The amount sexual tension in the room was about to kill Harry.
Harry and Snape were sitting not even two feet away from each other, and it was so awkward that Harry wanted the overly stuffed couch he was sat on to swallow him up whole. Everybody else was going about their business, chatting and picking at the bits laid out at the far end of the room. But they didn’t know.
Snape was sitting in the armchair to his right. Harry had no idea if he was feeling as awkward because that would involve looking at the man, and that was something Harry was steadfast refusing to do. Snape, the bastard, was looking at him. Harry could feel his gaze and it just made things so much worse. How dare he be so calm? How dare he be able to gather enough courage to do what Harry has been trying to do for the past half hour? Who was the Gryffindor here?
Of course, none of it was made any easier by the amount of people around them. Dumbledore was talking with Mr. Weasley, while he ate some sweets and every so often glanced at Harry. Ron and Hermione were in the corner of the room making love stick faces at each other (one of the reasons Harry had left to sit where he was). Sirius and Remus were talking by the food. Well, Remus was talking. Sirius was busy eating. Fred and George were up to something, and Ginny was on to them by the accusatory glares she kept sending them. McGonagall, Professor Sprout, Percy, and Neville were all speaking animatedly not too far from Harry.
Basically, everyone that Harry knew was in the room. The ones he didn’t know seemed too star struck to talk to him, or too busy trying to talk to anybody in the Order. Luckily, Hermione had offered to hex anybody from the Daily Prophet right out the door. Which she did. Rita Skeeter didn’t stand a chance.
Still, with all these people around, not one of them had come to Harry’s rescue. So he was stuck sitting a couple feet from Snape, trying desperately not to do anything embarrassing. Snape, of course, didn’t help. Harry was torn between snapping at him to stop looking at him because he knew, all right? and being too mortified to even glance his way. The thought had Harry’s face heating up with a threatening flush of embarrassment.
It was then that Harry’s eyes found Sirius’s and he saw his God father grin at him, a mixture of pride, cheek, and teasing. Harry knew why Sirius was looking at him like that, because it was that exact reason that last night had happened in the first place. If Sirius knew, he’d cry.
14 Hours ago:
Harry’s robes were too tight. He hadn’t had to wear his formal robes since the Yule ball, for merlin’s sake. Tonight’s event, a celebration hosted by a very wealthy couple, was sprung on him last minute by a bashful looking Hermione who had forgotten to tell Harry about it at all, due to being too wrapped up in Ron and their new relationship status.
As Hermione had pointed out, Harry hadn’t grown height wise all that much (something he didn’t actually need pointing out, thankyouverymuch). He had, however, gotten broader in his shoulders, developed stronger arms, and defined pecs. The result? His dress shirt and trousers were tight, and his actual robe was pulling across his shoulders. Hermione assured him it looked fine, even going as far as to say that it made him look sexy.
Ron would have been jealous if Harry hadn’t come out to his best friends as gay a few weeks after the war was over. Instead, his Ron had grinned and made a joke about Harry possibly getting lucky. Harry highly doubted it.
He wasn’t even really out yet. How could he hope to be flirted with by a bloke, let alone get laid if nobody knew he was gay?
It turned out while no men had flirted with Harry there were plenty of women. Introductions and flirtatious conversations were prompted by both the interested women and their parents. One girl was practically shoved at him by her mother, and was so painfully star struck that she couldn’t manage to get a word out.
At least it was better than the girl that practically screamed when she saw him and then proceeded to tell him how hot he was.
So there Harry was, standing in the middle of a room full of people, trying once again to get out of a conversation with a girl throwing herself at him.
He glanced around for a friendly face to pull him out of it, and spotted Sirius. Harry had to refrain from sighing aloud in relief. He tried to signal for help, but the girl chose that moment to lean in to him and brush against his side. Sirius grinned at Harry, a proud, cheeky, teasing thing.
Harry had yet to come out to Sirius, mostly because he didn’t know how he’d take it. So Sirius really couldn’t be blamed for not understanding Harry’s distress call when a beautiful girl was throwing herself at him.
“Potter,” a deep voice said sternly.
Before Harry knew it, Snape was standing in front of him, blocking Sirius from Harry’s view. Harry blinked, and felt the girl that was now draped over him stand up straight and take a step away from him. Maybe Harry should have found Snape sooner.
“Professor Snape?” Harry asked, and he got an arched eyebrow in return. Right. Stating the obvious. “What can I do for you?”
Snape said nothing, but his eyes darted over to the girl standing uncomfortably by Harry. She squirmed a bit, a blush covering her cheeks as if she just now realized how inappropriate her actions had been for such a public event (not to mention that said actions weren’t even wanted). Snape was seemingly waiting for the girl to catch on, and when she did, she slipped away into the crowd without so much as a goodbye.
Harry was relieved for about three seconds until he realized he was alone with Snape. His mind used to automatically list everything he could be in trouble for, but nowadays it was too busy listing all the reasons it decided to fancy Snape. One of those top reasons being Snape’s voice. As a result, Harry tried to avoid being in conversations alone with Snape. Where he’d have to focus on that voice of his. Where his libido would skyrocket and his hormones would go berserk.
Harry’s gaze went past Snape, and managed to meet Sirius. His Godfather was watching intently, a pinched look on his face and his body obviously tense. Not wanting to cause a fight in the middle of the celebration, Harry gave a slight shake of his head to Sirius. Surprisingly, he listened and stayed where he was. His eyes were still glued to them, though, but Harry figured it was the best he was going to get.
“Potter?” Snape said, bringing Harry’s attention back to him. He looked unamused, and Harry was glad that he was no longer a student because that look usually proceeded Harry being given detention. “The Headmaster wishes to know if he’ll be seeing you tomorrow. He has plans to have the Order’s photograph taken,” Snape said, and he seemed highly annoyed by the idea, “so try to show up in something that actually fits you.”
“I don’t have anything planned for tomorrow. What’s happening?”
“Another celebration that the war is over, all centered on our savior,” Snape drawled, and the sarcasm was so thick it would have been insulting if Harry hadn’t gotten used to it by now. Also it was on the list of reasons why he fancied Snape. Sarcasm and Humor, numbers four and five. At least Snape hadn’t said “Chosen One” or “Boy Who Lived Twice” or any of those names being flung around.
“I wasn’t told about that. Do you know where it will be? What time?”
“I believe Miss Granger was supposed to inform you of those details.”
“Monosyllabic as always.”
Harry brushed off the comment. Sirius seemed to have deemed their conversation too long for his liking, and was walking over towards them.
“Thank you, sir,” Harry said, watching as Sirius got closer. The gleam in his godfather’s eye told Harry all he needed to know. “If you’ll excuse me,” Harry said then, glancing to Snape and giving a quick nod. Harry walked around him then without bothering to wait for a reply.
He managed to intercept Sirius before he got within earshot of Snape.
“What did he want?” Sirius asked immediately. Sirius was glaring in Snape’s direction, his eyes angry. He shifted his weight from foot to foot, ready and itching to go confront Snape and looking for a reason.
“Nothing, he just told me about the celebration tomorrow,” Harry replied.
“You didn’t know?” Sirius paused, thinking it over. “Hermione was supposed to tell you,” he said, sounding like he’d discovered something.
“No, I think Hermione’s been a bit… preoccupied lately,” Harry said, eyes darting over to the table where Hermione and Ron were sat close together, whispering and kissing.
“Snape didn’t need to tell you; she’d have remembered,” Sirius said, thinking aloud and ignoring Harry. “He’s up to something,” Sirius decided. “Are you sure he didn’t say anything else?”
Harry shook his head. “Other than telling me I should try to come in robes that actually fit me tomorrow, no,” Harry said with a smile, looking down at himself. “He’s right too. These haven’t fit since fourth year.” Looking up at Sirius, Harry froze. His godfather’s eyes were wide as they took Harry in before they sharpened and snapped to Snape. “Sirius?” Harry prompted.
“He say they were tight?”
“Well yeah, he implied, but-“
Sirius started stalking towards Snape, a thunderous look on his face. Harry ran after him, his eyes scanned the crowd for Snape. His former professor was standing talking to some old man, unaware of Sirius storming up to him.
“Sirius!” Harry called, trying not to yell and cause a scene in the crowd. Although, none of it would matter if he couldn’t stop Sirius and he got to Snape. There’d be a duel in the middle of the party. Harry managed to grab hold of Sirius’s arm, effectively slowing him.
“Let go, Harry,” Sirius ordered.
“No, Sirius. It was just a comment,” Harry argued. “It isn’t worth it,” he said, watching Sirius contemplate breaking away and going after Snape anyway. “Besides, he’s right. I can barely walk in these trousers,” Harry added, trying to lighten the mood. He turned to see that Snape had disappeared into the crowd and blew out a discreet breath in relief.
“You be careful around him Harry,” Sirius said suddenly.
“Sirius,” Harry started, but his godfather cut him off.
“He’s a shirt lifter,” Sirius said, glaring at the spot Snape had occupied. “He was probably checking out your arse when you weren’t looking.”
“Sirius!” Harry spluttered in response.
“I’m warning you, Harry.”
“Everything all right?” Remus asked, coming up to them from the crowd. Remus glanced between Sirius and Harry, and Harry guessed Remus had seen Sirius about to go after Snape.
“Fine,” Sirius said, convincing nobody. He stalked off in the other direction, hands clenched in fists by his sides.
Harry watched him go, Sirius’s words still sinking in. Snape was gay? He wasn’t sure if it was Sirius being spiteful or… well that had to be it, didn’t it? Harry had seen Snape’s memories. He knew. He knew how Snape felt about his mother. Snape wasn’t, couldn’t, be gay.
“What happened?” Remus asked him, voice calm and light.
“Snape talked to me and Sirius didn’t like it,” Harry responded simply. He found he was getting more and more annoyed and tired of Sirius’s behavior and attitude towards Snape. It wasn’t even because Harry fancied Snape so much. It was just the immaturity of it all. Okay, it might have been that Harry fancied Snape, but it wasn’t all because of that.
“That all? What did Snape want?” Remus asked with a frown.
“He just told me about tomorrow and to make sure I show up in something that fits,” Harry said.
Remus gave a small smile at the ground, but then looked thoughtful. “You mean you didn’t know about tomorrow’s celebration?”
“No, apparently Hermione was supposed to tell me.”
“Well at least he saved you from that girl,” Remus said with a knowing smile.
“Don’t remind me,” Harry said. He looked around quickly to see if she was near.
“Nice of him to help you out,” Remus said, causing Harry to frown. “Professor Snape,” Remus said. Harry was still confused. “He got that girl to leave you alone?” Remus prompted.
“I don’t think he meant to,” Harry said. “He just wanted to make sure I showed up tomorrow in something that fit for the photo.”
Remus smiled at Harry. “Snape didn’t need to tell you that. Someone would have before then, and he knew it. He was saving you from that girl,” Remus explained. “She was very pretty though. I’m surprised you wanted saving.”
The look Remus gave Harry had him panicking. Did Remus know? Was Harry obvious? Is he waiting for Harry to come out? Now? In the middle of the party?
Seemingly having sensed Harry’s distress, Remus backed off.
“I supposed I should better go track Sirius down and make sure he doesn’t get himself into trouble,” Remus said. He smiled softly at Harry. “I’ll see you tomorrow if I don’t later on tonight.”
“Yeah. Uh. Right,” Harry said, nodding. “See you then.”
As Remus headed off in the direction Sirius had gone, Harry walked to the table where Ron and Hermione were still cuddling. He sat himself down in a chair opposite them, thinking over what both Sirius and Remus had said.
“What’s wrong, Harry?” Ron asked, his arms wrapped around the back of Hermione’s chair. Hermione brushed down her dress and cleared her throat.
“Nothing,” Harry said automatically.
“Snape said something, didn’t he?” Hermione guessed. When Harry shook his head she frowned. “Sirius? Remus?” she tried again.
“Come on, mate,” Ron said. “We’ve taken on You Know Who and his death eaters together,” Ron said, not calling Voldemort by name out of habit, “if you can’t trust us, who can you?”
“Remus said Snape saved me from that girl,” he told them. “He had this look in his eyes – Remus I mean – and its got me wondering if he knows,” Harry said, looking between Ron and Hermione. “About me,” he added.
“I’m sure he just meant that Snape saw you were uncomfortable, and…” Hermione paused, trying to finish her sentence, “wanted to help.”
“Snape? Help Harry?” Ron asked, a look of amusement on his face at the idea.
“Well he’s been doing it long enough, hasn’t he?” Hermione said, sitting up straighter. “What’s one more time?”
“It’s Snape,” Ron said as if that was explanation enough. “Why would he help Harry just because he was looking uncomfortable?”
Harry slumped in his chair at that because Ron was right. Snape wouldn’t help him for nothing. Snape didn’t even like him. That was what made Harry’s bloody fancying him so damn hard.
“He obviously saw how embarrassed Harry was-“
“All the more reason for him to let him suffer!” Ron interjected.
Great. Thanks, Ron. This is making me feel loads better, Harry thought miserably.
“- and he decided to intervene and save Harry from her,” Hermione finished.
“But why would he care!”
“It’s just the type of man he is,” Hermione said. Ron looked at her with his mouth hanging open.
“And what type of man is that?” he asked.
Hermione sniffed at the question, straightening up and picking at the hem of the tablecloth. “You know,” she said, suddenly fascinated with the threadwork. “Noble.”
Ron’s laugh was a bit hysterical.
“Tell me you’re joking,” he said. “He almost made Neville kill Trevor just because Neville wasn’t good at potions. In fact, he would have it weren’t for you,” Ron pointed out.
“That’s not what we’re talking about,” Hermione snapped.
“Unbelievable,” Ron said, shaking his head. He turned to Harry. “Can you believe this? My girlfriend’s got a crush on Snape!”
“I do not!” Hermione protested, her voice jumping an octave. Her eyes darted to Harry, worried that he’d be upset. Harry was too busy being miserably and confused to notice. His mind wouldn’t stop thinking. Hermione cleared her throat, but it didn’t help the blush that had covered her cheeks. “I’m merely saying that… well, I mean… The thing is…”
“Sirius says he’s gay,” Harry blurted out.
Hermione and Ron both froze in shock.
“Really?” Hermione asked. “I thought you said-“
He’d told both Hermione and Ron about Snape’s memories. It was how he got them to both be on his side and understand why they had to protect Snape. To stop him from being convicted and sentence to Azkaban during the trials. He’d have been the first to go if not for them. Snape’s memories, including his memories about his relationship to Harry’s mother, was vital for them all to know. Snape didn’t like it, but he understood. Harry shared a long look with Hermione before he looked at Ron. His best friend was just staring in confusion at him.
“Gay?” Ron said finally, testing the word on his tongue in association with Snape.
“That’s what Sirius says.”
“Well that’s Sirius,” Hermione said, “he was probably just saying. It doesn’t mean it’s true.”
“Hang on,” Ron said with a frown, “why do you want it not to be true so badly?”
Hermione’s blush deepened. “That’s not why! And I don’t! I’m just saying it doesn’t mean it’s a fact.” Ron was looking a mix between amused and disgusted. “We’ve not seen or heard of any boyfriends or partners, have we?”
“Haven’t heard of any girlfriends or wives either,” Harry countered.
“It’s Snape!” Ron practically yelled, looking between Harry and Hermione as if they’d gone mad.
Hermione sent a harsh glare at Ron. “What did he want from you? I saw you two talking after she left.”
“He told me about the celebration tomorrow,” Harry said. “The one you were supposed to tell me about?” Hermione’s eyes widened in time with his statement.
“Oh, I… I forgot,” she said, looking sheepish. “I would have remembered though. Or at least, someone else would have mentioned it, surely.”
“That’s what Remus said. He said Snape would have known that, too.”
“So why tell you then?” Ron asked.
“Dunno,” Harry shrugged. “That’s what I can’t work out.”
“What’s this got to do with Snape being gay?” Ron asked with a frown.
“Sirius thinks Snape was, uh,” Harry wasn’t sure he was going to be able to say it, “checking my arse out,” he said, forcing the words out and a blush back. “That’s why he came over, and the rest was an excuse or something.”
Ron was about to burst into laughter or shriek in horror, while Hermione’s blush worsened.
“That’s perfect,” Ron said, settling on laughter. “Why don’t you go and talk to him, then?”
“And say what?” Harry asked. “Oh, Hello Professor, Sirius says that you’re gay and that you were checking out my arse. It just so happens that I am too, and I think that you’ve got a lovely arse yourself. So why don’t we go pop into the broom closet for a quick shag?”
“He’s just gone out the side door,” Hermione noted, her eyes coming back to settle on Harry from where they had been apparently watching Snape. “Now’s your chance,” she said.
“Hermione, I was joking,” Harry explained slowly.
“You’ll never know if you don’t talk to him,” she said.
“I can’t just-“
“You’ve defeated Lord Voldemort, you can certainly pluck up enough courage to go talk to Snape,” Hermione said, cutting Harry off.
“I think he’s more scared of Snape,” Ron smirked.
Harry glanced over his shoulder, looking across the room to the side door that Snape had used. He swallowed. Nerves fluttering throughout him.
“Go on,” Hermione pushed gently.
“What would I even say?”
“Finding out if he’s actually gay would be a good start,” Ron joked.
“Oh god, what if he’s not?” Harry asked, eyes wide. “What if I go over and talk to him, flirt with him, and he’s not even gay?”
“You won’t know unless you try,” Hermione said.
“He’d have enough to humiliate me for life. He could tell the daily prophet and I’d be outed in front of the entire wizarding world,” Harry said, panic setting in at the thought.
“Or you two could shag and live happily ever after,” Ron said with a shrug.
“Not what I was thinking, but close enough,” Hermione said. When Harry didn’t move, Hermione sighed. “Go on,” she said. “If you don’t do it now, you never will and then you’ll spend the rest of your life wondering what would have happened if you’d gone.”
“Go, or I’ll make you,” Hermione said, pulling her wand out slightly.
“I’m going,” Harry said, standing up with his hands in the air. He turned and looked at the side door, feeling jittery and unsure.
“Good luck, mate,” Ron said.
Outside was warm. The night sky was lit by the stars and the half moon, and tonight’s venue provided several lanterns scattered throughout the garden. It was quiet except for the chirping of crickets and the light sound of the fountain.
Harry saw several people were standing outside, mostly couples who had sought some privacy. He scanned the garden for Snape, but couldn’t find him. For a second he debated going back inside. It would be easy to give up now and try to forget about it all. Hermione’s words, however, were stuck on repeat in his mind. He did not want to wonder for the rest of his life.
Walking past the couples, Harry descended the small staircase that led off the stoned patio and onto the fresh grass of the garden. He saw the well-kept maze in front of him and convinced himself to go in to look for Snape. He hadn’t been fond of mazes since fourth year, but this small thing wasn’t so scary.
Harry ran into a dead end four times before he found Snape. His former professor had exited the maze on the other side, and was standing by a pond, staring at the calm water. There were no lights out this far, and Harry reckoned it was Snape’s way of shutting out the party completely.
He hesitated at coming out of the maze, his nerves getting the better of him. He had to talk to Snape. He owed him thanks at least for saving him from that girl. Even if he hadn’t intended to do that. Harry should just approach him. Clear his throat or something. He should-
“Potter,” Snape said without looking away from the pond. “What is it?”
“Oh, I, uh… I-“
“I expect you have something to tell me, or did you just seek me out specifically to annoy me?”
Right. This was a bad idea. Harry wished he hadn’t come out here at all. It didn’t even matter if Snape was gay, because he clearly doesn’t like Harry, so it really doesn’t make a difference.
“Well?” Snape asked, and even though Harry couldn’t see him in the dark, he knew that the man was arching one eyebrow and looking at him expectantly.
“I just wanted to make sure you were all right,” Harry said.
Harry didn’t hear it, but Snape must have muttered a quick “Lumos” because suddenly there was light coming from the tip of Snape’s wand. The little glow it gave them let Harry see Snape’s eyes were narrowed into suspicious slits.
“Is Black looking for me?”
“No,” Harry said.
“I did see him earlier, you know,” Snape said. “He’s not subtle.”
“If you saw him then why did you just stand there? Were you looking for a fight?” Harry asked with an edge to his words before he could stop himself. Snape’s eyes took on a glint, and Harry knew that he was about to let out some scathing retort of some sort. “I just mean,” Harry said quickly, “yes, he was looking for you, before. He’s not now, though.”
There was a moment of silence between them, and Harry felt Snape’s scrutinizing gaze on him the whole time. He felt his face heat and he hoped the light from Snape’s wand wasn’t enough for the man to see his blush.
“He’s said something to you.”
It was a statement. Snape was good.
“What did he say?”
Harry shifted uncomfortably.
“Potter,” Snape said, demanding an answer.
“He didn’t say anything. He was just being, him.”
“The wolf said something too, didn’t he?”
“He has a name.”
“What did they say?” Snape asked, ignoring Harry. “Potter, you will tell me at once or-“
“You’ll what?” Harry asked, cutting Snape off. “You can’t give me detention anymore, or take house points. What are you going to do?”
“Just tell me what-“
“You can’t treat me like a child, either,” Harry said, not knowing where the anger in him was coming from or why it was all being directed at Snape now, but unable to stop himself. Probably the pent up stress of dealing with his feelings of Snape, the man himself, Sirius, and Snape and Sirius’s near constant threatening showdown. “I’m not a boy anymore. I’m not your student. I’m not going to let you treat me like this.”
“Stop being so dramatic, Potter,” Snape scoffed.
“No,” Harry said forcefully. “I’m sick of you treating me like this.”
“You’re the one who came looking for me, Potter. So, tell me what Black and Lupin said, or leave.”
“You’re unbelievable, you know that?” Harry said throwing his hands in the air. “To think I came to thank you,” he said shaking his head and laughing bitterly at the idea.
“Remus said you were saving me from that girl when you came over to talk to me,” Harry said. “Using the celebration for tomorrow as an excuse or something.”
“Black disagrees?” Snape asked, and Harry did note on some conscious level that he was not confirming or denying what Remus said.
“Not with the bit about using the celebration as an excuse,” Harry said. His brain still wasn’t quite caught up with what his mouth was saying, but he didn’t care because Snape was still treating him like one of his students even when Harry was going out of his way to show respect and making an effort. He was going to thank him. He thought they’d moved past all this bickering, but Snape just wouldn’t let that happen, would he?
“So what does he think I was doing then?”
“Checking out my arse, apparently!” Harry laughed. He was sounding a little like he’d lost it, which maybe he had, so he was happy that they were this removed from anyone else.
Snape was quiet.
“Sirius says you’re gay,” Harry clarified, just in case he had to. He was laughing, he realized. Snape’s eyes were narrowed and he was very still. “Gay!” Harry said again, throwing his hands out in a gesture to Snape. “You!” Harry ran a hand threw his hair. “Apparently he missed the part of you being in love with my mother!”
“What?” Snape asked, deadpan. He seemed to have snapped out of his silence, and was looking at Harry with dangerous eyes.
Harry stopped laughing, and what he’d just been saying hit him. He froze. Hadn’t he been the one who didn’t want to make a scene? Then he went and told Snape that Remus had thought he had purposefully driven that girl off and Sirius saying that not only was Snape gay, but he had his sight set on Harry of all people!
Snape seemed to be vibrating and Harry knew that couldn’t be a good sign.
“I didn’t mean to tell you any of that,” Harry finished lamely. Snape didn’t say anything or move. “Remus was just being nice, and Sirius… Well Sirius was being Sirius. It’s nothing. I’m sorry,” Harry said. “I didn’t believe him,” he added as if that made a difference.
Snape’s eyes narrowed.
“He was just trying to insult you. It’s not worth-“
“Why would that be an insult?”
Harry blanched. “What?”
“Being called gay,” Snape said. “Why would it be an insult?”
Harry didn’t know what to say.
“And furthermore, what is this nonsense about me being in love with your mother?”
Faced with a question Harry did know the answer to, he jumped on it. “Your pensive!” he exclaimed. “I saw!” Harry tried to put a sentence of more than two words together. “How you met and the things you did for her and the other stuff!”
Snape raised an eyebrow.
“Eloquent as ever,” Snape taunted.
“Shut up!” Harry said, finding that anger inside of him flaring again. “You don’t get to act like I’m the one not making sense! I saw!”
“In that case, I don’t know what you saw, because nowhere in any of my memories was I ever in love with Lily,” Snape said.
“I may have loved your mother, but I was never in love with her.”
“Wrong gender,” Snape said, with almost amusement in his eyes.
Harry hadn’t meant why in that way. He meant why as in why did his memories seem like he was in love with her? Why didn’t he tell Harry? Why was that statement the problem in what Harry had told him and not the rest. Why wasn’t he denying that he hadn’t come to Harry’s rescue to get rid of that girl? Why didn’t he get angry that Sirius had thought he was interested in Harrry?
Then Snape’s words caught up with him.
And then Harry saw that it was amusement in Snape’s eyes.
“You’re gay then?” Harry asked and oh my god why was he saying the most useless stuff that he didn’t need to say at all.
There was absolutely nothing obvious about it, and Harry wanted to tell him that but he refused to let his mouth open for fear he’d say something even more stupid.
“Me too,” he said.
Harry’s eyes widened at his statement and he saw Snape’s do the same. He tried to think of a way to back track, but he couldn’t.
Snape suddenly brushed past him, walking back into the maze. Harry blinked and whipped around.
“Where are you going?” he asked.
“To get a drink,” Snape intoned as he disappeared into the maze.
Now who’s being dramatic, Harry scoffed to himself.
When Harry found his way through the maze again and went back inside, he couldn’t see Snape through the crowd. He assumed he was at the bar, getting that drink he declared he was after. Instead of seeking him out again, Harry went back over to Ron and Hermione.
“Well?” Hermione asked, sounding, dare Harry say it, excited.
“Couldn’t have gone that well, could it?” Ron said, leaning back against his chair. “They’d have found a broom closet by now otherwise.”
“Shut it,” Harry huffed and sat down roughly in his seat.
“He’s gay. He wasn’t and isn’t in love with my mother. He now knows I’m gay. He went to get a drink,” Harry rattled off, staring at the ceiling as he leaned back and let his head fall.
“That good or bad?” Ron asked.
“No idea,” Harry answered honestly.
There were a few seconds of silence.
“Right then,” Ron said, and by the sound of his chair scrapping back, Harry guessed he was sitting up straighter or getting up. “Why don’t we get us some drinks, too?”
“Sure,” Harry agreed.
“Six fire-whiskies,” Ron told a house elf who appeared from nowhere.
“Six?!” Hermione said when the elf left.
“Course,” Ron said. “One for you, two for me, and three for Harry.”
“Cheers,” Harry said in thanks.
There was a pop and six fire-whiskies sat on the table in front of them. Harry took one in hand and downed it in three gulps. The liquid burned its way down his throat, warming him up in a way the summer heat couldn’t.
“Maybe I should’ve gotten seven,” Ron said.
“Don’t encourage him!” Hermione said.
“I can hear you,” Harry reminded them, downing the next one.
“Not if you keep going like that you won’t.”
Harry twirled the third around, watching the liquid slosh in the glass. He heard Hermione thank someone and looked up to see a house elf taking his other two glasses away, as well as one of Ron’s. Hermione was nursing her own, too busy watching Harry to really drink.
“I’ll have another few of these,” Harry told the house elf.
“Certainly,” it replied.
“Maybe something stronger if you’ve got it?”
When the house elf left, Harry drained the last of his final fire whisky. Five minutes passed, and Harry dedicated it to drinking his alcohol. When the stronger stuff appeared, Hermione sighed.
“It really isn’t that bad.”
“I came out to the one person that might have mattered and I managed to make it sound like an insult,” Harry stated.
“You just told him you were gay?”
“Sure, Hermione, say it a little louder,” Harry said. The fire-whisky was hitting him. “It’s not like it matters now. He’ll be telling anyone who will listen, and I’m sure there are plenty of people who will.”
Harry took a shot of what he didn’t know, but it was strong and it burned. He let his eyes close as he licked the drops from his lips.
“Harry,” Hermione said.
“Not now,” Harry answered. He just wanted to wallow in peace. Peace and alcohol.
“Harry,” Hermione repeated.
“I’m fine Hermione. I’m really not that drunk.”
“Harry,” Hermione insisted.
“Mate, you should listen,” Ron said.
Harry sighed like they were asking him to do the most taxing thing, and met Hermione’s gaze.
“He’s been watching you for the past few minutes,” Hermione stated, very obviously not looking to her right, meaning whoever it was, was on Harry’s left and out of sight.
Harry didn’t care if someone ratted him out to the daily prophet for getting tipsy at the celebration.
“He is Professor Snape,” Hermione clarified, “and he’s now walking over here.”
“Potter,” Snape said and Harry’s tipsy brain thought way too hard about that voice.
“Snape,” Harry said. He was surprised he wasn’t grinning, or maybe he was, because he didn’t say ‘professor’ and Snape couldn’t tell him to because he wasn’t a student anymore.
“May I speak with you?”
Nope. Harry didn’t want that at all. Alone with Snape while his filter was diminishing? Things would be said. Bad things. Dangerous things. Things that would lead to humiliating Harry. Nope, nope, nope. He did not want to speak to Snape at all.
“Sure,” he said instead.
He really had to have a word with his tongue.
Harry pushed away from the table and followed Snape towards the doors that lead into the hall. Harry’s tipsy brain remarked to him that it was sad that Snape’s robes covered his arse. Luckily, Harry wasn’t completely drunk, and managed to keep that thought to himself.
Snape stopped in a corner of the hall between the staircase and the ballroom’s wall. Why did they host this thing in a ballroom? It wasn’t a ball. There wasn’t even dancing tonight, for merlin’s sake. Harry frowned at himself. Off topic even in his own head? This wouldn’t end well.
“I apologize for walking out like that,” Snape said and Harry’s tipsy mind said nothing as it was too in awe of the fact that Snape had apologized, and to him of all people.
When Harry realized Snape wasn’t going to say anymore than that, he decided to tell him it was no problem. Instead, he said, “I thought I’d insulted you,” and why that was relevant to anything he wished to tell Snape at the moment, he didn’t know.
“Yeah, with the gay thing,” Harry said. He really shouldn’t have had those drinks. He was bad enough talking to Snape about this sober. Snape just arched an eyebrow but Harry’s mind wasn’t upset at that, it was too busy deciding that it was a perfect eyebrow. Snape had nice eyes too. Harry frowned at his mind. Focus. He had to focus.
“I suppose it’s not entirely your fault. Most muggles are still quite homophobic. I wouldn’t be surprised if your aunt and uncle were, too,” Snape said.
Harry shook his head. “No, no,” he said. Then he shook his head again. “I mean yes.” He paused, trying to get his mouth on the same track as his mind. “They weren’t accepting of much. But what I meant was saying that Sirius told me that he thinks you like me,” Harry explained.
“Did he not?”
“He did, but I didn’t mean for it to insult you. In case you thought I thought you would ever like me like that. Even if we both are gay.”
Well this was going well.
Snape was silent. Harry waited for him to agree with feeling insulted, or just deny that he would ever like Harry like that. He didn’t wait long, but it was that small amount of time that Snape was still that spoke the loudest. The fact that he took any time at all to rebut the idea. Realization dawned on Harry and he felt his eyes widen impossibly.
“Do you fan-“
“I said all I wanted to say, Potter,” Snape cut him off. “That is all. Thank you for your time.”
With that Snape took off. He didn’t bother going back into the ballroom, instead he seemingly had his sights set on the front door. Unfortunately a large group of people were crowding around it, getting their coats or outer robes while saying goodbye to each other. It was nearing on midnight now, Harry realized.
Snape diverted his route to the staircase. He practically ran up them, but somehow managed to make it look graceful which both Harry’s tipsy brain and sober parts thought impressive. Harry found he was admiring his legs when he suddenly remembered what he had been in the middle of asking Snape and that he should probably go after the man.
Running up the stairs for Harry was less graceful, but he didn’t care. At the top of them he saw Snape striding down a narrow hall. Harry went after him.
Snape took a left and then another left, following that by a right. Harry almost lost him for a moment, but caught sight of him just as he turned the last corner. He wasn’t sure if Snape knew he was following him or if the man was just running away to find a floo, but Harry could ask him all that after he caught up and got the answer to his question.
As Harry rounded the corner, he saw Snape heading for a door. Harry sighed and started jogging. He knew if Snape got behind that door he’d lock himself in and probably use the floo to leave. Harry was a little over half the distance away when Snape threw open the doors and disappeared inside, pulling the doors closed behind him with a loud thud.
When Harry reached the doors he thought about knocking. He wondered if he should yell out for Snape to open them. He thought of breaking the door down. He thought about both yelling and breaking the door down. He thought about knocking, yelling, then breaking the door down. And then the sobering part of his mind told him to just try the handle.
“Snape?” Harry asked as he pushed the door open.
The room was not a room at all, but a balcony. The stone balcony was bordered by a black metal railing, as ornate as the ballroom downstairs and the rest of the manor. Snape was clutching onto the railing, back to Harry. He was quiet and still and just like he was earlier.
Harry approached with caution. He felt completely sober, and he wasn’t sure if that was all that welcome at the moment. At least before he hadn’t been this bloody nervous.
“Is it ‘Professor’ now?” Snape asked, voice quiet.
“Would you like me to call you just Snape then? After all that time you spent reminding me of your title?”
“Didn’t do much good, did it,” Snape answered.
If it weren’t for his grip turning his knuckles white on the railing, Harry would have guessed the man was completely calm.
“Well what else am I supposed to call you?” Harry asked.
“You’d kill me if I tried that as a student,” Harry pointed out.
“As you keep reminding me, you are not a student anymore.”
“No,” Harry said. “I’m not.”
They were quiet for some time. Harry looked out at the view and saw the garden. He thought about what he’d said and what Snape had. He thought about what Sirius had said and what Remus had said. What Ron and Hermione had said, mostly Hermione. He thought about downstairs, and he thought a lot about that question.
He had to know.
“Do you?” he asked, and his voice sounded wrong to break the silence that had settled between them. Snape said nothing. Harry turned and looked at him. Snape’s eyes never left the garden. “Do you fancy me?” Harry asked and it was the hardest thing he’d had to do and keep in mind he’d taken on Voldemort not three months ago.
Snape still said nothing.
Snape’s eyes darted to him and back to the garden.
“Do you fancy me, Severus?”
Harry moved a little closer without thinking.
“Severus?” he tried again. “Do you fanc-“
Lips were pressing hard against Harry’s. They were warm and smooth, pressing into Harry like they needed to really feel his lips against them in order to believe it was real. It only took Harry a second to kiss back. His lips parted easily and then he was aware of the railing digging into his back.
A tongue was pushing past his lips and dipped into his mouth for the smallest moment before it retreated. Harry chased it before it could fully leave, sucking it back into his mouth. He focused everything he had into the kiss, wrapping his tongue around the one in his mouth. Snape tasted like scotch.
Harry was aware that the reason the railing was digging into his back was because Snape’s entire body was pushing him against it. He had strong arms around his waist, one hand holding his head in place while the other rested on his hip. A leg was between his own, and Snape’s body warmth was warming Harry up nicely in all sorts of areas.
One of his own hands was securely around Snape’s neck as his other hand was wrapped around the man’s back, keeping Harry in place while he held on during the kiss. Being shorter, Harry had to tilt his head up to meet Snape, but when the man pushed to deepen the kiss, Harry simply had to drag him further in.
When he thought about it, which wasn’t something he was really concerned with doing at the moment, he had always imagined a first kiss as soft and tender. That’s how they’d been with Cho and Ginny. Then again, he hadn’t realized he was gay then and maybe he just didn’t know how to kiss girls because it never seemed right. He found himself afraid of breaking them.
He wasn’t afraid he’d break Snape.
Harry had no idea how they started urgent and ended up being more urgent. As the kiss came to an end they barely separated or paused before they went back at it. This time having it be a little dirtier. Teeth pulling at lips and little bites.
Harry gasped when he felt pressure against his groin increase and remembered that the pressure wasn’t usually there, and that it was Snape’s leg pushing against his groin that was resulting in those fantastic sensations.
Snape took the opportunity to go for Harry’s jawline and neck. He bit and licked and sucked his way across then down. When he arrived at Harry’s pulse point, he bit it softly before sucking on it mercilessly. Harry may or may not, but definitely did whimper.
“Of course, Miss, there is one just in the third room to your left,” a voice drifted to them.
Harry and Snape both froze. Suddenly, Harry was being dragged. Snape’s hand gripped him tightly as he walked back inside and down the halls. They crossed an intersection and turned a corner before he threw Harry against a wall. Snape’s mouth was promptly back on Harry’s before Harry knew what was happening.
The sound of footsteps reached Harry’s ears and he thought of warning Snape but then the tongue in his mouth did a little move and Harry hummed. Snape moved back to his pulse point when the kiss ended, giving Harry a satisfied look right before doing so as Harry’s hooded eyes fell closed again against the sensations.
The footsteps got louder.
Harry managed to open his eyes, and saw a woman’s shadow getting smaller as she came closer to the intersection. Of all the things Harry had on his list of possible scenarios that would make a scene tonight, having some woman find him pushed against a wall while Snape sucked hickeys onto his neck was not one of them, albeit it wasn’t that Harry didn’t wish for this exact scenario. Well, maybe not the being caught part.
Snape’s hand drifted down from Harry’s hip and over to grasp Harry’s arse, making Harry moan a little at the feeling. He tried in vain to get himself to say something as the woman got closer, but everything Snape did seemed to stop him from thinking, let alone wanting to stop him at all.
The woman arrived at the intersection and turned the opposite way, not even seeing Harry and Snape. Harry let out a breath of relief and felt Snape’s smirk against his neck before the man was pulling Harry away and down the hall again.
They got two turns before Snape threw Harry against a wall and kissed him breathless. Harry gave as good as he got, pride swelling in him when he managed to pull a deep moan from Snape, seemingly against his will.
Snape retaliated by squeezing Harry’s bum and crushing their pelvises together. They both groaned and Harry wondered who really won with that. Snape? Harry? Both? Neither? He couldn’t tell, so he did it the next time. At least that was the excuse he gave himself. Snape moved between Harry’s jawline, neck, and mouth, ruining Harry’s self-control. He was too busy trying to make Harry come from kissing to pay much attention to Harry’s thrusting.
Well, until Harry changed the angle and made Snape release a sound that was part lust filled moan and part devastating groan. In the minutes that followed they ended up all but fucking each other through their robes. Harry had been breathing heavily since the intersection and the woman, but he crowed in triumph when Snape started panting, his breath hitching every so often with little sighs on the outtakes.
Harry wondered if they might both come up against the wall like this, in the middle of the deserted hall while the party continued downstairs.
Harry’s hips stopped thrusting as his eyes shot open.
“Harry, you up here?” Sirius’s voice called from not so far away.
Snape didn’t stop his thrusting, but he did growl softly against Harry’s neck. The sound, and the feeling of the rumbling chest against his body, had Harry gasping. Snape’s grip tightened on him, moving the hand that was on Harry’s arse to his hip, holding it possessively.
“Harry?” Sirius called out again.
Harry had never thought he’d get to the point where he wouldn’t want Sirius anywhere near him. However, right now, with Snape pressed against him, with Snape’s hands securing him to his body, with Snape’s hips bumping against his own, with Snape’s tongue licking across his pulse point, and with Snape’s erection pressing into his thigh, Harry wanted Sirius to be as far away from him as possible.
Sirius was getting close and Harry couldn’t even imagine what would happen if they were caught like this. Snape wasn’t going to move it seemed, and Harry wondered if he wanted them to get caught so he could finally fight Sirius.
“We have to go,” Harry said and it was the first time he’d said anything to the man since the balcony. Snape paused, licked a sensitive spot on Harry’s neck, right under his jaw, and pulled back. “If we don’t he’ll see us,” Harry said. Snape didn’t seem phased by this. “You might be okay with this, but I don’t want Sirius seeing me this close to coming,” Harry huffed and that seemed to do two things to Snape.
One was that his pupils diluted further. Whether it was the fact that Harry was close to coming, or the fact that he’d said it, Harry wasn’t sure. Either way, it seemed to spark some more lust in the man and Harry would have worried that he’d act on that instead of agreeing to get them out of plain sight if it weren’t for the second thing that statement did to Snape.
The hand on his hip gripped tighter than ever and he shifted to shield Harry almost instinctively from view of anyone but himself. Possessive. Harry should have known. Luckily, Snape’s possessiveness won out over the further sparked lust, and the man did not want anybody, especially Sirius, to see what Harry looked like in this state.
Snape tugged Harry along as he moved them, turning the corner seconds before Sirius. They were both running. Snape’s eyes were darting from room to room as he tried to come up with a plan. It wasn’t like they’d thought they’d ever be in this situation.
They ended up in the same hall that the balcony door was and Harry could see panic on Snape’s face. There was nowhere to else to go. The stairs were in too plain a view. The other halls had no open doors, and Sirius could be in any of them. He could be about to turn on to this one, for merlin’s sake.
Harry dragged Snape to a nearby room and pulled out his wand. He tried alohomora but nothing happened. Snape pushed him aside and whispered something that Harry didn’t recognize. The door, however, swung open.
He shoved Harry inside and pulled the door closed behind himself.
Harry looked around the large space. The fireplace crackled to life as soon as they entered. Harry noticed the tumbler of alcohol on the side table along with three glasses turned upside down in the shape of a pyramid.
To their left was a bed, larger than any Harry had ever seen. It had curtains draped around it, thick and heavy looking. The bed was covered in a thing sheet to accommodate for the hot weather. It was simple with a beige color and white etching pattern across it, shaped like intersecting squares.
“Bed. Now.” Snape said and Harry’s lust was renewed full force at the sound of that voice dipping even lower than he had ever heard it.
Harry scrambled to the bed, pushing his robes off and getting one of his arms stuck in its sleeve. He let the robes fall to the floor as he made his way onto the middle of the bed. He went to work on his shoes next, managing to get them both off by the time Snape made it to the end of the bed.
He was faintly aware of the fact that the man had warded the room and put up a silencing charm or two. Harry looked up to see Snape watching him with amusement.
That couldn’t be good.
A moment later Snape’s wand was in his hand and then Harry’s clothes were gone. Even his socks.
Harry looked down at his naked body, feeling incredibly vulnerable sitting naked on the bed while Snape stood fully clothes, wand in hand. He fought the urge to cover his penis.
“You could have warned me,” he grumbled halfheartedly.
Snape carefully removed his robe and set it on the armchair in the corner of the room. He then removed his shoes, taking his time, before even sitting on the bed. Harry watched impatiently, and vowed to learn that spell.
Turning to look over his shoulder, Snape smirked once more at Harry, his eyes darting down between Harry’s legs. Having had enough, Harry crawled across the bed and molded himself to Snape’s, still shirt clad, back. Harry attacked the man’s neck, focusing a lot of attention on his pulse point, for revenge.
Snape froze, and Harry smirked against his neck before he moved to the healing wound on the man’s neck. The balm Snape would be using to treat the scarred tissue was one Harry knew well. He also knew that it left the area it was applied to particularly sensitive.
Harry gave a light kiss over the tissue and was rewarded with a small, but sharp, intake of breath. He decided this was a nice way to get revenge, and proceeded to lick across the scarred skin firmly. Snape’s harsh moan surprised them both.
The man tried to cover it up, but Harry didn’t give him a chance as he went to work liking, kissing, and sucking the sensitive spot over and over again. He let his hand trail to Snape’s dress shirt as the man’s hand came up and held Harry’s head in place.
Button after button was undone, and Harry revealed in his revenge.
When there were no more buttons, Harry worked the shirt off Snape’s shoulders and pulled it down his arms. At the feeling of Harry’s front coming into contact with his back, Snape froze and pulled back. Harry grinned at him.
“That was very Slytherin of you,” Snape told him. Harry shut him up with a kiss that turned wild in moments.
Snape used the same spell he had on Harry on the rest of his clothing and then picked Harry up just to throw him further onto the bed. Harry grinned and went to turn over.
“No,” Snape said, reaching out to stop him. Harry lay on his back and looked up at Snape questioningly. “I want to watch your face when I fuck you,” he said and he almost made it without smirking. He failed.
Harry’s breath had caught during that sentence and had yet to return to normal. Snape took that as his que to kiss the rest of the air out of Harry’s lungs. Harry couldn’t even complain.
Skin on skin rutting was much nicer. It was also much nicer to do this horizontally, and on a bed instead of against a hard wall.
Snape was much stronger than he looked, and when he pinned Harry’s hands above his head, Harry discovered there was no point in struggling against it. He didn’t mind. From the twitch his penis made, he guessed it didn’t either. Snape smiled against Harry’s chest as he moved down from his neck, kissing and licking.
Snape helped Harry discover how sensitive his nipples were. Harry’s back arched off the bed when Snape took one into his mouth. Harry was panting and swearing as Snape’s hands drifted all over his body in the meantime.
Snape sucked the other one of his nipples into his mouth just as his hand wrapped around Harry’s cock. Harry cried out. Snape ignored him in favor of pumping the prick in his hand. He nibbled at Harry’s nipple as he did so, causing Harry to wonder if he’d make it for a second more.
On one particular upstroke, Snape twisted his hand and sucked hard at the nipple in his mouth and Harry had to shove his fist in his mouth to avoid screaming. Snape pulled his mouth away enough in order for Harry to be able to understand him enough.
“You can scream,” he told him. “Nothing can get past those silencing charms,” he said. “And nobody can break those wards,” he promised.
Harry, at any other time, being so vulnerable and alone with Snape, would have panicked hearing that. Currently, however, he just wanted to beg Snape to fuck him already, so instead of doing anything like thinking what that meant, Harry let himself moan obscenely loud.
Snape’s eyes met his and they were full of lust that surprised Harry. He’d never gotten that look before from anyone and it made him feel all sorts of hot. Harry managed to wiggle his hand out of Snape’s loosened grip and tug on the man to get him to go back up to Harry’s lips.
Their tongues danced for a small while and Harry pulled Snape flush against him, moaning at the contact. He shifted his hips, managing to align their erections. Harry heard Snape groan and grinned.
The started moving together, hips undulating and thrusting in a quickly established rhythm. Gasps, groans, and moans escaped from both of them. Harry loved it when Snape groaned because it came from deep within his chest and vibrated Harry underneath him.
Harry hooked his legs around Snape’s back. The action brought their pricks closer than ever and Harry let his head drop back as he moaned. Snape revisited Harry’s neck and the marks he made there.
“Please,” Harry said, unable to go on. “Please,” he asked right before Snape’s mouth slotted over his own.
Snape’s hand moved to Harry’s prick once more, going past it and his balls to brush against Harry’s hole. Harry gasped into Snape’s mouth, ending up with Snape’s tongue lapping at the roof of his mouth. He felt Snape’s finger circle the hole.
Snape whispered something against his lips, muffled and gone in an instant. Harry guessed it was a lubrication spell as there was slick coating Snape’s fingers suddenly. Harry added that to the list of spells he needed to learn.
The finger teased him for a minute more. It would have been agony if Snape wasn’t so thoroughly exploring Harry’s mouth with his tongue. When the finger pressed in, Harry cried out. The lubricant was warm and made him feel slippery inside. Snape’s finger went in half way before pulling out slowly. Harry whined.
Snape laughed into his mouth, a dark chuckle that had Harry moaning and his arse clenching around Snape’s finger. Snape stopped laughing and growled lowly. His finger pressed in and went further this time before coming out.
Slowly, Snape fingered him until Harry had the desperate urge for more and told him so. When the second finger was introduced, Harry let out an embarrassing sound that seemed to egg Snape on. The fingers were thrust in and out of his body faster and harder, causing Harry to break away from Snape’s mouth to moan and pant.
“More,” he begged and even to his ears it sounded absolutely wanton.
Snape obliged. He started scissoring his fingers and Harry flung an arm across his eyes as he moaned. The scissoring went on for almost a full minute before Snape added another finger. The sounds of his fingers pushing in and out of Harry were obscene and pushed them both further off the edge. When Snape hooked his fingers, brushing against Harry’s prostate, Harry’s head thrashed to the side as he gasped.
“Please,” he said, close to tears with need. “Please fuck me,” he begged, gasping as the fingers hit his prostate again. “Oh, please, Severus.”
The fingers were removed abruptly. Harry whined uncontrollably at the loss, the feeling of wrong so strongly ingrained in him at that action that he almost cried. Harry felt the blunt tip of Snape’s prick against his entrance and he moaned a plea once more.
He looked down to see Snape lined up, and staring at Harry. When their eyes locked, Snape pushed his hips forward. Slowly his cock entered Harry, and it wasn’t painful as Harry had feared once before. It was blissful and perfect. His eyes slipped shut and his mouth opened in pleasure filled “Oh.”
“All right?” Snape asked through gritted teeth. Harry, unable to answer verbally, squeezed his muscles around Snape. “FUCK,” boomed Snape’s voice, startling Harry.
Eyes open now, Harry took in Snape’s appearance. The man looked wrecked. His jaw was clenched in effort and there was a sheen of sweat that had sprouted on his brow. His eyes were screwed shut and his mouth open as he panted.
“Sorry?” Harry said.
“If you do that again, I’ll come,” Snape warned him. Harry nodded. Snape’s hips, which had stilled at Harry’s nonverbal approval, resumed their push forward until Snape’s pelvis was flush against Harry’s arse.
Harry wrapped his legs around Snape, inadvertently changing the angle and pushing Snape’s prick against his prostate. Harry yelled and his back arched from the bed. Snape groaned, his grip on Harry’s hip tightening to almost painful. His nailed were dug in, and Harry knew he’d have bruises the next day. Small crescent moons. Ten of them.
“So tight,” Snape stated, evidently fighting for control and unable to form full sentences. Harry wanted to take the rare opportunity to tease about Snape’s eloquence, but found he was in as bad a shape as Snape. “How are you so tight?” Snape asked in one quick rush of air. He experimentally began thrusting and it was hands down the most fantastic, genius thing he had ever done.
“Ah,” Harry said before he forgot how to breathe.
“You’re as tight as a virg-“
Snape stopped mid thrust, eyes opening and going wide with understanding.
“Well it’s not like I’ve exactly had time,” Harry said with a bit of a hysterical laugh.
Snape still didn’t move. “Am I-“
“Taking my virginity? Yes.”
Snape stared at Harry in shock.
“Well, actually, I guess not. Since you, you know, stopped moving,” Harry said. To make a point Harry contracted his muscles ever so slightly. It seemed to pull Snape from whatever he was thinking and the man groaned before beginning to thrust faster.
“Yes!” Harry cried out as the thrusts hit his prostate. It was wonderful and amazing and everything he had ever thought it would be and more. He felt ridiculous for thinking that too, but he couldn’t even care about it because he was so close to losing the ability to think at all it really didn’t matter. “Harder,” he demanded.
“Harry,” Snape moaned as he obliged and made the bed start rocking up against the wall. “Harry,” he repeated before kissing him.
“More,” Harry asked as their lips broke away from the kiss, still touching each other. “Fuck me harder. I want more,” he told him. Harry wrapped his legs tighter around Snape’s waist. “Make me come, Severus,” Harry asked.
Snape didn’t need to be asked twice. He held on to Harry’s hips and started thrusting harder, faster, rougher. Harry yelled out as his prostate took a pounding. He attached his mouth to Snape’s neck, kissing and licking. On one particularly hard thrust to his prostate, Harry bit into Snape’s collarbone, muffling a cry. Snape wasn’t able to hold back the moans and groans that wanted to escape him as he was too busy fucking Harry into the mattress.
“Fuck,” Harry shouted. “Severus,” he gasped. “Severus, fuck. Severus. Uh. Severus. Uh. Uh-Uh-Uh-Uh. Severus,” Harry moaned. He wasn’t sure what he was trying to ask or convey, but Snape listened to ever single sound he made and took them as encouragement. “Ah, fuck, Severus, yes, fuck. Uh, uhhhhh. Uh,” Harry couldn’t stop the things coming out of his mouth as Snape let go of every bit of control and started fucking Harry into the bed with ferocious thrusts.
“Harry,” he moaned. Harry heard the pants and hitching in his breath and knew he was close or getting there fast. Snape’s aim was impeccable as he fucked the thoughts from Harry’s brain, hitting his prostate perfectly on each thrust.
Harry was seeing stars and felt his orgasm building. Meeting Snape’s thrusts, Harry let himself writhe on the bed, no longer registering the sounds coming out of him. Snape was losing it too, and as Harry opened his eyes, he met Snape’s obsidian eyes and his orgasm hit him like a brick wall.
Harry screamed louder than he could remember, his internal muscles squeezing like a vice grip on Snape’s still pounding prick inside him. Toes curling and hand scrapping against Snape’s back, Harry’s orgasm erupted out of him. Thick, warm ropes of come spurted onto his stomach as well as Snape’s. The wetness slipped down and soaked into the sheets below as Harry felt himself go boneless. Completely blissed out and spent.
Snape’s orgasm was pulled from him halfway through Harry’s. He buried himself to the hilt inside Harry’s body and held himself there as his balls emptied. Ropes and ropes of his come coated Harry’s insides. He yelled out, what he didn’t know, before collapsing on top of Harry.
It was a few moments before they both recovered enough to remember how to move. Snape forced himself off Harry, and to lay on his back. He immediately missed Harry’s sex warmed skin, and pulled the smaller body half on top of him. Harry curled himself up against him. Snape whispered a cleansing charm to avoid the sticky mess if what they had on them, as well as what they were lying on, started to dry.
They stayed like that for another ten minutes, just coming down from the high. It was an exquisite feeling and neither of them remembered feeling like that ever before. Harry tipped his head up and kissed Snape again. It was slow and gentle, but warmed the embers in his stomach.
“Harry, you up here?”
It was Hermione’s voice.
“I suppose I should go before they send a search part or something,” Harry sighed. Snape nodded and made a quiet humming sound in agreement, his lips still against Harry’s own.
“Harry?!” Ron’s voice sounded next.
Sighing, Harry reluctantly removed himself from Snape’s arms and got up from the bed. He went and got Snape’s clothes (the ones he could find, anyway), and placed the on the bed beside him.
“Could you, er, give me my clothes back?” Harry asked him.
Snape picked up his wand and muttered a spell. Harry’s clothing was back on in seconds and he smiled sheepishly at him. He went to the side of the bed where he had left his shoes and robe and put them on next.
Ron and Hermione’s voice still sounded fairly far off, but he didn’t want to risk leaving the room and bumping into them.
Once he was dressed, Harry looked over at Snape, who was buttoning his shirt. A blush spread across Harry’s cheeks and he turned away. He righted his robes, and tried to flatten his hair a little. His clothes were still too tight, and he made a mental note to get new ones the next morning.
Realizing he didn’t know the time, Harry glanced towards the clock above the fireplace and saw it was almost half past one in the morning.
He turned to face Snape.
“I’ll, um, I’ll see you tomorrow, then?” he asked, hoping he didn’t sound as pathetic as he thought he did. Snape’s eyes met him and Harry was reminded of them locking eyes right before they came. His blush became even worse and he worried he looked like a tomato.
“Be sure to get the information from Miss Granger,” Snape said. “I wouldn’t want you to miss the photograph,” Snape added.
Harry grinned at him.
“Of course,” he replied.
Walking to the door, Harry wondered if this was a onetime thing. Would it all end as soon as he walked on the door? He found a hollow feeling settle in him at the thought. He glanced back, and saw Snape watching him. Harry gave him a shy smile before opening the door and leaving.
He found Hermione and Ron two halls down by the landing of the stairs.
“There you are!” Hermione said. “You missed the big announcement. The couple throwing the celebration are donating four hundred galleon to Hogwarts for the restoration.”
“Sorry,” he said.
“Where’ve you been anyway?” Ron asked.
Harry grinned. “Broom closet,” he answered before walking down the stairs, leaving Ron and Hermione to stare after him in shock.
Harry was so absorbed in his thoughts that he didn’t even register the shy little girl that piped up from her position attached to her mother’s leg.
“I’m sorry, what?” Harry asked, shoving his panic aside when Snape of all people had to tell him to answer the small child.
The little girl, dressed in a mock Gryffindor robe hid her face in her mother’s leg. She peeked at Harry, once more, but a smile and giggle later and she was back to hiding her face. The girl’s mother laughed and coaxed the girl away.
“Go on,” the mother smiled, “he won’t bite.”
“Usually,” Snape drawled quietly, and oh my god. Harry froze, realized that was a bad idea, forced himself to laugh, winced at how awkward it sounded, then winced again at wincing.
“Can you really do a full patronus?” the little girl asked, her voice light and shy.
Harry smiled and took out his wand. The little girl’s eyes widened and she let go of her mother’s leg completely in favor of watching Harry.
“Expecto Patronum,” Harry said calmly, and his stag burst forth in all its glory. The room was eerily quiet as the stag pranced around. The little girl was in awe, and when the stag approached her, she gasped and leaned out to try to touch it.
“This is amazing,” she said with wide eyes.
Harry smiled at her.
“You know how old he was when he learnt to do that?” Sirius asked the little girl. She shook her head. Grinning, Sirius said, “thirteen.”
The little girl looked at Harry as if he were a god. Harry laughed smiled at her shyly.
“Please,” Snape scoffed quietly, but not quiet enough for Sirius not to hear.
“What was that?” Sirius asked, his voice instantly harsh.
Harry’s patronus vanished as he turned his attention to Sirius and Snape. He willed them both to let it go. There were small children here, for merlin’s sake.
“Nothing,” Snape said, looking innocent.
“Let’s see you do it then,” Sirius said, a nasty smile on his face.
The room got eerily quite again. People seemed not to want to look at Snape and Harry wondered why. To his knowledge a patronus wasn’t that intimate to let others see. Perhaps revealing, but not intimate.
“Go on, Snivellus,” Sirius taunted. Harry really hated that he still used the nickname. “Show us all your patronus,” Sirius smiled cruelly. He waited, and Snape’s eyes narrowed at him. “Oh wait,” Sirius said then, a frown coming onto his face. “That’s right,” he smiled in faux sadness, “you can’t perform he Patronus Charm, can you?”
Harry frowned. Why wouldn’t Snape be able to do that? Sure, it was challenging, but it wasn’t impossible. Harry knew he was powerful enough and talented enough.
“Because you’re a death eater,” Sirius stated. Harry blinked in confusion. “An unworthy, tainted, dark-“
“That’s enough, Sirius,” Remus said, cutting him off with an edge to his voice. Sirius didn’t mind though, his nasty smile was aimed right at Snape.
Harry finally looked over at Snape, and he was surprised to see a smirk form on his lips. Glancing to Sirius, Harry saw the hesitation on his godfather’s face at Snape’s reaction.
“You sound so sure, Black,” Snape said simply.
“Can you do it?” the little girl asked, not noticing the tension amongst the adults. “Can you really do it?”
Snape didn’t make a move to pull his wand out, instead favoring to ignore Sirius and the little girl. Sirius laughed.
“Of course he can’t,” Sirius said, and Harry wanted to tell his godfather to shut the hell up.
“Why not?” the little girl asked, a frown on her face.
“I can do it,” Snape said calmly.
“You can?” the little girl asked and Snape nodded.
“Liar,” Sirius accused.
Snape raised an eyebrow at him, but didn’t take the bait. Harry wondered why he didn’t just do it and prove Sirius wrong.
“Go on then, Snivellus,” Sirius pushed, leaning back against the wall. “Do it for the little girl.”
Snape ignored him.
“Well, go on then,” Sirius said once more. When Snape still didn’t do anything, Sirius tutted and turned to the small child. “He’s too scared,” he told her.
“Why?” the little girl asked.
“Because he can’t do it and he knows if he tries, bad things will happen,” Sirius explained. The little girl seemed to mull this over.
“So he can’t do it?” she asked.
“Yes. I can,” Snape replied.
“Then do it,” Sirius said.
“Because you can’t.”
“I can,” Snape assured him.
“Then why not do it?” Sirius asked. “You’re too scared, aren’t you?” Sirius smiled. “Too much of a coward to face the consequences.”
Harry closed his eyes because he knew how this was going to go. Snape, Harry realized, had a major issue with that word. Being called a “coward” made the man do stupid things, just to prove he isn’t one. Harry really hopped that this wasn’t one of those times. If Sirius was right, and Snape couldn’t do the spell, Harry didn’t want anything to happen to the man.
Regardless of what happened last night.
Snape’s wand was in his hand faster than Sirius could get another taunt in.
“Expecto Patronum,” he said in a quiet, calm, voice.
From his wand a deer burst forth. A doe. Elegant and graceful. It pranced around a bit like Harry’s did, almost flaunting itself in front of Sirius, rubbing its existence in.
Harry grinned at it and then at Snape, but the man was watching his patronus too intently to realize.
“It’s like Harry’s!” the little girl said.
“Mine’s a stag,” Harry corrected her with a soft smile.
“Nuh-uh,” she denied. “It’s just like that!” She looked down at her feet before looking at Harry from behind her lashes. “You could always show me again,” she said sweetly, and Harry laughs.
“Expecto Patronum,” Harry said, and allowed his stag to join Snape’s doe.
“Woah,” the little girl said, looking between the two of them.
Harry watched his stag and Snape’s doe come together. He tilted his head, realizing that he had never seen patronuses interact with each other. The doe met his stag half way, and nuzzled it. Harry froze, wondering what that meant and if anybody else caught it.
When he looked up, he saw every adult in the room staring in shock. The kind of shock that had been present for a long time and just kept getting renewed in even more shocking ways. Harry knew that the first shock came when Snape managed a patronus practically effortlessly.
“Get the girl out,” Sirius suddenly said.
The girl’s mother, along with most of the other parents with small children, removed them at once. It took a few minutes for them all to clear out. Harry was surprised his patronus was still around.
“What’s going on?” he asked.
His patronus and Snape’s were playing together and every so often, nuzzling.
Before he knew what was happening, Sirius had stormed across the room and punched Snape squarely in the jaw.
“What the hell did you do to my godson?” Sirius yelled in fuming anger.
“I warned you, Harry!” Sirius said. “I told you he was looking at you!”
“Sirius, what are you talking about?” Harry yelled, shoving his godfather away from Snape, who seemed himself to be too in shock to react.
“Sirius, I think you’re overlooking something,” Remus said calmly. He was always so calm.
“What?!” Sirius yelled.
“It’s got to be mutual, my dear boy,” Dumbledore answered for Remus, a look of amusement and a glint in his eye.
“What?” Harry asked. “Would somebody please explain to me what’s going on?”
“Snape’s patronus is a doe,” Remus said as if that explained it all. “That he can do one at all is something,” Remus said. “Only the pure of heart can.”
“More importantly,” Dumbledore said, “is that Snape’s patronus is indeed a doe.” He moved closer to Harry. “I had always assumed it was because of Lily. I suppose it is still,” he said with a shrug of his shoulders. “But this is more.” Harry must have looked confused as he felt because Dumbledore sat down beside him. “You see, Harry, your mother’s patronus took the form a doe, to fit the person she loved, your father, whose patronus and animagus was a stag. Severus’ patronus did the same. He loves Lily, yes, but it would change to match hers, not replicate hers. His patronus took the form of a doe because it took the form that would fit the person he loved, or grew to love,” Dumbledore said.
“Me,” Harry whispered. He looked up and watched their patronuses nuzzling still.
“YOU BASTARD, YOU STAY AWAY FROM MY GODSON!” Sirius bellowed.
“Leave him alone!” Harry shouted, surprising Sirius.
“Sirius, you’re forgetting something else,” Remus sighed, looking at Harry with a shake of his head and a sympathetic smile.
“What?” Sirius spat.
“Patronuses don’t interact unless they’re with their mate,” Remus said lightly.
Harry blinked. Mate?
Sirius froze at the words, whipping around to Remus.
“No,” he said, shaking his head. When he looked back at Harry his eyes were wide.
“Soul,” Snape’s voice sounded. It was a little hoarse and Harry turned to look at him. The dark eyes flashed something vulnerable.
“NO!” Sirius bellowed. “They can’t! I won’t let it!”
“That’s rather out of your control, I’m afraid,” Dumbledore said with amusement.
“So, we’re… soulmates?” Harry asked for confirmation.
Snape nodded. “Apparently.”
“Oh,” Harry replied. “I guess this makes wondering if you’d like to go out some time for a proper date a bit redundant then?” he asked.
Dumbledore laughed, and Remus smiled slightly. Sirius paled.
“Indeed,” Snape replied.
“Harry,” Sirius started but Harry put his hand up to silence him.
“Stop, Sirius. This is my life. I haven’t gotten to make a lot of decisions about my life so far, but this one I can and will,” he told his godfather. Plucking up his courage, Harry barreled on. “I am deciding on Severus,” Harry announced. “If he’ll have me,” he added, glancing to Snape shyly. “I’m happy with him, Sirius.”
Sirius looked pained.
“If-“ he kept his gaze steadily on Harry. “If that’s what makes you happy.”
“Thank you,” Harry said and smiled at Snape.
“If you hurt him, Snape…” Sirius trailed off, but the warning was still there.
“I won’t,” Snape declared, simultaneously accepting Harry and announcing his intentions. “Never.”
“Now, with that settled, how about you two get rid of your patronuses before they get a bit too frisky,” Dumbledore said. “This is a family event, after all,” he said, looking over his glasses at Harry and Snape.
Blushing, Harry let the spell drop as Snape did the same.
The others that had left trickled in again, looking between Sirius and Snape. The little girl came bouncing over and smiled.
“Where’d your patronus go?” she asked Harry.
“It needs to rest right now,” Harry told her. She nodded.
“One day I’m going to do that spell,” she declared.
“I look forward to seeing it,” Harry smiled.
“And I’ll find my match too,” the little girl sighed before running off to find her mother.
Harry blushed again as Snape moved to sit by him on the overly stuff couch. Harry felt Snape’s hand entwine with his own and remembered the activities they’d done last night that involved those hands and intimate places. Harry had to clear his throat a little to cover up the moan that almost threatened to come out.
He didn’t know where this whole soulmate thing was going, but he knew it would be worth it.