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A Night of Mischief

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A knock came on Don's dressing room door. He put his wig down that he was wearing for The Dancing Cavalier and went to go open it.

"Twick or tweat!" Cosmo imitated a child's voice as he held his eyelids so that his corneas showed. Don chuckled and let him in. Cosmo sat down while Don sat in his makeup chair.

"So tell me, Don...what do celebrities such as yourself do on this, the world's night of evil, havoc and terror? Ha ha ha ha ha!" Cosmo laughed evilly.

"Kathy and I were thinking of going to the Halloween dance that R.F.'s putting on."

Cosmo's smile faded. "Why?"

Don stared at him blankly. "Because we want to?"

"Come on, Don. It's Halloween. Don't you remember Halloween when we were kids? Playing tricks and stuff?"

"Yeah, but...we were kids, Cos. I got a girl now. This way I can have fun on Halloween AND be romantic!"

"Well," Cosmo stood up. "the only way I see that being worth it is if you do the nookie with Kathy."


"Come on, pal! How long have you been with this dame and she still won't put out?"

Don stood up. "You know, there's more to life than just sex!" He raised his voice.

Cosmo chuckled. "Have it your way, Donnie." He left.

"I don't even know what I'm gonna be!" Don yelled at the closed door.


Kathy walked with Lina and Zelda through the sets.

"So Kathy, what are you doing tonight?" Lina asked.

"Don asked me to go to the Halloween dance with him!"

Lina and Zelda gasped.

"That's so cute! What are you gonna wear?" Zelda asked. "Something hot?"

Kathy looked down. "I have no idea."

"Come on, Kat," Zelda said. "it's Halloween! Don's gonna be looking for nookie, and if you don't give it up tonight, you're gonna start November single."

"Except that Don's not like that. I don't know why you think he is, but he isn't."

Lina and Zelda looked at each other. "Mmmhmmm," they nodded at each other.

"Kathy, it doesn't matter that Don isn't like that," Lina said. "men are like that, and Don's a man."

"I've had enough of you guys," Kathy stormed away.


Five hours later at eight PM, Don rang Kathy's apartment doorbell dressed as Dracula. She answered in a beautiful white princess costume. complete with a tiara and a wand. She blushed when she saw how he smiled at her.

"It was last minute," she chuckled and looked down.

"I think it looks great."

"Well, thank you," Kathy put her arms around Don's neck. "are you gonna bite my neck or something?" she asked seductively.

"Maybe if I get hungry," they chuckled and kissed. They heard the bushes next to them rustle and looked towards them. Kathy cuddled closer into Don's arms, but he moved closer to the bushes.

"Hey, who's there?" he called.

Suddenly, a figure in a black cape similar to Don's Dracula cape and wearing a grotesque beige mask depicting a deformed face jumped out with arms outstretched. Kathy screamed. Don jumped back and went to go hold her. The figure stopped yelling and raised the mask to reveal their identity.

"Happy Halloweeeeeen!" Cosmo raised his eyebrows. Don and Kathy looked at him, exasperated.

"Cos, you scared the hell out of her!" Don indicated Kathy.

"Halloween 101, Donnie!" Cosmo patted Don on the arm. "Kathy, you look beautiful." He put his arm around her. Another person stepped out of the bushes. It was Lina, wearing a revealing red devil costume, horns and a pitchfork. Cosmo wolf-whistled.

"Lina," Don smiled sarcastically. "Satan. How fitting."

"Shut up, Don," Lina retorted.

"Yeah, shut up, Don!" Cosmo white knighted. He put his arm around Lina's waist and looked her up and down, smacking his lips. "Listen, baby, if you get scared tonight, just call my name and I'll keep ya safe."

Don and Kathy rolled their eyes at each other.

"Thanks, Cos, but I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself," Lina replied haughtily. Kathy stifled a giggle. "I'm meeting Zelda at the dance. You guys should come by later!" Lina left, leaving the trio in front of Kathy's doorstep. They watched her leave and then turned back to each other.

"Well, Cos, you got us," Don succumbed. "now what?"

"Well," Cosmo had a suggestive look on his face. "what is your opinion on haunted houses?"

"Oh, please," Don scoffed.

"What's this?" Cosmo walked up to Don. "Don't tell me the greatest actor in the world doesn't BELIEVE in HAUNTED HOUSES!"

"I'm too busy to believe in haunted houses. They're just silly ghost stories."

Cosmo ignored him. "Or could it! Are you SCARED??"

"I'm not scared. I'm not scared of anything."

"I don't believe it!" Cosmo ignored him again. "The greatest actor in the world is SCARED!!"

Kathy got between the two of them. "I think it could be fun," she suggested and walked ahead of them.

"Yeah, Don. Your girl thinks it could be fun!" Cosmo continued in that mock leer.

Don thought for a minute. "Fiiine."

Cosmo patted his arm again and laughed. He glanced at Kathy ahead of them and muttered, "Plus, it'll give you a good opportunity to make Kathy put out when she gets scared and leaps into your arms."

"Cos, come on," Don rolled his eyes again. "how am I gonna make her do that?"

"You're Dracula! Bite her neck or something! That usually starts it anyway." He walked ahead. Don just shook his head and followed.


The trio stood in front of an old abandoned mansion. The windows were boarded up. The entire house looked like it was about to fall apart. Kathy stared at it, but let Don gather her into his arms. Don looked at Cosmo, who was smiling mischievously. He practically ran into the house, motioning for them to follow. Don and Kathy looked at each other, shrugged and followed.

The three slowly stepped inside. The foyer was devoid of furniture, save for a few old chairs and an antique grandfather clock. A wide staircase was in front of them, covered in cobwebs. To their far right stood the dining room, a dark room where a long table stood. The entire place was covered in cobwebs, and some spiders crawled inside of them.

The trio wandered into the dining room. It started pouring rain outside. Coupled with the sound of thunder and the flash of lightning, it made for an eerie scene. Don backed up against a bureau on the left side of the room when a flash of lightning illuminated the wall. Don turned at that moment and screamed at a stuffed bear's head hanging on the wall. He stopped and closed his eyes when he realized what it was. He turned back to find Cosmo and Kathy looking at him with amused looks on their faces.

"Well, it's the weather's fault!" Don came up with an excuse. "They said it never rains in California!"

Next to the bureau, there was an entryway to the kitchen. They slowly walked through, Don first, and found a simple 1910s kitchen. There was a potbelly stove and a refrigerator. Cosmo walked ahead, banging on the stove.

"This is boring. There's no ghosts here."

"Or maybe we're just too old for Halloween," Don walked up to Cosmo. "face it, Cos. Nothing scares us anymore."

Another flash of lightning and another peal of thunder.

"Nah," Cosmo looked at Don. "there's stuff out there. After all, you're scared of stuffed bear's heads."

Kathy laughed. Don made a face.

"Come on, Don!" Kathy grabbed his hand eagerly. "let's go upstairs!"

Cosmo raised his eyebrows at Don. Don mouthed "no" at him as Kathy led him past. Cosmo smiled and pulled out a flask and took a pull of brandy.


The stairs creaked with each step that Don and Kathy took. Kathy gripped Don's hand tightly with each step they took, and when they got to the second floor, she held his arm lightly. She felt breath behind her and turned quickly and screamed when she saw that Cosmo had put on his mask again.

"Cosmo, take that dumb mask off."

Cosmo laughed at her, but complied. Upstairs housed a two bedrooms; a master and a smaller one. Each of them held as many cobwebs as the first floor and were even dustier. They peeked in the smaller bedroom. It looked like a child's room; antique toys, including a rocking horse and blocks, were on the floor. The sheets had flowers on them. It must've been a girl's room, Don concluded.

Kathy walked past Don and looked in the floor-length mirror that stood against the closet. After a few minutes, her eyes widened as she dropped her wand and screamed; the figure of a little girl had appeared behind her. She had curly light brown hair and wore a white dress that looked like it came from the late 1800s. As quickly as she appeared, she disappeared. Don ran up and embraced Kathy, who was now whimpering. Cosmo ran up, too.

"What happened, baby?" Don asked, frightened.

"I saw a girl!"


"Yes! A little girl! She was wearing a white dress!" Kathy pointed at the mirror. "She was standing right behind me! Don, I swear on my life I saw her!"

Don let go of her. His expression changed to one of frustration. "All right, I'm sick of this. The two of you. There's nothing here and I'll prove it!"

"There's only one way to do that," Cosmo said quietly, taking a sip of brandy.

"Which is?"

"Spend the night here," Cosmo said simply, screwing the cap back on his flask and tucking it back in his cape.

"What?" Kathy exclaimed, an incredulous look on her face.

"No way, Cos," Don shook his head.

"Oh?" Cosmo walked up to Don and crossed his arms. "I thought there was nothing here, bimbo?"

Don sighed. "Fine." He pointed at Cosmo. "But you're staying with us."

"I never said I was leaving. Wouldn't want Mr. Bimbo and his damsel in distress fearing for their lives and not have their best buddy here to save them."

Don and Kathy gave each other another exasperated look.


The master bedroom was dusty and smelled old. Kathy sat on the huge bed while Don looked out the window at the pouring rain. Kathy sighed.

"Don, this is my fault."

Don turned around and went to go sit next to her.

"What do you mean, babe?"

"I wanted to come here too. I just wanted to have fun on Halloween."

Don took her face in his hands.

"Babe, it's okay! Don't worry; Halloween is my least favorite holiday."

"THAT makes me feel better!"

"Hey, I'm here, right? And I'm gonna protect you, right?"

Kathy smiled and nodded.

"As long as I'm here, nothing will hurt you."

Don kissed Kathy tentatively. Kathy wrapped her arm around his neck, deepening their kiss. His tongue touched hers and they played with each other. Kathy felt safe and loved in his arms. It didn't feel like they were in a haunted house. It felt like they were in Don's house or her apartment, necking like they always did. Kathy decided to have some more Halloween fun.

"Are you gonna bite my neck, Count Dracula?" she asked, feigning an innocent damsel in distress.

"I vant to suck your blood!" Don, ever the actor, did his best Transylvanian accent as he smiled and moved down to Kathy's neck as they both giggled. Don remembered what Cosmo had said and moved his hand down to the hem of Kathy's dress and gathered it in his hands. Kathy didn't stop him. She closed her eyes, reveling in the sensations. When she opened them, they widened again and she screamed; the little girl had re-appeared, standing on the side of the bed, right behind Don.

"What? What, babe?" Don asked, startled.

"She's here! The little girl is here again!"


"Behind you!"

Don turned quickly behind him. The girl had disappeared again. He turned back to Kathy and caressed her face.

"Babe, you're seeing things..."

Kathy removed Don's hand from her face forcibly.

"No I'm not, Don."

Realizing he wasn't going to get anywhere, Don sighed and started to get off the bed. "Let's go see what Cos is doing."

The minute they got off the bed and walked back into the hallway, a door slammed. Kathy went into Don's arms again.

"Cosmo?" she called.

"Cos, stop, this isn't funny anymore," Don scolded.

"What are you talking about?" Cosmo came out of the little girl's room wearing his mask. "I didn't do anything."

There was a door at the end of the hall. It was closed. The three slowly moved towards it. They stopped in front of it. It was open slightly.

"You pull it," Cosmo nudged Don.

"I'm not pulling it. You pull it."

"Want me to pull it?" Kathy offered.

"No, I'll do it," Cosmo and Don said simultaneously.

"Let's pull it together," Don said quietly. "on 3. 1...2...3."

Cosmo lifted up his mask. All three pulled it open slowly and immediately started screaming. There on the door hung a man. Blood ran down his face. His eyes were huge and bloodshot. He was wearing tattered jeans and a ripped tartan shirt. The trio turned around and saw the little girl. Screaming, they ran downstairs. The minute they set foot on the floor, they were surrounded by shrunken heads hanging in mid-air. They ran out and crossed the street hurriedly, not looking to see if cars were coming. They stopped running when they became ensconced in thick brush, panting.

"Where do we go now?" Kathy asked, catching her breath.

"How about to the dance?" Don coughed.

Cosmo checked his pocket watch. "It's 11 o'clock, the dance is probably over." He put his hands on his knees and looked down. Beads of sweat hit the ground as he panted.

Don felt something hit his back and jumped back, turning around. Kathy and Cosmo caught him and looked up to see Lina and Zelda, dressed as a cat with painted-on whiskers, in front of them. Don caught his breath again.

"What are you guys doing here?" Lina asked.

"What are you doing here?" Kathy asked.

"We were looking for Old Man Entwistle's grave," Lina replied. "your turn."

"We went in there," Cosmo said simply, pointing back at the house. Zelda and Lina's eyes widened.

"You went in there?" Zelda said, horrified.

"Yeah. Why?"

"Everyone in Hollywood knows that place is haunted."

"He made us go in there," Kathy pointed to Cosmo.

"You wanted to go in too, Kat!"

Lina chuckled. "You guys are so stupid. Come on, people from Monumental are TP'ing!"

"THAT I can get into!" Don smiled and the three followed Lina and Zelda. The little girl watched from inside the house...