wheneverythingslipped



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    In their first year of marriage, Wei Ying and Lan Zhan learn and grow and form the family they've always dreamed of.

    //

    At 1.30pm, Wei Ying locks himself in a toilet cubicle at work and, very quietly, has a panic attack. The claustrophobia has been mounting all day -- has been mounting, if he's honest, since he returned from leave with pictures of A-Yuan and, apparently, the final key to making his family comprehensible to his co-workers. He was married, and he had a kid, and so he was just like them, cloyingly right and check-boxed and he couldn't breathe, couldn't breathe for the questions they kept asking him, for the way they kept looking at him, approving and like… like they understood him. Like he made sense.

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    Language:
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    40,027
    Chapters:
    2/2
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    01 Nov 2020

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    When you let the dead in, it takes a toll on you. There hasn’t been a single exception in history.

    (Or: second heir to the renowned Lan exorcist clan Lan Zhan takes medium Wei Ying home after a difficult exorcism. He's in for a long night.)

    Language:
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    10,014
    Chapters:
    1/1
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    27 Oct 2020

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    The man's laughter sounds like A-Die's, but it's all wrong. "Of course I'm not your A-Die, silly. I’m your Other A-Die," says Other A-Die. "You should go fetch your Other Baba. He's tuning your qins in your bedroom."

    When A-Yuan doesn't move immediately, Other A-Die raises a brow at him. Other A-Die grins. His teeth are very white.

    or: Modern cultivators AU where 11-year-old A-Yuan and his dads move into their new flat. Strange Things happen.
    Language:
    English
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    4,265
    Chapters:
    1/1
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    22 Oct 2020

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    “You know what?” Wei Ying said. “I think we should be friends.”

    “Vulcans do not have friends,” said Lan Zhan. He was staring very determinedly at the screen in front of him.

    Wei Ying frowned at him. “That can’t be right.”

    Language:
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    01 Oct 2020

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    "I do not wish to leave my future spouse… dissatisfied with my intimate knowledge,” Lan Zhan says, very seriously. “I am hoping to find an instructor, to better prepare myself for such matters."

    Wei Ying feels his mouth drop open. He's pretty sure the Second Jade of Lan just told him he's a virgin who wants to learn how to do sex good.

    Rogue Cultivator Wei Wuxian is the stuff of local legends. Some of those legends are even true! The ones about his tremendous experience in bed, on the other hand, are not so true. Which becomes a problem when Lan Wangji, on the verge of an arranged marriage and worried he won’t know how to please his future spouse, enlists Wei Ying's help to teach him the art of love-making. Wei Ying's great at improvisation, though, and is pretty sure he's got this sex mentor thing under control. What could possibly go wrong?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    58,307
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    603
    Kudos:
    5083
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    1703
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    22 Sep 2020