Frank, you're never home" I remember my mom's words.
Well yeah, because you treat me like a piece of shit.
I roll my eyes at myself and decide I haven't seen my parents or talked to them in awhile, and decide to go home for a bit.
It's weird that I have the sudden urge to go back, and that I call it home.
I don't want to see them, but at the same time I do, because they're still my parents despite the shit they've put me through.
And really, I don't have a home, I move about from friends and hotels and sometimes even sleep on the street, but I was raised there, so I guess I can call it home.
I pull my cigarettes out of my pocket as I walk down the street, because I'm pretty sure my parents house is this way.
Twenty minutes later I arrive at the house I grew up, and I use the key in my wallet that I forgot I had.
They're not home.
My dogs come running and sliding on the wood floor, and I remember why I still call this place home.
Because of them.
The loves of my life, the reason I probably don't have a boyfriend, because I love them more than I could probably love him.
"Hi guys how are you I've missed you?!" I exclaim to the four wild dogs I grew up with.
I walk into my living room and almost jump when I see a boy around my age sitting on the bay window seat.
"Who the fuck are you?" I ask.
"Oh, um, I'm Gerard" he says shyly, looking up from his sketchbook.
"And what are you doing here?" I ask, slowly getting pissed.
"The Iero's are on vacation, and I'm dog sitting... What are you doing here?" He replies.
"I live here" I say, but then shake my head, in the 'never mind' gesture.
"Oh, Frank...They said you didn't live here anymore, and only came around once in awhile..." He mutters.
"Yeah well, when are they getting back?" I ask, and inch closer, because as we talk, I realise that he's actually gorgeous.
Rolling Stones baseball style shirt, blue jeans loosely hanging off his hips and the brightest red hair on his shoulders, and a few pieces hanging in front of his eyes as he bites his lip and thinks.
"Oh there's a note on the counter" he says.
I move to the counter and read the note that has stains of coffee cup rings
-Gerard! Thanks so much for watching the dogs again! We'll be back on the 27th, but you can call if you need anything-
So they'll be gone for another week and a half.
"Well Gerard, since they'll be gone, I'll be here for the next week and a half. I know my mom paid you already, so you can stay, just ignore me" I say, and try to be nice because he's pretty and I could use a good fuck.
"Okay. Well your dogs are fuckin cool to say the least" he says and I smirk.
"Yeah they are, thanks man" I say.
"Whatcha drawing...?" I ask.
"Your cool dogs" he says cheekily, and flips over his sketch book to show a really good drawing of my dogs, all sitting in a calm position on the couch.
"Wow they sat still for awhile huh?" I ask.
"Nah, hardly got the base sketch done before some cute dude walked in and they went ballistic" he says, a slight smirk at the end.
"Is that so" I say and smirk at his lame attempt to be blunt.
"Fuck yeah man" he says, not even peeling his eyes from the sketchbook.
I ignore the sudden urge to pin him up against a wall and fuck him senseless, and save that for another time, instead going up to my bedroom and seeing if my dad has trashed it on one of his drunken rages.
Shockingly, I find it in normal condition, except for the bed being slept on.
Of fucking course my mom would let Gerard- gorgeous and glorious to sleep on my bed, cause I don't live here anymore.
I drop my shoulder bag on the floor and plop down on my bed like old times, but it feels so alien that I have to sit up and go to my desk chair, because the scent of Gerard on my sheets and the picture in my mind of him sleeping in my... In that bed makes me not want to lay in it because it's not my bed anymore, it's his.
"Yeah miss Iero had me use this room, but I've been sleeping on the couch lately because it's closer to the tv and coffee maker and you have a smoke detector up here" Gerard suddenly says as he walks into the room.
"Yeah, kinda figured she'd been the one to tell you to sleep here, and the trick is to put this bowl over the detector whenever you need a smoke" I say and show him the bowl I used to use, with ridges cut into the ceiling so I don't have to hold it or tape it.
"Seems like something you'd do" he says and grins at the bowl covering the smoke detector.
And since it's up, I might as well have a smoke.
I light a cigarette and I feel Gerard's eyes on me but I keep my eyes on the walls around me, still decked out in band posters and cheap drawings.
"What do you mean by that?" I ask lazily as I take a long drag.
"Seems like you'd be the kid to cover the smoke detector in your room, and leave home at 17, and keep your porn between your mattress and bed box spring" he says, and grins like a maniac as he says the last.
"Mind you I haven't lived here since I was actually 15, and that porn means nothing to me now because I'm not into women" I reply, and wonder why the fuck i just told him that.
He's a fucking dog sitter for my parents, not a therapist.
"Also kind of figured that" he says with that motherfucking grin.
Where'd the shy kid go that stuttered when I first walked in.
"And how would you figure that, oh, all knowing Gerard?" I ask as snottily as possible.
"Well you've been flirting with me this whole time" he says as he gets up and walks out.
Am I that obvious or is he aware that he's hot as fuck and automatically assumes everyone wants to fuck him.
I'm alone again in the room, and I smoke two more cigarettes before I go back downstairs, because I smell coffee.
I fill my cup up as I look around and see Gerard's red as fuck hair peeking out from the window to the backyard, and he stands with his cup of coffee, just watching the dogs wrestle around in the backyard.
I drink my first cup in one go and pour myself a second as I hear Gerard come back in.
He snickers, and I use all my self control not to look up or make a face.
"You're no good at this" he says with a laugh and walks into the next room.
I lay on the living room floor as the dogs come in and I play with them, just loving my time I get to spend with these kids.
The only reason I actually miss this place.
"Oh, and you have a good music taste, I mean, if you still listen to the bands that are on the posters in your room" Gerard says, coming back into the room with a sketchbook and a fresh cup of coffee.
"Yeah I still do, thanks" I say and he lightly nods.
He plops on the couch and begins to draw, probably finishing the drawing of the dogs.
"So who's your favourite?" He asks and gestures towards the dogs.
"Honestly can't pick, they're like my children, or my brothers and sisters, cause they've all been piling up since I was like five, we got her first" I say as I point to Maya, the golden lab.
"Then him two years after" I say and point to Marx, the blue pit bull, mastiff mix.
"Then him about five years ago" I say and point to Zak, the jack terrier.
"And her three years ago, right before I left" I say and point to sweet pea, and none of us know what the fuck she is, but we love her.
"Oh wow yeah, they were your only company cause you don't have any brothers and sisters right?" He asks.
"Yeah" I simply reply.
It gets awkwardly quiet.
"So you didn't even know your parents we're going away for three weeks?" He asks.
"Nope, and they didn't particularly bother to tell me either, of course because they didn't want me to come, but I wouldn't go anywhere with them, especially somewhere vacation-like, with the beach and the sun and swim suits and margaritas and all that, not my type of... getaway" I reply, elaborating more than intended.
"Not your cup of tea" he supplies.
"Nope" I agree.
"So how old are you and what's up with your family? I mean, they let you stay at a strangers for three weeks to dog sit?"
"I'm twenty one and I don't live at my parents anymore, I know your mom cause she commissioned me to paint a mural in the dining room and I got along really well with the dogs when I would come over to paint so she called me again and asked for me to come while they were gone" he replies and I nod, cause that makes sense.
"Wow I really haven't been here in awhile, I didn't know they had a mural in the dinging room" I say and get up and go see it.
He grins and I roll my eyes as I walk to the dining room.
I'm met with the sight of a mural that I could only imagine was inspired by the stereotype of the garden of Eden or heaven.
"Well holy shit" I say and plop back down on the couch facing Gerard.
"Thanks" he says, still not looking up from his sketchbook.
"How do you know that was a compliment?" I ask.
"Because you are trying to flirt with me" he says with a grin.
"Y'know, or maybe I just like art" I say, trying to be nonchalant but totally coming off sarcastic and angry.
This kid knows he's getting under my skin.
"You seem like someone to appreciate art, but your mind isn't set on the art right now" he says and looks up at me.
"Do do this to everyone you just meet?" I ask, and stand up.
"Do what?" He asks, biting back a smirk.
"Act like you know them and read them like a book" I supply.
"No, just the cute ones" he says and I grumble.
"It smells like bull shit, I mean, dog shit in here, you should probably go clean that up, dog sitter boy" I say as rudely as possible.
He rolls his eyes and shoulder checks me as he walks by and mutters something I can't decipher.
When he comes back I'm watching some shit on the tv, but not really watching it.
"671 has good music videos" he mentions, and I roll my eyes at him before changing the channel to 671.
As he said, 671 does have good music videos.
Nirvana, pearl jam, black flag, and the bouncing souls videos play for the next half hour as he sketches and I sing along and keep stealing glances over at him.
"You going to make coffee again soon?" I ask.
"Yeah I'll be right on that" he mutters and keeps drawing. I roll my eyes and get up and walk to the kitchen to make it cause clearly he's not going to.
When the coffee finishes I walk to the living room and hand Gerard his cup of coffee, and I drink mine at the couch across from him.
I didn't spice it up because I noticed he also takes it black.
Zak comes up to my lap and cuddles with me as I half watch the tv half watch Gerard, and I smile at him falling asleep in my lap.
Sweet pea comes walking in, slowly and shyly, and walks past me to get to Gerard.
"Traitor" I mutter as she plops down in his lap.
"Ah so she's your favourite" he grins and I roll my eyes.
He ruffles around in his pencils bag for awhile and pulls out a few brushes, and to my surprise he sticks the brushes in his coffee.
"Did you just..."
He rolls his eyes and uses one of the brushes to paint on the picture.
Then, he takes a sip out of the cup.
"Okay what" I state.
"Calm down, kid" he says.
"Im not a kid, I'm fuckin three years younger okay" I defend.
"You're pretty short though" he counters.
"Fuck off Gerard, go suck a dick" I snap, and don't intentionally mean.
"I'd suck your dick" he says, and for the first time, looks up from his sketchbook.
"New found confidence since the boy that was stuttering when I first walked in huh?" I say as I cross the room and get in front of him.
"You can only imagine" he grins.
"You are the stupidest..." And before I can finish my sentence Gerard is off his seat and kissing my lips hard.
He makes a deep noise in his throat and puts both hands through my hair.
"You called me Dog Sitter Boy" he teases and grips my ass.
"Yeah and that's what you're here to do" I say and push him against the wall.
"Good thing you're not a dog then" he says and starts to give me a hickey on the neck.
"The fucks that suppose to mea.." I ask, but can't finish before he's palming me through my jeans.
Yeah, I'd love to fuck him right now, but that would make it too easy for him and it'd make me look bad.
So, I pull away and walk to the front door.
"Bye dog sitter boy" I say and walk out the front door and slam it shut.
I grab a cigarette and chain smoke all the way to my friend Mikey's house and climb through his window to get to his room.
He's not home but I know he won't mind me being here.
I sit on his floor for awhile thinking about the events that have just occurred, and notice I still have a slight hard on in my pants and know that I have to take care of it.
I jerk off thinking of the art boy back at my parents house, still with my dogs, sleeping in my old room on my old bed.
The next day I go back to my parents, and the door is locked again so I fish out the key from my pocket and unlock the door.
I expect the dogs to run and come see me, but none of them do.
I look around and notice not even dog sitter boy is here, and wonder where the fuck he took my children to.
I sigh and realise there's nothing I can do, so I just make coffee in hopes that fucker will return with my babies and maybe let me tease him more, because we all know how amusing it is.
"Okay what the fuck are you doing back here" he states as he collides through the back door; being pulled by all four dogs and tangled leashes.
"I sort of live here" I state.
"Good point" he says and starts to unhook the dogs from their leashes.
Sweet pea rushes over to me and I bend down and pick her up and say small things to her as she snuggles up to my chest.
"Oh good you made coffee" Gerard says and starts to come to the counter.
"None for you" I say with a smirk.
"So who ya gonna share it with, the damn dogs?" He asks in frustration.
"I just might... Would you like some coffee sweat pea?" I say and put my cup dangerously close to her face as Gerard cringes.
As a kid I would let these dogs lick my suckers and take sips out of my cups and that sounds awfully fucked up now that I think about it but apparently dogs mouths are cleaner than ours or maybe I was just naïve enough to believe it and proceed to share saliva with my dogs.
You get really bored as an only child...
"Don't be a fucking ass and hog all the god damn coffee" Gerard groans.
"Dog sitter boy has quite the mouth, huh?" I retort.
"You bet I do" he says and licks his lips, suddenly tilting the atmosphere of the room.
I take the coffee pot and drain the rest into my own cup and Gerard glares at me the whole time.
"Now I have to make a new pot" he states.
"Yeah, you do" I say with a smirk and walk out of the room with my dog still in my arm.
"Okay sweet pea wanna watch a film?" I say to her as I set her down on the couch and look around for the remote.
I hear a groan from behind me, and my cheeks flush and I stand up, realising how far my ass was in the air when I was looking for the remote.
"No it's fine, you can keep looking for the remote, I almost like that side of you better than this one" Gerard says and points to my face smugly.
"Fuck off" I say and he scoffs.
I bend back down to look for the remote and Gerard comes to sit down on the couch with his art supplies.
As soon as he sits down I quickly stand up and fall into his lap and pull his chin down for a long kiss.
"Weren't you just telling me to fuck off?" He asks, sliding a pencil behind his ear.
"Yeah, fuck off, art boy" I spit.
"Don't you mean 'fuck me?'" He says with a smirk.
"Say that again?" I ask as I squint at him and his gorgeous face.
"Fuck me" he whispers and I shiver.
I pull him back into a kiss and he runs his hands through my hair as I pull the pencil from behind his ear and throw it across the room and flip us around so I'm straddling him.
"That was a good pencil" he says dryly.
"Too bad art boy. It bugged me because it's a reminder of how pretentious you are" I say and run my hands under his shirt.
He palms me through my jeans as I put little love bites behind his ear and down his neck and shoulder.
"You planning on getting me hard and then walking out like you did yesterday?" He asks and stops palming me.
"Don't plan on it" I reply and keep making more purple marks down his shoulder.
"Good" he says and flips me up and grabs my wrist and starts to pull me out of the living room.
I follow him upstairs, the dogs trailing not too far behind and then shut the door to my old room as we get in so the dogs don't come in.
"Lay down" he says and gestures to the bed.
I do as he says, just to humour him for a bit, because everyone knows Frank Iero never really does what he's told.
"It smells like you" I say.
"That's the point, you're laying there so it'll smell like you again" he says and I roll my eyes.
"You know you've known me longer than you think you have" he says.
"How so?" I ask and slowly pull his shirt off.
"Mikeyway is my little brother" he says, and I pause as every single moment I've been to Mikey's house flashes before my eyes and I'm dumbfounded with the realisation.
"God damn it you're Mikey's big brother" I say in realisation, playing over all the times I've seen him run out of the house while me and mikes play video games or the family dinners I attended that Gerard's hair was covering his face or the times when he'd come in and pick on Mikey for five minutes and then disappear, and I remember always, always having heart eyes for this motherfucker.
"Yeah that's basically what I just said" he says and unbuttons my pants.
"Do you remember the time I tried talking to you because you had a misfits shirt on and I wanted to compliment you?" I ask with a laugh.
"You were like 13, and yeah I remember because you were so shy and adorable... Who corrupted you to be this cocky, arrogant, tease?" He says.
"The idea of you and my fist" I say with a smirk.
"But apparently nobody has been recognising me because my face and hips lost weight and my hair is red" he says and I nod.
"Okay enough reminiscing, can you just fuck me" I say bluntly and he grins.
"No problem" he says, and wastes no time sliding my skinnies off and palming me through my briefs.
I suck on his collar bone in hopes to give him a bright purple mark, reminding me of the purple watercolour art paints I've seen him using downstairs.
"That, it's so good" he says as he brushes his thumb over the love bite I left and stares at it in the mirror across the room.
"It's beautiful" he says in marvel.
"Please. Please cover me in these" he says breathlessly.
"Really?" I ask.
"Yes fuck please" he says and stares me right in the eyes.
I crash my lips with his and kiss him hard, and slowly make my way down his jaw and neck and across his shoulders and leave dozens of hickeys.
"I love these, I've loved these for so long" he says fondly and ghosts his fingers over his skin with splayed purple marks.
"They're beautiful with your skin" I say and kiss from his waistline to his jaw.
"Your tattoos make you beautiful" he says and points to the few on my arms.
"Why don't you get some since you love art so much?" I ask.
"I can't stand needles. That's why I like these so much" he says and points to the love bites.
"Because no needles were involved and it stays in the skin for awhile, and it's the body's natural way of making you a work of art" he says.
"Told you you were pretentious" I say with a smirk and he rolls his eyes.
"Please just fuck me already" he says and lays back.
I slide off my boxers and he slides off his and opens his legs.
I lean over to the nightstand and grab a box of condoms that may or may not be three years old.
"Here" I say and toss him lube.
"You do it" I say and he takes the cap off and puts it on his fingers slowly.
I watch with one hand firmly on my dick as he uses two fingers to lube himself.
"Okay. Okay" I say breathlessly as my hard on starts to hurt too much and I just need to be inside of him.
He spreads his legs wider and I position myself, and sigh in relief as I first slide in and receive a deep growl from Gerard.
I watch him the whole time as I quicken my thrusts and he looks so, so beautiful.
Skin white and littered with purple marks, lips pink, eyes light brown but squeezed shut and crease between his brows while he pants and groans.
"Please Frank" he says and we lock eyes.
I lean down and kiss him hard before getting back up and thrusting into him as hard as I can. He holds himself as he moans and I realise then that before, when I first walked in and saw how attractive he was, that I just wanted a good fuck, but after he told me how I've known him forever and how I'm living my teenage fantasy, and that he's my best friends brother, this isn't just a good fuck, it means something because he is important to me.
"Fuck, Gee" I say and when he looks at me through his long eyelashes and let's out a long satisfying moan I feel tightness in my stomach and then come into the condom.
He comes seconds later all over his chest, and I fall on the bed next to him and toss the condom in the bin and then pull him in for a long, hard kiss.
"You were so good" he says.
"You are so beautiful" I say and run my fingers through his hair.
"This doesn't end here right?" He asks outright.
"Of course not, not if you don't want it to" I say and lean on one elbow.
"I don't want it to" he says.
"Me too" I agree.
"That, it just felt right. It wasn't a simple fuck it was better than anything I've had and you can't tell me you didn't feel that?" He says in awe.
"No, no, I get it, I know what you're saying, I thought when I first saw you, I just wanted to fuck you senseless and walk away, and not care when I tease you and walk away, but that just, that's not it. You, you look so beautiful and that didn't mean nothing to me, it meant everything and I, wow. You're amazing, and you're not just a fuck you're so much more" I say, and stare at the ceiling.
"I've never felt that much emotion, and passion and stuff and it felt like when I draw or when I paint or watching a thunderstorm or hearing someone laugh or... I don't know I just, I feel complete" he says and puts his hand in mine.
"Be my boyfriend?" I ask.
"Yes. Yes Frank" he says and lays on my chest and kisses me.
"I hate to say this, but... Can I go paint something?" He asks.
"Of course you can. Can I draw?" I ask.
"You're getting that too, that odd sudden inspiration to create?" He asks as he gets up.
"Yeah. Let's get cleaned up" I say and take him into the bathroom across the hall.
He leans up against the counter and I grab his face and kiss him again, still amazed by how beautiful he is.
"You are so cute" he says as he grabs my chin and kisses me again.
"And you've got come on you" I say and wet a rag and wipe him.
After we get cleaned up he goes downstairs in just one of my shirts from my dresser, and I throw on a fresh pair of boxers and grab my smokes and join him.
"Here" he says and hands his pencils and a paper to me.
I sit next to him, maybe a little too close, but he smiles so I know it's okay.
Our knees and elbows touch, but he hardly notices because he is so captured in his art.
"Can I draw all your hickeys?" I ask.
He nods, still focused on his art, so I start to outline him, sitting hunched over a palette of watercolours and a cup of water with various brushes.
I decide not to colour him in; just his outline, and I leave all of the palette in grayscale except for the purple that most closely resembles his bites, and then draw the bites.
The shade of purple contrasted with the grey scale and white of the paper and it ties together so perfectly.
Hating when people lean over to look at my art, I stop myself from doing the same thing to Gerard.
I get up to go make coffee and when I bring him his cup he gives me a peck on the cheek and puts a brush in his cup right away and takes a long sip.
"Almost done" he says and I nod.
When he finishes, it's tattoo ink dripping off of an arm, where there's still faint lines of where the tattoo was, but it's like the ink is melting off.
"Is this you, and what you imagine when thinking about getting a tattoo?" I ask.
"Yeah, like one will never be permanent for me, so I feel like my whole life I'll be getting things that remove, because nothing is permanent" he says and I nod.
"This is mine" I say and slide him my paper.
"Wow this is amazing, although I'm really not that beautiful" he says.
"No you're more beautiful, you can't trust my hand to try and capture your beauty" I say and lean closer to him.
"How come you don't point out that I'm also an asshole?" He asks.
"Because it doesn't bother me, but your beauty, it does" I say and pull him in for a kiss.
I hold his jaw and sit in his lap as he wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me in closer.
"Mikeyway's big brother. Wow. I can't fucking believe that" I say in awe.
"You were such a cute little 13 year old I'm so glad I got to see that and now years and years later we're dating" he says and I can feel my cheeks burning.
I was such an awkward 13 year old.
"Yeah it's unreal" I agree and grab his hand.
He laces our fingers, and sometime, we fall asleep on the couch with our fingers still together when we wake.