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Sneaking Around

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Kyle was somewhat uncomfortable in the house that was like a home to him growing up. He sat stiffly on the couch, his hand in Eric’s. They’d decided before they went into their senior year, they’d finally tell everybody. And everybody included Eric’s parents….

...and Eric’s father.

“So me and Kahl are boyfriends,” Eric’s voice wavered, but he still stared defiantly at Gerald, silently challenging him. “And we have been, officially, for a full year and eight days.”

Gerald spluttered.

“I should’ve seen this coming,” Gerald said with a shake of his head, “I told your mother not to coddle you so much as a boy—and to let you hang out with a Cartman was bad news!”

“Yeah? Well you can take your opinion and shove it,” Eric retorted, flipping his hand over to intertwine his fingers with Kyle’s. “We’re in love and you can’t do shit about it.”

“Oh yeah? Well I’m still your father, and I can start by forbidding you from seeing him! No son of mine is getting thousands of dollars of my money for college, just to spend it doing whatever the hell you faggots do!”

“Gerald!” Sheila shrieked suddenly.

“Really, Gerald? So it’s not gay if it’s done in a hot tub behind your wife’s back?” Eric smirked, bitterly joyous at the way Gerald’s face paled.

“No! It’s not! It’s not gay! How do you even know that?”

“And another thing?” Eric added, smug, “I don’t even need you for college, either. While you’ve been baiting teenage girls into committing suicide on the internet, I’ve been making a name for myself. Getting connections. Making good, honest money. Something you have never been privy to.”

Gerald was speechless. His mouth gaped like a fish. He turned to his wife, helplessly. Sheila, resolutely, refused to look at him. Little did he know, Eric had already told his mother everything, and he’d been saving up his speech for that moment, just to rub in the humiliation a little further.

He hadn’t told Kyle what Sheila would do after, but from the relief in his eyes, Kyle assumed she would take good care of the situation.

Gerald stormed from the room out the front door, his car starting up from outside. After he left, Eric heaved a shaky breath, his head falling onto Kyle’s shoulder.

“I’m very proud of you, Eric,” Sheila told him, “And I’m so very glad you two have each other! I always knew it, you know, mother’s intuition and all. Especially with the way you boys were always talking about each other! Oh! And Eric—your little journals!”

“Mom!” Eric whined, throwing his head back.

“They were so cute! The little drawings you did!” Sheila looked overjoyed, to be finally able to gush about her two precious boys, “And the way Kyle would always sneak into your room, Eric! It was so precious.”

Eric and Kyle’s eyes boggled.

“You knew about that?” Kyle asked.

“Of course I did! You boys were never very discrete, you know.” Sheila laughed, “Who do you think was the one who bought the new ladder when our old one started to rust? Certainly not Gerald! Kyle, you used that old thing more than anyone else ever did!”

Kyle and Eric blushed, Eric hiding his face in his boyfriend’s shoulder.

“At least now you and your boyfriend can use the front door, bubbie.”