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Dairy Diaries

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"Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!" Chloe chanted, pounding her fists on the dining room table. Max took the carton to her lips in an instant, swallowing the milk down as quick as she could. The chilliness of the liquid gave her something akin to a mild brain freeze, but at this point she was just throwing caution to the wind.

"Come on, Mad Max, you can do better than that," Chloe smirked, "I believe in you! Come on, make Mama Chloe proud!"

Max shook her head vigorously, knowing that if she went any quicker she would risk drowning, but tried it anyway. At this point there was milk dribbling down her chin and neck. But in that moment, it didn't matter. Maxamillion was the milk queen and she would worry about the consequences later. Her life had been hard enough that week as it was, hell if she wasn't going to have a little fun.

When Max finally got towards the end of the jug, she could feel tears of victory prick at her eyes. She took the final sip, slammed the carton of milk back down on the table, and wiped at the edge of her mouth. "Yeah! Chloe, holy shit, I fucking did it!"

"I knew you could all along."

"Yeah, that's totally why you bet me twenty bucks that I couldn't. Hand it over, Chloe."

Chloe sighed as she fished into her pockets for her wallet. "All I've got is pocket change right now, but I'll pay it to you over time. With interest, even!"

Max laughed, feeling her stomach turning at all the milk inside of it. She leaned forward a bit with her hand held tight over her stomach, "I'd expect nothing less."

Hours later, she realized maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all.

Max, writhing around on the bathroom floor, started to think back to what events in her life could have led her here. There was being born, that was a big one. Meeting Chloe, liking Chloe, befriending Chloe, falling in love with Chloe. Come to think of it, all of the good and bad things that had happened in her life usually started with Chloe. This was, without a doubt, one of the bad things.

"Eugh, why did I agree to that?!" she blubbered, "We both knew how that was going to turn out, and I did it anyway. Come to think of it, why did you challenge your lactose intolerant girlfriend to chug a litre of milk? Are you trying to off me?"

Chloe snickered, making a mock pouty face as she leaned on the door frame. "Nah, milk isn't lethal to you. It just makes you a little bit sick. If I wanted to off you I'd be doing it in a better way, you should know that."

The brunette narrowed her eyes and rolled away from her blue haired counterpart. "I'm gonna make you eat, like, seven dates."

"Max, those are gross! No way in Hell."

"Then maybe I shouldn't be the one cooking from now on?"

Chloe's eyes widened as she realized what her girlfriend was implying. Max did have a container of dates in the fridge. She frantically started spinning in circles, trying to get straight what she needed to do, before running towards the kitchen. "Uhm, I'll make lunch today! Dinner, too."

Max laughed hysterically, wincing with each breath as the pains from the milk were amplified with every noise. Maybe she was still slightly delirious from chugging an entire litre of milk, but something made her think that maybe this was a good idea after all. Sure, she was rolling around on the floor in pain and her heart was full of regret, but she decided if she could change anything about it (and she could, mind you) she would keep this situation just the same as it was.

"Uh, Maxamillion? I uhm--are dates flammable?"

Max laughed even harder. Yeah, this was definitely worth it.