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Lipstick is the new sexy

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“Irene, what in the world is that?”


Molly stared with wide eyes, disbelieve and confusion clearly visible. Her mouth had fallen open while she pointed in Irene's direction.


Irene turned to face hear, handing her the item and suppressing a laugh as Molly's eyes got even wider.


“No way! Where did you get this?”


She was still staring at the lipstick, the first signs of amusement in her voice. Irene smiled brightly, getting the lipstick back and adding more color to her lips.


“Amazon, you can get a whole box of them, different colors.”


She looked in the mirror, pleased with her work and put the cap back on before dropping the lipstick in her bag.


“And how did you even find it? Just googled ' penis shaped lipstick' into the search bar?”


“Don't be silly. I saw a photo on Instagram and then just clicked the link.”


Irene smiled, grabbing her bag and coat and heading out the flat, wrapping her arm around Molly's shoulder.


“Do I even want to know who you are following on there.”


Molly sighed, shaking her head as she followed Irene to the restaurant. Seriously, lipstick shaped as a penis, the world really was going insane.


“They look pretty good and the colors aren't bad either. And you know, just the look on my mom's face when I put it on is totally worth it.”


Irene smirked, winking at Molly before opening the door and stepping inside. It was early and it wasn't too busy. They spotted Sherlock and Greg instantly. Once seated, after the 'hello's' and little pleasantries, the conversation went back to Irene's dick lipstick.


“I actually like to call them lipdicks, has a nice ring to it.”


“What are you talking about.”


Greg asked in wonderment and he bursted out laughing when Irene showed him the lipstick.


“Wow, that actually looks really real. Hey Sherlock, what do you think? I didn't even know they made stuff like that.”


Greg grinned from ear to ear, shoving the lipstick in Sherlock's hands. Sherlock's eyebrow went up, expecting the lipstick and Molly noticed a light blush on his cheeks.


“ Yes Sherlock... What do you think?”


Molly turned to Irene, that tone of voice sent a shiver up her spine. It was the tone she used when she knew something other's didn't.


“They. Well, they look good I suppose. Still don't see the point of making lipsticks in the form of dicks.”


Sherlock blushed more now, quickly handing back the lipstick to Irene, not meeting her eyes.


“So, what was that about?”


Molly asked as soon as they left the restaurant. Sherlock hadn't said more then 5 words after the while lipstick talk and Irene had kept throwing Sherlock these looks.


“What do you mean love?”


Irene asked semi- innocently, getting out the key and heading inside.


“Don't even try Irene. I saw the way you looked at Sherlock tonight. Poor guy was terrified. What did you do?”


Molly stood in front of Irene, arms crossed. Sherlock was one of her closest friends and anyone that dared to hurt him had to watch our for her. Irene understood cause she took a small step back seeing the fire in Molly's eyes.


“I didn't do anything Molly. I just happen to know something, that's all.”




Molly saw Irene shift her gaze away and realized it must be something big. Irene almost never felt insecure or doubt.




“You know I told you I saw a photo of the lipdicks on Instagram?”


Molly nodded her head slowly. Irene was still looking away.


“Well. I found it on Sherlock's. Nobody knows it's his account of course but I figured it out.”


“So Sherlock posted a photo of those lipsticks. That's not so bad right? We all share silly stuff from time to time.”


“He was wearing it.”


Irene looked down and Molly just blinked her eyes rapidly.


“He wears make up?”


Molly dropped down on the sofa, still not really believing it. She couldn't picture it, Sherlock Holmes with make up.


“And you. Irene! You knew and you teased him about it tonight!” Molly looked up sharply at her girlfriend. Irene was still standing in the same spot, not daring to look over at Molly.

“Why would you do that Irene? It's not. That's not good. You have to apologize to him.”


Molly got up and grabbed Irene's hand, guiding her to the sofa and using her hand to get Irene to look at her.


“I didn't. I'm sorry, I didn't think.”


“Clearly. He probably was worried sick you'd blab about it in front of Greg. Wait, does Greg know?”


Irene shook her head, squeezing Molly's hand.


“Damnit Irene.”


Molly gritted her teeth. She loved Irene and her playfull side but sometimes she didn't know when to stop. She'd crossed a line tonight and if only Molly had known sooner she could have stopped her. Her heart broke a little, thinking about the terrified look in Sherlock's eyes. The way Greg had looked at him and then Irene, confusion in his eyes as he looked at her. At the time, Molly had just shrugged, also not knowing what was going on. Sherlock was an easy man to get flustered, beneath all the bravado and flair was a vulnerability that could be easily exploited and Molly hated that Irene had done just that.


“You have to make it right Irene. Sooner the better. I'm.... I have to say I'm disappointed in you.”


“I'm sorry love. I'll call him right now.”


Irene stood up, heading for her purse and trying to find her phone. For someone so elegant and in control of everything else, her purse was just a mess. It was filled with papers, handkerchiefs, keys, lipsticks, a brush, a charger, a little notebook and 3 pens. Molly rolled her eyes as all of it landed on the coffee table.


“There you are!”


Irene held the phone up, looking at it crossly as if it had offended her by not magically appearing in her hand.


“You'd better text Irene, you know how Sherlock is.”


Irene frowned at Molly, holding the phone in her hand, other hand on her hip.


“Right. You do know I still find him a bit 'peculiar'?”


“You're not the only one. Go on, text him.”


Irene came back to sit next to Molly as she fired off a text, asking to meet so they could talk about last night. Molly didn't get her hopes up to high, the chance of Sherlock actually replying or saying yes were slim.


They both startled at the sound of an incoming text. Irene's face lighted up.


“Really peculiar indeed.”


She handed the phone to Molly, an eyebrow raised up and a small smirk on her lips. Molly looked questioningly at her while taking the phone.


No need to 'talk things out'. I've already told Greg my secret and he had an amazing reaction to it. Tell Molly to let you off the hook for this one. PS. The sex has been amazing. SH


Molly's mouth fell open, rereading the text again and then she just bursted out laughing. Tears were rolling down her face by the time she was finished.


“Guess he liked the lace panties too then.”


Molly turned to Irene, eyes again huge and Irene laughed again.


“Greg is going to freak when we show him this.”


Molly handing the phone back to Irene with a smile, whipping away the last of the tears.


“I though we couldn't laugh with Sherlock?” Irene crossed her arms, eyebrows raised.


“Yes. But I never said anything about teasing Greg.”


Molly laughed as Irene looked at her with disbelieve.


“Well Miss Hooper. Not at all an angel are we?” Irene came closer, grabbing Molly's shirt to pull her in.


“Can't be. I'm dating you remember?”


Molly smiled, quirking an eyebrow up, being very pleased with herself.




Irene mumbled softly before closing the distance and snogging her girlfriend senseless.