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Triple Dukes!

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Friday night, Ray was finally home and thanking god for a free weekend. It was his first weekend since he had his new legs. "God bless Kreiger and his strange but efficient ideas." At least now he didn't have to pay for anymore therapist and add more medical expenses to his already huge debt. He should make ISIS pay it, after all it was their fault. Sometimes Ray felt like he should just quit that place and sue them for all the shit that happened. But the payment was good, at least when he was a field agent, which he could go back on being. Maybe with his next field mission bonus he would import some new kimonos. And a well deserved vacation in Europe.
For now he would just enjoy a bath home. A nice and hot bath like he hadn't had in months. And then a nice night watching movies and drinking wine on his couch. Mostly because he still wasn't used to his new legs and he didn't think of a good excuse to give the people he knew, the first time it brought enough questions for a lifetime. He also had to test something before going out.
So there he was enjoying his friday night watching a nice Paul Newman movie with a cup of old wine and his cat on his lap when the bell rang.
Ray was begging not to be any of his co-worker to call him back to the office because of some stupid mission Malory received. He would tolerate a stupid ex-boyfriend it that meant it wasn't a co-worker. He would even tolerate is redneck brother, and his annoying wife.
“Please be Lana, please be Lana” Ray repeated to himself in hopes that will would change the outcome...
It was Archer, which was the worst scenario possible...Of course it had to be, who else would ruin his perfect Friday night, the same way he ruined everything on his life.

“What are you doing here?” asked Ray, after opening the door
“I don't know Ray, maybe fulfilling the promise I made”
“What promise?” asked confused Ray and Archer raised a eyebrow, then it hit him

Ray had totally forgot about that stupid blowjob promise Archer made. It was more a case of not believing Archer would made it, that and the fact that the promises was made long time ago. Not that he hated the idea, it that would backfire, sooner or later, but the idea of Archer, the Sterling-manslut-Archer sucking his dick was just too much to say no. Ray just really had to drink to be able to handle that, a lot.

"Come in.” He didn't want his neighbors to see Archer or listening to them having that discussion. "And be careful with Harvey?"
"Who is that, your gay boyfriend?"
"No asshole, my cat Harvey. Like I would let you come in if I had a boyfriend here"

Ray lead Archer to the living room and went to the kitchen to bring some wine. He would be really needing it and Archer could use a drink too.
Ray needed to re-evaluate the whole situation. Right now he had Sterling Archer in his living room, maybe playing with his cat, and babbling about a stupid blowjob promise he made more than a year ago.
On one hand, he hadn't been with anyone in a long time. the last time he got laid, he still could use his normal real legs, which was almost a 7 months ago. It was a on and off relationship with E.z. Ponder that could never be more than a casual fling since Ponder was married. Stupid asshole. Ray was never a fling for closet cases and Ponder wouldn't be the exception. It lasted a good half year with Ray always going to his hometown under the excuse of visiting his brother Randy on prison. Then because of stupid Archer he was again paralyzed and pretty damn ashamed of going out and finding someone. And he thought it was useless since he couldn't feel anything from the waist down.
Now, he has some new legs but is still gathering the courage to go out and have some fun. The problem was, he was too self-conscious of those new bionic legs. Maybe Archer would be the perfect person to test drive all the sex stuff he now could go back to doing.
On the other hand that was Archer, the same Archer who was always making his life a living hell and whose mother loved to make petty homophobic remarks. If only she imagined what her little precious Sterling was about to do.
But on a third hand the all situation was wrong and he would have to live with the knowledge that Sterling Archer sucked his dick because of a bet. It was just wrong, not a i-molested-a-blacked-out-Cyrill-in-a-bathroom-wrong but wrong.

Solution: he would have a drink with Archer finishing his movie, if possible, have a talk and see where the night gets him. That way he wouldn't feel guilty about anything.
Picking a bunch of bottles and another glass for Archer. Who was in his living room playing with his cat. Who wanted to give him a blowjob. Great.

Chapter Text

When Ray got into the living room, his cat jumped out of Archer's lap. And speaking of Archer, who gave him the right to keep seeing his movie without him. Asshole, but Ray didn't expect anything else from him anyway.

Hey! Who told you could could watch it without me!” complained Ray while pouring wine on both cups.

Me of course. So you like Paul Newman ah? I mean he is hot, and a good actor but he is no Burt Reynolds...” And there he with his stupid crush on Burt Reynolds.

I am going to ignore your opinion on that. And the fact that you just commented how hot your mother's ex boyfriend is.”

Ya forget about that. And don't tell mother I said that.”


Ray rolled his eyes. and sat by the other end of the small sofa as far from Archer as he could.

The movie kept going and Ray was silent while Archer seemed pretty entertained playing with his cat. It was like Archer was there for a mere visit of friends and not to suck him off, and driving Ray crazy. And the nerv of being there and drinking all his wine.

The movie was almost ending and neither of them said a word to each other that was not: “More wine”. The body language however had slowly changed. Archer had been getting closer to Ray was now right beside him, knees touching and arm rested behind him.

The silence was becoming more and more uncomfortable.

" You know, that stupid promise was made months ago." Said Ray to break the silence
"I know and meanwhile you got yourself paralyzed again."
"It was your fault shitface!"
"Ok whatever, you already had the chair anyway. So, since between you finding out about pam and getting paralyzed again, I really didn't had the time to go and suck you off."
"Archer everyone already knows about you and Pam."
“The thing Ray is that I want to...”
Ray chocked on his drink and stared at him in shock, maybe he had to much to drink and was starting to hear things. Or Archer somehow drank way to much and was starting to say things that didn't made sense.


I want to fulfill the promise I made, not necessarily suck you dick, moron. Now let's get this done.”


Archer jumped off the couch and kneeled before Ray. He seemed ready to do the deed right there right now, but Ray pushed him away, he would not do that in his newly decorated living room. He had spent too much money and time on it to even think about messing it.

So, he standed, helped Archer do the same and kissed him. Like the first time they kissed Archer tasted like alcohol, but instead of scotch it was the fine wine that Ray had served. Archer reciprocated the kiss, after all they did it before and it surely wasn't the worst thing he planned to do that night. With their lips locked, Archer put his hands on both sides of Ray's face, tracing his jaw and neck with his thumb till he had the hands on the other spy's shoulders. He tried to make Ray sit back on the couch, but he refused to do so.

Not here, I just cleaned and arranged everything.” said Ray almost out of breath.

As he was kissing, correction, making out with Archer, Ray led him to his room on the other side of the apartment. Along the way Ray started to play a bit with Archer's tie before taking it off, leaving it on the floor.

If you ruin my suit I will shoot your cyborg kneecaps.”

Ray ignored his protests and soon Archer's jacket and shirt joined the tie. Slowly and between more stripping (on Archer's side) they finally arrived at Ray's room.

It was a big room with a queen size bed, and much like the rest of the house it was decorated in a heavily japanese inspired fashion.

Archer threw Ray to his bed and started undressing Ray, who was still in his pajamas pants.

Leaving only the pants Archer was staring at Ray's crotch. At first Ray founded that normal, after all he was almost sure this would be the first time Archer was in direct contact with a dick that wasn't his own.
"For someone that was so eager to start at the room you sure are taking your time.” mocked ray
“Shut up Ray, I am just afraid that your cyborg dick is going to explode, shot me or do some weird shit”
.Only Archer to ruin everything
"I'm not a cyborg! Goddamit Archer, stop throwing a fit! My dick is normal, so shut up and suck it"
Ray was quickly losing his temper
"How do you know it wont make anything weird, did you had it tested?” Ray raised a eyebrow at that question, and Archer kept going before he could ” … Nevermind, dont tell me, I don't want to know about your gay sex life"
"My gay sex life was pretty great before you PARALYZED ME FOR THE SECOND TIME, ASSHOLE!" Shouted Ray.
"I thought you weren't one to hold grudges."
"I swear Archer, are you going to suck me off or do I need to start fucking you little trouty mouth till cry and beg for more? "
Protested Archer ”Now be patient, I never did this before."

Archer took a deep breath before finally moving Ray's briefs waistband and take a peek. Archer felt a lot calmer now that he knew Ray's prick was a pretty normal one, two balls, a shaft, some pubic hair nicely groomed, and no creepy robotic parts or signs that it would explode once he put it on his mouth. Archer looked at Ray's face that had a “I told you so” expression.
Now there was no excuse for Archer, not even his pride. In that situation Archer's pride was at stake. If he didn't do it, he wouldn't keep his word and Ray could tell everyone. If he did it in a sloppy way just to get it done Ray would hold that against him and he didn't trust Ray. He had to do it and do it right. No other option.

Archer you can do it, just think of it as a lollipop, a skin covered lollipop. Bad analogy! God I need another drink ” He thought to himself. “You can do it.”
Another deep breath and Archer went for. He started it slowly, a little clueless about what he should do. He tried to think about the things he liked when he was on the receiving end but in that moment it was all very fuzzy. Maybe he should keep going something and see if Ray has any demands. He hesitantly licked along Ray's length then looked up to Ray trying to find a approving look. Not finding what he was looking for, tried the same thing a few more times.

Ray didn't seem to react much, he was still getting used to “his new dick” and it felt a little more sensitive than usual, but Archer was sloppy and he just couldn't ignore that.

Goddamit Archer, just do it right! How can someone be so bad at sucking dick!” That was a blow on Archer's pride, despite what Pam had said, and what Ray was saying, Archer always considered himself a capable and skilled lover. He just wasn't used to it.
“Ray! I get it, but I am trying. Not everyone here has PhD in gay.”

Try harder!” Ray. “Do whatever you like receiving instead of ! Just do something, use more tongue and hands. ”

Archer tried to do as he was told, using his tongue to tease and from Ray's little whimper he could deduce he was finally doing something right. With that assurance, Archer actions grew bolder and bolder. He was now licking Ray from base to tip, teasing, using his hands to help him.

Ray let a moan escape from his lips. So long since he last felt like this that he could easily ignore it was Archer who was making him feel like this, but he couldn't do that. The fact that it was Archer only made the situation better. Also Ray had to admit Archer's looked great sucking dick.

Yes, like that. You look so good sucking cock.”

The hand that before was resting on Archer's dark hair now was grabbing it with strength. Ray's hips were moving and Archer had to use his arms to restrain Ray's movements a bit since he was starting to choke.


Maybe Ray's moans, the alcohol, or the make out session were to blame, but the truth was all that together made Archer hard. Using one of his hands, he made his way through his own pants to free himself. Later he would give two thoughts about what he did this night.

You're getting good at this. Just keep doing it.”

Ray's own hip movements were also stronger to the point that it was impossible for Archer to stop them. Goddamn those bionic legs and their inhuman strength. That little fuck was trying to fuck his mouth, and there wasn't much he could do besides relaxing his throat, breath through his nose and hope his gag reflex didn't kick in.

Feels so good.... if only people at ISIS could see...”

Archer moaned, his throat vibrations sending all way up Ray's spine. 

Meanwhile he would focus on himself. With the same free hand he began to stroke his own length. Shuddering at each stroke, he, for once, was thankful Ray was using his mouth or else the whole building would hear him moan like a cheap whore. Not in a million years would Archer admit that he was jacking off from sucking a dick

It didn't take much time till he felt Ray tense underneath him and reach his climax.

Thanks for the warning Ray” contested Archer between coughs, cleaning his mouth with the back of his hand.

I'm sorry. And don't you dare spit on the carpet!”

No you're not sorry, asshole. ”

You are right I am not. Now let me help you. Come sit here.”

Archer did as he was told, and sat by the end of the bed, Ray behind him and replacing Archer's hands with his own. Archer didn't even have the time to process the fact that man hands other than his own (or Lana's man hands) were touching his dick.

Fuck Ray” said Archer “This is way too gay.”

As opposed to you sucking my dick just seconds ago” Ray smirked and blew behind Archer's ear, making him shudder. He started to stroke slowly, taking pleasure in which single reaction Archer's body had. It made Ray feel in control.

Yeah... it was a deal... nothing gay about it...”

Archer was bucking into Ray's hands, needing more contact, desperate for release. As much as it hurted him pride to admit he was at Ray's mercy. Each stroke made Archer shudder, slowly melting under his hands, and soon he came.


So...” started Archer still trying to catch his breath

... now you own me nothing. You can stay if you want to. I'm just going to take a bath” Ray said while picking the clothes from the floor, and using them to clean his hands. “ You can use one of my pajamas, I think I have one that will fit you. In the bathroom you will also have a unopened toothbrush.”

"If I sleep here, I'm not going to wake up to find your cock in the sink, am I?"
"Where did you get that idea? That's fucking disgusting."
"Never mind"


While Ray took his bath, Archer went to the living room to pick his clothes, not wanting to think a lot about what he just made, he distracted himself by playing with Harvey. It wasn't working out that well cause he couldn't just erase everything that happened. Thinking about it it wasn't that unpleasant, just different from what he used to.

Ray took his bath quickly and Archer went in to take his own.

When Archer finished taking a bath, Ray was already in bed trying to sleep. He decided to spend the night there, he was too lazy to go home and to drunk to drive.


Ignoring the pajamas part, and wearing only a pair of underwear Archer laid besides Ray facing the opposite side of the room.

Ray!” called Archer without having a response “Ray! RAY!”

Yes Archer?” answered an annoyed Ray, he wanted to sleep, not deal with more stupid questions.

Let's say I kind of enjoyed this and would not mind to repeat it, would that make me gay?”

No Archer, it would not make you gay.” Ray couldn't help but roll his eyes at that question. Only Archer would think that giving another man a blowjob would make him instantly gay.“You still like woman right?”

Duh, of course!”k

Then no, Archer, kind of Bi-curious, bisexual at most but not gay. Now let me sleep.”

Ray! Ray!”


Don't tell anyone about this, specially not Mother and specially not Lana”