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Belvedere gulps and has a glint of terror in his eyes. Wheatley nods and calmly addresses Yanyan, “Alright--Hey, Yanyan; do me a solid and tell Metta and Alphys that we’ll be paying and going for icecream in about ten minutes? I’ll only need five, but those space hoodies are calling to me.”

 

Yanyan reluctantly gets up only because of the promise of future ice cream, nothing better than sweet, creamy ice cream while sitting on sweet creamy tits, he hops down and goes to relay Whe's message to Alphys and Marta. Wheatley then turns to face Bel and her entire countenance changes into one of pure anger. They tap Al on the shoulder to let him know to get out of the way. Am gets up and stands on the side lines between Bel and Y/N. “Get up.” Wheatley tells Bel voice as cold as ice.

 

Belvedere gets up shaking and mostly out of fear. He still looks pissed but scared shitless at the same time and definitely focused on not dying or ending up in a dumpster. “Why the hell you want me on my feet anyway? Goin’ kick me down again?” He retorts.

 

Wheatley raises an eyebrow at him before responding with, “No; I’m giving you a fighting chance, hon. Knock me out, and you can leave without me breaking your legs.” Unbeknownst to him they don't mean it or at least they don't mean that they will literally break his legs, it may feel like it though. Al growls out of frustration, why must the human risk their own safety out of anger?

 

Belvedere smirks a bit and replies cockily, “Fine, I’ll play along, but remember ya asked for it.” He puts all his energy into a right-hook but Wheatley straight-up catches it in the palm of their hand and looks him dead in the eye, “Well, would you look at that; I asked, and I received. Just what the doctor ordered~” Whe begins crushing his fist in their hand and doesn't stop.

 

Belvedere made a noise between a yelp and a scream now sounding more like a dying animal than a “man” with a minor injury. He knew what the Bitch wanted, the Bitch wanted him to beg forgiveness for his supposed sins, well tough titty, he'd  rather sit here and have the count wail on him until he was unconscious hell he'd rather be fucked in the ass by a seven foot biker named ‘Tiny’. Like hell was he gonna do that! Instead he focused on thinking about how the fuck he was going to get even with this cunt.

 

Wheatley snorts amusedly, “You know, I never got your name. Not that it matters; I’ve got a special place in Hell reserved just for folks like you.” She drops his hand to go straight into a kick straight to the jaw, flinging him backwards a good distance and causing him to land hard on his ass. He looks up terrified as Wheatley now has a foot firmly planted on his left leg. “Hey, Y/N--Femur, Fibula an’ Tibula, or the kneecaps?” Wheatley asks.

 

As much as you wanted to say something, hell, anything, you couldn't. Even after everything, you wasn’t going to ask Whe to hurt Bel, it just didn’t feel right…. Yeah he was, is, an asshole and a racist pig, but you felt like if you did this… went out of your way to get back at him.. It’d make you no better than him. You sigh and reply, “Whe, Bel isn’t worth all this effort. I know he’s a piece of shit, and you know he’s a piece of shit… we don’t need to stoop down to his level Whe. I think he’s learned his lesson, I mean he looks like he’s going to piss himself if you look at him cross-eyed. So let’s just go get some ice-cream, have fun, and enjoy the rest of the day together, yeah?” You end with a smile.

 

Wheatley lets out a small sigh and nods, “You're right…..” Wheatley looks Bel dead in the eye and their voice goes low, “If I ever hear about you contacting Y/N ever again after today…” Whe chuckles darkly. “Well, to say you won’t like the results will be an understatement. So, here is my parting gift to you~” With that Whe slams their foot right into Bel's crotch so hard it actually scoots him a few inches away.

 

Wheatley looks at their knuckles and sigh, “Damnit, Bel, I got your blood on me…” They wipe it off on their tank top, “Still, I was gonna chuck this tank top anyways.” They grab their hoodie and pulls it back on, being careful not to get blood on the outside--somehow, their legs are free of Bel blood.

 

Al goes back to his usual size and climbs up Whe's leg to her hoodie and back in his warm spot. Wheatley turns to Brassberry and says, “Hey, Brassy; you can drop the skull things now. I don’t think Mr. Waste of Oxygen is going to be able to walk for at least half an hour, if not more.”

 

His magic was able to hold up for hours (so long as he wasn’t going full size that is) but that didn’t make it any easier to control and maintain multiple sentient magical beings, brought into existence from the void tied to him solely by his magic, for long periods of time. So it was a relief to call off the ‘hounds’, so to speak. “Sure,” Brasberry replied letting them vanish back to the void from whence they came. He really wanted to murder the bastard slowly, but Y/N wouldn’t like that, god you were too sweet for your own good. This world would walk all over you if not for people like Wheatley and Brassberry to protect you from others. You may be capable, but your too sweet to do what needs to be done when push comes to shove

 

December comes running over dressed to the nines in her shiny, skimpy yellow dress and golden bangles around her arms. She kneeled down over Belvedere and her high pitched voice crooked, “Oh my! Bel-Bel, what happened here?!” You held in a snicker at his response. Belvedere was hunched over holding his privates while he painfully responded, “Nothin’ just got mugged. Y’know how it is in the city. Give me a minute here and we’ll leave.”

 

Han Han comes running back ready to reclaim his spot on the booby throne.  “Mommy, mommy, pick me up~” He calls gently tugging on Y/N's pants to get her attention.



Y/N:     [bends over and lets YanYan climb onto her hand. She then proceeds to place him back on her breast, he then nestles down where he was previously. Now Y/N gently takes Whe’s arm in hers.] Let’s go meet Metta and Alphys now Whe, I’ll even be your lovely escort for the evening. [she winks]

 

Wheatley:     [winks back, smiling and relaxed] [their knuckles are sore and a bit red from beating Bel, but it's a price they're willing to pay] If you insist, my lady. [silly lil eyebrow wiggle]

 

Curley:    [gentle pats Wheatley’s cheek] Don't forget the space hoodies you wanted to get.

 

Wheatley:    [uses free hand to gently pat the top of Curley’s head] I can come back for them later, sweetie. Besides, I've got clothes for you all to pay for that won't be back in Stock for awhile. [Points at the weeb section (bc forreal Metta totes has that)] Five bucks says Alphy is there.

 

Y/N:     [giggles] I’m not taking that bet because I would lose. [looks at the section, it’s kinda large] You think we’ll find her in there?

 

Wheatley:   [nods] I'll shout something to get her attention; so, cover your ears.

 

Y/N:     [Does so]

 

Wheatley:    [clears throat] MEW MEW KISSY CUTIE 2 IS BETTER THAN MEW MEW KISSY CUTIE 1!!!!!!!

 

[enraged dino noises from the far end of the anime section]

 

Wheatley:      Found her. [Smug af]

 

~~~~Time skip of I’m too lazy to think of anything (honorary titties mention :3c )~~~~

 

Y/N:     [Alphys looked pretty miffed, don’t mess with the otaku’s anime, rule number one man!] Uh, hey Alphys we’re sorry about the whole Mew Mew Kissy Cutie thing, we just needed to find you and it was the quickest way. Besides I think everyone knows the original is the best. [Y/N smiles softly, trying to defuse the otaku bomb]

 

Alphys:   [nods] Yeah, I know… [gives Wheatley a hard look]

 

Wheatley:   [shrugs] You can't deny that while the plot sucked, the outfits and color scheme were better than the first movie. [Wheatley why do you do this--]

 

Alphys:   [Opens her mouth to retort, but nothing comes out] [huffy sigh] You're lucky I like you…

 

Wheatley: [cheeky grin] I know. [Suddenly spots The Dress] [points, smol gasps] Y/N. Oh my god. That's, like… You gotta try that on.

 

Alphys:  [notices The Dress] [nods agreement, if still a little salty] Y-yeah!!! I was texting you about it earlier!!!

 

Y/N:     [face flushes, oh Christ not Wheatley too, like Alphys trying to set her up wasn’t enough. Though Wheatley probably just thought she would genuinely look good in it, Y/N couldn’t help but think they were in cahoots with one another.] I-I’m not s-so sure that’s my kinda style? [Wow, great excuse Y/N, you said it more like a question and you stuttered… A+ right there. God, why did public outings bring out the worst in you?]

 

Wheatley:   [has a minor concern, n it shows on their face] If you don't feel comfortable trying it on, you don't have to. But the color makes your eyes stand out… Yanyan, help me out here!!! [Obvious thinking that YanYan will approve of the dress]

 

YanYan:     {Looks the dress over, his eyes narrowing and scanning it in its entirety. Then he speaks in his usual tone but a bit more comforting} As much as I loath to admit it, she’s right. You’d look absolutely stunning in it, and you know I would never sugar-coat anything for the sake of feelings.

 

Wheatley:   [gets stiff and very very still at the misgender. They know he doesn't know, which is why they haven't fully snapped at him for it] Yan, hon, I'm not a girl.

 

Y/N:     [Oh, great YanYan just misgendered Whe. This is why people need to practice using they/ them pronouns until they are told what gender the person identifies as, if they identify as a gender at all. Y/N didn’t know how to deal with the situation, she couldn’t really do much anyway, but she really hoped that Yan would be okay. Partially due to the fact he was currently sitting on her boob and thusly should Whe get angry and lash out Y/N’s tits were toast, but mostly because she feared for his safety in general.]

 

YanYan:     {He raised an eyebrow (bonebrow?) at that, he’s never heard of someone identifying as something different than what they were anatomically. He supposed it made sense though that some people felt like their bodies are their bodies .} Oh? Um, I’ve never heard of, well, you know this kind of situation. I may not be a nice bitty, but I certainly don’t mean to offend people in that manner. I might be a bitch but I’m not that kind of a bitch.  

 

Wheatley:   [relaxes just a bit, though the apology seemed… false, somehow. They'll assume that that's just Yanyan’s normal sass shining through, though.] That’s good to hear. I use they/them pronouns, so… don't fuck that up. [Notes Y/N’s tense-ness and just realises that she was probably worried they'd, like, karate chop her tits to slap Yanyan about. The mental image is hella amusing, but they keep their amusement off their face] [raises an eyebrow at Y/N, nodding their head towards the dress] Do you want to try it on?

 

Y/N:     [looks at it, it does look nice, then she turns to Whe and says with a smile] Sure, as long as you promise not to slap my tits off. [She could tell that Whe probably knew what she was thinking earlier and so she played it off with a wink and laugh.]

 

Wheatley:   [snorts, amused] The Boob Brigade is in the way; but yeah, I wouldn’t lay a finger on your if it made you uncomfortable. [Places a hand out for aforementioned boob Brigade bitties to climb on to] Yan, Brassy, she can't try the dress on if y’all are in her cleavage.

 

YanYan & Brassberry:     {[It’s with great reluctance that they move, but it was only for a second and on the plus side they’d get to see Y/N in that dress after she got done so win-win]}

 

Y/N:     [Giggles] Really Whe, the Boob Brigade? What are they, protectors of the silky mounds? [full on laughs now]

 

Alphys:   [thoroughly amused by the Boob Brigade thing] [Grabs the dress hanger thing, holds it and the clothing out for y/n] H-he really you go! Let me know i-i-if you need a different size…

 

Wheatley:   [holds the Boob Brigade bitties close to their chest, so they don't accidentally drop them]

 

Y/N:     [heads to the dressing room, a little anxious but otherwise fine. Goes into one of the free rooms. Closes the door, takes a deep breath, gets undressed besides her bra and underwear, then comes the moment of truth!.......IT FITS! HAHA! Also, it’s pretty high cut and shows a nice amount of cleavage, Alphys was right the guys would be all over her in this, it is a HUGE step from her usual clothes that rarely show anything. She opens the door a crack and sticks out her head.] Um, hey, guys, I’m all changed if you wanna come look. [She says loudly so as to be heard over the usual murmur of a store]

 

Alphys and Wheatley:   [So much happy and pure exitement] [stands near the stall door so she donut hafta show off to others if she donut want to] Let's see it!!! [Pure happy exite, the so happy for her like u cannot believe. Alphys’s tail is wagging, that's how happy she be]

 

Y/N:     [Takes in a deep breath and opens the door] So…. how do I look? [a bit anxious/worried but excited]

 

YanYan:     {Eyes are sparkling and his face speaks for him, ‘she’s beautiful!’}

 

Brassberry:     [If he wasn’t enamored before, which he was, he most definitely is now! HOT DAMN!]

 

Wheatley:   [soft whispers] Holy shit… [quick takes a picture of her with their cellphone, n then shows her the pic so she can see how gosh darn cute she is in the dress] You're buying this. Hell, Metta will probably give you the damn thing for free; it looks really good on you. [Suddenly notice where Brassys eyes are] Brass, sweetie, her eyes are on her head. [Amused teasing, not trying to make Y/N or Brass feel uncomfortable]

 

Alphys:   [would be doing the anime nosebleed if that were at all physically possible-- that dress looks very, very good on Y/N] I'll pay for it for you, i-if you don't have the money on hand for it. [Happy dino is happy]

 

Y/N:     [She’s stiff and her face is red, Y/N.exe has stopped working.]

 

Mettaton:     {rolls in looking as fabulous as he can in this form} Oh nonsense darlings~ You all came on my invite after all, anything you get I’ll personally cover! Consider it a gift for being a bridge between humans and monsters, and for being friends with Alphys, of course ~

 

Wheatley:   [Wheatley dot exe has stopped working] Um… Metta, that’s… a rather large gift. I don't know about Y/N and Alphys’s purchases, but the stuff I’ve picked easily costs about $300… I can't let you pay for all of that. [Wheatley is V good at keeping track of monies]

 

Mettaton:     {laughs a bit in a friendly way} I promise dear, this is nothing to me, monetarily speaking. I have so much on my schedule, I’m doing a world tour in a few months, darling money is nothing, friends are everything. You just started working for Alphys in a very important program, one that could change the way humans view monsters. The least I can do is pay for your items dear~

 

Wheatley:   [shakes head no] I can't allow you to do that. I get where you're coming from, really I do, but I cannot accept that. It’s… just a large sum of money. A very large sum of money, based on my prior paychecks. I'm not comfortable with you paying it all.

 

Mettaton:     How about I pay half? Or you could owe me a favor? {Determination, also the favor thing is not said or meant in a creepy way at ALL}

 

Wheatley:   [slowly nods] What would the favor be? [They haven't chosen either yet, they would just like to know--it's gotta be worth $300]

 

Mettaton:     Well, for instance, being a monster SOUL in a robot body and being a celebrity makes me a target for… well the monster hate groups, monster haters acting alone, religious zealots who think monsters are demons who need to be wiped from the Earth, etc. Because of this I don’t like hiring monster body-guards, they’d be too at risk and they’d be much easier to… dispose of due to our lack of physical matter and our SOUL’s being much weaker, but on the opposite side of the coin I don’t know many, well personally none actually other than Frisk who is a bit young for that, humans I can trust. I have an upcoming concert and if you’d like you could be on security detail?

 

Wheatley:    … I'll have to ask the skelebros I live with. Though, I'm sure it won't mess with Alphys’s program too much… right? [Makin sure they ain't overstepping boundaries with Alphys]

 

Alphys:   [nods] You won't be messing with it at all, so long as all the Papyruses know.

 

Wheatley:   [smiles] Well then, keep me posted. Here-- [scribbles cell number on a scrap of paper they found in their pocket and hands it to Metta] Text me the details later. Sometimes folks like me will need a permit to bodyguard, and you might want to have a chat with your lawyer or whatever to make sure it's not breaking the law. [Makes a mental note to DEFINITELY not get any bad press between now and the concert]

 

Mettaton:     {hold onto the paper in one of his hands since he doesn’t have pockets, and lights blink happily} Fantastic darling~ I shall discuss all the legal issues that could arise, or that need to be handled, with my lawyer.  By the way, he’s a cat monster, often wears a tux now, and he goes by the name ‘Lawyerpants’. I’m just telling you in case you ever run into him that way you can recognize him. He used to be the only worker at my Glamburger restaurant Underground… I wasn’t the nicest monster back then and he took the brunt of a lot of my displeasure… when we came up here I wanted to make it up to everyone. So, I started with him. I asked him what he wanted to become and he said a lawyer, after much sweating and awkward stuttering, so I paid for his tuition and when he got out of Law school, surprisingly fast might I add, I hired him on as my lawyer. He’s a lot more confident than he used to be…. Sometimes I think about the difference in how he used to act from how he acts now and I think ‘My God, I’m a horrible monster.’ I ruined his life and made him into a nervous wreck, but somehow I still hope that I can make amends for that.  

 

Wheatley:   [they didn't really ask for a backstory but hey it fits Metta’s personality so they don't bother making a face at it; besides, he looked very guilty about his past self’s actions] I think that the fact you're trying speaks volumes. Maybe ask him about getting a therapist--The one I go to is very monster friendly, or so I've heard from her monster patients. She's a sweetheart, I think you'd like her. (Your turn)

 

Mettaton:     {voice uncertain} I’ll try talking to him about it. {does a complete 180 with his tone and overall vibe} Ahem, now I believe that we have purchases to make and then some ice cream to get?~

 

Y/N:     [Y/N. exe back online, god that was really tense and awkward, she didn’t know what to say so she didn’t and stood still, probably looking like a store mannequin from what very little movement she did make]

 

Wheatley:   [nods] Icecream sounds fantastic. [They're paying for their own icecream, so help them god] Y/N, you find everything you wanted?

 

Y/N:     [Nods] I left all my stuff up front to pick up later, very convenient by the way, anyway, the only thing I need to do now is change back and add this to the items and I’m ready Freddy! Oh and when I get my stuff back on let me return the brave sentinels to the silky mounds myself okay? [She sticks out her tongue and winks before heading back to change]

 

Wheatley:   [snorts] The Boob Brigade is eagerly awaiting their noble steed. [Says that loud enough so that Y/N can hear it over the store music]

 

Al:  [just kinda done with all the things and just wants to go home and decompress. He's pretty good at hiding it, tho]

 

Y/N:     [Comes back dress draped over one arm, happy as a clam, whatever the fuck that means] Alright, let’s get these two noblemen back to their posts. [Holds out her hand for YanYan and Brassberry] Can’t leave these sacred hills unguarded for long [snorts]

 

YanYan & Brassberry:     {[Both eagerly get onto her hand and let her return them to her bosom, all is right with the world]}

 

~~~~Timeskip brought to you by the Boob Brigade, may eternal sunshine forever fall upon the silky mounds~~~~



Y/N:     Yeah, um, so just give me a double scoop of pistachio, and could you put chocolate sauce on it? Thanks! [Pistachio is the ultimate flavor. She pays and leaves a five dollar tip, the owner of the ice cream parlor they went to is a monster. A bunny, with a big friendly smile and an overall great personality, but they seem to be the only customers in there despite that. One could argue it was the weather, but while it wasn’t the warmest, it wasn’t the coldest, it wasn’t raining, and the wind wasn’t blowing, not to mention in the city there is always those few weird people who eat ice cream outside in the snow and of course pregnant people, and random cravings, and depression onslaughts… okay the more Y/N thought about it the more sense it made to have an ice cream parlor be open all year, but still.]

 

YanYan and Brassberry:     {[Clear their throats]}

 

Y/N:     [blushes she almost forgot] Um, do you by any chance have anything Bitty sized?

 

The Bunny (name tag reads ‘Nicecream Guy’):     [Nods]     Actually, yes I do! I didn’t want to leave anybody out! And since I know it can be draining on them to have to maintain a ‘full-sized’ form for long periods of time, I didn’t want them to have to do it for ice cream of all things. So, I got a few thimbles to act as a kind of bowl and doll spoons to act as, well, spoons.

 

YN:     That’s great, one thimble full of chocolate chocolate-chip please! [Softly smiles]

 

Nicecream Guy:     Alrighty! [gets out a thimble and then two doll spoons, seeing the two, ahem, ‘titty Bitties’. Then using a small spoon he scoops out some of the requested ice cream and fills the thimble.] That’ll be one dime please~

 

Y/N:     [He went through all that extra trouble for one dime? Yeah, it was a lot less than a normal order but it took a lot more work to do and special things you wouldn’t normally find in an ice cream parlor, like thimbles and doll spoons. She thought it should at least be 10% the price of normal or something. She gave him $10.10] Keep the ten for the extra trouble. [Happily takes the thimble with ice cream and two embedded doll spoons in her other hand and sits down at a table where Metta is waiting, since he can’t eat. Once she is sitting she hands the thimble to the Boob Brigade.] Now, you two be careful or you are never eating on my boobs again. I don’t want to get all sticky.

 

Wheatley:   [is very amuse about the Boob Brigade icecream thing] Al, you want some?

 

Al:   [headshake no-- he doesn't like much sweet things] [he's sitting at the table across from Metta, but he keeps his eyes on his packmates]

 

Curley:   [is up by the counter, patiently waiting for Wheatley] Can I have some of this? [He pat the mint chocolate chip flavor]

 

Teacup:   Can I have this one?? [Happily pointing at the chocolate flavored icecream] Violet and I can share it!!!

 

Violet:   [just kinda nods sleepily from his perch on Whe’s shoulder] Tea n’ I can share…

 

Wheatley:  [soft smiles] Yes, you may all have some. [Points to the strawberry icecream] I'd like two scoops of strawberry, and bitty-sized servings of mint chocolate and double chocolate. [Nice cream guy is a sweetheart, they gonna give him a really good tip]

 

Nicecream Guy:     [Nods] Okay one normal double scoop strawberry for you, and two bitty sized servings; one mint chocolate chip, and one double serving of chocolate for the two sweeties to share! [Works on the order, starts with the Bitties first, since theirs is the most awkward to handle -though he doesn’t mind at all-. Sets theirs aside and then gets the double scoop of strawberry for Whe.] Would you like chocolate sauce on your ice cream? (your turn ^^)

 

Wheatley:   No, but thank you for offering. [Polite, happy smiles] How much do I owe you? [They gonna give him a tip double the price of the icecream]

 

Nicecream Guy:     $5.20, please [smiles] (also, your turn, plus sorry it took me a while T.T)

 

Wheatley:    [gives him $10.50, smiling warmly at him] Keep the change. [Picks up the goods and sets it all on the table next to Y/N. The bitty icecream is immediately surrounded by the bitties who wanted it]

 

Alphys:   [doesn't get icecream bc she's on a diet, but she's chill with it bc she's got a granola bar instead] So, what happened in the store? Wheatley’s knuckles are all red… [oops Noone told her, Whe’s bad]

 

Wheatley:   [gives Y/N a look like “should I tell, or should you?”] (Your turn, and it's fine uwu)

 

Y/N:     [Looks away] It’s your knuckles Whe, and personally I would care if the entire freaking world knew about what happened. Alphys already knows why I was homeless, hell, she had to pick me up at the fucking park! [Y/N wasn’t going to talk about this again herself in public anytime soon, but what others did was there own business. She continued to sensually lick her ice cream.]

 

Wheatley:   Mkay… [leans back, eating their icecream] Long story short, I beat the shit out of Y/N’s sleazy ex.

 

Alphys:  [blinks twice] … Why did you hurt him?

 

Wheatley:   He was harassing Y/N. If he knows what's good for him, he won't do it again. Speaking of that-- [scribbles their cell number down and gives it to Y/N] There's my cell number. Call me if the fucker tries to talk to you again.

 

Y/N:     [Takes it and puts it into her pocket] I’ll text you later for the number to the, uh, ‘specialist’. Just in case I ever decide to go to someone and talk about this. [Licks around the rim of her cone before it starts to melt down it.] Also, in Whe’s defense they stopped when I asked them too. He isn’t worth the trouble….[glances downwards] Y’know I used to think that anybody could change, even the worst person, if they really tried. I used to think that, nobody would want to do horrible things to another person; that somehow it was just a direct result of how the world saw them, their upbringing, an untreated mental illness, lack of support, or some combination of those….. I was a fool, a naive fool. I allowed things to happen because I believed I deserved them for some reason or that the person doing them didn’t mean anything by it… All my life I’ve been a spineless, weakling who was nothing more than an outlet for sadistic people people I thought I could help them, I thought I could cure them…. Sadists can’t be cured, they may apologize afterwards but they never really mean it. Good people are broken everyday all for their enjoyment.[Her voice tightens] I. Refuse. To. Be. Their. Victim.

 

Wheatley:     [Proud smiles, like Y/N is their presh bab friendo who just dumped a sicko] Takes a lot of guts to admit that to yourself, and even more to stay out of another cycle of it. ‘M proud of you.

 

Alphys:         [is the most proud dino, like omg] [gentle sets a hand onto Y/N’s, looking at her with concern too] W-w-well, I-I’m glad you’re away from him n-now. You deserve t-to be happy.

 

Y/N:     [Smiles] Th-thanks, so…. We goin’ to change the subject now or just watch me awkwardly, and sexually for some reason -hey don’t laugh down there Brassy I’ve done it since I was like three, and I swear to God you make a sexual joke out of that and you will NOT be riding on my boobs for a month mister- eating ice cream? [finishes the thought like the whole Brassy incident didn’t even happen]

 

Wheatley:     [shrugs] I dunno… I’m gonna be visiting some friends of mine after this. They work in the tattoo shop here; one of my mates’ll probably want to sharpie-ink a new tattoo design to me before testing it on clients. You wanna stop by and meet them?

 

Alphys:         [went a little bit pale at the mention of tattoos--she Donut Like Pain, but also body art is pretty so she's like in Tattoo Limbo] U-uhm… Undyne m-m-mentioned w-wanting to see them a-a few d-d-days ago… C-could you w-wait to go u-until I know i-if she wants to go today?

 

Wheatley:     [shrugs] If she’s got a car and can handle me going to the rest of my shopping places, then it’s fine.

 

Alphys:         [sends the text quickly--donut wanna have Whe or Y/N wait for a response, after all]

 

YanYan:     {mischievous smile on his face, he ‘accidently’ spills a bit of ice cream on Y/N. Being a devious lil bitch he looks to his brother, and instantly Brassberry gets where he was going with this. Y/N had said she didn’t want to get sticky, well if it was removed before it became a problem did it really matter the method of removal?}

 

Y/N:     [Thinks she feels something drop on her breasts, but she isn’t sure and she doesn’t necessarily want to keep call attention to her ta-tas, the girls had had enough attention for one day thank you very much. But then there was the unmistakable wet and warm feeling of somebody’s tongue swiping across her right breast and she jumped nearly dropping her cone. THE FUCK?! Oh, these two were sooo dead!]

 

Wheatley:     [just lOOSES THEIR SHIT] [Their head’s o nthe table, laughing their head off, somehow avoiding getting Icecream all over their own chest and face] Y-your f-f-face!!!! [Obviously, this is The Funniest Thing]

 

Alphys:         [is having problems keeping a striaght face--this is bEAUTIFUL--]

 

Y/N:     [face flushed, well shit] Well, you want me to lick your tit when you aren’t expectin’ it? [she teases, she can take a laugh at her expense in good fun]

 

Wheatley:     Only on Tuesdays. [it is Very Obvious That They are Joking, they donut wanna make her uncomfortable in any way shape or form]

 

Y/N:     [Winks and says] Well then, guess I’ll have to make an appointment.

 

Wheatley:     [would have done a spit-take right then and there if they’d been drinking] [so many giggle, like this is the funniest thing they’ve heard in ages] The Boob Brigade don’t look very happy about that.

 

Y/N:     Well maybe next time they’ll at least ask before assaulting me with their magical appendages [eats the cone]. So, when am I goin’ to be back at the house? [quickly backtracks realizing how rude that could’ve sounded] Don’t get me wrong this is fun, and I’m having a great time, it’s just that I haven’t left the skele-boys alone for longer than a few minutes since taking the job and I’m sure they have absolutely no idea what to do without me… Also, I’m a bit worried about what the state of the house will be when I get back.

 

Wheatley:     Well, it depends on when Alphys gets a response from Undyne--

 

Alphys:         [phone buzzes with a text message notification]

 

Wheatley:     … Well that was convenient.

 

Alphys:         [checks her phone] U-Undyne says that she’s on her way, a-a-and to wait for her. It w-won’t take her very long to get here, s-s-so I can take Y/N home when she comes. M-Mettaton, do you want to tag along with Y/N? O-or Wheatley? Or d-do you have to go back to the store?

 

Mettaton:     Well, of course I would love to see my new friend off to her home Alphys!~

 

Y/N:     [Looks down to the Boob Brigade] You guys done with the sweets? Or you wanna use it to sneak another lick on my silky mounds? [Brassy looks like he may answer] Answer that and I swear by all the flavors in this parlor I will end you!

YanYan:     {laughs at his brother’s expense} Yes we’re done.

 

Y/N:     [looks to the Nicecream Guy and calls out] Hey! What do we do with the empty bitty thimbles and doll spoons?

 

Nicecream Guy:     [Smiles and politely responds] Above  the trash bin there is a little basket for them to go into! At the end of the day I make sure to give them a thorough cleaning with hot water and soap, it’s not expensive to replace them, but I’d like to reuse them until I need to buy replacements.

 

Wheatley:     [polishes off the rest of their icecream, and then scoops up all the human-sized bowls n spoons] Hey Y/N, can you tell your excitable blueberry Sans something for me?

 

Y/N:     [Places YanYan & Brassberry’s dirty ‘dishes in the specified area, looks to Whe] Sure! What is it?

 

Wheatley:     Tell him that Orange is doin’ alright, and that if he wants my cell number to send me memes or whatever he can have it. Also, tell ‘Tale’s brother that I called him a punny nerd. [puts the human-sized bowls and spoons in the trash, and presses a smooch to the top of Teacup’s head before scooping up the bitty-sized stuff and taking care of that]

 

Teacup:     [happy blushes, he’s such a sweetheart like omg]

 

Alphys:         I c-can give them y-y-your number, i-if you’d like…

 

Wheatley:     [head shake no] It’s cool, Alphys; besides, if Y/N gives it to them I can tease the skeletons about it later~ [they wouldn’t really, but they just need an excuse to have Y/N give blueberry their number bc like forreal they needa pester him about Orange]

 

Y/N:     [Nods] Okay I’ll relay the message Whe, oh and I’ll make sure Blueberry gets your number! I’m sure he’d love a new human friend to talk to!

 

Mettaton:     If he’s anything like a certain someone I know he’d be ecstatic about it~  

 

Wheatley:     [smiles happily] Orange was talking about his Sans this morning, so I’m sure he would be. [just leaves off the fact that Orange was basically like “if u hurt my bro i wILL END YOU--” bc they’d shown interest in wanting to meet him]

 

Undyne:     [walks into the icecream shop, spottin Alphys and walking over] What’s up, punks? [happy Undyne is happy, but Undyne is also intimidating as fUCK--]

 

Y/N:     [Jumps a bit at first from the unexpected booming voice of the, oddly beautiful, fish monster. Quickly regains composure though and smiles brightly at the new comer, this must be Alphys’ SOULmate Undyne.] Well, gettin’ the shit scared out of me for one, other than that just hanging out with some of the coolest people ever!

 

Alphys:         [huge smile, like obviously this Dino is super in love with her fish wife] H-hi Undyne!!!

 

Undyne:     [claims a seat next to Alphys, draping an arm across her dino’s shoulders] So, what’s the plan? We all goin’ to the tattoo place, or are we splitting up?

 

Wheatley:     Splitting up. Y/N is going to go with Alphys and Metta so she can get dropped off, and you and I are going to the tattoo parlor. [just starts tappin out a beat on the table--they ain’t impatient, it’s just a habit of theirs] I’m ready to go whenever y’all are. [happy smiles, they’re so content]

 

Y/N:     [Looks over to Alphys] Well, I’m ready to head on out whenever you’re ready Alphys. You’re the one with the wheels after all. [Y/N stands next to the table not impatiently or anything, they’re just smiling and waiting]

 

Alphys:         [nods, getting up and givin Undyne a cheek smooch] I-I’m ready!!! [“doesn’t notice” that the kisu make Undyne have smol blushies]

 

Wheatley:     [relaxed lil wave] You guys have fun!!! Also, Y/N; you might not want the boob brigade to be in your brazier when you get home. Don’t want  your Sans-es getting jealous of your bitties, after all!!! [teasing tone, they’re just being a dork]

 

Undyne:     [still blushin bc Alphys did a PDA like omg this nERD CHILD--] S-see you at home, Alphy~ [jedi mind trick “these are not the blushy Undynes you are looking for; Undyne is not blushing, it is just a trick of the light”]

 

Y/N:     Whe, don’t be such a dork, they’re big boys I’m sure they can handle a little competition. [Giggles, the puns are contagious and she needs to stay away from UT Sans.] Anyway, I’ll text ya later! [holds the door open for MTT and Alphys, exits after them]