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I'm not gay (But I am possibly in love with you)

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Dean Winchester, senior in Lawrence High School, best player on the baseball team and the best in Bobby Singer’s Auto Shop class.
Also the hottest man ever in Kansas, if you believe in high school rumours. If you don’t, then think twice.
Because this 18 year-old barely a man had light brown hair – so light it turned to blond in Summer – according to the Dean Winchester Fan Club. Eyes bright green and freckles in the form of every star constellations. He had the body of a Greek god – said on a few occasions Lisa Braden, cheerleader.
But the weird thing is that even though he was the most perfect man, he had never had a girlfriend, nor a boyfriend, for the record. He flirted with almost everyone shamelessly, even with Becky, the young school secretary. But Dean spent his little free time with his quite nerd friends. Charlie Bradbury and her girlfriend, Gilda, Jo Harvelle, mouthy surrogate sister and Castiel Novak.

Castiel, or as his friends called him, Cas was a few months older than Dean, had dark hair that looked black in certain lights and had the most beautiful blue eyes Dean has ever seen. They’d been best friends since the Winchesters moved to town when John Winchester got promoted. So in the time of speaking it had been over 10 years.

Their high school was suspiciously open-minded. When Castiel came out in their second year, no one batted an eye.
Except for Rufus, who was on the baseball team and after calling Cas a “fag” he accidentally got hit by a ball on practice.
After a broken nose and some strong words from Dean he didn’t dare to say anything else. The Winchester boy was highly protective of his best friend.

‘Geez, Dean, you’re an idiot!’ said Cas while trying to keep a straight face when Dean got suspended for that move.
Two years had passed and even though both guys dated a few people, they were single – and prom was quickly approaching. Dean had someone on mind but he was sure he would get rejected and he was also sure he wouldn’t survive that.
Nor would his friendship with Cas. Because you see he was in love with his best friend. He had those feelings since the age of 12. But it was not a surprise. Cas was intelligent, funny with a dark sense of humour, sassy and gorgeous. Dean was certain he’d never seen such a beauty.

‘Dean, what do you think? Dean?’ He heard the gravelly voice of his friend. He zoned out again, now watching the stubble on Cas’ strong jaw, thinking about how it would feel against his lips.
‘Sorry, what?’ He didn’t even realise he was staring.
‘I asked if you wanted to go to the movies instead of the prom. Are you okay? You look flushed.’ Cas leaned closer and Dean couldn’t help but watch how those thick lips moved.
Charlie snickered, that’s what made the brunette snap out of his staring.
‘Yeah, sure. Not like there’s anyone I’d invite.’ He shrugged, not missing the small hurt look on Cas’ face.
‘Okay then. But tonight is Flash, don’t forget about it! I’m off, Gabriel wants to talk.’ With a quick wave he left the table.

Dean looked after him longingly.
‘Oh, Merlin, you’ve got it bad.’ commented Charlie as Dean went back to eating his not-so-bad cafeteria mac ’n’ cheese.
‘I… Charlie, what should I do?’ Buried the teen his face in his hands.
‘Well, peasant. You could ask him to prom. I’ve got a feeling he wouldn’t say no. But prom is on Friday so you really should say something before someone else has him as the last resort.’ Surprisingly Charlie sounded sincere and serious, seeing how miserable her friend was.
‘But what if he says no? I won’t survive that…’ Dean was comfortable with admitting his feelings to the girls if not to the dark haired friend of his.
‘Dean, today he’ll be at yours, right?’ He nodded so Charlie continued. ‘And your parents are on their nth honeymoon?’ Nod again. ‘This is the perfect opportunity! Today is Tuesday, so you have t minus two months. Don’t be a chicken this time, Dean. Ask him out. Even if he says no you will have two days to cry.’
‘This is not funny, Charlie! I will never be able to look into his eyes if he says no.’ Dean knew he was whining but these were desperate times.

Luckily the bell saved him from future humiliation. Auto shop class. Here, he could be alone. True, his big bear friend, Benny was present but he knew when to shut up and he let Dean work in silence.
By the time the sandy haired teen was done with the Chevelle he was working on, it was way past 4 pm. He quickly gathered his stuff and ran to his black Impala. Officially it was his dad’s car but he was cool with letting the teen drive it.
He knew he was late but surprisingly Sam wasn’t waiting by the car as usual. There was a little piece of paper under the windshield wiper.
‘Guessed you’d work on the Chevy so I left with Jess. Don’t wait for me, I’ll be at hers. – Sam’.
That meant he’d have to be totally alone with Cas. In an empty house. It wasn’t anything new but with prom around the corner and Dean finally admitting he was kinda, a little bit head over heels for Castiel, he was afraid he might fuck it up. ‘Geez, get a grip. It’s just good ol’ Cas. No biggie.’
After a little pep talk to himself, he drove home, with Back off Bitch blaring from the old player.

After arriving home Dean took a quick shower, trying to wash the oil out of his nails with not much success. Putting on his faded Metallica tee and a holey pair of jeans he went to check on the kitchen. 20$ was waiting for him on the fridge. He grinned and when he got a text from Cas, saying he’d be there in 30, Dean ordered two pizzas. One meat lover and one Hawaiian because Castiel was a weirdo who liked warm, cheesy pineapple.
The pizzas arrived a few minutes before Cas so Dean had some time to plan. He was slowly panicking.
‘I can see you pacing. Stop. It will be fine.’ Read the text from Charlie. Dean smiled at how much Charlie knew him.
The ring was loud in the otherwise silent house and Dean actually jumped up of the couch.
‘Hey, dude! No one is here today so we can grab a beer!’ Said the younger teen as a greeting.
‘Great! Wait, where’s your brother? Wasn’t he supposed to be here tonight?’ Cas had a beautiful smile.
‘He’s at Jess’. Come in. Flash starts in 15, your disgusting thing you call a pizza is still hot and beer is cold.’ Dean made a beeline to the kitchen, grabbing two bottles from the fridge, and taking the two boxes to the living room.
Cas was already sitting on the huge plush couch in Indian style, just like always. They were silent while watching Barry’s failure at winning against Zoom. But the episode was over way too quickly and even though they talked about their theories while eating and drinking they were soon over of their original plan and had nothing to do.

‘Cas, man… I… I want to ask something.’ Dean was trying to sound nonchalant but as he turned to look at his friend he saw that the raven haired boy put his bottle on the table and turned to face him.
‘Yes? You okay? Is everything okay? You seemed off all day.’ ‘Shit, shit, shit.’
‘What? Yeah, I’m okay. It’s about prom. I lied earlier. I do have someone in mind but I didn’t want to talk about in school.’ Dean was talking quicker than usual but Cas just thought he was nervous. Of course he was, since he had someone to ask out. It was probably Lisa. She was beautiful and clever. Or Bela, the exchange student. She was snarky and she flirted a lot with Dean.
‘Who is it? And what do you want to ask?’ Yeah, go for interested but not hurt, Castiel. He’s not supposed to know that your heart is breaking.
‘It doesn’t matter. I just want to practice, I guess?’ Dean was rubbing at his nape, just like he always did when he was agitated.
‘Practice how?’ Cas had his suspicions but he was silently praying for it not being true.
‘I could pretend you were the person I want to ask then you could tell me if it was okay or not?’ Dean sounded so hopeful, Cas didn’t have it in him to turn him down.
‘Okay, go on. Do I have to act differently or am I okay like this?’ The younger boy just shook his head, grabbed his hand and suddenly it was impossible for Castiel to look away from those big green eyes.

‘Cas? I know it sounds weird and that we’ve been friends for over ten years but… Would you be my date for the prom?’ Cas’ heart broke. The question sounded so real and the way those big hands covered his thin palm was devastating.
But Dean was still looking at him, like it was true. Like he really wanted Castiel to go with him. What if he somehow spotted his longing? What if he saw that Castiel was jealous of all of his exes? There were too many questions and Cas didn’t like to be joked on.
‘Are you mocking me? Why are you doing this, Dean? This is not funny at all…’ He tried to pull his hand back but Dean held it securely.
‘I’m not playing. Cas… Castiel. I want you to come with me to the prom. There is no one else. Never been. I’ve been in love with you since I can remember. I know I never said anything but I was afraid. I’m still afraid but if you don’t want to do anything with me, it’s okay. We don’t have to meet and I will try to be out of your hair and even sit elsewhere. Even next to Meg just not to bother yo…mhhhpp.’

Cas couldn’t really wrap his head around the things Dean said but the most important thing, namely that Dean LOVED him got through the fog in his mind. So he did the only thing he could think about and kissed the babbling boy.
Dean was too shocked to react first, so the older teen pulled away with a quick apologise on his lips but the sandy haired boy dove back in, overcoming his shock. The kiss was still innocent, just closed mouths moving on each other. Cas would have loved to deepen the kiss but he knew that once he started he wouldn't stop.
'I will gladly go with you to the prom. But I want you in suit. With vest and tie. No excuses.' Stated Castiel when they pulled away to breath.
'Okay. I'm in.' Dean was oddly shy about this whole thing. There was no trace of his usual easiness.
'You okay? You are silent.' The older boy had an idea why Dean was so different but he was a jerk and loved to tease his friend.
'Yeah, I'm okay. What do you want to do now?'
'We could watch the new Arrow too? If it's okay with you.'
'Or we can even watch the new Sherlock Special.' Dean wanted to make his new boyfriend as happy as he could. And if that meant watching sexy British men then be it.
'No, it's okay. It's quite late so we can go to sleep now. I'm going to sleep in Sam's room.' Cas said with a soft smile on his face.
'Why would you sleep there? You never sleep in that room. We can still make the camp bed.' Dean stood up and scratched his back, moaning as his joints popped. Cas blushed but stood up as well.
'Okay, uhm... Can I start in the shower? I will be quick.' Dean just nodded and went to his room to set up Cas' bed and think.
He couldn't really wrap his head around the fact that Cas felt the same. Or something similar. He couldn't see but he wore a stupid dopey smile.

'Bathroom is free, so you can go.' Said Cas but his voice got lower when he saw his friend was only wearing white boxer briefs. Dean knew he looked good but the look his new boyfriend gave him was something else. He wasn't a blushing virgin, but next to Castiel, he was reduced to one.
'Yeah, okay. Be right back.' He smiled at the other teen and practically ran to the bathroom. Dean was thinking about jerking off under the shower but he thought better of it - his friend was in the next room.
Arriving back he met with a surprising sight. Cas was in his bed, reading a random book he must have found on the side table.
'Uhm. What are you doing?' Cas didn't say anything just patted the bed next to him.
'Okay. You sure?' Castiel nodded and smiled at Dean. The blushing teen, now only wearing Starfleet Academy boxers and a faded Black Sabbath tee climbed under the blanket.
'Hello, Dean.'
'Hi. So we are sleeping together now?'
'Yeah, but we're just sleeping. We are totally not ready for more. Or I don't know. We might be. But it's our first night being a...' Cas voice got lower and didn't finish his sentence.
'Couple? As boyfriends?' This was Dean's area.
'Yep. So give me a kiss and cuddle me.' Said Cas teasingly, sliding closer to the brunette.
'I can do that.' Was the last thing either Dean or Cas said for a few minutes. Their kisses were unhurried and sweet, only a little bit of tongue here and there, with hands roaming on each other.
They pulled away almost at the same time with soft smiles on their features.
'Goodnight, Cas. I love you.'
'Sleep well. I love you, too.'