Chapter 1: Routine (JJ)
Chapter One: Routine (JJ's POV)
JJ kept to himself. He didn't speak unless spoken to, and then it's usually as short and to the point as he could manage, depending on the situation. He didn't mingle due to his inexperience, and he never overstepped where he wasn't wanted, for fear of being a bother. He especially avoided girls his own age altogether for a simple reason: he understood them even less then he understood people in general… and unexplainable things just caused JJ to mentally sweat, so he avoided them.
JJ liked routine and often counted on things going according to his plan. God forbid if they didn't! The halls were usually empty during this time of day and JJ was counting on that; he really didn't want to get caught doing what he was about to do. He slid pass the abandoned classroom to the side hallway near the east entrance. Freedom was close and JJ could practically smell it as he ran toward the steel door. JJ barely made it before 5th bell rang. JJ sighed with relief before he nearly jumping out of his skin.
"Gay J! You fucking came!" a familiar voice screamed.
"Fucking hell, Cook! You scared the shit out of me!" JJ spoke after he was sure he wasn't going to have a heart attack.
"Sorry, Gay J. I'm just happy you made it!" Cook laughed. "You usually flake out on me." He smiled and pulled JJ into a bear hug.
JJ had to mentally remind himself not to flinch at the unexpected touch. "Who else is coming?" JJ asked, once Cook let go of him.
"Naomi and the Fredster," Cook shrugged happily.
"How the hell you get them to agree?" JJ asked.
"Well, Naomi was easy. All I had to say was booze and girls. She was practically foaming at the mouth and Freddie was a little harder, but the promise of endless drugs was too overwhelming for the man." JJ laughed along with Cook.
Cook became JJ's best mate in middle school after they became science partners, and even though the friendship was unexpected and Cook sometimes annoyed the hell out of JJ, he loved him and he knew Cook loved him too.
JJ became mates with Naomi and Freddie last year during their first year of 6th form. Freddie was easier to get along, with since he was extremely laid back and calm. The boy smoked a lot of weed. This, in turn, kept JJ calm when Cook's escapades got them in trouble.
But Naomi was something else! Naomi was just as wild as Cook, if not more so. She loved the drugs and alcohol, but she loved girls even more. Women were the one thing that Cook and Naomi shared together… sometimes literally! Any chance either of them could get to party, they took it. Didn't no matter how shitty the area or party and somehow made it about themselves and their needs. But JJ could give them one thing: they always made a shitty party legendary.
That wasn't why it took Naomi a little longer to get in JJ's good graces and for him to consider her a true mate. It was because she was incredibly cynical and rude to everyone and that just wasn't JJ's cup of tea. But she ended up proving she actually had a soft spot for him the night she stopped making out with a hot girl from the university to keep him company when Cook ditched him to make out with some blonde bimbo with huge tits and an even bigger smile if that was even humanly possible. JJ hadn't thought the blonde was particularly nice or attractive… well, at least not to JJ anyway. When JJ asked why Naomi ditched her date and was being nice to him, she simply gave him a confused look and said, "You're Cook's best mate… and since Cook's my mate too, that makes you my mate as well." Naomi and JJ stayed silent for the rest of the night, not feeling the need to break the comfortable silence that descended upon them because in it they truly became mates. JJ never questioned Naomi's friendship again and Naomi never felt the need to solidify it; they were mates plain and simple.
"Why are they not here yet?" JJ was becoming fidgety. They still had a high risk of being caught in the window between 5th bell and the beginning of 6th.
"I don't know, mate. Chill. They'll be here," Cook said. JJ's nervousness was killing his high from anticipating the party they were soon going to.
"Don't tell me to chill, Cook! They said they'd be here, they should be here!" JJ's nervousness was turning into anger and that wasn't good because no one wanted JJ to be angry. It was then, almost like magic, that Naomi and Freddie decided to make their appearance. Freddie was doing some type of James bond shit that looked neither suave nor becoming on him. It just looked well extremely stupid. To make things worse, he was even singing the damn theme song! Naomi just look really bored and annoyed.
Once Freddie decided to cut out the stupid crap after Naomi's foot "accidently" almost kicked his groin, JJ asked, "What the hell took you guys so long?"
JJ was on the border between annoyed and angry. I don't even want to be here! He thought angrily.
Naomi simple rolled her eyes at his question. "Freddie decided he wanted to be a damn ass for fifteen minutes with that James Bond shit and we almost got caught! We had to hide in an empty classroom for a few seconds before we could leave."
"Yeah, mate. It was freaky! We had to lock ourselves in this closet filled with animal parts and shit. Smelled real bad…" Freddie and Cook nearly busted a gut at that and JJ and Naomi simply exchanged a look and waited.
"Cook, mate, where we going anyway?" Naomi decided that Cook and Freddie would go on forever if left to their own devices and knew she was going have to get the ball rolling if they were ever going to get anywhere. Cook stopped laughing and gave Naomi his full attention.
"Well, children, why… the greatest party of the year!" Cook screamed.
"Wanna scream a little louder, Cook? I don't think the state sector heard ya!" Naomi said with the same annoyed look JJ was sure he had on his own face.
"Who's throwing it?" Freddie asked.
"Why… the Fitches! Who else?" Cook gave them an incredulous look but JJ chose to ignore that. He was too busy with the name that just popped out of Cook's mouth.
Twin sisters, Emily and Katie Finch belonged to the most popular clique at Roundview, called The Beauties. The Beauties were known for three things: Their beauty (obviously), their promiscuous behavior (they pretty much slept with anyone that caught their eye), and their legendary parties. They really did put Naomi's and Cook's to shame. It was an honor to be invited to their parties since they were both exclusive and secret.
"Goddamn it, Cook!" Naomi yelled, "Why didn't you tell me it was a godforsaken Fitch party?" Naomi looked more than pissed; she looked downright, well… livid.
"Because I knew you wouldn't come," Cook said with a cheeky grin. It was a known fact around Roundview that Naomi despised Emily Fitch. No one knew exactly why, but JJ's guess was that it had something to do with sex. It always did with Naomi, plus Emily was the only lesbian member of the Beauties. Emily and Naomi always had these intense competitions going on. It could be about anything… from who could eat the most chili peppers to who could stare at each other the longest. Emily always won and that just pissed off Naomi even more than their baser problem…whatever that was. Naomi hated to lose at anything.
JJ's problem with the Beauties had nothing to do with Emily. In fact, he quite liked Emily; she was nice enough and always said hi to him in the halls. It was the other Fitch that had JJ in a cold sweat. Katie Fitch had become the personification of JJ's idea of hell. Katie was going to be the death of him… and he believed that almost quite literally. Katie wasn't only the devil in JJ's eyes, but the other kind you only fantasized about when those slutty girls at Halloween wore those damn sexy devil outfits at Halloween. Only Katie's wasn't a costume and she was a slutty devil 24/7. Like all the other guys, JJ wasn't immune to fantasizing about her or her sultry demeanor.
"How did you get invited to that?" JJ asked Cook. JJ needed a distraction from his own thoughts about that certain devil.
"I'm fucking Effy." Effy was another member of the Beauties. Actually, she was the leader. Not only did she rule Roundview, but she decided who was cool enough to get invited to their parties.
"How did you get us invited? We ain't exactly 'cool' by their standards." Freddie was right; we weren't outcasts, but we weren't most popular table at the cafeteria 'cool' either.
"Oh, I threatened to withhold sex if she didn't invite you guys and, surprisingly, it worked. Princess loves her wily waggles with the Cookie monster." Cook laughed loudly and started making doggy-style gestures with his hands.
"I don't know what's more surprising… that you of all people threatened to withhold or that you're fucking Effy Stonem," Naomi stated with a roll of her eyes.
Freddie laughed and JJ didn't quite know how to react to that.
"Fuck off; you know if you weren't a muff monkey you'd fuck me too," Cook said in an insulted tone.
"When hell freezes over," Naomi said, simply taking a drag of her cigarette.
"Whatever," Cook answered back.
"Is the party now or something?" JJ was clearly annoyed as he thought, This was getting us nowhere. "Was that why you dragged me out of class to go to this party?"
"Hell no! The party don't start till midnight!" Cook exclaimed.
"What!?" JJ tried to keep his boiling anger in check. "What'd you just say?"
"Party don't start till midnight, Gay J," Cook didn't even know he was walking into a danger zone.
"That's just great!" JJ yelled, his anger finally spilling over. "You pulled me out of class for something that doesn't start until fucking midnight?" JJ only got locked on when he was aggravated or angry and now he was a bit of both…a bad combination. There was a reason that JJ needed routine. It was the only thing that kept him sane and kept him from getting locked on.
"Calm down, JJ, man. It's all cool. We can change and hang at Keith's until it's time." Freddie's attempt to defuse the situation only made him angrier.
"It's your mum, isn't it, mate?" Naomi asked softly.
JJ simply nodded his head, it always was JJ's mom. Barbra Jones was the epitome of a ball buster. She was the main reason his father left and the reason that, once JJ graduated, he was moving as far away as possible and never returning.
"Isn't she out of town this month?" Cook asked.
JJ nodded his head again.
"That's good. Roundview will call about you skipping school while she's away and you can delete the message when you get home. She'll never know," Freddie said with a smile.
That made sense. While Barbara Jones might care about his education, she didn't care enough to actually go to the school if they called again after he deleted the main message. She never did. She was a goddamn walking contradiction.
"Okay." JJ was more himself now. "I'll be okay. Just talk about something else." JJ began breathing in and out, trying to get his breathing under control.
"One thing JJ said made sense. Why'd you drag us out of class if the party doesn't start 'till later?" Freddie asked.
"I wanted to hang with my mates." Cook had an innocent puppy dog look on his face. "Besides, Effy wants to meet us at Keith's."
"You got to kidding me!" Naomi exclaimed. "You want us to meet her so she can sum us up and judge us with 'I'm better then you look.'"
JJ agreed with that.
"Come on; she ain't like that. She's really cool," Cook said defensively.
"Only because she's sucking your dick. For the rest of us, she's a bitch," Naomi said.
Freddie laughed again at that. Cook looked angry, but JJ was still a bit lost.
"Fuck this! Want to go back to my place?" Cook asked curtly. "I've got this killer new weed!" Cook was jumping up and down at the thought of it. The thing JJ loved most about Cook was that he was never down for long. It truly was infectious and JJ needed that in his life.
Chapter 2: Emily Fucking Fitch! (Naomi)
Chapter Two: Emily Fucking Fitch! (Naomi’s POV)
“This looks fucking stupid!” Naomi exclaimed. “I may be a dyke but I’m no fucking lumberjack!” Naomi fumed. She couldn’t believe Cook. The nerve the boy has sometimes! She spat.
“What’s the fucking difference, Naomikins?” Cook chuckled passing the spiff on over to Freddie who laughed loudly at that. JJ just stood there finding this as funny as Naomi. God love that boy! Naomi though, At least I have one friend and for that Naomi was thankful.
Naomi still couldn’t believe Cook had somehow talked her into still going to this party! While Naomi couldn’t believe it, in all truth it wasn’t that surprising. Naomi loved a good party, even if a goddamn Fitch was throwing the fucking thing. God, she hated those fucking Fitches— especially Emily. Bitch! At least Katie put it all out there. She was a fucking cunt and everybody fucking knew it, but Emily (that sneaky cow!) was a whole different story! She pretended to be sweet as pie (which she actually tasted like, but I digress). In reality, she was even worse than her slutty sister. Emily was an even bigger player than Naomi and Naomi didn’t think that was even possible, but the main thing that bothered Naomi about Emily was that she always beat Naomi at everything and she meant everything! Even at fucking women she was better, and not even Cook was better than Naomi when it came to that. Shifty Whore! But Naomi couldn’t seem to remind herself of that because no matter how mad Emily made her, or how much of a fucking liar the bitch was, Naomi still wanted her! Always… and all the fucking time, no matter where or what was happening, she always wanted to fuck her and usually did.
“Give me that!” Cook said, still laughing.
Naomi throw it at him. Hopefully that joint will fucking burn it, Naomi thought.
“Fucking hell!” Cook glared at her.
“Come on, Naomi, it’s not that bad,” Freddie chimed in. “After the party, we might be able to sing folk songs around the camp fire.” That got Freddie and Cook going again and JJ and Naomi just rolled their eyes.
Naomi met Freddie, Cook, and JJ during the first year of 6th form and they were the best mates she had well … ever had. Naomi didn’t have many friends before her boys came along. She was kind of a loner, reading her political books, protesting injustice, and, well, trying desperately to deny her sexuality. But Naomi couldn’t deny it when she first saw Emily; the girl was just so fucking beautiful with her fiery red hair and husky voice. She was in love and she knew it. She hadn’t started hating Emily just yet, but those feelings scared her. She didn’t even know the girl and she was certain Emily was the one girl that could actually break her. Naomi had been so far in denial and fear that she attempted to try and sleep with Cook (Eww!) That only proved she liked pussy. Cook understood (surprisingly) and they instead became great mates instead, and in return, she was taught how to be the womanizer she was today. It helped with her feelings for Emily at the time anyway.
Freddie came next and the main reason they started off as friends was…well… drugs. Naomi and Freddie loved to smoke and they would smoke anything! Whatever got them high the fastest or the longest, but Freddie ended up proving to be an awesome mate when, one day last year, he just let her cry on his shoulder when her mother had been diagnosed with breast cancer a year ago. She had cried and he had listened and talked about his own mother’s death and how that affected him. From that day on, she and Freddie were more than just drug buddies.
JJ came last in Naomi’s list of friends. Even thought he came along with her friendship with Cook, JJ was a little harder to consider a friend, due mainly to the fact the boy barely said more than a few words at a time and the rest of the time he was just silent. He just stared at you almost like he was seeing right through you. That was what freaked Naomi the most about him. Naomi believed if JJ could truly see her for what she believed she was, then he probably wouldn’t like her so much. That made Naomi instantly go into defensive mood, so she started being mean around and to JJ. She wasn’t proud of it, but she thought that if hurt JJ first then he wouldn’t hurt her with his judgments.
It wasn’t until Cook had dragged us to this party in a shitty part of Bristol that JJ and Naomi truly became mates. The party had been unbelievably shitty, but the pickings of hot girls had not been and this hot thing from a nearby university had started definitely sending her ‘fuck me’ vibes and made it even better. That was until she saw JJ standing alone at an unknown party in an unknown part of town. Naomi decided to ditch the hot chick and hang with JJ. It wasn’t like JJ could just leave by himself. He hadn’t known how to drive yet and she was sure that, by the end of the night, all but JJ would be wasted off their ass, so she decide to put her partying ways to rest for the night and keep JJ company. The shocked look on JJ’s face had confused her. She may not have liked him, but she cared about Cook and so, in turn, cared for JJ. It wasn’t until JJ had asked why she was hanging with him that she realized she truly believed him to be a mate and told him as much. So, and from that day on, she and JJ saw each other in a new light that allowed them to be mates and, right now, her best mate at that.
“Fuck sakes! Grow up, you two!” Naomi spat while grabbing the shirt back from Cook. “And actually help me find something decent to wear to this godforsaken thing.” She threw the ugliest shirt she’d ever seen in the back of her closet. One of her one night stands must have left it here and Naomi was guessing she must have been pretty drunk if she fucked whoever this girl was with a horrendous shirt like that.
“Were not fucking chicks, Naomi! Just pick something. We have to meet Effy in an hour.”
Naomi literally cringed at that. That was why she was taking her so long in the first place she didn’t want to meet Effy fucking Stonem. That chick was even more of a mind reader than JJ. She was so fucking observant that she knew Naomi liked Emily before she even realized it. She was the main reason Naomi hated Emily now. Effy had been the one to introduce them to each other at the party where they had first slept together. It actually made Naomi feel better about the fucked up situation she had with Emily to blame it all on Effy. That was what Naomi was going to do from now on when things went in the shitter in Naomi’s life. Blame Effy… even if the bitch had nothing to do with the situation. Yeah, that sounded reasonable. “The bitch can wait.”
Cook groaned and JJ chuckled. She knew JJ hated Effy just as much, if not a little more. Effy was the reason Katie was making the poor lad’s life miserable.
“Shut up, JJ!” Cook exclaimed. “I don’t know why you all hate Effy so much, but get over your fucking selves! She’s the reason you’re all getting to go to the best party of your shitty lives!” Everybody just stared at Cook with wide mouths and bug eyes. Cook almost never exploded like that and not twice in one day!
Wow, Cook must have boner about her if he’s willing to defend the witch. Naomi shrugged her shoulders. Cook can have the girl. More power to him, Naomi thought.
“Sorry, mate, didn’t mean anything by it! Didn’t know you had like a real thing for her. We cool?” Naomi held her arms out, ready for the hug that she knew was coming. Cook glared at her for a few moments before he relented and pulled her into his infamous bear hug.
“I’m sorry, too, my favorite muff monkey. You feel the love, yea?” Cook hugged her a little longer before setting her on the floor.
“Yeah, I’m sorry too,” JJ said.
“We’re all cool?” Freddie asked.
“We’re cool.” Cook said. Everybody sat in stunned silence for what seemed to Naomi like forever. It didn’t surprise Naomi that it was Freddie who broke it.
“So… you like Effy?” Freddie joked and immediately the mood was lighter. Thank god for Freddie McClair.
“Fuck No!” Cook shouted.
“I think you do,” Freddie shot back.
“I know I don’t.” Cook threw back.
“I thinks the man doth protest too much.” Freddie said with a mouth full of smoke and food.
“I thinks the man best shut up before he lose all his teeth!” Cook threatened.
“I think you two idiots should both shut up before I smack the both of you,” Naomi said, with a raise of her eyebrows. “Now one of you help me before I start talking about my period.”
JJ shot up at that and ran to the closet.
Gets him every time, Naomi chuckled. God, she loved her men. They were simple. Unlike Emily… fucking Fitch, bitch!
Chapter 3: Effy Withdrawal (Cook)
Chapter Three: Effy Withdrawal (Cook’s POV)
“Fucking hell!” Cook glared at Naomi’s door. What was taking the damn muff muncher so fucking long? Cook thought. Cook truly believed it was Naomi’s mission in life to make him absolutely miserable. He truly did believe that.
“God bless it, woman! Hurry the hell up! We’re late!” Cook wanted to get to Keith’s as soon as possible to see Effy.
“For fuck’s sake, Cook! It’s not even 10:30 yet! Just because you wanna be fucking dry hump Effy in front of all of us doesn’t mean we all wanna see it!” Naomi yelled through the door.
“Fuck off, Bitch! That’s not true!” It kind of was, but Cook would never admit that to Naomi, of all people. He’d never hear the end of it.
“Whatever.” Naomi shot back before falling silent again.
Sometimes Cook couldn’t believe he was even friends with Naomi— or any of them, for that matter— and even though he couldn’t believe it, he wouldn’t have it any other way. He met JJ first in middle school and they became unexpected; but instant, friends. The main reason he was Freddie’s friend was because the stoner fucking needed him. And Naomi … well, he didn’t quite know why he was friends with Naomi. It probably had something to do with the fact that she was a raging bull dyke. Naomi was the only girl (besides Emily Fitch) he hadn’t slept with at Roundview. He even fucked her slut sister, Katie.
Cook didn’t like Katie Fitch too much for the main reason that she somehow made it her mission in life to make poor JJ’s life a living hell. Freddie believed it was because she knew JJ used to have a major crush on her and she didn’t want JJ, who she considered a freak, liking her. But Cook just thought it was because she was a massive fucking bitch, plain and simple.
Cook began banging on Naomi’s door. Enough was enough! Time to go! He needed to see Effy. Sure, Cook knew he was falling hard for Effy, but he just wasn’t quite ready to admit it yet.
“Naomi! Come on!” Cook stopped banging when Naomi stepped out with a massive glare on her face. “You’re lucky my mum’s here or I’d fucking kill you!” Naomi whispered.
Cook gave her a cheeky smile in return. Cook and Naomi walked downstairs to see JJ and Freddie in an all out thumb war. What the fuck? Cook thought and he could tell Naomi was thinking the same thing.
“What the fuck you two doin’?” Naomi and Cook said at the same time.
“Freddie challenged me to a thumb war. What was I supposed to say? No?” JJ responded with a distracted look on his face. Freddie was winning and that just could not happen.
“Will you two be seventeen for two minutes so we all can get the fuck out of here before Cook pops a vein in his pretty little face over his Effy withdrawal!” Naomi spat.
Cook simply glared at her.
“Yeah, let’s get the fuck out of here!” Cook seethed.
“Wait!” Freddie exclaimed “I’m winning!” It was then that Naomi marched over toward JJ and Freddie and knocked Freddie’s thumb off of JJ’s. Freddie glared and JJ groaned.
“There! Nobody wins! Now let’s fucking go!” Naomi was beyond annoyed. Cook needed to calm the fuck down before she punched his lights out.
“This is your fault, man” Freddie said accusingly to Cook.
“Yeah… Calm down before Naomi kills us all,” JJ stated.
“Noted.” Cook headed for the door.
Cook thought that it would get better by the time they all got to Keith’s, but no god existed when it came to James Cook. Somehow Naomi became much more of a bitch in the last twenty minutes it took to get to Keith’s. JJ went into himself even more than usual, if that was fucking possible. Freddie was feeling the tension and it was ruining his goddamn high. And Cook was going through Effy withdrawal. He literally sped to Keith’s by the ten minute mark and then Naomi started yelling at him to slow the fuck down before he killed them all.
Cook never saw anybody move as fast to get out of a damn car as those four did that night: Freddie kissed the ground, Naomi kicked the van, and JJ threw up in the bushes next to the pub. Cook rushed to the front door, hoping to see Effy and he literally felt his heart drop into his stomach. Effy wasn’t there!
Cook felt sick and soon joined JJ in the bush to throw up, after yelling to the others that she wasn’t there.
Wow, he was really going through what Naomi called an Effy withdrawal, Cook thought. The last thing Cook remembered before puking in the bushes again was Naomi’s hysterical laughing. Cunt!
Chapter 4: Killing My High (Freddie)
Chapter Four: Killing My High (Freddie’s POV)
Freddie literally thought he was going to die tonight… whether Naomi or Cook was going to be his maker remained to be seen. Naomi looked ready to kill a bitch and Cook’s excitement to see Effy was giving him a lead foot. They were going ninety miles per hour, for the Lord’s sake!
“Cook! Slow down, mate! She ain’t going anywhere!” This seemed to only make Cook go faster. It was Cook, definitely Cook! It seemed like forever before the car stopped in front of Keith’s. Everybody got out of Cook’s van so fast that Freddie was surprised nobody got damn whiplash from their movements; Cook rushed to see Effy, JJ was throwing up in the bushes, and Naomi was cursing and profusely kicking the van. Probably thinking of Cook’s face, Freddie thought briefly before he bent down to kiss the ground, thanking Jesus, Mary, and Joseph he had lived through Cook’s insane Effy fix.
It wasn’t until Cook came out screaming about Effy not being there, followed by Naomi’s hysterical laughter, that somehow caused everybody to catch their bearings.
“So we’re early?” JJ asked.
“Seems so.” Freddie answered back and JJ was still puking and Naomi was still laughing.
It was times like this he was happy he had friends like Cook, Naomi, and JJ. Never a dull moment with these guys.
“So what we do?” Freddie asked Naomi.
“We fucking wait! Geez, Cook, you damn pussy! You’re making a bigger deal out of this then it is. We can just order a few pints and fucking wait. You’ll see your precious princess in a few hours.” Naomi pushed Cook into the bushes before pushing JJ and Freddie aside to get inside Keith’s. Wow, Naomi was on the war path tonight! Probably her impending Emily encounter was what got her on edge. Freddie, like the rest of them, knew how much Naomi hated Emily.
“Fucking bitch!” Cook exclaimed, pushing himself out of the bushes. “Good thing she didn’t push me into the puke bush.” Cook wiped himself off and also headed into Keith’s.
“You think we’ll survive tonight?” JJ asked out of nowhere. He hadn’t spoken since leaving Naomi’s.
Freddie seriously thought about that and shrugged. “Barely,” Freddie answered before also heading into Keith’s. These guys were seriously killing his high.