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Finding Your Other Half

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You knew you had a soulmate since you were very young.

It was common knowledge that soulmates felt each other’s deep emotions, and you could feel yours almost constantly.

Your soulmate (it was a he, you could just feel it) experienced deep emotions all the time when you were younger. But this wasn’t necessarily good for you.

It scared you, because your soulmate was feeling mainly fear and frustration and anger.

It frightened you so much that you would often huddle by yourself in elementary school, curling into a ball in an attempt to squish the terrible feelings that utterly consumed you.

And they wouldn’t go away. They would fade sometimes till they were just a nagging presence in the back of your mind, but they would still be there.

You had come to accept it now.

The feelings were a part of you now.

It was also common knowledge that the feelings would intensify the closer you were to your soulmate. You didn’t give this piece of information much thought until recently.

As you walked home from your new job, you passed a house, seemingly normal, but oddly dark.

When you passed over the 4th panel in the sidewalk, a dark surge of desperation cascaded over you, filled with panic and anxiety and a deep-set depression.

A strangled cry tumbling from your lips, you stumbled and crashed onto your hands and knees, scraping them on the rough concrete, your eyes filled with tears, first at the pain you felt deep inside you, second at the plain sympathy you felt for your soulmate, who was very so much in agony at the moment. You waited, knowing the moment would pass, but it never did. After a minute or two, the feelings still strong as ever, you gritted your teeth and crawled over to the grass in front of the house in an attempt to lessen the strain on your knees and palms.

You collapsed on the grass, breathing heavily, and wrung your hands near your chest. There was only one possible solution to this. “Hah… Hah… Gotta…”

You had planned for this before, and you tugged your purse to you, slowly reaching inside to grasp the wrapper of your favorite candy bar. You painfully tore it off and took a substantial bite, letting the sweetness overflow in your mouth. It melted your feelings, and you let it fill you with a pleasant satisfaction.

The bad emotions were almost gone now, enough for you to stand shakily to your feet and wobble home. Strangely, the feelings seemed to fade even more as you walked further from the house.

The next day, you were more cautious as you approached the same house. This time you searched for your soulmate’s emotions ahead of time. Sure enough, you recognized the tug of depression in the background of your mind. Determined not to collapse like yesterday, you pulled another candy bar from your purse and began eating it, quickly crossing the area in front of the house and that one spot on the 4th panel of the sidewalk.

You made it, though not without significant struggle. Your legs threatened to fold when the overwhelming sadness hit you, but you fought it off with desperate thoughts of the sweet comfort in your mouth.


It was another terrible day for Saeyoung. He was working his ass off doing dirty work of the lowest quality. Today, he got a call from his boss.

“Yeah, boss?”

“A… special client has come in. You want the job?”

He had to take. Need the money.

Just TAKE it.

“Sure. Send me the details.”

“I’ll email you an encoded email. Won’t be a problem, right?”

A flash of anger. Frustration. The emotions flowed from him easily now. Easily covered up.

“Nope. Go ahead.”

But not to his soulmate.

Saeyoung sometimes felt guilty thinking about it. How his soulmate was getting the blunt end of the stick. He barely felt anything from her. And, yes, he felt she was a girl.

But the guilt was nothing compared to the overflowing negativity he battled every day, and today was no different.

In fact, it was worse.

He got the email from his boss and began decoding it. Though he was only assisting the computer in completing the job, he felt a strange sense that his boss was taunting him. Challenging him. And it pissed him off.

Saeyoung clenched his fists with a bang on his desk, making the mountain of Dr. Pepper cans next to his monitor jump a couple centimeters. He gritted his teeth, letting the seething anger boil into an endless frustration.

“The asshole. Challenging me. Just wastes my time… ugh…”

And then he felt it. The strongest pull in his heart he’d ever felt.

Is this…

Sympathy flooded through him for an instant, but then pain, bright and bloody, brought him back to his previous thoughts.

My soulmate wouldn’t care about me… all I’ve brought her is pain.

The anger and frustration were joined by fresh sadness. Layer upon layer of desperation.

Saeyoung attempted to drag his thoughts back to the computer, which was blinking, telling him it had finished its task. His fingers wavered over the keyboard, knowing what to do, but waiting for his command.

He never gave it.

There was a strange, warm feeling filling his body. Saeyoung couldn’t give it a name… he’d never felt it before. It lingered on his tongue, curved his lips upward in an unfamiliar sensation, pulled at his stomach and wet his tongue. He basked in the warmth, letting it fill his cheeks and settle in his heart, clearing it of all-

And it was gone. And the others were back, harder than ever.



Lately you had been experiencing a new feeling from your soulmate. It was plain, wild want. For some reason, whenever your thoughts strayed to him, whoever he was, the desire would intensify, no matter where you were. By this point you had deduced that he must live in the house you passed by every day. As the leaves fell and air froze, you came up with a plan.

The wrapped box lay heavy in your arms as you walked the usual path on December 25th. You stopped in front of the dark house, took a deep breath for courage, and walked up to the front door.

Saeyoung was having a terrible day as usual. The job, which he usually would have finished by now, wasn’t making much progress. Maybe this was due to his distractions? He took another desperate gulp of Dr. Pepper, along with a mouthful of Honey Butter chip crumbs. He tossed the empty bag over his shoulder.

He glanced at the time on the corner of his screen. It’s about that time…

His doorbell rang.

What…? The sound jerked him from his stupor. He had come to expect the tingle of contentment that came every day at this time, but this time… it felt different.

He jerked away from his computer for the first time that week, his movements robotic, his joints stiff. Taking off his glasses, he rubbed them with his shirt and stumbled through the dark, kicking a couple chip bags to the side.

As he approached the door, he felt a wave of nervousness. Don’t tell me…

He yanked the door open and came face to face with a short, pale girl. Her golden brown hair hung barely to her ears which were decorated with small, blue sapphires that highlighted her eyes. In her hands was a box, wrapped in red and green striped paper and accentuated with a large, silver bow.

Saeyoung was lost for words, drowning in the sudden sparkle of pure joy that sprung through the bond.

“Hi!” the girl spoke. Her azure eyes were bright. Too bright…

“H-hi…” Saeyoung mumbled, struggling against the overwhelming emotions. His soulmate was standing right in front of him. Then, an emotion of his own bubbled to the surface. She was beautiful, and she was here. The one he had hurt all these years… And she was smiling at him. She doesn’t… hate me?

“Can I come in?”

Saeyoung’s eyes widened and he took a step back unconsciously. Then he mumbled to himself. Of course she’d want to come in. Why else would she come here. He opened the door wider and nodded.

The girl took a seat at the couch in the living room and looked up Saeyoung hesitantly. “This… is for you.” She offered him the present.

Saeyoung lost his breath. His amber eyes were locked in the endless maze of her cerulean ones, and he couldn’t bear to find his way out. The rush of affection that seemed to originate from her poured over him in waves. Then he felt a brush of anxiety that came, not from him, but from the girl in front of him, and he snapped awake. No longer would he let his soulmate feel the negative emotions he did.

He took the several quick steps necessary to settle onto the couch next to her. She gasped as the plush material sank under his weight, bouncing her slightly up and down. All the little sounds she made… All the looks and sighs… Saeyoung was already beginning to treasure them.

“Thank you,” he said, and bravely brushed her arm with his fingertips. The spark that sprang between him and the girl was chilling, yet hot hot HOT at the same time. He jerked away, the present forgotten on the floor. Though their skin wasn’t touching, their gazes met like it was natural to be connected in some sort of way.

The girl smiled, and it was the purest thing Saeyoung had ever seen. “Happy holidays,” she whispered. Then she hesitantly took his hand. “I’m Asya. Your soulmate.”

Saeyoung gulped, blushing heavily as he felt the surge of love and affection through their direct touch. “I’m S-Saeyoung,” he stumbled. Ugh! How awkward… So smooth, Luciel.


You couldn’t take it anymore. You needed to touch him… Feel him. Your soulmate. The one you had always been connected to, but too far away to comfort. Your eyes took on a devilish glare and you sprang at him, wrapping your arms around his neck and burying your face in his chest. At first Saeyoung tensed, and a pang of worry exploded in both of your chests. What if you weren’t… compatible? The thought scared you, and you began to pull away, an apology on your lips.

And then his arms were locked around you, resting on your lower back. His face was burrowed in your hair, his lips tickling your forehead. For the first time in your entire life you felt the nagging negativity in the back of your mind disappear. Your whole being was flooded with joy, comfort, and utter satisfaction.

“Hah… Saeyoung,” you gasped against his neck, your breath hot on his skin, which burned with a magical fire where you two touched. “Saeyoung, it feels… Ah…”

Saeyoung clenched his arms around you tighter, and it never seemed to be enough. You needed to be closer, to feel more of him. As close as you were, you both knew what was going to happen before it did.

You lifted your head the same time he tilted his down, and your lips met in a spectacular burst of fireworks.

The kiss glowed with sincere, pleasant bliss. But in your mind, sparks popped, blowing heatwaves down your spine and bombs of color behind your eyelids. Saeyoung gasped against your lips and his breath was sweet against your face. Like honey. You tugged his lower lip with your teeth, desiring that sweet honey taste.

He kissed you like you were water in the middle of the desert, gulping and sucking and needing more, oh more.

Then a burning sensation grew in both your chests, and you were forced to part. Your face was flushed, your breathing hard, desperate, and Saeyoung was a mirror image of you.

“Asya…” he murmured. “I… I love you.”

“I love you too,” you whispered, setting your forehead against his, feeling his thoughts. “For forever.”


Saeyoung opened his present and was met with the pastel blue and purple of a Blu-Ray set. You snickered and told him to flip it over.

“ユーリ!!! On Ice?”

“You have a Blu-Ray player, right? Let’s marathon it!”

You spent the rest of the night laughing and cuddling at the perfect Viktuuri moments, beginning to end. Saeyoung held you as you cried over the ending, his lips kissing your tears away, which brought on another reckless make-out session, though it eventually melted into sweet, loving tastes of each other.