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Girl Meets Lucas

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        “Lucas? Are you okay?” Cory questioned as he entered the Friar’s dark and quiet apartment.

        “Uh, y-yeah.” Lucas appeared from the hallway at the back corner of the apartment. He was clad in blue plaid flannel pajama pants and a white t-shirt.

        “You sounded upset on the phone, what happened?” Cory questioned, stepping farther into the room.

        “Uh, it was nothing, I shouldn’t have called, I don’t know why I did.” Lucas confessed uncomfortably. “I’m sorry to make you come over here, can I get you something or something.”

        “No, Lucas, there’s no need for that but I am worried about you.” Cory explained, stepping towards the young man. “I’m glad you called me but also, where are your parents? Did you call them too?”

        “It would have just worried them. My dad’s away and my mom’s left at seven to start her night shift at the hospital. She’s a nurse.” Lucas explained, “Neither of them could be here so it would just worry them more.”

        “So you’ll be home alone all night?” Cory questioned.

        “Yeah, but it’s not a big deal. I’m home alone all the time.”

        “How often do you spend the night alone?” Cory prodded.

        “A night or two a week.” Lucas shrugged. “It’s really fine, I guess I just freaked out or whatever.”

        “Pack some stuff, you can spend the night at our house. Maya’s already there so what’s one more kid huh?”

        “That’s ok Mr. Matthews, I’ll be fine, really.” Lucas smiled.

        “Lucas unless staying at our house tonight makes you uncomfortable I would really feel better if you stayed the night with us.” Cory in

        “No, it’s not that, it’s just, with Riley and Maya and, and I’m a bad sleeper and I shouldn’t.”

        “Lucas, the girls will be in their room and you can stay in Auggie’s room. You can come with us to school in the morning. I don’t like the idea of you staying here alone. Even if you just thought you heard something that can be scary. Please come stay with us for the night. Topanga makes fantastic pancakes.”

        “How can I say no to Mrs. Matthews pancakes?” Lucas smiled halfheartedly.

        Cory and Lucas arrived at the Matthews apartment around 8:45. They entered to find Riley, Maya and Topanga working at the kitchen table.

        “Hey honey.” Topanga smiled as she looked up, “Oh, hey Lucas.”

        “Lucas?” Riley questioned as her head popped up from her math homework. “Lucas!”

        “What are you doing here Hopalong?” Maya questioned.

        “Lucas will also be joining us for the night.” Cory explained.

        “What?!” The girls blurted in unison.

        “Yes. Now I believe it is time for you two to get ready for bed if you want to watch a movie.”

        “Be kind, rewind.” Maya said.

        “To what?” Cory questioned.

        “Lucas is staying the night?” Riley answered for her.

        “Yes. His parents aren't home tonight, so yes. Now, bed.” Cory instructed. With heavy sighs the girls folded their books and hopped off into Riley’s bedroom

        “Alright Mr. Friar, let me show you where you can stay tonight.” Cory smiled and led the boy down the hall and left his backpack in Auggie’s room. Ten minutes later the entire Matthew's family, Maya, and Lucas were all snuggled down into the livingroom watching The Secret Life of Pets.




 

 

        “Hey Ranger Rick, couldn’t sleep either?” Maya questioned, entering the kitchen late that night. The young man in question sat on the floor against the back wall of the kitchen under the bulletin board.

        “No, I guess not.” Lucas admitted quietly.

        “What happened man, you were yawning like crazy during the movie.” Maya chuckled.

        “I don’t sleep so well when I’m not at home.” Lucas shrugged.

        “Gotcha.” Maya sighed, “I used to be like that. Everywhere but here. I had a hard time sleeping in unfamiliar places but Riley made here familiar. Like home. Maybe you just need to feel a little more like home.” Maya suggested

        “Like what?” Lucas scoffed.

        “Like,” Maya looked around.

        Her eyes landed on the red flannel in his lap and she got it. She pushed herself up the wall and walked quickly to the couch, she pulled the a blue throw blanket off the back of the couch and returned to the corner of the kitchen. She pulled the flannel off his lap and draped the throw over him instead. She pulled the worn to softness flannel on over her white tank top and slumped down next to Lucas.

        “Like this,” She announced proudly. She tapped her right shoulder with her left hand. “Put your head down.” Lucas looked at her like she was crazy, “Just stop being cool or whatever for a minute and put your head down and close your eyes cause you're tired.”

        “O-okay.” Lucas whisper. He felt so incredibly awkward sitting there, his head on Maya’s shoulder, her bare leg up against his thin pajama clad ones. He supposed he did feel better though. The flannel she wore smelled like home, like All Free and Clear soap, cinnamon candle and the faintest hint of fire that lingered from when he would hang it up next to the fireplace all winter. He was exhausted, maybe he could just rest for a few minutes and be alright.

        “There you go.” Maya sighed and leaned her head on top of him. Lucas was asleep not three minutes after his head touched her shoulder.

 


 

 

        The clock read 4:36 when Maya was awoken. Yawning, she realised the reason she had woken up was the wetness on her leg.

        “Lucas. Lucas wake up.” Maya instructed, shaking the boy to her left.

        “Wh-what?” Lucas mumbled, confused and disoriented.

        “We gotta get up. We’re all wet.” Maya explained.

        “Wha-” Lucas was suddenly alert and frantic. “No, no, no, no, no, no.” Lucas chanted, frantically he crawled out of the puddle.

        “Lucas what-” Maya tried to questioned but shut up immediately when Lucas pulled his shirt off and began wiping the floor with it. After being momentarily distracted by the most incredible abs she’d ever seen in person. After gathering herself and resisting the urge to reach out and touch them, she spoke, “Lucas what on Earth are you doing?”

        “Gotta clean, so sorry. Gotta- sorry. So sorry. So so sorry. So sorry.” Lucas chanted incoherently.

        “Lucas what are you talking about?” Maya questioned. Lucas ignored her and continued mopping up the floor. “Lucas, Lucas, what’s going on?” Still Lucas ignored her and continued mopping the floor with his now soaked t shirt. Concerned, Maya grabbed his face with both hands and angled it to face her own. In the dim light from over the stove Lucas’s face was shadowy, but the fear on it was unmistakable. “Hey,” Maya spoke softer now, “What happened? You looked freaked Huckleberry.” Now with her left hand on his face and her right hand on his shoulder she could feel him shake.

        Lucas’s gaze dropped quickly to his now visible lap, no longer covered by the blue blanket, nor his position. It was in this moment that Maya’s gaze followed Lucas’s and landed in his lap. A large wet mark covered Lucas’s plaid pajama pants. The wet patch spanned from just below his knees to his crotch, though with further thought she figured that the stain had probably occurred from starting in the opposite direction. Slowly, she removed her hands from the hot, panicked face of her friend.

        “L-Lucas? D-did you, um, did you p-,” She stopped herself before saying the word out loud and tried again, “Did you have an accident?” Lucas brow wrinkled, his eyes got shiny and his lip quivered. With a shaky inhale, he nodded quickly, “Okay well, that’s okay. Right? Yeah, it’s cool, um, it’s not a big deal.”

        “I pissed my pants on the Mathew's kitchen floor. That's not okay, it’s not cool and it's not not a big deal.” Lucas said frantically.

        “It will be! Look I’ll get Mrs. Matthews and she can help.”

        “No! Please don’t tell her. Please, please.” Lucas’s head shook in distress.

        “Lucas. Come on. It’s ok.”

        “No. No. No.” Lucas panted, “No.” Maya reached her hand to touch Lucas’s shoulder and he panicked and jumped to his feet. “I-I. No. I can’t, I-I. No.” Lucas mumbled, shaking before darting to the bathroom.

 

        “Mrs. Matthews?” Maya questioned quietly into the dark room. “Mrs. Matthews?” Maya tried a little louder.

        “M-Maya?” Topanga questioned back into the darkness.

        “Yeah, yeah I need help.” Maya whispered back.

        “What’s wrong?” Topanga demanded as she pulled Auggie’s arm off her chest and untangled herself from the comforter and sheet. “What’s wrong honey?” Topanga asked again as she reached Maya in the doorway.

        “We uh, we have a bit of a situation in the kitchen that is currently hiding in the bathroom.”

        “What?” Topanga questioned, her brow furrowed in confusion.

        “Just, uh, it may be best if you just follow me.” Maya tried and proceeded to lead Topanga to the bathroom at the end of the hall. With a deep breath Maya laid her hand on the bathroom door. Topanga’s confusion grew.

        “Sundance? Sundance can you open the door please? Mrs. Matthews is here too, ok?”

        “No-no thanks.” Lucas stuttered from the other side of the door.

        “Come’on Lucas. Open the door.” Maya instructed.

        “No thank you.” Lucas repeated, his voice rough and wet.

        “Maya what is going on?” Topanga demanded. Maya just shook her head and kept her attention on the closed, locked door.

        “You can’t stay in there forever. You’ve got to be cold.” Maya all but whispered.  

        “No.” Lucas repeated with a sniff.

        “Lucas,” Maya said softly. “It’s ok.”

        “No.” Lucas squeaked.

        “Open the door, Lucas.” Maya repeated. There was a shuffling noise on the other side of the door before it opened. When it finally did, Topanga had to but on her best lawyer face not to react to the boy in front of her. Lucas stood in the doorway in soaked pajama pants and a red blotchy face.

        “Ok.” Topanga began, “How about you take a shower and I’ll get your backpack and some of Cory’s PJ’s for you, ok?” Lucas just nodded. If he was being honest he wasn’t sure if he could open his mouth without crying. “Ok.” Topanga smiled. “Ok. Um, there should be a towel in the closet.”

        “Mine’s clean. It’s the yellow one.” Maya added. Lucas nodded again and tried to smiled, an act which just made his face look more look more contorted. The women turned and Lucas closed the door behind himself. Maya led Topanga into the kitchen

        “Sooo what happened?” Topanga questioned turning to face the short blonde.

        “I don’t know.” Maya said honestly. “He just, like, peed.” Topanga had to restrain herself from rolling her eyes.

        “I gathered that. Was he standing in the middle of the kitchen and just started peeing or what?”

        “No! He was asleep.” Maya explained.

        “In the kitchen?”

        “Yeah, so I was thirsty so I came out to the kitchen and Lucas was sitting here and he was having a hard time sleeping so I sat with him on the floor and he fell asleep and I didn't want to wake him so I didn’t move, so I fell asleep and then I woke up cause there was,” Maya lowered her voice to a whisper, “Pee,” she raised it again, “All over my leg.” It was then Topanga looked down and saw that her gray and white striped PJ pants were in fact darker on the outside of the right thigh.

        “Oh, Maya, we have to get you something clean too.” Maya just shrugged.

        “I will, I just want to get this cleaned up before he gets out of the shower.” She said gesturing at the puddle on the floor. “It really embarrassed him and I don’t want it here when he comes out.” Topanga smiled.

        “You are a good friend Maya, but I am a mom, so I’ll clean this up. Why don’t you go get changed and bring Lucas his bag from Auggie’s room. I’ll get this cleaned up and grab him some clean jammies. Ok?” Maya nodded and shrugged.

        “Ok. Thanks Mrs. Matthew’s.” Topanga smiled and Maya turned to leave but stopped herself before turning the corner.

        “Mrs. Matthew’s?”

        “Yeah honey?”

        “What are you going to say to Lucas when he comes out?” Maya questioned. Topanga sighed.

        “For now, nothing. It’s been a long enough night for him.”

        “Ok.” Maya halfheartedly smiled before heading to Riley’s room.

Chapter Text

Maya knocked cautiously on the bathroom door, she felt like she was intruding on something private.

“Uh, Lucas.” She whispered. “It’s me.” Lucas opened the door halfway and stuck his head out. His hair was wet and his lower half was wrapped in a towel. “Here you go.” She smiled and handed him a wad of pajamas and the handle to his backpack filled with clothes.

“Thank you.” He said quietly, he couldn’t bring himself to look in her eyes so instead focused on where he belly button would be if he could see it.

“I got your back Ranger Rick.” Lucas smiled weakly.

 

When Lucas exited the bathroom ten minutes later in clean, borrowed pajamas, his skin pink from being scrubbed raw. If someone were to for some inexplicable reason, ask, Lucas would vehemently deny that he had cried in the shower. His red rimmed eyes and headache said differently.

He found Maya and Topanga in the kitchen at the table drinking Cocoa. It was almost three fifteen now.

“Hey Lucas, come, sit, do you want some cocoa?” Topanga smiled.

“Uh, no, thank you.” Lucas said awkwardly. Honestly the last thing he wanted was more fluid. Lucas stiffly sat on the bench next to Maya, leaving a solid eight inches between them, avoiding both women's gaze.
They sat in silence for a few minutes before Maya finished her Cocoa and Topanga spoke again.

“Alright, I’d like you two to go back to bed.” Lucas grimaced at her words. He didn’t know how how to tell her that there was no way he was going that.

“Mrs. Matthews,” Maya began.

“You don’t have to sleep if you don’t want to I just need you guys to get some rest.” Topanga explained.

“May I stay up and read, please.” Lucas begged.

“Lucas,” Topanga sighed.

“Mrs. Matthews please.”

“Can you do it in bed?”

“Y-Yeah.” Lucas agreed, nodding awkwardly and quickly.

“Ok. Then just read in bed and rest my dear.” Topanga said gently, she stood and cleared her and Maya’s cups into the sink. “Goodnight sweethearts.”

“Goodnight Ms. Matthews.” Maya smiled. When she was gone Maya looked at Lucas, who looked at his lap.

“Lucas,” Maya began uncomfortably. Lucas looked up at her quickly, and he looked as scared as he did when he realized he’d peed himself.

“Can we, can we please, please never talk about this ever again?” Lucas questioned. His voice was raw and his eyes pleading.

The next morning was awkward but as average as could be expected with an extra body, plus the regular extra body. Lucas and Maya were quiet as they ate their waffles but the silence was filled with comfortable chatter by Riley, Auggie and Mr. Matthews. The three kids left for school together, and by the time they made it onto the subway they were smiling and chatting, all three of them.

Lucas had stayed up and read all nineteen Mr. Putter and Tabby books, done one hundred and fifty pushups, seventy-five sit ups and deleted all of his junk mail. He’d gotten up before everyone else and was dressed, teeth brushed and hair spiked by the time Topanga entered the kitchen.

Things were awkward for a few days between Lucas and Maya but by the next Tuesday she was back to Huh-hurring in his face and calling him Bucky Mc Boing Boing. Lucas tried his best to forget about his humiliation and Maya did her best to forget about his abs. They did well for a few weeks too, until, that Friday.

Chapter Text

“The industrial revolution began in- Yes Mr. Friar?”

“May I go to the bathroom please?”

“Of course.”

“Thank you.” Lucas rose from his desk and made it halfway to the door before he had to cover his mouth and grab for the plastic trashcan next to his teacher's desk before leaping to the door. He made it just out and around the door before vomiting up the oatmeal he had for breakfast. After what was in reality two minutes but felt like forever as Lucas’s stomach forcefully voided itself without his permission in the silent hallway. When he finally felt somewhat sure that he was finished, he stepped back into the classroom, ears pink in embarrassment and face drained of color. Trash barrel to his chest like a life raft.

“Do you know where the Nurse’s office is Mr. Friar?” Cory questioned.

“No, sir.” Lucas said quietly.

“That’s alright, I prefer to have someone walk you anyway just in case.” Cory smiled.

“I can do it!” Riley said hopping to her feet.

“I’d like Farkle to walk with Lucas, actually.” Lucas nodded a thanks to Cory.

“I know where the nurse is.” Riley said.

“I know honey, but I’d like Farkle to go. Also, this way you won’t miss class.”

“Ok.” Riley begrudgingly sat down.

“Is that alright with you Farkle? Lucas?”

“Of course sir.” Farkle smiled and rose to walk with his dear friend. Lucas looked down at the vomit filled wastebasket in his arms.

“I can take care of that for you or you can take it with you.”

“M-May I take it with me?” Lucas questioned.

“Of course.” Cory smiled. “I hope you feel better.”

“Let's go.” Farkle led. The two boys walked in silence, which Lucas was quite grateful for as he wasn’t sure he could walk, talk, and not throw up, each task individually was getting more difficult the further he got in the morning.

“Farkle Minkus, how are you doing my dear?” Smiled a larger woman in her early fifties.

“Hi Nurse Nims. This is Lucas, he’s not feeling too great.” Farkle explained.

“Well why don’t you hop up on my table Lucas.” She smiled and showed the larger boy to the blue vinyl and paper covered exam table. “I see. Not what seems to be the problem?”

“I-I threw up ma’am.” Lucas explained as he climbed onto the table, his trash barrel of vomit still in his arms.

“I see that.” She laughed, looking at the bucket. “Can I take that for you?” Lucas looked unsure. “Or do you think you’re going to go again?”

“I-I might do it again.” He said quietly.

“Ok.” She said gently and walked back to her desk and checked her computer. “So Mr. Minkus you're coming from, ah, Mr. Matthews class, which would make you,” She scanned the screen, “Mr. Friar?” She questioned looking up.

“Yes ma’am. Alright, do you know if it’s better if I call your mother or father?” Lucas closed his eyes for a moment.

“My-my father, ma’am.” He said slowly, “My mother is in texas. But, um, his secretary may answer if he doesn’t recognize the number.

“Alright, Mr. Minkus, would you be willing to stay here while I go call Mr. Friar?”

“Yes ma’am. I’d like that.” Farkle smiled.

“Thank you.” The Nurse left the room and called Lucas’s father. Farkle sat on the chair next to the table. They sat in silence for a few minutes before that gross, stirring, flipping feeling in his stomach began again.

He looked up from his bucket to his friend and Farkle could see it in his face.

“You gonna go again?” Farkle questioned. Lucas nodded once before coughing up more stomach acid into the bin.

“Sorry.” He mumbled as he choked.

“It’s not a problem.”

“I just got off the phone with your father, he’ll be here soon.” The Nurse smiled as she re-entered the office. “I think it’s time you go back to class Mr. Minkus.”

“Ok. Thanks for letting me stay.” Farkle smiled as he hopped up from the chair, took the note the nurse had written him and left with a wave.

“Thanks for staying.” Lucas said with a half smile.

“How about you get some rest now.” The nurse instructed gently. Lucas nodded entirely and leaned against the wall behind him.

A tall, handsome man in a sharp suit entered the room some time later. “Lucas.” He greeted the boy with a nod.

“Sir.” Lucas sat up straighter and looked at the tall man’s chest.

“I hear you're sick.” The boy nodded.

“Yes, sir. I-I threw up.”

“I see.” He sighed. “Are you feeling better?”

“Uh- yes, sir.” Lucas stuttered.

“I’m glad. I’ll take you home and you can rest. You’ll be back to fighting shape soon.” The couldn’t help but smile at the comment. “Come on buddy. Let’s get you home.”

“Yes sir.” Lucas said and climbed off the table. He followed his father out of the building and into the car waiting in the lot behind the school. With a shaky breath, Lucas climbed into the backseat and sent up a quick prayer that he didn't vomit all over the back of his dads company car.

Chapter Text

“You’re at my house who were you expecting?” He questioned, brow furrowed.

“I don’t know. You're sick, I thought your mom or dad would open the door or something. I figured you were asleep or something.”

“Or something.” Lucas nodded.

“How are you feeling?” Maya questioned.

“Gross.” Lucas shrugged.

“Figures. You still pukin?” Maya questioned.

“Not for a couple hours.”

“That’s a plus.” Lucas shrugged again.

“I suppose.”

“Can I come in?” Maya questioned, dancing in the doorway.

“Oh, uh, yeah. Come in.”

“So, what have you been up to all day.” Maya asked, entering the apartment and slowly walking around.

“Uh, I watched some TV, read, took a nap, ate some soup.” Lucas listed.

“Cool, cool.” Maya nodded.

“Yeah.” Lucas said awkwardly.

“So.” Maya continued poking stuff in the Friars apartment.

“So.” Lucas answered.

“Where are your parents?”

“My mom's with my aunt back in Texas, she’s pregnant and it's not going too well. My dad’s in Toronto for a conference.” Lucas explained.

“So you are home sick, alone?” Maya turned to him and watched him while he spoke. His hair was matted down and sweaty, his eyes half lidded and tired. His face was pasty and there were bags under his eyes.

“Yeah.” Lucas shrugged.

“Well that settles it, I’m staying.” Maya said, plopping herself on the couch.

“What?” Lucas questioned looking up.

“I’m not leaving you alone if you are sick.”

“Maya I’m fine.” Lucas said, coming around the couch to stand by her.

“Nope. You're sick. You don't get to be sick alone you could die.”

“I’m not gonna die.” Lucas said shaking his head. Maya hopped up and stuck the back of her wrist

“You're warm, you could die.” She sighed, her hand still on his sweaty face.

“I’m not going to die.” He mumbled, shaking her off.

“Do you know your current temperature?” She inquired, doing her best to sound like a nurse.

“That's so scientific sounding.” Lucas smiled, trying to joke his way out of answering.

“Huckleberry.” Maya warned.

“It’s not so bad.” He shrugged.

“What is it?” She asked again.

“Humohnonhoinhe.” He mumbled.

“Huckleberry.” Maya repeated, exasperated.

“One oh one point three.” He sighed.

“Yep I’m staying here.” Maya announced, plopping herself back on the couch with a bounce.

“Maya.” Lucas said, trying to find the words to tell her to go.

“Don't fight me. Just turn on the TV or something.” She said, not even looking at him.

“Maya.” He tried again.

“I’m not leaving.” Sh said firmly, looking him straight in the eye and not wavering.

“Ok.” He sighed, sitting on the couch heavily.

_____________________________

“You need a nap.” Maya announced as Lucas stifled his seventh yawn of the episode, they were only fifteen minutes into the show. She turned to face the boy next to her on the couch.

“I’m not a child. I don’t need naps and I don’t need you to tell me to nap.” Lucas said indignantly.

“I’m not saying you do. I’m just saying you look like you need a nap.” Maya explained.

“I-I’m fine.” Lucas stuttered, trying to stop another yawn from escaping his mouth.

“Come on, take a nap.” Maya said, shoving his shoulder in hopes of getting his full attention.

“I don’t want to.” He shook his head.

“See, now you sound like a child.” Maya gestured at Lucas with her hand.

“I just don’t wanna take a nap.” Lucas still didn’t look at her.

“Well I wanna take a nap and I’d like you to take one with me.” Maya shrugged.

“You want to take a nap?” Lucas finally looked at her.

“I always want a nap Huckleberry. Today I just want to do it here with you.” She said, rolling her eyes.

“W-whith me?” Lucas stuttered feeling awkward trying not to think about what it would be like to lie in a bed with Maya.

“I want to sleep next to you. Don’t make this weird.” Maya warned.

“You want to sleep next to me?” Lucas repeated.

“See when you say it all slow like that it's weird.” Maya groaned. “I want to nap. I don’t want to leave you alone when you are sick. So I’ll nap here, you’ll nap next to me, that way I’ll know you're not like overheating or you’ve fallen and hit your head and you're slowly dying in your kitchen.”

“Why would I have fallen in the kitchen.” Lucas questioned smiling.

“You got up to get water but you are too weak to hold the glass so you dropped it and it shattered and you stepped on the glass and cut your foot and so you picked up your foot and hopped but it was wet so you slipped and on the way down you fell and hit your head on the counter and now you are dying and bleeding. Duh.” She sighed.

“Wow.” Lucas said slowly.

“It could happen.” Maya said, putting on her best scary face.

“But it wouldn't.” Lucas laughed.

“No it won’t because we will be safely napping and you will be next to me.” Maya grinned.

“O-Ok.” Lucas muttered.

“Good. Where’s your room?” Maya slapped her hands on her thighs, she was ready to go.

“W-What?!” Lucas’s whole face showed her shock and Maya grinned.

“You are too big to sleep on the couch with me and be comfy.” Maya explained.

“We can’t sleep together in my bed.” Lucas said quickly, his pulse quickening and hand starting to shake.

“Nap. It sounds less weird and sexual if you say nap. I want to nap with you, not sleep with you.” Maya explained.

“Fine. We can’t nap together in my bed.” Lucas sighed, playing into her language.

“Why? Is it a single bed? Is it covered in laundry?”

“N-No it’s big enough and my rooms pretty clean I-I just don’t know if we should be in my bed together.”

“Why?” Maya questioned.

“Because.” Lucas said, looking away.

“Why?” She prodded.

“I don’t know.”

“Give me one good reason and I swear I’ll stop asking.”

“It’s just, it feels inappropriate.” Lucas said, uncomfortable.

“Ugh. Fine. We’ll nap on the couch.” Maya sighed.

“Thank you.” Lucas smiled.

“We’ll nap on the couch and then watch a movie and order chinese and then we’ll nap all night in you're bed.” Maya stood up.

“Nap all night?” Lucas asked.

“Oh, yeah, I’m staying over tonight.” Maya said, as if it was obvious.

“What?” Lucas questioned. Maya sighed at having to explain herself.

“You're parents are gone all night, right.” She questioned.

“Yeah.” Lucas said.

“So I’ll stay here and make sure you don’t die.” She said in her best duh voice.

“You can’t stay here.” Lucas sighed.

“Except I am.” Maya grinned.

“Maya,” Lucas sighed.

“Don’t argue with me Sundance, you’re too sick for that crap.” Maya countered.

“I don’t like it.” Lucas said, he didn’t like the idea of a girl spending the night when he was home alone, it made his tummy turn in a way he didn’t appreciate.

“I know. But I won’t sleep unless I know you're safe.” Maya sighed. Lucas was taken aback by that, he had expected something sarcastic and silly not so, well, dear.

“That’s actually really sweet of you.” Lucas said, surprised.

“Yeah, don’t get used to it.” Maya threatened.

“Ok.” Lucas smiled.

“You nap, I’m going to get home to get my toothbrush and clean underwear. I’ll be back when you wake up.”

Chapter Text

“This bed is fantastic.” Maya said, snuggling down. Swishing her bare, clean shaven legs on the soft blue sheets.

“Uh, thanks.” Lucas said awkwardly. He stood, uncomfortably straight, rocking on his heels next to the bed.

“Are you gonna get in?” Maya questioned, pulling the comforter up to her chin.

“Uh, yeah?” Lucas mumbled, lifting the blanket on his side and climbing into bed.

“Ok now that can’t be comfortable.” Laughing at her friends awkwardness.

“What?”

“Dude you’re in jeans. Put on some pj’s or something, you're stressing me out. You're sick, you're supposed to be in pjs in bed.”

“I um, I don’t have any clean pajamas. My laundry is in the wash.”

“Ok, take your pants off in sleep in your underwear.”

“Maya I cannot sleep in my underpants in a bed with you. That’s- that's not ok. It’s not appropriate.”

“What if I sleep on top of the covers?” Maya questioned.

“Then I’ll be in my underpants under the covers next to you. That’s still inappropriate.”

“Why Sundance?”

“Its just- ugh.” Lucas looked away. “I am a boy and you are a girl and my parents aren't home and it seems wrong.”

“You are an exhausted boy with a 101 fever, I am a girl who calls you Heehaw and hu-hurrs in your face, you're parents aren't home because they are doing there thing and won’t be back and you are sick and you are tired and you're tummy hurts and I just want to take a nap with you so take off your pants and get into bed and go to sleep and when you wake up we will still be friends and still be fine and all will still be ok.” Maya explained, exasperated.

After a long moment of thinking Lucas turned away, took a deep breath, and slowly unbuckled his belt, carefully popped his button, unzipped and shimmied out of his dark wash jeans. With a sharp exhale he stepped out of his pants and turned to face the bed.

“Stop being weird and get in the bed Hop- along.”

“I-I am.” Lucas studded.

“Sex is going to be interesting for you.”

“W-What?”

“You don’t even want to get into bed next to me in your underpants and I’m your friend. How’s it going to work when you're naked and trying to get in bed with a naked girl?” Maya laughed.

“I- I don’t want to talk about this.” Lucas said, closing his eyes.

“Ok.” Maya dragged out the word and smiled.

“Thank you.” Lucas said honestly, opening his eyes.

“We can talk about it in the morning.” Maya grinned cheekily.

“Maya!” Lucas groaned.

“I’m kidding! Probably, just get into bed Ranger Rick, let’s go to bed.” Maya laughed, lifting up the comforter on his side of the bed.

“I’m coming.” Lucas took a deep breath and climbed into bed awkwardly, staying as close to the edge as humanly possible. He straightened his legs and rolled to face away from Maya, pulling the comforter up to his chin. His plan was to lay on the edge of the bed until she fell asleep, then get up, pee again, and try to get a little sleep on the couch.

“You cannot possible sleep like that every night.” Maya said to his back.

“I’m fine here.” Lucas mumbled.

“Sure you are.” Maya rolled her eyes and reached over to her bedmate. She grabbed Lucas shoulder and yanked him towards her, flipping him onto his back. When he was she latched onto his right arm and pulled herself closer to him.

“Maya what,” Lucas began as Maya rested her head on his chest.

“Shut up. We are snuggling. Go to sleep.” Maya mumbled into his chest. Lucas opened his mouth to protest but, honestly he didn’t have much of a protest. He didn’t like the idea of being in a bed with her, and he sure as hell wasn’t comfortable being in bed with her in his underwear. If he had another, god he hated calling it an accident, if he had another accident there would be no hiding it. It also made him uncomfortable because he knew it wasn’t proper and it was new, and it, it made his tummy turn in a different way than the vomit of earlier had. He did however like the weight of her head on his chest, and the way her hair smelled, and how warm she was. God she was so warm and nice smelling. Between that and her steady breathing, he was out cold in minutes.

Chapter Text

When Maya woke up a few hours later it took her a moment to remember where she was and how she ended up here. She was still in Lucas’s bed, with her arm across his chest and her leg across his thighs, her stomach pushed up against his side. Once she realized where she was and her senses came back to her she immediately felt the wet on her thigh and realized what had happened.

“Oh bubba.” Maya mumbled. She sat up as much as she could without disentangling herself from Lucas. “Sundance,” She whispered, “Sundance, wake up.”

“Hmm?’ Lucas groaned.

“Sundance, you had an accident, we have to get up.” Maya explained. Her words were like a bucket of ice water and he sat up immediately

“No! No no no fuck! Fucking fuck!” Lucas chanted, scrambling to get up, pushing Maya off of him.

“It’s ok.” Maya tried to comfort as Lucas jumped out of the bed and gripped his hair in his hands, he was shaking. “We can clean everything up, it's ok.” Lucas began shaking his head, still mumbling no to himself.
He was staring at the sheets, and god, he looked so scared. His eyes were filling and Maya didn’t think she could handle it if he cried, it was too sad and too, the word appeared in her mid before she could stop it, cute. God he looked so fucking cute. She knew it was bad, and if he thought sleeping in the same room was inappropriate he sure as hell wouldn’t approve of what was going on in her brain, but, come on. He was a white t-shirt and boxers and his hair was all sticking up from sleep. His boxers were soaked, as was the bottom of his t shirt. Between that and his sad little stupid face, Maya had to stop herself from outwardly saying “aw.”
She knew it was bad, he was her friend. Plus, he was kind of seeing Riley. Plus, she had specifically said she didn’t like him. Plus, he was sick. And sad. She couldn’t be busy liking him when he was sick and sad. But she did. Fuck she even liked him better this way. All vulnerable and needing her to take care of him. She wanted to take care of him, fuck did she want to take care of him.
Blinking back to the moment at hand and seeing the sweet boy’s face, Maya climbed out of the bed and stood in front of him. She slid her hands up to cup his face and push his hands out of his hair. When she touched him his head dropped, he couldn’t bring himself to look at her so instead he looked at the floor and tried not to cry.

“It’s ok, Lucas. It’s ok.” Maya whispered, holding his head.

“”S not. ‘S not ok.” Lucas mumbled, his head shaking in her hands. Maya rubbed her thumbs across his cheeks, his face scrunched up as he tried really, really hard not to cry. God, fuck was he trying not to cry.

“Well, it’ll be ok.” She sighed and slid her hand down his arm, taking his hand in her own. Lucas shook his head.

“Won’t.” She sighed.

“Will. Will be ok. It’ll all be ok. We just, we just need a shower and some clean sheets.” She slid her hands up his face and ran them through his hair. He was still warm, like really warm, and his skin and hair were sweaty. He was still fevery and it made him even more adorable. She cupped her hand on the side of his head and rubbed her thumb through his hair. She didn’t miss the way his face softened as he leaned into it before pulling away.

“Come on.” She slid her hand down his arm and took his hand, leading him to the bathroom. She closed the door behind them and didn’t look at him. She turned on the shower and pulled a towel off the shelf.

“Take those off.” She instructed, still not looking at him. “Then hop in.” She waited a minute, but heard no movement and turned around to find the boy exactly where she had left him. “Ok.” She smiled and took him by the bicep and pulled him to the toilet, shoving him down on the closed lid. She leaned down and grabbed his t-shirt by the hem. “Lift your arms.” Lucas followed her instruction and she pulled the shirt off over his head, she tossed it on the floor. “Hop up.” She patted the back of his shoulder and he stood. She pushed him towards the shower and stuck her hand under the water. Satisfied with the temperature, she shook the water off. Taking a deep breath, she pulled his boxers down to his ankles. She tapped his right ankle, “Up,” he lifted his foot. She repeated the action with his left foot. “Step in.” The way he swayed when he stepped in made her nervous, “Sit down.” He nodded and lowered himself slowly. She pulled the curtain closed and climbed onto the vanity next to the sink and leaned herself against the wall.

Chapter Text

“Don’t forget to wash with soap.” She called from her perch. She sat, staring at the wall, picking off her nail polish, closely examining herself in the mirror, until the water turned off. She hopped up then and grabbed the towel with the embroidered green Lucas on it and opened the curtain. She kept her eyes high as he stepped out of the shower, shaking. He hugged himself and stood shaking on the mat.

Again Maya was struck with the urge to say aw, or to squish his face, or kiss him or something. He was so fucking cute standing there all wet, holding himself, his eyes were tired and glassy and he could barely stand up. Maya thought there must be something wrong with her because the more vulnerable and needy he looked as was, the more she wanted him. Again pulling herself back to the moment and task at hand, Maya took the towel in her hand and gently dried his face. When she was happy with that, she held one end of his towel at his right hip and wrapped the towel around his waist, tucking it in on the left hip when he was fully covered.

Let’s get you some warm clothes, ok?” Lucas nodded and stepped forward toward the door. Maya bent down and scooped up his shirt off the floor and used the shirt to grab the soggy boxers too before following Lucas back to his room. Lucas stood in the middle of the room and shivered as Maya dropped the wet clothes in the basket of laundry by the door and made her way to his dresser.

a deep breath she opened the top drawer. One would think after seeing his bare ass as he got into the shower, getting a pair of underwear out of a drawer would be nothing. Undressing someone was most certainly more intimate than dressing them, right? Except, it didn’t feel that way in this moment, and sure, she supposed it was less sexy, but, picking out his clothes and helping him put them on seemed awfully intimate to her. And, by the way he shivered and swayed she was pretty damn sure that fever was back and pretty damn sure she was going to need to help him.

She looked in the drawer it became obvious to her that she had been right, getting him dressed was going to be a whole new adventure. The drawer, which was usually neatly organized, was currently a mess. Underwear that were usually folded and sorted by style were pushed out of the way, displaying the double layer of pull ups that were always hidden under the clothes. Maya’s eyes widened and she pulled one out. In most cases she supposed she would have left them there and acted like she’d never seen them, but now would be a perfect time to have one of these on hand. Deciding that even sicky, sleepy, weepy Lucas may want the added dignity, she pulled out a couple pairs of boxers and tucked the pullup in them. She found an undershirt in the drawer below and with a big breath turned and made her way to the dry corner of the bed.

Come here bubba.” She instructed. Lucas came and stood in front her and she looked at him. She’d been trying to avoid doing so since they’s gone to the bathroom. His hair was wet and his face was red. His eyes fluttered as he tried to keep them open, his arms were stilled wrapped around his body. In doing so he was displaying his arms and, good god were they great arms. The arms were almost as great as the pecs they covered, which were almost a delicious as the abs beneath them. Fuck was he a good looking dude. Maya looked him over top to bottom before returning her gaze to his face. She stood then, and pulled him down onto the spot she had been sitting.

How are you feeling?” She questioned as she laid her wrist on his forehead. He closed his eyes and leaned into her.

Yucky.” He mumbled, she smiled.

What feels yucky?” She questioned, her voice deep and mumbly, matching his.

My tummy and my head and my body.” She took her arm away and he blinked and looked at her. “You're all wet.”

“A little bit,” She smiled and pulled on the wet part of her shorts leg. “But that's ok.”

“Let’s get you dressed, ok?”

“‘K.” He nodded. She smiled and picked up his t-shirt. She crumpled it, opened the neck wide, and pulled it over his head. “Arm,” He stopped hugging himself and let her put his left arm through its hole, then his right and pull the shirt down to cover him. “Thats better.” She smiled and reached for the underwear and pulled the pullup out. His eyes got big, Times Square Ball big.

He looked at the pullup, look up at her, and burst into tears. Big, fat, hot tears.

“Come here.” She instructed, taking his shoulder and pulling him towards her. Any other time he would have run in the opposite direction, but he was too tired and too sick and too hot and cold and mixed up, so, instead, he fell into her chest and wrapped his arms around her and cried into her boobs.

Maya, for her part, felt like she was going to explode. He was too fuckig cute to handle right now and she wanted to squeeze him till he popped. As that was not an option, she settled for burying her right hand in his hair, wrapping her left arm around him, pulling him close and kissing the top of his head.

“Sh, sh, sh,” She shushed, rocking him side to side, rubbing circles on his back. He cried for about two minutes, took some ragged breaths, hiccuped, yawned, and rubbed his head into her before pulling away. Maya’s hand remained in his hair. Lucas felt better. He was still exhausted and pretty fevery, but, he felt a bit better.

“I just want you to sleep comfortably so that you can get better.”

“I don’t want to pee the bed.”

“I know bubba.”

“I don’t do it on purpose.”

“I know.”

“I just can’t stop. I try, and I can’t”

“I know.”

“I don’t like it.”

“I know. That’s why you have these though, so you don’t have to worry.”

“Ok. But I don’t like it.”

“I know.” She smiled and picked back up the pull up, opening it and squatting in front of him. She tapped his right foot and he slid it in before repeating the action with his left foot. He stood up and she pulled the pull up all the way up to his hips, pulling the towel off when he was covered. Lucas grabbed at and buried his hands in the hem of his t-shirt.

He didn’t like wearing his pullup. Putting it on was always the very last thing he did before going to bed and taking it off was the very first thing he did in the morning. It had been forever since he’d been around someone wearing it, and the last time it had just been his Mama. He’d never told his friends, and they’d certainly never seen him in one. Even sleepy and fevery he felt overexposed.

“Here,” Maya, seeing his distress, picked up a pair of boxers off the bed. “Put there on too.” Lucas took the underpants, and, with no grace, and little balance, pulled them on. His pullup stuck up over the hem of the boxers, but Maya chose not to comment. “Perfect, now we just need to get the bed and I into something dry and then we can go back to sleep.” Lucas looked at her then, she was wet.

“You're wet. You're wet. I got pee on you. I peed on you.” Lucas said, horrified. His eyes widened, and it looked like he was about to cry again.

“It’s ok, it’s ok, I’ll where this.” She picked a pair of underwear off the bed, they were boxer briefs and too big for her.

“Those are my underwear.” Lucas told her, as if she hadn't pulled them out of his underwear drawer.

“Can I borrow them?” She questioned with a grin.

“No, they touched me naked.”

“But these are clean? Plus, I touched you naked.” She laughed.

“I don’t like it.” Lucas looked down and shook his head.

“I’m sorry. Would you rather I just be naked?”

“No, no more naked. No more naked.”

“Ok.” She turned around and pulled down her shorts and underwear down, shimmied and stepped out of them and pulled the boys underwear on. They were a little too big but when she rolled the top they stayed on. She leaned over, picked up her own clothes, turned around and faced the wide eyed boy.

“What? What’s wrong?” She questioned.

“Butt.” She laughed.

“I saw yours, so you get to see mine. That’ll be our deal. Now, lets get this cleaned up.” She sighed, turning her attention to the bed.

“I can do it.”

“It’s cool. It’ll take me two seconds.” She shrugged, beginning to pull the comforter and top sheet off the bed.

“I can get clean sheets.” Lucas offered.

“Perfect.” Maya smiled, pulling the fitted sheet off the bed.The mattress beneath was covered by a thin mattress pad, as she pulled it off Maya found that the underside was plasticy, it had been specifically put there to protect the mattress from accidents such as these. She balled the sheets and pad up in themselves, wrapping the piss soaked parts in the dry parts and tossing the ball next to Lucas’s laundry basket. Lucas returned a minute later with a fresh set of gray flannel sheets and three navy towels. With a smile, a nod, and not a word, Maya took them from him. She laid the towels flat over the wet spot and pulled the fitted sheet and top sheet over them. The comforter has remained unscathed by the accident, most of the piss had been absorbed by the sheets and the pair pajamas, so she pulled it up over the bed with a satisfied sigh.

“Ok. Let's sleep now.” She grinned and climbed back into the bed, much like she had five hours prior. For his part, Lucas made much less fuss this time around. He climbed under the blankets without objection and quickly flicked off the light on his nightstand. Maya reclaimed her place by his side, her right arm across his chest, hand lightly gripping the shoulder of his tshirt. Her right leg was slung across his hips, her thigh resting on the padding of his pull-up. This time though, Lucas breathed into her touch instead of backing away. His hand found the back of her head and tangled itself in her hair, gently holding her body against his own. His left hand coming up to hook his finger in her right hand. Comfortable, even with the skin of her leg touching the skin of his own, Lucas closed his eyes, and let out a breath.

“I love you goodnight Huckleberry.” Maya's words were just a breath against his neck, but he heard them, and they made him smile, because he believed her.

Chapter Text

When Lucas woke up later that morning it took him a minute to remember what had happened the night before. He was feeling better, less groggy. And being less groggy, he realized what had happened last night.

“Fuck.” He was wearing a pullup. Maya had seen it. And she’d seen him naked. And now her leg was laying across his pullup. Which was wet. He’d peed himself again. And he still had to go. “Maya. Maya, I have to get up. Maya, please.”

“No. More sleep. Tired.” Maya mumbled, trying to bury her head further into the comforter and Lucas’s armpit.

“Maya I need to get up.”

"So comfy.”

"Maya. Please. Please, I have to, fuck, Maya I have to pee.” Lucas’s words got faster as he completed the sentence. Maya sighed, lifting her right shoulder, then left. Stretching her back.

:That seems anatomically impossible.” Maya extended her hips, trying to pop them. In the process she rubbed her thigh over the front of the pull up. Lucas grabbed her thigh, holding it still.

"Stop. Please.” He begged, his voice heavy.

"Ok.” Maya conceded.

"I have to get up.”

"Ugh,” Maya groaned, rolling off the boy. He then scrambled out of bed and to the bathroom. After starfish stretching, and grabbing her phone, she followed him.

"Maya! Get out!” Lucas exclaimed as Maya entered the occupied bathroom without warning. Lucas quickly cut off his stream and covered his penis with both of his hands. Maya hopped onto the counter.

"What? I’m not gonna look at your dick if that's what you're worried about. Not that I haven’t had an abundance of chances to do so.” She laughed, checking her phone.

"Maya!” Lucas squeaked.

"Finish peeing Huckleberry, it’s weirder if you stop.”

"I-I can’t. Please leave.”

"You can.” She sighed, “Look, I’ll look away.” Maya turned pointedly to the wall. Lucas looked quickly at Maya, then at his hands before deciding he still really had to pee and giving up. “Thatta boy!” Maya grinned as the loud sound of urine hitting water echoed in the room.
“Please don’t say that.” Lucas groaned.
“Ugh, fine.” Maya rolled her eyes and began tapping the counter. “Yo, any chance you have pancake mix? I’m like craving pancakes.”
“You followed me to the bathroom to ask me if there is pancake mix?”

"Mostly I got lonely real quick. Also, yeah.”

"I can’t handle you.” Lucas mumbled, shaking off and tucking himself back in.

"Eh, I wasn’t meant to be handled.”

"Yes, what was I thinking.” Lucas rolled his eyes and flushed.

"I haven’t a clue.” Maya pushed up from her perch and hopped to the ground. She stepped around Lucas and shimmied out of her boxers.

"What are you doing?” Lucas questioned.

"I gotta pee. Look away if you want.” Maya shrugged, sitting, and beginning to pee.

"Can’t you wait until I leave?” Lucas asked, looking at the wall.

"Could, don’t wanna. I’m making it even, you pee in front of me, I pee in front of you.” Maya shrugged, still peeing.

"Why do you have to say stuff like that?” Lucas groaned.

"Shit like what?” Maya questioned, finishing and wiping.

"That, and, god Maya. You know this makes me uncomfortable.” Lucas shook his head, making sure to not look up from the counter.

"I know. That’s like half of why I do it.” Maya shrugged, flushed, and turne d on the sink.

"To fuck with me?” Lucas demanded, finally looking at Maya as she washed her hands.

"To fuck with your rhythm, to shake shit up in your life. I like to make you uncomfortable, it makes you all flustery and adorable.” She dried her hands on the towel, and proceeded to put her hands on his face.

"I’m not adorable.” Lucas pouted.

"You are.” Maya grinned. “But,” She quickly released his face and grabbed the hem of his shirt and pulled it up, laying her right hand on his abs. “You’re very sexy too.”

"Maya!” Lucas squeaked, jumping back, his face turning red.

"What?” She laughed, “It’s true.”

"Don’t say that.” He mumbled, looking down.

"Why? It's true.”

"Cause I don’t like it. You- You can’t just say those things.”

"I just like to remind you that you are cute and sexy sometimes in case you forget.”

"Maya,” Lucas began.

"Can I make pancakes, please?” Maya smiled. She did that thing where she scrunched up her shoulders, tilted her head and smiled with her tongue out a little. Lucas couldn’t feel awkward when she was being all cute like that. So, he sighed, and rolled his eyes dramatically.

"Yeah. We have mix in the cupboard.”

"Chocolate chips?” Maya questioned excitedly.

"Baking cupboard.” Lucas nodded. Maya took his hand, turned him around, and pulled him towards the kitchen.

"Whipped cream?” She asked, having turned around to address him she now walked backwards. Much to Lucas’s amusement.

"Maybe in the back of the fridge, how are you not a giant?”

"Fast metabolism, tendency to skip meals when painting, oh yeah and the fact that we walk like four miles a day.”

"Whatever.” He sighed, leaning against the counter.

"Whatever, whatever. You just jealous.” She grinned and poked his stomach. “You gotta work out for yours.” She lifted the front of her shirt up high enough that the lace of her bralette showed, “And I’m sexy AF as is.”

Though he didn’t want to admit it, even to himself, Lucas couldn’t help but agree. And sexy was just the tip of the Maya iceberg, ‘cause good god was she the fucking cutest thing he'd ever seen making pancakes and dancing in the kitchen to the Jonas Brothers.

Chapter Text

“So. Let's talk about what happened last night.” Maya said, taking a bite of her pancake.

“Let's not and never say we did and also never talk about it again.” Lucas attempted to joke, uncomfortable and anxious.

“Lucas I'm being serious.” Maya groaned, putting down her fork, and looking at the boy.

“Me too. I seriously never want to talk about it.”

“Does this happen every night?”

“I'm not talking about this.”

“Yeah, well, I am. Cause not talking about it scares me.”

“Why the hell does it scare you?”

“Because you were really upset Lucas. I mean, I know you were feverish and exhausted but you were really, really upset. And I let you not talk after what happened at Riley's but now we are talking.”

“It’s not a big deal.”

“You sobbing felt like a big deal.”

“I'm sorry.”

“No, fuck, Lucas I don't want you to be sorry you didn't do anything wrong I just need us to talk about this because not talking about it means my brain imagines things and the things it's seeing is you waking up wet and alone in a dark empty apartment and I can't take that okay!”

“Hey, hey, come on. Come on it's ok. I don't- it doesn't happen like that all the time. I promise. I swear. Most of the time it's just me waking up in a wet pull up and feeling really fucking shitty about myself.”

“Don't. Don't feel shitty cause you're awesome and I love you, you fucking cowboy.”

“I love you too, but, it's still a shitty feeling.”

“You wear them every night? Since forever?”

“Just about. Since I got here. I stopped, doing what I do, when I was like twelve and for like a year and a half it was awesome and I was fine and then we came here and it started again. So now every night that someone won't see I wear it.”

“What about your parents? They must know. What do they say.”

“My mama knows. She buys them and leaves them under my bed. My father knows I did, but, he thinks I stayed done doing it. I'm supposed to be a man now, so, so I didn't tell him.”

“You're not a man, and when you are this isn't going to stop you from being one.”

“I piss my diaper like a baby. Men don't do that.”

“So what, this is your thing. Everybody gets a thing.”

“Not like this.” Lucas shook his head.

“It's your thing, it can be whatever the fuck it is.”

“Whatever.”

“Don't whatever me. You're the perfect Lucas just the way you are.”

“Whatever you say Maya.”

“Exactly and that's what I say so it be law and truth.”

“Eat your pancakes.”

“You bet your pretty little ass I will.”

Chapter Text

The next time Maya showed up at Lucas’s door was seven weeks later. It was a rainy, cold, Friday afternoon at the end of an impossibly long week. She had just come from the Matthews where she’d hugged and sent Riley off for a weekend with her family at her grandparents. It was 4:58 when Maya knocked on the Friars apartment door.

“Hey.” She said softly when the door opened.

“What are you doing here?” Lucas questioned.

“I wanted to see you.” She had that cute little half smile that would have made Lucas smile if he wasn’t so skeptical.

“Why?” Maya and he weren’t the kind of friends who just showed up at each others houses. Maya and Riley were. Zay and him were back in Texas. Not here as the commute was too long to risk it, especially now that they both had cell phones.

“I wanted to check on you.” She said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

“Why?”

“‘Cause this weeks been long. And you seemed out of it.” She shrugged.

“I’m fine.” He assured.

“You’re tired.” She countered. He was and she knew it.

“Yeah, I’m fine though.” He smiled. He was usually pretty good at convincing people he was okay. Not that it was hard, people just assumed. He was one of those guys who just was okay. He was okay, and he was happy, and things were good. For all intents and purposes, it was good to be Lucas.

It usually it was. He was a generally happy guy. He had a good family, they were kind, albeit a bit absent, and they loved their son. But he was alone a lot. And he was doing a lot of high level classes. And he was in the middle of the debate season. And he was on the student council. And baseball preseason had just started again. And midterms were in two weeks.

“Yeah, sure.” Maya rolled her eyes.

“So,” Lucas began, ready to ask her to leave and suggest they maybe meet tomorrow.

“Are your parents home.” Maya interrupted.

“No.” Lucas said slowly, this wasn’t going to end well. He didn’t know how it was going to end, but it wasn’t going to be good.

“When will they be back?” She questioned.

“Sunday night. Unless the snow hit them, then later.”

“Cool.” She pushed past him, into the apartment.

“What are you doing?” He said, spinning to follow her.

“Coming in.” She laughed, heading across his living room into his kitchen.

“Maya, I know Riley's gone, but I’m too tired to hang out.” Lucas closed the door, and followed her.

“I know, I came over to make sure you rest.” Maya didn’t look at him when she spoke, she just opened the cupboard and got herself a glass.

“I can rest on my own.” Lucas leaned against the island. He really was exhausted and he didn’t anticipate being able to get rid of Maya quickly.

“No, you're going to try to study, or work out, or clean, or something, and what you need to be doing is sleeping, and watching TV, and not thinking.” Maya pulled open the freezer and grabbed a handful of ice, and dropped in into her glass.

“I will, but I have to get things done too.” Lucas tried to explain.

“No you don’t.” She closed the freezer.

“Maya,” Lucas tried again.

“Lucas.” Maya turned, placed her glass on the island and looked him straight in the eye. Both her voice, and face were devoid of their usual mischief. “ I’m not joking, I’m not being a jerk or just trying to ruffle your feathers. I’m worried about you. You are trying to do to much, and you are going to wear yourself out.”

“O-Okay.” Lucas conceded, taken aback by her seriousness.

“Good. So what have you done this afternoon and what do you think you need to do?” Having won, she turned her attention back to the fridge and began moving things to get to the grape juice.

“I just got home from practice. So I need to shower, and wash my uniform, and my regular laundry. I have that math worksheet to do, and I have to study for that physics test. And I should start gathering quotes, and outlining the english essay.” Lucas listed.

“You can study for 30 minutes a day, I will run your laundry, and you can outline next weekend.” Maya pulled the juice out, opened it, smelled it, smiled, closed the fridge and began to pour herself a glass.

“Maya these aren’t things that I can but off. These are must do’s, that’s not even mentioning the should do’s. I should clean my room, I should go to the batting cage, I should get some pitching practice in. I should start memorizing my notes for debate. I should do more research for that, and I should organize the student council notes. I should also start studying for my AP gov midterm. And my physics midterm.” Lucas tried to explain, he felt like all he was doing in this conversation was trying to explain things to her. Maya, for her part was ignoring his argument.

“No. You are not starting any of that until Monday. We will organize your schedule this weekend. Tonight you can shower, and we will put your gross smelly baseball clothes in the laundry. Tomorrow, we will talk about the rest.” She finished by taking a giant, satisfying gulp of her juice, and sighing.

“Maya, that’s not going to work, I need to start now if I’m going to get it all done.” Lucas sighed. She wasn’t listening to him. She topped off her juice, and put the bottle away.

“You aren’t going to get it all done. You are going to get don what needs to be done, and we will make sure that happens. Tomorrow. Now, come take a shower.”

“I have to start the laundry first.”

“No, first you have to drink this juice, then strip, then shower. I’ll start the laundry while you wash you.” Maya slid the glass to Lucas, Lucas’s brow wrinkled, and he shook his head.

“You're not doing my laundry.”

“I don’t care, it takes two seconds.”

“Its gross, and I won't make you touch it.” Lucas insisted.

“You aren’t making me, I’m telling you I’m going to. Now drink your juice. It’s good for you.”

“It’s sugar water.”

“Your soul. Sugar is good for your soul.” Lucas rolled his eyes, and drank the juice. When he had downed the entire glass, Maya grinned, “To the bathroom!” She announced, pointing in the general direction, grabbing Lucas’s hand and galloping off.

Chapter Text

“What are you doing?” Lucas turned, and questioned as they got to the bathroom door.

“Entering the bathroom?” Maya raised her eyebrow, confused by his confusion. He loved when she did that.

“I thought you wanted me to shower?” He asked, trying to ignore her cute face, and focus on the fact that she was invading his space. Again.

“I do.” She agreed.

“I can’t shower if you are in here.” He explained.

“I just need your clothes, so I can put on the laundry.” She reminded. He seemed extra dumb today.

“No.” He shook his head.

“No?” There was the eyebrow again, this time combined with a look of amusement.

“After I shower, I will put on a load.” He said firmly. It was weird she wanted to do his laundry, and he wasn’t going to let her do it.

“Fine crankypants.” She shrugged.

“Good. You can watch tv, or something, and I’ll be out in a minute.” He smiled a little, happy she had conceded.

“Take your time. I’ve got my phone.” She said, pulling it out of her back pocket.

“Ok.” He nodded.

“Ok.” She shook her head, and turned. Like she was going to listen to a word he said.

When she heard the shower turn on, Maya put her phone away, and made her way to Lucas’s room. She opened the door, pushing things out of the way to do so. Jesus. The tidy, put together room she had seen last time was no more. Piles of stuff covered the floor. Laundry, and paperwork covered every square inch. He wasn’t kidding when he said he needed to clean. Sighing, she scooped up the pile of clothes by her feet, and made her way to the almost empty laundry basket in the corner of the room by the window, and desk.

Apparently, the only clothes to make it to the basket were the boxers he wore over his pull up to bed. It took about three minutes to gather all the laundry off the floor and shove it in the basket, or at least in the corner. One that was done, the room looked better. Not truly clean, but better.

The laundry, she discovered, was behind the door next to Lucas’s room. Convenient. She threw on a load, mostly t shirts and underwear, and then found her way to the couch.

The couch is where Lucas found her ten minutes later. He paused before entering the living space, he didn’t want to disturb her. She was on the couch, leaning against the corner, her feet flat on the couch, her head leaning against the back. She looked comfortable and right at home.

“Hey.” He said, breathy, coming around the couch.

“Hey. Feel better?” She asked, looking up as he ran his hand though it wet hair.

“Cleaner. Whatcha doing?" He smiled, popping down next to her.

“Instagram. God do people make their lives look good.” She said,, returning her attention to her feed.

“Yup.” He agreed, then after a moment of just staring at her while she wasn't looking, shook his head and asked, “So. Whats up for the rest of the afternoon.”

“Well, I feel like thai. So I’m thinking I go get thai, and you can study while I’m gone.” She said, still not looking at him.

“That actually sounds nice.” He said, somewhat surprised.

“Good! I shall be back in an hour and a half.” She grinned, hopping up, and leaving before he could really process what just happened.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

True to her word, Maya returned an hour and a half later with an unnecessarily large amount Thai food, and a large backpack.

“Thank god, I’m starving.” Lucas grinned, following her into the kitchen.

“Oh did you want some? That’s awkward I only got enough for myself.” She said setting the bag on the counter, and letting her backpack fall to the floor.

“Cute, you're cute.” Lucas said sarcastically as Maya began unloading the takeout.

“Well of course darling, but what does that have to do with my scallion pancake intake?” She grinned.

“You’re the worst.” Lucas said, following suit and reaching for a pancake.

“I wouldn’t say that to the girl who controls the pancakes if I were you.” Maya said, smacking his hand away, and handing him a plate.

“You’re right. Whats with the backpack?” He questioned as he shoveled pad thai onto his plate with a plastic fork.

“Well yes, I’m always right. The backpack has my sketchpad and pj’s in it. Duh.” Maya answered, loading her plate and not looking at him.

“Pajamas?” He questioned, stopping and staring at her.

“Yeah. I’m sleeping over.” She shrugged as she added fried veggies to her plate.

“No you’re not.” He said firmly, trying to get her full attention.

“Of course I am.” She took a bite of pancake.

“No, no you're not." Maya sighed, looked at the ceiling, and swallowed before turning to and answering him.

“Lucas,” She said drawing out all the syllables, “It’s pouring, and sleeting.”

“Really?” He was genuinely surprised, it had been fine three hours ago.

“Just as I got off the subway.” She nodded, turning back to her dinner and covering it in various sauces.

“Oh.” He said softly.

“Yeah.” She took another bite of pancake.

“It’s early for sleet.” He pondered, going back to filling his own plate.

“It’s cold.” She replied, her mouth still full.

“It is.” He agreed, still overly unsatisfied with this news and unsure of its consequences.

“So I have to stay. Or you’ll be sending me out into the cold, harsh world unprepared.” She held a hand to her heart and feigned weakness.

“You knew that though, didn't you.”

“That we would be hit with a freak storm for the history books? Snow in December and lots of it, how global warming will give us a white Christmas.” Maya recited from a weather report she had heard earlier.

“Maya.” Lucas said her name as if its very sound was a disappointment.

“Actually Huckleberry, you’re lucky to have me. You were completely unprepared for this storm. Without me, you wouldn’t have dinner, or batteries, or the snacks I have in the backpack, or my rousing and stimulating conversational company.” She added.

“Are you saying I might have to listen to you all night, and all day tomorrow?” He questioned, looking at her again.

“Oh Huck, I’m saying you may have the pleasure of having me until Tuesday.” Lucas's eyes widened.

“What?” He demanded.

“Lets watch the grinch!” Maya grinned, taking her plate to the living room.

“Maya!” Lucas yelled as she sat on the floor in front of the couch and turned on the TV.

Chapter Text

       “We can’t sleep in my bed together.” Lucas sighed, standing next to the dresser.

       “I thought we’d already crossed this bridge.” Maya pouted from the bed.

       “That was different. I was sick, and you were,” Lucas searched for the words.

       “Insistent?” She offered.

       “Yeah.” He breathed.

       “Yeah.” She bit her lip and looked down.

       “I mean, it wasn’t a bad thing. I-I liked it. Really. And I’m grateful to you. You took care of me, and you made me feel better.” He didn’t want her to feel bad. He really didn’t. The truth was, he’d loved her sleeping with him. He wished that he could lay with her now. He wanted to. Fuck, he wanted to go to bed every night, and have her be there. He wanted her leg against his, her arm on his chest. Wanted her to be safely tucked against his body. He wanted to feel her warmth, to smell her hair. He wanted to lay next to her. More than pretty much anything else, he wanted to lay next to her. Which is why he couldn’t.

       “So why can’t you just not argue, and lay next to me now?” She looked up at him then, up through those lashes.

       “I’m not sick today.” It wasn’t an explanation, but it was all he could come up with.

       “So?” She pressed.

       “So it’s not okay today.” Because wanting her the way he did wasn’t okay.

       “Neither is you sleeping on the couch! That defeats the purpose of me making you get rest. I might as well just go home. ” She sighed, throwing the blankets off herself, and sitting up.

       "I’ll sleep fine. And it turns out, I like having you here. So I’d rather you stay than go, but if you want to you can.” He scratched the back of his head, and refused to make eye contact.

       “Well I like sleeping with you, and I’d rather you sleep with me in your bed then sleep on the couch.” She tried.

       “Its not appropriate Maya.” His hand fell as he shook his head.

       “I don’t care!” She groaned, throwing her hands in the air.

       “I know, but I do.” He met her gaze again, and her face softened.

       “I won’t be able to sleep in here without you.” She whispered.

       “Yes you will.” His voice dropping to match hers, the air suddenly becoming heavier.

       “No I won’t.” Maya settled back, and pulled the blankets back over herself with a pout.

       “Goodnight Maya, sleep tight.” Lucas smiled softly, and flicked off the light, leaving Maya in the glow of the lamp as he left.


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 

       “Maya?” Lucas rubbed his eyes, and looked over the side of the couch trying to confirm what he thought he saw.  “What are you doing?”

       “Sleeping.” Maya said from beneath him, her back turned.

       “Why are you on the floor?” He questioned, and propped himself up on his elbow.

       “I couldn’t sleep without you. I told you.” She sighed, and rolled over to face him. She was awfully beautiful looking up at him in the moonlight, and streetlight coming in through the kitchen window.

       “But you can sleep on the floor?” He sighed.

       “I can hear you breathe from here.” She said as if were the most obvious thing in the whole world.

       “You’re ridiculous.” He mumbled.

       “You're the one who wouldn’t stay with me.” She whined.

       “Go back to bed.” He sighed.

       “Only if you come with me.” Her face was serious, her voice not whining,just firm.

       “Maya,” He could have said more, but he’d already said it, and she didn’t want to hear it.

       “Then I’m staying here.” Maya wiggled down under her blanket, and closed her eyes.

       “Seriously?” Lucas questioned, knowing he was losing.

       “It’s better than being alone.” And with that Lucas had lost. She was willing to sleep on the floor just to be with him.

       “Come on.” Lucas said throwing the quilt off himself, sitting up, grabbing his pillow, and offering a hand to Maya.

       “Are you gonna stay?” She questioned.

       “Yeah.” He nodded. Maya smiled, and allowed him to pull her off the ground. Maya didn’t let go of his hand as he led her down the hall, around the corner, and into his room. Only when the had to climb into bed from their separate sides did she release his hand. The two climbed into bed, Lucas once again attempting to stay on his own side, with his own space, and Maya wholeheartedly ignoring that and climbing halfway on top of him.

       “Thank you.” Maya whispered after minutes of lying comfortably in silence.

Chapter Text

       “Don’t go.” Maya mumbled as Lucas pulled away, and climbed out into the dark.  

       “I have to pee.” Lucas said from too far away for Maya’s liking.

       “Stay here.” She whined.

       “Maya I really have to pee. I’ll come back.” Lucas promised.

       “Hurry.” She sighed.

       “Okay.” Lucas agreed, hitting something in the dark, and cursing under his breath.

       “What are you doing?” Maya questioned.

       “N-Nothing.” Lucas stuttered, still fumbling around the  room.

       “You said you would come back to bed.” Maya sat up, and patted around for the lamp cord, already knowing what Lucas was doing.

       “I will. I just need a second.” Lucas said as Maya flicked the light on, and illuminated the room in a soft yellow light that made Lucas wince.

       “You are already wearing a pullup.” Maya said to his back as he stood, red handed, hand in his underwear drawer, gripping a dry diaper.

       “I, I,” Lucas tried to come up with an excuse, but he had none, and he knew she’d see through it anyway.

       “Is it wet?” Maya questioned. Lucas’s heart sank, and his face fell, and he had the sudden urge to cry, which was strange because despite their previous sleepovers events, he really wasn’t a crier. “Don’t look like that, come here.” Maya instructed, sitting up straighter, and crossing her legs. “Come here.” She repeated, more firmly this time. Head down, he followed her  instruction. “You don’t have to look so sad. It’s not your fault.” She said, trying to look up at him, his eyes fixed on the floor.

       “It is.” He mumbled, shifting his hips in the soggy fixture.

       “It’s okay.” She said with the same firmness she’d called him over with.

       “I want to take it off.” Lucas confessed, his eyes still fixed on his toes.

       “Take it off.” Maya instructed, Lucas turned, “No. Here.” She added before he could take more than a step.

       “I can’t take it off here.” He said, finally meeting her gaze.

       “Yes you can. And you're going too.” Maya said evenly.

       “No.” Lucas shook his head.

       “Then come back to bed.” She conceded.

       “Maya,” He whined, not really sure how to beg to leave when she really wasn’t stopping him.

       “No.” She took the dry pull up from his hand. “Change it here or come back to bed.”

       “There are more in the drawer.” Lucas said softly.

       “But you're not going to get one are you?” It was more of a statement than a question, but Lucas answered anyway.

       “No.”

       “Good.” Lucas stared at her for a moment before turning away from her, and inhaling deeply. After a long, long pause, he slid his flannel pajama bottoms down his legs slowly, and stepped out of them. He then leant over, picked the pants up, folded them, and laid them on the nightstand.

       Maya kept her eyes fixed on his bottom the whole time. His Kenny Chesney t-shirt hit the very top of the pull up. It was too small really, but it was one of his favourites. As of this moment, it was Maya's too, because the shirt did nothing to cover the soggy, droopy pull up hanging between Lucas’s legs.

       After placing his pants on the nightstand Lucas took a moment to gather himself before turning back to Maya, and sticking his right hand out to her.

       “Take that one off.” She said evenly. Lucas bit his lip, and took a slow breath.

       “Okay.” He said quietly. Maya’s eyes widened as he put his left hand on the front of the padding and used his right to undo the tabs. As soon as they were undone the diaper dropped and swung between his legs.

       “Woah.” Maya breathed.

       “C’I have that one.” Lucas questioned, and for the first time wearing a diaper, he was looking right at her.

       “Okay.” The only problem was, she didn’t move, she just sat, and stared at the diaper hanging between Lucas’s legs.  

       “Maya, my butt’s cold.” Lucas said softly.

       “I wanna see.” Maya said quietly, eyes flicking up to his.

       “My butt?” Lucas questioned, his cheeks heating up.

       “All of it.” Maya said honestly.

       “It’s inappropriate.” Lucas whispered, his gaze dropping to his toes again.

       “I know.” Maya said quickly, her words a confession.

       “Okay.” Lucas found himself agreeing before he even knew the words were coming out of his mouth. With a deep breath, he pulled the diaper away, and let it fall into the waste paper bin next to the night table.

       Lucas held his breath as Maya stared, her eyes fixed on the limp dick between his legs. 

       “Can I have the new one?” He questioned. His stomach sucked in, hips and hand wriggling in discomfort.

       “I wanna put it on.” Maya said suddenly, looking up at him.

       “You want to put my,” he couldn’t bring himself to say it, “You wanna put it on me?”

       “Yeah.” She answered before Lucas had finished his last word.

       “I don’t think-” He tried to say again how this was wrong. He was ready to say that he take it all back if she would. He’d forget it all.

       “Please?” She whispered, her voice breaking, her eyes big. She was begging him to say yes. Begging him to validate her wants, her desire, that feeling in the deep of her belly.

       “Okay.” He whispered back. And just like that, he knew he couldn’t forget. He couldn’t forget how good it was to sleep next to her. How content it felt be in silence with her. Couldn’t forget how very safe, and strong, and comfortable she was.

       Maya climbed out of the bed and kneeled in front of the boy. He refused to look at her, squirming as she attempted to open the contraption.

       “This one's different.” Maya commented, her voice matter of fact in an attempt to keep him comfortable. She was looking up at him, trying to catch his eye. He couldn’t look at her. Not like this. Not with her, on her knees, not in that outfit. Not when he was- he couldn’t look at her. Instead, he sighed, and looked at the ceiling.

       “I- its a, now I hafta.” He took a deep breath.  “Its a diaper. The other ones were pullups. I hafta wear the diapers now cause the pullups were,” He bit his lip and looked down the. His face contorted like he was eating a lemon, “leaking.”

       “So you should lie down on the bed.” She said in that same authoritative voice that had convinced him to go with her ideas in the past.

       “I can just tape the sides and step into it.” He explained quickly, he was wringing his hands now. “Sometimes I have to tighten it if I do it that way, but, I don’t know.”

       “But you feel like a baby laying down to tape it up?” She said, so he didn't have to.

       “Yeah.” At this point, he’d almost started shaking. It was too much. It was all too much. They were on an edge here, and whatever happened next. Whatever happened next he couldn’t take back.

       “Will you lay down for me?” The was she spoke, the was her voice changed. She was asking if he’d do this for her. As if this whole thing was, some sort of weird, wrong, twisted favor for her. But, but what struck him hardest? Yes. Yes he would do this for her. Yes. He wanted to do it for her. He wanted to because it was what she wanted. He wanted to because it was what he wanted. He wanted -

       “Yeah. Okay.” He nodded.

       He stepped around her, and climbed onto the bed. It was somehow worse lying down, even more exposed. Maybe it was an animal thing? Here was defenseless, at least standing up he could run. Now she had all the power.

       She felt it too. She could physically see how fast his chest moved, could see him clenching and unclenching his fingers, could see way his belly hollowed out.

       She moved slowly. She came to her feet slowly, and she moved towards him slowly.

       His breath caught as she pushed his legs apart to move between them.

       She smiled, just a little, when she caught his eye. It wasn’t her usual smile. Her usual smile was full of mischief. This smile, it was soft. It was comforting. It was just enough, so he knew this would be okay.

       She laid the diaper on the bed between his legs. “Lift your bum up.” She instructed, eyes fixed on her work. He followed her direction, and she slid the diaper into place. He lowered himself until he felt his ass touch the soft cotton, paused, for just a split second, then relaxed into it. With a satisfied, silent little nod, Maya flipped the front of the diaper into place, and reached around to do up the tapes. She was efficient, and the diaper fit securely. Still he shivered when her fingers grazed his hips as she retrieved the tapes.

       He watched her the whole time, and when he saw her fingers go to make sure the little piece in the crook of his crotch was turned out, he grabbed her wrist. It wasn’t a tight grab, just a warning. She pulled away.

       “Let me finish.” Her voice stern as she looked him in the eye, daring him to tell her he’d had enough. When further protest never came, she nodded, and refocused on the diaper.

       The noise he made as her pointer finger slipped under the diaper to fix that little, but very important guard against leaking was somewhere between a groan and a sigh. Maya made no outward acknowledgement of the outburst, but her heart swelled. She was disappointed when he bit his lip as she did the left leg. Though, he did look good doing that too.

       “There. Perfect.” She said with a smile, a palm resting on each of his thighs. He had no response. Hell he had no words. He was just getting by at breathing.

       “Let’s get back to bed.” She said, already pulling the comforter back and climbing back into her spot. Lucas sat up, and had begun to stand when her little hand wrapped around his wrist.

       “Pants off.” She clarified.

       “But-” He started to argue, she cut him off.

       “Are they really necessary now?” He had no argument for that. And beyond that, he had no argument left in him. He paused for a moment, then changed his direction and climbed back into bed as Maya flicked off the light, the pull cord bouncing as she released it. He settled in as he had the first night, stiffly on his back.

       That didn’t last. As soon as the light was off, Maya was right back against him. Her head tucked against his shoulder, making him wrap his arm around her. Her leg thrown over his bare thighs and diaper covered crotch. Her hand reached up and she ran her fingers down his cheek before settling her hand on his chest.

“       You are so beautiful.” She whispered, her eyes closed, already falling back asleep.

Chapter Text

“What- what,” Lucas groaned as he awoke the next morning. His shoulder was stiff, and the rain was loud.

Hmm shhh.” Maya mumbled, rubbing her head on his chest, eyes still closed.

“Fuck.” Lucas said suddenly, the night coming back to him.

“To tired, maybe later.” Maya mumbled, pulling the comforter up to cover her face.

“Maya.” And there he was again, saying her name like it disappointed him.

“Shhhh. Sleep.” Maya instructed, ignoring the hurt his tone caused.

“Maya. Maya let me up.” Lucas shifted, trying to wriggle his way out of her embrace, and out of bed.

“No. No you can’t leave yet.” Her hand gripped his tshirt, and her leg was taught over his own. She wasn’t letting go. “Maya,”

“No. You can’t leave until you breath.” She was making it up as she went along, but a sudden burst of, god, she didn’t know, something, had made her hold on when he tried to move. She wasn’t backing down now.

“I am breathing.” He dodged. Why was he always fucking doing that? Why was he always pretending he didn’t know what she was saying when she knew he understood.

Of course his lungs were fucking working. Yeah, yeah, the oxygen was going in, the carbon dioxide out. His heart was beating, his brain working. Sure. If he was gonna be like that, yeah, he was breathing. Except, she could almost smell burning metal as his brain worked in overdrive. He was coming up with a plan. He was gonna get her out of his bed. Out of his room, and slowly but surely push her to the outskirts of his life. They were going to become pleasantries friends and nothing else. She could tell. She knew this was too much for him. Well fuck that. It was too much, and not enough, and perfect, and so bad, and-

“Not really.” She exclaimed, a little unhinged, even she could tell. She took a breath herself. “You're freaking out. It’s like, when the sun comes up, you panic.”

“I don’t see any sun today.” He scoffed, completely ignoring what she was saying. He was listening to her words and nothing else.

“Then there's no need to panic.” Her voice was just as flippant as his. He rolled his eyes. “Just breath and lie here. Just be here, with me, for just a minute.”

“Maya,” He was ready to defend himself, ready to say whatever mean thing he had to to get up.

“Stop.” Or, he thought he was. “Stop saying my name like that.” She said angrily, cutting him off again.

“Like what?” His voice was hard, and he looked her straight in the eye.

“Like it hurts.” She never blinked, even when her eyes got glassy. She held his gaze, and it didn’t take much to break him. He looked away almost immediately. It was too hard to see her face like that. He’d been ready to say something cruel, he really had. But, he was only ready to do it on purpose. Hurting her by accident was a whole new thing. And it sucked. And it made his chest hurt.

“Okay.” He said softly. “Okay.” Maya looked away then. He thought for sure he’d fucked it up for good, but she didn’t pull away. Instead she dug her head back into his chest and hung on tighter. “Okay.” He whispered again.

 

 

 

“Do you hate me?” She questioned later, as they laid in silence. Neither of them knew how long they'd been that way, awake, but not really. Not speaking or acknowledging each others presence, at the same time, holding each other as if they may fly apart if they loosened a finger. She didn’t move, didn’t try to look at him. She, she couldn’t look at him.

“What?” He questioned, surprised by both her voice and the question.

“Do you hate me?” She repeated evenly, still not looking.

“Why would I hate you? Why would you ask that?” He was staring at her now, her dark eyebrows and long lashes preventing him from seeing her eyes from his vantage point.

“Because I made you do that last night. Because I keep showing up. Because I make you do things you think are wrong.” She said softly. He sighed. He hated that she would think that way.

“I don’t hate you. I couldn’t hate you. If I hate anyone, it’s me.” She looked up at him them, and he was taken aback by how beautiful she was.

“Don’t hate you.” Her voice stern, and forehead wrinkled as she spoke. “I love you. Don’t hate you.”

“Okay.” He said softly. He couldn't argue with her. It’s not that he didn’t have an argument. There were so many things he hated about himself, but, still, he couldn’t argue with her. He had the strangest feeling that it would hurt her if she had to try to convince him he was wrong.

“Good.” She nodded. “Now,” she added in that same stern voice, “I would like to drink cocoa and watch Lilo and Stitch and snuggle with you.” He couldn’t help but grin at that. Leave to Maya to pull out the most perfect, happy idea from a fog of heaviness.

“That sounds wonderful.” He agreed, and after a moment he added, “Maya.” It was her to smile then, which she did, her face buried in his chest. The was no sadness when he said her name this time. There was no looming, no heaviness. She found she quite loved the way he said it this time, and that she’d be okay hearing him say it over and over again.

Chapter Text

Three Disney movies, two piles of whipped cream covered pancakes, and one Elvis singalong later, the heaviness in the air had cleared. 

“Ugh,” Maya groaned, pushing her hair out of her face.

“What?” Lucas asked, turning to watch her. 

“Greasy.” She said with a grimace, “I need a shower.” 

“Do you want one?” He asked, clicking off the tv.

“Mr. Modest himself would let me take a shower?” Maya questioned, her voice fake and pompous as she gathered her hair into a pile on her head. 

“It’s not like we’d be taking a shower together. It just looks like you're gonna be here a while, and if you are you should be comfortable.” Lucas shrugged, now afraid to make eye contact less he blush. Why did he have to bring up showing together? Now the thought of her in the shower with him around was running through his head and he couldn’t stop it

“In that case, I would love a shower.” She said happily, throwing the blanket off her lap and hopping up. 

“Now?” Lucas questioned, startled by her sudden movement after a day of lounging. 

“Yeah. I’m like super gross.” She said with a quirked eyebrow, snatching the bowl of carrots they had been snacking on off his lap and walking away. 

“Alright.” He chuckled, following her to the bathroom. 

 

“Um, this towel is clean and you can use anything in the shower,” Lucas explained as he pulled a gray towel out of the closet and placed it on the counter. One hand came to rest on the back of his neck as he stood awkwardly, feeling like he was supposed to say something else but not knowing what it was.
“Killer killer.” Maya grinned, reaching in and turning on the shower. 

“Alright.” Lucas sighed, nodding once and beginning to turn for the door. 

“You sure you don’t wanna shower with me?” Maya questioned with a smile as she pulled down her leggings. 

“Very funny.” Lucas rolled his eyes as he headed for the door. 

“If only it was a joke,” Maya called, hopping out of her pants as he walked away. 

“Maya!” Lucas groaned loudly as the door he’d pulled closed slammed behind him. 

 

“I feel like a brand new girl.” Maya sighed as she entered Lucas’s bedroom thirty minutes later. 

“I’m glad.” Lucas hummed from his spot at the desk. The lamp was on and the desktop was covered in papers.

“What have you been up to?” Maya questioned as she fluffed her wet hair in the mirror. 

“Physics.” Lucas said, scribbling down one last note before closing the book. 

“Gross.” Maya said with a face, turning to go for her bag. 

“Yeah, well-” Lucas began, turning to face her, “where are your clothes?” He interrupted himself, eyes wide at the sight of the wet girl in the short towel before him. 

“In my bag. These,” Maya explained, “Are dirty. I wasn’t gonna put them back on.” She said as she tossed the pile of clothes in her arms onto a pile of Lucas’s dirty clothes. “Not my fault you were in here.” She shrugged.

“I’ll go.” Lucas said quickly as Maya squatted down to her backpack. 

“Don’t bother.” She said pushing her hair back from her face and retrieving a clean pair of underwear. 

“It’s-” Lucas began. 

“Not appropriate.” Maya cut him off, pulling out a t-shirt, “I got it. Except you didn’t even notice until you stopped reading. You keep reading, I’ll get dressed. Whether or not you want to look is up to you.” Lucas bit his lip as she spoke, working so hard to keep his gaze on the very top of her hear. Not even her face, her face was too beautiful, but the literal top of her head where her hair parted. The way she was sitting, with her knees bent like that, her legs were on display. The towel had ridden up so it was tucked just around her butt and sat low on her boobs. He was grateful the backpack was between them because the way her legs spread -

“Maya,” He said breathlessly, a tone she mistook for exasperated. 

“Up to you Huck.” She shrugged, pulling out a pair of pajama pants and standing up. 

“Okay.” Lucas conceded. Even with her back turned, he didn’t want to risk standing up. He’d grown increasingly uncomfortable in his own gray sweatpants since she’d left the shower. Instead, he tucked himself and his chair back under the desk and ran through his physics vocab and formulas. It didn’t help. 

Lucas didn’t look. Not this time. Maya couldn’t lie, she was a little disappointed. Lucas couldn’t read a single word until she left to brush her hair. It was too hard to focus, knowing that all he had to do was turn around. Fuck did he want her to turn around. She’s all but dared him to turn around. He knew he shouldn’t, it wasn’t gentlemanly to do. Though nothing he wanted to do to or with her was gentlemanly.