“Maeglin…hey Maeglin…” Idril’s sweet voice gained the young teen’s attention. Quite shocked that she was speaking to him, he closed the book he was reading and gave her full attention.
“Is there something you need?” Maeglin responded, timidly as always.
“Tuor and I are heading to a party tonight. We wanted to know if you were up to going with us.” She drifted for a second before continuing. “I know you and I got off on a wrong start and…I’m sorry if I’ve been bitter to you. After the stuff that happened with your mom and dad, I know things are hard. So maybe getting out of the house will cheer you up?”
Maeglin’s heart skipped several beats at that moment before being filled with the utmost compassion. He could hardly believe his ears, he could hardly believe that Idril was being kind to him.
“Sure…let me get ready…thanks Idril….”
There had been a voice in the back of his head, screaming at him to be wary. But naïve and just eager to gain Idril’s attention and friendship, he ignored it. After all that had happened in his life over the past few months, after the pain he’d felt, perhaps things were going to change for the better.
Yet still, that wind of caution rose higher and higher with every second that passed, and Maeglin was a fool for not adhering to it.
He should have never gotten into the car with them, no matter how much they told him he’d love the party. Nor should he have taken that blasted drink from Idril, no matter how good she swore it was, for the moment young Maeglin took a sip, his world crashed. The lights flickered, and his stomach churned and before he knew it, he was on the ground.
Disoriented, he called out to Idril and Tuor only to hear them laughing and near seconds later, his vision went blank.
Now when Maeglin woke hours later, he vaguely remembered feeling sick to his stomach, and perhaps he tried to go to the bathroom. However, that was his mistake, for he did not know this house, nor anything about the others at the party. If his own cousin drugged him, then he should have known these people would not have been so civil.
And Maeglin learned that the hard way the moment he stumbled upstairs. There were those lurking in the shadows, eager to have their own kind of twisted fun that night as well, and a drugged Maeglin was a perfect target for such party goers. He tried to fight back when a pair of larger hands took hold of hm, he tried to run when he felt the cold touch of another upon his skin. But his body would not react the way he wanted it to, his could not scream for help or fight for to break free. He only muttered no…Over and over again to a person who failed to listen to him; to a person who took his pride and innocence.
Currently, Maeglin sat leaned against the wall of an alley way. The second the drug had worn off, and he regained his movement, he crawled from under his drunk assaulter and fixed his torn clothes as much as he possibly could. After that, the young teen climbed out of the window and made it to his current location now.
In all truth, Maeglin did not know what to think.
He knew that for the most part, he was still in shock. The bitterness and anger towards Idril and Tuor would come later but for now, simply pain and confusion.
His body hurt in ways he knew not possible. Both on the inside and outside, and he wondered for a second, if all people who had gone through what he’d just gone through felt this. It wasn’t simply a soreness that made it difficult to stand, but a numbness that left him angry at himself.
If only he listened to that damned voice in his head! Why did he ignore it? He knew in his heart, that something was odd about Idril’s invitation. She absolutely hated him, for reasons he knew not. Since the day he’d come, from the first moment he offered her a broken smile, she hated him.
So why would she bring him somewhere where he’d be safe, and out of harm’s way? Why did he trust her?
The next logical question would be, why did she do this to him? And quite frankly, Maeglin didn’t want to answer that. For even if he hated someone as much as Idril loathed him, he would not wish such a fate upon them. To lose complete control of your own body while having another take it by force was a punishment that none deserved. For at that moment, the deed left Maeglin disgusted with himself, and such a feeling of self-loathing, no one deserved to carry.
Maeglin groaned in slight pain, and hugged his knees closer to his chest.
What do I do now…do I go back…do I call my mom….?
As quickly as he suggested the latter to himself, he thought otherwise. There was no way he could tell his mother about this, for this would be another problem to add to her already hectic stack. She sent Maeglin to Turgon’s house because she’d run out of options…because now, her life was also in turmoil. She was dealing with Eöl, who was gravely ill and in need of care. There was absolutely no way Maeglin could return to her, not in this broken state. He did not want to force her to care for him, when she was already breaking her back to care for his father.
Yet, Maeglin had already made up his mind that he would never go back to Idril, Tuor or that house. After what Idril put him through that night, he feared there was more in store. The mere thought of what else she could do, sent shivers down his spine.
I’m alone…? What can I do...what will I do….?
While running away seemed like his only option, Maeglin had no money to support himself. In fact he had nothing. No food, and only the ripped clothes on his back. And with the changing weather, he’d be lucky if he made it a day without getting extremely ill.
As the young teen attempted to find a solution to his problems, an aching weight fell upon his chest at the same time. It was as if some type of sadness engulfed his body, feeling him with nothing but dread and dismay. He had nowhere to go, and no one to turn to.
Months and months of emotional distress and agony seemed to take their toll on both his mind and body, and unknowingly, Maeglin began to stand.
He’d be lying to himself if he said he hadn’t contemplated this very moment before. If there were some nights when this foreign pressure of sadness and agony, did not leave his heart. Yet those nights, he told himself that things would take a positive turn, that his father would get better, and his mother would come to take him home.
But that night, he couldn’t see a way out of this. He already felt broken beyond repair. And what was the point if his own kin couldn’t even help him? It will be better this way…for you…for everyone… Maeglin subconsciously told himself, as he now absently walked a few steps down the vacant side walk, and into the street.
That night, there weren’t a lot of cars. However, the cars that drove by were fast. Unyielding, he knew they would not stop for a figure standing idly in the road. And this way, things would be quick. Yes, he’d feel pain at first but seconds later he’d be relieved of it.
And as Maeglin saw a pair of headlights getting closer and closer at an immeasurable speed, followed by the drowning sound of a horn, he closed his eyes and offered a little smile. Soon things would be over.
However, the young teen jumped when he heard the painful screech of the breaks, followed by a car skidding to a stop. Rather abruptly, and angrily, a tall man opened the door and stepped out.
“Are you an idiot or something? Use the side…hey…” His voice lowered as he made eye contacted with disheveled Maeglin.
“I’m…I’m sorry…I was just trying to make it across.” Though the lie was evident in his voice, the man kept a rather calm demeanor when he responded to Maeglin.
“Do you need me to take you home?” He asked, only to be met with a silent answer. So, he tried another question. “Do you have a home…?”
“No.” Maeglin answered before he could think, yet, there was no point trying to muster up another response. So again, he spoke. “I don’t have a home.”
“Do you need a place to stay for a while?” The man crossed his arms. “I live a few hours from here but—”
Maeglin nodded. “I would be grateful…if I could…stay with you.” He didn’t know what to say or when to stop, but perhaps this was better than his original plan. Perhaps some force of nature was giving him another chance to start over, to leave whatever awful pain he had behind. “It doesn’t matter how far away.”
“Alright then” The man approached Maeglin, and led him to the passenger’s seat.
The young teen crawled into the car in silence, listening to the engine as they pulled off. He was tired, but couldn’t bring himself to sleep, so he stared ahead at the dark road.
“Hey um…can I ask for your name? Also how old are you…you look a little young to be out here…”
“My name is…Maeglin and…I’m twenty.”
“Alright Maeglin. We’ll be at my place in a few hours.” And with that, Maeglin nodded, now feeling a little bit more rested than before.