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Blue Ghosts and Blue Hedgehogs

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It is the distant year of 2018, and Sonic had finally lost all of the baby weight he had had in the 90s. His formerly round, circular stomach had been slimmed to something more sleek and aerodynamic for his speed so he is even faster now than he was before. All of his weight had been lost in time and space since the New Hampshire Infant Fire Crisis of 2017.

It was an ordinary Wednesday morning when they arrived. Them.
Sonic was on his way to school which started at exactly 8:00AM. Sonic hated how early school started, but he always had time to sleep in a little bit simply because he is so fast that he can run all the way to school in 1 minute and 2 seconds (Tails had timed it before so this is how he knew). This meant that he could start walking to school at 7:58 and 58 seconds, which was pretty impressive, if you asked Tails, especially since Sonic and Tails lived 30 miles away from the school.

It was exactly 7:59 and 34 seconds when Sonic was about to cross the state border between South Dakota and Utah when he saw the sun descend from the sky and take on an ethereal corporeal form and touch down to the ground. Sonic was in awe. He saw the most gorgeous, the most perfect, the most round and spherical deity stand before him. The figure was still for a moment before preforming some bizarre bodily contortion that allowed it to open its too-big-to-be-purely-functional mouth. And how could any creature require such a large mouth? It had to be cosmetic, but when Sonic looked over the golden orb that stood before him, he saw only natural perfection. Sonic made a mental note to ask if the creature if it knew any good plastic surgeons because honestly he could go for a rhinoplasty, if you asked sonic and probably knuckles, the bastard.

It was then that Sonic became self-conscious about his own nose. Why was it so long? Seriously, why was it so long? Sonic then looked at the gently glowing sun once more and noticed its nose. Dear lord, that nose. Sonic's mind was racing almost as fast as him on a good day (which was saying something). Sonic reached his hand to his face to cover his ungodly nose in shame. The other entity's nose was bulbous, but it suited the yellow sphere quite well. It was long but not too long like Sonic's nose. And there were absolutely no traces of nostrils on the being whatsoever, which only stood to reason that the being did not have any nose hair, either. Sonic was flabbergasted. Who was this brilliant glowing ball that stood before him?

A sudden beeping interrupted his perverse gaze at the wonderful creature. Sonic located the source of the beeping to find that it was coming from his high tech watch which allowed him to communicate with Tails and other friends remotely. Tails' face appeared on the tiny watch's screen.

Kzzt! Sonic? It's 8:01! Are you alright? You're never late!

Sonic looked at the top of his watch to confirm that it really was 8:01 and not one of Tails' hilarious pranks that he liked to pull sometimes, that funny guy. He looked back up to catch one final glance at the mysterious incarnation of warmth and radiance, but the the sun was no longer there. Furthermore, Sonic looked up at the sky to see the REAL sun had stayed in the sky and had not, in fact, descended into a corporeal form like he thought he had seen. Confused, he looked back at his watch to reply to tails.

"Oh, heh heh, sorry about that Tails. I just got...................... distracted," Sonic said. "Be there in a flash!!!" he said before turning off his watch and returning to the task of going to school, still thinking about what he had seen that morning.

Chapter Text

As Sonic finished running to school (without breaking a sweat because that would be GROSS!!!), he thought about the mysterious entity he had seen. What was it? There was one thing that Sonic knew for sure:

It wasn't human.

And Sonic would know about humans. It was a hedgehog's job to know about humans. But that was the problem, wasn't it? It wasn't human. So what was it?

Sonic furrowed his brow in thought, stopping at a crosswalk impatiently as he let a family of unintelligent elk cross the road so he wouldn't run into them and break their bones from his super speed. Sonic had broken Knuckle's bones too many times to go through another complicated court case filed against him.

It didn't seem to be a mammal either, though. Thinking back, Sonic remembered noticing how the creature hadn't had any nostrils. Sonic knew the creature had to breathe, so he supposed it could have used its mouth. But that would have to be impractical, thought Sonic. It would surely have to constantly have an open mouth to breathe. He shuddered at the thought. Sonic hated mouth breathers. It was a gross theory, but plausible.

Sonic mentally shook himself. What did he care what the creature was? He'd certainly seen odder forms of life before. Just look at Knuckles. An "echidna." Right. Like that was even a real animal. Besides, he had only seen whatever the thing was for all of about 15 seconds. What did he even care?

As the elk finished crossing the road, Sonic focused his mind on school. What was he going to say to Tails? He was never late, and he knew that Tails knew that.

Finally, Sonic arrived at his high school, stopping in front of his best friend Tails, who looked the spiky hedgehog up and down.

"It seems like you might be losing your speed, Sonic. Thirty-four milliseconds late? I don't ever think you've been this late before," the yellow fox said smugly.

"Shut up, Tails. I just got stopped waiting for a family of elk to cross the road," he said. It wasn't completely untrue.

"I think elk can cross a road faster than 34 milliseconds, Sonic. Intellectually advanced or not," Tails quipped. "Besides, couldn't you have just gone around them and saved time? Plus, I thought you hated elk!"

Sonic paused to think about this for a moment. It was true, Sonic had had a long standing blood rivalry with elk his entire life. He had been born into the feud, but he had been quick to form his own opinions about elk, and he quickly had found out he hated them on his own terms, blood rivalry or not. But he had been so lost in his own thoughts about what he had seen that morning that he had dropped all preconceived notions and biases he had about elk (and there were a LOT). He had let them pass, had avoided breaking their bones.

"Yeah, but they were walking on really hot pavement and I wanted to see them suffer," Sonic said quickly.

Tails pondered that for a moment. "But when i called you on your watch, you were at the South Dakota - Utah border, and that was only a few minutes ago. The pavement there wouldn't have been hot at all, Sonic," he said accusingly.

"What? How did you know where I was?!" the hedgehog asked, slightly flustered.

"Duh, you left your GPS on you watch turned on," the fox replied back smoothly.

"...Oh." Sonic quickly turned it off. "Damn, I hate how that drains my battery so quickly. Do you have a backup charger I could use?" he asked. Sonic didn't want his watch to die before he had to go home that day because he used it to get home, even though he had a perfect sense of direction.

"I might.... if you tell me why you really late today," Tails said, his eyes half lidded with the satisfaction that he had Sonic in a real, heavy duty pickle this time.

Sonic crossed his arms and stared daggers at Tails, but before he could say anything, a loud siren began to sound.

ALL STUDENTS TO THE CAFETERIA! A booming voice declared as a SWAT team dropped down to circle the entire perimeter of the school. THIS IS NOT A DRILL, I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL! ANY STUDENT FOUND LOITERING WILL BE EXPELLED AND SENTENCED TO PUBLIC STONING!

Strong, flashing light accompanied the piercing sirens. A few students who hadn't yet shielded their eyes were seizing up, twitching and frothing at the mouth.

"Time to get to class!" Sonic said, relieved as he ditched Tails at the front of the school. As he entered homeroom, he desperately hoped that his friend would let the subject drop. But only time would tell.