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three years isn't enough; (stay with me forever)

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it was morning, the sun barely peeking into the windows and pouring light onto their faces when jisoo asked lisa, "three years, did you ever think you'd make it?"

 

lisa was bleary-eyed, almost as badly as jisoo herself, stumbling into their kitchen and rubbing at her face with balled fists. it was early, far more so than was normal for the duo but they had some intense schedules planned throughout the day of the third anniversary of their debut, and the oldest and youngest members had lost rock, paper, scissors, hence why they were awake before their counterparts and at hell-o-clock in the morning for the losing hair and makeup shift. lisa smiled as she grabbed her customary box of cereal and set it down on the table next to jisoo's coffee. breakfast in particular, of all the meals at the blackpink dorm was by far the most diverse, often including a strange mixture of western, korean and occasionally thai foods seen only by budding rays close to dawn (or the noonday sun, depending on their schedules). jisoo's more traditional soup was soon joined by lisa's milk and cereal (which, is or isn't also considered a soup, depending on which member of the group you ask and how in the mood for trouble they are).

 

as lisa slid next to the oldest member, a somewhat delayed but nonetheless enthusiastic reply came in the form of a fruit loop-filled, "hell yeah!" matching the shit-eating grin splitting her face, causing a less intense but no less passionate smile to cross jisoo's face too.

 

she obviously agreed, anyone with operational eyes would.

 

 lisa's dancing skills had always blown her away and there was no doubt in jisoo's mind that her debut was inevitable. not just that though, but her commitment to learning had always inspired jisoo, her willingness to always grasp a new concept or vocabulary term, even if it was a prank from her members was always a reminder for the rest of the girls to press their noses to the grindstone ever the more.

 

they finished their breakfast quietly, as not to wake the others up until they had finished the dishes, at which point lisa decided to toss her oldest member over her shoulder, spin around repeatedly and run screaming into their members rooms as an alarm clock.

 

three years and they hadn't really changed all that much, they're still making each other laugh.

 

[ - ]

 

it was afternoon, directly after they finished filming their anniversary vlive when jisoo asked chaeyoung, "three years, did you ever think you'd make it?"

 

chaeyoung was in odd mix of close-to-tears and smiling larger than life as she pulled the mic pack from her waist and the chord from under her shirt and handed to one of the waiting staff members, bowing politely as she accepted the tissues from a manager and dabbed under her eyes. lisa was off giving something to another manager while the other three crowded around a computer and monitored their live stream, receiving feedback on what they should and shouldn't have done (as if they didn't already know after three years of the same things).

 

chaeyoung had smiled softly, in that uniquely chaeyoung way, with sparkles in her kind eyes and pink dusting her fluffy cheeks as she bashfully shook her head.

 

it's no secret that chaeyoung is probably the shyest member, especially in regards to compliments directed towards her. she gives them out almost continuously, tripping over her own words as they cascade out of her mouth in droves but she blushes at the slightest recount of her talents and denies the truth of her beauty constantly.

 

but more so than that, it's her overwhelming talent that makes jisoo completely disagree with her reaction. chaeyoung's voice would probably qualify as the eight wonder of the world if they were still making that list, capable of emoting so much in a single note, of bending and twisting to reach a frequency that could touch anyone. her skill on the piano and guitar would leave many to shame but also, her raw determination, her insistence on gaining a spot in the debut group as soon as she arrived in korea and her fight to stay there had assured them all as much.

 

jisoo smiled softly (because, somewhere deep down, behind all the self-deprecation, chaeyoung does know that she's just as talented as they all know she is but jisoo's glad that jennie, herself and especially lisa are around to constantly remind her) and pulls her into a tight hug. chaeyoung just rolled her eyes a bit but accepted it all the same and pressed a chaste kiss to the top of jisoo's head.

 

it had started off as a kind of joke, chaeyoung kissing the top of her head after jisoo teased her yet again for being a grandma and never leaving the dorm but since then, it had become a sort of instinct (and far more convenient than the other way around, firstly because jisoo's not big on pda and also because she's almost half a foot shorter than chaeyoung). they've both got huge protective instincts, especially of their members, which most assuredly includes each other, but jisoo's always felt the need to take care of everyone else. but one simple action and that all flies out the window, and she, for a tiny second, internally, revels in the action.

 

but no one else can know that, so jisoo pulls a face, scrunching her nose together and pretending to shake out of the tight grasp. as soon as chaeyoung actually let go though, a pair of smaller hands pull the arms around herself again, jisoo grinning slightly at the loud laugh from behind her, replacing the tears from earlier.

 

three years and they hadn't really changed all that much, they're still protecting each other to the last breath.

 

[ - ]

 

it was evening, with light hands tracing across her bare stomach when jisoo asked jennie, the owner of the dancing fingers, "three years, did you ever think you'd make it?"

 

they were cuddled in jisoo's bed, which probably counted as their bed at this point, given how often jennie slept in it. kuma sleeps at its foot naturally as well, so there's really no denying it at this point. jennie just side-eyes jisoo at the question, her focus barely lifting from the patterns she had been drawing all over jisoo's abs.

 

"maybe," she muses, tilting her head to the side to look into jisoo's eyes. "at some points i was completely sure of my debut and during others, i was sure i was going home."

 

jisoo just grabs her hand and laces their fingers together, lifting her own hand to tuck a piece of hair behind jennie's ear. the electric sensation that came with their connection had always been a comfort, something that she'd always felt. it always made those ridiculous notions that they were one soul in two bodies seem slightly less idiotic. "for the record," jisoo started as jennie cocked an eyebrow, "i always knew you were going to make it.

 

she wasn't lying. 

 

something they always pushed as trainees was 'x factor' or 'charisma'. it was the stage presence that defined yg artists, and it was, according to the asshole no-longer-officially-in-charge himself, something you could develop over time but were either born with or not.

 

jisoo, from the first time that she saw jennie perform, knew that she had it , and that because of that, she was going to make it. jennie had more than proved her longevity in the system but also her kindness to every incoming trainee. as one of the longest lasting, she could have shut everyone out, offered no help and never be questioned for it. but she welcomed everyone with kind words and open arms, making sure their first, most difficult days went as smoothly as possible. she was bound to make an amazing idol, and an extremely attractive one at that.

 

that charismatic jennie was one of jisoo's favorites, a sexy untouchable goddess that could probably make strangers fall at her feet if she asked (not that she ever would). but the shy jendeukie in front of her right now would have to be her favorite of all time, chubby cheeks flushed red with embarrassment.

 

jisoo reached forward to press a soft kiss to her lips, smiling into it in a way that would have been awkward if she wasn't so damn happy.

 

three years and they hadn't really changed all that much, they're still loving each other, every last piece.

 

[ - ]

 

it was almost midnight, the clock on her bedside table reading 11: (something covered by jennie's shoulder) when jisoo asked herself, "three years, did you ever think you'd make it?"

 

it was a question she'd considered often, usually accompanied by adjoining doubts of self-worth that her members would always try to get rid of. lisa would try to hype her up, chaeyoung, to compliment her away and jennie to convince her otherwise but that never stopped the thoughts from occurring.

 

jisoo knew she was pretty, not in a narcissistic sense but from a completely unbiased perspective, her face was exceedingly photogenic, extremely symmetrical and utterly, objectively attractive. people had commented on it for as long as she could remember and many more had expected her to become an actress. with visuals like hers, they had said, it didn't even matter if she could act or not.

 

but that wasn't was she had wanted. she had wanted to sing and dance, and to do it her way. with visuals like hers, they had said, sm would hire her on the instant, regardless of if she could sing or not.

 

but that wasn't was she had wanted either. she had wanted yg and she was willing to work her ass off for it, to stick her neck on the line for it, to pull some incredibly stupid shit for it. in fact, she had gotten into yg with a ballad with absolutely no history of dance experience, stated that an sm artist was her favorite of all time and refused to answer questions from yg himself about whether a ring she had been wearing was an indicator of her romantic status.

 

she had pulled every dumb stunt that was probably possible and yet still got in.

 

no dancing experience had been a pain in the ass but she pushed through it, came in late at night and impressed everyone. she improved her vocals, her dancing, her stability, her maturity and even her visuals (although, that was mostly just genes and ageing) and proved to everyone that she was more than 'good enough to pass', she was not just amazing enough to play, she was stubborn enough to win.

 

she had stood up to yg from the instant she met him, and did things as much on her terms as she could ever since then, defying the many constraints of the world she worked in.

 

maybe she really was always going to make it, with an attitude and determination like that.

 

"go to sleep," a mutter came from the head buried into her neck.

 

"what?"

 

"your thoughts are loud," jennie mumbled. "less thinky, more sleepy," she whispered as the hands around her waist held her tighter.

 

jisoo's question came back to mind. regardless, of if they thought they'd make it, they did. they had battled internet trolls, music critics, incompetent management and even themselves at times and reached their three year anniversary.

 

three years of heaven and hell, goods and bads, highs and lows.

 

they had defied the odds and made it, and no one could ever take that away from them.

 

three years and they hadn't really changed all that much, jisoo's still fighting for her members, and for herself.

 

but maybe she's ready to take herself off that list of people she's been fighting.



"you know, our dating ban's officially over..."

 

"we've been together since before we debuted. now sleep, jisoo."

 

"i love you too."