Actions

Work Header

And I Will Only Hear Your Voice

Chapter Text

“Just take it slow Mimi!” Soulme glanced over worriedly, continuing only when she saw Mimi nod. “Okay from the top...and one, and two…”

Mimi couldn’t lie, it hurt like a bitch. There was no way in hell she was going to give up or admit that though. Moving around was fine, she could stretch and lift things with no issue, but the one thing she couldn’t wait to get back into was proving to be the most difficult and it was irritating her.

She couldn’t give up dancing.

She also hated the fact that instead of looking pissed off that they had to keep starting over, Soonyoung, Chan, and Shiah kept looking at her like she would keel over and die at any second. She felt less than the others like she wasn’t as good as them and it was killing her. She knew that wasn’t true and they were just worried but it was seriously starting to irritate her.

She snapped.

“Can you stop watching me and acting like I’m going to die?”

Soulme paused the music. “Mimi, we just don’t want you to hurt yourself any more than you al-”

“I’m fucking fine.”

Shiah furrowed her eyebrows. “No, you’re not, we can all tell you’re in pain and it’s okay.”

“It’s not okay. Our competition is coming up, and we don’t have time to sit here and walk around me on eggshells. We need to be putting our all into this regardless of what I’m feeling, which is still FINE, by the way.”

Shiah sighed getting ready for a rebuttal that Mimi didn’t want to hear. “Just shut the hell up and listen to what I’m saying for once in your life, Shiah.”

Soonyoung and Chan looked between the two, too shocked to speak up.

“Mimi, Shiah just wants you to be okay. We all do.” Soulme was trying.

“I’m fucking fine! How many times do I have to say it for it to get through any of your fucking skulls?” Mimi took a deep breath before throwing her hands up. “You know what? I can't do this. I’m leaving.”

She was so upset she didn’t even catch the tears that started streaming down her girlfriend’s face as she slammed the door on her way out.

 

~

 

Seeing Jeonghan at the party sent a surge of too many emotions through Mimi that she didn’t know she could handle. Combined with the fact she was drunk off her ass; riding the thrill of making new friends and the sexual tension she had going with Shiah, it didn’t make sense that her first thought was damn he looks good as a blonde.

The why the fuck is he here and I can’t let Cheol see him didn’t come until too late.

She wanted to hug him, the urge to hug him was so strong but Shiah’s tight grip on her wrist made her snap out of it. And then the anger came surging through her body.

She marched up to him, Shiah in tow.

“Why the fuck are you here?”

Jeonghan turned around, confusion in his eyes before they softened at the sight of Mihyun. He went to reach out to her before remembering and quickly regained his composure, looking at her with indifference.

She was drunk but not drunk enough to see his eyes go from regret to nonchalance.

“I’m looking for someone.”

She bit the inside of her lip, eyebrows furrowed. “Seungcheol doesn’t want to see you.”

His lip quivered, and she wasn’t sure if it was a smirk or the beginning of him about to cry.

“I’m not here for him.” He looked around. “Do you happen to know a Yoobin? Or Binnie. I think she goes by Binnie….” He trailed off.

“No, we don’t, but you should probably leave.” Shiah finally piped up.

Jeonghan’s eyes flickered over to Shiah briefly before landing back on Mimi’s. “Yeah, sure. By the way I picked my stuff up from the house, thanks for packing for me.” He continued to look around, attempting to leave.

Thanks? That’s all you have to say for yourself?”

Jeonghan squinted at Mimi. “I’m not sure what else you want me to say to you.”

Mimi laughed. The fucking nerve. “A ‘sorry’ would be a nice start.”

Jeonghan smirked. “Would my sorry mean anything to you in your drunken state?”

Mimi didn’t know what to say to that. She was flustered to say the least.

“Right. See you around Mihyun.” He mumbled something else before his eyes sparked, successfully finding his next target.

As Jeonghan brushed by her one last time she caught it; the words made her fall to her knees and she didn’t know she started crying until she felt Shiah wipe the tears from her face. She hated him. She wanted to erase the past 6 years and start over without him in her life. It wasn’t fair. Shiah shook her asking what was wrong.

“What did he say to you? Mimi please tell me what’s wrong.”

“It’s nothing. It’s stupid.” She stood on her shaky legs, still drunk.

Mimi watched Shiah frown. She knew it wasn’t like herself to lie to Shiah’s face, but Mimi also knew first hand how good of a liar Shiah was and that she could spot one a mile away.

The commotion in the living room was the only reason she didn’t give in.

As the pair watched the confrontation between Seungcheol and Jeonghan, his words played in her head on a loop.

He knew that she knew. That she had read the letter.

She was still his wonderful shining star.

 

~

 

There was a lot swimming through Mimi’s head and she wished she had the capacity to pick apart the issues and deal with them separately but it was just too much. Everything was still playing on a loop: Jeonghan, Shiah, the competition, Jeonghan, Shiah, the competition.

Her feet quickly led her to the small corner of the library where she was hidden. Where even though she had shed the old, quiet, “stuck in her ways” self, she felt safe and alone. She shakily pulled out the letter from her back pocket, re-reading the letter over and over. To make sure she wasn’t crazy; to make sure she hadn’t heard wrong. She needed to know.

I wonder if I’m ever going to give you this letter. Should I just tell you in person? You are the only constant in my life and you have been since we were 14 years old. Naive and precious, I wanted to protect you from the moment you stood up for me. This is so weird… I feel like I’m writing poetry for you. I’m sitting in the library right now pretending to study for our Biology test. Seungcheol has been looking over every 3 minutes. He thinks I’m working hard, writing really good notes. Little does he know.... Mihyun I love you and I wish I could tell you so much that I can’t. I’m afraid. I thought I was strong but he…. Our friendship will end if I tell you...It would end Seungcheol and I too but…..I... I can’t let that happen. Maybe I won’t give you this letter. Is it lying to you if you don’t know? I’m not sure what the purpose of this is anymore. What I do know is I can’t live without you. I’m pretty sure my life would end if we stopped being friends. What would I do? Who would I turn to? Without my pretty Kim Mihyun to lean on? I think Shiah knows the truth but she’s too good. She knows a liar a mile away because she is one. I… I’m sorry I’m trash talking your girlfriend now, when I’m no better. I’m probably worst. Mihyun. I don’t know what to do. He... Josh. He’s… You know the stars I put up on the ceiling? How I call the biggest one Wonderful? And you laughed at me and called me a child. It’s you. That’s your favorite song right? On that Big Bang album you always overplay the shit out of… its you. I don’t. I can’t let my wonderful star get away right? I don’t know why I’m writing this anymore. I hope you never have to see this. I hope I can get away from Josh and you never have to deal with this. You deserve so much better. Seungcheol does too. I hate myself. I wish I could get out. I hope I can. I don’t know Mihyun.

 

*

 

“DELETE IT RIGHT NOW!” Seungkwan really hated running but when his life was on the line, he was suddenly Usain Bolt and nothing could stop him. Not even the Leo Dicaprio look alike threatening to send the entire student body the video of him dancing to Cyndi Lauper’s Girls Just Wanna Have Fun on Dance Dance Revolution, drunk off his ass.

Seunghee was supposed to be his partner in crime, his best friend, his soulmate.

But she was encouraging the boy and Seungkwan couldn’t believe his eyes.

“You gotta send it to Chaeyeon, it’ll spread way faster. She knows everyone.” Seunghee quickly implanted Chaeyeon’s number into Vernon’s phone, getting a death glare and growl from Seungkwan.

“Sweet.” Vernon said laughing, eyes crinkling. These two are way too much fun

“Whatever.” Seungkwan said sighing, as they sat on their favorite bench. “At least I’m good at singing and I’m good looking.”

Good looking?” Seunghee and Vernon asked at the same time.

“Fuck off. Both of you.”

“I mean if that’s what you really like, I could consider a polygon relationship.” Vernon said shrugging.

“A what?” Seunghee squinted.

“Polygon! You know. Like being with more than one person? I like the both of you.”

Seungkwan snorted while Seunghee rolled her eyes. “It’s polyamorous you fucking dumbass.”

Vernon just waved her off. “You know what I meant.” He placed his arms behind the both of them and laid their heads on each of his shoulders. As people walked by and glanced at them curiously, he felt kind of powerful. Until the both of them brushed his arms away, that is.

“Um, you have to buy us dinner first.” Seungkwan said leaning away.

“Yeah. You think we’re that easy?” Seunghee retorted. “BZZZ. Wrong. We’re not.”

“You guys aren’t what?”

The trio looked up to find Soonyoung in front of them, sweat glistening on his forehead still present from his dance class.

Seungkwan sighed, while Seunghee glared at him. “None of your business.”

“HOSHHHHH, my man!” Vernon got up and bear hugged the boy.

“See? This how you treat a friend.” Soonyoung smiled reciprocating the hug.

“Good thing we aren’t friends, Hosh.” Seunghee replied.

Soonyoung pouted. “You’re so mean, all I want is ‘96 line to prosper and you treat me this way.” He squinted. “Especially considering I’m the one who’s DDR game you two were hogging the entire night.”

Seunghee checked her nails. “I don’t recall. It was a fun party though.”

“Except that guy who keeps trying to kill me. The one with the cow eyes.” Vernon shuddered.

“Seungcheol?”

“Yeah.”

“What even is the story with him? He always glares at you like you’re the reason for all his problems in life.” Seungkwan cocked his head to the side glancing at Vernon curiously.

“Well I mean. I used to like sell my mixtapes where he did a couple years back and he almost beat my ass, but other than that I have no clue.”

“Probably something to do with Jeonghan.” Soonyoung piped up.

Who?” Seunghee knew more people at school than she wanted to but some of the upperclassmen she still didn’t know. Besides Soonyoung, unfortunately.

“His ex? The blonde one who showed up and the reason everyone got kicked out and the party ended so early. Jihoon and I had to drag Cheol away before he murdered the guy.”

“Jesus what is wrong with you juniors? You have more drama than a soap opera going on.”

“Yeah. You probably will by next year too.” Soonyoung shrugged kicking a flat pebble around.

Seungkwan sighed. “If it involves as many hospital visits as you guys, I sure hope not.”

 

*

 

Wonwoo felt like lunch was always the catalyst to a disaster waiting to happen ever since the first time he ate with Seungcheol and his friends. He was starting to believe he’d be better off eating with Mingyu alone again but he was in too deep to do anything about it now. Not to mention he didn’t know where he stood with Mingyu at the moment either.

“Why do bad things happen to good people?” Seungcheol mumbled over his soup dejectedly, as their ever growing friend group slowly made their way to the large lunch table.

“Bad things happen to bad people too.” Mingyu said glaring at Wonwoo.

Wonwoo rolled his eyes, sighing. “Can you stop? You know I love you.”

Hyejin squinted at Wonwoo, squeezing her tiny frame in between Mingyu and Minghao.

“I didn’t do anything wrong! Stop looking at me like you’re going to find a way to kill me, Hyejin.”

Hyojung laughed. “Hyejin isn’t capable of that, don’t worry Wonwoo” She patted his back before frowning at a puffy eyed Shiah. “What’s wrong!?”

“Everything.” She slumped into the booth and buried her head into her arms.

Seungcheol frowned and mouthed “Mimi?” to a worried Soonyoung.

Soonyoung nodded and shrugged.

“Stop twitching and use your words.” Jihoon pushed Soonyoung.

Soonyoung pushed him back. “Why are you so mean to me?”

“He’s fake tsundere.” Seungcheol rolled his eyes. “But you’re under his phone as Soonie with a bunch of hearts so don’t worry about it too much.”

“Fuck off Cheol.”

“He’s too busy doing that with Wonwoo.” Minghao snarked glaring at him.

“Can you all just die? Wonwoo and I didn’t do anything. Nada. Except like get cross-faded as hell.”

“I believe you Seungcheol.” Seokmin said piping up.

“Excuse me? Best friend card revoked." Mingyu glared at him disgusted.

Seokmin rolled his eyes. “You’re being overdramatic Mingyu.”

“Anyway, Shiah what happened?” Jihoon was curious, mostly due to his soft spot for the girl.

“Don’t want to talk about it.” Shiah mumbled head still face down in her arms.

“Will you talk about it with me?” Hyojung asked worried, giving the girl puppy dog eyes that she couldn’t see.

“No. ...Fine.” She lifted her head up. “She yelled at me because we were all worried about her at practice and stormed off and I don’t know what to do.” Shiah frowned. “I think it was something Jeonghan said to her at the party.”

Seungcheol’s eye twitched at the mention of his name, growing visibly agitated. “Do I have to confront him again?”

Shiah sighed. “Please don’t. We don’t need anymore hospital visits or tension between all of us. I’ll work it out with her.”

“For the love of god please do, I hate hospitals.” Jihoon sighed. “Wonwoo, you and Mingyu work on whatever the fuck is going on too, I’m sick of you all.”

Wonwoo opened his mouth to retaliate but he was cut off by the girl with the bob cut and Minghao’s friend from China appearing in front of them.

“Minghao, we’re eating lunch with you and your friends.”

“....Okay…” Minghao furrowed his brows looking around at the others.

Mingyu just shrugged.

Shiah perked up. “What did Jeonghan want from you?” She sized the Binnie girl up unintentionally.

“Who?” The girl cocked her head to the side, eyebrows furrowing.

Shiah sighed. “The blonde guy at the party? He came looking for you.”

“Oh him? He told me to stay away from that Josh guy and to warn my friend to do the same. He’s worried for the both of us.”

 

Everyone stopped chewing.

 

He said that?” Seungcheol piped up.

Binnie nodded looking to Jun for confirmation. “We were pretty drunk but I remember that clearly.”

“Huh. Interesting.”

Wonwoo checked Seungcheol’s face for any visible sign of anger or confusion but he remained nonchalant, even smiling at Mingyu’s bad jokes. What Wonwoo didn’t expect was for Shiah to burst into tears again, babbling an incoherent “I’m so sorry Seungcheol” before running out of the cafeteria leaving everyone speechless and in awe.

 

*

 

jihoon: i understand u not responding to cheol’s text but will u at least reply to me?
jihoon: or hyojung?
jihoon: mimi doesnt know where you are
jihoon: she said u guys arent talking but even shes worried…
jihoon: shiah pls?
jihoon: …..
jihoon: yooa
shiah: im at the park
jihoon: im on my way