Chapter 1: Prelude
Rachel opened her front door with the intent of going for an afternoon stroll in the park. She liked to do that on Sunday. Sunday was the one day of her week that she had a full free day from her busy activities. Only because everyone who she hired to help prepare her for her future demanded one day of rest. It was until her daddy explained that it took God six days to create the Earth and Heavens – and that he took the seventh as a day of rest. Who was she to demand that everyone worked for seven straight days. She tried to argue as best as her six year old mind could do – but she finally saw her daddy's point, and allowed the others to have their day of rest. It took six years for Rachel herself to take her day of rest.
Rachel was a very stubborn girl.
But, Rachel actually enjoyed a full day of not preparing herself for her future. She was actually happy to rest one day of the week. Even though she spent those days all by herself – or with her fathers. But, Sophomore year changed that. Glee changed that. Now that she actually had people whom wanted to be around her – Noah truly was the only one who didn't mind her being around him – even when she talked too much. The others were coming around. Even through they mostly denial it. They are coming around.
Finn no longer tried to hide the fact that he had true feelings for her. He was no longer ashamed to be openly dating her. Her relationship with Quinn was becoming stronger in the positive side instead of the negative. Rachel was happy with this development – she just had to watch herself closely not to cause Quinn to withdraw her very tentative and fragile friendship. Rachel had waited her entire life to be friends with Quinn Fabray – and she would be damn that she would destroy it.
Brittany was another story. A whole other story. Brittany willing and freely offered up her friendship the moment that she joined Glee. Rachel smiled as she thought of Brittany running up to her and giving her a tight hug after the group accepted her, Quinn and Santana in. Brittany had happily said that now that they belonged to the same group – they could be friends. Rachel accepted Brittany's friendship right in that moment – even through the tall Dutch blond had willing tormented her alongside Quinn and Santana. Rachel always knew deep down that those actions truly hurt Brittany's soul. That was why Rachel forgive Brittany even before the first unkind word that came out of her mouth.
Santana would never ever admit to being friends with Rachel. Santana would never ever admit to having caring feelings for Rachel. Santana would never allow weakness in her attitude towards Rachel. Rachel never expected her too. But. Rachel knew that Santana was now firmly in her corner. That Santana would be one of the first to protect her if she was being tormented once more.
Kurt and Mercedes still loved to be the ones whom argue with her during Glee practices, just during the times when she tried to take over ever aspect of the group. Which wasn't as much as the previous year. She had calmed down enough to realize that although out of all of them – she was the one whom dream t about making it big on Broadway – but the rest of the group needed Glee to have a outlet for their love for music. She was willing enough to take the back seat and allow the others to shine,. Only for the songs that she knew would best suit the voice. Otherwise her ego couldn't allow a song to be destroyed for the sake of having a 'modern' number for competition. But, Kurt and Mercedes wanted to hang out without outside of the club.
Tina, Artie, Matt, and Mike had never given her any troubles. She knew the four would never give her trouble. So her relationships with them had been the same. Just now they were friends instead of fellow students.
Rachel opened her front door on the intent of going for an afternoon stroll in the park. Her breath caught in her throat as her right hand rose to her chest. Her eyes widen in shock.
"Hello Rachel." Brittany said with a smile.
"B-brittany? I mean, hello Brittany." Rachel said as her breathing came back to normal. "What can I do for you?" She wasn't aware that Brittany even knew where she lived. Also it was very odd to see Brittany alone without Santana glued too her side. In school or otherwise.
"Love me." Brittany simply said.
Rachel blinked. She didn't mean it the way it sounded. This is Brittany for crying out loud. "Brittany I do love you. I love you as my friend. My true friend." She said pulling the door shut behind her.
"I don't want you to love me like that, Rachel. I want you to love me the way a woman loves a woman." Brittany wrapped her arms around her waist.
"I'm not against being with another girl, Brit. But, I'm with Finn. My romantically feelings belong to him – and only too him." Rachel sighed.
"But you love Quinn." Brittany frowned in confusion. "You don't love Quinn as a friend. You love Quinn as a woman loves a woman."
Rachel blinked. "I don't love Quinn, Brittany." She said as she felt the blush rise in her cheeks. "I like Quinn, I like her very much. But I don't have any loving feelings towards her." How can I? When that would make Quinn run away from me for good. "Look Brittany, I only love one person that way. That person is Finn Hudson."
"He doesn't deserve it." Brittany said in a knowing voice. "Quinn may deserve it. But she doesn't want it. I deserve it. I want it. Love me Rachel." She pleaded.
"You have Santana, Brittany." Rachel sighed.
"Sex isn't love." Brittany repeated in a monotonous tone. She reached over and lightly traced Rachel's right cheek bone. "I don't want to have sex with you, Rach. I want to love you."
Rachel sighed as she closed her eyes. She just allowed herself to enjoy the feeling of Brittany's fingers on her face. It would be very easy to be with Brittany. She fully knew that unlike Finn, Brittany would jump to her defensive whenever someone insulted her. But, she didn't feel anything romantic towards the taller blonde. Rachel opened her eyes and stared into Brittany's eyes. "I can't lie to you, Brittany. I don't love you that like. I will never love you like that. You need to accept my friendship." She moved to the right away from Brittany's hand.
"I would never hurt you." Brittany said backing away. "I would never willing make you cry." She turned and rushed away.
Rachel leaned against the post that led down the front porch. She simply watched as the tall blond ran down the sidewalk – until Brittany was lost to her sight. She knew that she had hurt the girl. But she spoke the truth. "She has Santana. She'll be fine." She murmured as she walked down the steps.
Rachel was going for an afternoon stroll in the park.
End of Prelude:
Chapter 2: Putting Up The Walls
In the park:
Walking down a familiar, and favorite trail, Rachel thought back to earlier at her home. She felt horrible for hurting Brittany the way she did. She really didn't understand why Brittany was behaving the way she was. She couldn't believe that the tall blond was actually in love with her. "She has Santana. She'll be fine. This thing that she feels for me will soon pass." Sighing she started to pick up her pace.
"Perhaps Santana put her up too this. Or even Quinn. It has too be their new way to get under my skin. What perfect way to hurt me but to get my guard down …." Frowning she felt her heart break even more then ever before. Not the thought that Santana was out to hurt her. What else was she too expect from Santana Lopez.
But if Quinn was behind this – then all bets were off. If Quinn was using Brittany to get her to let her guard completely down – then Rachel would never forgive the head bitch in charge. She didn't even realize that she had been running until she literally bumped into something solid. It caused her too fly forward and land against something firm and strong.
She felt arms wrap around her lower back and she felt herself lower even closer to the warmth that she found herself in. She just allowed her breathing to get back under control. "Better now?" She heard whisper in her right ear. Humming her consent. Her eyes slowly flickered opened met opened concerned hazel eyes. Gasping she tried to move away – but Quinn's arms just tightened her hold.
"Hey, hey." Quinn said as she brought a hand off of shorter Diva's hip bone and up to her jaw. "Relax. Don't fight it. Just relax."
"Let me go." Rachel breathed in quickly. "Let me go." She tried to fight Quinn's hold on her – but the head cheerleader was much stronger than she was.
Quinn held on for dear life as Rachel tried to struggle away from her. But the shorter Diva soon tired out and laid motionless breathing heavily against her. She moved her hand back up to the brunette's face and gently stroked it.
Rachel's head rested against Quinn's chest. Just where the soft beating of her heart was. "I fear that I may lose you for good this time."
Quinn frowned, "Why would you lose me, Rach?"
"If you did this thing that I fear that you did. Then I can't find myself ever forgiving you." Rachel said as tears rolled down her cheeks.
Quinn was nonplussed. What the hell was Rachel talking about? She hadn't had one unkind thought towards Rachel in months. She fought down her raw anger and tuned into how truly fragile and broken Rachel was. "You need to talk to me, Rach, you need to tell me what is going on. How can I he .." sighed, "clear my name if you don't tell me."
"I'm afraid to speak of it." Rachel whispered. "If I'm right then this is the last moment we will ever spend together. If I'm wrong then this is the last moment we will ever spend together."
Quinn frowned in confusion. "Why wouldn't we spend time together if you are wrong?" She didn't understand Rachel at all. She hated that she didn't understand the short Diva – she wanted to demand answers. But she knew that if she did then she would have lost Rachel for good. "I don't understand. Please tell me what is troubling you so."
Rachel took a shuddering breath, "Are you setting Brittany up to be my final down fall?"
"What? No!" Quinn replied.
"I pray that you are telling the truth." Rachel said her head burying deeper into the blond's chest.
Quinn lowered her head, "I would never want to cause your downfall, Rachel Berry. I never want you to ever have an downfall. I may have never showed it before … until recently that is …. but I'm your number one fan."
"My fathers are my number one fans, they are my only ones." Rachel murmured in the blond's chest. She breathed in and out.
Quinn listened as Rachel's breathing settled into an even rhyme. "Sleep, just sleep." She gently brushed away the bangs that covered the brunette's forehead. Placing her lips against the forehead, "I won't let any harm come to you."
"You need to tell Rachel that you took Finn's virginity." Brittany slammed her right hand on the dresser. "Rachel has a right to know that she's in love with a liar."
Santana sneered, "I don't have to tell RuPaul anything."
Brittany stormed over, and pushed Santana back against the wall, "Don't ever call her that ever again."
"What is man hands to you! She's a fucking loser, Brit. A loser. It's one fucking thing for Quinn to go soft. After all Quinn had pretty much destroyed her life when she went off and fucked Puck, and gotten pregnant at sixteen. Quinn's life is in the dumpster now." Santana growled low in her throat. "I'm not going to allow you to join Quinn in the sewer for that fucking loser."
"Why are you so afraid Santana?" Brittany looked into her best friend's eyes. "Why are you so damn afraid."
Santana smiled thinly, "I'm not afraid, B." She moved closer to the taller blond – her arm lightly running up Brittany's forearm. "Why is it important to you?"
"It's just is, S. Rachel is important to me." Brittany sighed. "Just tell her about Finn."
"I'm not going to do any favors for Berry. She's not worth any dedication from me." Santana sneered.
Brittany stepped back. "Then help me convince Finn to finally tell the truth."
"No." Santana stormed. "What is man hands to you, Brittany? What are you in love with the freak now." Her eyes widen as she read the truth in the tall blonde eyes. "Oh hell no!" She said in a low hard voice. "I have one blonde whom had fallen under the freaks spell – I'm not going to have you also." She rushed over and gripped Brittany's forearms tightly. "I can't save Quinn, Brittany, but I'm going to save you."
"Do you love me?" Brittany whispered.
"I don't love anyone, Brittany. You know that." Santana snorted.
"Do you love me?" Brittany demanded in a hard voice.
"Love is a stupid emotion, Brittany, only thing love has too offer is hurt." Shaking her head, "I won't let you get hurt by love, Brittany." She pulled the blond to her and slammed her mouth hard against the other girl's mouth. Slamming her tongue into the other girl's mouth.
Rachel moaned softly as she felt her body come awake. Fingers lightly traced a pattern down her cheek bone, and jaw line. "Just five more minutes, please, mommy." The fingers stilled on her jaw. She stiffened as she realized what she had said. She had upset one of her fathers by her thoughtfulness … But then where her head rested alerted her that it wasn't one of her fathers waking her up. She began to hyperventilate.
"You are safe, Rachel." A warm voice softly cooed in her ear.
Rachel closed her eyes as she calmed herself before she had a full on panic attack. She felt Quinn's fingers go back to softly running up and down her cheek bone. "I wish only that I was." She whispered as she felt a tear roll down her cheek.
"Tell me what has upset you this much, Rach. Tell me whom upset you this much." Quinn's voice remained gentle but with a hard edge to it. She was going to make whomever did this to her Rachel pay. Pay dearly.
"I'm used to the insults." Rachel began in a calm voice. "The attacks. I'm used too all the bad that life has for me. I'm prepared for it all now." She felt Quinn stiffen under her. "But this latest attack is too cruel."
"Who attacked you." Quinn said tugging up Rachel's chin so she could look into the brunette's eyes. Fire was enlighten in her hazel eyes.
Rachel swallowed. Hard. Over and over again. "No one." She lied.
Quinn's eyes slanted, "Don't lie to me Rachel."
"Sense when have you become my greatest protector?" Rachel demanded. "Just last year you were in your element torturing me. It wasn't till you got pregnant that you allowed yourself to soften. But even then you were never my friend. Why now?" She whispered the last.
"I just realized how important you are too me." Quinn truthfully said. "I always knew that God put you in my life very specifically … but I fought against it. I fought against HIM so hard. Until I messed up and gotten pregnant. Then as Beth was growing inside me I took a deep stock of what I allowed myself to become. I didn't like what I had chosen to become – so I decided to change."
"Not that I'm not happy that you are finally letting your softer side out, Quinn. But I feel that it may be too late for us." Rachel said never taking her eyes off of Quinn's hazel ones. "I just feel that too much hurt feelings have truly – for lack of a better phase – clogged up my pipes."
"Rachel-" Quinn started to say.
Rachel moved out of Quinn's arms. "Thank you for taking care of me during my passing out moment earlier." She gained her balance on her knees. "Thank you for not just leaving me." Standing to her feet.
"Rachel-" Quinn hissed as she sat up.
Her right hand shaking at her side, "I just can't do this with you, Quinn. I just can't." Rachel whispered as tears rolled down her cheeks. "I'm sorry." With that she turned, and ran as if her life depended on it.
"Rachel!" Quinn shouted after the retreating figure as she jumped to her feet. "Rachel!" She screamed at the speeding brunette. She started to run after the slightly younger girl – but she saw that for once Rachel Berry was going to out run her. She felt a stitch in her right side and she stopped. Leaning over the park bench that was to the right of her she tried to hold back the hot tears from rolling down her cheeks – as she watched as Rachel was lost from her sight. "Damn it!" She moaned softly to herself.
END CHAPTER ONE
Chapter 3: Pacts Are Made
Quinn stared in front of her not taking anything in at all. How could she – when her full thoughts were firmly centered on a very short and annoying brunette Diva. But as time had speed passed she found what she usually found annoying about Rachel as endearing. She found everything about Rachel Berry endearing. She couldn't believe that she had willed herself to torment the girl for so long. All she had too do was allowed her hearts desire and be friends with the then six year old.
But, she was a Fabray. Quinn had harden her heart against the smaller brunette in front of her. She made Russel Fabray proud that day. Quinn folded her arms across her chest and sneered at the hopeful face, "I would never be friends with a disease like you." With those words all the boys and girls that had surrounded them all laughed and shouted their own insults at the six year old brunette. Quinn had watched as Rachel turned and ran away. But her heart broke into millions of pieces at the sight of the raw pain in Rachel's eyes before she left.
It took Rachel two years to manage to hide the pain in her eyes. Quinn couldn't believe that an eight year old child managed to hide her pain as well as Rachel had. There had been a hand full of times that Quinn managed to break through Rachel's walls – until sixth grade that was. Once she hit sixth grade and fully decided to follow in her older sister's footsteps to be on the Cheerios – she slammed the steel around her heart, and soul firmly in place. She regretted it to this day. She would die regretting it.
She would die making it up to Rachel.
"Hey baby Mama." Puck said suddenly in front of her. He frowned in concern when she didn't bite at him for calling her that. "Quinn." She wasn't even forced on him. "Earth to Quinn. Come on baby Mama penny for your thoughts."
"He doesn't deserve her." Quinn hissed through her teeth.
"Who doesn't deserve her? Who's her?" Puck was confused.
"Finn." Quinn barked. "Finn doesn't deserve Rachel."
"I agree with that assessment." Puck nodded his head, as he put his right hand on the back of the bench. "But Rachel is so determined that Finn has too be the one for her. She's such a stubborn soul that it would take everything from Heaven and Hell to make even the slightest dent in her armor!" His hand lifted and slammed back on the wood.
"Finn fully knows this. He puts this air of a dumb dopey soul – but I know full well that Finn Hudson fully knows what he is doing to Rachel." Quinn spat out. "He has to be stopped before he crushes Rachel's soul to no end."
"We must protect Rachel." Puck growled through his teeth grounding.
"No matter what it takes." Quinn held out her hand.
Noah Puckerman stared deeply into Quinn's cold, and hard eyes. His hand rose and placed it in with the mother of his daughter. "I'm in. I'm in all the way." He firmly said.
Quinn gave Puck's hand one good firm shake before dropping it.
"What we just did, San, was for the very last time." Brittany said standing to her feet, and shoving her left foot deeper into her shoe.
Santana smirked. "You'll be back. Just like always B."
"No Santana, we are finished with the friends with benefits." Brittany sighed. "I would still like to be your best friend. But you can't attack Rachel ever again. One more slight to her and then I'm sorry but I can't be friends with you."
Santana stared into Brittany's eyes. "All right B. I promise that you won't hear me attack Berry ever again. I don't want to lose your friendship." Moving closer to the tall blond and wrapping her arms around the thin waist, "But we both know you will be back in my bed eventually. Once you get it through your head that Berry will never love you."
"Good bye Santana." Brittany turned and left the bedroom.
Santana's eyes slanted. "This isn't over man hands." She whispered. "I will destroy you once and for all. Once I'm finished with you – you'll wish you were never born." She fully knew that she had to be very careful with her plans to destroy one Rachel Berry. She knew Brittany meant what she said. She would block Santana out of her life and heart if Santana openly hurt Rachel.
But there were ways around that little problem. Santana made her plans and dotted all her i's. Rachel Berry wasn't the only one whom could make detailed plans. Or micro-manage her life. Santana calmly walked to her desk where her lap top was. She very calmly lifted the lid, and pressed the power button. Calmly she sat down in her chair, and waited for the single to type in her password to open up the desktop. Once she was actually in the desktop, she calmly tapped the button for Yahoo Messenger and waited for it to log her in.
Santana calmly moved the cursor up to the one name she needed to set her plans in motion.
TheREALHBIC: I have a plan to take man hands down for good. Are you interested?
PheonixRising: You always know that I'm up for anything to do with -gag- taking man hands down. Tell me what too do.
TheREALHBIC: I can't have it known that I am taking the midget down. Brittany would hate me forever if she found out.
PheonixRising: She'll never find out. You know that I'm so discreet that no one has ever found out that most of the crime against the ones whom are destroyed.
TheREALHBIC: Here is the plan...
Two hours later Santana Lopez calmly closed the lid of her lap top. An evil smile on her lips – and coldness in her eyes she stared at the still open door. "Don't worry Brittany, I'll soon have Man hands in a place where she can't weave her spell on you any longer."
"I just want to know why I'm not enough for you." Artie said with a tear in his eyes. "I know that you love to dance, and with this damn wheel chair I can't dance with you. But Tina, you always claimed that you didn't give a fuck about this fucking chair. What the hell changed?"
With tears rolling down her cheeks, Tina told the truth. "We are in high school, Artie, fucking high school. It's much too soon to settle down with that one person you want to spend the rest of your life with. I'm scared."
"You don't think that I'm not scared too." Artie's voice shook. "But all because we are feeling the feelings that we are feeling towards one another Tina, doesn't mean we have to break up. It just means that we just -"
"We just what Artie? Go with it? Enjoy the ride? Enjoy the bliss?" Tina stood to her feet and paced in a furious state. "No offense Artie Abram, but I'm much too young to be tied down to just one person. I'm seventeen years old for crying out loud. I want to experience all that life has for me. I want my damn freedom!"
Artie stared at his girlfriend – he couldn't quite believe that she was now his ex-girlfriend. "You haven't strutted since you started Tina."
Tina stopped dead in her tracks. "W-what?"
"You have strutted since you started to break my heart." Artie softly said. "Throughout our friendship and romance you had stuttered. But not with breaking my heart. Why is that?"
"W-what a-are y-you t-t-talking a-about Artie?" Tina waved her hands wide.
Artie stared into Tina's wide and freaked out eyes. "Nothing." He shook his head. His hands on the wheels of his chair. "I accept your break up with me, Tina. I hope we can remain friends. But, you need too give me some time to get over you." He wheeled past his ex-girlfriend and out of her house.
Tina just silently watched him go. Her breathing returning to normal as Artie dropped the issue of her stuttering.
Rachel walked up her driveway and stopped in her tracks. There was Finn sitting on the top step of her stairs with a goofy smile on his face. He remained sitting as he waited for her to walk to him. She sighed inwardly just like always. But at least he has a valid reason right now. It is my house after all. Of course I would be walking towards the front door to go inside. Why should he walk to me – just turn back and walk back from where he had come from. But he could have stood up at least. She started forward once more. "I wasn't aware that we had plans this afternoon, Finn. I'm sorry that you had to wait for me. This is quite unforgivable of me for forgetting that we had plans too meet."
Finn held out his right hand for her to take. Once small hand was engulfed into his huge one he spoke, "Relax Rachel. We didn't have any plans to be together today." He half smiled. "I missed you is all. I wanted to see you."
Her heart melted. This was a side of Finn that no one else got to see. At least not when he was around her. Everyone just saw her being bossy and in charge of the relationship. They thought that Finn was just a big dumb jock whom was always overshadowed by her over the top personality. Rachel just wished Finn would show this side of himself to others.
She allowed him to pull her towards him. She hummed softly as she sat in between his legs on the step. Leaning back against his board chest. "I'm that you are here, Finn. I missed you too." She whispered. She felt his head on her right shoulder blade. His hot breath against her cheek. She looked out at the sunset. She was surprised that the afternoon had quite escaped her.
Rachel had planned on her Sunday afternoon walk in the park to be leisurely … but she thought she would have felt like she had accomplished things before the sunset. Even through she swore to herself to have a day of rest. But even a day of rest – Rachel wanted to feel like she accomplished things.
All she accomplished that afternoon in the park was to have a panic attack. In Quinn Fabray's arms never less. "I have a confession to make to you, Finn."
"Oh?" He said.
"I was in the park today. With the intent on leisurely walking. But I found myself running at top speed, and I ran into Quinn. I had a slight panic attack on her, and I passed out in her arms. Apparently I was out for a few hours – and Quinn kept me in her arms. I just wanted you too know." Rachel stared out at her grass.
"Why did you have a panic attack?" Finn said in a tight voice. "Why the hell didn't Quinn call me." he growled out.
Rachel didn't want to tell Finn the truth about that. She was sure now that Brittany wasn't out to hurt her with her proclamation. She knew that Quinn had told her the truth. She didn't want to add this too Finn's long list on hating Quinn. "I stressed myself out with all my preparation for my future." She leaned against his chest. "Don't blame Quinn for not calling you. Her arms were tightly wound around me when I passed out. I'm sure that she didn't want to disrupt me when she realized I actually feel asleep."
"I'm your boyfriend, Rachel, as Quinn fully knows. She should have called me." Finn tightened his arms more around his girlfriend. "I wonder what she's playing at."
"She's my friend." Rachel simply stated.
Finn barked in a harsh laugh.
Rachel twisted her neck so she was staring into Finn's eyes. "Why that laugh?"
"Quinn isn't your friend, Rachel. She's your enemy." Finn stated. "You fully know this. I mean look how she has treated you over the years. So what that she called off the daily slushy attacks. So what that she called off the name calling … at least from herself, Santana and Brittany. That doesn't matter one freaking wit. She's just playing you. Getting you to fully trust her – and then she'll come at you once and for all."
"Quinn will never hurt me ever again." Rachel said with such sureness.
"How can you fall into her hands so easily, Rachel?" Finn's eyes widen in disbelief.
"It's Quinn, Finn. I had always wanted to be friends with her. Always. Now she has accepted my hand in friendship. I'm not ever going to let it go." Rachel said pulling away from him, standing and moving away from the tall boy.
"She's not your true friend, Rach." Finn stood to his feet and shoved his hands deep into his jeans pockets. "She's just going to hurt you."
"I'm not going to give up on Quinn, Finn, no matter what." Rachel felt the tears slide down her cheeks. "Even if she spends the rest of life hurting me. I have seen the real Quinn Fabray, and I'm not going to allow her to be lost to this world."
"You know something." Finn threw up his hands. "I can't talk to you when you are being like this. Once you get your head on straight, and your heart back to the truth then come find me." He turned and stormed away.
"Finn!" Rachel cried after him.
Finn stopped dead in his tracks. He slowly turned towards his girlfriend. "I am not backing down this time, Rachel. I'm not going to allow Quinn to hurt you. She's out to destroy you and I won't allow it." Turning he stormed away to his truck.
Rachel simply watched Finn pull away from the curb and drive away. Her thin arms wrapped tightly around her chest as she felt chills coarse throughout her body. She couldn't get warm all a sudden.
End Chapter Two
Chapter 4: Only Want Her
Picking up her cell she stared at the contact list. Quickly scrolling down the list until the one name she wanted to find. Her finger posed on the button. Tears rolled freely down her cheeks. The phone dropped from her lifeless fingers. Bowing her head she wrapped her arms over her head. She couldn't stop the heartbreaking sobs from wrenching out from her chest.
"Quinnie!" There was a loud knocking on the outside of her bedroom door.
Quinn tried to get her breath back … but the sobs continued to burst forth. She felt strong arms wrap themselves around her – and she was pulled into a firm chest. "Oh God." She breathed out. "It hurts. It hurts so much." She rasped out.
"Oh Quinnie." Judy cried as she repeatedly run her fingers down the right side of her youngest daughter's face.
Quinn fought against her mother's arms. She couldn't get free no matter how hard she fought. "Let me go. Just let me go."
"Quinnie it's your mommy. It's mommy darling. You are safe." Judy held on tighter to her tiger of a daughter.
"You aren't safe." Quinn finally managed to fight off her mother. She scooted up her headboard. "How can you be safe when you kicked me out of your life." She stared wide eyed at her mother's wide blue eyes. "How can I ever feel safe with you ever again."
"I just want to help." Judy whispered. "I just wanted to help."
"You can't help." Quinn whimpered.
"Who can help? Tell me whom can help, Quinnie." Judy swallowed around the lump in her throat.
Quinn looked down at her cell.
Judy looked down also, and picked up the phone. Her finger taped the scene, and the contact list blinked on. She stared down at the single name that was staring up into her face. "Okay." She swallowed as she pushed the button. Putting the phone to her ear she waited for the person to pick up. "Rachel? This is Quinn's mother, Judy. Nice to hear your voice also. This isn't exactly a social call, Rachel. I need you to come over here right now. Quinn needs you. Thank you. I'll see you then." She pushed the end button as she lowered the phone. "She'll be here in about twenty minutes, dear."
"Just leave me alone." Quinn wrapped her arms around her legs.
"I can't leave you alone, Quinnie. It's not wise." Judy said putting the phone in front of her daughter.
"Please." Quinn whimpered.
"I'm going to leave the door open, darling. If you need anything, anything at all I'll hear you when you call." Judy said standing to her feet.
"I just want her. I just want her." Quinn whispered.
Judy got up and left her daughter's room. With one last sad, and longingly look she walked away from the open door way.
Twenty minutes pass:
Rachel got out of her car and looked up at the Fabray home. Mrs. Fabray was staring out of the window before jerking away. She swallowed thickly as she made her way towards the front of the house. She stopped dead in her tracks as the front door slammed opened.
"Hello Mrs. Fabray." Rachel said in a halting voice. "It's nice to see you once more."
Judy frowned slightly. "I don't recall meeting you before, Rachel."
"We never met face to face before. But I saw you at Regionals. It was nice that you went for Quinn. I know that she loved having you there. She was more upbeat during her performance – then truly any others last year." Rachel smiled. "I saw you around town in the past. Usually when your husband went off on his gay rants against my fathers." Her mouth snapped shut as she just realized what had just tumbled out of her mouth. Foot meet mouth. You need to learn to have a filter on your tongue Rachel. You just told an adult – no you JUST called Quinn's mother out on her gay bashing. It wasn't like she ever joined her husband in bashing my fathers and me. But, she just stood silently by and allowed it to happen. That is just as bad as Mr. Fabray bashing my father's life styles.
Judy had the grace to blush. "I'm not going to apologize for my past mistakes, Rachel. At least not now. I know that mere words can't ever express my deep regret for keeping silent when I knew what Russell was doing was wrong." She blinked back as many tears as she could. "I would like to show you that I have learned – am still learning from my mistakes. If you will allow me too."
"Of course, Mrs. Fabray." Rachel nodded. "If Quinn can work things out with you – her misgivings with you are much worse and bigger than my own – than I can follow her example."
"I'm glad that Quinnie has you in her life, Rachel." Judy softly said. "Have you spoken to Shel – your mother lately?"
"Beth is doing just fine." Rachel softly said. "I stay with Shelby as much as time allows. With school in session I can't really stay at Shelby's during the week. But, I try to go every other weekend. Some weeknights a month I go."
"Do you have any pictures?" Judy hesitantly asked.
Rachel pulled out an album from her bag. "I always carry it around with me. In hopes that Quinn would ask for pictures. I have kept it updated to the most recent picture of two days ago. I have also included a DVD so you can see your granddaughter move." She handed the album over to Quinn's mother.
"Thank you." Judy whispered. She hugged the album tightly to her chest. "Quinn is in so much pain. She won't allow me to comfort her. She only wants you." Tears rolled down her cheeks. "Please help my daughter, Rachel. Please be the comfort that she craves."
Rachel walked up and wrapped her arms around the older Fabray woman. She just held the woman a few moments before stepping away. "I'm glad to finally met you Mrs. Fabray."
Judy blinked. "I'm glad to met myself once more."
Rachel nodded, and moved passed Judy.
Judy bowed her head, and quietly sobbed.
Rachel stopped dead in her steps once she reached Quinn's open doorway. She found the slightly older girl in a fetal position in the center of her bed. Quinn's body was shaking as she tried to control the sobs that were being ripped from her body. Rachel made her way to the bed and sat down.
Reaching out with her right hand she placed on Quinn's quivering back.
Quinn turned around quickly. She wrapped her arms tightly around the slim waist. Burying her face into Rachel's stomach she just sobbed more heart wrenching sobs. She felt Rachel tighten her hold on her. She lost track of time until before she knew it all her sobs were finally through her air waves. She just laid in Rachel's lap as she allowed the short brunette Diva to sooth her.
"Why does today feel like all we did was comfort one another?" Quinn asked after she had sat up. "I mean first I comforted – and protected you in the park this afternoon. Now you are here in my home returning the favor."
Rachel reached over and gently pulled the hair from Quinn's right eye. "Talk to me."
"It hurts all the time." Quinn's left hand slowly rose up to her chest. She rubbed her heart, "It never stops. Everyone whom I talked too – or everything that I read said that I would get over the pain of the loss with time. They are fucking wrong. So ever fucking wrong. Why did they lie to me?" Tears rolled down her cheeks.
"Shelby told me that she never got over the pain of giving me up." Rachel softly said. "That until she was truly reunited with me that the pain lessened too some extent." She softly said. "Shelby is waiting for you to call her to tell her that you want Beth back. She won't fight you."
"Beth is better off with Shelby." Quinn whimpered.
"She's better off with you in her life." Rachel whispered. "Beth loves you. You are her mommy. No one can ever change that. No one can ever replace you, Quinn. Not with your daughter."
"Beth would be simply destroyed if I'm with her." Quinn whispered. "I can't have her here. She would be destroyed even before she got out of baby hold. Like I had been."
"Your father is no longer in your life, Quinn. Your mother loves you and Beth very much." Rachel bowed her head to try to catch Quinn's lowered gaze.
"My mother is very weak. If Russell shows any affection towards Judy once more – then Judy would take Russell back no questions asked." Quinn lifted her eyes to meet Rachel's chocolate brown eyes straight on.
"If Russell ever comes back into your life, then Quinn, your home is with me. My fathers all ready know your situation. They have a room ready for you. " Rachel said wrapping her hands around Quinn's drawn knees. "I have had your room ready for you since I learned you were pregnant. I had a feeling that you may have had a need for some solace at some point. I'm sorry that I never got the courage or the time to allow you to know."
"Why would you do that for me? I made it my mission in life to destroy you." Quinn whimpered. "Why would you do that for me? Even now?"
"We are family." Rachel simply stated.
"Only because I allowed your mother to raise my baby. That doesn't make you and I family." Quinn shook her head.
"You are my family. Long before Beth even came into creation. The moment I set eyes on you, Quinn Fabray, I made you my family." Rachel calmly stated.
Quinn looked dumb struck into the honest chocolate brown eyes that were looking straight into her own haze ones. "Oh God." She whimpered as fresh tears rolled down her cheeks. She began to shake. She tried to get her hand out of Rachel's strong warm ones. But the shorter Diva refused to part with it.
Rachel wrapped her arms tightly around the taller blonde. She moved closer so she could allow Quinn to simply cling to her. "I just want you to know that you aren't alone, Quinn. No matter what happens in your parents lives – you will never be alone. Never again."
"It hurts." Quinn whimpered into Rachel's chest. "It's hurts ever so much. It never ends." She shook her head hard into the welcoming chest that was offered freely to her. "Why won't the pain go away?"
"You are so in love with your child, Quinn. That it's not nature for you to be away from her." Rachel rocked Quinn fowards and backwards gently. "You and Beth belong together. I'm sure that Noah wouldn't mind you changing your mind concerning Beth. Noah always wanted to be able to raise his child."
"I signed the adoption papers." Quinn pulled away slightly. "They have been filed. Beth is legally Shelby's. I'm not going to go back on my word, and break Shelby's heart - all due too the cause that I miss my baby."
"Just give it some thought, Quinn. At least don't keep yourself from Beth forever. My mother understands Beth's need for you, and she fully understands your need for you daughter." Rachel leaned in and peaked Quinn's pale cheek.
"I don't want to be like Russell and be selfish any longer. I can't stand it for myself. I can't stand it on how it makes you feel, Rach, and I especially don't want my beloved Beth to be effected by it at all." Quinn rested her head against Rachel's chest- just above the heart once more. "I have to protect Beth's soul. Even though it means that I can't ever see my precious baby girl ever again."
What do I do to prove you wrong, Quinn? How can I get past your stubborness? I don't want to trick you. But; if that's the only way ... Rachel rested her head against Quinn's.
END CHAPTER THREE
William McKinley's Choir Room:
Rachel hummed as she walked into the choir room. It had been a pretty good week so far. Last week she fully admitted was a very rough one. What with her break down in the park – then Quinn's emotional break down later that night over Beth. It was good to get back onto an even kneel.
At least for the moment.
"Hello Rachel." Brittany said smiling wide from where she was sitting. In Rachel's normal chair.
"Why are you here so early Brittany?" Rachel bluntly asked. She winched at how rude her voice sounded.
"I wanted to spend time with you, alone." Brittany said standing to her feet. She walked across the room and stopped in front of the short Diva. "You haven't made it easy for me to smile at you." Her right hand rose to touch Rachel's cheek, "I miss smiling at you. Don't you miss it?"
Rachel backed away. "Brittany that's not proper." Sighing, "I don't want to be rude or mean towards you – but with you still under the delusion that you have actual feelings for me; it just makes it awkward to be around you. I don't want to hurt you."
"You and I can have a threesome with Quinn." Brittany said with a wide smile. "That way I can have you, and you can have Quinn. Q wouldn't mind. After all she wants to help both of us."
Rachel's eyes had widen during Brittany's comment. Her throat had tightened towards the end – and she was having difficult time breathing. "Don't say things like that Brittany. Y-you mustn't."
Brittany stepped closer, and moved slowly around the short Diva. Leaning down she whispered "Just think about it Rach, you and me, and Quinn. All together in one bed. Naked. Touching one another. Licking one another. Whispering our love for one another as we physically express our love for one another." Her breath lightly touched Rachel's skin as she paused at the back of her neck.
Chocolate brown eyes had widen in shock as Brittany moved in her personal space. The vocal codes that wanted to speak up, and demand that the blond cheerleader remove herself immediately closed down on her. Her cheeks heated up at the first whisper word that Brittany had uttered. Her eyes lost focus, and Rachel slowly closed her eyes to the blackness; as Brittany kept up with her seductively air. Her breath hitched as she began to picture the picture that Brittany was painting with her words.
"We can have it, Rach. We can have it. Just say yes. Then we will all be happy and loved." Brittany breathed. "All you have too do is say yes." She turned her head and gently nipped Rachel's neck.
Rachel couldn't keep the moan from slipping from her mouth.
"Just say yes." Brittany breathed as she licked Rachel's neck.
Rachel opened her mouth just to say that. When a sudden noise in the hallway awoken her to where she was. Her eyes jerked opened and she forced her body to move away from Brittany's seductively pull. She crossed to the other side of the room with her arms folded across her chest for protection. "No." She whispered. She cleared her throat. "No."
Before Brittany could strike once more Mike came in. "Hey ladies." He said with a wide smile on his lips.
"Hello Mike. How are you?" Rachel asked as she showed her mega watt smile at the Asian as she moved to stand at the piano. She had to get her act together – after all the Gleeks counted on her to fully prepared at all times during Glee. She couldn't let her team down. It wasn't professional.
Brittany sighed and went to sit in her normal seat. She knew that there was no hope in reaching Rachel with Mike Chang in the room. She eyed him and wondered why she never had bothered to having bedded him before. He was hot. She shook her head. She couldn't do that to Tina. After all Tina and Mike just recently became an item.
Soon the other Gleeks came into the room. Kurt and Mercedes came in with their heads together gossiping as always. Santana came in and sat next to her as always. Brittany felt Santana's hand on her thigh just underneath the Cheerio skirt. She shook her head as she moved over a few inches. "I said no more, San." She hissed from the side of her mouth.
Santana sighed as she leaned back in her chair. Her chin jerked up as she watched the other Gleeks get settled in her seat. But she really kept a sharp eye on one Rachel Berry. She could tell that Rachel was off her game more so than usual. She fully well knew it had nothing at all to do with Finn Hudson – whom currently was hanging all over the midget.
"Finn, if you don't mind." Rachel said in an annoyed voice. "I'm trying to get the sheet music ready for Mr. Schue. Otherwise you know that man will just want to go off on the worst 80's music known to man kind. You know that I simply can not allow us to be sidetracked anymore by his non sense."
"Rach." Finn touched her cheek. She jerked away quickly. He frowned in concern. "You are warm. Are you feeling all right? Do you think it's best that you go home and rest?"
Rachel huffed. "I'm quite all right Finn." Her eyes glanced passed him to the door, and saw Quinn. She paled.
"Babe?" Finn said in concern as he wrapped his arms around his girlfriend, and pulled her into him. "Rachel?"
Rachel shook her head. She looked up into the deeply concern eyes of Finn. "I'm all right Finn." She softly said. She wrapped her arms tightly around his board back, and lifted her toes up so her mouth could meet his. Once his lips were on her own; she very quickly deepened the kiss.
Quinn eyes were glued onto the seriously making out couple just a few feet from her. Her head slowly turned and met the angry glare of Puck. She tilted her head towards the still kissing couple. Puck nodded roughly twice.
"Rachel." Finn breathed out as he pulled out from the kiss. Licking his lips he blushed as he realized that they were in the choir room, and he felt ten set of eyes locked on him. Before he could ask Rachel what she thought she was doing kissing him that way in front of everyone – Rachel's lips were back on his. He couldn't help it. He just wrapped his arms tighter around his girlfriend and deepened the kiss. His tongue shoved into her mouth as he just claimed what was rightfully his.
Rachel pulled away red faced. She turned sharply too find the shock looks of all the Gleeks glued on her. She straightened her skirt and blouse. "Now THAT'S what is expected of your lead female and male signers. THAT'S the passion that is expected for us to WIN at Nationals." She walked to her seat and sat down. She watched as Finn beat red made his way to sit next to her.
Quinn felt her feet move once more. Walking towards the chair she sat down next to Rachel. Turning to speak to her friend she was nonplussed at the freaked out expression on the Diva's face as she moved closer to Finn. She wrapped Finn's arms protectively around her.
Finn just smiled a dopey smile as he just snuggled deeper into his girlfriend. He couldn't wait until Glee was over. He wanted to finish what Rachel had promised with those two kisses. He willed himself to calm down – it wouldn't do for the entire Gleeks to know what he planned on doing was the required hour was through. Well, he didn't want all the ladies to want the Finn man after all. He only wanted Rachel – she would be plenty to keep him quite happy in between the sheets. Well – in the backseat of his car. There was no way in hell he would be able to make it home – or to Rachel's house before he exploded.
Quinn stared at herself in her vanity mirror. She took a deep swallow breath. She had to remind herself to keep breathing. Her mind cast back to a week previous in Glee. How could Rachel do that to herself? How could Rachel have allowed herself to be looked upon as a slut to the Gleeks? To anyone? What has gotten into Rachel?
Quinn had desperately been trying to ask the short Diva these very questions all week – but Rachel had been avoiding her at all cost. That day after Glee she had grabbed Finn's hand and rushed him from the room before Quinn could finish saying her name. Quinn had stopped by the Berries to speak to Rachel in private about it – but Kristopher had told her that Rachel wasn't home. Quinn knew it was a lie – she could read Kristopher Berry's eyes like a book.
The blond cheerleader had tried calling and texting the Diva well past two in the morning. But no answer. She had decided to trap her at her locker – but Rachel had Finn firmly at her side the entire time. Quinn couldn't get Finn to leave – not solely due to Rachel's orders – Finn didn't want to leave himself.
Quinn decided to corner Rachel in the bathroom. Only thing was that Rachel was never alone in any of the bathrooms. Every time Quinn had obviously stood around waiting for the other girls to leave – Rachel would leave among the crowd herself.
Quinn grew so desperate that she had considered ordering a slushy attack on the brunette. But she only managed to will herself not too – do to her undying promise to herself that she would never ever do that again to Rachel – or to anyone else.
Quinn looked to the right of her mirror at the picture of Rachel that she had posted on it. She just glazed with tears brimming at the smiling Diva. "Why are you so angry at me Rach? What have I done to make you hate me so much?" She whispered as she lightly traced the picture.
Rachel's living room:
"I want to thank you for allowing me into yourself, Mr. Berry." Judy said with a nervous smile.
"You aren't your husband, Mrs. Fabray." Giovanni said with a kind smile.
"Soon too be ex-husband." Judy stated quickly. "The sooner the better. I just want Russell out of Quinnie's life once and for all."
Giovanni cleared his throat.
"It's okay to vocally agree with me Mr. Berry." Judy said with a smile.
"Giovanni." Giovanni replied.
"Judy." Judy said with a small smile. Holding out her hand. When his callous hand met her small one, "It's a pleasure to finally meet you Giovanni. I look forward to getting to know you and your husband better."
"As do we you." Giovanni covered the back of her hand with his free hand. "Now may I ask why are we honored with this pleasant visit?"
Judy took her hand back. "I'm trying desperately to stay out of Quinnie's life. Trying to allow my daughter to fun her life as she see's fit. To prove to her that I trust her judgments." She worried her lower lip.
"But this thing with Rachel is hurting you – just as much as it hurts Kristopher and I." Giovanni nodded as he waved his right hand to the couch. After the blond woman sat down he sat down also. Sighing deeply, "I don't know what is hurting Rachel so much right now. She hasn't confided in Kris or I." Shaking his head. "I know that Quinn didn't do anything against my daughter, Judy, but still Rachel is hurt due to Quinn."
"Quinn doesn't know what she has done to harm Rachel." Judy said. "Just last week Rachel was over at the house comforting Quinn over the loss of Beth. They had bonded even more deeply due to that – now two weeks later they aren't speaking together. They aren't in the same room alone together."
"Rachel doesn't shut down on my husband and I; expect for the rarest of all times. This is one of those times." Giovanni sighed leaning against the back of the couch cushions. "I just don't know how to help my little girl when she refuses to allow me in."
"Quinnie had never even allowed me to enter. I deserved it when she was a little girl. I never allowed myself to show my honest love for her to show. I was worried about Russell harming her more than he all ready had been doing if I showed my love for her. I lost her sister from the moment she was born." Judy frowned. "I knew that my first born didn't love me from the moment I looked into her eyes. But when Lucy was born – I knew the love of a child. My child. But; by then five years had passed and I had seen Russell as a father. I couldn't allow Lucy to be harmed due to me." Judy worried her bottom lip. "I had too protect my beloved baby the only way I knew how. To deny her my heart."
"Now that I finally managed to rid Quinnie of Russell's influence – it's much too late to allow Quinn to get my heart." Judy felt tears falling freely down her cheeks.
Giovanni leaned forward, and put a hand on the blond woman's hand. "It's never too late, Judy."
Judy gathered herself as much as she could. "I actually came here to speak with Rachel. Is she available?"
Rachel traced Quinn's outline through the glass of the photo frame in her hand. "I miss you." She whispered. "Ever so much." She was laying length ways on her bed. Her feet up against her headboard. "But I can't be with you. Not now. Not with my feelings out in the open as they are."
She thought about the past week. The week from sheer hell.
Every time she felt Quinn's eyes on her in Glee that day – she had moved even closer to Finn to protect herself from Quinn's gaze. She had decided that an active public display of affection for her boyfriend was in order. She just didn't realize that she couldn't chase her desire away as quickly as she had prayed that she would.
Every time that she claimed Finn's lips it felt wrong. Like it was missing something. Kissing Finn was like escaping from her safe place. It had always been like that. But she couldn't rely on her safe place – her home – because that was Quinn.
Even before Quinn decided to take her up on her offer of friendship – after Beth was born; Rachel knew that she would never get what her heart desired the most. Home. Quinn was as straight as they came – even if she wasn't – there was no way Quinn would be able to be with her. Not with Russell Fabray as her father. Rachel decided to live with the fact that she would never be safe in her life.
Besides with her fathers of course. But her fathers wouldn't be with her all the time. Even now that she still lived with them – they couldn't be with her twenty – four seven. It just wasn't possible. She thought perhaps she had found a safe haven in Finn Hudson. If Quinn herself felt safe with the giant quarter back – than Rachel would be safe with him also.
Yes Rachel felt guilty for stealing Finn's affection from Quinn. But she learned that it was Noah and not Finn that was the father of Quinn's baby – she pushed the guilt to the back of her mind. Not her heart – her mind.
Rachel always figured that kissing Finn was like kissing Quinn ….
Rachel's thoughts escaped her as there was a knock on the door. "Yes?" Her head turned towards the door. Waiting for one of her father's to reply.
Instead of replying the door opened and her dad entered.
"Someone is here to see you Rae." Giovanni said stepping aside to allow Judy Fabray into the room.
Rachel blinked. "M-mrs. Fabray." She rolled to the side and sat up. Her mouth went dry.
"I need to know what is going on between you and Quinnie, Rachel." Judy said with a tear rolling down her cheeks. "Why are you both so depressed?" She played with her hands in front of her stomach.
"It's complicated." Rachel frowned.
Judy's frowned deepened. "I don't buy that Rachel Berry. You will either tell me what is going on or you will fix this issue with Quinnie." Her voice harden even more. "Now."
Rachel looked Judy deep in the eyes. "You don't want me to fix this. Not with the truth." She sighed deeply, "The truth would just destroy Quinn even more than my avoidance." She bit her lower lips, "I won't be avoiding Quinn for much longer. I just have to work things firmly out inside myself before I can be with Quinn again." She absentmindedly played with her hands in her lap. "I don't want to lose Quinn. But I know that if I'm around her – or in communication with her right now – then she'll be lost to me for all time."
"You're in love with her." Judy said with such sureness.
Rachel's eyes widen. "Oh God." She breathed.
Judy was about to speak when she saw the young girl on the bed began to freak out. Rachel was hyperventilating and quickly was turning a dark shade of purple. Judy quickly knelt down in front of the young girl – grabbing the shaking hands tightly in her own. "Rachel! Listen to me Rachel. I want you to concrete on my voice. Rachel, you need to calm down. I want you to breath slowly in than slowly out. Come on Rachel, do it with me. Inhale …. exhale …. inhale …. exhale – that's it dear. Now keep doing it. Inhale … exhale …. inhale …. exhale."
Rachel slowly came back from the dark place that she had entered due to lack of oxygen. Her eyes slowly came back into focus. She found the deeply concerned eyes of an older version of Quinn at eye level with her. "Q-quinn?"
Judy waited until she saw that Rachel was once more herself. Although the teen did withdrew deep within herself. "You aren't going to lose Quinnie, Rachel. Not with your love." Her hand tightened on the slim waist underneath her, "Quinnie isn't going too lose me either. No matter if she in facts returns your love. I'm not Russell. I won't deny true love with I see it."
Quinn's living room:
Judy walked into the living room and was almost knocked down by her youngest. "What did you do to her?" Quinn growled low in her voice.
Judy stepped back a step. She feared that in her daughter's current state – Quinn may actually hurt her. "I didn't do anything to her."
"Don't lie to me." Quinn's eyes leapt fire.
"I would never harm Rachel." Judy said in a calm steady voice.
"Then why is she more broken now ever since you were with her; then she has been this past week!" Quinn demanded wrapping her arms protectively around her waist. A lone hot tear rolled down her cheek.
They feel each other so deeply. Judy blinked. "The only reason why I went too see Rachel, was to beg her to tell me why is is avoiding you."
Quinn felt her raw anger rise even higher than before. Her arms flew from her waist to the sides, "You HAD NO RIGHT!" She screamed. "I'LL NEVER FORGIVE YOU FOR THIS!" She stormed from the room.
The front door slam shut, and Judy was afraid that the walls would crave in due to the shock.
"Please Rachel ….." Judy whispered begged.
END CHAPTER FOUR
Although Judy has informed Giovanni that Quinn's real first name is Lucy; Rachel and the rest of the Gleeks still don't know this little fact. That tidbit will be for a later chapter for the Junior Prom.
"Tonight is the night." Finn said as he straightened his comforter. He made sure that the entire bed would met Rachel's high strand rends. After all he didn't want a miss crease to destroy Rachel's first time. He wanted to make it perfect. That was why he didn't fight Rachel on not giving into their passion that day in Glee a week ago. Yes he had been highly disappointed that Rachel didn't want him deep inside her after practice … but he could tell that she truly wanted hm in that moment.
But her romantic dreams for her first time had stopped her. He loved her enough to fight down the passion, and not try to talk her into it that day. He didn't want to destroy her complete trust in him. He felt his face heat up, he after all was keeping the biggest secret from her. He was no longer a virgin. He had drunkenly giving his V-card to Santana the previous year. Only because he had thought that Rachel had slept with St. James. Once she had told him that she hadn't he knew that he could never ever tell her that he had given it away to Santana. Santana Lopez of all people would simply just crush Rachel.
Tonight he would finally get to express his love for the sex goddess that Rachel Berry was. Even through he was more than a foot taller than the Diva – he found her to be one hot well to be a boy just beginning his puberty – hot mama. Tonight he was going to make her completely his.
He couldn't wait.
"Finn's planning on sexing up Rachel tonight." A deep blush darken the gay boy's cheeks. He couldn't believe what he had said. But quite honestly he couldn't think of another way of expressing what his step brother was going too do to the short Diva. Sides if he said 'making love' than that would be a lie. He wouldn't do that to Rachel.
"What!" Puck roared into his ear. "Do not ever saying 'sexing up' about my Jewish girl ever again, Hummel." He felt fire enter his soul.
"S-sorry." Kurt strutted. "Look we have to stop this."
"Leave it too me." Puck growled. "I love Finn like a brother. But, I'm not going to let him hurt Rachel. No way no how. Not ever again. Not in a way that I can ever fix."
"If you are the one to prevent Finn getting Rachel's – don't hate me for this tasteless lack of phasing, Puck – cherry, then Finn would hate you more than he ever did over Beth." Kurt said in a quiet rush. He was trying too keep an ear out for Finn passing his bedroom door.
Kurt could hear a loud bang on Puck's end of the line. He knew the Jewish Mohawk boy hand just punched the wall. He winced because he knew Puck had pictured that it was Finn's face.
"Look Puck, truth be told, Rachel Berry isn't my favorite person in the world. Not by a long shot. But I can't sit back and allow her too lose something so important as her virginity on a whim. We all know that her romance with my step brother will fizzle out pretty soon." Kurt sighed as he leaned against his dresser. "I just don't want her too be a Broadway damage starlet before she reaches Broadway."
Puck growled low in his throat. "Watch what you say man. I may pound your face in after I pound Finn's."
"I'm speaking the truth." Kurt almost lost his voice at how high pitch it was. Ever since freshmen year and Noah Puckerman's favorite sport was throwing him in the dumpster – he had never feared for his life. But ever since Puck had become so protective of Rachel the previous years – all bets were off where Rachel was concern.
"You are lying." Puck hissed. "Look I'm glad you are keeping an eye out for Rachel – and calling me about this sick idea of Finn's." He punched the wall once more. Enlarging the crack that his fist had made on the first punch. "Why don't you befriend Rachel, and protect her yourself."
Kurt's eyes widen in shock. "Are you high Puck?" His voice hitched up in a high squeal.
"If you aren't a friend of Rachel's, then you are her enemy. " Puck said in a dead tone. "I take great pleasure in harming her enemies."
"This is Rachel freaking Diva Berry we are talking about here, Puck. I can't go from my Divaness and accept her Divaness." Kurt shot quickly back. "I can handle Mercedes …. only because Mercedes has no problem sharing Divaness with me. To Rachel Berry – she's the only Diva around." He sighed as he sank down onto his bed. "I can't have a total selfish bitch on my hands man. Look I just wanted to tell you what Finn has planned – so you can put a end to it."
"It's all an act." Puck quietly said. "Rachel's selfishness is a total poodoo act. Man, she needs you in her life. In her corner. She just doesn't know how to ask you – she's afraid to be rejected." He felt a hot tear roll down his cheek. "Can you blame her? Look what we all had done to her since meeting her."
"She has you and Quinn." Kurt said in a unsure voice. "She'll have all of Broadway once she leaves Lima, Ohio. She'll be fine."
"You are going to regret this stubborn decision for the rest of your life." Puck hung up without a goodbye.
Kurt stared across the room with wide teary eyes.
"Hey man." Finn said leaning into the doorway. "Time we head to school." His smile left his face at the sight of his step brother. "Kurt what's wrong?" He walked in and sat down next to the slightly younger boy. He swung his free arm across his thin shoulders.
"N-nothing." Kurt fought to clear his throat. "I was just thinking."
"About?" Finn said as he pulled his trembling step brother into his embrace. He wrapped his free arm around Kurt's heaving chest.
"About my past treatment of Rachel." Kurt hung his head.
Finn stiffened. But than he relaxed. This was the first time that he had seen Kurt actually truly regret his treatment against Rachel. This was Kurt's turning point against the love of his life – he wasn't going to allow his anger to destroy it. "Does this mean …."
"It means that I'm finally going to get over my damn jealously of the pint size Diva; and get on with getting to know the real Rachel Berry." Kurt whispered in the cork of Finn's neck.
"Good." Finn said with a wide smile over Kurt's greased hair. He squeezed Kurt's shoulder once more before pulling away from the thin fragile boy. "You'll see the soul that have fallen completely in love with." He jumped to his feet. "Come on time to get to school." He rushed from the room.
Kurt frowned deeply after his step brother. I'm sorry that you are going to be deeply hurt Finn, but it's the only way to protect Rachel.
Outside Quinn's history classroom:
"Look we have to tell Rachel about Finn and Santana." Puck said with his back against the wall. He kept looking out for Rachel to walk down the hallway – also keeping sideways glances at Quinn.
Quinn leaned against the wall next to him. Her eyes were darting equally as his. "We can't be the ones to tell Rachel."
"Tell Rachel what?" Brittany asked stopping in front of the two teens.
"Nothing B." Quinn waved her hand dismissively.
Brittany frowned. "I may not be as smart as you Quinn Fabray, but I care about Rachel just as much as you do. If not more." She whispered the last.
Puck's left eyebrow rose. He had heard Brittany's whisper. Even through he knew Quinn's mind was lost in ways of protecting Rachel from Finn; that she had quite turned a death ear on Brittany. He didn't even know if Quinn even heard Brittany clear spoken words.
Quinn blinked. "Of course you are smart as me, Brittany."
"You think me stupid." Brittany frowned. She shrugged. "It's okay with me. As long as you protect me at McKinley I don't mind you thinking me dumb."
Quinn reached out and wrapped her arms around the taller blond. Pulling her friend tightly against her. "I love you Brittany. I don't just keep you by my side just to protect you. I keep you by my side to protect myself." She whispered in the Dutch's ear.
Brittany rested her head against Quinn's blond head. "I love you Quinn." She whispered.
"I love you to Brittany." Quinn whispered.
Rachel stopped in her tracks. Her eyes huge at the sight of the two hugging blond cheerleaders down the hall. She felt her pours open as heated sweat started to leak out of it. She could feel the warmth flood from the top of her head – straight down to her toes. She felt her heart pick up speed as her breath hitched in her chest. Her arms tightened around the book, and the binder at her chest as she slightly moaned her pleasure.
Rachel blinked as she came to realize where she currently was. Right smack in the middle of a crowded hallway at McKinley high school. She felt heat pool in her panties. She blushed as she realized how truly turned on she was at the sight of Quinn and Brittany hugging. It was just a simple hug for crying out loud. Two friends hugging each other. It happened all the time in life.
Well not really for Rachel. Expect for the beginning of Sophomore year …. when Noah finally became her friend. Then Quinn became her friend over the summer. But really Rachel didn't get much public friendship hugs – she wouldn't know how to handle them if she got them all the time. But, all the years of her watching others – she knew what a true friendship was.
Quinn and Brittany's hug was a true friendship hug.
Then why was she all hot and bothered by it? It was quite silly really. She just wanted Quinn. Not Brittany. Just Quinn. Even through Rachel fully knew she would never have Quinn. Expect as a friend. Someone to bond over the lack of Shelby and Beth.
Rachel was going to give her fully to Finn that night after Glee practice. She felt her heart sank as she thought of the tall boy whom should have her heart and soul. At least he'll have her body. She just had too push her feelings for Quinn way deep to the bottom of her heart. Perhaps Finn would steal her heart and soul someday. She prayed that would be the case.
Rachel had to get away from the hallway. Before she became unglued with her lust for one Quinn Fabray. She didn't want to embarrass herself – or hurt Quinn for the world. With one last longingly glance at the hugging blonds; she managed to force herself to turn around and, rush from the scene.
Quinn gently pulled Brittany from her. "Perhaps you can help us here, Brittany. We need Santana to tell the truth about her taking Finn's V-card last year. Rachel must know."
"I tried." Brittany sighed. "Last week. I tried to get San to agree. But she's being quite stubborn about it."
Quinn's brows crinkled. "That's not like Santana. Not at all. She just loves hurting people. Especially Rachel. Seeing how Rachel and Finn actually got together this year; and considering how lovely durably they are – you would think S. would just drool at the thought of hurting Rachel with the fact that she fucked Finn." She growled. "After all she just loved to brag about that too me."
"She wants Rachel to remain with Finn." Brittany said.
A quizzical eye brow rose high on Quinn's forehead. "Why?"
Brittany paled. "I don't know what is running in San's mind right now. We aren't sharing lady kisses any longer."
A faint blush rose in Quinn's cheeks at the thought of two girls kissing …. touching one another in intimate places. Her father's rough upbringing slammed the shameful thoughts from her minds eye.
Quinn's not ready yet. Brittany sighed as she pushed down her words to get Quinn to agree to have a threesome with Rachel and her. If I push to early on – than I'll scare Q. away for good. Without Quinn then I can never share lady kisses with Rachel. Quinn is the key to Rachel's heart. Her eyes shifted as she watched Finn start down the hallway. "We need to convince Finn too tell the truth."
Quinn and Puck had sighted Finn at the exact same time. "He'll never do it." They grumbled in unison.
"Who else in Glee knows about Finn?" Brittany raised her right eye brow. "Perhaps we can get Kurt and Mercedes to be gossiping so Rachel can over hear." She shook her head. "No, I don't want to put Kurt in that position."
"I think I'm going to have too be the one to tell Rach." Quinn sighed. "I don't want her to find out from overhearing gossip. I don't want her too feel like she's the last one too know the truth."
"Even through she is." Puck growled low in his throat. "I should be the one too tell her."
Quinn shook her head. "No."
"I'm going to be there when you do it. She'll need me." Puck firmly said. "She won't be able too handle this truth without my being able to protect her in my arms."
Empty science room:
"Berry I have decided to play nice with you." Santana said after she pushed Rachel into the empty science room. She watched with glee as the shorter Diva had hastened across the room. Away from her. "I'm not going to harm you." She sighed, "I promised Brittany that I'll play nice with you."
Rachel clenched her arms around her waist. "Look Santana I don't want any trouble with you. Not today." She clenched her jaw tightly, "I'm actually quite tired of butting heads with you. I mean now that Quinn has accepted my friendship – and you are Quinn's right hand woman – I don't see why you don't accept my hand in friendship also."
That can actually work to my advantage better than what I originally had thought. "Would you believe that I have decided to accept your friendship out right? So sudden like?" Santana's right eyebrow rose high on her forehead.
Rachel thought for a hard few moments. "Yes." She simply said.
Santana blinked. Wow. She's actually truthful. Perhaps as I destroy her – Man hands will learn that there are truly evil people out there. People who truly want her destroy. Perhaps what I'm going too do to her will prepare her for New York – and the rest of the world. That will be my good deed for Rachel Berry. Brittany can't hate me for that now can she? "Okay." She swallowed around the thickness that suddenly caked onto her tongue.
Rachel smiled in relief.
"As a show of friendship I'm going too tell you the truth about Finn Hudson." Santana sighed. "I took his V-card last year. It was quick. It was sloppy. It was unmemorable."
Rachel shook her head. "N-no that can't be true. Finn has assured me and reassured me countless times that he never slept with you."
Santana looked Rachel dead in the eyes. "Had he ever met your eyes even once during all that 'reassuring'?" She tasked her tongue, "Thought not." As the truth hit Rachel full in the eyes. "Look I know that you are planning on sleeping with him at some point in your relationship with the boy. Thought you should have heads up that he had his penis inside me. I think you should have the right too know what he may pass on too you."
Fear entered Rachel's eyes.
"Get that boy tested completely before you allow his penis inside you." Santana turned and left the room. She patted herself on the back for getting to Rachel before Quinn, Puck and Brittany. There was no way now that Rachel could be protected from the full and harsh truth. She took out her cell phone: Part one of the plan is complete. Part two will be put in action after the fall out. She sent it to the block number.
Finn hummed to himself as he strolled into the choir room. He found Rachel sitting on the piano bench with her knees pressed tightly against each other, and her arms across her waist. Her head was tilted downward and he ducked his head a little and saw that she had a deep frown on her beautiful face. Oh man what has upset her? I don't want her to be in such a downer mood for her night tonight. Hopefully it will just be about something with one of the songs selections of Mr. Schue's – I can cheer her up quickly enough. He moved over and knelt beside his girlfriend. "Hey Rach." He said with love in his voice as he reached over to touch her hand.
She jerked sideways away from him banging her right arm hard against the closed piano lid. She had tears spilling out of her tear ducts and down her cheeks. Rachel's eyes widen as she looked into Finn's open and concerned eyes. "Don't touch me." She hissed.
"Rach." Finn's eyes widen in confusion. He was confused on what he could possibility had done to warrant this statement from Rachel. They had a very good day that day. There was absolutely no problems at all concerning them. What happened in the past hour since he last seen her. He reached out for her once more.
"I said don't touch me EVER again." Rachel yelled.
Finn sat back on his haunches in fear. "What have I done?" He whispered keeping a close eye on his emotional girlfriend.
"You lied to me." Rachel said with fire in her eyes.
Oh no. Finn closed his eyes. "I can explain." He moaned.
"How can you explain that you willing lied to me about fucking Santana! I asked you repeatedly for the truth Finn." Rachel raged. She watched as his eyes opened and met her angry glare. "I all ready knew that you fucked Santana. I may be a virgin – but I know the look of someone who's been laid. All I wanted from you was the truth. You couldn't even give me that!"
"I didn't want to hurt you." Finn said in a low voice.
Rachel barked in laughter. "You did a swell job on that."
"I knew that you wanted your first time with me to be my first time also. I knew that you wanted us to be each others first – that way our love story would be perfect." Finn chocked on the sob that burst forth. "I'm so sorry for stealing that away from you Rach."
"After I knew that you gave up you V-card last year – all I wanted from you was the truth. I could have handled my not being your first and only, Finn. Like you were going to be mine." Rachel wiped the hot tears from her right cheek. "But this lie I can't handle. I can't allow myself to accept the lie that you told me. I can't allow you to be my first or my only." Shaking her head, "I can't allow you to be my anything. Not anymore."
Finn had tears running down his cheeks by now. "Please Rach, say that this isn't it for all time. Please tell me that I haven't ruined us for all time. Tell me this isn't the end."
Rachel looked him straight in the eyes. "I can't." She whispered.
"Rachel?" Quinn rushed over to the seated Diva with Finn at her knees. She wrapped her arms around the shivering brunette and pulled her tightly against her.
Rachel wrapped her arms tightly around Quinn's back, and pulled herself tightly against the head cheerleader. She wanted to climb inside Quinn to allow Quinn to protect her. She just settled with resting her head against the blond's neck. At curve between her collarbone to where the neck met. "Oh God." She moaned.
Quinn tucked her head just underneath Rachel's right cheek. "It's going to be all right Rachel, I promise you that it will be all right."
Rachel moved closer and whimpered.
"I'm never going to leave you." Quinn whispered in her ear.
Rachel jerked away. Eyes wide she just stared into Quinn's open hazel eyes. "N-no." She moaned a guttural moan. She was suddenly on her feet staring down into the shocked Quinn's eyes. She turned and rushed from the room.
"Rachel!" Quinn shouted after her fleeing friend. She couldn't move her body to save her life. She just stared as Rachel was taken from her line of sight. She could hear Rachel's whimpers all the way down the hallway.
Will had stood silently with his arms across his chest as he stared concerning at Rachel whom had been sitting on the piano bench for the past hour. He fully knew that this wasn't her free period. But he felt like he would have harm her more by talking to her – than just leaving her to herself. He went back into the office to work on some paper work. But he kept the door open – in case Rachel wanted him for anything. Only silence remained.
He had check on her ten minutes later – she was still sitting in the exact same place that he had last seen. He had a thought of either getting Quinn or Puck to take care of the short Diva – those two recently have more of a way with Rachel than anyone at William McKinely High school ever did. But he still felt like Rachel would withdraw deeper within herself if he did that. He went back to the office and attempted to work more.
He had stopped pretending to attempt to work in his office two minutes after he had returned. He thought of calling Emma for advice. But thought that would be like betraying Rachel. He just wheeled his chair to the open door way, and just simply watched Rachel. After he got tired of sitting he just leaned against the door frame with his arms across his chest.
Finn came into the room and went to Rachel. Will thought of leaving the two teens to talk privately but than Rachel reacted the way she did. Before Will could step into the room, and help the two teenagers love birds ….. all hell broke loose.
"She still hates me." Quinn moaned wrapping her arms tightly around her waist. Her eyes still glued to the door in which Rachel had ran out of.
"She doesn't hate you." Puck wrapped his arms around his baby mama and held her to him tightly. "She's just upset is all. Once she allows this intentional reaction to settle she'll seek you out." He had wanted to rush after his Jewish sister – but he felt like Rachel's spirit was telling him to take care of Quinn right now.
Brittany looked to where Finn still sat on the floor where he had plumped when he realized that his lie was destroyed where Rachel was concerned. She turned her head and saw Santana sitting in her normal chair. Santana turned her eyes on hers and lifted her hands slowly. "I'm glad that you finally told Rachel the truth San. I'm sorry that Rachel has too be hurt. But she had too be freed from the truth."
Finn turned his eyes onto Santana. His anger rose. "You!" He growled as he stood to his feet.
"I only did the thing that you should have done months ago!" Santana's voice harden. "Hell you should have just told Rachel that you slept with me after the deed was done. She was still with Jesse after all." She laughed low in her voice. "I thought you would have loved to have bragged about your conquest knowing that loser St. James was just using her to bring down New Directions."
"You had no right Santana!" Finn stormed.
"You are right man, Santana had no right to tell Rachel the truth." Puck had let Quinn go as he stood up behind his still former best friend. Hate oozed off his face, "You should have just told Rachel the truth about your damn V-card last year. She would have understood."
Finn slowly turned around and looked into Puck's disgust face. "I know." He whispered. Tears rolled down his cheeks. "I know that I fucked up big time. I know that there will be no way that Rachel will take me back after this. She'll forgive me …. but she'll never love me ever again." He bowed his head. "I know that I'm at fault here."
"I would punch you so hard right now, Finn, if I thought that it would do any good." Puck snarled. "But I knew this is what would happen once Rachel learned the truth of you lying to her. I hate you for what you did to my Jewish girl. I won't forgive you for a very long time for this." He breathed in long and deep. "What did you do – plan this hurt me for what I did too you over Quinn and Beth."
Finn's eyes widen. "No." He whelped. "I would never knowing or unknowing hurt Rachel due to my being angry at you. I'm an idiot. I freely admit it. What I did to Rachel was uncalled for. I should have told her the truth. I should have allowed her the time to deal with the fact that I wasn't a virgin any longer – and couldn't give her myself as the precious gift that she wanted. I should have just waited until she was ready to give herself to me. Instead of keeping that most important fact from her."
"Kurt make sure Finn gets home safely." Puck looked to the right at where Kurt was standing with his eyes wide.
"I will." Kurt swallowed around his Adam's apple. He walked over and put his hand on his step brother's right shoulder, "Come on Finn. You won't do any good staying here right now."
Finn bowed his head and allowed his shorter step brother to led him from the choir room.
Puck turned his eyes on the remaining seven members of the Glee club. "If any one of you decided to use this as armor against Rachel – think again. If I even get one whiff of any malice gossip than be ware I won't go easy on you."
No one said anything. They couldn't. They knew that Puckerman would just read that they were just being fake about it. Which none of them totally were. Well all expect Santana. But she knew how to hide her pure evilness.
Sam stood to his feet and moved his way to where Quinn still sat with her arms tightly around herself. "Quinn." He gently said as he knelt down. He placed a hand on her right hand. "Let's get you home shall we?"
Quinn just sat still as a statue.
Puck bent over and gently picked her up in bridal style. "I'm going to need you to drive us to Quinn's place, Sam. I feel she'll need both of us for this."
Sam had stood to his feet as Puck had lifted his girlfriend into his arms. He didn't feel jealous by this at all. He knew that Puck and Quinn shared a connection – that not even having their child with them could ever break. He led the way out of the room and towards the parking lot.
END CHAPTER FIVE
Okay Finn Hudson is completely out of the running for a possible pairing for Rachel. Finn is going to be finally moving on past the whole Quinn/Finn/Rachel love trinagle that Glee has been playing out for the past three years now. Finn and Quinn WON'T be getting back together in the story.
Not even for the Prom section of the story. I was going to allow Quinn/Finn back together – but when I wrote the whole Rachel breaking things off with Finn for lying to her in this chapter – I knew that I couldn't allow Quinn/Finn to happen. I'll think of another way for Quinn to go out of the way to win prom Queen for Junior Prom.