be a boy,” she announces, sitting on the couch next to Harvey. 

 

He looks up from his book, black glasses perched on the end of his nose. “Oh, really? I was thinking a girl.”

 

She smiles, tilting her head as she looks to him. God, he looks so sexy with those glasses on. Donna brings a knee up onto the couch, resting her head against it as they discuss baby names. Harvey tells her some girl names he’s found that he likes - There’s always Olivia, Harper, Evelyn, or maybe Sophie?

 

Chuckling, Donna informs him, “Just make sure whatever girl name you pick, which we won’t need this go ‘round, goes well with Lily.”

 

Harvey’s eyes mist over as he looks to her, nodding in silent agreement that if they were to have a daughter, Lily or Lilian would definitely be her middle name. “I mean, we can’t use Clara ,” she jests with comically wide eyes, scooting closer to Harvey and draping her legs over his lap. “No offense to my mom, but that is a terrible name.”

 

They chuckle, Harvey’s head falling softly against the back of the couch. He closes his book, which she realizes then is a baby name book, and tosses it onto the coffee table in front of them. He runs his hands along her legs, massaging her calves lightly. “Okay, then,” he says, tapping her knee. “What are your boy names you have in mind?”

 

She beams, sitting up proudly, as she tells him she has the perfect name picked out. “Gordon James Specter,” she declares with a final nod of her head. It’s the perfect combination of their father’s names, and it’d come to her soon after she’d found out they were expecting. She was laying in bed, caressing her hand over Harvey’s chest as he slept and thinking about their child. Daydreams of them calling their child’s name from across a large backyard flooded her mind, and in one such fantasy, she could clearly hear her husband yell out, “Gordan James Specter, come here right now!” which made her snicker, knowing damn well she’d have to end up being the disciplinarian when it came to their baby. But the name had stuck, instantly feeling perfect for their little guy. 

 

He takes a moment, breath seemingly caught in his throat as he begins to nod. “It’s perfect,” Harvey exhales, placing a hand to her belly that has just barely started to round. It’s not yet noticeable to anyone else, thankfully; Donna wanted to wait a little longer to announce it to anyone other than the Ross’ who already knew. She was planning on announcing it to their new friends at the office in the next week or so, when she knew she probably wouldn’t be able to hide it any longer. She could tell in her tight fitting dresses for work, but she was in the stage right now where it just looked like she’d gained a little weight. Truthfully, she couldn’t wait to have her belly rounder, more pronounced, so she didn’t feel frumpy and unkempt like she does currently.

 

Harvey’s lips descend toward her stomach as he whispers, “Hey, there, Gordon.”

 

He looks up to her, tears in his eyes, and agrees once again that it’s the most fitting name for them to bestow upon their child. 

 

{*****************************}

 

Harvey stands from the couch, extending a hand for her to take. “Let’s go to bed,” he states, pulling her up and placing his lips to hers as her arms wrap around his neck. 

 

He pulls back, grinning as he takes her hand, leading her down the hallway and into their room. 

 

Before he can remove any clothing, Donna steps back, a saucy smirk on her face. She reaches for the hem of her sweater, pulling it over her head and revealing her breasts to him. 

 

“Christ, woman,” he growls lowly, stepping into her space and cupping each one with his palms. He loves the feel of her warm skin against him, those pert little nipples grazing against his palms making him grow harder. “If I’d known you didn’t have a bra on under that top, I’d have taken you to bed hours ago.”

 

She laughs, the bubbly sound that ricochets from the depths of her soul and out into the world, always making him smile. He loves the sound of her joy; he vows to himself, not for the first time, to make her laugh every day for the rest of their lives. 

 

Harvey leans down, peppering smooches to her neck and drawing a moan from her lips. Donna reaches for his cream sweater, lifting it up and off, tossing it onto the floor as her hands come up, scratching lightly at his chiseled pecs. 

 

She bites her lips, desire swirling in her hazel orbs. “Fuck me, Harvey,” she demands hotly, pulling at his zipper. God, he loves when she talks like that. She’s so gorgeous and sexy, and he just wants to ravish her completely. 

 

The rest of their clothes are removed and they tumble onto the bed, limbs tangled around each other and in their sheets. His teeth nip at her jawline, hands scouring down her body trying to take in every gorgeous inch of her. 

 

He’s hard and pressed against her thigh as he moves his hand down, inserting two fingers into her core. She’s already so wet, fuck, he could almost get a third one in. “Oh, god,” she groans, eyes rolling shut as her head dips further into the pillow. 

 

Harvey smirks, kissing her collarbone, then swirling his tongue up her neck before landing on her lips. They mold together, Donna’s hand doing delicious things to his hardened cock between their bodies. Her grip is firm, delectably so, and he grunts in pleasure as her palm does a little twist down at his base before gliding back up to his tip, the precum seeping out slowly. 

 

She murmurs that she’s ready, and he doesn’t need to be told twice. He rolls onto his back, bringing her on top of him, knowing that she loves this position. 

 

Donna beams down at him, her red locks falling into her face. “Take what you need,” he encourages, caressing her thighs. He brings a hand up, tucking her hair behind her ears as she leans down to kiss him. It’s a sweet kiss amongst their heated actions, and he takes a moment to savor the feeling of her tongue against his. 

 

“I love you,” she whispers, positioning herself above his cock. 

 

She sinks down, taking him down to the hilt. Harvey moans at the contact, hands pulsing against her thighs before moving to grip her hips, holding steady as she begins to move.

 

They both cry out at the movement, her hips grinding against his. She speeds up as she reaches for her own breasts, tweaking her nipples and bringing them to hardened peaks. 

 

Harvey fucks up into her, drawing those mewling sounds from her that he loves to hear. It makes him feel powerful, like he’s just won the biggest court case of his career, when he can have the great Donna Paulsen-Specter crying out, begging him to fuck her. 

 

He rolls his hips, thrusting into her as she works herself up, moving against him. “M-more,” she stutters, hands falling to his chest. 

 

“What do you need, babe?” he rasps, wanting to give her all the pleasure in the world. 

 

She begs, My clit, on the tail end of another moan, and he brings one hand from her thigh to her core, rolling the sensitive bud between the pads of his fingers. “Yes, yes!” she exclaims, grinding down against his member. 

 

He can feel himself already wanting to explode, but he wants her to come this way first, so he presses more firmly against her bundle of nerves, rubbing at it as he ruts up into her more vigorously. “Donn-aaaa,” he cries, eyes falling shut momentarily at the feeling. He quickly opens them again, looking into her beautiful face. 

 

He loves to watch her come undone above him. Or below him. Or really, any position they ever try (which, if he’s being honest, is almost every position possible. He loves how adventurous she is in the bedroom.)

 

“Want you to take me in the shower later,” she pants, smirking as she says it. He shakes his head, stifling a snicker that she’s already planning their next round. 

 

“Yeah,” he grunts, pressing against her clit, bringing her closer to the edge, “Wherever you want me, I’m yours.”

 

She moans loudly at that, one hand flying into her hair and giving it a slight tug while her other hand runs down his chest. The feel of her nails on his flesh cause goosebumps to cover his arms, and he bites his lip to control the all consuming sensation washing over his body. 

 

Harvey reaches up, playing with her nipple on one breast as he moves faster. Donna moans out, telling him she’s, Cl-cloooose, so close , and his movements become jerkier as he edges closer to his own climax as well. 

 

Donna bends down, mouth crashing against his as she moans into the embrace. “I won’t be able to bend down like this for much longer,” she gasps, a breathy chuckle leaving her. 

 

He snorts, images of her swollen belly between them flashing through his mind. His one hand continues working on her bud, while the other grips her hip, encouraging her to come for him. 

 

With a few more well placed kisses and thrusts, she’s spirling over the edge of bliss, crying his name as she bounces against him. He’s almost there, too, can feel the heat growing in the depths of his stomach.

 

The sight of her breasts going up and down sends a jolt to his cock, and he follows behind her not long after her orgasm, his seed spilling into her with a cry of her name on his lips. 

 

Donna rolls off of him, their sweat slicked bodies cooling off as they separate. Her arm lands across her forehead and the other falls against her stomach as she exhales deeply, while his hands fold together, resting against his chest, completely spent.

 

She rolls over after a beat, kissing his temples before nipping at his ear. Curling into his side, Donna’s arm wraps around his middle, her fingers tracing light patterns against his chest that make his nipples harden. 

 

They catch their breath, coming down from their high. He knows he could spend the rest of his life right here in this bed with her and it would be the best life possible.

 

Harvey reaches over for the remote, turning the television on. Survivor isn’t on tonight, so he hands it to Donna. He knows she always likes to pick the movie, and he usually doesn’t protest her choices unless it’s a sappy romantic movie that he doesn’t care to sit through it for the umpteenth time. She turns it to the Investigation Discovery Channel, Harvey rolling his eyes as he points out the mistakes the lawyers make during the case on the current episode of Snapped . Donna shakes her head, and they talk about their baby and plans for the future as they watch the woman on their screen get arrested for killing her husband. Harvey eyes Donna playfully, gaze narrowing as he reminds her, Don’t get any ideas , and she chuckles, saying if she was going to kill him, she would’ve done it years ago. Smiling, she busses her lips against his, assuring him he has nothing to worry about in reality. “And besides, I’d have the second best lawyer defending me.”

 

Chortling, Harvey agrees that Louis would do absolutely anything to keep her from going to jail, even if she did commit homicide, and they laugh, memories of their ridiculous (yet wonderful) friend flit across their minds. 

 

Half an hour later, his hand still resting against their unborn child, Donna glances up at him. “Ready for that shower?” she asks with a sexy glint in her eye, her hand trailing down to stroke his cock. 

 

It instantly grows hard, and he groans out a, “Fuck, I love these pregnancy hormones already. They might just be the death of me.”

 

Guffawing, Donna sits up, unable to catch her breath in her position because she’s laughing so hard. She swats at his chest, calling him an idiot, informing him that, “It’d be the best way to go out, though,” then stands up. She calms her amusement, sauntering toward the bathroom as she sways her naked hips. 

 

His dick twitches at the mere sight of her, and he thinks her hips have gotten a little wider already, not that he minds. She’s sinfully sexy and she’s all his. She looks over her shoulder, shrugging it up as she purrs, “Well, Mr. Specter, are you ready?”

 

He’s up and at the bathroom door like a flash of lightning, hands already scouring her body, ready for their next round. “For you?” he husks, nipping at her earlobe, “Always.”

 

Smirking, her gaze flicks up to his, that hooded expression drawing him in. She slides her hand down his chest, intertwining their fingers as she guides him to the shower, completely under her spell already. 

 

{*****************************}

 

She wakes up that night with a sharp inhale. There’s an odd sensation in the pit of her stomach, one she’s never felt before. She brings a hand to it, mumbling, “You okay in there, baby?” as she smiles down at her stomach. 

 

Not used to all the new changes in her body, Donna isn’t sure what the feeling could be. She’s tempted to grab her phone off the nightstand and start googling thirteen week pregnant developments, but then the feeling in her stomach turns into more of an aching pain. 

 

Her face twists, as does her side, and she rubs her stomach again. Panic starts to take over as she imagines all the worst case scenarios. “Harvey,” she whispers, looking over to him. 

 

He’s sleeping peacefully, and she doesn’t want to wake him if it’s nothing serious. Maybe all their activities earlier just jostled something around, or maybe she ate too much at dinner and it’s just gas pains, she isn’t quite sure. 

 

She contemplates just laying back down and trying to sleep, but the pain is radiating throughout her middle now. It’s like severe period cramps but more intense than she’s ever felt before. She groans quietly, sitting up. She turns on the lamp on the bedside table, but when she does, she can feel a warm, stickiness between her thighs. She knows this feeling, has woken up to having bled out while on her period plenty of times as a preteen. She frantically reaches over then, shaking Harvey awake. 

 

He mumbles something incoherent, his eyes blurry as they try to open, then close again at the sensation of the light, then slowly reopen. “Y’okay?” he slurs, reaching out for her. 

 

“I think something is wrong, Harvey.”

 

That must get his attention, because his eyes open more fully, more awake now, as he sits up and pushes the covers back. “What’s wrong?”

 

Donna shakes her head, tears welling in her eyes as she says she doesn’t know. She takes a deep breath, trying to stay calm while recounting the feeling that woke her up. She reaches down to the warm feeling between her legs. Pulling her hand back up, there’s blood on her fingertips and her eyes widen, breaths panting out in fear.

 

Her eyes shoot over to Harvey, and she shows him her fingers as the tears start to form, a little sob escaping her. 

 

She doesn’t want to admit it, but her Donna-senses are on overdrive, and she knows something isn’t right. “It’s the baby, Harvey,” she squeaks out, looking to him fearfully. 

 

Hopping up from the bed, Harvey grabs his jacket, throwing it on over his sweatpants and t-shirt he’d been sleeping in as he calls Dr. Austin. 

 

“Harvey, it’s two in the morning,” she states meekly, wiping a lone tear from her cheek. “Don’t wake her up.”

 

He waves her off, telling her to get her jacket, as he begins speaking with the doctor. He apologizes for waking her and explains the situation. 

 

Donna tries to listen, but when she stands from the bed, she gasps, crying Harvey’s name out. 

 

He spins on his heel as she points to the bed, her face crumpling as she sees what she should’ve expected already. 

 

There’s blood on the sheets. Not a lot, but any amount is worrying. It’s a small stain where she’d been laying. Panic goes into overdrive as she knows this isn’t just normal pregnancy spotting. Her heart rate picks up, more so than it already was, and her actions quicken. She can’t think straight, just knows they need to get to the hospital now . She’s softly crying, doesn’t want to but can’t help it. Donna rubs at her eyes, groaning as she wills the tears to go away. She needs to focus, needs to get to the hospital and find out what’s happening.

 

Donna grabs her jacket out of Harvey’s outstretched hand before taking his hand in hers as they exit the apartment. “Dr. Austin said she’d meet us at the hospital,” he tells her, and all she can do is nod, her mind still stuck on that blood stain on their sheets.

 

They get to the hospital and are rushed back to an exam room. Harvey and Dr. Austin had both called ahead, so the staff knew they were coming. 

 

The sounds around Donna seem to fade as reality sinks in. 

 

She sees their doctor enter the exam room, salt and pepper hair messily thrown into a bun. Donna thinks the doctor is speaking to her, can see her mouth moving, but it’s as if she’s underwater and everything is muffled.

 

Donna is slammed back into reality when Harvey takes her hand. She blinks rapidly, looking around. She’s already on the exam table, legs up in the stirrups as Dr. Austin begins to try and find the problem. 

 

Her eyes flick to Harvey’s worried brown ones. He gives her what she assumes is an encouraging smile. She knows he’s trying to be strong for her. She’s in a foggy, daze like state–a limbo between reality and nightmare.

 

Thoughts of their baby rush to her mind as Dr. Austin places the ultrasound machine to her stomach, trying to find their child’s heartbeat. Donna holds her breath, willing that soul-warming swoosh swoosh thud to start echoing throughout the room. Her hand squeezes Harvey’s as she tearfully whispers, “Come on, baby, where are you?” as her gaze locks onto the sonogram screen, eyes unblinking. Her eyes are straining so hard trying to see their little cherry that they start to sting, and she has to blink in quick succession to bring moisture back to them.

 

Pictures of the nursery they’d started planning for, the few items she’d already bought or ordered online, the life they could’ve had all melt away like waking from a nightmare as she hears the words, Your baby is gone, and, I’m so so sorry.

 

Gone. 

 

It’s gone. 

 

Donna pushes out a strained moan, a hand flying to her stomach as the other covers her eyes, unable to look at anyone else in the room. She shakes her head, not believing the words falling from the doctor’s mouth. She thinks she hears Harvey gasp, a shuddering cry falling from his lips. 

 

Her head turns, hand falling from her eyes to the table she’s on, and her watery gaze locks with him. He’s saying something as he leans into her, but she can’t hear him. She can’t hear anything but the beat of her heartbeat wildly thumping in her ears and hum of the hospital noise out in the hallway–the monitors beeping, muffled voices of doctors and visitors all swirling together as she stares out into space, refusing to make eye contact with anyone. For looking into her husband’s face would make this all a reality, and she doesn’t think she’s strong enough to face it right now.

 

“There’s nothing you could have done,” she somehow manages to hear through the ringing in her ears. 

 

She sees Harvey silently crying, his thumb rubbing soothingly against the top of her hand while the other forcefully wipes at his cheeks, but she feels numb inside. 

 

Dead, just like their child. 

 

The doctor is solemnly explaining their options now‒miscarry naturally, called an expectant management , where they would let the fetus dispel from her body naturally or have a d&c performed tonight, letting the doctors remove what’s left of the fetus inside of her and stop the bleeding. Donna can’t concentrate, can’t do anything but shake her head in disbelief, then nod at Dr. Austin’s suggestion of the procedure. She trusts her, their doctor, she’s been more than helpful over the last few weeks, and if she thinks the d&c is the best solution, then so be it. She looks to her husband, confirming that she’s making the right decision. He leans down, presses and kiss to her cheek and whispers a tearful, “Whatever you think is best, I’m with you.”

 

Eyes wide and staring blankly ahead, she looks back to the doctor. Her eyes close as she gives her a curt nod in confirmation. 

 

She isn’t crying, can’t cry. She’s empty, broken. She knew it was too good to be true. They waited too long to get together, too many years wasted acting like they didn’t have feelings for one another. She should have kissed Harvey years sooner than she did, should have never made the ludacris I don’t sleep with people I work with rule in the first place. This is all her fault.

 

The next thing she can recall is sitting in the car, watching with stunned, cold eyes as the streetlights wizz by while Harvey drives them home. Memories of the last few hours swirl in her mind‒being given a light anesthesia to numb the pain (though it wasn’t needed, she’s already numb to the world around her), her uterus being scrapped at, removing what remained of their child, doctors giving her information from every direction which she heard none of, still completely in a foggy haze. She just hopes Harvey was listening; she’s positive her was. 

 

Neither one of them say anything on the torturous drive home, but she can feel his hand in hers, squeezing it in that way he does when he’s being supportive. 

 

She hates this. 

 

She closes her eyes, then opens them slowly, resting her head against the car window. It’s cold against her heated skin, the rain outside dropping onto the windows as if a metaphor for the tears her body refuses to let fall. 

 

When they get home, she walks as if she’s in a daze into their apartment, jacket dropping onto the back of the couch, arms barely able to lift themselves up high enough to do even that simple task. Her body feels weighed down, her feet dragging across the wooden floor. She can feel Harvey’s presence behind her, hears the jingle of the car keys against the marble countertop as he tosses them down.

 

Making her way into the bedroom, she inhales sharply, her eyes falling onto the round stain of crimson on their white sheets. “Oh, shit,” she hears Harvey mutter painfully.

 

He balls the sheets together, shrugging and mumbling something about throwing them in the wash, or away, she isn’t quite sure. He moves about the room, tossing a fresh, gray pair of sheets onto their mattress. 

 

She stands there, arms dangling limply by her side as she watches her husband strip the sheets, changing them quicker than she’s ever seen him do anything before. He still has tears on his cheeks, and he keeps looking at her, keeps trying to talk, but she’s gone mute. There’s nothing left for her to say. Isn’t sure she’d be able to form words without breaking down into a sobbing mess, crumpled on the floor and holding her stomach where her child no longer grows anyway.

 

She royally screwed up. This is worse than when she slept with the charming Brit turned murderer, Stephen Huntley, or entertained the thought of sleeping with a married man to try and bandage the gaping wound that was her broken heart at the time. It’s definitely worse than when she shredded that damn memo trying to protect Harvey, or impersonated a national transportation agent and almost went to jail. This is far worse than any mistake she’s ever made in life, and it’s all her fault. 

 

Harvey should hate her. She hates her. 

 

Tossing her purse onto the armchair in their room, she’s pretty sure some of the contents spill out and land on the floor, but she doesn’t care. She crawls into the freshly made bed, pulling the covers over her head as she sinks into oblivion. 

 

She never wants to wake again. She doesn’t want to see the pain and blame on Harvey’s face that she knows will be there when his tears dry. The tears she’s caused. Reality will hit him soon enough, and he will realize exactly what has happened.

 

The look in his eyes alone might just kill her. Just like she killed their baby. 

 

{***************************}

 

She’s still in bed. 

 

It’s been two days since they found out their child was gone, two days since his wife has spoken, two days since he’s seen her smile... since he’s smiled, if he’s being truthful.

 

Harvey sits on the edge of the bed, brushing her tangled hair from out of her eyes. “Do you want to try and go to work today?” he asks gently, hand falling to her shoulder. He knows, realistically, neither one of them should be at work right now, but distracting himself with cases is how he’s always handled things, and he wants her to at least move from the bed today. 

 

She stares past him, has hardly made eye contact with him since they were in the doctor’s office, as she shakes her head, burying herself deeper under the covers. 

 

“We have some exciting news!” Harvey cheers, a smile beaming wider than he ever thought possible. 

 

He and Donna are walking around a local craft fair after seeing a movie with Mike and Rachel to celebrate his birthday. They’d spent his actual birthday at home, just the two of them, and he was so glad they did because it was the night she told him they were going to have a baby. 

 

The news sent him on a high, better than any pot the coffee cart guy could have ever given him. He’d taken her in his arms that night, unable to stop touching her stomach. He couldn’t wait to see how she grew with their child inside of her. 

 

“We’re having a baby!” he exclaims, clasping his hands together excitedly. Mike’s eyes widen as he sets a handmade welcome mat down, a smile growing on his face.

 

“That’s amazing, guys!” he cries joyously, walking away from the merchant’s booth to hug his former mentor. Harvey beams, accepting the embrace with a chuckle as Donna comes over, too, welcoming the puppy’s congratulations. 

 

They continue down the row of booths, the women giggling as Rachel confesses she’s the one who gave Donna the pregnancy test and helped her plan the onesie for Harvey’s birthday. 

 

They all laugh, Harvey thanking the younger woman for her help. “We’re really excited,” Donna says, a gorgeous smile on her face as her hand falls to her flat belly. “We want to wait a while, though, before we tell anyone at work or anything.”

 

Everyone nods, agreeing this will just be their secret for now.

 

Thank god it had been, he thinks ruefully. It would be ten times harder to go back to work if everyone was going to look at him with pity in their eyes. 

 

They’d both called in sick yesterday, Harvey having to tell Mike and Rachel over the phone what had happened. Rachel had cried, of course, but tried to hide it. Mike had given him his sympathies and told him to take all the time he needed off work. 

 

Harvey being Harvey, though, couldn’t stay away for too long. He needed something to focus on other than his grief. 

 

“Are you hungry?” he asks, leaning down to try and look into her eyes. 

 

She eventually nods, and hope blooms in his stomach. She’s hardly touched any of the food he’d brought her over the last two days, and he’s been worried. “I’ll be right back,” he says, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. 

 

Coming back in with a bowl of oatmeal, he blows on it as he sits down on the edge of the mattress again. Harvey pulls back the covers just enough to reveal her face that she’s covered up again, and he smiles when her eyes flick up to his. “Here,” he whispers, blowing on the spoonful of breakfast once more. 

 

He holds it up close to her mouth, encouraging her to take a bite. Her lips part, just slight enough for him to slide the spoon in. She chews slowly, swallowing with a pained expression on her face as if eating is literally the worst thing he could make her do right now. 

 

He brushes her hair back again as he feeds her a few more bites. With each spoonful, he can see some color coming back to her freckled cheeks and can tell her energy level is rising enough that he feels more comfortable going back to work today and leaving her home alone. 

 

“I’m going to come home on my lunch break, okay?”

 

She just nods, taking another bite of oatmeal. Donna sits up a bit further in the bed, and good, that’s progress, he thinks, as he gives her an encouraging smile. She sighs heavily, taking the spoon and bowl from him. 

 

Her lips twitch up in the tiniest glimmer of a smile, but it falls before it can fully form as she swallows another bite. “I think,” she croaks, her voice dry from not speaking for two days. She clears it, a hand pressing against her throat as she swallows. “I think I’m going to shower.”

 

He nods, not wanting to act too excited, but deep down his soul is throwing a party. She hasn’t left the bed except to use the bathroom since they got home from the hospital. A shower will be good. It will make her feel a little better, more refreshed hopefully. “That’ll feel nice,” he encourages. 

 

Her eyes roll as she sets the bowl down on the bedside table. She slumps back into the bed, pulling the sheet up to her chin once more, eyes closing, as is the norm nowadays. 

 

With a quiet sigh, he leans in, kissing her cheek and telling her he’ll be home in a few hours. “I love you, Donna,” he mumbles into the top of her hair before making his way from the room.

 

As he leaves, he’s almost certain he hears the faintest whisper of I love you, too coming from beneath the covers.

 

{*******************************}

 

He’s being so strong for her. She hates that she can’t pull herself out of this slump just yet. She’s Donna. She’s supposed to be the strong one, always. 

 

She has been in bed for two days, two long, miserable days. Her mind has been torturing her for the last forty-eight hours, reminding her of all the mistakes she made during her short pregnancy. 

 

She’d had a glass of wine the night before she found out she was pregnant. She’d laughed too hard at Mike’s jokes at Harvey’s birthday dinner, jostling their little cherry around too much. Maybe she ate something she wasn’t supposed to. That list of foods the doctor’s office had given them was long, maybe they’d somehow missed something. She and Harvey had had sex the night of her… miscarriage.

 

Maybe that was why their baby died. It really was her fault, and she knew Harvey would hate her forever when he finally realized what she’d done. 

 

He’s been so strong for her since she woke him up that night: making sure she eats, holding her through her nightmares that have been waking her, trying to get her to talk and open up. He’s been her rock even though she hasn’t been able to do anything to show her appreciation or be there for him in the same way. Which, honestly, makes her guilt grow tenfold. He’s always comforted her, she should have done the same for him. 

 

Harvey comes home for lunch that day, stepping gingerly into their bedroom to check on her. She had taken a shower a few hours ago, and honestly, it made her feel more human. She wasn’t sure if that was a good thing though. Should she be allowed to feel good after what she did?

 

She has the television on, some old black and white movie droning on in the background. She’s not even sure what it is or what channel it’s on. She’d just honestly needed some background noise as she attempted to sleep the day away. Not having Harvey bustling around made the apartment feel a thousand times more empty, all of her guilt weighing on her and crashing onto her like the biggest of waves.

 

“Hey, you,” he greets, coming to sit at the foot of the bed. 

 

She’s sitting up, back against the headboard, which is an improvement from suffocating under the blankets and her own guilt for two days straight. She supposes that’s why he’s smiling, though she can tell he’s trying to tamp down the happiness that’s growing on his face. 

 

She hates that. She doesn’t want to steal any more of his joy than she already has.

 

Tears fill the base of her eyes as she thinks about what has happened. For some reason, seeing Harvey trying not to be happy over the fact that she showered makes reality hit. 

 

She hasn’t cried since they got the news. She’s been too numb to the world around her, too depressed. But now, sitting in bed with slightly damp hair curling around her shoulders, she begins to weep. 

 

Whimpering, she sniffles, reaching up to wipe the tears away forcefully. She groans as the weight of the past few days overwhelms her, and the sobs begin to wrack her body, shaking her where she sits on the mattress. It feels good, to cry, to let it all out, but the knowledge of what happened still makes her heart feel as if there’s an anvil sitting atop it, crushing her with every breath.

 

Harvey reaches out, a hand landing on her knee as he squeezes, calling her name. She shakes her head, trying to inhale and exhale slowly, unable to breathe properly right now. Donna vaguely wonders if this is what a mental breakdown feels like, or a panic attack, or if this is just the result of holding everything in for days on end.

 

“I’m so,” she hiccups, tears streaming down her face. All the tears she’s held inside since the other night consume her, all escaping her sad eyes at one time. She can’t stop the flow of agony streaming down her cheeks now that it’s started. “I’m so s-sorry, Har-vey.”

 

His face falls, brows scrunching together as he scoots closer, pulling her into his arms. 

 

It’s the first time she’s felt his warmth in two days. He’s been cuddling into her at night, sure, but she’s been too emotionless, too numb, to really accept it. This, though, this embrace conveys all his love and sorrow all in one. Being wrapped in him, feeling his weight against her, is a physical reminder that she’s not alone in all of this, and she has to admit that it feels nice. 

 

“Hey,” he says, shushing her as he kisses her forehead. “What are you apologizing for?”

 

Her face crumbles as she sinks into his arms. He’s so perfect, God, he doesn’t even realize what she’s done to them. “For killing our baby,” she wails pitifully, the tears uncontrollable at this point. She wipes at her face, and she grabs at the box of tissues on her nightstand, blowing her nose before tossing it onto the wooden table. 

 

Harvey shakes his head, and she can hear a, No, no no no, being mumbled into her hair as he places kiss after kiss there. He rubs her back, soothing her, as she tries to calm her crying. 

 

“You have nothing to apologize for, okay?” He pulls back, looking deeply into her eyes. It’s the first time she’s really looked at him in days, and the depth of his brown orbs pulls her in, reminding her of how much she loves him. His eyes are so clear, so free of hatred for her, and it breaks and soothes her heart in equal measure. “And I never want to hear you say that again.”

 

She nods sadly, lip quivering as her sobs start to subside.

 

Harvey kisses the top of her head again, promising her they will get through this together. “You can’t shut me out, though, remember?” he claims, making her recall a conversation they’d had early into their relationship.

 

And she knows, she knows he is the one person that she can always talk to, so she promises him that, “I’ll try harder not to hold it all in.” 

 

Donna apologizes for shutting him out and tells him that she loves him. A smile warms his face, as he vows his love right back to her as well. 

 

With a kiss to her cheek, he tells her he’s going to take the rest of the day off, and she nods, the faintest of smiles on her lips. She’s glad he won’t leave her after her breakdown, she needs him right now. Donna hates to admit that, being the independent woman that she is, but she does. 

 

They spend the rest of the day cleaning the apartment, getting her to move around and start to live life again, no matter how unlike herself she now feels. It’s like she’s a new person, trying to live her old life. But she has to try, has to do something.

 

That night, she asks him if he wants to go get dinner at Veraci’s and his face almost splits in two from joy. He agrees, grabbing their jackets and taking her hand in his. 

 

Grieving this loss won’t be easy, she’ll have to deal with a lot of emotions inside of herself, battle her own mind as it continues to blame her for what happened, but she knows with Harvey by her side, she can overcome anything. 

 

{************************}

 

{****************************}

 

The weeks have gone by, and things are still hard. Donna is getting better, she’s been coming to work, and while there’s still a sadness surrounding her, she’s much more her old self than she was. 

 

Losing their child was hard, far harder than Harvey could have ever imagined. He’d spent the first few days so worried about Donna that he hadn’t had time to truly process the loss they’d been through. 

 

It wasn’t until about a week later, the day before Donna came back to work, that it hit him. He was sitting in his office, working on a case, when he heard two secretaries just outside his door talking about one of their sisters who just had a baby. 

 

Images of Donna’s swollen belly, a chubby cheeked little boy with hazel eyes and strawberry blonde hair, tiny coos and giggles as Harvey blew raspberries on his belly all whipped through his mind, and suddenly he couldn’t hear. It was as if the world around him was drowned out and he could physically hear the blood swirling in his ears and draining from his face as a cold sweat broke out on his forehead. He was having a panic attack, he could feel it, but there was nothing he could do to stop it. 

 

He’d stood up quickly, pushing his chair back with a thud against the wall as he rushed to the bathroom, sinking to his knees and emptying the contents of his stomach into the toilet. 

 

Mike had come in soon after him, calling his name. He’d seen him run down the hall, saw the look on his face and recognized it from years ago. 

 

They’d gone back to Harvey’s office, him confiding in his friend that he was grieving this loss more than he’d given himself credit (or time) for. He’d been trying so hard to get Donna to feel better that he hadn’t focused on himself. “I just want her to be okay,” he admitted.

 

That was when he decided to call Stan Lipschitz, needing someone to talk to that wasn’t so close to him. He couldn’t be completely honest about his feelings with Mike, knowing that just wasn’t in his nature to open up like that with anyone but Donna. 

 

“I just feel like I’m falling apart, too,” he confessed over FaceTime to the older man. “I’ve always known that when you love someone you have to face the fact that you could lose them,” he sighed, running a palm over his jaw. “I may not have been able to hold our baby, but I still knew them somehow, and this loss just…” he trailed off, eyes flicking to the ceiling to control the wetness growing in them. He shrugged, looking back to Stan with a defeated sigh.

 

The psychologist nodded slowly, carefully contemplating his words like always. “I think that is a very natural reaction to what you’ve been through,” Stan finally told him. 

 

Harvey sighed, dragging his hand down his face, scratching at his stubble. “I just,” he started, pausing to collect himself as he felt the emotion take over. He swallowed around a lump as he admitted that he blames himself for the miscarriage. 

 

“Why’s that?” Stan asked, his calming gaze staring back at Harvey through the phone. 

 

He inhaled in a calculated manner before releasing the breath. “I was too stubborn. Too much of an idiot to realize years ago how much I love her.” His words came flowing out of him, unable to stop as he rambled, “if I’d just seen what was right in front of me, just accessed those feelings sooner , then Donna and I could’ve been married a long time ago. She could’ve gotten pregnant sooner, when we were younger and it wasn’t such a risk and,” he stopped, panting heavily as he fought the tears from filling his eyes. He slumped back into his desk chair, giving Stan a dejected look. 

 

Stan sat there, silently, contemplating his words. “I think blaming yourself is not the best route to take. You’ve said yourself before that you simply weren’t ready in the past to have this serious of a relationship.” Harvey nodded, knowing he was right. “Perhaps a decade ago, you could have been with Donna but it wouldn’t have worked out.”

 

His initial reaction was to balk at that, knowing he and Donna never would have split up. But, he thought, remembering his old ways, how he never committed to anyone, always too afraid of getting serious and then getting left for another man thanks to his childhood insecurities, that Stan was probably correct. Sighing in defeat, Harvey looked back to the doctor, saying that he was right. He would’ve done something back then to screw it up. He wasn’t ready. “That still doesn’t make me feel any less guilty,” he conceded softly.

 

“Have you talked to Donna about these feelings?”

 

He shook his head with a scowl, his temper flaring as he reminded the doctor what his wife was going through. “I can’t burden her with my guilt.”

 

Stan’s head tilted to the side, pondering Harvey’s response. “And why do you feel like it would be a burden?”

 

He sighed, telling the older man that she was dealing with enough right now, trying to cope with the loss in her own way. “Don’t you think, as a couple, you could be coping with it together?”

 

Like always, Harvey was left dumbfounded and questioning all of his decisions in life after talking with Dr. Lipschitz. He decided to start meeting with Stan once a week via FaceTime for a while, and thought it might be a good idea to get Donna to do the same when she was ready. 

 

For now, though, he would call Stan while at work, not wanting Donna to know, for he knew she would somehow blame herself for him needing therapy again. 

 

One night, a few weeks later, Harvey walks into their apartment. He’d stayed at work late, trying to finish up some paperwork so he could go in a little later tomorrow. 

 

Harvey walks in, placing his keys on the counter, his surprise for Donna tiptoeing behind him. 

 

He makes his way down the hall and into their bedroom. She walks out of their bathroom, a towel planted atop her head, and smiles softly when she sees him. She’s been better over the last five weeks, but there’s still a disconnect in her eyes. That light that made her so vibrant is still squashed beneath a dark cloud of sadness. He understands that feeling, not feeling quite like himself either since it happened.

 

Grinning at how small she looks in yoga pants and an oversized t-shirt of his, he wraps his arms around her when she gets to him, placing a kiss to her lips. 

 

She gives him an uneasy smile, biting down on her lip. “I realized while I was in the shower what today is,” she sighs dejectedly, looking up at him with mournful eyes.

 

He nods. He’d been hoping all day that she would be too busy with work to remember. It was the reason he had a surprise waiting for her in the living room.

 

“We would’ve found out the sex of our baby,” she whispers, tears welling in her eyes. She twists her lips, trying to tamp down the tears, forcing them away like she’s gotten so good at doing lately.  

 

Harvey nods again, pulling her closer. Her arms wrap around him, hands landing on his shoulder blades as she inhales his scent, her nose tucking into his chest. “I know,” he murmurs, kissing the top of her head. “I had a session with Stan today and told him about it.”

 

Donna pulls back, a confused look on her face, and, fuck, he realizes what he’s just said. “Stan?” she asks, taking a step back. “You’ve been talking with him?”

 

Hesitantly, Harvey admits that, yes, he’s been having weekly sessions with the doctor ever since they lost the baby. “I had a panic attack at work,” he states, looking down at the floor. His eyes trail back up to hers, and he tries to not feel his heart crack at the hurt that crosses her face at his confession. “I called Stan right after, told him what we were going through, and I’ve been calling him ever since.”

 

He shrugs, saying he was going to tell her, but he was just having a hard time and thought therapy would help for the time being. It’d helped him so much in the past. It’s a fact they rarely talk about, because mentioning therapy leads to thoughts of Paula, and neither one of them particularly enjoys that train of thought, but he’s told her before how his few sessions with Stan back in New York had helped him have some revelations about himself. 

 

Donna nods in understanding, reaching up to wipe a traitorous tear from her cheek. “I’m sorry you couldn’t talk to me,” she whimpers, a small, breathy cry escaping her. 

 

He pulls her into his arms, comforting her as he promises he wanted to. “I just knew how upset you were, and I wanted you to deal with your own emotions first before I burdened you with mine, you know?”

 

Her head shakes, lost to her own thoughts. He watches as her eyes widen, then shrink back to their regular size, a million thoughts ghosting across her face in the span of a few seconds. “I feel like this was my first big test at being a good wife, and I completely failed,” she sniffles, more tears falling from her eyes. 

 

He can see the guilt consuming her, and he’s quick to assure her that he would’ve needed Stan either way. “You did nothing wrong, do you hear me?” He pulls her even closer, arms holding her in a tight embrace as he strokes the back of her hair, kissing the top of her head.

 

She nods into his chest, sniffling once more. She pulls back with a groan, smiling sadly up at him. “I love you, you know that right?”

 

Smiling, he kisses her lips, letting his lips linger. He misses the feel of her. They’ve been breaking down the emotional wall they’d both put up since the incident, hands roaming and bringing each other pleasure, mouths kissing and tasting, but stopping short of going all the way. He loves the feel of her lips on his, though, that’s something they haven’t struggled with. Their kisses always seeming like an anchor as they drifted through the choppy waters of grief side by side but unable to fully reach each other. “Of course I do. And I love you, too.”

 

He takes her hand, pulling her toward the door with a grin and a glimmer in his eyes. “What are you doing?” she giggles, and his heart soars. He has only heard her laugh a few times over the last few weeks, and each time it happens, it’s like a symphony to his soul. 

 

“I have a surprise for you.”

 

She looks at him skeptically, eyes narrowing as a smirk finds its way to her lips. 

 

He pulses his hand in hers, guiding her down the hall and into the living room and hoping his surprise is a good distraction from her turmoil.

 

{*************************}

 

A smile shines on her face when she sees Mike and Rachel waiting in the living room, four glasses of wine sitting on the coffee table. Rachel holds one up, extending it out to her. “We brought wine!”

 

Donna chuckles under her breath, shaking her head at her best friend’s enthusiasm. She looks to Harvey, leaning in to peck his lips, before stepping over to Rachel and accepting the drink.

 

Mike claps Harvey on the back, asking if they’re ready to go.

 

Eyebrows cinching, she turns to face her husband. “Go? Go where?”

 

His eyes brighten, that excited look he gets when he’s close to exclaiming, I got you! since he so rarely gets the opportunity to pull one over on her. She smirks, eyes flipping over to Mike as they narrow, before going back to his. “Jet Improv,” he announces, grabbing a glass of wine. He takes a sip, letting her know this is just their pre-game. “Marvin will be here soon to pick us up.”

 

She smiles brightly, knowing they’re in for a fun night. Marvin, Harvey’s new driver on the few occasions he uses a chauffeur now, is always a delight, and she’s heard good things about this comedy club from people at the gym. 

 

The four of them finish their wine before heading out, joining Marvin downstairs to climb into the black town car. 

 

Laughter is a great remedy for sorrow, and the comedians performing tonight were just what the doctor ordered. They were sarcastic, some a bit crude, but all over the top hilarious. Donna can’t remember the last time she, or any of them, have laughed that hard. Several times she found herself clutching at Harvey’s arm, the other hand covering her mouth to hold in chest-aching guffaws. It was amazing. 

 

Harvey had clearly enjoyed himself as well, his eyes watering in delight as he chortled at the jokes. Mike was called up to the stage at one point, providing Rachel with enough embarrassment to last a lifetime and Harvey enough material to make fun of him until the next time the younger man did something idiotic. 

 

After dinner and the comedy hour, the four of them make their way back to Harvey and Donna’s apartment. 

 

Walking in, Donna hangs up her coat, joining everyone else in the living room. Harvey is on the couch, legs slightly spread, welcoming her to sit in between them. Donna sits on the floor, using the coffee table as an armrest as she sits, back situated between Harvey’s knees. Rachel is curled under a blanket on one end of the loveseat while Mike joins Donna on the ground, placing his glass of water on the table. 

 

They turn on a movie, snorting with laughter and talking as they enjoy the rest of the evening together. 

 

It’s nice, she has to admit, finally starting to feel like herself again. Tonight might not be that big of a deal to someone else, it’s just dinner and a show with friends, but it means the world to her. When she realized earlier that they would’ve found out the gender of their child today, she instantly felt guilty for not realizing it sooner, for not dwelling on it all day long like she thinks she should have. But spending time tonight, surrounded by the people she loves, is helping her see that that isn’t a way to live. 

 

“Oh, Louis is calling,” she announces, muting the television as she swallows the last sip of her wine Rachel had brought over before she sat down. 

 

Mike stands, taking everyone’s empty glasses to the kitchen to place them in the sink while Donna answers, putting the phone on speaker. 

 

“Hey, Louis,” she greets, sounding much happier than she has in weeks. 

 

Louis greets everyone when she lets him know that he’s on speaker phone. “I guess it’s a good thing you’re all there,” he discloses, his voice somber, “saves me a few phone calls.”

 

Mike comes back into the room, giving everyone a questioning look as they all silently wonder what Louis’ solemn tone is all about. Mike joins Rachel on the loveseat, while Donna slides up onto the couch with Harvey.

 

His arm drapes around her as she asks, “What’s wrong, Louis? Is everything okay?”

 

He heaves a loud exhale into the phone, saying he doesn’t know how to tell them this. Donna can hear tears in her best friend’s voice, and she instantly fears that something happened to her god-daughter. “Is Lucy okay?”

 

“Yeah,” he breathes, “yes,” he says again more firmly. “But Sheila isn’t.”

 

Rachel speaks up, asking him what’s wrong. It’s late in New York, almost one in the morning at this point, so they all fear what could warrant such a late call. “Sheila found out today that she has cancer.”

 

There’s a silence in the room as everyone stares at one another, Rachel’s hand flying to her mouth. Donna instantly goes into typical Donna-mode, asking questions like Are you okay? What type of cancer? What stage? What’s the prognosis?

 

Louis sighs again, answering her questions. Sheila had been feeling sick lately, waking up covered in sweat and losing too much weight, so she finally went to the doctor. They ran some tests and discovered she has Lymphoma. “Stage three,” he tells them somberly, the mood in the room shifting. 

 

“Louis,” Harvey breathes, squeezing Donna’s shoulder. “We’re all so sorry.”

 

Louis thanks them, letting them know that he’s trying to be positive. There’s still a good chance she can recover. “As far as cancers go, she got one that’s pretty cureable, thank God.”

 

They all nod, everyone clearly hoping that he’s right. They all know Louis wouldn’t be able to handle it if his wife passed away. Donna wants to hug him so tightly right now, knows he’s scrunching his face on the other side of the phone trying to hold back his tears like he always does. “I love you, Louis,” she tells him, and they can all hear the light sob that he lets out. 

 

Donna promises that she’ll call him tomorrow, they can even FaceTime if he wants to, and they tell him to give Sheila their love before hanging up. 

 

A collective sigh radiates throughout the room as they all try to find something to say. Life seems to be kicking most of them in the teeth lately, and they aren’t sure how to process it all.

 

“Well,” Mike says after a long pause, coughing slightly, “Louis really knows how to bring a party down.”

 

Miiike ,” they all groan, Rachel hitting his chest with a roll of her eyes. 

 

Harvey and Donna shake their heads, trying not to smirk at his immaturity. Leave it to Mike to use humor to diffuse a tense situation. It works, though, somehow. Everyone spends another moment thinking about their friends back home before the mood changes. They discuss the latest happenings with the oil company case, and Donna informs them of a new policy change she’s thinking of implementing. 

 

The four talk a little longer, deciding they need to plan a trip out to New York to visit and help Louis should things go badly, and before long, the Ross’ are standing to leave. 

 

Rachel gives Donna a hug, rubbing her back and saying they need to have a girls’ day soon. Donna smiles, thankful for her friendship and agrees. “Maybe we can even go mudding,” the redhead quips, eyebrows bouncing in mock-delight. 

 

Giggling, Rachel agrees, saying, “We’ll think of something.”

 

Mike leans in, giving Donna a hug as Rachel hugs Harvey goodnight. 

 

As he closes the door, Donna wraps her arms around Harvey’s middle from behind, kissing his shoulder blade. “Thank you for inviting them over.”

 

He smiles, turning to face her. “You’re welcome,” he says proudly, pressing a kiss to her lips. 

 

She deepens it, sighing into it as she realizes they haven’t actually had sex since the night of her miscarriage. She misses her husband, misses feeling connected to him in that way, and knows tonight she’ll remedy that situation.

 

Looking around the kitchen to make sure it’s clean, Donna asks if he’s ready to go to bed. He agrees, and they make their way down the hallway, Harvey turning out the lights in the living room as they go. 

 

Once in their room, they both change for bed, Donna pulling the yoga pants and t-shirt from earlier back on while Harvey slips into a pair of navy blue and green plaid pants and a gray t-shirt. They make their way into the bathroom, both going to their respective sinks to go through their nightly routines. 

 

“I was thinking,” she states around a mouthful of toothpaste. She spits the minty goo into the sink, making a mumbled sound and holding up a finger to let him know to wait while she rinses her mouth out. Harvey smirks, wrapping the floss around his fingers and beginning the process of cleaning his teeth. 

 

Cupping her hands under the water, she washes her mouth out, swishing the water around before finishing. She turns off the water, shaking the remaining water off her hands with a flick of her fingers. “That maybe… I should… call Stan, too,” she finished hesitantly. 

 

Donna glances over, catching Harvey’s eye in the mirror. He nods, a small, lazy smile that only lifts one corner of his mouth, “I think that’s a great idea.”

 

She smiles sadly, her eyes misting over before she blinks it away. She reaches for the hand towel hanging by the sink, drying her mouth and hands. “I want to learn to deal with this and feel… normal… again, you know?”

 

He agrees, tossing the floss into the trash can and saying it’s really been helpful. “He’s encouraged me to open up to you, so he might want us to do some joint sessions as well.”

 

She sighs, sliding onto the bathroom counter as Harvey finishes his brushing his teeth. He places his toothbrush back into the holder, grinning over at her. He steps in between her opened legs, leaning down to kiss her soundly. “That would be great,” she proclaims, pressing her lips to his again. 

 

His hands caress up and over her thighs, causing that familiar tingle to travel through her core, making her want him even more than she already did. Donna wraps her hands around his shoulders as her ankles hook behind his back, drawing him as close as possible. She can feel his hardness pressed against her and moans, wanting him right here on the bathroom counter. 

 

She smirks as they draw apart, breaths mingling between the small space between their lips before she latches onto him again. Trailing her lips down then back up his neck, Donna sucks at his jaw. Her teeth move to nibble at his earlobe, chuckling hotly into his ear when he murmurs something about being glad their countertops are the perfect height for this. 

 

That night, they make love over and over. It’s tender, but raw, and passionate. It’s the first time she’s let him inside of her since they lost the baby, and she has to hold back tears of love and passion as he comes in her, panting out her name. She loves this man, her soulmate, loves the life they’ve started building together, and she comes on his tongue, then his cock multiple times, the pair wasting the night away, making up for lost time. 

 

She lays tangled in his arms in the early hours of the morning, skin cooling from all of their love making, and thinks about what Louis is going through. Donna pulls Harvey’s arm that’s draped over her middle even tighter, wrapping herself in his warm embrace. He noses at the back of her neck, making goosebumps rise on her skin as she grins at the feeling. 

 

As she lies there, relishing her husband’s soft kisses that he mindlessly presses to her shoulder, she’s thankful that no matter what losses they have experienced, she still has Harvey there to help her through it all. 

 

She may still feel a little broken, but she’s realized over the last month that maybe it’s okay to feel that way. It’s okay to not be totally okay. She’s grieving the loss of someone that no one else knew, but she knew deeply, intimately, and she needs time to mourn and go through the stages of grief. Sessions with Stan will be good, they will help her learn to live her life again to the fullest like she’s always done. 

 

Donna rolls over to face him, pressing a kiss above Harvey’s heart. She stares at his sleeping form, once again grateful that she ended up with him after all this time. He’s her rock through all hard things–almost going to prison in the past, her more recent fears of moving, her miscarriage, all of it. He’s by her side, and she’s by his, just like they always have been. 

 

{**************************}

 

Author’s Note: I know this was probably hard for some people to read, but just trust me. Things have to be sad/emotional before they get better. Hopefully y’all stick with me and this story to get to the happier moments! Lol… Such as life, not everything is going to be all rainbows and sunshine, but Donna and Harvey have one another to get through it all - the good and the bad!

 

Trigger warnings: miscarriage, cancer 

 

Please review! :)

Chapter Text

Chapter Four:

"How's Sheila?" Donna asks into the phone, sitting down at her desk. She'd been working later today, it's almost six at this point, but she wanted to get her office wide memos done so she didn't have to come in early tomorrow.

Louis sighs, but she can hear a slight smile in his voice. "She's doing better." He tells her that she had another round of chemo yesterday, so she was resting at home today, not wanting to push herself.

It's been a little over a month since Louis called to let them know of his wife's diagnosis, and Donna has been trying her best to contact Louis each week to check in.

"That's good," she murmurs, shuffling some papers around.

"She's doing great with her treatments," Louis hums into the phone, going silent for a moment before, "And… how are you?"

She stops her movements at his tone, nerves skittering through her belly and across her skin. Her skin prickles, a knot in her stomach forming just like it does every time she thinks about her miscarriage. Closing her eyes, Donna inhales deeply, slowly, letting it out through her mouth. She's learned to deal with the anxiety that came after it happened, Stan helping her with different techniques, and these deep breaths often helped calm her when her worry flared up. She hadn't told Louis of her miscarriage, not wanting to burden him with her grief on top of his own struggles. "What do you mean? I'm fine."

Hearing him sigh, she shifts in her chair. He reveals that Harvey had said something on the phone the other day that seemed… off, like she'd gone through something recently. He felt out of the loop, and he didn't know if it was because of being across the country or if he'd just been in his own world dealing with Sheila's cancer.

Donna sets down her multi-colored pen, exhaling slowly. "I was… pregnant," she admits softly, closing her eyes.

Her sessions with Stan, which he'd bumped up to twice a week after their first session, were going really well. Donna was learning to deal with her loss and be herself again. The nightmares she'd been having were subsiding and things were looking up.

Her relationships with the people around her were stronger than ever. She'd discovered that she had built these walls around herself, for longer than she even knew, always more guarded when it came to her own emotions. She was always willing to help others and give her advice to try and help them, but being open and honest about how she was feeling was a whole different ball game. She came to realize that, while she was open with Harvey, she still held back in some aspects. It came from a deep rooted fear due to her dad's issues that he's dealt with since Donna was a teenager. She put so much faith in him, and he continued to disappoint her no matter how much she loved him, so she was afraid Harvey would do the same.

It had stunned her during a phone session with the doctor, rocking her to the core when she realized even Harvey had picked up on it, mentioning it the last time her dad came to visit when she and Harvey were at the beginning of their relationship.

But she was learning to be more open, more vulnerable, especially with her husband. She felt like she was more open with Harvey than anyone, always had been, but there was a new depth to their communication that brought them even closer, if that was even possible. She could feel the foundations of those heavily built walls crumbling with each passing day, building the pathway to a stronger marriage with him than their parents ever had.

"Was?" Louis asks hesitantly.

She smiles at the carefully worded question, nodding, then realizing he can't see her. "Yeah," she sighs, recounting that they were pregnant but lost the baby at thirteen weeks. "It was really… hard," she confesses, "and we're still obviously dealing with it, but Harvey and I have both been meeting with Stan together and separately, and he's really helping."

"Good," Louis states proudly, the smile in his voice making her chuckle.

She agrees, standing from her chair. She closes her laptop and stuffs it into her briefcase, deciding doing this last bit of work on the couch next to Harvey is better than sitting here alone. Collecting her things, Donna admits to Louis that she was extremely distraught after it happened, but things were much better now. She clicks off the desk lamp, listening as Louis encourages her, saying that's great to hear.

Donna holds the phone between her ear and shoulder, hoisting her purse onto her shoulder. She takes the phone in her now free hand, and explains to him how she and Harvey had implemented their weekly date nights again and were both going to the gym. She had found an amazing yoga studio, and their gym also offered boxing classes for him. "We're actually planning a weekend get away soon," she says with a smile.

Louis laughs, suggesting they come visit New York, and she grins. "We thought about it," she relents, "but I think we might save that for another trip. We want to go somewhere just the two of us."

She climbs into the elevator as Louis says he has to go. She demands he give Lucy lots of kisses for her and Uncle Harvey, and he promises he will. They send their love for each other before hanging up, and she smiles to herself, glad to know Sheila is getting the help she needs and Louis seems to be doing better than the last time they talked.

Once home, she sniffs the air, stomach growling at the delicious smell emanating from the kitchen. "Hey, you," she greets, placing her jacket on the entryway rack and walking into the kitchen.

Donna wraps her arms around Harvey's middle, leaning onto her tiptoes to peer over his shoulder.

He smirks, turning his head to kiss her cheek. "Hey, there."

Informing her that he's making spaghetti, she moans, eyes closing at the thought. It's one of Harvey's best dishes, and now she's extra excited she came home earlier than planned. "Is this why you left at five?"

She peeks at the sauce bubbling on the stove once more before taking a step back, moving toward the refrigerator and grabbing a bottle of water.

Harvey chuckles, wiping his hands on a dishtowel and turning to face her. He rests his butt against the counter, arms crossing over each other. "I realized that we hadn't planned our date night this week, so I figured I'd make date night at home this time." He shrugs, explaining that he had to run and get one more ingredient, and he wanted to finish before she got home. "You're home earlier than I thought," he says, walking over to kiss her.

She wraps her arms around his neck, placing her lips to his as well, pulling him into her embrace. Smiling into the contact, she nods, informing Harvey about her conversation with Louis. "I told him about the baby," she states solemnly, "but it was nice to finally let him in."

Harvey smiles, kissing her again before walking back to the stove.

"I also figured I'd finish my work here with you instead of in the office," she smirks, patting him on the rear.

"Good plan," he grins, wiggling his eyebrows.

She grins, turning to set the bottle of water down on the counter and inform him that she's going to go change her clothes. He makes a joke about helping out if she needs any, to which she just rolls her eyes, giggling as she makes her way down the hallway.

{**************************}

Donna pulls her hair to one side, coming out from the bedroom. He's already in sweatpants and a t-shirt, a look he knows she finds beyond attractive (her words, not his), so he makes sure to change into it after work as often as possible.

She's put on teal yoga pants and a long sleeve shirt, one of his worn in Harvard ones, and his insides go all buttery soft at the image before him. She's so sexy no matter what she wears, those dresses for work always turning him on, but there's something so… domestic and adorable about her lounge wear, especially when she wears one of his shirts.

They eat together at the table, feet playing with one another's as they make plans for their upcoming weekend away. "I was thinking Vermont?" he suggests, telling her there's a resort and spa that a client told him was amazing.

She smiles and agrees, but then adds, "Do we want to go all the way across the country just for a spa? We could do that here."

Laughing, he agrees, then takes out his phone, searching for places to go. He wants something nice, something where they can relax and enjoy some time away. Things have been so stressful lately, especially with losing the baby, so he wants to make sure she's happy with wherever they choose to go. "What about Napa Valley? We could go do some wine tastings at the vineyards."

Donna's eyes light up, moving from her chair to his, sitting in his lap as her arms loop around his neck. He smiles, loving having her so close. His arm drapes around her hip, other hand still scrolling through pictures of different vineyards on his phone. She leans her head against the side of his, looking at his phone screen, too. They google vineyards to go to, resorts to stay at, and spas to visit (or at least for Donna, she will be getting a facial, she declares with a grin).

"I think this looks like an amazing weekend," she beams, kissing him on the lips. He tilts his head as she deepens it, scratching her nails through his hair. God, he loves the feel of her fingers on his skin.

He moans at the contact, pulling her closer. She shifts then, moving so she is straddling his lap, grinding her hips down against him and, fuck, hardening his cock with the movement. "When do you want to go?" he pants between their parted lips.

She kisses him again, tongue peeking out, before pulling back just far enough to whisper, "Doesn't matter, as long as we go. But not this weekend," she grins, "we have dinner with Mike and Rachel."

He smirks, a hand moving from her hips to her hair, tangling in her red locks. She moves her hips, moaning at the feel of his hardness between their bodies. Harvey runs kisses down her neck, tongue licking at her freckled skin. He nips at her collar bone before peppering kissing along it, then moving back up to meet her mouth. Lips smack as they pull apart, Donna leaning back to look down into his eyes. Her eyes are full of lust, and fuck, he loves her so much. She moves her hand down, toying with the hem of his cotton shirt. It makes goosebumps rise on his skin, causing him to shudder in the best of ways. Harvey grins at her, knowing she's feeling smug for that little action, and bounces his eyebrows up at her. Donna's finger traces along the band of his sweatpants and boxers before she dips her hand inside, circling his length. Her hand is warmed from being caught between their bodies moments ago, and the heat feels nice, makes his cock twitch at the contact when she pumps her hand up and down, up and down, slowly, torturing him for her own amusement.

His eyes fall shut momentarily as his head dips back before he rights himself, watching her as she works her hand around his cock. He swallows thickly, wanting to touch her.

Harvey squeezes her hips, then moves one hand to her t-shirt. His hand sneaks inside, moving up slowly from her stomach to her chest. She has a sports bra on, but it's loose enough that he can wiggle his hand inside, tweaking her nipple. He feels it harden under his ministrations, and he grins wolfishly as Donna leans down to kiss him feverishly. It's sloppy, the position a little awkward with her hand working his cock, his hand on her breast, while she still straddles him in the dining room chair, but he won't stop this for anything, won't interrupt when he can already feel the coil of pleasure building in the base of his stomach. "Donna," he sighs between kisses, her hand twisting around his member, thumb rubbing his tip.

He can feel the bead of precum forming, and her hand speeds up, taking him closer to the edge. Christ, he's going to come right here in his sweat pants if they don't take this somewhere else soon. Suddenly, she stops, huffing and mumbling something about this chair not being big enough.

Harvey chuckles, his head tipping back when she tells him to move the chair back further from the table. He does, wondering what her plan is. But then she's sinking to her knees, a grin plastered to her face as she spreads his legs apart, making room for her, and a moan escapes him at the thought of her lips around him.

Donna licks her lips, hands tugging at his sweatpants. He lifts his butt, giving her more room as he helps slide the pants and boxers just far enough that his cock springs free. She smirks up at him before placing a kiss to his tip, making his cock jump.

She works him up with her hand, giving him a handful of more pumps before her lips close around him. She works her tongue down his length, licking at the vein that runs along his length. And fuck, fuckfuckfuck fuck, he loves the feel of her mouth on him, when she's completely in control, God, he loves her so much. She swoops down as one hand comes up, cupping his balls, massaging them and making his hips buck. Her mouth clenches on him and she makes a surprised gagged sound, and he apologizes quickly, knowing that thrust of his hips was unexpected. "Shit," he hisses, squirming in his chair, trying to control his movements, "Sorry, babe."

He can feel her smirk around him, and he looks down, watching as her head bobs up and down, changing speeds to play with him. "God, Donna," he moans, his hands gripping her hair, not hard enough to guide her, she doesn't need any direction, just wanting to feel her beneath him.

She hums, the sound vibrating against him, which sends a jolt through his body. He's close, and he tells her so, panting, "I'm almost th-there," into the dining room.

Her teeth lightly drag against his flesh, and fuck, that feels amazing. Her one hand is still massaging his balls while the other is gripped onto his thigh, anchoring herself to him. His hands stroke through her hair, gripping at the back of her head. She groans at that, nodding her encouragement as she sucks him harder.

Donna flicks her tongue at his tip before sucking him back inside, and with four more forceful sucks on her part, he comes undone, hips thrusting into her mouth as he shouts her name while the pleasure overcomes him. She continues to bob up and down just to the point of oblivion, and when he can't take it anymore she swallows his seed in her mouth.

She pulls back, wiping her mouth off as he sits there, slumped in the chair completely jelly limbed.

With a breathy giggle, Donna stands and reaches out a hand. "Come on," she smirks, "Let's go finish this somewhere that isn't our dining room chair… not enough room."

He laughs, standing as his cock grows soft. He pulls his pants up, hands grazing up her smooth calves as he stands. He presses her against the table, kissing her hotly. His tongue seeks entrance, and she grants it, their hands tangled in each other's hair. He can taste the remnants of himself in her mouth, and, well, it isn't a pleasant taste, but mixed with the wine and her glorious tongue, he doesn't mind it. He'd accept that taste any day if it meant he got to kiss his wife like this.

His hands find purchase on her hips, walking her back toward the table. Not wanting to move any further, Harvey slides the plates they'd eaten from to the other end of the table, hoisting her onto it.

Donna yelps, a giggle escaping her at the sudden movement. "Harvey!" she laughs huskily, pulling him closer.

He removes her yoga pants, returning the favor from moments ago with his tongue. He has her writhing and moaning for him atop the wooden table, his name being whimpered out as she comes on his tongue moments later with her hands gripping at his shoulders.

They finally make it into the bedroom later that night after cleaning their dishes (and table top), tangling themselves in each other's limbs once again before finally drifting off to sleep, satisfied and completely naked.

{******************************}

That weekend, Donna joins Rachel for a shopping spree. They were both in need of some new clothes, not for any particular reason other than wanting to treat themselves after a long few weeks at work.

The oil company case had taken more energy from everyone at the firm than originally planned. The company had fought them tooth and nail, burying them in documents and frivolous motions.

The girls walk into the Paulsen-Specter apartment, giggling over something that happened hours ago.

"What's so funny?" Mike asks, looking up from his spot in the kitchen.

Donna and Rachel stop mid-step, mouths falling agape as they spy their husbands both wearing aprons and preparing a meal. "Uh," Rachel stammers, blinking rapidly and shaking her head. "Just a joke this old man told us earlier–what is going on here?" She waves her hand in the direction of the kitchen as they both make their way to the island.

Donna smirks, knowing Harvey is actually a great cook, but she assumes by Rachel's reaction that Mike is not. Still, though, its amusing to see both men in aprons that read Kiss the Chef or I'll sue with Harvey's laptop opened on the kitchen island.

She sits in one of the barstools, elbows leaning on the island countertop. She peers over at the screen, noticing it's a cooking channel tutorial they have paused. Her eyes flick to Harvey's, a small grin already on his face. "Taking lessons?" she smirks, nodding toward the screen.

Mike looks sheepish as Harvey chuckles, saying, "We wanted to surprise the two of you for once!"

"Oh, I'm surprised alright!" Rachel exclaims, patting Mike's hand across the counter.

The brunette looks to Donna, both smirking. Harvey pours them each a glass of wine, kissing the top of Donna's head as he hands it to her.

She smiles small, eyes softening at how adorable he really is.

"You alright?" he asks softly, just loud enough for her to hear.

She takes the glass from his hand, glancing over to Rachel who is still teasing Mike about him watching a tutorial. She smirks at the younger pair, then looks back to Harvey, giving him a brief smile. Nodding, she assures him, "I'm fine." She pecks his lips, then squeezes his hand before stepping back, knowing he can read her better than anyone.

Grateful for her husband like always, she kisses him again, thanking him for the drink as she takes a sip. She'd had a moment earlier while out shopping–a woman had walked past them, hand firmly on her pregnant belly as she perused the aisles. Donna had stopped dead in her tracks, an image of how round her own belly would have been by now coming to the forefront. She would have been about six months pregnant at this point, and sometimes, no matter how well she's doing, it hits her at how different their life would be in this moment if she were still pregnant. Sure, they'd still be having family dinners with Mike and Rachel, but the wine would be a no-go for her. They'd be setting up a nursery instead of planning vacations. Little things would just be… different. Not that she doesn't love the life she and Harvey have, but still...

Grief is a weird feeling, especially when you're grieving someone that no one else knew or even knew about. She was proud of herself, though. When she saw the lady, instead of having a panic attack like she fears she would have had months ago, she simply took deep breaths, reminding herself of all the good things she did have in life. It was another technique Stan had taught her, helping her see that life wasn't completely over. She'd just shaken it off, breathing smoothly and reminding herself she had things in life that could still be celebrated–a loving husband, a great job, a new apartment, wonderful friends… the list went on and on.

And this dinner tonight, she thinks, is definitely one of them. She brings herself back to reality, and makes her way to the living room with Rachel, both of them laughing as Harvey calls out, "At least we didn't burn anything yet. Well… I didn't."

"Hey! You said you weren't going to tell them that."

Donna looks to Rachel with a bemused expression, her eyes going wide as she mocks Mike. "Did you catch something in my new apartment on fire?"

The puppy's eyes look stunned, glancing down at the dish he's preparing before looking back up to her with a shrug. "Sorry, Mom," he chuckles, "It was just some chicken. Nothing else, I swear!"

Mom. The term sends a shock to her heart for the briefest of seconds, but she knows Mike has always jokingly referred to her and Harvey as his parents, so she brushes it off, letting the pain in her chest subside as she chuckles. Her eyes quickly lock with Harvey's, she can tell he'd looked up from his portion of the cooking to check on her as soon as the term left Mike's mouth, but she just shakes her head and give him a faint smile, silently conveying to him that it's okay. She flicks her gaze over to Mike, eyes narrowing as she glares at the younger man playfully. "Alright then…"

Rachel snickers into her wine glass, eyes glancing to her husband across the room then back to Donna. "He needs to take some more lessons from Harvey in the kitchen."

Donna grins, agreeing.

"I'll have you know," Mike says, pointing his spatula in their direction. "I spent days watching these tutorials so I could make a nice home cooked meal for you ladies."

Donna and Rachel smile over at him, thanking him for his hard work. She really is touched; it was a nice change to their usual restaurant dinners. And it was cute to see the guys in their aprons, trying to concoct a meal worthy of praise from Rachel, the foodie of the group.

Her eyes scan over to Harvey whom she notices is doing more observing than cooking. "And what was your contribution to all of this?" she asks, standing to walk over to the record player.

She places one of Gordon's jazz records on, swaying her hips on her way back to the couch. She turns it down low enough that Mike can still hear his YouTube video when he needs it, but having the saxophone sounds verberating throughout the apartment is nice, relaxing.

Harvey snorts, propelling himself from where he's been propped on the kitchen counter. He takes a few steps closer to the living room, one hand landing on the kitchen counter as he points from Mike to the women. "I was making sure he didn't burn the place down."

Everyone laughs before Harvey adds that he made the pasta salad that's already in the refrigerator and also the strawberry pie. Donna's stomach gurgles at the mention of the pie. It's one he'd learned from his mom years ago, and she always inhales it when he makes it. It's delicious, and she divulges to Rachel that she's in for a treat.

She smiles at him, knowing he'd helped more than they were giving him credit for. Harvey is an excellent cook, so she's positive he gave Mike pointers before she and Rachel got home.

He sends her a wink, one that makes her knees go weak, and she returns the favor, a smirk growing on her lips as she reads his apron once more. She'll definitely be kissing one of the chefs later tonight.

{*****************************}

Hours pass, and the four of them find themselves in the living room. He loves this about their new apartment–it's homey and welcoming, and they often spend evenings with Mike and Rachel here.

He and Donna are both on the couch, a cushion apart because Donna claimed he was a cheater and would try to look at her cards, causing him to smirk because she was right. Mike is on the opposite loveseat, while Rachel is snuggled onto the large ottoman at the foot of the table with a blanket draped across her lap, keeping her cards close to her chest as well as he spies Mike trying to peak at his wife's cards, too. Like father like son, he muses.

Harvey's hand rests against Donna's knee as she swipes another card from the stack, reading off the prompt for Cards Against Humanity. "What do old people smell like?"

Everyone chuckles at the question, searching through their white cards to pick the best one. He knew they'd end up playing this game tonight, so before the girls got home, he'd purposely taken out the Dead babies card, not wanting to make anything awkward no matter how much better they were doing with what happened.

Everyone places their cards into the stack, Donna mixing them up before reading each one out. "Alcoholism, the blood of Christ, nothing, and daddy's credit card," she reads with a chuckle. They all guffaw at the results, Rachel howling with excitement when her card, daddy's credit card, is finally chosen.

Rachel squeals giddily, reaching for her black card. Reading it out, they then all look for the best answer to "I drink to forget…." and the game goes on, one ridiculous answer after the other, causing all of them to burst into fits of laughter.

They empty another bottle of wine, all chattering on about needing to decorate for Christmas that's coming up in a few weeks, how they need to plan a trip to New York all together, as well as finishing up the game, Mike being declared the winner when he chooses "the size of my penis" to answer the prompt, "During sex, I like to think about..."

After another two hours of roaring laughter and watching a movie, they finally stand, Harvey's knees popping at the movement. Donna stretches her back, confessing to the group that she can't wait for her and Harvey's trip so she can get a massage.

Rachel smiles, revealing that she's jealous they're going away and gives Mike a knowing look. Mike simply grins, assuring her not to worry. They'll get their romantic weekend one day, too.

Harvey smirks, knowing Mike already has one planned for them in a few weeks. He's planning on telling Rachel about it while he and Donna are away next weekend as an early Christmas gift.

They make their way to the front door, everyone hugging each other goodbye. Mike looks to Harvey saying, "Thanks for all your help today."

He grins, nodding his head and telling the younger man that he's welcome. "You're welcome to get cooking tips from me anytime."

"Oh, good!" Rachel squeals, clapping her hands together. "Dinner was delicious, and it would be so helpful if someone else in the house could cook." She gives Mike a sassy look, causing Donna to snicker.

Saying goodnight once again, Donna closes the door and turns back to look at him. She's sleepy, he can tell, but there's also a lustful look in her eye.

His eyebrow cocks up, "Yes, Mrs. Specter?" he drawls, smirk blooming on his face.

She walks toward him, looping her arms around his neck and planting her lips against his. She pulls back with a moan, one hand cupping his cheek. She scratches at the stubble he's been growing there, and she smiles. "I had to kiss the chef like your apron said earlier."

He chuckles, jesting that she should've kissed Mike then. Donna's eyes widen dramatically, reaching for the door handle. "Oh," she gasps, "I better go catch him!"

"Alright, alright!" Harvey chortles, pulling her back toward him by her waist. "I cooked too, you can kiss me."

Smirking, she settles into his embrace, nodding. "Good," she declares sweetly, pecking her lips to his once more.

He laughs, taking her hand and leading her to the bedroom. Mike and Rachel had helped clean up, thankfully, so there was nothing that needed to be done except spend the rest of the evening worshipping his wife's body.

Later that night, after multiple orgasms and a satisfying shower, which consisted of soapy, wandering hands, they snuggle together in bed, wrapped in the warmth of each other and their comforter. They talk about the future, plans and dreams they have for them as a couple, and he intertwines their hands. "I love you," Donna whispers into his neck, and he smiles, a yawn escaping as he replies with a sincere, "I love you too."

They fall asleep, hands still linked together while he rests half on top of her, his nose buried in the crook of her neck where he can smell the scent of their love making and that aroma that is so uniquely Donna in his nostrils all night long.

It's the best possible way to drift into dreamland, and Harvey succumbs to the allure of slumber with a smile firmly planted on his face.

{*************************}

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Chapter Text

Chapter Five:

It's been almost three months since Mike and Harvey cooked for her and Rachel, and they'd only been able to get together a handful of times since that weekend. The girls dragged the guys to a play one night, went to dinner another… but their weekly family dinner nights had been slacking thanks to work at the firm.

The oil company case had finally ended, but their business is expanding, the reputation of the firm growing with each win they procured which kept them all a bit busier than they'd like. Having weekends off was one thing she loved about Seattle, but lately it seemed like they still had to go in on Saturday mornings, exhausting them before plans could be made with their best friends for that night.

Thankfully, that was changing tonight. Donna slips on a pair of earrings, walking out of their bedroom, down the hall and into the kitchen to wipe down the counters before they leave.

Things have been going as well as can be expected with her grieving process. It's been almost seven months since her miscarriage, and she and Harvey were still FaceTiming Stan for sessions. Instead of twice a week now, however, she was down to monthly check-ins. It's been nice, taking a break every few weeks to think solely about her mental health and focus on how she's doing.

Keeping busy with work was good, though. She and Harvey had also been entertaining themselves learning the ins and outs of their new city, exploring different museums and parks, as well as discovering some of the best restaurants in town. She'd joined a theatre group in their neighborhood, and while she hadn't gotten the lead in their newest production, she was able to get a small part which was good enough for her, for now. Harvey, Rachel and Mike were going to come on opening night in a few weeks, and she had a sneaking suspicion that her husband would somehow manage to come to a few other showings as well.

They'd pretty much gotten their apartment set up the way she wanted it (finally), but every now and then, Donna would sit and ponder, studying the flow of the living room to the kitchen and switch some things around, much to Harvey's bemused chagrin. He always humored her, however, diligently moving end tables or random knick knacks to her new desired spot in their home. She's organized the kitchen twice in the months they've been here, and she's lost count of the amount of times she's moved their couches around.

Sighing, Donna looks around the apartment with her hands on her waist, finally feeling at home in the space. She loves their apartment, completely satisfied they picked this abode back when they first visited. Their one year anniversary of living in Seattle would be coming up shortly after their first wedding anniversary here in the next few months, so she makes a mental note to plan something special for them.

"What are you thinking about?" Harvey asks with a grin, walking out of the bedroom to meet her. He slides his jacket on, kissing her cheek and pressing his nose to the crook of her neck.

She exhales a breathy giggle as his stubble rubs against her skin, loving that he's decided to keep the scruff since moving to Seattle. "Just thinking..." she trails off, a smile edging onto her lips as she turns to face her husband, wanting to keep her anniversary plans a secret for now.

"Oh, no." Harvey's eyes widen dramatically with the statement, taking a step back with his hands raised in surrender. "Are you going to make me move the couch again?"

"No," she giggles, rolling her eyes. "I am finally satisfied with where things are."

Harvey brings a hand to his heart, stumbling backward in mock-astonishment. "It's a miracle!" he shouts, deadpanning, "It only took eight months."

Snorting, she grabs his hand, trying to keep him close and shakes her head, promising him that she's happy. "For now," she winks, linking their fingers and pulling him into her arms.

"Good," he laughs, pecking a kiss to her lips. "Are you ready to go?"

Donna nods, retrieving her lightweight jacket off the kitchen island where she'd laid it earlier. It was March now, still not completely warmed from the winter, but not cold enough that they need their heavy jackets and scarves. It was a pleasant surprise in comparison to the biting cold New York always kept around until late into the spring each year.

Harvey grabs the keys, smiling to himself as he waggles his eyebrows, hoisting the keys up in the air to give then a clanking jiggle. She chuckles, shaking her head as she watches him act like a child opening up the birthday present they'd been longing for. He'd found a monthly car club in downtown Seattle right after Christmas, and he loved getting to drive her around in different sports cars every few weeks. "Did someone get a new car today?"

He jingles the keys again, the lines around his eyes creasing as he exclaims, "A vintage Aston Martin!" with that classic twinkle in his eye.

She smiles, snickering again at him as she slings her jacket onto her arms. "Alright, James Bond, lets go." Turning out the kitchen lights, she opens the front door. He smiles at her, that boyish grin that always makes her fall a little bit more in love with him, and takes her hand. She and Harvey make their way to the elevator, Donna's armed linked with his the whole ride down.

They make their way to Mike and Rachel's, the young brunette beaming brightly as she opens the door for them. It was nice to finally have a night where they could get together again. Mike and Harvey had promised them earlier in the week that no matter what, none of them would work today so they could get things done around their houses before getting together for dinner.

"Come on in!" Rachel squeals, opening the door wider as the couple steps in.

Harvey takes Donna's jacket, hanging it with his on the coat rack, smirking as he hears Mike making a comment about them coming empty handed. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but," he retorts, stepping into the living room, "you didn't bring anything last time you came to my apartment, no?"

Mike chuckles, shrugging sheepishly as he turns the volume down on the movie they'd been watching. "Hey! I cooked."

"Yeah," Harvey laughs, smacking Mike on his shoulder, "After I bought all of the groceries."

Rachel rolls her eyes at the guys, looking toward Donna. The girls settle next to each other on the couch, telling the redhead that dinner is almost here. "We ordered from Manao."

Donna's stomach growls at the mention of it, Thai food always being one of her favorites. "Yum, can't wait!"

Harvey grins over at her, and she chuckles, knowing he swears this place is far better than her shitty Thai place back home in New York. She'll never admit that he's right, but… it is pretty damn good.

The four settle into the living room, discussing their upcoming cases and the pain in the ass client Mike is stuck dealing with, the one he's been trying to pawn off onto Harvey, but he refuses to give in to the puppy's demands.

Donna regales Rachel and Mike with stories from her and Harvey's vineyard trip a few months ago. She's told Rachel bits and pieces, but she hasn't had a chance to tell her everything and in such detail. Rachel also tells the group about the trip Mike surprised her with for Christmas. They'd taken off to Hawaii for a week to ring in the new year, and Donna smiles listening to her friends excitedly tell them all about the dormant volcano they saw and resort they stayed at while Donna browses through the pictures she'd yet to see on Rachel's phone from the trip.

"It looks amazing," Donna gushes, looking to Harvey. "Maybe we need to add this to our bucket list."

Her husband just smirks, shaking his head before slyly replying loud enough for Mike to hear, "I'm not so sure we want to vacation in a place that allows ex-cons to visit."

The younger man simply rolls his eyes, scoffing out a dry ha, ha, before adding, "Well they'll certainly let a pussy like you into it, that's for sure."

"Oh, and you'd know all about resorts letting pussies in, wouldn't you?" Harvey replies with a lift to his brow, pointing toward Mike's Hawaiian print shirt in the last picture. "Tell me, was that the only shirt available, or were they only handing them out to the biggest pussies on the island?"

Mike's grin falters at that, his eyes growing wide as he defends, "Hey, I like that shirt!"

"Of course you do," Harvey snorts, shaking his head.

Mike hangs his head in mock shame while the rest of the group just snickers. "Oh, thank god," the blonde mumbles, standing from the couch at the sound of the door bell. "Saved by the bell… that's a television show, too, in case you were wondering, Grandpa."

Harvey rolls his eyes, and Donna smirks, knowing Harvey has definitely seen the show but would never admit that in front of Mike.

"See that's funny…" Mike calls out, making his way toward the front door, "... because you're too old to have enjoyed the comical genius that is Zack Morris." Before her husband can respond with a quick remark, Mike opens the front door, paying the delivery man and announcing to the others that dinner is here.

Rachel and Donna stand, Donna stretching out a hand toward Harvey. He looks up from his phone, grinning at her and taking her hand to stand from the cushions.

They make their way into the kitchen, Rachel helping Mike unload the food, while Donna gets the plates out and Harvey pours everyone a glass of water. Mike opens a bottle of wine, pulling out glasses and saying whoever wants a drink can help themselves to it.

They enjoy the meal, laughing and carrying on together. After an hour or so, Harvey makes mention that they should head home soon before it gets too late, they have a lot of work to do tomorrow to prepare for the upcoming week, and Donna nods.

She picks up her wine, taking a sip as she glances at Rachel. Her friend has an odd expression on her face, and Donna's brows scrunch, asking her friend what is the matter.

Rachel looks to Mike, then to Harvey before her eyes land on Donna's again. Mike's hand comes up from his lap, resting atop Rachel's as smiles begin to bloom on both of their faces. "We have some news we want to share with you guys," Mike tells the couple.

Donna smiles curiously, asking, "What's going on?" Their friends are both acting strange, but she can't quite figure it out, which is odd considering she's Donna. She takes a glance over to Harvey, who looks just as confused, then over to the couple.

Rachel takes a deep breath, "Well," she says, her hand moving to her stomach as a megawatt smile graces her features. Suddenly, her Donna senses kick into overdrive, and she knows immediately what her friend is going to say. "We're pregnant!"

Shit. She should have seen it coming. Rachel hadn't had any wine tonight, which Donna thought was odd, but honestly hadn't thought too much about it. She'd been sick the other week at work, claiming it was food poisoning, and come to think of it, Rachel had made mention all those months ago when she gave Donna her extra pregnancy test that they'd started trying. All the signs were there… maybe she just didn't want to acknowledge it.

Everything around her seems to fall into slow motion, sounds being drowned out by the beating of her heart in her ears, and emotions swirl inside her mind–a combination of sadness, joy, jealousy, and excitement. It's an odd feeling, really, being so overly happy for your friend but also heartbroken at the realization that you could've had that, too.

She can feel herself shutting down, so reminiscent of the night they learned their child didn't survive. It's as if the world around her is being muffled. Donna can see Mike and Rachel's eyes on her, and she hopes and prays not a long period of time has gone by with her sitting there, stunned; she doesn't think so, positive Harvey would have called her name or put his hand on her thigh to bring her back to the moment if it had been too long. So she blinks rapidly, pushing her tears back down and pulling herself back into reality.

Despite her efforts, Donna's eyes well with tears as she stands, stretching out her arms to embrace Rachel. "Congratulations!" she whispers into Rachel's ear as the younger woman stands, accepting the hug with tears of her own.

Rachel sniffles, admitting, "I was afraid to tell you. I know how hard the last few months have been for you guys–"

Shaking her head, Donna cuts her off, reminding her of a sentiment from long ago with a gentle, "Don't you ever be afraid to tell me good news, Rachel, okay?"

The women share a smile before looking to their husbands. Mike and Harvey are pulling out of a hug as well, Harvey's hand clapping onto Mike's shoulder, a proud look on his face. He really does love that kid, she thinks with a small grin.

"How far along are you?" Harvey inquires, the four of them meandering into the kitchen so the Paulsen-Specters can grab their leftovers to take home.

Rachel beams again, rubbing her flat stomach again. Donna's eyes watch the movement with a fond longing as her friend tells them, "Ten weeks."

Donna smiles, though she can feel that it doesn't quite reach her eyes. She asks Rachel when her next appointment is, and she tells her they'll go in about two weeks for the next check up.

"We'll have to go shopping!" Rachel exclaims, causing Donna to let out a breathy chuckle.

She puts on a brave face, despite the pounding of her heart in her chest, as she agrees. "And," Donna states, clearing the lump from her throat, "I might, uh, have some things you can use." Her voice croaks out the last work, whispering a If you want to the end of her sentence. She knows she has that yellow Bumbo seat they'd bought the day of their first doctor's appointment that they could use, as well as a few gender neutral onesies. "I also have some bath stuff we ordered online."

The air goes silent around the four of them, no one knowing quite what to say or do. There's a tension clouding the atmosphere, and she kicks herself, not wanting to ruin their special moment of telling their friends the good news. She can feel Harvey's hand land on the small of her back as he tells Mike and Rachel that they'll look in the spare room and see what they have.

They'd started setting up the nursery a few weeks before her miscarriage, around the ten week mark like Rachel is at now. Nothing big, no crib or anything was even purchased, but there were some smaller items stuffed into rubbermaids and placed under the bed they had in there currently. They were going to sell the bed when the time came to actually turn it into a nursery, but, she supposes, that won't be necessary anymore.

Mike nods, thanking Harvey as he pulls Donna into a hug. "Text us when you guys make it home," he says, placing a kiss to the side of her head.

Smiling small, she gives him a curt nod before moving to hug Rachel goodbye.

"Sure thing," Harvey assures, clapping Mike on the back and kissing Rachel's cheek. He turns around, reaching out to take her hand. She can feel the fog around her, almost like a panic attack, but she pushes it down, blinking forcefully and focusing on his outstretched hand.

Taking his in her own, Donna inhales slowly, deeply, as they all make their way to the front door.

She knows she should act more excited; she's an actress after all, this should be the performance of a lifetime, but the memories of being pregnant, then waking up to her blood on the sheets is consuming her. She wants to be present, wants to focus on the moment and celebrate with her friends, but her mind is screaming, shutting down.

She sweeps a strand of hair out of her hair before turning back to Rachel with a smile on her face, a more genuine one this time. "I really am so happy for you two," she reiterates, tears forming in her eyes again.

Mike loops his arm around Rachel, both of them thanking the couple, but she can't help but notice the sympathetic looks they're both giving her.

She wants to roll her eyes, she doesn't want their pregnancy to be clouded by her lack of one, so she forces another smile to her lips, looking to Harvey and asking if he's ready to go.

Her husband nods, smiling to his friends once more, giving Mike a single nod before opening the front door.

They make their way down the elevator and to the car, and she can slowly feel the tension covering her whole body now that she's out of their apartment. She climbs in, looking toward her lap. Harvey hasn't said anything, and she's glad for it, glad her husband knows her well enough to not bring it up in this moment. She doesn't want to talk right now, talking to Rachel and Mike had been hard enough, taken all her strength to plaster a smile to her face when she felt as if her insides were crumbling apart.

She's happy for them, she really, truly is, but it hurts… far more than she even expected after all these months and sessions with Stan. She doesn't really know how to handle this assortment of emotions, but she knows that tonight she just wants to cry once again for the little life they lost.

{**************************}

She'd been quiet in the elevator, hazel eyes fixated on the buttons, watching as the floors descended one at a time. It was the slowest ride down to the lobby he's ever taken.

His hand was holding hers the whole ride down, and he felt it shaking beneath his own. He wasn't sure if it was his or hers because he was just as affected by their friends' news as she clearly was. It's a confusing feeling being elated for your friends but sad for your own situation simultaneously.

When they got to the car, he opened the door for her, then made his way to the driver's side. He started the engine, letting it sit a moment while it heated up, the cool night air chilling their skin.

It's how they remain until he looks over and asks softly, "You okay?" as he reaches out to take her hand again.

Their interlocked fingers rest against the middle console as she mumbles a distracted, "Mmhm," giving him the fakest smile she's ever bestowed upon him. He doesn't push her, though. He knows how she's feeling right now, knows how hard the miscarriage had been on her, on both of them. She's made so much progress in their sessions with Dr. Lipschitz, but this news is bound to set both of them back a little. He just hopes she'll talk to him sooner rather than later so they can deal with this together.

The drive home is silent, the air thick with a saddened tension. He reaches out, turning on the radio. He keeps it turned down low, though, the mood in the car more suited for whispers than loud music. He glances over to Donna, trying to make eye contact, but her eyes are staring out the window. Harvey looks again when he gets to a red light, glimpsing at her reflection. Her eyes are blank, vacant as they stare into the darkness, her eyelashes fluttering as she attempts to hold back tears. He can tell her eyes are rimmed red with tears, and his heart aches for her. He just wants to make her feel better, to comfort her, and let her know that everything will be alright. All he can do is keep hold of her hand in his, giving her a reassuring squeeze. He's worried, doesn't want her to sink into herself again like she did back when it happened.

When they get home, she gets out of the car before he can say anything, walking into the building. They ride the elevator up, in silence still, and Harvey places his hand on the small of her back as he opens the front door.

As soon as the door closes behind him, it's as if the dam breaks. Donna makes it as far as the living room before she takes a heartbreaking, shuddered breath. She stumbles forward, her jacket falling from her hands and onto the floor before crumbling to the ground, sobbing, the echoes of her cries breaking his heart all over again. Her arms wrap around her stomach, and she begins rocking back and forth, crying out in pain.

Harvey instantly rushes to her, tossing the leftovers onto the kitchen island, then collecting her in his arms and shushing into her hair as he tries to soothe her. "I know, I know," he murmurs, pressing kiss after kiss to her hairline.

She sniffles and takes a long, drawn out breath, before whimpering, "Next week was–"

"–I know," he interrupts, not needing or wanting her to have to say it.

They go silent once more, sitting together on the living room floor. After a few moments, Donna's face crumples again, nodding sadly, "Next week was my due date…"

His eyes grow wet, swallowing back his own tears. He inhales sharply, a lone tear slipping free and down into her hair. He kisses her red tresses again, both of them cuddled together in the middle of the floor crying over their loss once more, and he wonders if they'll ever be able to mention it without breaking down like this. "I'm so sorry," he whispers, sniffling.

"No," she asserts, shaking her head. She brings a hand up, wiping the tears from her cheeks. She moves in between his legs, gripping onto him for support. "You have nothing to apologize for. I'm sorry."

His brows scrunch, shaking his head in reply. "Hey," he tucks his hand under her chin, bringing her face up to meet his eyes. "Look at me." Her eyes, which have been focused on his chin finally rise up, meeting his brown ones, truly, for the first time since they were at Mike and Rachel's. "I told you months ago, you have nothing to apologize for." She nods, a sad smile forming. He ducks his head, eyes tilting up to look at her like a teacher scolding a child, a smirk on his face when he amends, "and I thought I told you to never say that again."

His attempt to ease the tension clearly works because she smiles briefly before it falls again, and she sinks into his chest, her arms wrapping around him.

They stay there like that, both curled into the other, soaking up all the love and comfort they can draw from one another.

After a while, Donna lets out a defeated sigh, yawning as she lifts her head and admits, "I think I should text Stan, see if he can call us tomorrow morning."

Harvey nods, licking his lips as he agrees, saying he thinks they need that too.

Sniffling, she looks at him, silent tears still dropping from her eyes. His head tilts to the side sympathetically. Donna leans in, pressing the briefest of kisses to his lips. "Thank you," she whispers into the space between them.

He gives her a questioning look, not sure what he's done. "For loving me," she adds, smiling small at him.

He returns the smile, "Easiest thing I've ever had to do," he remarks, patting her knee as he wiggles out from under her. He stands, stretching his back, then reaches out for her. She stands as well, taking his hand as she leads him into the bedroom. They drift off to sleep that night, emotionally spent but both beyond thankful that they have each other.

{*************************}

Stan wasn't able to speak with them for a few days, which actually ended up being a blessing. She and Harvey were able to spend those days talking to one another, opening up and being honest about how they felt.

Two days after dinner with Mike and Rachel, Donna went to Rachel's office. She'd apologized again, tearfully revealing to Rachel that her own due date was coming up within the next couple of days. Rachel had cried and wrapped Donna in her arms, saying she didn't know and that she was sorry.

Donna shook her head. Of course Rachel didn't know, no one knew their exact due date except them. "It's not your fault," she'd told her best friend. Donna also reassured the brunette that she and Harvey were extremely happy for them. "It's just... a weird feeling, you know? I'm so overjoyed for you but I'm also still grieving," she admitted with a shrug. "But please don't think we aren't thrilled for you guys, because we really are."

It was a nice conversation, a freeing one, if she's honest. Rachel understood, beaming when Donna happily said she was thrilled to go shopping with her for baby stuff. And she was, she wanted to be there every step of the way for their best friends, no matter what.

Now, though, she and Harvey are on their couch at home. Dr. Lipschitz had been able to squeeze them in this Saturday morning before he went into work for the day.

"And how are you feeling about everything now that you've had a few days to process?" Stan asks, adjusting his glasses through the screen.

Donna takes a deep breath, glancing to Harvey, then back to the doctor. "Guilty, honestly…" she trails off.

Stan's head bobs to the side as he asks why she feels guilty.

She sighs, admitting, "because…" She shrugs, grimacing in shame, "I want another baby."

"Why does that make you feel guilty?" the doctor asks, trying to understand her mentality with the situation.

Harvey's arm loops around her waist, drawing her closer. He kisses her shoulder, bringing a small smile to her lips. "I feel... ugh," she huffs, looking up to the ceiling, trying to supress the tears forming, "I feel like another baby would… replace the one we lost."

Stan takes a moment; she always hates when he does this. It makes her internally question every answer she's just given, thinking what else she could have said instead. Donna flicks her eyes over to Harvey's whose gaze meets her, giving her a knowing look, then watches as Stan writes something down in his journal before looking back up to the couple. He asks Harvey if he feels the same way, and he nods, agreeing that he's been feeling guilty lately with the desire for another child. She knew that already, it was one of the things they'd discussed over the last few days when they finally admitted to one another that they still wanted a baby.

"Let me ask you this," Stan bends his elbows on the desk, fingertips resting against his chin. "Do you feel like you were a replacement for your sister, Donna?" Her head tilts to the side, not having a chance to answer before the doctor interjects with, "Harvey, do you feel as if Marcus is a replacement over you?"

They both stare at him, confused, as if coming to the same realization. "No," they affirm in unison.

"You aren't replacing the one you've lost," he says sincerely, arms folding over one another. "You are simply bringing another miracle into the world, no matter how you decide to do it. If you get pregnant or adopt, or–" Stan must see the look on their faces because he asks, "–Is adoption something you've considered?"

Donna bites on her bottom lip, eyes glancing down as she tries to hide a grin on her face. She and Harvey look to one another with a serene look on their faces, nodding together as they glance back to Stan. "We've talked about it," Harvey reveals, a little shrug accompanying his words.

"I think that's wonderful!" Stan beams, saying how he knows her doctor had told them after the miscarriage that getting pregnant might be more difficult.

They nod, Donna adding, "I know I'm getting older and the risks are higher, plus adoption has always been such a great thing in my mind..."

The older man smiles, a hand rubbing against his chin in thought.

"We aren't completely sure, though," she continues, twisting her lips and explaining to the doctor, "We've talked about trying again, but I also don't know if I want to risk what happened happening again." Donna sighs, telling Stan that there's a lot of options, and they're just trying to figure out what's best for them as a couple.

Harvey nods, "I think it could be a wonderful way for us to become parents, but like Donna said, we haven't made any final decisions yet," before kissing the side of her head again.

She smiles, more openly this time, as they both discuss the possibility of adoption versus getting pregnant and all the emotions that would come with either one with Stan.

No decisions are made just yet, both agreeing to put it on hold for a few more weeks while they learn to deal with their emotions over Rachel's pregnancy. She thinks, however, that learning to move on, learning to live with the pain of losing a child, won't just take a few weeks. It will take a lifetime, and that's okay. They can love other children as deeply as they loved their little cherry growing inside of her without forgetting him, their little Gordon James.

They hang up with Stan, both feeling more confident after the chat. They have another joint session scheduled for next week, and Donna takes a deep breath, standing from the couch.

It's the weekend, and neither of them have to go into the office today, having completed everything before leaving last night. "Come on," she chirps happily, tapping the end of Harvey's nose.

He looks up to her with a smile on his face. He adjusts his black glasses as she tells him she bought some french toast sticks the other day. "What do you say I make us some brunch?"

Harvey smirks, standing to join her in the kitchen. Before she can open the freezer, his arms wind around her waist, and he buries his nose into her neck, inhaling her aroma. "Easy there, I probably still smell like sex," she laughs, remembering the glorious way he'd woken her up this morning. "I need to shower soon."

"Mm," he growls playfully, "my favorite scent of yours."

She chortles, swatting at his roaming hands just before they reach the waistband of her yoga pants. "Don't be gross," she shakes her head, turning in his arms. Donna presses her lips to his, smiling into the embrace.

His tongue peeks out, tangling with her as she backs him up away from the refrigerator and against the marble island. His hands tangle in her hair, tilting her back far enough to trail his lips down her neck, briefly nipping at her collarbone, before making their way back to her lips. She smirks when he kisses her again, one, two, three little pecks as her arms wind around his shoulders.

Breaking apart, she breathlessly giggles and pushes her hair out of her face as she smiles sweetly up at him. "I'm glad we got to talk with Stan," she states, moving back toward the fridge to grab the bag containing their breakfast.

Harvey nods in response as she arranges the sticks onto the pan he'd taken out for her, spacing them out perfectly while the oven preheats.

With a grin, Harvey grabs the orange juice from the fridge, bringing it over and placing it onto the counter beside her. Smiling, she takes a glimpse at her husband, hair still a little mussed from their morning activities, and his pajama shirt just a bit wrinkled. "I love you," she tells him, playfully bouncing her hip against his.

Chuckling, he juts his hip back toward hers. "Well, that's good," he laughs, before spinning her around and into his embrace, "because I love you, too," he murmurs against her lips, kissing her once more.

Taking a step back, she smiles, breathing out contentedly as she places the pan of french toast sticks into the oven. And for the rest of the morning, they stay inside, cuddled together while movies play before finally getting up to grocery shop for the week and enjoy the weekend in domestic bliss.

{*************************}

Thoughts? Please review!

Chapter Text

Chapter six:

Donna smiles up at Sheila as the older woman places a mug of coffee down in front of her. "Thank you," she lifts the cup to her mouth and inhales the rich aroma. "Smells delicious," she hums, eyes practically rolling to the back of her head. "You have any vanilla I can add?"

Sheila smirks, tossing Donna the bottle she'd brought with her before taking her place on the couch across from the redhead. Louis and Harvey are discussing cases each firm has been handling lately, and Donna smiles as Harvey's arm comes to rest behind her. She scoots closer to his body, listening as the men complain about associates not being as capable as they were back in the day.

"Especially Mike," Harvey quips, earning an eye roll from Donna.

She smacks his chests, laughing when Louis agrees.

"How are him and Rachel doing, by the way?" Sheila asks, pulling a blanket tighter around her body. The chemo treatments have been going well for her, save for the more regular illness. She catches colds more readily now, one of which she is currently getting over. It may be almost September now, but she had caught a cold somehow, causing her to wrap up in a fuzzy blanket and sip tea to try and soothe her aching throat.

Donna looks over at Harvey, their eyes connecting, having a silent conversation. "They're really great," she informs the other couple with a soft smile.

Harvey squeezes her shoulder, adding, "They're both gearing up for the little guy to get here in a few months, so we've been helping them on the weekends."

Nodding, Donna jumps in, telling Louis and Sheila how they've spent the last five months setting up the nursery, she and Rachel having gone on more than their fair share of shopping trips to buy baby items, and especially trying to find the perfect crib. "Rachel couldn't decide which one she wanted—"

"—until she did," Harvey laughs, "and that was a whole other situation."

Snickering, Donna shakes her head, explaining to the pair that Harvey and Mike had spent an entire day putting the crib together once it arrived last weekend. It was a five-in-one convertible crib, which inevitably came with what Harvey deemed a million and one goddamn different parts, so it was quite the feat to put it together. "I needed this weekend get away just to recover!" Harvey jokes, rolling his eyes playfully.

She smiles, knowing this trip to New York was good for them in more than one way. It was nice to see their friends, not just the Litts, but also Alex, Samantha, and Katrina. They'd landed in Boston on Thursday night, stopping in to have dinner and stay the night with Marcus and the kids, which had brightened Harvey's mood immensely before coming up to New York Friday morning. They'd stopped by the firm to catch up with the name partners, Donna kissing Harvey on the cheek as she, Katrina and Samantha all left for an extended lunch together.

Harvey and the guys all ordered food to the firm, sitting around Alex's office with containers of take out and a bottle of scotch opened. It was nice, Alex and Louis enjoying the mid-day break to catch up with Harvey just as much as he appreciated it, too.

He's been working on a wrongful termination case, defending his client against breach of contract allegations from the company who fired him, and it's taken all Harvey has in him not to rip the company apart, so this extended weekend back to the East coast was definitely needed.

"And what about her baby shower?" Sheila asks, tapping Louis on the shoulder when Lucy starts to cry through the baby monitor. He nods and stands, going to get the little girl from her nap.

Nodding, Donna swallows her current sip of coffee before informing Sheila that they are planning to do one back home in Seattle with a group of people from work and the gym she and Rachel both go to. "Her mom also wants to host one here in the city," Donna states, "so we'll have to find another weekend to come out here before she gets too close to her due date."

Sheila nods, saying she'll be glad to help Laura however she can to set things up.

"That would be great," Donna agrees, "I'll let her know."

Picking up her cell, she pulls up Laura Zane's name, sending her a text to let her know that on top of planning things this weekend with her, Sheila could help once she and Harvey leave town.

Locking her phone, Donna smiles up at Louis and Lucy as they make their way back into the living room. Lucy grins upon seeing Donna and Harvey, reaching out for her uncle while gripping her fuzzy, pink blankie tightly with her other hand.

Louis chuckles, passing the little girl off to Harvey before sitting down and asking Sheila if she needs anything.

Donna watches, wondering how on Earth she would handle it if Harvey got sick like that. Louis has been by his wife's side the whole time and has really stepped up with taking care of things around the house and with Lucy throughout all these months of doctors appointments and chemo treatments. Donna makes sure Sheila and Louis are okay before her eyes scan back over to her husband. She watches, observes how well he is with the little girl. Lucy is one and a half now, still young enough to want sleepy cuddles from her favorite uncle, but old enough that she could play on her own while the adults caught up.

"And how's everything with you guys?" Donna asks, eyes pointing toward Sheila's balding head.

The blonde sighs, straightening her glasses. She shifts on the chair as she informs them that things are going as well as can be expected. "Obviously, I've lost most of my hair," she says with a small grin, waving her hand around her head. "But the silver lining is that I look pretty awesome bald."

"She's like my sexy little Sinéad O'Connor," Louis growls and clamps his teeth together like a wild animal taking a ferocious bite as he leans, nibbling at her ear.

Donna's eyes go comically wide, a smirk edging her lips upward as she looks to Harvey. He looks more horrified than her, and it takes all her strength not to burst out laughing. Wacking him on the leg, she shoots him a glare, silently telling him to fix his face. Harvey smirks, shaking his head as she grabs his phone, obviously trying to distract himself from the scene before them.

Sheila chuckles as she cups Louis' face, murmuring something about her handsome warrior, but before it can go on longer, Lucy pipes up, exclaiming, "Aunt Don! Up!" as she crawls into Donna's lap.

Helping her up, Donna wraps her arms around Lucy's tummy, kissing the side of her head. She inhales the sweet smell of her baby shampoo, longing for the day that their own apartment can be filled with this scent.

Breathing slowly, Donna blinks away the thought, looking back to the Litts. The thought doesn't break her heart like it once did, but there's still a sting when thoughts like that catch her off guard. "I know you've had a cold for a few weeks…"

Sheila nods, pushing Louis off of her payfully as she explains that the chemo treatments have weakened her immune system. "It's hard with Lucy being in daycare," she says, motioning toward the little girl who is content for now, twirling a piece of Donna's long, red hair around her chubby little finger. She's sucking her thumb, staring at the television just past Louis' shoulder as a cartoon plays on the screen. The volume is so low you can barely hear it, but she figures it must not be a bother for the toddler as she dazes out from the adults' conversation, focusing on the characters as they run around and fall down, little giggles coming from her when they do. "She comes home with so many germs, it's almost impossible not to catch something every few weeks."

"Is there anything they can do?" Harvey asks, leaning forward, his forearms on his knees.

Sheila and Louis both shake their heads, Louis explaining that it's just part of the territory with chemotherapy.

They talk for a few more minutes about the Lymphoma that is slowly taking over, Sheila trying to be as positive as she can be. She seems hopeful, so that's good, Donna surmises. They always say a positive outlook is one of the best ways to beat any type of cancer.

"It's just… odd," Sheila states, shrugging. "One minute you think everything is fine, you're taking care of your child and working, and the next, you're in a hospital bed hardly able to move."

Donna and Harvey both nod, him taking her hand and giving it an affectionate squeeze. She knows seeing Sheila in person has hit Harvey differently than it's been through FaceTime. She's gained weight, her hair has thinned, eyes sunken in… she almost looks like a different person.

He'd quietly admitted to her last night, after they'd climbed into bed, that seeing Sheila made him nervous. He'd never want something like that to happen to her, but of course promised her that he'd be by her side no matter what life threw at them.

Louis has been such a strong support for Sheila, and listening to him talk now makes her proud of her friend. Where once he would've become angry, terrorizing anyone and anything in his path to deal with his emotions, he's now calm, really stepped up to the plate to take care of his family. That's one good thing about having four other name partners at work–they were able to take more of the workload when needed to give Louis time to help Sheila more.

Lucy wiggles from Donna's arms then, meandering over to Harvey and climbing into his lap. He snorts, placing a kiss to her raven curls as she settles against his chest. "Hey, sweet girl," he coos, "are you bored with all this adult conversation?"

The other three laugh, Sheila standing to start cooking dinner for everyone.

Donna joins her, keeping an eye on Harvey as he situates himself on the floor with Lucy, picking up a doll from her pile of toys. "Like 'dis, Uncle Harbey!" Lucy squeals, giggling when Harvey tries to put a new outfit on her baby doll.

Lucy reaches out with a pudgy hand, helping Harvey fasten the back of the dress up. "Ah," he chuckles, wiggling the doll in front of Lucy, "now she's ready!"

The two laugh together, and Donna watches with a fond smile. He's so good with her, good with his niece and nephew, too, and honestly this whole trip has been nothing but an aphrodisiac for her. Seeing Harvey with kids, playing with them, or even just talking with Marcus' kids and giving them advice now that they're teenagers, she couldn't help but imagine how great of a father he will be one day.

The thought stalls her, no longer does her mind think of their chance of being parents in the past tense. She's hopeful for a future where they will have a child again, and the realization makes her smile grow even wider.

"He's great with her," Sheila mentions gently, rolling the homemade dough for the pizzas.

Donna looks to her friend, biting down on her bottom lip as she agrees. "Yeah," she breathes, pulling her hair to one side and glancing back to her husband. Louis has joined them now on the floor, galloping a toy horse over to a Barbie Lucy is pretending has fallen and gotten hurt.

She laughs softly to herself, elbowing Sheila while jutting her chin toward their husbands. "Who would've thought we'd see the day where those two were playing with Barbies together?"

The blonde chortles, bringing her hand up to muffle it. She leans her head to the side to cover a cough into her elbow before saying, "That is quite a sight.. but a cute one."

Giggling, Donna nods, rubbing Sheila's back to make sure she's alright, then grabs a yellow tomato to slice. They were making personal pizzas, thankfully, so Harvey couldn't give her a hard time about her beloved tomatoes on this one. Though, she muses to herself, she thinks he secretly loves when they have to do half and half because he gets to rib her about her favorite topping.

After a while, Sheila breaks the comfortable silence they'd found themselves in–Donna lost in her thoughts as she listened to her husband and Louis talk and play with Lucy. "Have you two considered trying again, since…" Sheila trails off, clearly not wanting to mention it.

Donna gives her a small smile, catching Harvey's gaze. Lucy had obviously quieted down long enough for Sheila's words to waft into the living room, and she bobs her head, silently letting him know that she's okay.

"We're actually considering… adoption," she informs her friend, catching Louis' attention as well.

His bushy eyebrows almost reach his hairline as he exclaims, "Really?!" then scurries across the room toward them.

Harvey stands from the floor then, placing a kiss to Lucy's chubby cheek before walking into the kitchen as well. "We haven't officially decided anything," he tells the couple, picking up a pepperoni to munch on, "but it's definitely something we've talked about for a while now."

Donna looks to Harvey with a gleam in her eye. "We've been talking to Stan about it for about six months. We don't want to rush into anything."

Louis nods, situating himself on a bar stool. "It'll be your rainbow baby," he says, looking between the pair far too excitedly. She can't fault him, though, Louis is a great friend and she knows he's excited for any new stage of life they take.

"A what?" Harvey questions, glancing around the kitchen at the other three, looking as if he's been left out of some insider information.

Donna and Sheila smile gingerly at one another while Louis chuckles in confusion. "A rainbow baby…" His brows scrunch, realizing Harvey really doesn't know what that means. "Oh my god," he sniggers, his hand coming to rest on his chin as his brows raise to his hairline. "How do I know this and you don't? Some things never change, I guess," he simpers, giving Harvey an arrogant look reminiscent of their rivalry days, "me being the smartest and all."

Harvey rolls his eyes at that, and Donna admonishes Louis with an, "Okay, okay, that's enough boys."

They all laugh, Louis clapping Harvey on the back. "I'm just messing with you, buddy!" He then explains to Harvey the meaning of the term, telling him that the baby a couple has, whether it's through adoption or naturally, after a miscarriage is called a rainbow baby.

Harvey nods intently, looking over to Donna. "As long as we don't actually name it Rainbow."

She laughs, swatting at his hand. "Of course not."

"What's holding you back from making a decision?" Sheila asks, spreading the sauce around on a pizza.

Taking a deep breath, Donna closes her eyes, then opens them again, looking toward her, then Louis. She explains the feelings they'd had, of thinking a new baby would be a replacement, and Louis listens with nothing but understanding in his eyes.

"There are just a lot of emotions we're working through," Donna explains, patting Harvey's hand across the counter. "Our doctor said there's still a chance to get pregnant naturally, so we are working through if we want to risk that all again or adopt or… something," she finishes with a sigh, chuckling softly as she pushes her hair behind her ear. She doesn't mind opening up to Louis and Sheila like this, Mike and Rachel also know everything they've been considering, but it's odd, talking about it so freely. She feels as if they've already made up their mind, they're just waiting on… something… a sign? She doesn't really know, just something to solidify in their hearts that adoption is the way to go. "It's a big decision, and we want to make sure we're totally on board one way or the other."

Sheila, ever the logical thinker, agrees, declaring that taking their time is best. She asks if they've made a pros and cons list, to which they shake their heads, saying they more or less have a list in their minds but nothing written down.

"Oh, you should definitely make one!" Louis announces happily, a giddy smile growing on his face. "It's a great tool Stan taught me!"

He hops from the stool, announcing that he'll put a notepad and pen in their room so they can make their list tonight.

Grinning, Donna looks to Harvey, both of them rolling their eyes at the man simultaneously, eliciting a giggle from Sheila.

"Aunt Don!" Lucy calls from across the room, breaking the moment. "Play!"

Smirking, Donna announces, "I guess I'm needed over there." She rinses her hands off, patting Harvey on the shoulder as she walks by, telling him, "You're on toppings duty now, Mister."

With a laugh, he stands, walking to the other side of the counter and dutifully picking up where she left off. While she plays with Lucy, Donna feels her husband's eyes on her, so she looks up, catching his gaze before his eyes drop down, continuing to chop the vegetables. She giggles to herself, leaning over to press a kiss to Lucy's hair while whispering, "Uncle Harvey is a silly goose," which causes the little girl to erupt with laughter, throwing herself into Donna's lap and shoving a toy horse into her face, begging her to play with it instead of her doll.

Taking one more glimpse of the kitchen, Donna beams, knowing there may actually come a day where playing with dolls and horsies while her husband cooks could be their reality, and the possibility excites her.

{***********************}

"It was so great seeing you guys," Louis claims with a sad expression the next morning, wrapping Donna and Harvey in a giant bear hug.

Harvey's eyes practically bug out of his skull, shifting over to Donna's over Louis' shoulder, smirking when he sees her eyes staring right back at his. "Okay, okay," she says, patting Louis' back, "Too tight, Louis."

Their friend chuckles wetly, wiping a stray tear from his eye. Harvey has to contain an eyeroll at the other man's emotional goodbye, but smiles nonetheless, always grateful that he is still in their life.

"And I'm going to miss you, my baby, so so much!" Donna squeals, stepping over to Lucy and scooping her up, twirling her around.

The little girl's peals of laughter echo throughout the living room, and Harvey grins while watching the interaction. He loves seeing Donna with Lucy, she's a natural mother–a fact he never knew before they were married but something he should have figured. His wife is a natural at everything she does.

"–looks good on her," Louis says, clapping Harvey on the back and pulling him from his reverie.

Not hearing the beginning of his statement, he gives his friend a questioning look, and Louis just snickers. His eyebrows scrunch together as he peers over to Harvey like he's lost his mind. "I said motherhood looks good on her."

Harvey's eyes go soft as he looks back toward Donna and Lucy, smiling to himself as his wife snuggles her nose into the crook of their goddaughter's neck. She pulls back, peppering kisses all over Lucy's rosy cheeks, murmuring over and over again how much she loves her.

He wants this for her. For him. For them. More than anything. Becoming a dad is certainly never something he saw for his own future, but being with Donna, finally feeling a peace about his life with her by his side, he knows they can conquer anything… including parenthood.

"Well," Donna sighs, joining the men in the kitchen, Lucy still attached to her hip. "Make sure you tell Sheila we said goodbye."

Louis beams, saying she was sad to have to go to work this morning, but promises he'll relay their message.

Harvey pats Louis' back, "Keep us updated on her treatments."

The other man nods, hugging each of his friends one more time before taking Lucy from Donna's arms.

"No!" the toddler screeches, flailing in her father's arms. Louis sets her down, and Lucy runs toward him and Donna, wrapping her arms around their legs. "No leave!"

He looks down at the little girl, his hand cupping the back of her unruly bedhead that's yet to be combed down this morning. His gaze travels over to Donna who gives him sad puppy dog eyes, making him chuckle. They have a flight to catch, and they need to leave soon so they have time to grab a vanilla coffee from their favorite coffee cart guy before heading to the airport.

Bending down, he hugs Lucy once more, promising her they'll come back to visit soon. "And hey," he reassures, tipping her chin up to look at him, "we will FaceTime you as soon as we get home."

"Pwomise?"

"Promise." He kisses her cheek and wraps his pinky around hers, each kissing the pad of their thumbs to seal the pinky promise in.

Standing up, he reaches out to grab their bags off the kitchen counter before taking Donna's hand in his and exiting the townhouse after one more goodbye to Louis.

Ray is waiting for them on the street, the biggest of smiles on his face. They hug the man, thanking him for taking time off from his new client to drive them today. He assures them it was no problem, "Anything for you, Donna," to which Harvey's eyes go wide, pretending to be offended.

"Come on, pretty boy," Donna smirks, wrapping her arm in his and giving it a little pat, "you know it was never you he really worked for."

He looks over to Ray, who simply shrugs as if to agree, and Harvey can't help but laugh. She's always been the one with the power between the two of them, she only lets him think it was him, and Harvey finds he's quite alright with that after all.

They climb into the towncar, Harvey having Ray drive them to get their coffee. Their time in the city may be over, and he hates for it to end, but part of him is ready to get home to their apartment and routine. The firm needs him, as much as he is loathe to admit it, this case is driving him crazy, but he also loves it, because Harvey knows that no one can stick it to the other guys quite like him.

With a grin that could rival any Cheshire cat, he picks up his phone, sending Mike an email to get an update on the case before locking it, sliding it into his jacket pocket, and taking Donna's hand.

She looks over, gracing him with a small smile, and he lifts their joined hands to his lips, placing a peck to her knuckles, then rests his head against the seat, listening to his dad's jazz waft through the speakers of the car.

{**********************}

Two months after their weekend trip to New York, Donna is awoken in the middle of the night with a phone call from Mike saying Rachel is in labor. She knows, logically, that it will be at least a few more hours before the baby is born, but she can't sleep, so she tosses and turns, trying her best not to wake Harvey.

She's just managed to doze off when her alarm blasts her into reality at five. She rolls over, grabbing her phone to turn it off. Donna sits up straight, jolting Harvey awake with a smack to his arm. "Wha–" he mumbles with a sleepy scowl, sitting up. Rubbing his eyes, he grunts, "What is it, babe?"

"Mike texted ten minutes ago to say things were progressing. We have to get there! I want to see that baby as soon as he's born!"

She hops out of bed, rushing to the bathroom to wash her face. Coming out less than five minutes later, she walks into their large closet, throwing on jeans and a thin sweater, pulling her hair into a messy bun as she comes out, rambling away to Harvey about how they need to pick up some food the couple can freeze so neither has to cook for a few days, they need to send out a firm wide email letting them know the bosses won't be in today, and–"Why are you still in bed, Harvey?!"

Her husband just chuckles, voice still thick with sleep as he rolls out, kissing her furrowed brow before going to the bathroom to brush his teeth. Donna grabs his jeans and a black shirt, tossing it into his arms the second he steps out of the bathroom. "Hurry!"

Shaking his head, Harvey simply smirks, changing quickly (thank God), moving to the kitchen to grab the car keys and drive them to the hospital. "Let me fix some–"

"–There's no time for coffee right now, Harvey."

"Babe–"

"–Harvey," she cuts in, giving him a stern look. "I will be in that hospital when my best friend gives birth."

Harvey sighs pitifully, but smiles, placing a kiss to her cheek as he takes her hand and they exit the apartment.

Once at the hospital, they spend the next three hours in the waiting room, Harvey grumbling something about how they should have stopped for breakfast and coffee. "Or slept longer," he yawns, his head falling back to rest against the pathetically cushioned seat.

Donna rolls her eyes, swatting at his knee. She stands up, pacing back and forth in front of where Harvey sits, his eyes half closed, half focused on her.

"It's taking too long," she mumbles, sipping on the awful cafeteria coffee they'd had to settle with. Mike had called her hours after Rachel actually went into the labor, only doing so when Rachel asked him if he'd called yet. She smirks, imagining her best friend, mid-labor, getting onto her husband for not contacting them.

"Her due date was, what, two days ago?" Harvey asks, breaking her thoughts. "There's nothing to worry about. Little man just wanted a few more days of peace and quiet." He grins tiredly, like he's the funniest comedian on the planet, but Donna just rolls her eyes, continuing to pace.

"I just feel like… I don't know," she huffs, crossing her arms. She's thankful she'd grabbed a sweater from their apartment, the hospital keeping it cool even though the November chill is cause for jackets and scarves outside. "I just think she should have had him by now. She went into labor yesterday."

"Birth takes a while, right?"

She rolls her eyes again, settling into her chair, deciding that pacing isn't doing anything to help, only riling her nerves up even more. "Yes, but…" she trails off, saying her Donna senses are tingling. "Something doesn't feel right."

Sighing, she runs a hand through her hair as she replays the time table in her mind. Rachel went into labor around seven last night, Mike didn't call until three this morning. "That's eight hours," she mumbles to herself. She can feel Harvey's eyes on her as she talks to herself, but she doesn't care, she keeps pondering… They didn't wake up until five, didn't make it here until a little after six. "That's eleven…" It's almost ten in the morning now, and they haven't heard from anyone. Donna's knee bounces up and down as she taps on her phone's screen to see if Mike has sent them a text yet about anything. Logically, she knows that fifteen hours of labor isn't that much time for a first time birth, some women are in labor for an entire day or more, so she really shouldn't be concerned, but, "I don't know, Harvey," she sighs as he reaches over, rubbing her back in comfort. His hand tangles in her hair, and she smiles at the contact. "Maybe I'm just overly cautious because of what happened with us, but I just have a feeling that something isn't right."

Harvey nods, sitting up to press a kiss to the top of her head before settling back into his chair. He takes a sip of his coffee, trying to assure her that it's all okay. Biting her lip, she clicks on Mike's name in her text messages. Everything okay? she types, assuming he won't answer if Rachel is busy pushing their child out, but she has to try anyway.

"He's not answering…"

Harvey sits up, taking her hand in his. "Donna, relax," he soothes, giving it a squeeze. "Everything's fine."

She nods and takes a deep breath, trying to calm her unexplained nerves.

Another two hours later, Mike comes out, a worried expression on his face. Donna stands up, hand lifting to her heart. She looks over her shoulder to Harvey, who now looks just as concerned, and if the situation was anything else, she'd feel smug that she was right and he was wrong.

Donna catches Harvey's eyes before turning back to the younger man. He's worrying his lip between his teeth, a furrow to his brow as he looks at them.

"Mike… what's wrong?"

{************************}

Harvey stands alongside Donna when he sees Mike come into the waiting room. He's seen that expression before, that look in the puppy's eyes that say he's distraught, scared.

Mike wipes at his cheeks, clearing the tears he can see there. Harvey looks to Donna, and she takes his hand, linking their fingers together. He watches as she blinks slowly, clearly trying to draw strength from his touch, just as he does with hers.

"There were some complications…" Mike murmurs, almost like he's talking to himself. He begins to ramble, telling them that Rachel's uterus didn't contract enough to deliver her placenta, causing her to bleed out more than normal. "They rushed in and, and, and," Mike stumbles, reaching out to steady himself. Donna steps forward, taking his arm in her hand. "They had to stop the bleeding, there was so much blood, Donna, and Rachel, she, she," he exhales, tears forming in his eyes again. Mike closes his eyes, inhaling slowly before blowing it out again.

"It's okay, buddy," Harvey comforts, pulling Mike into a hug. He hates seeing him like this, can't imagine how he must be feeling. He doesn't know what he would do if something ever happened to Donna and he was unable to help. Harvey squeezes Mike in tighter, letting him cry. "It's okay… Is Rachel alright?"

Mike nods against his shoulder, huffing as he pulls back. He tells them that the doctor disclosed to him that if she'd lost any more blood, she could have died. "I could have lost her," he winces, bringing a hand up to his forehead, rubbing at his temples.

Donna looks to Harvey, a hand to her chest like she's trying to calm her rapid heartbeat, wanting to be strong for Mike. And he can relate, wants nothing more than to be strong for his friends right now.

"But everything is okay now, yeah?" Donna asks, stepping closer and placing one hand to Mike's shoulder, the other to Harvey's forearm. "The baby is okay, too?"

"Yeah, yeah," Mike nods. He takes a deep, calming breath, then exhales with a beaming smile. "She's resting and the baby is with the nurses getting cleaned and everything."

Donna breathes a sigh of relief, closing her eyes, whispering a Thank God before looking over to Harvey. He smiles, relieved that despite the concerns, everyone is doing fine now.

"He's beautiful," Mike claims proudly. "Seven pounds, six ounces. From what I can tell he's got dark eyes like Rachel."

The couple smile brightly at him, nodding and congratulating him once again.

"Why don't we go get a snack downstairs? Give Rachel a few more minutes to rest before we come in," he suggests, taking her hand.

Nodding, she smiles over at Mike, promising they'll be there in a little bit.

They make their way from the waiting room in silence. Once in the elevator, Harvey presses the down button, and when it starts moving, Donna sighs deeply, her shoulders sagging as she leans into his embrace. He can feel a lone tear wet his shirt, and he reaches up, running a hand up and down her back as he lets her cry out her fear. "It's okay," he soothes, kissing her head. "Mike said she's fine."

Nodding against his chest, she agrees, "I know, I know." She lets out a wet scoff of a laugh, looking up at him now. "I was just so worried and didn't want to cry in front of Mike," she explains, wiping a tear from her cheek. "So now it's just all coming out."

She laughs at herself, rolling her eyes and shrugging. Harvey chuckles, draping his arm across her shoulders as he pulls her into his arms again. He promises her that he understands, and as the doors open, she clears her cheeks, taking his hand and walking with him to get the food.

{**********************}

Making their way back upstairs, Donna tucks a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "You ready?" she asks, glancing at Harvey.

They check in with the nurses, following their directions to get to Rachel's room.

Walking in, Donna's face, which has been set in a worried frown ever since Mike told them of the complications, splits into a wide smile. "Rach," she breathes, walking over to the bed.

Rachel grins groggily up at her, reaching out to take her hand. Donna gives it a squeeze, sitting on the edge of the bed, taking up as little room as possible. "I can move over," Rachel says, coughing to clear her throat as she shifts further over on the mattress.

"No, no," Donna admonishes with a shake of her head, "don't move. I'm fine right here."

Rachel smiles, assuring her that she's fine. "I'm just sore," she chuckles, "Pushing out a baby and having minor surgery in the same afternoon isn't easy."

"Well, we're just glad you're okay," Harvey interjects, smiling over at the two women from his spot in the chair across the room. Mike sits on the bench in front of the window, agreeing with Harvey with a heartfelt bob of his head.

Rachel glances happily to Harvey, then to Donna, asking if she's seen the baby yet.

"Not yet!" Donna replies, grinning at her friend. "He's been with the nurses."

Just then, a knock sounds at the door and a raven haired nurse walks in, rolling the baby in his plastic bed. "There he is," Rachel croons, stretching her neck to get another glimpse at her son. "Donna, Harvey," she announces, "I'd like you to meet Robert James Ross."

Everyone smiles brightly at one another, Harvey clapping Mike's shoulder and pulling him into a congratulatory hug.

"Named after your dads," Donna states, smiling at the thought. She and Harvey had planned to do the same thing with their son, and she chuckles, thinking how both of their boys would've had the same middle name. "I love it," she whispers, kissing Rachel on the cheek.

Donna stands, peering into the bed and down at the baby. "Can I pick him up?"

"Of course!" Rachel exclaims. "Robbie needs all the Auntie Donna snuggles he can get."

Giggling, Donna reaches in, picking the baby up from his crib. Glancing down at him, she rubs the tip of her finger over his tiny button nose and down to his plump little lips. He has on a blue hat from the hospital, but Mike tells her that Robbie already has tufts of blonde hair on his head.

"He's beautiful," she breathes, eyes welling up with tears. She's not sad over what they'd lost over a year ago, not in this moment anyway, just simply overwhelmed with love for this baby boy and her friends. "I can't believe he's here."

Leaning in, Donna presses and soft kiss to his pink cheek, then looks over at Harvey, asking him is he wants to hold the baby. He's staring at her with so much love in his eyes that Donna thinks she could buckle at the knees, but she holds herself upright, motioning him toward her with her head.

He nods, stepping over and letting Donna place the newborn in his arms. She watches as Harvey grins down at the baby, the lines around his eyes crinkling as Robbie's tiny hand pops out from the blanket and wraps around Harvey's finger. It's a sight she never thought she'd see, Harvey Specter smiling down at a newborn, but this… this is everything. It's the same feeling that overwhelmed her in New York two months ago when she watched him with Lucy. He's so good with kids, his softer side really comes out around them, and she has to bite her lip and remind herself that they're in a hospital as she looks away with a coy grin edging the corners of her mouth up.

"Happy birthday, little buddy," Harvey murmurs, kissing his tiny, wrinkled knuckles.

Donna beams, looking toward Mike, then Rachel, catching her best friend's eyes and receiving a knowing look from the brunette.

They spend the next two hours with the Ross family, passing the baby around before letting Rachel feed him and lay him down to sleep.

Harvey's perched on the arm of the chair that Donna sits in, and he leans over, whispering, "We should probably head out soon."

Checking the time on her phone, seeing that it's already four in the afternoon, she agrees. She doesn't want to leave but knows they need to let the new parents rest while they can. "I'll call you later, okay?" she asks Rachel, standing to press a kiss to her forehead.

Rachel smiles, "That sounds good. Thank you guys for being here today."

She assures her it was no problem and that they wouldn't have been anywhere else. They hug Mike and both rub Robbie's full belly before making their way home, exhausted but happy, and glad that everything worked out for their friends.

{***********************}

Walking into their apartment, they both sigh, flopping onto the couch before they can do anything else.

He looks over at Donna, and they laugh tiredly in synchronicity, agreeing that today was taxing. "I'm exhausted, and I'm not even the one who had the baby!" Donna jokes, reaching down to remove her shoes.

Harvey smirks, leaning back against the cushions of the couch, one hand settling onto his stomach. "Come here," he summons, an arm outstretched for her to fall into.

Smiling, Donna curls into his side, stretching her legs out to cross over one another on the coffee table. Harvey mirrors her pose, lifting his legs onto the table as well while pulling her shoulders closer to him.

Her hand rests on his chest, and her fingers thrum against his heart. Harvey brings his hand up, resting it against her tapping fingers. He takes that hand in his, bringing it to his lips, pressing a kiss to each knuckle.

"Things got… scary… earlier," he states, peering down at his wife.

She nods against his chest, saying it was one of the scariest moments of her life. "When he came out talking about all her blood and how she could have died…"

They go silent, each seemingly lost in their own thoughts about the situation.

"Donna," he breathes, shifting on the couch so he's able to look at her more directly. She sits up, giving him a questioning look. "I… I know we've been debating between adoption or trying to get pregnant," he relays, taking a deep breath. He takes both of her hands in his, linking their fingers and hoping she doesn't take what he's about to say the wrong way. "But I don't want to go through that, what they did. I may be a gambler," he bobs his head down and looks at her from under his lashes, smirking before growing serious again, "but I don't want to chance you dying before our life together can really even begin…"

He knows they've had a life time together already, but not like this, not together, not by each other's side in every sense of the word. Harvey looks at her shyly, pressing his lips together nervously.

Donna licks her lips, inhaling a long, drawn out breath, which only adds to his apprehension. "Harvey, I…" she starts, chuckling when she looks into his worried, brown eyes. "I feel the same way." Harvey's eyes light up, asking her if she's sure. Donna smiles gingerly, confirming that she's positive. "The thought of something going wrong, especially when I'm so much older than Rachel, and I've already had a miscarriage… there's just too many risks in getting pregnant."

She shifts on the couch, bringing her legs onto the cushion to sit criss-cross facing him. She takes his hands again, bringing them into her lap. "So," she shrugs, grinning.

"So," the side of his mouth lifts to match hers, "we agree then?"

Donna bites down on her bottom lip, shrugging her shoulders again timidly.

"I want that, you know?"' Harvey confesses, and her head tilts to the side, questioning him silently. He chuckles, shaking his head. "Today, with Robbie. He's already brought so much happiness to Mike and Rachel. I've never seen Mike look like that." His eyes fill with tears as he imagines his and Donna's life being filled with diapers and pacifiers, tears and sleepless nights… it's what he wants for them. It'd be an adventure he'd never considered in the past, but ever since she first found out she was pregnant, then that sonogram where he heard their baby's heartbeat, he's known that becoming a dad was what he was meant to do.

Donna nods as her hazel eyes brim with tears, one slipping down past her lashes and onto her cheek as she admits she wants that too. "So," she giggles wetly, "We're going to adopt?"

A few stray tears fall down his cheek, and they both laugh and nod with knowing looks in their eyes. "We're adopting." He proclaims it so doubtlessly, so sure of himself, of their decision they've made, that it surprises even himself, but solidifies their decision even more for him.

"'I'll call the adoption agency first thing in the morning."

His smile falters, brows cinching together. "You… already know what agency we're going to use?"

Donna's head bobs down, her chin almost touching her chest, as she flattens him with a deadpan look. "Harvey," she scoffs, "I'm Donna. Of course I do." She smirks slyly, causing him to snort.

He shakes his head with a knowing grin. "I'd expect nothing less," he jests, tugging her back into his chest. Donna's legs stretch back out onto the coffee table in front of them, and they spend the next few minutes dreaming together of what country they want to adopt from, if they want a boy or girl, or if it doesn't matter, and eventually Donna ends up pulling out her laptop, pulling up research for them to look over for the rest of the night on things to consider when adopting.

That night, as she finishes writing down questions they need to ask the agency, she smiles over at him. Their eyes meet, and his chest warms with the amount of love he feels for his wife. They smile tearfully, blissfully, and he wonders for a fleeting moment if they'll ever not get this emotional over their decision to adopt. It's an exciting moment, the biggest choice they've ever made together, and the one he knows will bring them a type of happiness they've never experienced before. "We have to tell Stan we finally decided," she says with a grin, and he smiles right back.

"I think he'll just be happy we made up our minds," he chuckles, pressing a kiss to her lips.

Donna peppers kisses to his lips, then his jawline, before sighing contentedly into his neck. "I'm so happy," she admits with an airy giggle, the brightest smile he's seen on her face in over a year.

He heart beat grows as he agrees, "Me too, Donna, me too," and kisses her once again.

And she's right. There's more happiness in his heart than he's felt in a very long time. The future for the Paulsen-Specters is looking bright, and he can't wait to start talking to the adoption agency and get the ball rolling on expanding their family by one tiny little member.

{****************************}

Yay! They've finally decided to adopt! Please review :)

Chapter Text

Chapter Seven:

Inhale.

Exhale.

Remember to breathe.

Donna chants the mantra in her mind the whole ride to the local province's government building. The half-paved roads are bumpy, and she grips Harvey's hand each time the van bounces. He squeezes back, of course, always anchoring her. She may have been his compass all these years, but he was her support system through all of this.

He's been her rock over the last year, ever since they contacted the adoption agency the day after they tearfully agreed adoption was the choice for them.

"May I speak with Donna Paulsen-Specter?" Donna hears on the other end of the line.

She sits up, nerves skittering across her body, goosebumps raising against her skin. "This is she."

Donna listens as Mingzhu Li (Ming for short, she informs her) introduces herself, telling Donna that she's the social worker with New Beginnings Adoption Agency that she's been emailing.

Ming explains that they've received their application, and she would love to meet with her and Harvey.

Before Donna can respond, Harvey walks in, tossing his keys onto the kitchen counter. She waves him over frantically, a giant smile on her face, as she puts the phone on speaker. "Sorry, my husband just walked in, actually," she explains, mouthing to Harvey that it's the adoption agency while pointing dramatically down to the phone. "I wanted him to hear it all from you as well."

Ming chuckles brightly, assuring Donna that it's fine. She goes on, walking them through the process — meeting with her for a face to face visit to gather information on them as a couple, paperwork, a home visit, prepare an adoption dossier, even more paperwork, making sure their passports are up to date, shots are received, and, surprise, surprise, more paperwork…

They agree on a day and time to meet next week, and Donna's stomach drops with anticipation.

She hangs up, biting her lip as she tries (but fails) to contain a squeal of delight as she jumps up, pulling Harvey up with her.

He wraps his arms around her middle, hugging her tightly, before pulling back and taking her hands in his. He swings them between their bodies in an uncharacteristically chipper mood and exclaims, "That was fast."

"I know!" she practically shouts, twirling herself around while holding his hand. He chuckles, pressing a kiss to her lips as she says, "I've only been emailing her for a few weeks. I thought for sure it would take months for them to get in contact with us."

That night they waste time away looking through the agency's website, discussing the children they see and how their hearts hurt for all of these kids who were abandoned. "I'm glad we're going to give one of them a home," Harvey admits, closing the laptop and placing it on his bedside table.

Donna wiggles down into the covers, nodding and agreeing. They know more than likely none of the children pictured on the site as of right now will be theirs, but it gives them something to do, something to dream about, and as Donna kisses her husband goodnight, she drifts off, dreaming of a day when they have their child home with them for good.

Inhale… exhale…

Her eyes close as she breathes out, then open slowly as the van comes to a final stop. She hears Ming tell the families that they have arrived, and there's a collective sigh that reverberates throughout the vehicle. She's disappointed that they won't get to see the orphanage where their baby has lived for the first four months of her life, but some families were receiving children from other provinces, so the custom was to all meet at the local government building and social workers from the different orphanages would bring the babies to them.

Donna looks to Harvey, eyes shining with fresh, excited tears. His brown orbs match her own, and she spies the tremble in his lip that he tries to hide by leaning in and pressing a kiss to the top of her forehead.

This is it. This is the moment they've been waiting for. It's been fourteen months since they decided to adopt, almost nine months since they found out about a woman who was pregnant and wanting to give her baby to a loving family. Their daughter was born four months ago, and now that all of the documents have been signed and processed, they can finally meet her. It was faster than some other couples have to wait on their child, but she definitely wasn't going to complain about that.

The past year, really two years, have been the hardest — moving across the country, her miscarriage and everything that came along with that, the whole adoption process — but the most emotionally rewarding years of Donna's life. She's overwhelmed as they step out of the van, the bright, Guangdong sun glaring down on her porcelain skin.

They make their way inside the building, sounds of people milling about, phone ringings, and coos and cries of babies echo down the halls.

Harvey squeezes her hand, checking that she's okay. She looks to him, nods, then faces the woman in charge once again.

She goes through the technicalities, the important information that Donna prays Harvey is listening to because her mind is too focused on the room behind the woman where she can see workers holding smaller babies and older ones on the floor with their blocks and toys.

She brings herself to the present, though, knowing Harvey is more than likely only getting half of what she's saying. It's why she always listened in on his meetings, more than just to be nosy, she was always prepared to give him the smaller details that his mind missed while it worked on overdrive to get the important facts of the case down.

After what feels like an eternity, the families all move to another room, all lining up on a wall. A door to their left opens, and Donna immediately begins to cry when she sees the children brought in. She instantly recognizes their daughter, clothed in a sweet white onesie with little pink and yellow flowers all over it.

There's a tuft of black hair peeking out from under her little yellow hat, and an emotional cry comes from Donna's throat as the social worker comes closer. She can hear sniffling beside her, and if she wasn't so enthralled in catching glimpses of their daughter, she'd look to make sure Harvey was okay, too.

"This is your baby," she hears the old Chinese woman say, holding out their baby to her and Harvey. "Caihong."

Donna meets her halfway, reaching out to receive their child, tears falling softly against her pale, freckled skin. Harvey reaches around, grabbing her waist and pulling her closer as he leans in, a breathy Hi, there, baby whispered out between them all. A sob escapes as she looks down at the tiny girl, cuddling her close and kissing the top of her head.

She squirms in Donna's arms, one small fist lifting in the air, her five little fingers splaying out as she stretches and grunts.

Smiling, she looks over to Harvey. His hand taps at her waist as he leans in again, peering down at the baby. "She's beautiful," he whispers tearfully, reaching up to wipe one away.

Donna's heart thumps against her chest so forcefully at the sight of his tears, she's surprised no one else can hear it. He's not one to openly be emotional, it's rare that she's even seen his tears. But this is different, she rationalizes, this is their child.

Their child.

They are parents. Finally. After all this time and heartache.

Watching Harvey coo and talk softly with their baby, she can't help but remember all the precious moments leading to this.

"We have something to tell you guys," Donna says, a giddy smile forming on her lips as she reaches for Harvey's hand beside her.

Rachel and Mike look at them in curious anticipation, Rachel's eyes furrowing as she bounces Bobby in her arms across the table. "What is it?"

Donna takes a deep breath, eyeing the waitress as she comes to refill their glasses. As she walks away, Harvey's hand pulses in hers and he grins. "We're adopting."

Mike's mouth falls open, a smile splitting his face practically in half as he reaches out to clap Harvey's shoulder. "Congratulations, man!"

"Oh my god!" Rachel squeals, clamping a hand over her mouth as she looks down at the milk-drunk baby that is half asleep in her arms, then out at the other patrons of the diner. "This is so exciting!"

Donna's eyes swell with tears as she takes note of the excitement of their best friends. Rachel's smile falls as she reaches her free hand over to Donna's, asking what's the matter.

Shaking her head, Donna clears the lump of emotion away. "Nothing," she breathily chuckles, "just seeing you guys so happy made me really happy."

Rachel's eyes glisten at that, reassuring Donna that they're beyond thrilled for them. She looks to Harvey, giving him a pleased smile before adding, "Bubs here can have a friend to play with!"

The group all chuckle, and Harvey scoots closer to Donna, his arm wrapping around her hips as he gives her a wink.

They spend the next hour telling Mike and Rachel all about the adoption agency, their social worker and how she's already sending them alerts of babies. "It could take anywhere from just a few months to years for us to be chosen, but it's at least a start," Harvey interjects.

They'd contacted the agency the day after deciding to adopt last month, and each time Donna received an email from Ming, her heart stopped beating for a split second, wondering if that email would be the one letting them know they'd been selected as parents.

She smiles nervously, that gnawing feeling in her stomach each time she thinks about that coming day. She knows they'll be excited, of course, but the anticipation of 'is today the day?' overwhelming her each morning is driving her insane.

Mike makes a toast, the four of them celebrating this new start to Harvey and Donna's life. As she looks over at her husband, she can't help the beaming smile she sends his way. She's so completely in love with him, has been for more years than she'd ever admitted to herself in the past, and now their future was beginning.

"I can't believe she's ours," Donna says, the other families in the room also crying over their new children, but Donna doesn't see them, can't hear them anymore, her world now completely changed and flipped upside down by this gorgeous, brown eyed girl. "Hi, our sweet little, Rose."

She beams up to Harvey, their eyes connecting as they realize the name they'd chosen months ago is so beyond perfect now that they have her in their arms. "Do you want to hold her?" she asks, hoisting Rose up just a fraction toward Harvey.

He gladly, and eagerly (adorably), jumps at the chance, and her heart thumps, wishing they could have split the baby in half so he could have held her first as well. He reaches out and Donna places Rose in his arms. He's nervous, she can tell, because his hands are shaking slightly, and she can hear his ragged breathing. Once the baby is nestled in his arms, however, a calm comes over his whole body. Harvey visibly relaxes, and it's as if their little Rose had always been in his embrace. "Wow," he breathes, looking up to Donna with tears in his eyes. He shakes his head as a giant smile splits his face, and all she can do is smile right back at him and their daughter. Together, finally.

Watching them together, her eyes going soft as Harvey runs a loving finger along her chubby cheek, bopping her tiny button nose and smiling down at Rose, she thinks back to when they discovered their birth mom was having a girl, and she smiles gently at the memory.

"Donna!" Harvey yells as Donna passes by his door.

She makes her way into his office in a hurry, a worried expression upon her face. She closes the office door, turning to face him. "Harvey? What's wrong?"

He shakes his head, pointing to his laptop wildly as he motions her over to his desk. "Nothing, nothing," he says with a quiet laugh, "I got an email from Ming."

Her hazel eyes widen, knowing they were finding out the sex of the baby this week, and Ming had told them that the next time she contacted them, she'd have the news.

Donna comes around his desk, peering down at the screen. He pats the armrest of his chair, signaling for her to sit. She smiles, perching herself cautiously on it. Taking a deep breath, they look at one another, an unspoken sentiment coursing through them. They know they'll be happy with either gender, they just want it to be happy and healthy. "Open it," she says with a grin.

Clicking on the screen, Harvey breathes out, mumbling the words of the email message out loud until his eyes light up and he sits up straighter. "... pleased to let you know that your baby is a girl!"

"A girl!" she shrieks, her nose scrunching in joy. She turns his laptop more her way so that she can read it for herself, and she instantly starts to cry as she reads "it's a girl" over and over again.

She looks down at Harvey, his eyes clouded with tears as well, and she pulls him to her, pressing her lips to his.

"A girl!" he shouts, catching the attention of two associates milling around in the hallway.

Donna laughs, slapping his arm as she shushes him. She leans in again, pecking his lips twice more before saying she has to go finish preparing for their meeting with Mike and Rachel in a few hours. He kisses her back, saying he'll see her at lunch. "Love you," she mumbles into his lips. "We're having a girl." She whispers the reminder into the space between them like a reverent prayer, and Harvey beams brightly, nodding happily and telling her he loves her, too before she makes her way out of his office.

That night at home, they discuss names while cuddled on the couch, Survivor playing in the background. Harvey has a baby name website pulled up, scouring through the enormous list of options.

"I know we said when you were pregnant that we'd name a girl after my mom," he starts tentatively, and she knows that her previous pregnancy is still a hard thing for them to talk about despite how much easier it's gotten over the last year and a half, "but we don't have to. There's a lot of options out there." He points to the screen with wide eyes, sighing as he murmurs that it'll take the next five months before she's born anyway to pick the perfect name for their girl.

Donna smirks, reaching out to take the laptop from him. She bites her lip, knowing her idea she's been secretly mulling over the last few weeks might seem kind of silly. "Remember when Louis told you about a rainbow baby?"

Harvey nods, smiling at her as he recounts their trip to New York and how Louis explained the meaning behind the term to him.

"Well," she shrugs, "I was kind of thinking a color word might be a cool name."

Harvey's eyebrows scrunch together, head tilting in confusion. "We're not naming our daughter Pink."

Snorting, she shakes her head. "Not like that," she laughs. "There are other names that can be colors."

"Like what?"

"Like… Scarlett," she justifies, "or Sapphire, Emerald, Diamond!"

They laugh at the options, Harvey putting his foot down that their baby will not be named Sapphire. "What about Rose?" he suggests after a moment.

She looks over at him curiously, "Rose?"

He shrugs, that boyish grin she loves so much playing at the corner of his lips. "Yeah. Your hair is red, roses are red…" She rolls her eyes and swats at his chest, before typing into Google 'Names that are also colors' to see what it produces. "Plus," he adds, taking her hand and bringing her attention back to him, "it was my grandmother's name."

That gets her attention, and she closes the laptop, Google search forgotten. "Your grandmother? Like the one whose wedding ring you gave me?" she inquires, holding up her sapphire ring that she's still so in love with.

"Yeah," he chuckles. "You see? It's perfect."

Once Rose is settled on, they discuss if they want to go back to Lily, making her Lily Rose, but in the end, they decide the idea of using his mom's name should stay with their first pregnancy.

"What about your grandmother?" he asks as they make their way to the kitchen to cook dinner. "We obviously can't go with Clara Rose or Roberta Rose," he jests, causing her to laugh.

"No," she snickers, "definitely not." She thinks for a moment, reminiscing over her memories of her father's mom and how she used to spend summers at her lake house. "My grandma on my dad's side was Grandma Evelyn," she says with a shrug, "which I kind of love."

"Evelyn Rose," he states. "Evelyn Rose Specter." His lips turn down in a contemplative look, before smiling. "I like it."

Turning from where she was grabbing an onion from the refrigerator, she beams. "I like it too." She pecks his lips before pulling out the chopping board. "And Grandma Evie was awesome," she declares, "so our kid is bound to be just as cool. Awesome namesake, awesome mom," she gestures to herself with a smug smirk, "what more could she ask for?"

Harvey laughs, agreeing that she is pretty awesome as he pulls out another ingredient.

As they cook, she recounts memories of her favorite grandma to Harvey, laughing so hard her sides hurt as she tells him about the time she and Grandma Evie pushed Donna's sister into the lake while she was trying to impress the boy that lives next door. "She was so mad!"

Harvey chortles, shaking his head and reliving some childhood memories of him and Marcus as well.

As they place the dish into the oven, Harvey takes her hand, spinning her into him. He presses one, two, three sweet kisses to her lips that she smiles into.

"We'll be bringing Evelyn Rose home before we know it!" she announces with a wide smile, and all Harvey can do is smile right back at her.

Before they leave the government building, Ming comes up to them, telling them that Chaihong's birth mother is here and wants to meet them.

Donna looks to Harvey, unsure if they want to take that step, but when her eyes meet his, then look at their little girl, their unspoken conversation lets her know that they should.

Nodding in Ming's direction, the older woman beams at them, motioning for the couple to come with her. She leads them to a smaller office where a young, so so young, girl stands nervously. She's wringing her hands together as she looks from Donna and Harvey to Ming, murmuring something in Chinese as she cries.

Ming translates for her, telling the Specters that this is Lan, Caihong's mother. Donna smiles, telling them that her English name is Rose. Lan smiles brightly, bowing her head in appreciation and gratitude toward the couple.

The young girl wipes at the tears under her eyes, telling Donna and Harvey that she was young, only eighteen, and she couldn't have a baby—didn't want one either. She'd slept with a white man, and when she found out she was pregnant, her family disowned her.

Donna's eyes fill with tears as she reaches out for Harvey's hand, looking down at their little girl. Lan smiles tearfully, thanking them for taking her baby. "She will be love," she says in her best English accent.

Beaming, Donna nods and assures her that she will. "Thank you for giving her to us."

Ming translates, and Lan nods happily. It's bittersweet for the young girl, Donna assumes, but she seems to be at peace with her decision, and Donna's heart swells, thankful they were given the chance to meet the girl who gave birth to this little miracle that she's already madly in love with.

Lan bows, leaving the room after signing one more paper for Ming, telling Donna that she would keep them in her prayers, and she wished them good luck.

Once gone, Harvey turns to Donna, bouncing Rose in his arms and making her giggle. They both smile widely at that, Donna deciding her little giggles are the most joyous sound she's ever heard.

"You ready, Mama?" Harvey asks, winking in her direction.

Giggling, she agrees, pressing a quick kiss to Rose's cheek and then to Harvey's. "Let's go."

They bid Ming goodbye, thanking her for all of her help, and promising to keep in touch. They'll be in China for another week before they can leave to go home, so they all agree to meet up one day for lunch.

She knows they'll see her over the next few days, but with the other families as well. They all have to stay in Guangdong for the next few days to receive their children's birth certificates, Chinese adoption decrees, abandonment certificate, and passports. After that, they'll fly to Guangzho to have their children's pictures taken for their visas. They'll stay there for a few days while the visas are processed before being allowed to go home.

Last week, when they landed in Beijing, they spent a few days in the big city, allowing their bodies to adjust to the time change before flying to Guangdong. While in Beijing, though, they'd decided that after getting Rose, bouncing from province to province, paperwork after paperwork, they wanted a few days to relax and sightsee as a family before flying home. They'd gone ahead and paid for their suite in Beijing, and with that in mind, they'd told Ming of their plans, and as luck would have it, she would be in the capital at the same time.

With plans set, Donna pats Harvey on the arm, exiting the building as a new family.

{****************************}

Harvey leans in, peppering kisses to Rose's nose and cheeks. "Mommy and Daddy love you so much," he murmurs gently, looking over to Donna as she enters the bedroom.

He'd planned ahead, knowing they'd have to stay in Guangdong for several days before traveling again, so he splurged and got them a suite in a nice hotel. There weren't many in the province since it wasn't a highly sought after town, but he managed to get the best possible as only Harvey Specter could. Only the best for his family (that's how he justified it to Donna when she reasoned they didn't need a two bedroom hotel suite with a kitchen and living room for four days).

"You're already such a sap." She smirks, walking over to their luggage.

Harvey shrugs with a playful eye roll, looking back to where Rose is laying on the mattress of their large bed. She's smiling up at him, and Harvey doesn't think he's ever been this in love with someone before.

Sure, he loves Donna, more than life itself… but this… this is different. This is a type of love he's never known before, and it's only been one day. He can't imagine how he'll feel after spending a lifetime with his little girl.

He tickles her rounded belly, making her squirm and gurgle in delight.

"Is this Louis' dictaphone?" he hears Donna ask in half amusement, half confusion.

Busted.

Harvey feels his cheeks flush as he scoops the little girl into his arms, standing from the bed. "Oh," he coughs, walking toward his wife. He takes the device from her hand, forgetting he'd haphazardly tossed it on the television stand right next to their suitcases. "Yeah, uh, well, it's not Louis'," he explains, "but it's the same brand he uses."

"And… why do you have one?"

He grins, taking it from her and walking back over to the bed. She follows, plopping down onto the downy softness and taking Rose from him. She cuddles the baby girl into her arms, and Harvey's entire body melts at the sight.

"I wanted to make sure I caught all of the instructions and information we were given today," he states, pressing play on the dictaphone. Ming's voice comes from the small speaker, and Harvey looks to Donna. "I had it in my pocket in case it was against the rules."

He watches his wife's face practically melt from a confused expression to the softest of smiles he's ever seen. "Harvey," she breathes, scooting closer. She wraps one arm around his shoulder, propping her chin against his shoulder. "That is the most thoughtful, sweetest, sexiest thing you could have done."

"It was sexy?" he asks, eyebrows raising as he tilts his head down to look at her.

She husks out a breathy giggle near his ear, causing goosebumps to rise on his skin. "You thought ahead and planned something without me having to tell you what to do. And it was completely the right decision," she whispers, kissing his earlobe. "That is definitely sexy."

Well, then…

"Whatever you say," he says with a Cheshire Cat grin. He leans in, pressing a firm kiss to her lips. Her hand comes up to cup his cheek, and he deepens the embrace before Rose makes noise and her tiny hand juts out to smack down on Harvey's arm.

He pulls away laughing, bending down to kiss her chubby cheek. "Did Mommy steal Daddy's attention away from you?" he asks in what he can only describe as his dad-voice. "I'm sorry, baby."

"Oh my god," Donna snorts, "Who knew Harvey Specter even knew how to baby talk!"

He grins, shaking his head, saying their girl brings it out in him.

Harvey watches as Donna unbuttons Rose's outfit, the third of the day already, and changes her diaper, then her outfit. He marvels at how natural she seems at all of this, and smiles, knowing Donna was a natural at everything she set her mind to.

It's nearing bedtime now, they'd gone out for dinner at a restaurant a few blocks from their hotel. But now that they were settled in for the night, Rose having just finished her bottle, reality was hitting him. This was their new normal – bottles, diapers, bedtime routines… and he loves it.

Donna beams, laughing out a Ta-da! as she holds Rosie up for Harvey to see.

"What the hell is that?" he asks incredulously, eyes widening as he sees the red lettering against the white onesie. You Just Got Litt Up glaring at him from the baby's belly. "Our daughter is not wearing that, Donna."

She snickers, rolling her eyes as she lays Rose back down on the bed. She grabs her cellphone, snapping a picture of the baby's latest look.

"And you're documenting it?" he asks, leaning down to the baby. "I'm sorry, baby, Mommy seems to have lost her mind."

The baby wiggles on the bed at the sound of his voice, and Donna pulls her gently back to them to tickle her little toes.

Donna smirks, reminding him, "Relax. No one is going to see it but us."

"And thank God for that," he grumbles, looking back to the onesie, then looking over at Donna's phone screen. "And you're sending it to Louis?"

Laughing, she presses send on the phone before locking it and placing it on the bedside table. She tells him to relax, again, saying it's just for her to sleep in.

Smirking, he tells her, "That's a good idea, no one will be forced to see it," then laughs when Rose toots, Harvey making a remark about him feeling the same way about Louis' catchphrase.

The couple laughs, spending the next few minutes fawning over their adorable baby, Donna taking more pictures than Harvey thinks her phone can possibly hold.

Before they get too tired, Donna steps into the kitchen, fixing Rose's nighttime bottle and handing it to Harvey who dutifully picks up the baby, cradling her and letting her eat. They talk while she eats, deciding they need to FaceTime Mike and Rachel before Rose falls asleep. Donna sends her a text, knowing its beyond early over in Seattle, and asks her if they want to chat.

Donna's phone pings with a reply a few minutes later, Rachel responding with far too many exclamation marks for someone who was more than likely just woken up from a deep sleep.

Harvey smirks, shaking his head as he places Rose's empty bottle on the night stand while Donna pulls out her iPad to FaceTime Rachel and Mike.

The younger girl answers faster than Harvey thinks the device even had time to ring, and he grins when their best friends' faces are smashed into the screen together, their cheeks pressed right up against one anothers.

Mike is practically leaning into the camera, and Harvey reminds him to lean back so they could do something other than count his nose hairs.

The younger man rolls his eyes, his eyes roaming around, clearly trying to catch a glimpse of the baby.

"Looking for something, Mike?" Harvey asks, his eyes glancing over to Donna, then back to the screen. Their backs are settled against the headboard, Rose nestled between them but out of sight from the camera. Harvey's hand rests on her belly, the little girl playing with his fingers, gnawing on one as she drools and gurgles in the distance. "I thought you guys just wanted to chat before we head off to bed."

"Come on, you two!" Rachel interrupts. "We love you, but let us see that baby!"

Donna laughs, beaming as she hands Harvey the iPad to hold. She picks Rosie up in her arms, turning her to face the camera. "Evelyn Rose," she gushes, pressing kisses to her cheek. "Meet Aunt Rachel and Uncle Mike."

Taking the little girl's hand in hers, Donna motions it up and down in the air as if the baby was waving, and Harvey laughs when Rachel babbles through the device. "Look at her!"

They talk for a few minutes, Donna apologizing that they had to wake up so early to talk to them. "We should have called earlier, after dinner or something," she says, looking guilty, "but we were trying to give her a bath and fix bottles, and–"

"–Hey," Mike chuckles, wrapping his arm around Rachel's shoulder, "we get it!"

"I'd wake up at four in the morning any day of the week if it meant I got to meet my little niece," Rachel gushes.

Harvey grins, saying they'll have to call tomorrow around eleven, before they go grab lunch, so that Bobby can meet her, too.

Nodding, Rachel tells them that the little boy has been toddling around the house for the last few days asking When baby coming? which makes Donna and Harvey both laugh.

"I can't believe how big he's getting," Donna says, handing Rose to Harvey while she takes the iPad.

He smiles down at this little girl, watching as her eyes grow heavy. He props her up on his shoulder, rubbing her back gently as the women discuss Bobby's first birthday and how what a success his party was a few weeks ago.

Mike catches Harveys eye and they mutually roll theirs at one another, knowing good and well their wives had already had this discussion before they left for China.

"Alright, well," Mike says, motioning toward Harvey and Rose through the screen, "looks like bedtime is fast approaching for that one."

"Harvey or Rose?" Donna deadpans, and everyone laughs, including Harvey, knowing that their first day as parents was exhausting and they will (hopefully, but probably not) be sleeping very well tonight.

They hang up, Donna placing the iPad down on the nightstand. She laughs, turning the screen back to Harvey, saying they got a message from Louis while they were talking to the Ross'.

Brilliant! She and Lucy can wear matching Litt gear when you guys come to visit! His message reads, and Harvey rolls his eyes in feigned annoyance.

Donna laughs, locking the iPad and saying she'll respond back to him tomorrow.

Harvey smirks, scooping Rose back into his arms. He can't seem to get enough of holding her, loving the feel of her little body pressed to his. He peppers kisses to her cheek before whispering, "You were worth the wait."

Donna leans into his side at that, nodding and agreeing. "She definitely was."

They stare down at their little girl for a few more minutes, her eyes having closed as she drifted off to sleep in Harvey's arms a while ago, before Donna declares it's officially time to get her in bed.

Standing from the bed, Harvey carries Rose across the room and places her down in her bassinet. "She looks so tiny in there," he whispers, worrying his lip. "What if she wakes up and gets scared because we're not there?"

Donna smiles, wrapping her arms about Harvey's waist. She rests her head on his shoulder as they watch the bed softly sway their little girl to sleep. "She'll be fine, Harvey," she murmurs. "We'll turn off the rocker function once she's good and asleep. And our bed is right there." She points toward their bed, and he nods, knowing she's right.

"You seem so calm," he admits, pulling her down onto the bed with him.

She shakes her head, assuring him that she's freaking out just as much. "But when you're all up in a tizzie, I feel like I have to be the calm one."

He smirks, pressing a kiss to her lips. Donna tugs on his hand, telling him they should each take a turn showering before getting ready for bed.

Nodding, he tells her he'll hop in, and Donna says she'll be in the living room watching tv. "Maybe we can find a Chinese version of Survivor," she quips with a flick of her eyebrow, and he rolls his eyes, walking into the bathroom.

He takes one more peek at Rose, making sure she's sleeping peacefully, before grabbing his towel. As he goes, his mind drifts back to the first time he ever saw his little girl...

"Harvey," Donna calls, walking into the kitchen with tears in her eyes. She's holding her laptop, and he looks up from where he's been cooking, questioning her.

"Donna? What is it?" He turns the stove down low, slinging the dish towel over one shoulder as he makes his way over to her.

Her hands are shaking when he reaches her, and she holds up the thin laptop, saying it was an email from the adoption agency. "It's the picture."

His heart stops, excitement and nerves all mixing together and running throughout his body. They knew their birth mom was giving birth soon, and Ming had told them that she'd send them a picture of the baby once she was born, but now it was here, and he couldn't contain himself.

"Open it," he urges, gently pulling her over to a barstool at the island.

Donna clicks on the attachment, tears instantly springing from her eyes when the image loads and she sees their daughter for the first time. "Look at her. She's beautiful, Harvey."

His eyes fill with tears as well as he reaches out to the picture, as if he could physically hold it, staring down into the thin, brown eyes of his little girl. "That's our daughter," he whispers in astonishment. "She's really here."

Donna nods, and Harvey asks what her name is. She reads the email over, turning the screen to him so he could see it as well. "Caihong," she reads.

"I wonder what it means," he muses, explaining to Donna that Jon at work, an Asian man who had come to America from Hong Kong as a child, told him that Asian culture was all about giving meaningful names.

Harvey clicks on the computer screen, pulling up a new internet tab so he can search the meaning of her name.

Donna stands, walking over to stir the vegetables cooking on the stove.

He gasps, catching the attention of his wife, and he blows out deeply, trying to contain the tears threatening to fall. He's never been an emotional man, but things like this throw him off his game sometimes. And it seems that more and more often, when it comes to their journey of adoption, he can't contain the emotions.

"Harvey?" she asks, walking over to him again. "What is it?"

"Caihong means 'Beautiful Rainbow'."

Donna begins to cry at that as well, biting down on her lip. She places her forehead against his and they breathe together, in and out, calming their heart beats.

"She really is our rainbow baby, afterall," she whispers into the space between them.

Another tear trickles down his cheek, and Harvey sniffles, nodding as he tilts his head up to place a loving kiss to his wife's lips.

{****************************}

She flops onto the couch in the hotel's living room next to Harvey. She's just had her shower and changed into her pajamas, hair wrapped up in the towel, and more exhausted than she thought possible. "She's out like a light still," she says, sighing contentedly as she settles into his side. "Did you find Survivor? Or maybe Oprah comes on late at night here."

"Stop it," he whines with a snort, swatting at her leg. "We would have discovered that over the last week already if she did."

She grins, taking the remote from him and turning the television off. "How long do you think she'll sleep tonight?"

Harvey shrugs, glancing at his watch. "She slept for what, four hours earlier? And the social worker today said around now, the four and five month olds were sleeping about eight hours a night. So I expect she'll be waking up around, what, four?"

"They also said her sleep pattern might be interrupted with the change of scenery."

He nods. "True, but I have faith in our girl."

Smirking, Donna agrees, hoping that he's right. She fears that taking Rose from the only home she's known could be jarring. She'd seemed fine all day, happily going with them to lunch and around town. She was perfectly content playing in the hotel with the toys they'd bought for her all day, only crying when she was hungry or needed a new diaper, and Donna was worried that it was too good to be true.

Sighing, she tries to relax, musing, "Who knew we'd be so tired after just one day of being parents? It's not even ten o'clock!"

A sound that is a mix of a scoff and a laugh comes from Harvey's throat, and she sits up, looking at him curiously. "You knew so, huh?"

He nods, saying he always assumed the first day would be exhausting. "We were trying to make a good impression on her, even though she's only four months old, and that took a lot out of us," he says, pressing his lips to the junction between her shoulder and neck. His tongue peeks out, swirling on the pulse point that she loves so much.

Donna moans, a hand coming to cup the back of his head and hold him there. He presses a half dozen more pecks to her neck, nipping at her jaw, before pulling back with a seductive grin on his face.

"I guess we should get used to being tired, though," he muses. "Mike and Rachel have been exhausted for the past year."

Snickering, she pulls herself onto his lap, straddling his waist. Her knee hits the remote, and she grunts, reaching down to toss it onto the coffee table behind her.

She wraps her arms around his neck, leaning down to press her lips to his. She deepens the kiss, tongue tracing his lips. He parts his, letting her tongue slip between. It pulls a groan from her husband, and she smiles coyly into their embrace, feeling him harden beneath her.

God, she's been wanting this all day. Well, not all day, most of her day was consumed with Rose and the excitement of finally having her with them, but Harvey, dad Harvey, is hotter than any version of her husband she's ever seen, and she can't quite contain her hormones.

Harvey grips her waist, hands pulsing there as she writhes against him. Her hand snakes between their bodies, reaching beneath the hem of his sweat pants and boxers to wrap her hand around his length. "Not too tired for this, though," she husks, moving her hand up and down.

At that, Harvey flips them in one fluid motion, a surprised yelp falling from her lips before she giggles. He covers her mouth with his, lips trailing from her lips to her neck, then further still as his hands lift the silk cami.

She shimmies, helping him remove her top before his lips find her nipples, licking and swirling, bringing them to hardened peaks. Moaning, because, mmm, fuck, that feels amazing, she resumes her ministrations on his cock, hand moving up and down, her thumb teasing the tip of him.

He shudders on top of her, moaning and making quick work of his bottoms, then hers, before climbing back above her body. She smirks, loving the way she can rile him up like this.

They kiss, caress, and explore, the moonlight bathing their naked forms from the windows. Harvey reaches down, running his finger through her folds. And shit, she feels like she didn't justfuck him last night, and the night before, and that very same morning, but damn, there's something about the way he's touching her tonight. Tender, yet hot and passionately, making every nerve in her body tingle just for him. He teases her clit, thumb pressing and swirling, working her up close to her edge already.

"Harvey," she pants, pulling him down for a kiss. "Inside me. Now."

She watches as his brown eyes darken, almost black now with lust, as he sinks inside of her. Yes, fuck, yes, this is what she needed. Once he's fully sheathed inside her, he begins to move in and out, drawing one moan after another from her.

He feels amazing, somehow better than ever before, which she didn't think was possible. He fills her completely, hitting so deep inside of her that she's convinced she could see stars if she closed her eyes. Fuck, she loves this man, loves how he makes her feel. She moans again, this time a raspy grunt that she's unable to control. "You're going to wake the baby," she reminds him in a lustful huff, scratching at the back of his head as he moves inside of her again, hitting that sweet spot with more force than before.

Harvey gives her his signature Cheshire Cat grin, thrusting in, then out, then deeper in again, saying, "I'm not the one moaning so loudly."

It's with that thrust that he hits just the right spot, the one that always makes her turn into a pile of wanton goo right before his eyes, and she cries out, bringing a hand up to muffle her cries of passion.

He's not far behind, spilling into her with a series of grunts that he bites his lip to contain.

They lay there, sated and spent, sweat covered bodies breathing in synchronicity. They catch their breath, Donna trailing her fingers through the back of his hair again. "We're going to need another shower now," she chuckles.

Harvey raises up, looking down into her eyes as he smiles contentedly. "You go," he says, "I'll join you in a few minutes."

She shakes her head as she stands, grabbing his hand and pulling him up with her, saying she doesn't want to wait a few more minutes.

Quirking an eyebrow, he smirks at her, linking their hands together and allowing Donna to pull him into the bathroom.

They make quick work of washing their bodies, hands roaming, but merely helping each other clean on, Donna worried Rose would wake up with both of them in here and cry for too long. She washes off her body, pecking Harvey on the lips before telling him to relax, she was going to hop out and check on Rose.

He nods, kissing her back, and promising he won't be too long. He's already showered once, after all, so she smiles, slipping out and grabbing her towel.

As she gingerly walks into the bedroom, drying off and throwing her pajamas back on, she reminisces about the day they'd just found out about Rose's birth mom and how excited they'd been.

They walk in, Chinese take out in hand, as Donna announces, "We're here!"

Mike takes the bag, closing the door behind them as Harvey takes her jacket for her.

The four of them settle around the kitchen table, Rachel dishing out lo mein to everyone while Harvey searches for the eggrolls.

"We're going to have to bring back plenty of these for you guys," Harvey says, giving Donna a playful wink.

She looks to Mike, then Rachel, an excited smile growing on her face. The couple look confused before realization finally hits the brunette. "You guys found a birth mom!?"

Donna nods happily, telling Harvey to pull up her picture.

Dutifully, he reaches into his pocket, pulling up the email with the birth mother's information. He turns his phone around, showing Mike and Rachel her picture as Donna explains the situation.

They know it's early, they've only been in the system for three months, but this girl chose them. "She's four months pregnant already," Donna explains, "and we wouldn't be able to go get the baby for a few months once she's born, but yeah, within the next year, we'll have our baby!"

Looking down at Rose as she sleeps, Harvey's shower running soothingly in the background, Donna thinks about that night when they told Mike and Rachel about the birth mom, how excited they'd all felt, the nerves and anxiousness Donna was feeling. But now, looking at her little girl, she can't believe that was only a few months ago. They'd only had Rose for a day, but the instant she was placed in Donna's arms, it felt as if she'd been there all along.

Leaning down, Donna breathes in the sweet baby scent wafting from her girl, then presses a kiss to her fingertips, placing them against Rose's pouty pink lips. Her hand trails down to softly rest against her belly, comforted by the up and down motion.

Hearing the bathroom door open, Donna smiles down at her daughter one more time, then steps over to the bed, climbing in and taking out her book as Harvey readies himself for bed.

"Goodnight," he says to Rosie, his hand reaching out to rub her little foot that's covered by her footie pajamas. He walks over to their bed, climbing in and turning out the bedside lamp on his side.

He looks over, smiling at her. Donna looks up from her book, placing the bookmark where she left off and setting it on the table. She turns off the lamp on her side, bathing the room in darkness save for the moonlight and cuddles into his side.

With whispered I love yous, they drift off to sleep, the soft grunts of their baby girl filling the room in the most perfect of ways.

{*****************************}

It's the pitiful cries coming from the bassinet that wake him. He rolls over, untangling his arms from around Donna. His eye peeks open, glancing at his cell phone through bleary eyes. 6:30am.

Harvey smiles. A little earlier than he was expecting, but this is their new normal, and he's actually excited to get up and start the day with Rosie.

"Hey, there," he whispers, reaching in to pick her up. "Did you sleep well last night?"

He knows she didn't sleep well, she seemed to grunt and move around throughout the night, waking up around midnight with a piercing cry that jostled them to their feet instantly. Donna had scooped her up, shushing and singing a soft lullaby to her until she fell back asleep in her arms. They'd stayed awake for almost an hour with Rose sleeping in Donna's embrace, making sure she was truly in a deep slumber before placing her back in her bed. She'd slept soundly until three o'clock when she'd woken them up with the beginnings of a cry, clearly wanting to be fed again. After that, it was another three hours of sleep, giving him and Donna a handful of restful hours to snooze.

He presses a kiss to her nose, Rose's cries instantly dying down to whimpers. He looks to the bed, noticing that Donna is watching them. "Good morning, Mommy," he murmurs sleepily, waving Rose's hand in her direction.

Donna laughs tiredly, rolling out of bed and padding over to them. They make their way into the other bedroom where they'd placed all her diapers and clothes (which Donna continues to mock him for insisting they needed, despite him knowing deep down she is thankful for the extra storage space), and he hands her off to Donna to change their daughter out of the hideous Litt onesie while he fixes them all breakfast.

He makes his way into the kitchen, taking out his travel size bottle of vanilla from the cabinet and starting the coffee maker. Coffee was already an essential need in their household, but with the way they slept, he knows it's a necessity today (and for the next decade or so). Once the coffee has started brewing, he takes out the pans to make omelettes for them both. He's just finishing the second one when Donna comes out with a more alert Rose in her arms.

"Here we go!" Donna announces, bouncing their little girl in her embrace. "Changed and ready to conquer the day."

"That's my girl!" he exclaims, handing Donna her vanilla coffee and plate, taking Rose from her arms. He takes one of the pre-measured bottles of formula out of the refrigerator, preparing and shaking it thoroughly while Rose grabs at it.

He chuckles, pretending to eat her cheeks as he tells the baby she needs to be patient. She cries a little as he shakes the bottle near her, clearly knowing it's time for a meal. Before her fussing can get too loud, he hands her the bottle. She's pretty good already, gripping at the bottle, and he's almost positive she could hold it all on her own, but he worries, doesn't want her to spill any or drop it, so he keeps a hand close by, giving the bottle enough pressure that it stays up while she does most of the work in holding it to her mouth.

He tries to balance baby in one hand and plate in the other so he can join Donna at the kitchen table, and he manages, barely, causing his wife to laugh. "I could have brought your food over for you," she says, "though you look like a natural already balancing her and something else. Where'd you learn to do that?"

He looks sheepish, giving her a little shrug as he sets his plate down, stepping back into the kitchen to grab his coffee. He sits, cutting his omelette up with his fork in one hand. "I helped Marcus and Katie a lot with the kids when I'd visit," he confesses, sipping his warm beverage. "I didn't go often, but when Marcus was sick, I tried to go more, you know?"

She nods, and he knows she knows because she was always the one to book his trips back then. "It's sexy," she purrs, wiggling her eyebrows, "you being a natural dad and all."

He purses his lips, giving her a come hither look that draws her in playfully. She smirks, leaning in to press her lips to his before settling back into her seat. "Daddy is being silly, Rosie."

After breakfast, Donna cleans their dishes ("You cooked, it's only fair," she'd said), while Harvey plays with Rose in the living room. They have a mat splayed out in the middle of the floor, a slew of toys all around, and a floor playset he'd had to pay extra to ship over to China from Seattle. It'd arrived the other day, and Harvey had spent the entire afternoon trying to assemble each part, wanting each ocean animal to hang just right, the plastic light up piano keys to all work perfectly, and the little reflective mirror to be as clean as possible so Rose could spend hours discovering herself and all the sounds each item made.

It's fascinating, watching her. She's so curious. So enamored by each new sound and light she sees, and each time she looks surprised or her little face lights up at a new discovery, he and Donna laugh and share a loving look.

They're on the floor with her now, sitting criss-cross, their knees touching as they both encourage her to roll onto her back as she kicks her little legs.

He laughs at the sight before him, never thinking his greatest accomplishment in the day would be watching his daughter grab at a toy that makes a crunchy sound before sticking it into her drool covered mouth, but, well, here he is, heart full of pride as he smiles at Rose. She looks over to him, head lifting from the floor where she's having 'tummy time' and his heart feels as if it could explode with the love he has for her.

"It's almost lunch time," he tells Donna glancing at his watch. He snaps another picture of Rose on her belly, sending it to Marcus, before asking, "Do you want to make something here or take her out?"

They decide on getting ready and going out, knowing some fresh air could do them all some good. He'd stay cramped inside a hotel with his girls forever if he could but knows experiencing China while they're here will be important.

"Let me just record you two playing right quick, then I'll get her ready."

He smiles, shaking his head as Donna turns the video function on on her phone. She talks into the camera, explaining to a future-Rose that this was their first morning together. "Here's Daddy on his tummy with you, baby girl," she explains, filming the length of Harvey's body as he lays on the floor, face inches from Rose on her belly, too.

Donna has been trying to record snippets of days here in China, including the ones leading up to getting Rose. She's going to have Benjamin splice them all together to make a video of their journey that they can play for Rose each year on the anniversary of the day they adopted her. "It's your Gotcha Day, sweet girl, and just remember that Mommy and Daddy love you very much!" Donna tells the camera when she turns it to face herself.

"Gotcha Day?" he asks, and she presses stop on the video, picking Rosie up and cuddling into her.

"Yeah," she giggles, "The day we got her." Donna shrugs as if it's the most obvious thing in the world. "We'll play the video each Gotcha Day, so I figured it needed a name."

He smiles, telling her she's adorable, before sitting up to pick up one of the many toys on the floor.

Donna wiggles closer to Rose, talking to her about each toy surrounding them. She explains the mirror, pointing to it, then exclaiming, "That's you, beautiful!" and smiling as Rose reaches out for the reflective surface.

Harvey can feel that he has the stupidest grin plastered on his face, all teeth showing, but he couldn't care less. Watching his wife and daughter play together is a sight he never wants to not see.

Donna picks up Rose then, sliding next to Harvey where he sits with his back against the couch. He pats her knee, nose crinkling as he makes a goofy face at their little girl. Laying Rose back against her thighs, they both stare down at her, memorizing every aspect of her features.

Donna holds her chubby little hands in hers, trailing over each tiny finger, thumb tracing her palms as she tells Rose over and over again how much she loves her. "I'm like… so in love with her, Harvey."

Grinning, he nods. "Me, too. It's crazy."

She looks at him then, her eyes misting over. Harvey places his arm around her shoulders, bringing his girls closer to him. He reaches out, playing with Rose's little foot as he asks Donna what's wrong.

Shaking her head, she smiles and shrugs. "I just feel such a strong connection with her." She sniffles, wiping under her eye. "I was honestly afraid that I couldn't feel this way."

"You were?" he asks, and at her nod, he admits he was fearful of that too. "But she's ours, Donna, really ours, and I've never loved anyone like this."

With a wet chuckle, his wife agrees, looking back to their girl. "She's perfect."

She looks back at Rose, then quickly grabs her cell phone, declaring, "Oh! I forgot to show you this, Rosie."

Donna pulls up a picture of the space needle, turning the phone around so the little girl can see. "This is your home, baby," she explains, "we'll be there in a few days."

Chuckling, Harvey takes the phone, typing in New York City. He clicks on a picture of the skyline, showing it to Rose. "But this is your real home."

Donna grins over at him, shrugging defeatedly as she agrees.

Harvey hufs in amusement, placing a quick kiss to her cheek before standing. He tells her he's going to go throw on clothes while she changes Rose's diaper. "I'll get the diaper bag ready while you change."

"Sounds good," she grins, patting him on the rear as she walks into the other bedroom. "But you will have to change a dirty diaper at some point, Harvey." He chuckles from the bedroom, knowing she's right.

The afternoon goes by quickly, lunch is delicious, and he's convinced he'll never eat Chinese food back home again because nothing can compare to this cuisine. They have plans to meet up with Ming for dinner tonight, but he's excited to spend the rest of the day with not just the love of his life, but now their little girl, too.

He doesn't think he's ever been this happy before.

"You ready?" he asks Donna, making sure that she had her take away food.

She nods, saying there's a baby store she saw on their walk here that she wants to stop into, and Harvey grins, knowing it wouldn't be a day out with Donna without a shopping trip.

As he places his daughter onto his chest via the carrier, a tiny hand reaching out for his finger, his eyes mist over as he's overcome with the amount of love he has for their daughter.

They have a few more days here, and he's tempted to keep them all inside so he can soak up every coo and giggle of hers without the distraction of the outside world. After their shopping trip, he decides, they'll go 'home' and relax and play all day, spending the sunlight hours getting to know every facet of Rose's personality before dinner with Ming.

Going home to Seattle will be great, Mike and Rachel are thrilled to finally meet Rose in person, but Harvey has to admit that he likes this little family bubble that now surrounds them.

Donna comes over then from her side of the table, pulling him from his thoughts as she loops her arm through his. He smiles over at her, then checks again that his baby girl is secured to his chest before they make their way from the market and back to their suite for the rest of the day.

{****************************}

A week later, once visas and passports and all other legal documentation have finally been secured, their time in China has come to an end. Donna has Rose in her arms, bouncing her in the seat as the baby cries and cries from the take off of the airplane.

She hates this, hates seeing her in pain, but she knows the pressure will change and hopefully will even out inside her tiny little ear drums. They're in first class, thankfully, and she's for once glad that Harvey likes to splurge, treating them to the nicer flying cabin. There's a little more room, definitely enough room for Donna and Rose to sit comfortably in her seat together, room at her feet to lay out a blanket for Rose to play with toys on this thirteen hour long flight.

She'd thought ahead, packing snacks for the people in the seats around them with an apology note for the crying, which Harvey had the flight attendant pass out earlier.

There's an old woman in the seat behind them mumbling something about how they should've stayed where they were instead of forcing a baby onto an airplane, and Donna's mama bear instincts kick in faster than she expected. She turned around, crying baby in her arms, and a rattled expression upon her face. "I'm sorry," she seethes toward the woman, who looks utterly stunned that the red head would speak up, "but would you prefer my husband and I move to China or bring our daughter home from the orphanage?"

The woman stutters, mouth falling and opening like a fish out of water, when Harvey steps over to Donna's pod seat, wrapping an arm around her waist and giving the older woman behind them a tight smile. "She'll settle down now that we're in the air," he assures in his best lawyer voice, before turning himself and Donna around.

Donna sits with a huff, Harvey crouching down to ask if she wants him to take Rose for a bit. Shaking her head, she tells him it'll be fine. "She's settling down now," she says, looking hopeful as she glances down to Rose and back to Harvey.

"Excuse me," a woman says from the aisle.

Donna looks up, an apology already forming on her lips when the young woman holds up a pacifier. "Sucking on her pacifier can help relieve the pressure build up," she says, "it's like us chewing on gum." She tells Donna that giving the baby Ibuprofen about half an hour before the flight also helps, "just for future reference," she smiles, chin jutting toward the direction of her sleeping toddler and newborn peacefully sitting in his dad's lap across the way.

She asks Donna if her baby has a pacifier, and Donna jumps into action, digging through the diaper bag frantically, knowing she put one in there. Harvey clears his throat, sliding a hand into the side pocket and pulling one out. She gives him an exasperated look, then a defeated smile, placing it into Rose's mouth. Her cries stop immediately, and Donna sighs out in relief, thanking the woman, but also feeling a lick of shame that she hadn't thought to give Rose that already.

The woman must read her mind, an unspoken motherly bond between them, because she shrugs, adding, "it took me about five different times flying before I finally realized what an easy solution that was." The woman giggles, informing her that giving Rose a bottle to drink is also good to keep her ears from popping as much. Donna smiles gratefully, and the woman thanks her for the snacks, saying her toddler will be thrilled when she wakes up.

Smiling, Donna sighs, nerves shot from the embarrassment she felt of having the only crying baby on the plane. But she looks down at Rose, nothing but a few mere whimpers coming from her as she snuggles into Donna's chest, and she decides to cut herself some slack, no matter what the bitter old Betty in the row behind her had to say. She was new at this, she was allowed to make a few mistakes.

Sighing out in relief once more, Donna closes her eyes and lets her head fall against the headrest. She peeks one eye open, catching a glimpse of her husband. He's smiling as he takes his seat next to her, and she grins at him, reaching out to take his hand.

He reaches out, and she hands Rose over to him, a tiny cry leaving her at the movement. Harvey shushes into her dark hair, whispering something that Donna can't quite make out. She watches from the seat beside him, though, as he talks soothingly to their little girl. He smiles tenderly into the crown of her head, laughing to himself as if having a conversation with Rosie. Her big brown eyes peer up at him, completely entranced as if Harvey's voice is the sun peeking out from the clouds after a terrible storm.

He holds her chubby little hand, playing with each finger as he talks to her, and Donna doesn't think she's ever felt this much love for two people in her entire life. Her whole body tingles, the hairs on the back of her neck standing on end as she watches her husband talk with their daughter.

It's adorable, and she'd gladly let him always be the one to hold her if this is the sight she'd get to see.

He hands her back after another twenty minutes, Rose's eyes growing heavy as sleep pulls her under. Donna snuggles with her in the seat, singing quietly in her ear as she rocks the baby to sleep.

She falls asleep within the hour, and is thankfully out for the next six, allowing Donna time to eat, and sleep, and worry about how well her daughter is sleeping on the plane. She and Harvey talk for a while, excited to see Mike and Rachel when they land.

"I'm not ready to go back to work, though," he admits, causing Donna to cock an eyebrow at him.

"Harvey Specter? Not wanting to work?"

He gives her a sheepish shrug, confessing that the past week has been nice with Rose around, and he doesn't want to miss anything. "She'll be crawling before we know it."

Donna smiles gently, nodding and saying she doesn't want to miss anything either. "But we have to work if we want to keep affording these first class flights," she jokes, pointing to the cabin around her, "because now that you've spoiled me with this, Mama ain't ever flying economy again."

Harvey snorts, shaking his head as he agrees that it's only the best for his girls from here on out.

Seven hours later, they finally land in Seattle, exhausted, in need of a shower, but completely happy and in love with their little family.

Rose had been pleasant and happy the rest of the flight. She got plenty of sleep, ate a few bottles, and played at Donna's feet or in her and Harvey's laps while her parents took turns sleeping.

As soon as they step into baggage claim, Donna instantly hears a squeaked, "Aunt Don!" coming from the crowd. She beams as she looks through the throngs of people for her little nephew, spotting Rachel's long, flowing locks almost instantly.

"Hey, guys!" she exclaims, taking Harvey's hand and leading him over to where the Ross family awaits. Donna places her hand on Rose's back where she's strapped to Donna's front.

She'd packed her carry on in a backpack, thankfully, so her hands were free, making traveling with a baby much easier.

When they get to Mike and Rachel, Donna immediately starts crying, wrapping Rachel in a hug. It doesn't last long, though, because Rachel is pulling apart, bending down to greet Rosie. She taps the end of her button nose, cooing her hello to the baby.

Mike claps Harvey on the back, then steps over to Donna, clutching Bobby to his side. Donna unstraps Rose, handing her to Rachel as she hugs Mike and picks up Bobby.

She peppers kisses to his little cheeks, telling him how much she missed him.

They make their way over to the luggage carousel, Harvey grabbing their suitcases when they come around.

Before long, Rose is whimpering, reaching out for Harvey when she spots him. He smiles like a proud papa, reaching out to take his baby girl from Rachel's arms.

Mike chuckles, muttering something about how he's already whipped, but Harvey just shrugs, nodding and agreeing with him. He kisses Rose's cheek, then looks to Donna.

She signals that she has both suitcases, and Mike steps in, taking one from her as they all exit the airport and climb into Mike's SUV.

"I can't believe she's here!" Rachel squeals once they get onto the interstate.

Smiling, Donna agrees, quadruple-checking that Rose is strapped in correctly and securely, fiddling with her tiny fingers in the backseat. Harvey is upfront with Mike, both men discussing a case Mike's been working on over the last two weeks, while Rachel admires all of Rose's features and Bobby babbles on about his snack that he had this morning.

"You guys lucked out," Mike comments, glancing at Donna through the rear view mirror. "It's been raining like crazy for the past week–"

"–This is Seattle, Mike," Harvey deadpans. "It's always raining."

The younger man scoffs, grinning as he tells them the rain has been nonstop. "Today is the first day it hasn't rained."

"Well," Rachel pipes up, declaring, "it rained this morning, but stopped right before we left for the airport."

Donna smiles, thinking how poetic it was that the skies provided a temporary relief in the storms for them to land safely and not have to get drenched unloading the car.

The four of them all talk the rest of the way to Donna and Harvey's apartment, and they agree to have dinner tomorrow night so Donna and Harvey can settle in tonight. It's their first night in their home with Rose, and as they pull up to their apartment, nerves overwhelm her.

The hotel had been fine, China was normal for Rose, but here, in Seattle? There's new noises, sounds, people, buildings… everything is new to her baby girl, and she's scared she won't sleep well or will somehow feel homesick. She has this sudden fear, albeit unfounded, that she won't be a good mother. China was like a vacation for them, but this is real life. This is forever. It's the most important role she's ever taken on, and as confident as she may seem, she is actually shaking on the inside, terrified that she'll somehow screw Rose up in the long run.

"It'll be okay," Rachel calms, squeezing her hand.

Donna smiles, thankful that Rachel can read her mind in this moment.

She mumbles that she's just worried something will go wrong, and Rachel nods, telling her she and Mike felt the same exact way when they brought Bobby home from the hospital. "You just have to remember that this is your child. No one else's opinion matters."

"Yeah," Mike chirps from the front. "You're in total control, and we all know you're the most controlling person out of all of us!"

"Mike," Rachel admonishes, and his blue eyes shoot to Donna's in the back.

She lifts an eyebrow at him, pretending to scold him, and he cowers away like a scared puppy. "I was just teasing, Mom!" he amends, "I meant it as a compliment."

Her facade breaks, and she giggles, leaning up in the seat to press a kiss to Mike's cheek.

"Let me get your luggage out," Mike says, smiling back at the women before exiting the car.

Harvey opens her car door while Mike unloads their luggage from the back, and they all say their goodbyes, exchanging hugs and Rachel kissing Rose's chubby cheek before Mike joins in on the kiss fest.

Donna and Harvey do the same to Bobby, promising to call tomorrow morning once they get up.

"Sounds good," Mike agrees happily, hugging Harvey again. "And don't worry about work, man," he assures, "whenever you're ready, come on back. But take your time, enjoy the next few weeks with your new baby."

Harvey smiles and thanks him, and Donna watches the exchange, proud of how mature Mike has become over the last few years.

Holding Rosie close to her, she gives her a little bounce which makes the baby squeal, her tiny hand reaching out toward the apartment building, then up to the sky. Donna's eyes trail upward, her eyes landing on a giant rainbow resting above their building, and emotion instantly swells in her heart, and throat, and she looks to Harvey and then their miracle baby. Her and Harvey's eyes both mist over with tears at the sight of the colorful prism shining down on them, soothing Donna's fears of being inadequate in a heartbeat. "That's right, baby girl," she murmurs tearfully into her soft, black hair, a megawatt smile gracing her features as she announces lovingly, "We're home."

{*******************************}

PHEW. Thanks for making it through this monster of a chapter lol. I hope you guys liked it! They finally have their sweet little Rose, and now the journey of parenthood begins! Lol The next chapter is the last, and there will be a little bit of a time jump. After that, I have an epilogue planned as well. Thanks for all the support! Please leave a review :)

Chapter Text

Chapter Eight:

They say time flies when you're having fun, but they also say life can change in the blink of an eye.

Over the last six months since returning from China, Harvey has definitely seen how fast time goes by, his baby girl growing and changing each and every day. Sometimes he swears she looks different at bed time than she did that morning waking up.

Tonight, though, when his phone rings, he learns just how quickly things can change...

He's on his way home, having had to work late. Donna was already at home with Rose, and as he steps into their apartment building, time seems to stand still.

"Harvey," he hears on the other end of the phone.

His steps falter halfway to the elevator, righting himself in time to press the button. "Louis? Is everything alright?"

He listens intently, his world slowing down as the happenings in the lobby around him seem to whizz by all at the same time.

The words fill his ears… Sheila's lymphoma spread to her blood cells… was doing better but she'd gotten a cold. "The infection spread to… to her chest," Louis chokes out, Harvey's stomach dropping at the words. "Harvey, she… she's gone."

He's shocked. Sheila was doing so well the last time they visited. Anger swells inside of him, though he's not sure who or what he's angry at. He tries to listen to Louis on the other end, but there's a ringing in his ears he can't seem to shake.

His head feels heavy, face hot as he fights off his own tears. Composing himself, he asks Louis how he's doing, although he knows what the answer is. Louis worships the literal ground Sheila walks, well, walked, on. Goddamn it. He loved her more than life itself just like Harvey does Donna. He would be a complete wreck right now if he were in his friend's situation.

His eyes close, knowing Louis' world is completely shaken in this moment. Harvey makes it to their floor, stopping just outside the front door as he continues to comfort Louis.

"I'm so sorry, Louis," he says again, asking if he needs anything.

Louis cries into the phone, practically sending Harvey to his knees as he presses his hand firmly to the wall just beside the front door to hold himself up. He may have fought with Louis to the ends of the earth and back over the years, but he'd grown to love this man more than most people in his life. Without ever really admitting it, Louis had actually become one of his best friends, and he knows Donna has considered him one of hers for many years. This will crush her, so he takes a deep, steadying breath, knowing he has to put on a brave face right now.

"What do you need, Louis?"

"Just hold Donna a little closer tonight," the man sniffles into the phone, and Harvey promises he will.

With that, he clears his throat, blinking the tears away as he turns the key in the lock. He walks into their apartment, and Rose's giggles instantly calm his aching heart.

"Dada!"

He smiles, despite the situation, and bends down to kiss the top of her head once she bounds over to him on wobbly little legs. She'd just started walking a month ago, earlier than they were expecting, but ever since that day, she's been like an adorable, miniature tornado tearing through their home. She palms at his pants, gripping the fabric and pulling herself up, her chubby arms reaching up to him.

He gives Donna a pleading look, knowing he can't focus right now, not with Louis in his ear explaining again what happened and crying. He's torn, and it puts him on edge, wanting to be present with his baby girl but wanting to finish his conversation with Louis. He's also battling a swirl of emotions, not able to imagine how he'd be feeling in this moment if it were Donna, isn't sure how Louis is able to even form coherent sentences right now. He knows he wouldn't be able to.

"What's wrong?" she mouths in his direction, seeing that he's on the phone.

He takes a slow, calming breath, not knowing how to break this news to her. But, he supposes, she's been the one to give him the gut-wrenching news twice now about his parents, he can do this.

"I just got home, Louis," he mumbles into the phone. "Let me talk to Donna and then we'll call you back."

"You promise?" Louis asks sadly, and Harvey's eyes sink closed, trying not to cry as he reassures the other man that they will.

He hangs up after promising twice more to call back and sets his phone down on the kitchen counter.

Harvey watches as Donna swings Rose into her arms, their daughter's laughter brightening the dark cloud hanging over him. His wife blows a raspberry onto the ten month old's belly before placing her down in the living room, turning on the television and ruffling her hair as she tells her to play in here while she talks to Daddy.

She joins him in the kitchen, eyes trailing over to the living room to look at Rose one more time. "Harvey," she starts hesitantly, situating herself onto a bar stool. She turns to face him, giving him a concerned look. "What's wrong?"

He closes his eyes again, calming his heartbeat and trying to form words. It's odd, really. He'd only gotten closer to Sheila over the last few years, really just since he and Donna moved to Seattle, but the sudden, jarring news that she's gone has turned him completely inside out.

"That was Louis," he tells her, voice shaking despite his efforts not to let it.

Donna gives him a look, clearly knowing that it was, so she urges him to tell her what's wrong.

"Sheila…" he trails off, clearing his throat. "Sheila's gone, Donna."

She gasps, a hand flying to her mouth as her eyes fill with tears. "No," she whispers, shaking her head. He watches as the news fully registers, his wife's eyes growing wide before slowly closing in utter despair. A lone tear slips through her lashes, and she takes a shuddering breath. Donna opens her eyes, head shaking back and forth as if she doesn't believe what he's told her, and Harvey pulls her into his arms, drawing strength from her as he, hopefully, gives her the same thing as tears trail down their cheeks.

Her body is shaking in his, and he shushes into her red hair, a hand trailing up and down her back. She'd changed into yoga pants and a t-shirt after work, so his hand slips under the cotton of her shirt, thumb tracing soothing patterns against her skin. She wilts into his embrace, tears wetting his neck, and he can't hold back his tears either. He whispers into her hair that everything will be okay, they'll get through this, and she nods, albeit sadly, before pulling back.

Donna gives him a sad smile, wiping under her eyes as he does the same.

"Mama!" Rose squeals, patting them both on the legs. She's toddled into the kitchen while they weren't paying attention, and Donna chuckles wetly, bending down to pick their daughter up.

"Hey, sweet girl," she coos, sniffling as she places a kiss to her little cheek.

"Sa?" she inquires in her baby babble, he assumes attempting to ask if Donna's sad by the curious little tilt of her head to the side as she touches her mother's wet cheek. Rose looks at him then, and he tries to smile.

He leans in, kissing her forehead, wiping another tear away as he pulls back.

"Sa?" she asks again, this time looking at Harvey.

He glances over to Donna, and they share a look, unsure of how to handle this. Harvey grins at Rose, taking her from Donna's arms. Her brown eyes are glossy, clearly picking up on the emotions of her parents, and his heart breaks, not wanting her to be sad just because they are. "No, baby, I'm not sad."

Tossing her in the air, he nibbles at her cheeks, pretending to eat them as she lands back in his arms, causing her to squeal out. Her laughter fills the apartment, and he and Donna both laugh, enjoying their moment of reprieve from their aching hearts.

They order Thai food for dinner, mutually deciding they don't want to cook tonight, then call Louis back while Rose plays with her toys. She teeters around, dancing in her own little way to the music coming from the movie on the TV, and Harvey finds so much peace in watching her as he listens to Donna console Louis.

That night, once Rosie is knocked out and softly snoring in her crib, Harvey and Donna settle onto the couch.

"I can't believe she's gone," Donna says somberly, taking a sip of her wine.

He shakes his head, still reeling from the news himself. "Poor Louis."

Taking the glass from her hands, he takes a sip, too, before setting it onto the coffee table. They call Mike and Rachel, having promised Louis that they'd handle breaking the news to their friends so that he didn't have to do it again.

Donna delivers the news, breaking down into tears again as she tells their friends that Sheila is gone, and all Harvey can do is rub reassuring patterns up and down her spine.

Rachel gasps into the phone, clearly unable to speak, so Mike speaks up, albeit with an obvious lump in his throat. "What can we do?"

Harvey looks to Donna, who shrugs. It's uncharacteristic of Donna to not be in complete control, to not already have a six step plan already forming in her mind, so he squeezes her hand, giving her a sympathetic look. "I don't know, Mike," he says sadly. "Obviously we need to head out there as soon as possible."

"I'm on it," Rachel says, her voice shaking. She tells the group that she's already got Delta's app pulled up on her phone and is booking flights for all of them this weekend.

"Make sure we get there Thursday or early Friday, Rach," Donna adds, saying she doesn't want to show up the day of the funeral. She wants to get there in time to help Louis plan everything.

Rachel confirms that they have an early morning flight on Friday, and the girls immediately start planning what to do–bags to pack for the kids, how many outfits, what they can cook for Louis and Lucy once they get there, and every other detail Harvey could possibly think of.

"We can stop by the store on our way to his house," Donna says, the fiery, take-charge woman he fell in love with starting to spring to life. "We can watch Lucy and cook a few meals to freeze, while you guys help him in whatever way is needed."

Harvey nods, and he assumes Mike is giving his wife the same silent acknowledgement, as Donna and Rachel continue to make plans.

Rachel relays the flight information, confirming the arrival time as Donna jots it down in her phone.

"Thanks, Rachel," Donna says, knowing if Rachel hadn't jumped into action, she would've been the one to do it for all of them. "I just can't imagine what Louis is going through right now."

There's a melancholy silence between the four friends before Mike speaks up again. "I wonder what he's going to tell Lucy in the morning?"

A heavy sigh reverberates amongst all of them, and Donna's hazel eyes mist over again.

Harvey's heart aches, knowing he'd never be able to find the words to tell his own child that their mother was gone.

"I'll text Louis now and tell him we'll all be there Friday afternoon," Donna says, obviously trying to change the subject, everyone unsure of what to say.

They agree to all meet at Donna and Harvey's apartment Friday morning to ride to the airport together. Rachel and Mike are going to head back to Seattle the day after the funeral, while the Paulsen-Specters spend a few extra days in the city.

After a few more minutes of working out the logistics, they hang up, Harvey checking the baby monitor while Donna texts Louis telling him their plans and that they'll do anything he needs help with.

Harvey closes his eyes, Gordon's jazz playing softly in the background as Donna snuggles into his side with a defeated sigh. "Everything just changed so quickly," she says, and he feels a lone tear slip from her eye to his shirt. Harvey tightens his grip around her shoulders, thinking about their life here, and how so much really has changed.

Work has been pretty shitty lately, he has to admit. There was a case that didn't end well. He, Mike and Rachel had all worked endlessly on a huge sexual harassment and poisoned work environment case that dates back decades and involves many high powered individuals, causing him to work far later for far too many nights in a row than he normally did.

They'd spent months trying to settle the case, knowing that their plaintiffs didn't want to come forward but in the end, it wasn't enough and the big guys won, getting their plaintiffs to drop out one by one and eventually, getting the case dismissed, causing a lot of upset around the office, especially with himself. He blamed his lack of experience and understanding of trauma on why it all fell apart, knowing deep down it wasn't his fault, but not being able to see the logical side of it all.

And on top of all of that, the late nights meant he had spent less time at home with his girls. His weekly date nights with Donna had been a challenge, some weeks not even being home in time to even see her before she fell asleep after putting Rose to bed.

It was fucking terrible, and just thinking about it now, months later, he can feel the annoyance rising in him again.

Sighing, Harvey tries to switch his thoughts to something else. He thinks about Louis, and the firm back home in New York, the cases he'd be working on if he were still there… and suddenly it hits him. Home. He still refers to New York as their home, and he supposes, in a way, it always will be.

They've been in Seattle for a little over three years now, but something has felt off lately. He isn't sure if it's been since they brought Rose home, maybe wanting her to be closer to Marcus (who had absolutely loved Rose when he came out to visit three months ago), or maybe now with everything with Sheila and life seeming to change in the blink of an eye… he isn't sure. He just knows there's an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach that seems to ease off when he imagines them raising Rosie back home in the big city.

The only problem with that, though, is that Donna loves it here in Seattle. She's happy, content, and he would never take that away from her.

{**************************}

They make it to New York a few short days later, babies in tow and more luggage than Mike claimed was necessary. But, as Donna explained, they were going to be there for several days, and who knows what the weather would be like or what toys the kids would want to play with.

Mike and Harvey had simply bitten their tongues, allowing Donna to get her way (a smart choice on their part, really).

She's sitting in the living room of her parents' home now in Hartford, watching as they play with Rose. It's their second time seeing her in person; her father had been sick when they'd first gotten home from China, and Donna was worried to bring the baby around him.

After a few trying weeks at work, Donna and Harvey had taken a weekend trip to the east coast, allowing Louis and his family, Marcus and his kids, and her parents all to meet their bundle of joy.

Then, as life often does, they'd all gotten so busy, case after case at the firm taking up more time than they originally planned for, and her parents not being able to find a weekend to fly out, there just hadn't been time for another visit until now.

They'd FaceTimed, of course, Jim and Clara instantly falling in love with Rose just like everyone else had. She'd made it a point to make sure they got to see their granddaughter as much as possible, and now, months later, they're finally here again.

It's crazy to her how quickly these last few months have gone by. She wishes more than anything that she could slow time down, savor every moment with her daughter that they've been given.

She's the most perfect little baby they could have ever asked for — sleeping was a challenge her first few weeks at home, causing Donna and Harvey to be exhausted each day, but once her little body adjusted to the time change and new surroundings, things settled into a new normal that Donna wouldn't change for the world.

"I can't believe how much she's grown!" Clara gushes, kissing Rose's cheeks before tickling her belly.

Rose gurgles and laughs, pushing Clara's hand away, then pulling it back, causing all of the adults to laugh.

"She really has," Harvey states, smiling down at his daughter.

Donna catches his eye, giving him a sweet smile that he returns, and god, she loves this man so much. Even just a simple look from her can calm her down and make her feel as if everything is alright in their world.

She shakes her head, even knowing in her own mind that she sounds like a sap, and she has to try and contain the laughter bubbling up inside of her knowing that her sappy side is all thanks to her husband. Who knew the powerful Harvey Specter was really such a softie behind that tough facade?

Pulling herself from her inner musings, she watches as Jim struggles to get up from the floor, laughing and calling himself old as Donna helps him stand. He plops down into his chair, saying it's not fair that Clara still has good enough joints to stay down there with the baby.

They make small talk, Harvey catching Jim up on things at the new firm (which is weird; she's still not used to them getting along), and Donna joins her mom on the floor, tossing Rose a ball that she wobbles after, bringing it back to Donna with a grunt and a, "Mama!" that makes her heart swell with affection.

She tells her mom that things have been going well at home, and Rose is amazing. They've watched her grow and discover life. They've witnessed her rolling over, crawling, now walkingand attempting to talk. Donna doesn't understand how so much has changed in just a few short months.

"Donna!" Harvey calls from the living room. "Donna, hurry!"

She rushes out from the bedroom, asking Harvey what's wrong. He shushes her, then points to the phone in his hand and down to Rose.

Their baby girl is up on her hands and knees, rocking back and forth like she's been doing for days now, and Harvey whispers (she's not sure why he feels the need to whisper in this moment, but she goes with it), "I think she's going to crawl!"

She smiles, trying not to squash his dreams. Their doctor had told them that babies sometimes rocked like this for weeks on end before actually taking off, and some babies didn't even crawl until closer to nine months. Rose is only six months, only been with them a short two, but she's been progressing in every other area so well that Donna tries to believe this will happen too (plus Harvey's face is just so adorably excited that she hopes it does).

"Come on, baby girl," she coos, motioning for Rose to come to her. "Come to Mama!"

Rose's little grin lights up her face as she lifts one hand in the air toward Donna, her little eyes going wide for a moment when she realizes she can't balance like that. Before she tumbles face first into the rug, she lowers her arm, righting herself again as she rocks and bobs her head excitedly.

Harvey cheers her on, tapping on his leg with one hand while the other holds his phone to record this (possibly) momentous occasion. "Come on," he encourages, "Come to Daddy!"

Donna scoots closer to him, that way Rosie doesn't have to choose which parent to crawl to first, and they both beam when one of Rose's arms wobbly reaches out, then a knee tugs behind. They watch as she does the same with the other side, successfully crawling one tiny step toward them.

"That's it!" Donna cries.

"You did it!" Harvey exclaims simultaneously.

Rose gurgles happily up at them, a string of drool falling from her one and only tooth that just sprouted two weeks ago to the floor beneath her. She makes another move, then another, inching closer and closer to her parents as Donna and Harvey cheer her on.

Donna peers over Harvey's shoulder, making sure Rose is still in frame on the video. "I can't believe she's crawling!"

"She's a genius," Harvey brags, "which of course I expect nothing less of our child."

With a roll of her eyes, she places a kiss to his cheek, scooping Rose up when she makes it over to them, peppering her chubby cheek with congratulatory kisses, praising her for the good work.

Setting her down, Donna encourages Rose to crawl toward her toys in the center of the room. And so for the rest of the night, their time is filled with watching their baby crawl back and forth between toys, them, furniture, and everything else she can now reach independently.

Donna gets a little teary-eyed watching her crawl around the apartment, and Harvey loops his arm over her shoulder, kissing the top of her head, a whispered, "I know," falling between them.

She and Harvey couldn't be happier with their lives here… all except for the fact that Donna is pretty much miserable at work. She doesn't want to tell her mom that, but she suspects her mom can tell when her eyes glance over to Harvey as she listens to him fill Jim in on the most challenging case he's ever worked on.

"How are things going?" Clara murmurs lowly, cuddling Rose to her chest, rocking her back and forth and patting a rhythm to her diapered bottom.

Donna gives her a sad smile, trying to appear like everything is fine. She reaches out for Rose's hand, thumb trailing over her little knuckles. Her daughter looks up, giving her a toothy grin, then launches herself into her arms, causing Donna to snicker.

"Things at home are amazing," she affirms, making sure her mother knows the storm swirling inside of her isn't about Harvey or their little family. Being married to Harvey, and now figuring out this whole parenting thing together, are the biggest joys in her life. "Work has just been tough lately."

"Still?" Clara asks, knowing the last time they came to town, it was to get away from work.

They'd been working on the sexual harassment case around the clock, taking more time and energy than any of the name partners ever planned for. Donna had stayed late, helping as much as possible, but with the smaller firm came less responsibility for the COO in times like these. She essentially became the nanny, taking care of Bobby along with her own daughter each night until Mike, Rachel and Harvey were able to leave the firm. It was daunting to say the least, taking everything out of all of them for weeks on end.

After the disappointing outcome and days of Harvey beating himself up, Donna had decided they needed a break, needed to get out of town and away from their stressors.

They'd packed their bags (oh so many bags now with a baby) and headed to the east coast. Her parents had been dying to meet Rose, unable to travel because of her father's health. Louis and Sheila were also thrilled to get the chance to meet her, and they planned to visit Marcus as well while out there.

It was wonderful and made her not want to come back to Seattle. Having family around was amazing. Rachel and Mike are family, of course, but it was different having Marcus and her parents just a phone call or a few hours away.

When she and Harvey want to go out, they want to go with their best friends, so finding someone they trust to watch Rose is hard. If they lived in New York, they'd always have trusted babysitters on standby...

Lucy also loved Rose, that much was obvious from the moment the little girl laid eyes on the six month old.

"Aunt Don!" the toddler called, running into the entryway. She wraps her little arms around Donna's legs, squeezing tightly.

Donna bends down, picking Lucy up into her arms. She kisses her cheek, telling the curly-haired girl how much she's missed her favorite niece.

They make their way into the living room, Louis lavishing all his attention on Rose. "You are just the most beautiful little thing I've ever seen," he gushes, then looks to Lucy, telling her she is too.

Donna catches Harvey rolling his eyes as he sets the diaper bag down, and she smirks, winking at him when he catches her eye.

Sheila helps Harvey set up a playmat in the middle of the floor, Louis scattering all of Rose's toys out for her to play with. He sets her down, tickling her rounded belly and gushing over her once again.

"I can't believe she's here," he exclaims, smiling over to Donna as she settles onto the couch next to Sheila.

"Me neither," she chuckles, bouncing Lucy on her knee. "We've only had her for, what, two months, but I already feel like I know her so well."

Sheila nods, saying it's mother's instinct to feel bonded with your child in that way.

Donna beams, her heart warming every time someone calls her a mother.

"I'll have to get her another Litt onesie now that she's outgrown the first one!"

Donna snickers, looking over to Harvey. His eyes are wide as he tries to explain away the reason they won't be needing a new one.

Sheila joins in on the laughter, both women making fun of their husbands as Louis looks beyond confused as to why they wouldn't want another piece of that priceless clothing.

Lucy wiggles down off of her lap, joining Louis and Rose on the floor. They play for a while, Louis eventually dragging himself off of the floor and into a chair. All the adults talk, catching each other up on their firms and Sheila's health while the girls play on the floor.

"The doctors are really hopeful," Sheila tells them, smiling. "My latest tests all looked good, and the lymph nodes that were worrying them last time have shrunk."

"That's amazing," Harvey says, nodding toward the blonde woman.

Louis stands then, berating himself for being a terrible host. "Oh my god, I'm the worst. Emily Post would be so ashamed of me if she could see me right now," he rambles, a hand flying to his forehead. "Can I get you guys anything to drink?"

Harvey looks at Donna, mouthing a, "Who?" which makes her smirk but shrug, having no idea either.

"Oh my god. Donna. Harvey," Louis chastises with a scoff, looking at the pair as if they're idiots. "Emily Post. She's the oldest, most well known etiquette coach on the planet," he chuckles derisively, brows furrowing at their obvious stupidity in the subject.

Donna quirks an eyebrow in Harvey's direction, giggling as Harvey just shakes his head.

She gives Louis a placating smile, assuring him that it's fine. "I'll just have some water."

While he's busying himself in the kitchen, Donna watches as Lucy plays with Rose. She's being so gentle with her, and it makes Donna proud. She's such a sweet little girl, gentle and caring with everyone.

"My baby is pretty," she announces in all seriousness, looking to Harvey as she points to Rose.

"Yes," Harvey laughs, "your baby is very pretty."

Lucy gives him a proud little nod, one so reminiscent of Louis when he's practically melting from Harvey's words of affirmation, that it makes Donna laugh.

They spend the rest of the night watching cartoon movies and letting the girls play together - really just Lucy petting Rose's face while she shows her all the different toys, despite them being Rose's that she plays with daily, while Rosie just watches on in fascination - and Donna settles into the sofa, pajamas on, as she muses over how different life is now.

Lucy will be four in a few months, and now that Sheila is gone, everything is turned upside down and inside out.

There's just so much happening in their lives, it's like there's a pull to be back in the big city, and Donna hates it because she knows how much Harvey loves Seattle. She loves it too, but… there's just something missing.

Telling Harvey will be hard though… they've made a life here over the last three and a half years.

She pulls herself from her thoughts, watching as her mom tickles Rose's stomach. Her dad sits in his chair, watching as well. He catches her eye, giving her a quick smile that she returns.

It's only their second time seeing Rose in person, but she can already tell how much her parents love their only grandchild.

"I'm sorry to hear about Louis' wife," Jim says, telling Clara how he'd met the man a handful of times when he'd visited Donna in the city for lunch.

Clara nods, murmuring something about how terrible it all is.

Donna's heart aches, looking to Harvey as she feels her eyes mist over. He's been her lifeline in all of this, letting her cry whenever the emotions hit her, holding her and giving her comforting words.

The funeral was three days ago, but they'd stayed at Louis' house with him and Lucy up until this morning. She didn't want to leave, but she knew she'd never be able to leave her grieving friend.

Louis had been so sad, so uncharacteristically calm and sedated, that she almost didn't recognize him. Harvey had tried to make him smile, even telling him about using his dictaphone tactics while in China.

It'd brought a minuscule smirk to the corner of his mouth, but the only thing that'd been able to make him truly smile was when his toddler climbed into his lap, stroking his cheek before pressing a kiss there, whispering, "Love you, Daddy."

Sighing, Donna agrees, telling her parents about the funeral and how Louis and Lucy were coping. "I think we need to come back soon to check on them."

She glances over at Harvey, hoping he agrees, and like with most things in life, he nods, already on board. Smiling, she gets up from the floor, joining her husband on the couch. She presses her shoulder into his then pulls back, pressing a chaste kiss to his cheek. He pulls her legs into his lap, letting them hang as she leans back, relaxing for a moment before she inevitably needs to get up to help Rose with something (not that she minds, of course, that's motherhood, after all).

After a beat of silence, her dad changes the subject, asking about Rose's upcoming birthday.

"It's not for another two months, Jim," Clara chuckles, but her dad simply shrugs, saying he wants all the details so they can be ready to FaceTime the party if they're unable to fly out there.

She gives him a smile, but part of her is overcome with sadness, all stemming back to those thoughts earlier about wanting to move. Things would be so much easier if they lived on the east coast ‒ they'd be closer to family and her parents wouldn't have to fly every time they wanted to see Rose. She bites her lip, knowing what she truly wants deep down, but not wanting to say anything because she knows how much Harvey loves their life in Seattle.

{**************************}

A month after Sheila's death, things were finally starting to feel normal again. They'd spent a week in New York helping Louis plan the funeral, taking care of Lucy and consoling their friend after his wife was buried before spending the last few days with Donna's family in Connecticut.

It had been hard, but the silver lining was that Rose got to see her grandparents again, which made Donna's parents happy as well. While there, like with each time they visited the east coast, they met up with Marcus. This time, however, he was in the city at his newest restaurant so it was much easier for him to visit.

Now, despite how crazy life has been lately, Harvey was happy to have a night alone with his wife. Their fourth anniversary was coming up in a few months, but with everything going on, he didn't want to wait that long to have date night with her. They'd tried their hardest to keep weekly date nights since bringing Rose home six months ago, but, as with most parents, that was hard some weeks.

"Dada," Rose babbles, a string of other sounds coming out with the title. He isn't sure if she actually knows she's saying mama and dada when she makes those sounds, but she seems to have figured out which sound belongs to which parent, and that's good enough for him. It's crazy to him to think that in a few months, she'll be actually talking and trying to make more sense of these syllables falling from her lips.

"Hey, baby," he coos, cuddling her to his chest. She twists and turns, wiggling her way out of his grasp, and he chuckles, setting her down on the ground. She scurries away, off to the living room where she has brought a pile of toys from her nursery.

He rolls his eyes at the mound, knowing that there was no point in trying to put them all back in her room while she was still here. Rachel and Mike would be there soon to take her for the night, a little slumber party with the Ross' while he and Donna got to have their own slumber party.

Harvey snorts at the thought, catching Donna's attention. She's standing at the kitchen island, packing a bag full of milk and food for Rose to have while gone for the night. "What's so funny?"

Shaking his head, he makes his way over to her, standing behind his wife as he wraps his arms around her waist, drawing her closer. His nose nuzzles into her neck, and she giggles, swatting him away and saying she has to get this packed before Rachel gets there.

Stepping away, he breathes out another laugh, reaching into the pantry to grab a pack of whole grain crackers. "You do know she will just eat whatever Mike and them make tonight, right?" He smiles at the way Donna worries, knowing this is one of the only times Rose has slept away from them. She's eleven months old, already able to eat "human food" as he likes to call it, so he knows she'll be well fed at Mike's house.

"I know," she sighs, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear. The gesture exposes the freckled skin on her neck, and he leans in, quickly pressing a kiss to her collarbone. She laughs, shaking her head at him before saying, "I just know how picky she can get sometimes. I want to make sure she has plenty of milk and her favorite snacks… just in case."

"Alright," he muses, knowing there's no point in arguing that Rachel and Mike keep the same snacks in their house for Bobby.

Rose interrupts them anyway, soaring in on her little walk n' ride toy, a miniature scooter if you will. The wheels and all the plastic gadgets attached to it echo against the hardwood floor as she skids to a stop at his feet, babbling in her baby talk.

"Oh, really?" he asks her, bending down to look at the little ladybug head at the front of the toy. He bops it on the nose, the swirly gizmo attached spinning around, the tiny balls inside of it swishing and filling their kitchen with noise. "You don't say?"

Rose laughs, climbing off of the toy and wobbling over to Donna. "Up!" she squeals, causing his and Donna's faces to light up, proud of these new little words she's been figuring out.

"That's right, Rosie!" Donna praises. "Up!" She lifts their girl into the air, bouncing her on her hip while singing a jingle about the word up.

Harvey smiles watching his two favorite girls play together, then grabs a few cheese sticks from the fridge to toss into the bag. Zipping it up, he pats the top of it, telling Donna that it's finished. She and Rose both peer down at the bag, Donna biting her lip as she seemingly debates internally if she is satisfied with it.

She must decide it's fine, because she carries Rose into the living room, sitting on the ground with her. "Mommy is going to miss you so much tonight," she coos, stripping Rose's pants and shirt off, "Yes, I will!"

Rose watches in fascination as Donna talks to her while changing her diaper, and Harvey joins them on the floor, handing Donna a new outfit. "You packed her pajamas, right?" she asks, taking the dress and bloomers from his hand.

"Yeah," he affirms, nodding toward the diaper bag packed and ready to go on the couch. "I also put three other pairs in there just in case, and four outfits for tomorrow."

Donna laughs, rolling her eyes but thanking him. "A little overkill," she jests with a wink, "but I love it."

Her phone dings, and she tells him that Mike, Rachel and Bobby are on their way over. He nods, kissing Rose on the tip of her tiny button nose when she stands, leaning in close to his face. Her two little hands cup his cheeks and she crosses her eyes, laughing at herself before skittering over to her toys. She babbles, holding up a toy in their direction. She makes noise, as if describing what the toy is, before putting it back down.

Rose picks up her plastic cell phone toy, placing it to her ear.

"Hello?" Harvey asks, pretending to talk on his phone. "Is this Rose?"

The baby giggles, nodding her head as she chatters on in her own way, talking to Harvey on the phone. He chuckles, looking to Donna who laughs along with them.

He loves this. Never thought he would spend his Saturday nights at home pretending to talk on the phone to a baby, but here he is, and he couldn't love it any more. It's the best feeling in the world, having Donna and Rose by his side.

Just then, there's a knock on the door, and Rose drops her phone, toddling over to the door with Donna. He stands, grabbing the bag from the couch and heading into the kitchen.

He greets his friends as they pile in, Bobby bouncing in Mike's arm to see Uncle Harvey. He smiles, taking the little toddler from his dad's arms. He bounces the little guy, asking him if he's ready for his sleepover.

Bobby nods, exclaiming, "Yeah!" before pointing to Rose. "Night night wit' me?"

Harvey chuckles, confirming that yes, Rose was spending the night with them. Their kids are only eight months apart, but it's fascinating to him to see how much Bobby has changed in the year and a half he's been alive. His talking has developed so well, but, of course, boy wonder would produce a kid that talked earlier than most others (as if Harvey needed two Mike's walking and talking around him). He's excited to see the other changes Rosie will go through, though he wants to keep her a baby forever.

"All set?" Rachel asks, taking the food bag from Donna's hands with a raised brow. "You know we have snacks at home, too, right?"

Harvey smirks, bringing a hand up to his mouth to cover the grin, and Donna rolls her eyes. She shrugs, saying she just wanted to be prepared.

Harvey hands Mike the bag of clothes and diapers, telling him about all the extra outfits, "Just in case."

Mike laughs, clapping him on the back, assuring him that they knew what they were doing. "We have done this before, guys," he states, pointing toward Bobby.

Harvey snickers, knowing he's right. He'd be lying, however, if he said he wasn't nervous. Rose has spent the night with Mike and Rachel once before, but it's his baby, he will always worry.

Rachel takes Rose from Donna's arms, peppering her chubby cheeks with kisses. "Oh, I am so excited to have a girl in the house!" she squeals, fluffing Rose's black hair up before Donna slides a headband onto Rose's head. "We can put bows in our hair and play with dolls…"

Donna laughs, nodding and saying that having a girl is great. "Maybe the next Ross baby will be a girl."

Rachel giggles, eyes misting over as she clearly imagines them having a baby girl. "Alright, alright," she announces, waving off the daydream, "let's get going. I'm making Coq au vin tonight!"

Harvey looks to Donna, who looks at him, both silently questioning if Rose will even eat that… whatever that is.

"Relax, guys," Rachel laughs, making a silly face at Rose who babbles back at her, "it's just chicken with some vegetables."

"She just likes to make it sound fancy," Mike quips. He leans into Harvey then, hand raising as if telling a secret as he stage whispers, "But I do have some chicken nuggets in the freezer just in case."

They all laugh, Donna and Harvey kissing Rose goodbye. Donna tears up a bit as the family leaves, and she takes a deep breath as Harvey locks the front door behind them.

"She'll be okay," he promises, despite the pit in his stomach as well. She's been gone all of twenty seconds and he already misses her.

Donna nods, obviously trying to put on a brave face. "Come on," she says, smiling as she takes his hand. "We can make use of our lovely kitchen counter," she purrs, hand trailing across the granite countertop, "now that we don't have a baby at our feet begging for food."

He swiftly grabs the can opener from the nearest drawer, bouncing his eyebrows as he says, "Perhaps we can use this?"

Donna laughs, smacking his chest. "You're an idiot."

He grins, but it soon turns into a coy little grin as she hops up onto the counter, a seductive look in her eye and a flick of her eyebrow. Harvey's Cheshire Cat grin plasters itself on his face as he steps in between her legs, lavishing kisses, sucks and nips to her skin.

Leaning back, her hands reach up, fingers trailing through his hair as he kisses a path down her neck. He pushes her top up to her breasts, and she holds it in place as his tongue works across her skin. She tells him, in no uncertain terms, that she's already slick between the thighs, and fuck, he loves that he can do that to her just from a few well placed kisses. This woman will be the death of him.

"Harvey," she sighs, leaning back on her elbows as she lets the shirt fall. Her ankles wrap around him, drawing him in closer, and he's once again thankful they bought an apartment with a counter made at the perfect height for his body.

He grins at her, that grin that says he knows exactly what he's doing to her, and she groans, lifting her hips up as he shimmies her pants down along with her lacy black thong. "Fuck," he breathes, pressing his lips to hers, nipping at her bottom lip and tugging on it as he pulls away.

Reaching down, he drags his finger across her, dipping in to see if she's wet enough. She nods, flirtatiously letting him know, "No need for that, I'm already ready."

His grin morphs into a goofy, boyish beam, and she laughs, shaking her head at him.

Sitting up, she fiddles with his belt, slinging it off and tossing it somewhere over her head. She hears it hit the floor, but doesn't seem bothered with its location right now. She makes quick work of his zipper, pushing his jeans down his thighs and pulling him in tighter.

Harvey reaches down, rubbing himself before stepping as close as possible. His tip swirls at her clit, teasing her, and she looks as if she will murder him if he doesn't get inside of her, and her ankles slide back up, encouraging him to go for it.

That cocky smirk makes another appearance as Harvey leans up, bussing his lips against hers passionately while his cock sinks into her heat. He goes all the way to the hilt, and mmm, yes, he can tell he's already hitting that spot she loves by the way she hisses his name and thrusts her hips up. God, he loves when she does that, loves when she brings their bodies closer than he thinks should be humanly possible.

Donna shimmies closer to the edge, panting as Harvey thrusts into her over and over again, working her up to the brink, bringing her just to the precipice of her climax but not letting her fall just yet.

She brings her torso up, pressing her chest to his, and he realizes their shirts are still on. The mental image makes him laugh, like a pair of horny teenagers that had the house to themselves. He chuckles, lips lifting from where they were sucking on her pulse point.

Donna pulls back, looking down at him as she inquires, "What's so funny?"

Shaking his head, he promises her that it's nothing. He tells her of his latest thought, and she snorts, leaning back in to kiss him. Harvey's hands lift her shirt off, saying, "But I'm right, of course, I need this off, too," as he tosses the shirt behind him.

Grinning like the cat that got the cream, she slides her hands down his chest, lifting the hem of his shirt to pull it up and off. It joins his belt somewhere in the vicinity of the space between their kitchen and living room, and she bites her lip, admitting that the sight of his bare chest will never grow old to her. And god, she has absolutely no idea how much he feels the same way. He could kiss his way down that freckled, creamy skin of hers every moment of every single day and never tire of it.

"Fuck me, Harvey," she moans when he resumes his thrusts, cock rubbing deliciously against her wetness.

He growls in her ear, biting on the lobe before pulling back. "Tell me what you need."

God, she practically melts at that, and he knows she loves when he talks like that, but he is willing to give her whatever she wants, she just needs to tell him. "My, mmm," she breathes, "my clit."

Not needing to be told again, he squeezes at her thighs, hand trailing up to her. He presses his thumb to her clit, rubbing in circles as his cock pumps in and out of her. And, fuck yeah, that's it right there. That must be what she needed, because she moans, "Mmm," her hands frantically trying to find something to do. She plays with her breasts, flicking at her nipples, but shit, he loves to see her touching herself like that, but he (selfishly) wants to be the one to touch her. He wants to completely pleasure her, so Harvey's mouth soon replaces her hands, tongue swirling against the hardened peaks.

She then wraps her arms around his shoulders, nails scouring his back, and he's positive they leave half moon shapes in his skin, but he can't be bothered by that right now.

Moving her hands back up, they find purchase in his hair, giving it a little tug when he thrusts harder, making her moan out. He loves when she tugs on his hair like that, taking control despite him being practically on top of her on this counter

Their heavy breaths and groans echo throughout the kitchen, and he loves this, loves that their desire for one another hasn't lessened since becoming parents. If anything, it's made them want each other even more, they've just had to get creative (the file room at work proved to be quite an effective place to rendezvous).

His thumb presses more firmly to her clit, giving her just the right amount of pressure to make her close in on that sweet line of falling past the point of oblivion. She cries out, tugging him closer as her legs begin to tremble. "Harder, fuck."

Harvey fucks into her four, five, six more times, and her walls shudder, clenching around his cock as she comes undone, his name on her lips. It feels fucking amazing, and he follows soon after with a few more well placed juts of his hips, the intensity of his orgasm overwhelming him. They slump down together, Harvey leaning on top of her while her back presses into the cool granite countertop, trying to catch their breath.

Panting, they stay there for a moment, Harvey slipping out of her as he softens. Their bodies are covered in a light sheen of sweat, and they giggle like those horny high schoolers from earlier, completely blissed out in the middle of their kitchen.

"Well damn," she giggles breathily, pushing her sweat slicked hair back behind her ears.

He grins, proud of himself for fucking her senseless, and he reaches up, tenderly tucking a strand of her hair back for her. Harvey leans in, pressing his lips to hers, asking if she wants to go shower.

Giving him a coy little grin, she slips from the counter, taking his hand and leading him to the bathroom where round two ensues before they actually clean their bodies.

Half an hour later, they've cleaned up the counter (Donna admonishing him when he tried to start making dinner right where her bare ass had been minutes ago), and are now preparing a lovely dinner together.

Rachel had called soon after their first round, assuring them that they were home safe and the kids were enjoying tearing up the playroom together.

With that, Harvey began cooking them some grilled vegetables to go along with the steaks he'd marinated earlier while Donna made a strawberry pie, winking as she pulled it out of the refrigerator to serve to him.

God, he loves this woman, every single bit of her was so perfectly made for him.

He'd laughed, pulled her into his lap at the kitchen table and fed her a strawberry from the top of it already covered in whipped cream.

They'd flirted, and touched, laughed, and thoroughly enjoyed the night, but there was still something lingering in Harvey's mind. It was the same problem he'd been struggling with bringing up to Donna since the day Sheila died.

Being unhappy.

Not with her, obviously, never with her… but with Seattle.

He'd thought about it multiple times since that day, but everything had been so crazy with taking a last minute trip across the country with two small children and four adults, another tiring case at work that wasn't looking promising, and starting to make plans for Rose's first birthday coming up in a few weeks. Life had just gotten busy, like always, and he could never find the right time to bring up such a heavy subject.

"You alright?" Donna asks, setting their wine glasses and a giant slice of pie down onto the table for them to share. Before she sits, she bends down, picking up some of Rose's stray toys she'd left out earlier and tosses them into the large, round basket they keep in the corner to hide away the string of toys that inevitably end up in the living room each day.

She flops onto the couch, rearranging the silverware she'd brought along with the pie.

He gives her a questioning look as he eyes the dessert, but she simply shrugs, holding up two forks. "It's our anniversary, why not?"

Smirking, he places a lingering kiss to her lips, murmuring, "I love you," as he pulls back.

"I love you too, Harvey," she states, looking into his eyes, "but that still doesn't answer my question." She smirks, sending a knowing look his way, one that says a cute I love you won't get him out of answering what's really wrong.

Huffing, he pushes her red locks behind her ear, turning to face her more directly. "Can I be totally honest?"

Donna sits up a bit straighter, looking almost worried as she nods. "Of course."

"Donna," he starts, his heart racing. He closes her eyes momentarily before opening them back up to look into her hazel orbs. "I'm not… happy."

Her face looks stunned, then alarmed, and he quickly realizes what he said and how it must sound to her.

"Harvey," she scoffs almost in disbelief, "I know things have been a little crazy lately, but–"

"–No! No," he laughs, scooting closer to her. He wraps an arm around her shoulder while her legs drape across his lap. His hand lands on her knee, giving it an affectionate squeeze. "Not like that." He leans in then, pecking his lips to the tip of her nose, causing her to smile in relief.

Her hand comes to rest over her heart as she sighs out. "You scared the shit out of me."

Snorting, he apologizes. "I didn't mean with you, or us. Never."

Nodding, she grows contemplative again, inquiring, "Unhappy with what, then?"

He chews on her lip, before releasing it with a wet pop. "With… this," he sighs, pointing to the view from their large window. "Seattle."

"You're unhappy here?"

Sadly, he nods, not knowing how to feel now that he's let the truth slip free. "I think moving here was the right decision back then," he confesses, "but I don't know if it's the right place for us now."

He watches the emotions cross her face, waits for her to gather her thoughts. Donna looks toward the window, the sun setting low in the sky, before her eyes turn to meet his. He thinks she's going to say she's happy here, that maybe he just needs to win some more cases or something, but what he didn't expect was the smile that brightens her face. "I'm not happy either, Harvey," she sighs. "I was just afraid to admit it because I thought you loved it here."

He chuckles, knowing that was just so typical of them to both be thinking the same thing but not wanting to say it and hurt the other one's feelings.

"Remember when we first came to visit Mike and Rachel?" she asks, giving him a knowing look. "And you found me crying in the shower, completely overwhelmed by all of this?"

He nods, looking at her sadly. He thinks about that night, so long ago now, from time to time. "Yeah…"

"I think, maybe," she grins at him then, shrugging, "that was my Donna senses telling me this wasn't where we are supposed to be."

He nods, admitting, "I haven't been happy for a while." He takes her hand in his, linking their fingers. "I just feel like, I don't know," he huffs, running a hand over his scruff. "Since coming here I feel like our lives are… are cursed or something. The miscarriage, all the lost trials, Sheila dying, goddamit, I don't know," he rambles on, adding, "It's like we weren't meant to have an easy life."

"No, Harvey," she dismisses, shaking her head. She clearly doesn't want him to think of their life so far as a married couple as horrible, she tells him that's certainly not how she sees it. "We've just been through some really tough shit lately, all back to back," she explains, her finger tips trailing through his hair. "But we've also had some really good moments, yeah?" She smiles, tilting her head to get a better look at him.

Sure, some really shitty events have happened over the last few years, but not all of it was bad, he has to remember that.

"You know how when you're in a miserable situation, all you can see is the bad?" she asks softly.

He nods, picking at a piece of the pie before looking back at her.

"I feel like that's where we are," she admits. "We can only see the bad things, but look," she points toward the mantle above their fireplace where a picture of their little family sits, and he beams back at her. "We've made a family here, Harvey. We have Rose now and that's the best thing that could have ever happened to us."

He nods again, this time with a smile knowing that she's right (of course). Seattle hasn't been all bad—He's fallen more and more in love with Donna with each passing day, they've explored a new town together and made some new friends, and they became a family, which is the greatest adventure of their lifetime so far.

"You're right," he concedes. "I just know back home, she's got her only set of grandparents, and Marcus, cousins... Louis and Lucy are there. If you want to stay and try to make it work, I will for you, Donna, but–"

"–Harvey," she chuckles, placing her hand to his jaw and bringing him back to reality. "I haven't been happy either. Let's…" she shrugs sheepishly, "let's go home."

He gives her that boyish grin she always says she loves so damn much as he asks, "So we agree?"

She nods, saying again that she misses New York and wants to go back. "We agree."

Smiling, they lean in at the same time, lips meeting in a tender embrace.

{**************************}

They've agreed. That's a relief, and one she almost laughs at now. She had been so worried to tell him how much she missed New York, but apparently he was in the same boat all along. How typical of them to skirt around their true feelings for longer than need be.

She snorts softly at the thought, rolling her eyes at how ridiculous they are as she continues to kiss her husband.

As they pull apart, worry starts to creep up her spine as she thinks about Rose. "What about Rosie?" she asks, giving him a worried look. "This is her home, all of her little friends at daycare are here," she lists off all the reasons, then asks tentatively, "Am I... a bad mother for wanting to take her away from all of her friends?"

He chuckles softly, patting her knee. "Babe, she's not even a year old yet. I doubt she'll even remember them. We're going to be giving her so much more in New York," he says, adding, "I hate that Marcus and your parents can't be at her first birthday. Not to mention Louis and Lucy, plus Alex, Katrina, Samantha…" He sighs, head falling back against the cushion.

Donna places her hand over his heart, leaning in to kiss his cheek. "You're right. Being here was amazing, we got so much time with Mike, Rachel and Bobby, but–"

"–she's getting so much more back home."

She nods as he takes the exact word out of her mouth, and they share a small smile. He reaches up, taking her hand that rests against his chest and trails his thumb over her wedding band, smiling softly up at her.

"I know," she sighs, "but her party is in a few weeks, so let's not talk seriously about moving until after that. Let me plan the most elaborate first birthday party anyone in this town has ever seen."

"Go out with a bang, eh?"

"Duh!" she exclaims in her best Clueless impersonation (nothing can top his, though), and he smirks in his amused yet smug way, rolling his eyes as he does his best Cher voice as he tries to one up her.

"Like, totally!"

They laugh, and Donna snuggles into his side. They spend the next hour finishing that slice of pie and their wine, hands roaming and lips casually pressing against skin as they both imagine a lifetime of raising their little girl back home where they belong.

Seattle was always supposed to be their first home together, but never their forever. That title would forever belong to the city where they met, where they grew up and grew close. New York would always have their hearts, and now, their family.

The past few years may not have been the easiest, they've gone through one of the biggest heartaches any couple can, but looking at their baby's fuzzy, gray blanket haphazardly tossed onto the chair and the giant puzzle pieces they'd been working on earlier still on the floor, she smiles to herself. Her hazel eyes roam over to the pictures on their mantle, and seeing that bright, toothy grin of their baby girl, she knows no matter where they go and no matter what life throws at them, she and Harvey were always the part of her life that made sense. The two of them, along with their little Rose, were simply meant to be.

END.

{***************************}

There it is! Thank you to all of you who have stuck with this story over the last few months. I know updates weren't quick (sorry about that! And MASSIVE kudos to the girls in this fandom who *can* update their stuff so quickly, I truly envy that skill hahaha #teachmeyourways), but hopefully y'all still enjoyed the ride! :)

Shoutout to Jess, Sarah, Jess, Jane, Blue, Stefanie, Em… everyone who helped with some (or all) of these chapters. You girls are amazing!

An epilogue is also in the works, and I'm super excited about it, so please remember to be on the lookout for it within the next few weeks. Until then, please, please review on here and let me know what you thought of this final chapter!

There's so much madness going around lately with COVID-19, so please stay safe everyone!

Xoxo - Britt

Chapter Text

Epilogue:

The cool September breeze blows through her long, red locks. Donna shivers, pulling her cardigan around herself as she settles at the patio table. Her eyes scan the expanse of the backyard, the Happy 6th Birthday, Lucy banner flapping gently against the house behind her.

She takes a deep breath as she watches Louis join their group at the table, her heart still aching for the loss of Sheila. They've all learned how to grieve and move on with life over the last two years, but it's always on big events — holidays, birthdays, anniversaries — that her death still hits Donna square in the heart.

Harvey reaches over, obviously reading her mind like he's gotten so good at doing. He takes her hand in his, giving her a soft, sympathetic smile when she catches his gaze.

He mouths a, You okay?, and she nods, assuring him she's okay.

She pulls her thoughts away from Sheila as she looks around the table. Their friends are all gathered for Lucy's birthday. Katrina and Samantha are here, laughing together at the group of six year old girls all chasing each other around in glittery unicorn headbands.

Mike and Rachel had flown in, surprising Louis yesterday when they showed up to help decorate for the party.

"Alex is coming later, right?" she asks, looking to Harvey.

He nods his confirmation, informing her that he was having to finish up a brief for the case he'd completed this morning.

Alex had been a nice addition to the Ross & Ross east coast branch, joining Harvey and Donna almost two years ago as they opened up the new firm, collecting clients regularly to add to their roster.

The east coast firm was going just as well as it had in Seattle. They were able to conference call with Mike and Rachel almost daily about work, while running the new firm together: Harvey as a partner and Donna in her rightful place as COO.

It was nice, being back in the city but still working for a smaller firm. They were able to leave work at a decent hour most days, save for the occasional late night (a hazard of the job). All in all, though, Donna was able to pick up Rose from pre-school each afternoon, bringing her to the office to play in the little daycare they'd set up for other employees with small children. Rose would toddle around, helping the daycare worker with the babies and playing with toys the last few hours of the day before the whole Paulsen-Specter clan loaded up and went home for the night.

It was working for them thus far, able to have family dinners almost every night, whether that was one of them cooking or them grabbing take out on the way home from work some nights. Their family dinners were something she had come to love; they were a chance for the three of them to bond and spend some quiet time inside their apartment, away from the hustle and bustle of New York City.

"Mama! Watch!" Rose calls, interrupting Donna's thoughts. The little girl giggles as she tries to mimic the silly dance move Lucy and her friends had just taught her.

Everyone on the porch laughs, Donna smiling at her daughter. "Awesome job, baby!"

The three year old laughs as if the dance was the most hilarious thing ever, head thrown back with wild abandon, before she trots off back toward the birthday girl with Bobby on her heels.

She watches as Rose and Bobby bounce around the yard together, happy to be reunited.

It was nice, she has to agree, having everyone back together again.

"How long are you guys staying?" Harvey asks, standing and walking toward the little table filled with party treats.

He grabs a unicorn plate, placing a cookie for him and a slice of yellow tomato pizza on it for Donna. Louis had ordered from Giano's, getting enough cheese and pepperoni pizzas to feed an army of hungry children, and specifically requesting a personal pan size just for Donna since no one else likes the topping. He also fills a pink solo cup with water, bringing it back over to his seat. He hands her the water and pizza, and she smiles her thanks up to him, pinching off a piece of his chocolate chip cookie and popping it into her mouth with a smirk.

She adjusts her sunglasses as she settles further into her seat, glancing out into the backyard where the children are all running around, laughing and dancing to the music Louis has playing from the speakers on his back porch.

"Just a few days," Rachel says, giving them a sad smile.

Donna gives one right back, knowing her best friend misses having them right down the road. It's been two years since they decided to move, and Donna can honestly say that moving back to New York was the greatest decision they could have made.

Rose has grown so much the last few years, and she and Lucy have become a dynamic little duo that worries Harvey but makes Louis beam with pride. Rose thinks the world of the curly-haired little girl, following her around wherever she goes and trying to copy the things she says.

Donna misses Rachel though, completely, but their weekly FaceTime dates have helped. They've been able to keep each other up to date on what's been going on in their lives, and have planned several trips to visit each other over the years.

"We'll have to go to dinner at Marcus' new place before you leave," Harvey announces, pulling her from her musings.

Mike nods excitedly, stating that he's excited to try it. Marcus had opened up a new restaurant a few blocks from Times Square and it had been a big hit so far. He'd been begging Harvey and Donna to come in and eat for months now, but they just hadn't had the time.

"Daddy!" Bobby calls, garnering the attention of the adults. "Is it time for cake?"

The adults snicker, and Louis stands excitedly, getting the attention of all the children. There are five other little girls from Lucy's class that had been dropped off, Louis assuring their parents that they could stay if they wanted but that there were plenty of adults already if they wanted to go run some errands.

Each parent had happily, and eagerly, agreed to come pick their girls up in a few hours and high tailed it out of there, probably glad to have an afternoon free. She knows she would've taken him up on the offer had she been a random parent friend.

Rose was loving it, though. She already loved Lucy more than anything, and having a handful of other girls Lucy's age was like heaven to Donna's little girl.

"Lucy," Louis calls, waving her over to the back porch, "are you ready to open presents?"

The kids come bounding up to the porch, sweat forming on their brows from all the playing and running around they've been doing.

Louis had, like always, outdone himself. The backyard already had a swingset in it, but he'd also added white fairy lights to hang from the trees, colored streamers wrapped around the trunks (which Donna and Harvey had been in charge of doing last night), and a handful of toys for the kids to play with. There was an area of the yard designated to dolls and their wardrobes, which Rose had immediately zeroed in on, making her way there as soon as they arrived.

It was a unicorn themed party so there was also pin the horn on the unicorn, which they would play later, along with the unicorn headbands the girls had already put on, and little tutus that had rainbow colored tails coming out of them to complete their transformation into little unicorns.

Rose climbs into Harvey's lap, her tutu smushing into the fabric of his jeans and the horn on her head almost poking him in the eye. He closes one eye, leaning away so as not to get taken out by his little unicorn, and twists Rose's body so she can fit comfortably on his lap. She leans back against his chest as Donna hands the little girl her cup of water to drink from, gulping it down as she breathes heavily from her backyard activities.

"Are you having fun, baby?" Harvey asks, kissing her dark hair.

She nods excitedly, telling her mom and dad all about the party as if they weren't sitting right there watching the whole thing. Donna just smiles, though, loving how animated Rose has gotten lately. She'd picked up on talking quite easily, which Donna has to think Bobby was partially responsible for since Rose just copied everything he did back in Seattle, and ever since then she's become more and more talkative. She provided loads of entertainment at dinner each night telling them about her day at pre-school and her friends and everything she was learning as best as she could in her simple toddler sentences.

Louis lets Lucy sit in her special birthday girl chair, which Rachel had decorated with balloons, rainbow streamers, and a little birthday banner with a sparkly unicorn on the front, while Louis brings her presents over to her.

They watch as the six year old excitedly opens her gifts, each one filled with more glitter and rainbows than Donna thinks she's ever seen before. Lucy thanks each of her friends for the new toys and coloring books, getting up to hug each person personally.

"She'll probably send out thank you notes after the party," Harvey jests, "seeing as Louis is raising her."

Trying to suppress her smirk, Donna elbows Harvey in the ribs, shushing him and telling him to pay attention.

While Lucy opens the next few presents, Donna can't help but watch Harvey and Rose. She's still amazed, even after all this time together, how loving of a father he is. He sits there, thumb easily tracing up and down Rose's little arm while her brown eyes grow heavy.

"Someone needs a nap," she whispers to Harvey, head jutting down in the direction of the sleepy toddler.

Harvey grins, nodding. "Maybe she'll sleep well tonight while we're gone."

He gives her a wink, and she smirks, rolling her eyes playfully at him. Being Lucy's birthday, it also means that it is Donna and Harvey's anniversary, a night they refuse to not celebrate each year no matter what.

Ever since moving to New York, Louis had agreed that Rose could spend the night with him and Lucy each birthday so that her parents could celebrate their happy day.

It worked out well so far, the only two they've celebrated here on the east coast, because Rose always enjoyed a slumber party with Lucy. Donna knows that Louis plies them with snack after snack, and probably a few kid-friendly prunies, but she can't bring herself to care too much when she gets a kid free night with her husband, and Rose is always so happy the next day when they pick her up, never wanting to leave Uncle Louis' house.

"Happy anniversary, by the way," he murmurs, leaning over as best he can with Rose in his lap, kissing Donna's cheek. "I love you."

Smiling, she sends the sentiment back to him with a sweetly murmured, "I love you, too." Donna sits back in her chair, watching Lucy open her last gift and taking a deep breath as she rubs her protruding stomach.

"How's she doing in there?" Harvey asks, glancing down at her growing baby bump.

Chuckling, she assures, "She's fine. Just moving around a lot."

"She wants cake," Rose pipes up, grinning at Donna with a little grin on her face. It still amazes her how many mannerisms of her and Harvey's their little girl has picked up. She may not be theirs by blood, but that Cheshire Cat grin was all Harvey.

Donna takes a look over to Louis, making sure he doesn't need any help cutting the cake now that Rose mentioned it. Rachel must see her look, because she nods at Donna, saying she'll help. "Don't get up, Mama!"

Rachel stands happily, taking the ice cream scoop and placing a dollop next to the slices of cake on the small, unicorn birthday plates.

"Maybe she does," she giggles, tickling Rose's little foot. "She'll probably want a second slice, too."

Rosie giggles, perking up as she agrees. She slides off Harvey's lap, then, taking the two steps over to Donna's chair. Her little hand reaches out, rubbing softly against her bump, and Donna's eyes mist over, the hormones racing through her body always making her extra emotional, especially when their little girl loves on the new baby the only way she can right now.

The pregnancy had been a surprise to say the least. She'd been feeling off for a few days, but chalked it up to food poisoning or maybe the flu. It wasn't until a few weeks later, when she realized she hadn't had her period all month that Rachel convinced her to take a test.

Once she saw the two little pink lines, tears instantly flooded her eyes, unable to believe what was happening. As soon as Harvey got home, she'd shown him the test, both wrapping their arms around one another as they cried.

"Holy shit. Is that… are those two lines?" Donna mumbles to herself, hidden away in her bathroom.

Rose beats on the door again, pulling Donna from her swirling thoughts and calling for her. "Mama! Come watch Moana!"

She smiles, knowing how much her daughter loves that movie.

Leaving the pregnancy test on the counter, she walks out, chasing Rose out of the bedroom and down the hall, the little girl squealing the whole time. Her loud cries of elation echo down the hall, and Donna laughs, loving the sound of childhood in their home.

Holy shit. Now there's going to be two kids to fill their home.

She can't believe it. She's terrified, fear consuming her as images of her first pregnancy flash through her mind. After the fear comes shock but also happiness, which don't even begin to explain how she's feeling right now. She wants, no, needs, Harvey to get home soon so she can share the news; it's about to burst from her chest at any moment.

She bites her lip as she settles onto the couch with Rose, the little girl snuggling into her chest as she presses play on the remote.

The movie picks up from where they'd left off, and Rose sings along with Maui as he dances around the beach.

Just then, she hears the keys jingle in the door, and Rose perks up. "Daddy's home!"

She hops off the couch, running toward the door. When it opens, the little girl jumps into Harvey's arms, barely giving him enough time to react.

"Oof," he grunts with a smile, his briefcase falling to the floor at his feet. "Hey, there, baby!"

Donna stands nervously, hands sweaty all of a sudden as she watches him pepper kisses to their little girls' cheeks, making her squirm and giggle in his arms. Harvey bends down, picking up his briefcase and walking into the kitchen. He sets Rose down on the counter, his hand landing on her little knee to make sure she doesn't get any crazy ideas of hopping down in a daredevil stunt.

It's a practiced move at this point, their girl being as adventurous as she is. She'd tried to leap from the counter one good time before they learned their lesson.

While he's preoccupied with that, Donna dashes off to their bathroom, grabbing the rinsed off test and wrapping it up in toilet paper.

When she walks out, she spies Rose on the living room floor, dancing her Moana doll around in the air and trying to mimic the lines of the movie in sync with the television.

She grins, making her way into the kitchen. "Hey, there." She leans in, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips.

"Sorry I couldn't leave with you two earlier," he declares, telling them he was in the middle of a negotiation. He returns the quick kiss, then resumes rinsing off the vegetables she'd pulled out to cook with dinner.

She shrugs it off, telling him it was fine. "All we've done is start dinner and turn on Moana," she chuckles.

She goes silent for a second, watching him work. His sleeves are rolled up, the muscles in his arms flexing and she has the sudden urge to reach out and stroke his arms. They're one of his sexiest features.

Shaking her head, she laughs at herself. She can only imagine what the hormones will do (if this pregnancy lasts, her mind whispers dolefully, that fear creeping inside again), knowing how much she wants her husband on a daily basis already.

Her face, and the way she's slightly bouncing on the balls of her feet, must give away that she has a secret, because Harvey's eyebrows raise, then scrunch, asking, "Why are you so bouncy?"

Giggling, she shakes her head again, unable to really comprehend what she's about to tell him. In an ideal world, she'd come up with some elaborate, Donna-esque way to announce the pregnancy to her other half — a cute onesie like she did all those years ago, a mug that reveals he's going to be a dad, a cute sign for Rosie to hold up proclaiming she's going to be a big sister… something… but the overwhelming onslaught of emotions is too much to keep a secret for any longer.

She glances over her shoulder, confirming that Rose is still thoroughly occupied, before looking back at him.

The knots in her stomach grow, leaving a pit in her belly as she pulls out the wad of toilet paper from where she'd stuffed it in her back pocket. Pulling a layer of it back, she reveals the pregnancy test. "This."

Harvey's breath catches in his throat as he looks down at the item in her hands. He looks confused, but then he looks to her and she nods, a wide smile on her face.

Her eyes mist over as she watches the emotions cross his features. "Donna," he breathes, turning off the water and drying his hands quickly. He takes her in his arms as if she's the most precious gift he's ever been given, asking, "Are you sure?"

She nods into his chest, the test long forgotten on the counter as her arms wrap around his middle. "I have two more to take to make absolutely sure, but… yeah."

Harvey chuckles, the vibrations of his chest making hers do the same. He pulls back, a few tears slipping down his cheeks.

Donna reaches up, wiping the tears from his face as she cries softly, too.

"I can't believe it," he says in wonderment, and all she can do is nod in nervous excitement for this new chapter of their lives that was beginning.

"Me neither."

A beaming smile slowly grows on both of their faces, and Harvey steps closer, wrapping his arms around her waist. Her hands wind around his shoulders, one hand gently trailing through the hair at the back of his head.

Harvey bops his nose to hers, making her own scrunch in response before he presses a kiss to her lips.

They stand there, completely lost in the moment and each other, both seemingly caught up in the feel of the other's lips and the future that lies ahead for them.

Nervous, however, was an understatement at each appointment she went to. She was older now, so she was already considered high risk, especially with one miscarriage in her past. She'd fretted and worried for weeks on end, Harvey finally convincing her to talk to Stan.

Sessions with the older man had been good, great even, and exactly what she needed to calm her nerves and anxiety. Harvey had admitted to being scared as well since none of this was planned and there was always the possibility of another miscarriage happening.

Once Donna hit sixteen weeks, past the point of when they lost their first child, she started to relax a little bit more. At twenty weeks, halfway through, she started to feel more and more confident each day that this little girl was going to make it.

They'd set up a nursery (with Louis' excited help, of course), had a baby shower with their friends and family, and everything else that comes with a pregnancy. Luckily for them, they had kept some baby stuff they'd received at her baby shower for Rose, but with them both assuming they'd never get pregnant again, she'd given most of it away to younger co-workers who were expecting.

It was surreal, knowing that after everything, they'd been gifted another little miracle, but Donna couldn't be any happier with the way things had turned out.

Once the kids have devoured the cake and ice cream, Rose's chubby little cheeks being covered in the dessert, they all run off to play some more in the yard.

"Love you, baby," Rose whispers, kissing Donna's belly and grinning up at her parents before running off to catch up to Bobby.

Harvey scoots his chair closer to hers now that there's room, his arm draping over her shoulders. He presses a kiss into her hair, asking if she needs anything.

Smiling over to him, she shakes her head, telling him that she's fine. "I mean, a back massage never killed anyone, but…" she trails off with her signature grin.

Harvey laughs, reaching over as best he can the way they're sitting and gives her shoulders a little squeeze. "I'll give you a real one tonight," he whispers into her ear, winking as he pulls away.

She bites her lip, her hormones going haywire at the way his hot breath tickled her ear. She presses her lips (and legs) together, containing the moan that wants to escape. Swatting his arm, Donna uses the pretense of scooting her chair closer to the table to slide it over a smidge, giving herself some distance from her hot husband.

"What are you two going to do tonight?" Rachel asks, looking over at the couple.

Donna smiles, thwapping Harvey on the knee as she hears his suggestive chuckle from beside her. The men all laugh, Mike shaking his head as he says he doesn't want to hear about mom and dad having sex, and Donna just rolls her eyes.

"We're going to dinner at Del Posto," she grins, rubbing her belly, already excited for the food. "After that," she shrugs, "I left that up to this guy." She points her thumb in Harvey's direction, and her husband grins that signature Cheshire Cat smile of his.

"You don't have anything planned yet, do you?" Mike asks dryly, giving Harvey a knowing look.

Harvey brushes him off, announcing that he has a wonderful night planned for the two of them.

She smirks when everyone else seems to not believe him, but she knows he does. She'd seen an email from an owner of a small theatre the other day confirming his request for a private showing of The Merchant of Venice while they had a candlelit dinner together.

She assumes Louis helped with the planning due to his sneaky little grin he's trying but failing to hide from across the table, but she knows Louis is a hopeless romantic so he'd be the perfect guy for Harvey to get help from.

She won't ruin the surprise, though, knowing he's been trying so hard to make their last anniversary before becoming parents of two kids extra special.

The adults all talk for a bit more, Alex finally showing up, saying he'd been trying to put together a statement of defense that was due on Monday and couldn't get away. He joins them all at the table, thanking Louis for the drink when he hands him one.

"Are you two going on a babymoon?" Louis asks, eyebrows raising in excitement.

Harvey gives him a confused look, glancing over to Donna. Katrina and Samantha roll their eyes, both taking sips of their (adult) beverages as they all watch Louis gear up for an animated explanation of what a babymoon is.

She giggles, holding up her hand in Louis' direction to let him know she could explain. She tells Harvey that a babymoon is when the parents go on a vacation before the baby comes, could be the beach or a mountain cabin getaway, anything, really. "It's like a honeymoon, but… not."

Harvey chuckles, taking her hand in his. "We can go on one if you want. Just name the place, and I'll book it for us."

He lifts her hand, kissing her knuckles as she blushes. She nods, saying she'll think about it, then looks out to the yard again.

Rose is running around with Bobby, both with wands in their hands. Rose's looks like a fairy wand, while Bobby's looks like a lightsaber that he brought from home. They're pointing them toward each other, one or the other falling over dramatically each time, and Donna laughs, catching Rachel's attention.

The women watch their kids playing, both chuckling at the dramatics of their playtime. "They're something else, aren't they?" Rachel asks, giggling.

"They sure are."

She stands then, needing to move around. This baby is taking up so much room already, she's not exactly sure how she'll make it another two months before giving birth.

Donna walks to the wooden railing of the porch, watching all the kids play.

"You okay?" Harvey asks, walking up behind her.

He places his hand on her lower back, pressing his shoulder against hers.

Nodding, she straightens up, explaining, "Just needed to stretch and give her some wiggle room," while wrapping her arms around his shoulders. The noise of the party seems to fade away as she looks into his brown eyes; she can hear their friends talking behind them together, but it's muffled as she focuses on her husband. "I love you, you know that?"

Harvey smiles, eyes growing soft as he looks down at her. "I know," he whispers, tapping the end of her nose. "And I love you, too."

She rests her head on his chest, Harvey slowly swaying them back and forth. She turns in his embrace then, his front pressed to her back as they both watch Rose run around the yard.

The little girl stops for a second, beaming over to her parents and waving before running off to join Bobby and Lucy.

Smiling, Donna looks back over her shoulder to Harvey. "Can you believe this is our life?"

Laughing, his head tilts back a bit before he looks down at her. "Not at all." He smiles, adding, "But I wouldn't change it for anything."

She nods in agreement, pecking a kiss to the side of his lips.

He moves his hands from around her belly to her shoulders, turning her around in his hold. Harvey presses his lips to hers tenderly, head tilting slightly. Pulling back, he sighs, looking into her eyes. She can visibly see the love he has for her shining in his, and she loves this, loves him. He's such a softie when it's just the two of them, and she watches as he looks off into the distance thoughtfully. His head slightly shakes as he brings his chocolate brown orbs back to meet her hazels. "Everything worked out like it was supposed to."

His hand reaches down then, landing softly on her bump between their bodies.

"It sure did."

Smiling sweetly at one another, they both lean in simultaneously, lips meeting more deeply. Harvey's head slants to the side, and Donna's lips part, letting his tongue slip inside. Before it can get too heated, her pregnancy hormones adding fuel to the fire even in just a simple kiss, someone throws a plastic fork at them as Samantha yells a teasing, "Get a room!"

They pull apart, laughing, as Harvey leans in just for her to hear, murmuring, "Didn't exactly need a room to make this one, that we know of," rubbing circles on her bump as their little girl kicks her hello to her father. Her eyes widen as she looks over his shoulder at the other adults, flashes of all their many nights on the kitchen counter, the couch, the shower, and all the times they joked about not knowing exactly where or when this baby was conceived fly through her mind.

She bites her lip, stepping out of his hold to face the patio table everyone else is congregated around and tells him lowly, "You're an idiot," with a sultry chuckle, the images of their bodies joining together making her grow needy. Goddamn it.

As they make their way back to their chairs hand in hand, joining the rest of the gang to watch their children play, Donna smiles to herself, knowing this is never the life she imagined for herself, but always the one she dreamed of.

Rose and Bobby run up onto the porch then, each plopping down into their mother's laps.

Donna grabs the water from the table, handing it to Rose. She swallows it down quickly, a tiny hand reaching up to push the matted, black hair from her forehead. "Why don't you stay here for a bit and cool off, hm?"

The little girl nods, panting as she leans against Donna as best she can with the growing bump in between them.

Donna wraps her arms around Rose's belly, pressing a kiss into her hair as she whispers to her daughter how much she loves her. She inhales slightly, the baby shampoo smell still there from this morning, yet mixed with the aroma of grass and outdoors.

Rosie reaches a hand back behind her, cupping Donna's cheek then trailing down to tangle in a long, thick lock of hair. Her little finger twirls around the tendrel, an action she's done since she was a baby, and Donna's heart flutters with the love she feels for her child.

She glances around the table, laughing softly as she watches the rest of her friends crack up at something Alex had just said.

It was nice, seeing everyone so settled in their lives now and happy. Truly happy. That was honestly the only way she could describe it, and it brought her an immeasurable amount of joy to see all of her friends, her family, really, so content.

Catching Harvey's gaze, she gives him a loving smile. He reaches over, left hand taking hers and resting it back against Rose's stomach. The metal of his wedding ring presses cooly against her skin, and she smiles, totally at peace with the life they've created for themselves.

She presses another kiss to Rosie's head, pretending to nibble her ear which makes the little girl giggle. "Mama, stop!" she chokes out, squirming against the tiny space left in Donna's lap.

"Okay, okay," she murmurs, not wanting their little moment to interrupt everyone's discussion.

She looks to Harvey once more and butterflies swarm in her stomach just looking at him. This little life they've built over the last few years may not be everyone's idea of perfect, but it was for them. She was completely happy with Harvey and Rose by her side, and she was excited to see what the future held for them. Her family.

{***********************}

There we have it. Hope you enjoyed…. Please review!