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This Confession Note Wasn't Meant for You

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             Taehyung was ecstatic Jimin was hanging out with him again.  He waited a long time for this moment.  But as they were walking side by side to the car, something seemed missing.  Taehyung turned to glance at Jimin.  Aside from the brown hair, Jimin was the same.  So why did it feel so weird?  Taehyung knew the reason the moment he saw Jimin’s car; Jimin didn’t try to hold his hand today.

             He wasn’t allowed to have that Jimin anymore.  Taehyung didn’t fully understand it but he missed the awkward hand holding.  Realizing that, Taehyung’s mood dimmed slightly.  Did he really want the old Jimin that was weirdly intimate with him? But friends weren’t supposed to act that way. 

            When they reached Seokjin’s apartment Taehyung felt his heart beat faster and his forehead start sweating because Jimin was finally rejoining them for movie night which meant unlimited cuddling.  He anticipated it so much that he practically pushed his way past Seokjin when the older opened the door and flung himself onto the love sofa. 

            “So what movie are we watching tonight?” Jimin moved into the room and slowly took off his shoes. His eyes lit up at the butter chips that were on the table. 

             “Pacific Rim,” Namjoon held up his laptop.

            “Oh my god.  Not again,” Jimin collapsed onto the floor beside Seokjin, “I really hoped that you somehow included a new movie into the rotation while I took a hiatus.”

            “Acutally, I was thinking of replacing one of them with the new Star Wars movie when a good quality stream comes out.”

            Jimin lied down with his head on Seokjin’s lap. Taehyung’s mouth dropped.  What was happening right now?  How did cuddle time with Jimin turn into not actually cuddling with Jimin?

            “Jimin,” Taehyung said suddenly.  All eyes turned to him.

            “Sit here,” Taehyung pointed at the empty space beside him. 

            Jimin froze for a second before getting up slowly and sitting stiffly beside Taehyung.  Taehyung looked over at him expectantly.  Jimin looked uncomfortable; he was gripping the bag of butter chips like it was a lifeline. 

            There was silence and no one moved.

            Yoongi coughed.  Namjoon shouted, “Yes the movie!” 

            Cuddle-less movie night. They were on their second movie and still Jimin was on his side of the sofa.  He hadn’t reached over to touch Taehyung at all.  He was wrapped in his own blanket.  Taehyung was getting maybe a little agitated at the turn of events. 

            Taehyung’s foul mood also spread to his comments on the movie. 

            “That guy is stupid,” he shouted bitterly as the main lead ran through the rain to find the girl. 

            “I thought you liked this movie. It’s honestly the only movie you like in the movie rotation,” Seokjin pointed out.

            “This doesn’t happen in real life,” Taehyung said briskly, “That guy is an idiot.”

            “I think it’s romantic.  Keep your comments to yourself,” Hoseok teased. 

            “This whole movie is stupid,” Taehyung crossed his arms. 

            “Settle down.  It’s just a movie. Can we just enjoy this without complaining?” Namjoon asked, “The good part is coming up.”

            “And why are we always watching the same movies?” Taehyung began angrily, “We see the same movies a hundred times.  Why don’t we watch anything new?  Why don’t we watch Saw or something?”

            “Ya!” Namjoon got up, “Kim Taehyung!  That’s a bit harsh isn’t it?  My taste in movies is good!”

            “Your taste in movies is shit,” Taehyung muttered.

            “You want to say that again?” Namjoon shouted.

            Taehyung was about to repeat what he said when he felt a hand grab his arm.  Taehyung looked over at Jimin who shook his head.  Taehyung shut his mouth and relaxed a bit.  He fell back into the sofa, “I’m sorry.  I don’t know why I said that.”

            “Just play the movie,” Seokjin grabbed the laptop and pressed play as Namjoon sat back down, huffing angrily.

            “Someone needs the D,” Yoongi muttered to Hoseok, who nodded his head in agreement.

            Jimin moved his hand back; Taehyung moved forward not wanting to lose contact.  Jimin’s arm shifted and fell around Taehyung's shoulder and pulled him closer.  Taehyung awkwardly scooted closer so he could put his head on Jimin’s shoulder, his hands falling into Jimin’s lap. 

            They didn’t say anything. But that was okay. 

 

            It’s been a few weeks since they became friends again and things were pretty much the same as before.  Jimin was back to sending Taehyung good morning and night texts.  He was back to waiting at Taehyung’s locker and occasionally eating at their lunch table, dividing his time between the dancer table and theirs.  But there was a slight shift now.  Taehyung didn’t know how to explain it.  Even though Jimin didn’t act intimate with him anymore, it felt like they were closer.

           Taehyung also started paying more attention.  He started noticing things.  He noticed how Jimin pursed his lips when he was upset and his eyes crinkled when he was genuinely happy.  He noticed that he tended to lean on others when he laughed.  These things were obvious before but now Taehyung could really point them out; he looked for it. Most importantly he was initiating and reciprocating this time around.  He waited for Jimin after school; he bought the other snacks during study period so Jimin could eat something when he went straight to dance after school. 

           Taehyung also started doing something else.  He doesn’t know what made him think of it at the time and he doesn’t know if it was stupid but every day for the last few weeks, Taehyung started leaving little notes in Jimin’s locker.  They always contained the most outrageous pick-up lines. Considering the situation it could’ve been awkward but Jimin didn’t mind at all; he actually found them quite amusing.  In fact he always seemed a bit happier whenever he met up with Taehyung after reading them. Cheesy pick up lines were now their thing. 

           “I think your hand fits perfectly in mine.” 

            Jimin looked over at Taehuing, “What are you saying?”

            “When you smile, I feel like a flower blossoming in winter because your smile is my sun.”

            Jimin blinked his eyes at Taehyung, “Okay?” He turned back to his book. 

            “I’m serious,” Taehyung began.

            “Okay dude,” Jimin took out something from his bag and threw a crumpled purple piece of paper in his face.

            “I liked this one though,” Taehyung opened it up and read it, “Because of you I laugh a little harder, cry a little less and smile a lot more.  It’s true!”  

            Jimin turned to him with a deadpan look, “I know.” But then he cracked a smile and Taehyung shoved him a bit. 

            “Your eyes are as blue as the sea after a storm,” Taehyung put a hand on Jimin’s shoulder with a serious look on his face.

            “My eyes aren’t blue you idiot.  You’re staring right at them.”

            “They were that one time you put on eye contacts.” 

            “Not the point of the pick-up line and it was only once.”

            “Fine then,” Taehyung looked into Jimin’s eyes and paused, “Your eyes are as brown as…poop.”

             Jimin gave him a disgusted look before turning to his book and letting out a disappointed sigh, “You’re so romantic.”

            “Like you can do better,” Taehyung picked up a post it and scribbled something down.  He looked up when Jimin didn’t say anything.

            Jimin inched closer; he put his hand on Taehyung’s and gently rubbed it, “If I had to choose between breathing and loving you…I’d take my last breath to say ‘I love you.’” 

            Taehyung’s breath caught in his throat and his heart started doing backflips.  The pick-up line was the cheesiest you could get.  But Jimin’s voice was soft and serious; his eyes were sparkling.  Were they always so nice to look at?  He could get lost in them even if they were the color of poop.   

            “That’s a pick up line, Taehyung.”  Jimin stared at him silently…meaningfully.  There was silence and then Jimin sat back in his chair.  He picked up his book and went back to reading like nothing happened.

            “S-s-smooth,” Taehyung stuttered.  He looked away but then turned his gaze back to Jimin. 

            His heart was beating; his tongue was stuck in his throat.  Taehyung realized slowly what was happening. A small smile appeared on his lips.  Simple things Jimin did made him smile.  Taehyung was literally smiling like an idiot just looking at Jimin sitting down.  Just the other day he smiled when he saw Jimin open his own locker door.  It was the small things that you never really notice that make the biggest impact.    

            He couldn’t pinpoint the exact moment he started feeling this way towards Jimin.  But like a light bulb turning on, it was all clear now.    

            “I think I like you,” Taehyung realized it the same time he said it.  And the realization terrified him.  Now that he said it, he knew it was true. It wasn’t the same type of delusional love he had for Jungkook.  He wasn’t infatuated by the other and he didn’t think Jimin was his soulmate.  It was simply the ‘let’s keep going for the rest of our lives’ kind of love.  And it was kinda of a big deal.              

           Jimin raised an eyebrow putting a finger in his book to keep his place, “Is that a pick up line?  What else is there to it?”

            “I have to go.  I---oh shit,” Taehyung jumped when his backpack fell from his shoulder and onto his foot, “God I just realized something.  Oh god. Shit,” Taehyung struggled to push in his chair.  He felt his feelings hit him like a truck; it was too much to handle.  Jimin was getting out of his chair with a concerned look on his face, “What’s up Tae.  Are you sure you’re okay?” 

            “I’m I uh..I well”  Taehyung cursed himself.  Was he stuttering? 

            “Tae, you look tired,” Jimin put a hand to his cheek, “Is it because you were running through my mind all night?”

            Taehyung almost spit in Jimin’s face.  The other was grinning at him, “Um…” Taehyung backed away, “I remembered that I forgot to remember to get the book from the place that’s you know…at the place.  I’ll catch you later,” Taehyung ran away from Jimin as fast as he could.  His heart was battering against his chest like crazy. 

            He stopped at his locker and let out a breath.  What was that back there?  Did he really like Jimin?  But didn’t he like Jungkook?  He tried to remember the way he used to feel whenever he saw Jungkook. He remembered the butterflies and the stuttering; he remembered the sweating.  Lately he didn’t do any of that with Jungkook.  Lately he didn’t even think about the freshman.  He was so happy to have Jimin back as his friend that nothing else could dampen his mood or take up a portion of his mind.  Everything was Jimin.  Everything.     

 

           The next morning, Taehyung stood in front of Jimin’s locker debating on what to do.  He wanted to confess; he wanted to unload all of the uneasy feelings in his chest.  He wanted Jimin to reciprocate those feelings so they could go back to the hand holding and the sunshine smiles and the romantic dates at dog cafes. 

          But he didn’t want to make this move and lose Jimin as a friend.  It took almost four months for Jimin to forgive him.  If Taehyung confessed all of a sudden, Jimin wouldn’t believe him.  It would almost be a repeat of his first mistake. He didn’t want to do anything to mess up what they had now. 

          It was so ironically twisted that the tables were turned.  Now he was the one pining over his feelings while Jimin didn’t like him that way at all.  The timing couldn’t be worse. 

         There was no other option: he had to focus his remaining feelings on Jungkook.  However, the more he tried to think about Jungkook the more he started comparing the other to Jimin.  And there was no one who could compare to Jimin.  Taehyung pushed away his confusing feelings to the back of his mind.  He tried to forget the way Jimin looked at him and the serious tone when he said ‘I love you.’  Taehyung really thought he meant those words when he said it.  He tried to ignore the butterflies in his chest as he turned away from Jimin’s locker. 

            He turned around so fast that he ran smack dab into someone.

            His eyes widened when he saw Jungkook looking right at him.  It was like déjà vu of the first time they met.  Taehyung gulped.   

            “Sorry hyung.  I wasn’t looking where I was going,” Jungkook got up and held out a hand for Taehyung to take. 

            “Uh…..” Taehyung grabbed Jungkook’s hand and was quickly pulled up.

            “Maybe I can make it up to you? I’m really sorry about that,” Jungkook’s hand touched his shirt and started patting him down.    

            “Did it burn you?” the freshman opened his backpack and took out a bunch of napkins, “I’m so clumsy, hyung. I’m really sorry.”

            Taehyung looked down and realized that Jungkook spilled some coffee on him when they bumped into each other.  So that burning in his chest….

            “Hyung, are you hurt?  You’re not saying anything,” Jungkook looked worried now as he started patting violently at the coffee stains on Taehyung’s shirt. 

            Taehyung shook his head and started patting his own shirt.  His hand accidentally touched Jungkook’s for a second. 

            “Let me make it up to you,” the younger smiled brightly at him.  They managed to dry the shirt as much as they could, “Jimin hyung said you wanted to see the Deadpool movie.  Do you want to go after school with me?”

            Taehyung’s mind went blank.  Did Jungkook just ask him on a date?  Was it that easy?  Back then he would’ve jumped at this chance.  He would’ve probably passed out in happiness. 

            Jungkook looked at him expectantly. Taehyung nodded hesitantly.  He tried to squash the guilt forming in his chest when Jimin appeared in his mind. 

            Jungkook smiled showing his nice row of small teeth and handed over his phone, “Let’s exchange numbers then?  We can meet at my locker after school?”

            Taehyung handed over his phone to the younger and murmured, “Sure.”  He was finally going to hang out with Jungkook.  It’s what he always wanted.  He wanted to feel happy, but he couldn’t.    

           

            Taehyung ran to the library where he knew Hoseok would be as they spent their free periods there.

            “Why do you look like you swallowed something bad?  What’s that on your shirt?”  Hoseok asked in way of greeting.

            “I’m going out with Jungkook today.  After school.”  

            “What?” Hoseok was coughing up his own spit as he eyed Taehyung, “You and Jungkook?  Why aren’t you happier?  Isn’t this what you always wanted?”

            “Of course it is,” Taehyung frowned as he tried to convince himself that.  He rubbed his chest, “Why do I feel like I’m having a heart attack.  It feels like it’s burning.”

            “Calm your heart,” Hoseok joked as he picked up Taehyung’s phone to play with it.

            Taehyung rubbed his chest once more before looking at Hoseok with wide eyes. 

            “Hyung.  I think my chest actually got burned,” he lifted his shirt for Hoseok to see.  There were nasty red marks splattered across his chest.

             The phone that was still in Hoseok’s hands buzzed and Hoseok’s eyebrows raised. He looked at the ID name and threw the phone back at Taehyung, “The Love of Your Life is calling.”  Taehyung blushed as he answered the call.

            “I’m in the library.  Yeah, I’ll be here for a while,” Taehyung said calmly before hanging up. 

            Hoseok snorted before going back to his work, “Now he’s even checking up on you?”

            Taehyung didn’t answer but Hoseok could see the definite blush on the younger’s face.  He was about to tease him further when someone interrupted them.

            “Hey guys,” Jimin plopped down on the seat beside Taehyung.  He nudged the younger in the arm but the other refused to acknowledge him.  His face was turning redder by the second. 

            Hoseok looked at Taehyung and then Jimin.  His eyes widened as he realized something, “Wait a second,” he was about to open Taehyung’s phone but the younger quickly took it back from him. 

            “Hey,” Jimin put an arm around Taehyung to get the younger’s attention.  Taehyung gave Hoseok a death glare before turning to Jimin.

            “Let’s go see Deadpool after school today.”

            Taehyung froze in his seat.  Why today out of all days?  What was fate doing to his life?

            “I can’t,” Taehyung turned back to his book. 

            Jimin nudged him, “Did you hear what I asked?  It’s Deadpool!  You’ve been waiting to see this for months.  It’s opening night and you don’t want to go?” Jimin lowered his head to book level so Taehyung was looking down at Jimin whose head was on the table.

            “I just..I’m busy.”

            “Busy?  Too busy for Deadpool?  Are you alright?  Is he alright?” Jimin directed the last question at Hoseok who just shrugged his shoulders, attention determinedly focused on his textbook. 

            “I’m sorry,” Taehyung felt guilt start pooling up in his body.  Why couldn’t he tell Jimin he was going with Jungkook?  They had an honest friendship now.  Why was he always so confused around Jimin? He never knew the right things to do or say. 

            “I see,” Jimin sounded disappointed.  He shifted in the seat beside Taehyung and opened up his own textbook. 

           

            He carried on a half decent conversation with Jungkook as they made their way to the movie theater by public transportation. They shared their love of anime and talked about school but somehow the topics kept on straying towards Jimin. 

          Oh yeah Jimin hates that professor.  I remember Jimin practicing that dance.  I’m trying to convince Jimin to watch that.

          “You must really like Jimin hyung huh?” Jungkook asked as once again Taehyung managed to include Jimin into their conversation. 

          “What?” Taehyung sounded offended. 

           “He told me he would come to the movie today.  Maybe we will see him,” Jungkook smiled and Taehyung felt sweat threaten to break the surface of his forehead.  Jimin was coming?  He was still going to see the movie?  Would he go by himself?  He bit his lip in worry as he imagined Jimin sitting by himself alone in the corner of the theater.  How about if he saw him and Jungkook together?  What would happen? He basically brushed off Jimin for Jungkook and lied about it.  Taehyung followed Jungkook uncertainly towards the theater, hoping Jimin wouldn’t come today. 

            But of course God had other plans for him because he immediately spotted Jimin’s electric blue Rolls Royce in the parking lot. 

            “Shit,” Taehyung whispered.  He quickly glanced around but couldn’t spot said boy anywhere. 

            “We should probably hurry since the movie is starting soon,” Jungkook started jogging towards the entrance.  Taehyung followed, his eyes darting everywhere trying to spot Jimin. 

           He didn’t spot his friend until they entered the theater, tickets in hand.  Jimin was waiting in line at the concession stand…alone.  Now Taehyung felt horribly guilty and nervous. Nervous because he didn’t want Jimin to find out he ditched him for Jungkook but guilty because he was the reason Jimin was going to this movie alone.  He just hoped Jungkook didn’t spot Jimin and say anything.  That would be awkward. 

            Taehyung was about to push Jungkook towards the theater when someone caught his eye.  Someone suddenly appeared beside Jimin.  The person playfully shoved Jimin who only smiled and shoved back.

            WHAT. THE. FUCK.  Since when was Jimin this friendly with strangers?  Was Jimin stupid?  He was about to go over there and tell that stranger off but stopped when Jimin put an arm around the guy and the guy turned.  It was one of Jimin’s dancer friends from dance club, the Jr guy who didn’t go by his real name.  The boy had a shock of black hair and one of the ugliest smiles that Taehyung had ever seen.  Why was Jimin even hanging out with him? 

            Jimin suddenly disappeared from his view and Taehyung jumped slightly.  Jungkook was currently leading him towards the theater.

            “I don’t want to miss the trailers, hyung,” Jungkook pulled at Taehyung’s sleeve.   

           

            Taehyung honestly wanted to pay attention to the movie because no lie he’d been waiting for months for this movie to be released but his eyes kept straying to the two people who were a couple of rows in front of him.  He saw that Jr guy keep leaning over and whispering to Jimin and Jimin do the same thing back to him.  It’s not like Jimin was acting any differently compared to when he went to the movies with Taehyung but that’s what bugged him.  He was supposed to be special.  Jimin’s not supposed to have more than one special friend! They were probably making comments about the movie and it pissed Taehyung off because 1) he wasn’t even paying attention to the movie and didn’t know what was going on and 2) Jimin just asked him today about watching Deadpool.  How had he found a replacement so soon?   

            As soon as the credits rolled, Taehyung sprinted out of the theater not even bothering to wait for Jungkook who shouted about watching the credits.  He waited outside the theater, pacing angrily.  What was taking Jungkook so long?  The credits weren’t that interesting.     

            Three minutes passed before Jungkook came out looking confused, “Why’d you leave so quickly?  Did you not like the movie?”

            Taehyung didn’t answer.  After an awkard silence, Jungkook stuck his hands in his pockets, “Guess we should probably go catch the train?”

            Taehyung nodded as he looked up at Jungkook, but his attention strayed to a person leaving the theater. His eyes caught Jimin’s.  The other's eyes widened in surprise. 

            Jungkook turned to see what Taehyung was staring at and smiled, “Hyung!  So you did come?”

            Jimin turned to face Jungkook and his eyes widened even more if that was possible.  He walked over to them with Jr. 

            “It was good right?  It was so funny,” Jr. commented. 

            “Yeah.  And that fight scene at the end,” Jungkook began enthusiastically talking with Jr. 

            Taehyung cleared his throat awkwardly; Jimin was staring at him.  For once his friend looked lost for words.  He kept on glancing at Jungkook and him. 

            “Hey, I’m going to take the train home so you don’t have to go out of your way,” Jr, put an arm around Jimin, “I’ll see you tomorrow at school?” 

            “Hyung are you taking the train too?” Jungkook looked over at Taehyung and Jimin. 

            “I can drive Taehyung home; you go ahead Kookie-yah.”

            Jungkook waved as he and Jr. started walking towards the subway station. 

 

            “Jimin, I’m sorry.  I should’ve told you.  I,” Taehyung began but Jimin put up a hand to stop him.

            “Don’t apologize. I get it.  I’m just curious why you didn’t tell me,” Jimin put his hands in his pocket as he walked beside Taehyung, “I mean I know you’re not good at explaining things to me,” Jimin’s voice was bitter, “Or telling me the truth like ever but you shouldn’t feel like you have to hide things from me.”

            “I wasn’t trying to,” Taehyung began.

            “Did you think I would be angry?”

            “That’s not it.”

            “Upset?”

            “No.”  

            “Jealous?”

            Taehyung hesitated as he thought it over.  Would Jimin be jealous?  I mean he had to be a bit jealous, right?

            “Tae,” Jimin interrupted him, “I’m okay with you hanging out with Jungkook.  I said I don’t like you anymore.  So you don’t have to feel guilty for choosing him over me,” Jimin put a hand up to ruffle his hair. 

            Taehyung was at a loss for words, “I didn’t choose him over you,” Taehyung interrupted, “He just asked me first.”      

            “The point is: you should’ve told me.”

            “Are you mad?” Taehyung gave Jimin a sheepish smile.

            “Why would I be mad?” Jimin opened the passenger side door for Taehyung, “I already told you I don’t like you.  It’s just weird that you felt like you had to hide something from me.”   

            Taehyung got in and turned to face the driver’s side so he could see when Jimin got in, “You’re really over me?”

            “I said I was didn’t I?”

            Taehyung could feel his temper rising, “So you’re saying you liked me since we were young and you’re over me like that?  Like what was I to you?  Just a small crush?  How can you get over me so quickly?  That’s not normal!”

            Jimin turned to him.  Instead of a shocked look, he smirked, “Are you angry about that?”

            “A little!  You replaced me with that guy so fast!  What is this?” Taehyung turned around and sat back in his chair, “It’s like I was nothing to you!”

            Taehyung knew he had no right to say all these things when he was the one who hurt Jimin and there were those months when Jimin needed time, but really.  Really now?  The feelings he pushed to the back of his mind came forward at full force.  It was perfect timing, Taehyung thought bitterly. The minute he realized he liked Jimin, it was too late.  Jimin moved on.  And now Taehyung was the one who was heartbroken.  Karma was a bitch. 

            “It’s like I’m not even worth liking,” Taehyung snapped. 

            Jimin didn’t flinch or move as he drove towards Taehyung’s house and it made Taehyung feel worse because he didn’t deny it either. 

            “Fine then,” Taehyung crossed his arms and fell back into his seat; he felt bitter and angry.  Jimin didn’t turn on the radio so the ride was silent and awkward.  Taehyung  almost regretted saying those things because now it seemed impossible for their friendship to go back to whatever the hell it was. 

            “Tae, you’re acting suspiciously like a jealous ex-boyfriend right now,” Jimin didn’t turn to stare at him but his words were like a question instead of a statement. 

            Taehyung was acting like a jealous ex-boyfriend.  He didn’t want to feel jealous; he wanted to ignore his feelings but it was so much easier said than done. 

            “Who knows? Maybe I should just start ignoring you for two months or something,” Taehyung’s voice was cold.  It was a possibility at this point.  Taehyung basically screwed himself when he developed feelings for Jimin. Why was their relationship so needlessly complicated? 

           “Don’t do that, Tae,” Jimin slowed down and parked the car in front of Taehyung’s house and yeah this was awkward.  They both stayed in the car for a while.  Jimin looked like he was thinking over something.  Taehyung on the other hand was debating on what to say next.  Should he say bye, apologize again or storm off?  He settled with being polite because even though he was angry, hurt and disappointed, Jimin was still very important to him.  And it was not polite to be rude to his “best friend.”  Because who knows how many more moments like these they would have.  He was trying to imagine two months without Jimin.  Was that enough time to get over someone?   

            “I’ll see you tomorrow at school,” Taehyung said shortly.   He looked over but Jimin was opening his door.  Taehyung unbuckled his seat belt and slid out of his seat.  Jimin hadn’t walked him to his door since…God knows how long. 

            By the time he closed his door, Jimin was standing awkwardly by his side with a hand rubbing the back of his neck. 

            Taehyung began walking but paused mid-step when Jimin grabbed his hand. Taehyung’s mind went blank for a second as he looked at their hands. 

            Earlier, Jimin said that he was over him and didn’t like him anymore and now he was holding his hand. Taehyung tried to think about what this could mean but his brain was still on vacation visiting Pluto so he couldn’t really think.  All he knew was that Jimin’s hand was warm and nice.  They really did fit perfectly with his.  He didn’t know he could miss hands but that’s what he was realizing in his clouded state. 

            They reached his door and Taehyung awkwardly tried to take out his keys with his hand still being held by Jimin’s.  He finally managed to succeed in jiggling the door open with one hand after what felt like an awkward eternity.   He turned to Jimin and thought of what to say next.  Should he repeat what he said as he got out of the car?  But wouldn’t that be stupid?  Should he address the handholding?  No it would ruin the illusion.  Whatever illusion had been created, Taehyung wasn’t sure. He would dwell on it when he was safely in his bedroom.

            “I’ll see you tomorrow at school,” Taehyung repeated.  Fuck it.  He didn’t know what else to say.  He was surprised he could even manage those words when he was only thinking about Jimin’s hand and how it still was holding his. 

            Jimin tugged at his hand softly as Taehyung tried to go inside his house. 

            “I don’t want to fuck this up,” Jimin began, “But I think things are changing between us.”

            Taehyung gulped, “It is?”

           “So I’m only going to say this once: I lied.”

            He let Taehyung’s hand go and looked down at the ground, “I bought those Deadpool tickets a couple weeks ago when you said you wanted to go,” he took a deep breath, “I did that because I’m not over you.  You were right.  You’re not an easy person to get over.”

            Taehyung could feel his heart beating in his chest and hear it in his ears.  He tried to swallow but couldn’t. 

            “I don’t know when I’ll stop liking you.  Maybe I won’t.  I get that you say you like Jungkook,” Jimin looked at him, “And I won’t get in the way of that; I promise.  But I still like you.”

            Taehyung’s mouth dropped open.  He wanted to say something, anything.  But no words came out.  His heart was beating so fast it was definitely going to explode in his chest.  He half wondered if that coffee did some serious injury to his body. His hand moved towards his phone, ready to call 911 because surely there’s no way he was going to live much longer when his heart was acting like this. 

            Jimin put his hand on Taehyung’s cheek and Taehyung involuntarily shivered.

            “I’m going to kiss you now,” Jimin moved forward and before Taehyung could process the words, Jimin’s lips were on his. 

            Taehyung froze.  He didn’t know what to do.  Jimin was kissing him.  And it felt nice.  Of course he was in too much shock to kiss back; Jimin’s hand moved to the back of his neck and pushed him forward slightly. 

            Taehyung closed his eyes and returned the kiss.  His mouth was moving by itself, knowing exactly what to do.  His hands wound themselves around Jimin’s waist moving him closer.

            He felt Jimin deepen the kiss and Taehyung moved back slightly until his back hit the door.  He held tighter onto Jimin, wanting more.  By the time they broke away they were both breathing heavily. 

            “I’ll see you tomorrow at school,” Jimin said.  He turned around and walked back to his car, leaving Taehyung in a confused mess at his doorstep.  He liked Jimin and Jimin still liked him.   

 

            Taehyung didn’t know what to expect the next day at school but Jimin acting like nothing happened wasn’t one of them.  Jimin met him at his locker with complaints about how he had an exam that day.  He walked him to class (didn’t even attempt to hold his hand).  He was just normal Jimin. 

            The one thing that pissed Taehyung off was that Jimin decided to sit with Jr. at lunch. 

            Taehyung almost believed that yesterday didn’t happen but then he would catch Jimin glancing at his lips.  He could still taste Jimin’s lips in his memory and to be honest those lips and that boy was going to be the death of him because it’s all he’s been thinking of since yesterday. 

            Taehyung was distracted from his memory by the hand being waved in front of him.

            “You look distracted,” Jimin smirked at him.

            “You’re no help at that,” Taehyung said bitterly. 

            Jimin’s smirk turned into a soft smile, “Are you thinking about that kiss?”

            Taehyung turned red as he remembered their passionate kiss.  Jimin must’ve misunderstood because a sad smile appeared on his face, “I understand.  Look we can forget what happened yesterday.  I said I won’t get in the way anymore.  I meant it,” Jimin patted him on the back encouragingly and got up from the table, “I’ll catch you later?” 

            “Wait no,” Taehyung turned around but Jimin was already making his way across the room.   

 

            It was fitting to go back to the beginning.  Earlier this morning he slipped a red note into Jimin’s locker without hesitation.   This time Taehyung didn’t anxiously debate with himself if he should give the confession letter or not.  Unlike the usual purple post it notes, the letter was red and in an envelope with Jimin’s name printed neatly on the front. 

            It looked fancy but it was stupidly simple. 

            I like you followed by his number.  Maybe he should’ve been more eloquent but Taehyung wasn’t eloquent and most of the time he was an idiot so this was fitting for him. 

            Taehyung tried to control his beating heart as he neared his locker.  This was going to be the moment that would determine everything.  He felt his heart drop and disappear into a dark abyss; Jimin wasn’t there.  Taehyung tried to swallow his disappointment as he headed to lunch.  Yet again, Jimin was eating with Jr. and the dance crew.  Jimin didn't even glance in Taehyung’s direction. Taehyung felt like crying because he put himself out there and Jimin rejected him. 

            Maybe this was some sort of revenge for playing Jimin in the first place. 

            It was obvious by the end of the day that Jimin was ignoring him.  Maybe he thought Taehyung’s note was a cruel joke.  But Jimin knew what type of person Taehyung was.  He should know Taehyung was being honest.  He hurriedly got his backpack and walked quickly away from school.    

            What was going on with him and Jimin?  Couldn’t Jimin be a man and just confront him?  Were those tears in his eyes?  Taehyung wiped at his eyes with his sleeve.  Who knew heartbreak could hurt so much?  

            “Hey.”

            Taehyung stopped as he heard the voice in front of him.  He looked around.  Somehow he’d reached the front gates.

            “This time you’re late,” Jimin tilted his head to the side, a teasing tone in his voice, “But at least you got the locker right this time around”.   Jimin’s hand reached out to wipe at Taehyung’s eyes, “Don’t tell me you’re crying, you big wuss.”

            “I hate you,” Taehyung exclaimed.

            “I thought you liked me,” Jimin held out his note, “It’s not much but it gets straight to the point.  I like that.”

            Taehyung sighed, “You know I’m not good with words.”

            “Trust me; I know,” Jimin laughed.

            “Why did you ignore me you jerk?” Taehyung tried to glare at Jimin but he failed because he couldn’t stop the stupid smile that appeared.

            “I wasn’t sure if you were serious or not,” Jimin said seriously, “But then I realized you wouldn’t do this to me again.”     

            “Do you think I’m heartless?” Taehyung’s eyes widened.

            “Do you really want me to answer that?" Jimin raised an eyebrow.  He put a hand to the back of Taehyung’s head, grabbing at the small tufts of hair on Taehyung’s neck.

            “I like you Park Jimin,” Taehyung smiled, “I know I was a jerk before but I won’t hurt you again.  This time it’s for real,” Taehyung smiled sheepishly, “Because on a scale of 1 to 10 you’re a nine and I hope I’m the 1 you need.”

            Jimin paused, “Wow.  I’m walking away right now,” Jimin backed up but Taehyung grabbed onto the bottom of his shirt.   

            “But I’ve got a really good one,” he took a breath, “Jimin, you stole my heart.  If I knew I was going to die tomorrow I would spend every second today thinking about you,” Taehyung smiled, “But I’d rather spend it kissing you and I really mean that.  I---”

            “Just shut up,” Jimin laughed, “You’re terrible.  Just come here,” Jimin grabbed Taehyung by the front of his coat and brought him into a kiss. 

            “Don’t ever use one of those pick-up lines again or I’m breaking up with you.”

            “But you see this shirt? It’s so boyfriend material!”

            “Okay, we’re definitely breaking up right now.”