Work Header

It's a Schlong Story

Work Text:

Derek noticed something was different about himself when he was fifteen years old. Realistically, he always knew he was good looking. He wasn’t being cocky or arrogant or anything, he just knew he was. He didn’t miss the way eyes wandered over to him at school, and how he seemed to become an overnight sensation once the last drop of awkward pubescence was washed off of him. Not cocky, just realistic.

Derek Hale was a good looking kid, with a decent enough personality, and new abdominals peeking out like the sun over a murky, adolescent horizon. Derek Hale had girls hanging off him and friends on the football team who invited him to parties. Derek Hale had a big dick.

The last bit was a relatively new discover in his young life. He was in his bedroom with Francine, an older girl from the town next to his, when he’d first made the revelation. He’d seen Francine first at his school’s Saturday football game. Their teams were playing each other, big rivals that accumulated crowds screaming in the stands. Derek was one of the idiots with his shirt off, a letter painted on, and a mild case of hypothermia.

They lost the game, it was close and his voice was hoarse from yelling out chants and taking shots from his buddy’s flask.

Francine walked up to him after the game, black hair straight and swept behind her bare shoulders, looking everything like a porcelain doll and a centerfold. When she’d asked him if he wanted to come over to her house for a small get-together Derek didn’t need to be asked twice.

He didn’t make it passed one hit on a bong before he had her hiked up on her kitchen counter, hands rustling cabinets and family pictures as he sucked her tit, fingers working up her skirt. Cops ended up busting their (not-so) small get-together soon after, and she shooed him out the back door with her number and a whisper in his ear.

“Don’t worry, I’ll return the favor.”

She texted him the next day asking for his address and told him, no argument, that in two days she would, unquestionably, rock his world.

It wasn’t the first time Derek had ever hooked up with random girls, hell, he was only a freshman for four months before he went to his first party and ended up fingering his neighbor Paige in the bathroom. It was, however, the first time it seemed like he was going to get some action in return. And he was scared as hell. He didn’t know jack shit about actually having sex. Nothing that didn’t extend beyond his dad’s old playboys and tapes he’d stolen from the blacked out section of his video store. He wasn’t planning on spanking Francine, or become her teacher anytime soon, so that didn’t seem to help anyway.

For two days, Derek was a wreck. He was a know-nothing virgin, and he couldn’t talk to his friends in school about it without getting ragged on for the rest of his young life. Like, what if his dick smelled, or he got the angle all wrong and she told everyone at her school what a freak he was, and that’s it, next thing he knows they’re chanting he’s a shit lay at the next game. Francine was older, senior to Derek’s sophomore, what the fuck did he know?

Turned out, he didn’t need to know that much.

Derek opened the door at 5 that Monday evening. He managed to bribe his younger sister out of the house for a few hours, and his parents were out for the week visiting his father’s family. Francine had draped herself on the door frame when he reached her.

“Hey” he said as calm as he could manage.

She smiled, grinning wide and slow, like a predator sensing his fear, “Hey, where’s your bedroom?”

Derek choked on his spit, “Upstairs, um, third door on your left.”

She shouldered past him with purpose, swaying into his house breezily and going up the stairs. When she noticed he wasn’t following behind her, she turned, raising an eyebrow at him, “Coming?”

‘I just might be’ he thought deliriously.

He shook himself, returning her heated grin, before taking the steps two at a time, slapping her ass as he passed her and pulled her to his room. Once inside they molded themselves to each other. Though he was younger, Derek towered over her petite frame, height massive for his age. He tilted her head back and licked into her mouth.

“Mmmph, bed” she mumbled in between kisses, “bed,”

Derek let her push him back onto his bed and crawl on top of him, legs caging him in around his hips. She ground her ass down on him, taking Derek’s hands and putting them around her waist. Derek felt himself get aroused quickly, he was fifteen and had friction on his dick, his patience was weaning fast. Finally, finally, after a few minutes Francine leaned back up, smiling down at him, and took her shirt off throwing it to the side, quickly unlatching her bra after.

She leaned down close biting his ear before whispering, “I want you naked,”

“Fuck,” Derek groaned, hastily pushing her off him and standing up to rip off his shirt. He fumbled with his belt before he shoved down his pants, taking his socks off too, because no way was he going to be that idiot that kept his socks on when he fucked.

He threw his clothes to the side and rose to his full height to see Francine standing there not moving. She was staring at him. No, she was staring at his cock.

“Um, Francine?” he asked, feeling awkward.

She opened and closed her mouth, looking back up to his face. “How old are you?”

“Fifteen, but what does that-“

“You have the biggest dick I’ve ever seen in my life.”

It was the first time Derek had ever heard this. He looked down to his penis, surprised. He never really thought about it, all the guys in the porn he watched all looked about his size, and he kept a strict hold on his eyes in the bathroom and locker rooms at school, so he didn’t have much to compare to. He never wanted to take out a ruler and measure it, it was never something he thought he’s think about. Looking at it then, his dick was completely hard; standing up fully, tan with a vein pulsing under the surface near the underside. The head swelled wide around his shaft, peeking like a mushroom and turning a lighter pink.

He looked back up at Francine, “Really?” he asked incredulously.

Francine huffed out a disbelieving laugh before nodding. She bit her lip, “Yeah. Now get over here.”

Derek lost his virginity that day, Francine bouncing on top of him, moaning a steady stream of praises all centered around his recent discovery.

It was the first time someone told Derek he had a big dick, but it certainty wasn’t the last.


Derek was in his third year of college at UCal when his dick made another big impact on his life, and that sure was a sentence that he thought would never be uttered in his life. His father lost his job that year, the economy’s recession hitting his family worse than most people.

His mother still worked, hard too, but there was nothing any of them could do, leaving his mother to call him one morning in tears, telling him they didn’t know if they could keep paying his tuition.

“I’m so, so sorry,” his mother had cried to him on the phone. Derek was sitting in his dorm, slumped over. His head hung between his shoulder and he ran a stressed hang through his hair.

“Mom, it’s okay,” he said softly. He hated hearing her cry, and frankly, it just made him that much more depressed about the whole situation.

“No, it’s not,” she bemoaned, sniffling on the other line, “we’re going to keep trying everything we can, and- and worst come to worse me and your father will refinance the house.”

“No, mom you know I can’t let you guys do that,”

“Derek, honey,” his mother cut him off, voice slightly stronger than moments ago, “your father and I made a promise to ourselves that we would send all of our kids to college. We are going to do that, we are going to figure something out.”

He hung up with his mom soon after, listening to her assure him that even though they didn’t know now how they would pay his bills, it would be taken care of.

And Derek knew he couldn’t let them do that. His parents would easily sell the house, and anything else of theirs. Hell, Derek was sure they’d sell all the clothes off their backs if it meant paying for Derek, but he wasn’t going to let them ruin their lives. He was going to figure something out.

“I can do this,” he mumbled to himself.

“I can’t fucking do this,” he said aloud, hours later in his fraternity’s house. He was sitting sunk in the couch with his third bottle of beer in his hand, exhausted from hours of begging people for jobs across campus. Two of his friends sat across from him, nodding sympathetically.

“I don’t know what to do. I looked for jobs in town today too, and they don’t pay enough. I need ten grand by the end of the semester if I want to come back, and everything here is fucking, part time or low pay,” Derek took another gulp from his bottle, “there’s no way I can pay it, and I can’t let my folks fuck up their lives, and my sister’s, just so I can go here.”

“There’s really nothing out there? You can’t like, get two jobs or something?” asked his frat brother Arthur sympathetically.

“No, there’s no way I could handle two jobs, all my classes, and then still have time to sleep and eat. Plus, two low-paying jobs does not equal ten G’s in five months.”

“What about a fundraiser?” Dave, his other brother, asked, “We do those all the time, we could do a few, make you that much money easy! You know all you have to do is take your shirt off and chicks will be begging you to take money from them!”

“That might be true, but that’s only when it’s for a charity. Taking off our shirts works for hungry kids in Africa, not a kid whose family moved from upper class to middle class,” Derek sighed, rubbing the condensation from the outside of his bottle on the couch.

The three of them sat for minutes, quietly sipping beer and trying, with no luck, to think of another solution.

Finally Derek sat up, “Guys, bottom line is there’s no way I can make this happen. I can’t come up with that type of cash that quick, it’s just impossible.”

“What’s impossible?” the three looked up as one of the senior frat brothers, Ken, walked in the front door. Looking at the scene before him he raised his eyebrows, “Yo, why do you guys look like someone pissed in your cereal?”

Dave leaned back in the armchair, “Derek’s tuition didn’t kick in for next semester; we’re trying to think of how he can make a ton of cash super fast.”

“And failing, miserably,” Derek added.

Ken nodded, looking thoughtful for a second before making eye contact with Derek, “You could always do porn.”

“Huh,” Derek eloquently replied.

“Yeah, yeah, you could do X-rated films!” Ken snapped him fingers, joining Derek on the couch, “I got a buddy who produces for this studio down town, pretty low-key productions, but works with some big names. The really good people make a thousand bucks a film, easy.”

“A thousand dollars?” asked Arthur, incredulously, “Really?”

“Yeah, they make tons of tapes and DVDs and they go all over the country. My guy says porn is a growing industry; he makes a killing just producing that shit!”

Derek opened and closed his mouth, not believing what he was hearing. Porn? He’d never thought about it before.

“Well, fuck, why didn’t you mention this earlier, I want in! Getting paid that much to fuck? That’s my fucking dream job,” laughed Dave.

Ken scoffed, grabbing Derek’s beer and taking a swig, “Because, asshat, not just anyone can do porn. My guy is a respected, working man. He’s not going to just take any schmuck off the street.”

“So why are you telling me about this then?!” Derek groaned, rubbing a hand over his face. He could feel a headache coming on.

“Because,” he drew out the word, like Derek was being an idiot, “he would definitely work with you.”


“Your dick man, it’s huge!” Ken pointed to his crotch, as if emphasizing his point. “Don’t act like you don’t know, people always talk about it!”

And Derek couldn’t really argue that point. After losing his virginity, Derek discovered another thing about himself. He really, really liked sex. And, turned out he was pretty fucking good at it. He had a reputation in high school for fucking chicks left and right, from the pretty valedictorian, to the cougar at the gym he went to. Every girl wanted to see his dick in action after word about his ‘modest’ size got out.

College didn’t change much. It was a whole new ballpark for Derek, new people, bigger parties, and more chances for Derek to get naked and show people what they were missing, after joining his Fraternity, of course. It didn’t take long before people took notice to his not-so-little Derek, and Derek certainly wasn’t complaining.

“Yeah, okay, but-“ Derek trailed off, skeptical, “Porn?”

“Yeah dude, you could make a killing, and stay here next semester! What’s the problem, do you not like sex?”

“No, of course I do-“

“Are you insecure about your manhood being all exposed?”

“Well, no, I don’t care,”

“Do you, oh, I don’t know, not like money?”

“Okay, now you’re just being an idiot-“

“Then what is the problem?” Ken exclaimed, leaning back. All three guys were looking at Derek expectantly.

What was the problem? Derek looked at his hands. He really like having sex, and getting paid for it? It was kind of perfect. He could make the cash he needed quick, and then some. He wouldn’t have to worry about paying for school, or decline going out to the bars because he didn’t have any money on him. He would get paid to have hot people play with his junk. Really, Derek thought nodding, what was the problem?

“No problem,” Derek said firmly, looking back up at his friends. “No problem, that sounds fucking sweet. I’ll do it, what’s this guys number?”


The guy loved Derek. After calling him, Derek made an appointment to meet him and a few of the company’s execs in an apartment downtown to ‘audition’. The whole thing sounded really sketchy, but Derek was desperate and needed money, so he hauled his ass to the bus station Sunday morning and went downtown with a resume he didn’t know if he’d need in his hands.

Ken’s friends name was Jerry, he was an older man in his early thirties who was tall and thin, with a grin that made Derek feel kind of uncomfortable. He greeted Derek at the front doors to his building and shook his hand.

“Good, nice to meet you Derek. You’ve got a good build, nice arms, good face.” He smiled wide at him.

Derek nodded unsure what to do, and the guy was still shaking his hand even though he stopped talking, it was really fucking weird.

“My name’s Jerry Moon,” he said, finally dropping Derek’s hand and motioning for him to follow. They walked into the building and to an elevator.

“Now, Ken was telling me about you, said you needed money,”

“Um, yeah,” Derek said, scratching the back of his head.

“Well, I like you from what I see so far, so you’re in good shape. And if what Ken tells me about you lives up to the real thing,” he looked meaningfully at Derek’s crotch, “then you won’t need to worry about money for a long time, trust me.”

Jerry led Derek up the elevator, getting out at the tenth floor. They walked down the hall, through an apartment door at the end. Inside, the apartment was a mostly empty, wooden floor, clean and bare. It was a studio apartment, with open passageways leading to a small kitchen and a room with floor-to-ceiling windows illuminating one mattress lying on the floor and a small bedside table. In the center of the apartment stood two men, both in dress pants and shirts. One appeared to be Jerry’s age, and the other, an older man in his forties, tapped his foot, looking annoyed.

Jerry closed the door behind them and walked up to join the two men, leaving Derek standing awkwardly as the three each regarded him.

“What’s your name, son?” asked the oldest man.

“I’m Derek Hale, sir.”

“Alright Derek, this is Mr. Parker and Mr. Greller,” said Jerry as the two men smiled, “they’re gonna see if you’re what they’re looking for for their company Naked Love, I’m sure you’re familiar.”

Derek was very much familiar. He was a young guy, he watched a lot of porn, and Naked Love was one of the only and biggest studios at the time, having big name stars like Tommy Hammer and Gina Maxxx and Ben Dover.

“Derek we’re gonna need you to take off your clothes, so they can see if you’re Naked Love material” Jerry told him after another moment.

Derek nodded, taking his time with his belt. He felt incredibly awkward. Not about being naked, no Derek was very comfortable with his body. The years had been good to Derek, and he wasn’t so naïve as to think he had anything to be ashamed of. It was more so the blatant stares of business looking types as he pulled down his pants. He just hoped it didn’t make his dick shrivel up inside him when he needed it most.

Once naked, Derek kicked his clothes to side and stood to his full height.

The men nodded and looking at him thoughtfully, circling around him like he was an exhibit. It would have been really funny if it wasn’t so fucking weird.

“Like I told you guys, he’s got a good body. My girlfriend’s little brother was telling me all about him.” Jerry was saying.

“His dick is pretty big, viewers will definitely like that.” Nodded his partner.

“Good looking too, we can afford to do full body shots.”

The next ten minutes were weird, to say the least. Derek was basically interviewed, buck naked as the day he was born, asked all sorts of questions.

What condom size did he wear? (“Large, usually. Extra large, depending on the brand.”)

How long did he last? (“Twenty minutes?”)

Anything he won’t do? (“I don’t like pissing on people, sir.)

After a while, Mr. Parker turned to Jerry. “He’s a good find Jerry. I like him so far,”

Jerry clapped his hands together, “Perfect! Okay Derek go ahead and put your clothes back on.”

Derek quickly redressed and waited quietly while they spoke privately to each other. After a minute they turned, the man Jerry’s age reaching his hand out for Derek to shake.

“Alright, Derek, now this is a lot quicker than we usually do things, but we think you might be perfect for Naked Love. The company is fair, and safe, so you don’t need to worry about being cheated or hurt while you work for us. We are going to set you up with a few trial runs these next few weeks, easy stuff, jerking off for the camera, or getting blown, test the waters a little, see if you’re right for the job, and if after that you’re still interested, well, we’d love to have you on board.”

Derek shook his hand enthusiastically, smiling for the first time that day, “So, I mean, does this mean I got it? I’m hired?”

“Not quite yet, you may look good, but there are a lot of good looking people out there. We need to see if you can work. You know, play it up for the camera, make people feel hot when they’re sitting in their rooms watching online. The next few weeks, think of yourself as an intern, you’re gonna be paid an adjusted rate, since you’re new, and if you do well enough, then we’ll draw up contracts. Do all the legal work, make you an official employee. For now, just be available, you’ll be hearing from us soon.” The man looked at his watch then, the older one already walking to the door.

“We really need to be going,” he huffed.

“Right, right, okay Jerry we’re off, “ the two walked to the door, but before they left Mr. Parker turned, ignoring his partners huffing, “Now, Derek, before we go I got to ask, would you be willing to go gay for pay?”

“What?” Derek asked, confused. What did that mean? Gay for-

The oldest man sighed impatiently, “Would you mind fucking men, son?”


“Oh!” he coughed awkwardly, “Yeah, no. Um, no sir I wouldn’t. Mind, that is. I wouldn’t mind,” he finished lamely.

And the truth was Derek wouldn’t. It was soon after entering college, Derek found he was an equal opportunist kind of guy. Dudes turned him on as much as chicks did, he just like good looking people with smooth skin and nice asses, he wasn’t much picky on gender. He didn’t know how much he’d be ragged on by his fellow frat brothers, so he usually stuck to girls when they were near, but that didn’t mean fucking a guy didn’t get Derek going either.

“Perfect! Kid, you might be exactly the man we want working for us,” with that and a wink, the two left the apartment.

One week later, Derek was back there, in front of three guys and a camera, jerking into his hand. The next day, he was mailed three hundred dollars in cash with a note that said the video was posted online, and people loved it.

Derek was hired officially the next week and the day he found out he jerked onto some moaning girls face while the camera men got close ups. The next week he fucked three different people, including one dude. When he told his mom he could pay the tuition himself, he told her it was because he found a good job bartending and would do that for the next few months to pay his bills before quitting.

Derek Hale quit porn when he was twenty-seven, seven years later.


One Year Since King Hale Stepped Down From His Throne, Fans Still Hopeful For His Return.

Derek rubbed his temples, slamming his laptop shut, causing a few people in the library to look over at him. He smiled apologetically at them until they looked away. It seemed like no matter what he did to distance himself from that world, it always was close behind him. With a bb gun. Shooting him in the nuts.

A year ago Derek walked away from the studio he had been working with since college, away from the money, the parties, the people, all of it. But it kept coming back to him.

Derek wasn’t ashamed of his past, not at all, he loved his job when he was working there. It was great money for doing what he loved, he paid his way through school on that job, he got apartments and food and clothes and gifts for his family all on the salary he got just by fucking people. It might not have been his first choice, at the time, but he stood by it being the one of the best decisions he made in his life.

That didn’t mean he didn’t want to move on from only being known as Big Dick Derek.

He was twenty-eight for God’s sake, he was a grown man, not a teenager joking with his friends anymore, or the butt of a joke. His friends all had careers and reputations, getting houses and kids. Fuck, he’d gone to Erica and Boyd’s wedding months before! Everyone around him was growing up, it seemed, except for him.

He was still getting stared at in the gym’s locker room.

Derek looked at his watch gloomily. He didn’t have to get to work for another hour, and he sure wasn’t going to spend it on his computer, unable to stop himself from checking him email to see if his old studio had emailed him any more threads. He couldn’t think of what to do but all he knew was he needed a burger. Or fries. Something greasy.

Grabbing his computer and stuffing it into his bag, he got up and walked out the large swinging doors. He started down the street, looking at the various storefronts. After ten minutes of walking, and seeing no burger place for fifteen blocks, Derek gave up on his dreams of a greasy burger before work.

He squinted at a store across the street, walls painted a vivid turquoise, starkly different from the tan bricked building surrounding it.

Hand painted on a hanging sign out front, The Parlor, is made from loopey, scripted letters. Under, slightly smaller read, Best Ice Cream in Brooklyn!

No one appeared to be in the shop from the looks of it. Derek crossed the street swiftly, his mind already on board with the new plan.

The bell above the door chimed when Derek entered, but the shop remained empty even as he walked up to the counter.

“Hello?” Derek called, peeking past the counter to a door in the back. No one came to greet him. “Hey, paying customer here? Hello?” No one came to see him.

Great, just fucking perfect. Could anything go right today? Derek shook his head, banging his hand angrily on the small bell in the center of the counter.

Suddenly there was a loud bang from a space beyond the door behind the counter, causing Derek to jump in surprise, looking back to see a tan young man stumble in through the frame. He gripped a bat, and had it risen threateningly.

“Wh-“ a guy looked up frantically, before settling his eyes on Derek. “Who are you?”

Derek opened and closed his mouth, so fucking confused, “I’m a customer?”

“You’re a- customer?” the guy said, standing up and letting the bat lower. Then, narrowing his eyes, “I’ve never seen you before.”

“Okay? What the fuck does that have to do-“ Derek shook his head, because apparently it was just that kind of day. “You know what, forget it. I’m leaving anyway, but fair warning I saw a family behind me on the street, who looked even more dangerous than me so you might want to keep that bat ready.” He said dryly turning to the door, “Watch out, it looked like they had young children.”

“No, wait!” another crash- “Wait, wait I’m sorry man, no don’t leave, really.”

The guy put the bat down behind the counter and hurried to where Derek had stopped. Up close Derek noted the man’s crooked jaw and muscular frame.

“I’m sorry. We kind of only have regulars of the neighborhood, no one just stops in that we haven’t seen before.”

“And to insure that you go after all your new ones with a bat.”

“Hey,” he huffed, indignantly. “We’re in the middle of Green Point, this isn’t really the pinnacle of safety. We’ve been robbed before; I was being pre-cautious. And anyway, we get shipments in every two weeks, everyone that comes here knows today we don’t have ice cream.”

Derek opened his mouth to respond when the back door banged again.

“Scott, some fucking help would be nice,” called the new blond that entered. He was tall and good looking, with a mop of blond curls above a chiseled face. He eyed Derek suspiciously, “Whose this guy?”

The guy, Scott, turned back to the blond, “This is a customer!”

“I’ve never seen him before,” the blond narrowed his eyes at Derek.

Scott smiled wide then, “That’s because this is the year's first new customer. Been a while since we had one of those!”

The back door banged a third time and Derek repressed the urge to sigh, seriously how many people were back there? A young brunette man walked in, tripped in the room, really, dressed in a jeans and Spiderman shirt, with a small white paper hat, with red strips on it.

“What’s the hold up guys- Wait, is that- That is!” the guy grinned, bouncing a little on his feet before rushing over to where the three of them stood. He grabbed one of Derek’s hands with the two of his and rapidly shook it, “New customer! I can’t believe it! Hi, welcome to The Parlor!”

Derek let his hand me rapidly shook by the man’s slightly clammy hands. Up close he noticed the man was splashed with moles, and had a wide pink mouth.

“I’m so glad to see a new face, dude, you are going to love it here, I promise, scouts honor and all that-“

“I’m not really-“ Derek started, ready to decline and remove himself from whatever circus alternate universe he entered. His hand was still being held between the guys hands.

“Come in, we will get your order right away!” the guy bulldozed, pulling his further inside.

“Stiles, with what ice cream?” the blond man asked dryly, “Did you forget the truck doesn’t get here until three?”

Stiles stopped, dropping Derek’s hand, “Oh.”

“Yeah ‘oh’” he rolled his eyes, walking past all of them to the door, “Now if you guys are almost finished I’m going to go back and try to finish inventory.”

After he left, Stiles turned back to Derek, “Okay, so turns out we won’t be able to get your order right away.”

“Really.” Derek said.

“But,” Stiles pointed his finger up at Derek, “As our newest customer, you are a priority! So tomorrow you have to come back and make sure you get something!”

“Well as much today’s experience certainly makes me eager to return, I think I’ll pass,”

“What? C’mon dude it isn’t our fault there was no ice cream!” Stiles whined.

“Actually, that seems like exactly your fault,” Derek commented, making Stiles flush. He actually looked kind of cute, standing there in the stupid hat all flustered.

“How were we supposed to know new people that don’t know our schedule were coming today?” Scott grumbled at him, Stiles nodding along with him.

Derek looked between the two of them, looking seriously at him as if what they were saying made perfect sense.

“You know what, you’re right, completely my fault,” he said sarcastically, “I’ll just get out of your hair.”

Derek turned to walk to the door only to be passed by Stiles as he rushed to the exit and plastered himself in front of it.


“Nope!” Stiles rose his chin at Derek and narrowed his eyes, “Not until you promise to come back and buy ice cream.”

“Is this how you guys run your business? Cause I’ve got to tell you, it could use some work-“

Promise me!” Stiles interrupted, still attempting to look threatening. In his paper hat. Derek was struck again by how cute he found the whole thing.

“Fine, whatever, I promise, now move.”

“That wasn’t a real promise,” Scott crossed his arms at him.

“Yeah, I agree with Scott, that sounded insincere.”

Derek pinched his nose, not believing the situation he was currently in. “You asked me to promise. I just did.”

“A real promise, you big sourface,” Stiles pushed, arms still outstretched like Derek couldn’t move him easily away from the door.

When Derek told him this, Stiles looked offended.

“If you don’t come back tomorrow we are going to report you! For- uh,” Scott trailed off.

“Grand larceny! Ha!” Stiles smiled victoriously at him.

“You don’t even know my name,” Derek pointed out, leaving the two guys floundering.

“Derek Hale.”

Derek looked behind him, seeing the blond had come back and was looking down at- Wait.

Derek felt his back pocket before looking back up at the blond in disbelief, “Is that my wallet?

The guy ignored him, “This is a really bad picture of you.”

“Give me back my wallet!”

The guy looked up at his raised voice. He stayed silent, raising an eyebrow and looking at Derek, unimpressed. “Promise.”

“What?” Derek breathed.

“My brother asked you to promise him to come back tomorrow. I’d like you to do that.”

Looking back and Stiles and Scott smilingly triumphantly at him, Derek begrudgingly accepted defeat, “I promise.” He mumbled.

“What was that?” the blond smirked.

“You heard me,” Derek grumbled, snatching his wallet from him before stuffing it in his wallet.

“Great!” Stiles grinned stepping out of the way of the door, “See you tomorrow buddy!”


“And then-“ Derek grunted, arranging photos down on his office’s table, “the guy took my wallet!”

“Sounds rough,” Boyd hummed.

They were in one of The New Yorker’s many office rooms made for editors to arrange the magazines editions. Derek and Boyd worked together, as Boyd got him the job almost a year earlier when Derek first moved to the city. Turned out, he was pretty good at it, getting steadily promoted until he was able to edit and arrange the magazine with Boyd, like he was currently doing, while venting.

“Unbelievable, I can’t believe I have to go back tomorrow,” he grunted.

“You don’t need to, you know.”

“What?” Derek looked at Boyd.

Not looking up from his work, Boyd shrugged, “You don’t need to. Sounds like they were bluffing, and it’s not like they can really hold you to it. They know your name, big deal. He stole your wallet, that’s probably worse.”

“So, what, I just, don’t go?”


“But,” Derek frowned, poking at a photo on the desk with his tweezers. “I promised.”

Boyd blew out a breath, “Then go.”

“What would you do?”

Boyd put down his tweezers, and took off his glasses. He looked at Derek. “I wouldn’t go. But I know you, you’re going to agonize over it all night before ultimately going tomorrow.”

“Am I really that predictable?” Derek sighed.

Boyd patted his shoulder, putting his glasses back on. “Afraid so. Sorry man.”


The next day found Derek taking a train down to Brooklyn at nine a.m. feeling a weird sense of déjà vu.

Boyd had been right. He tossed and turned all night, stuck between being annoyed at the whole situation, and curious about the only event in his life that strayed from routine for the first time in a long time.

Since quitting porn, his life had gotten a bit dull, to say the least. He had his friends, like Boyd and Erica, but mostly his life consisted of working, exercising, calling his family, and the occasional hook up. As weird, and slightly irritating, as the whole ordeal at the ice cream shop was, at least it was different. Something Derek hadn’t had in a long time.

Exiting the subway, Derek walked the few blocks to the store. Taking a breath he walked into the shop to see the blond at one of the few tables on his phone while Stiles stood behind the counter, in different clothes with the small paper hat askew on his head.

The bell chime caused them to look up, Stiles grinning widely.

“You came! I told you he’d come, Isaac! No one breaks a Stilinski promise!”

The blond, lowered his phone and looked to Derek uninterestedly, “Surprised to see you back here,”

“You’re not the only one,” Derek agreed, walking up to the counter.

“Welcome to The Parlor, best ice cream you’ll ever eat!” Stiles said, sticking his hand out, “I’m Stiles, owner and server! What is your name, new customer?”

“You know my name, don’t you remember, your brother stole my wallet.”

Isaac snorted from where he sat.

“Yes, but we never had a proper introduction! Today is officially the first time you’ve been here, and we like to know all of our regulars.”

Ignoring the ‘regulars’ comment, leaving that for a later time, “Derek. Derek Hale.”

He shook Stiles’ hand before turning his attention to the ice cream tubs behind the glass counter separating them. “I’ll have a small vanilla,” he settled.

Stiles furrowed his brows but grabbed a cup from behind him, “That’s it?”

Derek shrugged.

“What about sprinkles?”

“None, thanks.”

“Okaaay, how about whipped cream, or some fudge?”

“Just the ice cream,” Derek said firmly.

Stiles blew out air, but started scooping one small ball of ice cream into the cup. He held out the cup to Derek while giving him a look.

“Okay, one small vanilla cup coming right up for the man who has no fun.”

Derek told the cup and reached in his back pocket, “How much do I owe you?”

“This ones on the house,” Stiles said, looking for the first time since he’d met him, embarrassed, “I feel kind of bad about the whole forcing-you-to-come-back-by-stealing-your-wallet thing.”

Derek shrugged, going to sit down at a table.

“It’s just-“ Derek jumped as Stiles threw himself in the seat opposite him at the table, “business hasn’t been great this month. We need as many people coming as we can if we want this place to make it.”


“So sometimes we go a little crazy, but I swear we are totally professional businessmen.”

Derek couldn’t help it, he laughed a little at that.

Stiles scowled at him, “Hey, we so are! This place has been running months! We have new flavors every few weeks! That sign outside? Yeah, we painted that.”

“Wow, I’m glad to know it wasn’t a child’s handwriting like I thought.”

“I resent that my handwriting is perfect, thank you very much!” Stiles huffed.

The bell chimed again and they looked up to see two young women enter the shop.

Stiles grinned at them, “Welcome back Monica, Pheobe.” The women smiled fondly, as if used to this by now. “Isaac would be happy to serve you guys whatever your hearts desire!”

“No he wouldn’t.” Isaac said.

“Isaac,” Stiles turned around to glare at the blond, who looked, as usual, undeterred, “as your boss I order you to go man the counter.”

They stared at each other for a few seconds before Isaac wordlessly got up and went to the counter, already scooping ice cream for the girls. Derek supposed these were some of the regulars, considering they weren’t being threatened like he was.

“And Isaac put on your uniform!”

“Stiles, I’m not putting on that dumb fucking hat,” Isaac said firmly, handing one of the women a cup of ice cream.

Stiles huffed, throwing his body dramatically against the table. He looked back up at Derek, who’d been eating quietly. “Do you see what I have to deal with? No respect for the boss.”

Derek raised an eyebrow, eyes flashing up to the paper hat clipped to his hair with a bobby pin.

“Oh, shut up Mr. I-Eat-Plain-Vanilla-Ice-Cream-With-Nothing-On-It. This is classic ice cream man gear. We have clear old timey theme going on in the shop, we need to enforce the experience with proper vintage attire.” he said seriously, pointing to his hat.

“You’re wearing a plaid shirt. That’s not exactly retro.” Derek commented.

Stiles looked down at himself, “Okay,” he relented, “That’s true but in case you couldn’t tell we are not rolling in the dough here, we can’t have everything. Which is why the hat is so important!”

“I’ve only seen you wearing the hat.”

“That’s because I’m the only one who upholds the authentic vintage vibe of The Parlor,” Stiles sighed. “No one respects authority around here.”

“You’re the authority?” Derek couldn’t help but ask incredulously. Stiles glared at him again.

“Yes, I am the boss! I own this place even though my employees act like I don’t.” he added loudly looking towards Isaac who was leaning against the wall texting now that the women left. He didn’t look up.

“I’m surprised. You just look young,” Derek added when Stiles narrowed his eyes at him again.

“I am young, I’m only twenty-two, but that doesn’t mean I’m not a stellar businessman. Because I am. I’ve brought a much missed element of class to this neighborhood.” Stiles boasted.

“Class in Green Point?”

“Ya’know, we can’t all be muscled models living in Manhattan who only visit Brooklyn to see what it’s like living in the 99%.” Stiles fired back and- Wait, model?

“I don’t live in Manhattan,” Derek said instead, “And why do you think I’m rich?”

“Your bag,” Stiles nodded to his satchel, “That’s fine leather, people from around here would know better than to walk around with something that nice in plain sight.”

“Huh. Well, I’ll remember that.” Derek swirled the remaining ice cream in his cup with the spoon, “And I live in Astoria, not Manhattan.”

Stiles whistled, “I wish. What are doing all the way out here if you live in Queens?”

“You know the library, like, fifteen blocks east?”

Stiles nodded, “My sister dragged me all over the city when I first moved here, exploring. We found it months ago, and I don’t know, it’s just peaceful. I like to go there before I go to work.”

“Oh, now we get to the juicy personal stuff,” Stiles rubbed his hands together, “Where do you work?”

The New Yorker,” Derek continued, when Stiles’ didn’t say anything, “It’s a magazine-“

“I know what The New Yorker is I don't live under a rock! I just can’t believe you work there! Isaac, Derek writes for The New Yorker!” Stiles practically vibrated in his seat.

“I don’t really write for them,” he corrected, “I just edit the final stages, and arrange its order and-“

“Edit! You’re an editor! Isaac, Derek edits for the New Yorker!” Stiles called. Isaac looked unbothered by the breaking news. “That’s so cool, no wonder you stick your nose up at us! You’re a regular smarty pants.”

Derek had been called a lot of things in his adult life, but smarty pants was never one of them.

“You know,” Stiles faked casualty, leaning back awkwardly, “The Parlor would make a killer interest piece,”


“What? Come on you could interview us and write about the quirky workers and fun atmosphere!”

“Stiles, I just told you I edit. What part of not writing did you miss?”

“But,” Stiles deflated, pointing to his head, “we’ve got hats.”

Derek barked out a laugh at Stiles pushed out bottom lip. “That’s true, you do have the hats.”

Stiles smiled as Derek finished the last bit of his ice cream. “So, since you’re not going to promote us in your big fancy magazine, at least tell me how amazing you thought the ice cream here was. Wasn’t it amazing? The best you’ve ever had? C’mon, admit it, admit it.”

It was not the best ice cream Derek had ever had. But it was pretty good, and with Stiles smiling wide and hopeful at him, Derek found himself nodding and smiling slow back at him, “Okay, I’ll admit it. This was some pretty good ice cream.”

Stiles raised an eyebrow at him, his face like thunder, “Pretty good?”

Derek opened his mouth confused, looking to Isaac briefly only to see him staring right back with a pitying look.

“Pretty good?” he raised his voice, “Ben & Jerry’s is pretty good. Starbucks is pretty good. I like to think we’re better than Starbucks.”

“You know you’re surprisingly hostile. Especially for someone with a stupid paper hat.”

“It’s not stupid, you big oaf!”

Derek couldn’t contain his smile at that, getting up and throwing his cup in a small trash bin. He walked back to the table, picking his bag up by the strap and putting it on. “This was the best ice cream I’ve ever had, there does that make you feel better?”

Stiles grinned up at him again, “Yes, yes it does.”

Derek left soon after saying goodbye to Stiles and Isaac (receiving an enthusiastic “come back again!” and silence, respectively) feeling lighter than he had in a long time. As he rode the elevator up to his work, he figured it was due to the change in routine he had for once.

He told Boyd as much.

“Probably. Lord knows if anyone needs to mix up their life it’s you.” Boyd told him.


The cashier didn’t move her eyes up from his pants, even when he waved the bills in front of her face.

“Ma’am,” he snapped, shoving the money at her when she finally raised her eyes.

“Oh!” she fumbled with money, visibly flustered.

“Keep the change.” he snatched the bag from her lax hand and stomped out of the doors.

He couldn’t even go to fucking Rite Aid without being stared at. He’d just run out quick when he saw he didn’t have any tooth paste. It was night, and he’d already changed into comfy clothes, so he made the mistake of just running out quick without changing.

He’s worn sweatpants. With no underwear.

Turned out, if the stare of the girl was anything to go by, the outline of his cock was pretty clear. Last time I go out like this, he thought bitterly.


“You’re back!” Stiles smiled at him when he walked into The Parlor that next week. He’d been swamped with work, like he always was in September. With the year welcoming in autumn, the magazine welcomed new trends and people with the same open arms. Things tended to get crazy at work, and when he finally had free time, his legs unwittingly seemed to walk him in the shop.

“Must have been your charm, I couldn’t stay away,” he dead-panned, walking to the counter.

“I knew it!” Stiles preened, “Now, what would you like this fine morning?”

“A small cup of vanilla, please.”

Stiles looked back in disbelief, “Are you serious? Plain vanilla again? What is wrong with you?”

“Why do you have plain vanilla if you badger every customer that gets it?”

“Because most people that get vanilla at least put sprinkles or caramel or M&Ms or something on it!” he motioned to the toppings behind him, “Not just vanilla,”

“What can I say, I’m a plain kind of guy,” handing Stiles a twenty when he gave him the ice cream. “Keep the change, someone told me this place could use all the money it can get.”

Stiles smiled brightly, putting the money in the register, “I would usually decline, but now that I know you’re loaded I have no problem taking money from you.”

Derek sat at the same table, less surprised when Stiles flopped in the chair across from him, “So how are you doing today, Derek Hale of Astoria?”

Derek smiled, spooning some ice cream into his mouth. “I’m fine,”

“Great! I’m glad you’re feeling fine today because so am I! I just got my tax returns and The Parlor is going to chug along for another month like the little engine that could!”


“I can feel your excitements from here, contain yourself,” Stiles said, pursing his lips.

“Well, considering this is the third time I’ve come in here, and the first time I had my wallet stolen-“

“That is water under the bridge! I apologized and you got your wallet back - it was not stolen! Isaac gave it back right after.” Stiles crossed his arms.

“Oh yes, Isaac, who glared at me both times I was here, that was great. Is he a vital part to your vintage aesthetic?” Derek raised a brow.

“Don’t be mean to Isaac, you bully, he’s just an acquired taste!”

“Do you notice every time I’m here you yell at me? And I’ve been here three times?”

“You’ve always deserved it!”

Derek looked at Stiles dryly, reach over and plucking the hat off his head.

“Hey!” Stiles cried, reaching out for the hat. Derek pulled his hand back, smirking at his indignant look. “Give it!”

Derek spun the hat on his finger, eating another spoonful of ice cream.

“You are being a child,” Stiles said sullenly, still reaching.

He continued eating, each time pulling the hat farther away when Stiles asked.

“Give me my hat!” Stiles whined after a few moments.

“I can’t, the vintage experience has been disturbed, I’m too upset.”

“It’s been disturbed because of you!” Stiles grumbled standing up to reach over the table, “I’m going to ban you from here if you don’t give me my hat!”

“Oh no, who will judge me for having vanilla ice cream then?”

Stiles narrowed his eyes again, pushing back from the chair to lunge for the hat. Falling across the table, he rolled off and chased after Derek when he pushed back from his seat.

“Give it!” he tried reaching around Derek. Derek dodged his hands, putting his back towards Stiles and clutching the hat to his chest.

“I don’t know, I really can’t promise anything,”

“Oh you are so vindictive, you know that!”

Derek laughed, speeding away from Stiles. They circled the tables, going around the store a few times before Stiles stopped and squared his shoulders, staring Derek down, “Derek, you have two seconds to relinquish my uniform, or feel Stilinski wrath.”

“I’m so scar- Ah!” Derek broke off when Stiles ran at him, gripped his shoulders and jumped on Derek, wrapping his legs around his hips. “What are you doing? Get off!”

“Never!” Stiles cried, reaching wildly for his hat and hitting Derek on the back.

“Ouch! Ouch, get off you psycho!” he laughed, throwing the hat on the ground. “There I let go!”

“Ha! I win!” Stiles crowed, wiggling his legs around Derek.

The front door opened then, and Scott bumbled in, followed by Isaac. They stopped in front of the door, staring at the two of them and Derek became very aware of the fact that Stiles was still on his back.

Isaac glared at Derek, “What are you doing?”

Derek couldn’t believe he’d done that. Playing like kids with Stiles made him feel light, and frankly, he was surprised he didn’t feel awkward and out of place with the man he’d just met, teasing and joking with him.

Stiles, not sensing the tension, answered merrily, “I was just wrecking Derek. He stole my hat.”

Isaac glared at Derek still while Scott grinned, “I’m surprised to see you back dude!”

“That’s what I said!”

“Well, me and Isaac’s shift starts now so you could give me a piggy back ride next,” Scott smiled broadly, walking past him to the back room.

Derek looked at Isaac, still looking at him distastefully, “Uh, no. I’ve got to get going,”

“Cool, you can walk me out,” Stiles said, tightening his hands around Derek’s shoulders.

“Are you getting off of me?” he asked, grabbing his bag from the chair.

“Nope, think of this as your punishment. For soiling my uniform. You can give me a ride. Where are you going now?”

“I’m going to the office, I have work,”

“Work?” Stiles asked incredulously, as Derek walked them out the door, “It’s like, one o’clock in the afternoon.”

“My job had more freedom than the rest of the office,” Derek admitted, hiking Stiles up further on his back, “Sometimes it’s nine to five, others it’s one to eight. It depends on what needs to be done.”

“Ahh, the hidden world of corporate editing, crazy.” Stiles sighed wistfully.

Derek carried Stiles the ten blocks to the subway entrance, and slowly let him down. Stiles grinned at him when he turned around, “Wow, you’re really strong. I could’ve guessed that from you know, looking at you, but a whole different playing field literally sitting on you.”

“I’m glad I gave you a first hand look, now are you coming or not?”

“No, I don’t need to take the train,”

“I asked you on the way here if you needed to go to the subway too!” Derek said exasperated.

“I lied! I live close by, in the complete opposite direction, actually.”

“The opposite direc- Why did you make me carry you then?!”

“I told you,” Stiles smiled smugly, “punishment. Make sure to come back soon!”

Derek took the stairs down two at a time after saying goodbye to Stiles. He caught the train before the doors closed and took a seat, settling in for the twenty-minute ride.

He couldn’t help but smile to himself, being around the younger man just made him feel better than he had in a long time. He couldn’t even bring himself to feel annoyed when a young guy on the train tried high fiving him, recognizing him from his old videos.


The next few weeks are a whirlwind of trying to get the latest edition of the magazine out on time and going to The Parlor. He went a total of six times, all before work and once after, sometimes eating, sometimes not. He tried to pretend that it’s because their ice cream is so damn good, and that it’s refreshing straying from his mundane schedule, but he knows the real reason he’s spending seven dollars on ice cream all the way out in Brooklyn.

Stiles. Slight in every way but personality, the brunette had firmly situated himself in Derek’s mind.

It just didn’t make sense, Derek thought frustrated, as his legs seemed to walk him to the ice cream shop on their own accord. Stiles was unlike anyone he’d been attracted to in the past, loud and unapologetically opinionated where others had been passive, awkward where others had been collected and smooth, loaded with baggage like running a business and a crew of characters weirder than Seinfeld’s.

That didn’t mean Derek wasn’t hopelessly attracted to him.

Derek found himself often watching as Stiles moved, jerky and uncoordinated, high lighting the slightness of his figure, the lean build with subtly definition. He desired to touch his milky skin, see it pink under his fingers like it so often did when Stiles flushed. He want to see if his moles wrapped around his full figure, grab the globes of his ass and pull Stiles against him. When Scott caught him staring he smirked, Isaac just glared at him. As usual.

Stiles still pretty much yelled at him everyday, for this and that, not trying new flavors, and putting his feet up on their tables. He also put him to work most days, lifting boxes in the back or mopping when he saw Derek was doing nothing. When Derek asked where his paycheck was at the end of the week, Stiles swatted him with the broom before telling him to sweep.

Stiles talked to him a lot, too, telling him all about his life. He learned that Stiles, Isaac, and Scott all came from the same town in California, and that his dad was the sheriff. He learned Isaac was four years older than Scott and Stiles, and had been adopted my Stiles’ dad when he was in high school (though he still didn’t know why). He knew that Scott married his girlfriend right out of high school, before splitting up after two months(Isaac won the bet on how long it would last), though Scott indignantly told him they were still friends. He learned that Stiles dropped out of college, NYU, after one semester, and used his saved up tuition to buy The Parlor.

Derek even managed to offer up some of his own life, like the fact that he had two sisters and was twenty eight, six years Stiles’ senior.

Liking Stiles didn’t seem to make sense, but he couldn’t help it. Stiles was interesting and explosive. Stiles made him laugh harder than he had in a long time. He never remembered feeling so comfortable with someone so quick, being able to joke, push buttons while having his pushed back, and not feel awkward and out of place.

He even brought Erica and Boyd once, kind of unsettled when Boyd and Isaac got along swimmingly.

Derek was the happiest he’d been in a long time.

He wasn’t surprised when he fucked it up.


Derek was walking down the street, carrying two large bags of ice in each arms with Stiles chattering a continuous stream of words next to him. It was the weekend, and Stiles texted him earlier that day, ordering him to come help with heavy lifting that day. Since Stiles was the only one working that day, it had just been the two of them, and they had steadily alternated between goofing off and working. It was the end of the day, and Derek was beat.

“Okay, now just empty the ice in between the ice cream, and then turn of the freezer. I’m gonna close up early,” Derek nodded, going behind the counter while Stiles locked the door and shut off the ‘open’ sign.

After, Derek waited for Stiles to come out from the back room, shooting off a quick text to Erica, telling her yes, he had remembered he was supposed to go over for dinner, and yes, he would pick up wine.

“You ready?”

Derek looked up, seeing Stiles in front of him buttoning up his jacket.

They walked out the front, pausing so Stiles could lock the door before stuffing the key into his pocket.

Derek was about to say goodbye when Stiles suddenly looked uncharacteristically nervous. Opening his mouth to ask what was wrong, Stiles blurted, “Do you want to go on a date with me?”

Derek was stunned into silence, so Stiles continued, “I would take you on a date unlike any other, it would be so cool! And I know you’re probably busy, and have equally as good looking and musclely people hanging off of you at any time of the day, but we have fun, right?”

“Stiles, I-“ Derek was at a loss. He was perfectly content with admiring Stiles from afar, in a sense. He was okay with pining. He liked pining, you could never be let down. Stiles acted the same with him as he did with everyone else. Of course Derek wasn’t blind to Stiles eyeing him, looking away when Derek caught his eye and becoming flustered. But that was completely physical, an attraction, something he was used to. Something he could handle. Stiles asking him out seemed out of the blue, and it scared the hell out of him.

“No.” he said firmly. “Sorry, but- No.”

Stiles flushed violently then, nodding wildly and fiddling with the zipper on his jacket. “Yeah, yeah okay, that’s yeah- I’m sorry I just thought I was reading this right, but I wasn’t, of course I wasn’t. “

Derek looked away, suddenly feeling awkward, “Um, I should go-“

“Yeah, yes of course. You have things to do, people to see, that’s- Fine. That’s fine, I’m going to- Bye,” with that Stiles sped off in the other direction, head down, leaving Derek feeling like shit.

He punched the wall once before leaving the store-front.


“You’re telling me you turned him down?!” Erica screeched at him when he told her and Boyd later that day.

He was sitting at their kitchen table with Boyd next to him, Erica standing in front of them, hands on her hips.

Rubbing his temples, Derek nodded, “Yes, that’s what I’m telling you.”

“What the fuck is wrong with you! You have been going all the way out to Brooklyn for a month to get ice cream just so you could see this kid, and now, now he asks you out and you say no? What the hell?" Erica exploded. She glared at him before shaking her head, "They might've called you The King but you're a damn fool!”

Derek looked to Boyd for help, but the man just shook his head and gave him a meaningful look. This is your problem, buddy.

“Erica, I just didn’t want to go out with him. And I happen to like ice cream-“

“Bullshit! You work out two hours every day, and eat salad for lunch, you think I’m gonna buy that you just decide to ruin all of that because you really like their ice cream?”

“I-“ Derek broke off when she game him a look.

“And I know you’ve jerked off thinking about him, Boyd told me about your shower fantasies.“

Derek looked to Boyd sharply. Bastard was resolutely looking away.

Sitting down opposite from him at the table, she asked, “Did he do something we don’t know about?”

“Well, no-“

“Is it the age difference?”


"Do you like him?"

"Of course I do, he’s great!"

"Then what is the fucking problem?"

"My dick!"

Erica barked out a laugh, covering her mouth when she saw Derek’s glare, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I know I shouldn’t laugh at your problems, but seriously?”

“Yes, okay,” Derek grumbled, “Look, it might be funny to you, but my dick has ruined most of my past relationships. People either pretend to like me to have sex with me cause they’ve seen my videos, or they only date me cause they like my body. It fucking sucks and I’m not going through it again.”

“And you think that’s Stiles? Do you really think he’s that shallow?”

“No!” Derek pinched his nose, “Stiles is great, I know that. But if I go out with him, I’m going to like him even more, I know that. And then eventually I’m going to have to tell him how I made a living for nearly ten years.”

“I thought you said you weren’t ashamed of doing porn?” Boyd piped in.

“I’m not, it’s just- I don’t expect you guys to get it, but after I tell people that I did porn, it doesn’t take long for them to look me up, or to recognize me from videos they’ve watched or whatever. But,” he swallowed, “it’s like after that it’s over. They’re in a relationship with my dick, they only care about fucking cause they want to see what a monster cock feels like. And that’s only if they didn’t already know who I was from the start.”

“That’s happened before?” Erica asked, shocked.

“Yeah, you remember Kate?” he asked, ignoring the stab of hurt that always came with that name.

“That girl you dated last year?”

“Yep. We were together for six months, I thought I was in love, and then one night she lets it slip that she knew who I was the moment she saw me, way before I ever told her. Didn’t even like me that much, just wanted to have sex with me.”

Derek stopped talking, mind flashing back to last year. He’d been so into Kate, her hot body, the way she agreed with all his thoughts and ideas, how she’d seemed so collected always. At the time he thought it was just because they were so similar, so perfect for each other. In hindsight, he could see how she’d just been pretending, covering up her sex-addiction and darker side.

“Was she- had this happened with anybody else?” Erica asked delicately.

“No, she wasn’t the first. She was just the last. After that I couldn’t take someone doing that to me again. I quit the studio, moved to New York, and stopped dating. This was never a problem again until Stiles.”

“Why didn’t you ever tell us about any of this?” Erica asked softly. Her and Boyd were watching him now, looking a little upset.

Derek coughed, trying to shake away the sad feelings, “I don’t know. I was embarrassed, I guess? That I was being fooled so easily into believing these people cared about me, when they just wanted to reenact scenes I’d done. “

“None of that’s your fault.” Boyd pointed out.

Derek rolled his eyes, “Yeah, I know guys. I’m not an idiot, I know these people were scum, and that I didn’t deserve it. This isn’t about punishing myself.”

“Then what’s it about? No, c’mon, just go out with Stiles. You like him, and it sounds like he likes you, so just give it a shot. And if he’s just another crazy fan, then just dump him and move on. But what’s the harm in trying?” Erica pushed.

Derek sighed. What was the harm? He didn’t think Stiles would do that to him, but it still scared the hell out of him to ruin the image he had of Stiles in his head. When had become such a pussy? He used to put himself out there, have fun and go wild. In the last year, he became closed off, grumpier. What had happened? Picking his nail, he thought about it, and Stiles. Young, sarcastic, Stiles. Did he really think he capable of being like the others? And, really what were the odds that people across the country would recognize a porn star and use him like in L.A.?

“Okay,” he finally settled, looking to Boyd and Erica, “I’ll give it a shot.”


Walking into The Parlor the next day was awkward, especially when he made eye contact with Stiles behind the counter. Stiles cheeks flushed and he looked down when he saw who it was. He looked pathetic, looking sad in the ice cream shop's paper hat.

“Just you today?” Derek asked, going up to lean on the counter.

“Yeah, Isaac caught the flu and I told him to stay home. Kind of had to force him to, actually. Well, you know how he is.” Stiles mumbled, playing with the scoopers in the ice cream tubs.

Derek nodding, grateful Isaac wasn’t there to glare at Derek when he asked, “So, I was wondering if you were still up for that date?”

Stiles looked up in surprised, looking very much like a fish. A cute fish. “But-what? Like, a date? With me? You and I, going out somewhere? That’s not here?”

“That generally is what a date is, yes.”

“But you shot me down!” Stiles cried, throwing his hands up, “I already put myself out there and were all ‘no’.” he put on a grouchy face and lowered his voice, imitating Derek.

Derek raised an eyebrow at that, causing Stiles to flush again. “Well, now I’m putting myself out there. I would like to go out with you. If you still want to, that is.”

Stiles smiled, slow and shy, “I mean, yeah, dude of course I still want to.”

Derek smiled wide, immensely glad, “I think you said something about a date unlike any other?”

Stiles grinned then nodding wildly, “Oh, get ready Derek Hale. Your world is about to be rocked.”


“This is where we’re having our date? Derek asked incredulously. It was the next day, and Stiles met him outside of a simple grocery store in Brooklyn.

“Yup!” Stiles was dressed the same as always, with loose fitting blue jeans and white t-shirt with a thicker flannel over it. The autumn chill colored his cheeks, making the splattering of moles across his face seem all the more dark. “I told you, this is going to be a date unlike any other you’ve been on in your life,”

“What are we going to do, pick up food for, like, a picnic?”

“No! A picnic, really? Do you really think I’m that predictable?”


“Good! Now follow me,” Stiles motioned for Derek and walked through the automatic doors, making a bee line to the back of the store.

“So if we aren’t here to get food, then-“ Derek trailed off as Stiles turned to face him with his arms out. They were in front of the sea food section, with the large water tanks behind him. “What is this?”

“This is our date!” Stiles broke out into a smile, grabbing Derek’s arm and pulling him to stand in front of the lobster tank, “LFC, one time only, win it all tournament!”


“Lobster Fighting Championships!” Stiles pointed into the tank, “Look there are ten lobsters in there now. That’s a big number, this is gonna be good!”

“Let me get this straight,” Derek asked, blankly, “I took a train all the way down to Brooklyn, to go to a random grocery story and watch lobsters fight.”

“Don’t pretend like you aren’t coming down here every day anyway, grumpy.” Stiles said giving him a dry look, “Besides, I told you I would take to on a date unlike any other you’d ever been on. And when a Stilinski man makes a promise, he keeps it.”

Derek huffed a laugh, stepping closer to Stiles. He put his hand on the small of Stiles’ back, herding him in while letting people with carts pass him, “I don’t doubt it,”

“Good!” Stiles smiled, reaching into his pocket and giving him money. “Now, I promised to treat you to dinner. You know I don’t break them, so take this and grab some appropriate food. Think 1950’s rich white family before going to the boxing ring. That’s the kind of food we need.”

Derek had no clue what kind of food that meant, so he returned with a bag of premade popcorn, two bottles of soda, and box of hot fudge sundae Pop Tarts. Stiles seemed to think it fit his food theme, so he figured he did okay.

“You’re just in time, too. The first fight’s about to start, and I’m feeling this guy on the right,” Stiles said, cracking open his drink and taking a swig, “He just has a fire in his eyes that this other one just doesn’t have,”

“Yeah,” Derek agreed dumbly, biting into a Pop Tart. The lobsters crawled to each other, raising their claws threateningly.

“Oh, oh there they go there they go!”

Derek watched as the lobsters started hitting one another, thinking that this was easily the weirdest date he’d been on, and he went on a date with a nudist. He liked Stiles a lot, though, so he would just have to suck it up.


“Go! Go, what is he doing?!” Derek exploded, watching his pick for the LFC title get his tail handed to him. “Fight back! What are you doing, don’t just stand there!”

Stiles cackled next to him, leaning closer to the tank, “Go Larry go! You can do it, this is it! You can win it all right here!”

“Shut up,” Derek lightly shoved Stiles, ignoring his laugh, “Don’t listen to him man, you can still do it, just fight back!”

Despite Derek’s encouragements, his lobster fell on to it’s back, Stiles’ contender taking advantage and smacking him with it’s claw. Derek groaned, letting his head fall between his shoulders.

Stiles jumped up and down, whooping so loud the worker behind the sea food counter jumped. “Victory! K.O.! I win the ultimate LFC tournament!”

“You cheated, don’t act like I didn’t see you tap on the glass round 3, that doesn’t count!”

Stiles put a hand to his ear, “What is that I hear? The whine of a loser, perhaps?”

“Oh fuck you, you little-“


Derek and Stiles turned around to see a man dressed in a dress shirt with the manager tag attached to his shirt, a teenager in an apron standing behind him looking amused. The manager put a hand on his hip, “We are going to have to ask the two of you to leave.”

Derek at once became aware of the weirdness of the situation, two grown ass men squatting in front of a lobster tank in a grocery store, yelling, surrounded by wrappers and the trash from their “dinner”.

Stiles flushed under the scrutiny, “Oh yeah, sorry, here I’ll just-”

“Sir, we will clean this, just, please-“ he gestured to the door.

“No, no we made a mess-“ bending over to pick up the empty popcorn back, Stiles’ butt bumped into a sweets table behind him, sending several plastic cupcake containers crashing to the ground. Containers opened, spilling cupcakes out on to the floor.

“Shit!” Stiles swore. He kneeled down, gathering the debris and smearing the frosting in neon, clumped streaks.

Derek stepped over to go and help Stiles. His shoe stepped on an empty wrapper, sliding across the frosting and sending Derek falling down on to his butt with a ‘squish’ as he smashed the deserts into a condensed mush. The wrapper he stepped on flung off his foot, hitting Stiles directly in the cheek.

Derek and Stiles sat in a stunned silence. Stiles looked up at the exasperated manager nervously laughed, “Okay, but what are the odds of that happening, am I right?”

The manager stared irritably at him.

“Um, if we could, like, have a mop-“

“Get out!”

“Yessir,” Derek mumbled, grabbing Stiles’ hand and dragging them towards the door. Halfway out Stiles started giggling and Derek huffed out a small laugh too.

They walked out the door laughing like idiots. Stiles didn’t let go of his hand.


They walk for an hour after, under street lamps and along sidewalks. The city vibrated with life, the Friday night bringing drunk friends and drag queens and racket out with it. They didn’t mind one bit, dancing across the streets literally and figuratively.

“I really don’t know that much about you,” Stiles commented casually, pulling Derek into an empty playground.

Derek let himself be pulled to the swings where they sat side by side. He reluctantly let go of Stiles’ hand and immediately missed it’s warmth. “You know a lot about me.”

“I know that you have sisters. I know you live in Asoria and work in Manhattan. I know you have two awesome friends, and can’t be expected to be nice in the morning before you get coffee,” he laughed lightly when Derek shoved him, “But that’s it. I’ve known you for a month now, I think I should get a little more than that!”

“That’s not exactly a long time,”

“It’s a long enough! You’re still a mystery, for all I know you could have been a spy before I met you. Or a foreign diplomat, or a porn star!”

Stiles laughed at Derek’s panicked look, misinterpreting it as disbelief as opposed to terror, “I know, I know, crazy, but what else am I supposed to think.”

Derek breathed deep in through his nose, because Stiles said that jokingly, not like he knew and wanted to casually drop it in before he invited him up to his bedroom, jokingly, breathe. “I, I tried to be a gym teacher for a little while.”

“A gym teacher?”

“Yeah, I went to college for physical education. Four years, then I did a trial T.A. job for two months and hated it.” Derek admitted.

“That’s crazy! Oh my God that’s so annoying, I went to college for a semester and wanted to shoot myself, I can’t imagine four years for nothing!”

“Well, I got a diploma out of it so I can’t complain.”

“And then you got the editing job after so it wasn’t that bad,” Stiles agreed, pushing himself back to swing faintly.

“Yeah,” Derek said awkwardly. Technically it was true, he did get the editing job after he T.A.ed. Just, not directly after. “What about you, I want to hear something about you,”

“Hmm,” Stiles scratched his chin, and Derek was grateful for the change of subject. “Oh! Okay, this date. The one we are on right now. Is the third date I’ve ever been on.”

“What?” Derek asked surprised.

“Yeah,” Stiles nodded, “I’ve only had one kind of serious relationship, if you’d even call it that, and we went out, like actually went out, only two times.”

“Why only two times?”

“He was sort of an asshole. I couldn’t tell at the time, cause he was like, the first and only guy I ever dated, so I thought it was normal to just want to lock us in his house. I practically forced him out the two times we did go on dates, so he was miserable the whole time and we went home after an hour.”

“Stiles- that’s horrible,” Derek said softly, feeling irrationally mad at this man he’d never met.

“Trust me, I know that now. He was a jerk, biggest mistake of my life.”

“How long did you guys go out, if you don’t mind me asking,”

Stiles leaned back, “No it’s alright. His name was Kevin, and we dated for like seven months? We met online, on this NYU meet up for people on the west coast and just clicked. It was good for a little while, and then we got to school and it got bad really quick.”

“What happened?”

“I still don’t know. He started doing drugs, and at first it was only at parties so I didn’t mind but then it was always. And he got really paranoid and irritable, started getting mad when I talked to anyone else but him, didn’t want to leave his dorm even to go to class. When I was going to leave for winter break he punched me in the face cause he thought I wanted to leave him,”

“He hit you?!” Derek growled, grabbing the chain of Stiles’ swing to make the younger man face him.

Stiles smiled, covering his hand with his, “Don’t worry, I pushed him back and broke up with him on the spot. I think I actually got him a little worse, Isaac was proud. Though, not proud enough that I didn’t have to basically beg him not to go kill Kev.”

“I don’t blame him,” Derek mumbled, rubbing his thumb over Stiles’ hand.

“To be honest I don’t either. But, the main thing to take from that story is you are only my third date ever. And by far my best one,”

“Tough competition.”

They were quiet for a second before Stiles asked nervously, “Did I make this weird? I’m sorry I sprang that incredibly heavy detail about my life on you on our first date. I don’t think that’s good first date etiquette.”

Derek shook his head, “No, I’m glad I know, it’s an important thing that happened to you. Besides, when have you ever done anything by the book in your life, anyway?”

Stiles considered that before shrugging, “You’re probably right.”

They chatted for a few more minutes before Stiles looked at his watch and groaned, “It’s getting late. I probably have to go home, I’m opening tomorrow.”

“Yeah, of course,” Derek boldly grabbed Stiles hands again, “You live close, right? I’ll walk you home,”

The walk home was different from the rest of the night. They walked home closely, comfortably silent. When they stopped in front of Stiles’ building, Stiles hugged him close and kissed him on the cheek. He then turned and went inside, leaving Derek without a real kiss or an invitation to come upstairs. It was different than any other date he’d been on before, and he’d never been more pleased.


Derek wasn’t sure how to act walking into The Parlor the next day. He thought the date went well, so he was pretty sure they’d go out again. But, it was the very next day after date number one, and after a year of being alone, he wasn’t much sure on normal post-date procedure.

The bell chimed as Derek entered, causing Scott and Stiles to look up from where they were standing behind the counter.

“Derek!” Stiles smiled happily, walking out to meet him halfway. He grabbed Derek’s hand and pulled him over to where they were, “Perfect timing! We are taste testing new flavors before we order them and we’re stuck!”

“And I want to hear about your date!” Scott said, causing Stiles to groan next to him, “I heard Stiles took you to the LFC tanks. He beat you right? He’s freaky good at knowing whose going to win.”

“Our date was wonderful and intimate, and none of your business,” Stiles said firmly. Then, to Scott, “I’ll tell you all about it tonight dude,”

“Discrete,” Derek snorted.

Isaac walked in from the back room regarding Derek silently before turning to Scott, “Alright, Ross, let’s get this show on the road. I’m not on the clock and I’d like to minimize the time I’m here.”

“Okay,” then, “Hey!”

Derek looked to Stiles,” Ross?”

Stiles giggled, poking Scott obnoxiously, “We call Scott the Ross of our friend group cause he falls in love super easy and rushes into things, so he’s totally gonna be the one married three times.”

“He’s already got one down,” Isaac commented mildly.

“Hey! That marriage doesn’t count. And I’m not the Ross of our group!”

“Whatever, Geller.” Stiles challenged.

Scott narrowed his eyes before running after Stiles, who skidded away laughing, “Derek, help me!”

Derek smiled watching Stiles, feeling lighter already. Plus, Stiles’ ass looked great in his pants.


Derek and Stiles went four more times, twice to restaurants (Derek’s picks), once go-karting (Stiles’), and another time people-watching in the park (Stiles’). Each time ended better than the last, and Derek was hypnotized by the feeling on Stiles’ mouth on his. Their last date had ended with them making out furiously on Derek’s couch, and when Stiles tentatively asked if they were boyfriends Derek didn’t hesitate to answer in the affirmative.

Things hadn’t gone farther than second base, stopping abruptly when Stiles hand got dangerously close to his dick. Derek wasn’t ashamed of his penis, hell it earned him a living, but he didn’t want to go down the same path that his other relationships went down. He found that people kind of lost their minds when faced when a large penis. For now, Derek wanted to enjoy his deliciously platonic relationship.

Derek was enjoying the bliss at his job, humming softly when Boyd commented.

“You seem happier. I take it things with Stiles are going well.”

Derek beamed, “They’re going great. It’s still new but, I think this is serious. I can feel it.”

Boyd returned his smile, sitting down on one of the chairs in their office, “That’s how it was with me and Erica.”

Derek felt pleased at the comparison.

“Does he know about your film career?”

Derek frowned, “I don’t see why he needs to,”

“Uh, maybe because it’s a huge part of your past and a large catalyst of the failures of your past few relationships.”

Derek groaned, “Yeah, that really makes me want to tell him about it.”

“Wouldn’t you rather see his reaction to it before you get in too deep?”

“I guess, I don’t know. I don’t think he would be like everyone else is about it, but it’s still hard to tell. I thought the same about a lot of people.”

“Well, maybe me and Erica can scope him out, see if we see anything fishy,”

“Maybe,” Derek sighed, poking around photos on the table with a tweezer.

Boyd stared at him, “That was my subtle way of saying Erica told me to tell you to go on a double date with us.”

“What!” Derek exclaimed, “It’s way too soon for that,”

“Hey, I don’t disagree with you on that one, but try telling Erica that,”

“So that means it’s happening no matter what I say,” Derek put his head in his hands.

Boyd nodded, “She made reservations for tomorrow night.”

When Derek left work an hour later, already dialing Stiles’ number.

“Hello handsome boyfriend o’mine!”

“Hey, do you want to go on a probably embarrassing double date with my friends?”

Stiles laughed over the line, “Nothing I would want to do more! When and where?”


“So, tell me about yourself, Stiles.” Erica folded her hands under her chin and stared Stiles down. She looked beautiful, blonde hair in billowing curls swept off her shoulder, and a lowcut black dress.

They’d been at the restaurant about fifteen incident free minutes before Erica began to change that.

Stiles fidgeted, “I, um, I own an ice cream parlor?”

Erica raised an eyebrow, “Yes. We know. We’ve been there, remember?”

“Oh! Yeah, I do.” Stiles flushed, hands fidgeting under the table.

“So, tell me more about yourself.”

“I live alone, in Brooklyn, and, erm, my favorite band is Blink 182,”

Erica and Boyd stared.

“You know, like, all the small things,” Stiles started singing, “She left me roses by the stairs, surprises let me know she cares…” Stiles trailed off lamely.

Derek swallowed his laugh at the display, not wanting to embarrass the already nervous Stiles. For some reason, Stiles was tense the whole night, from the moment Derek picked him up.

“Derek, stop goofing around! Tell me if this looks good!”

Stiles extended his arms out, looking positively miserable in a maroon dress shirt and black dress pants.

“Yes! Stiles, it’s fine! They aren’t going to care about what color your shirt is and if it goes with your belt!”

“I have to make a good impression!”

“You’ve already made one, they’ve been to the ice cream shop a bunch of times! Hell, I’ve even had Boyd put in a good word about me to Isaac because they’ve started hanging out! This is just friends getting together.”

Stiles huffed, ignoring him, “That’s exactly what they want you to think.”

“Stiles, if I’m going tell you all The King here's super embarrassing stories I’m going to need at least one deep, dark secret about you, it’s only fair,” Erica leaned forward onto the table, her breasts practically spilling on to the table.

Stiles, Derek will give him credit, tried valiantly not to stare at them. “Um, I’m gay?”

Everyone at the table couldn’t help giving him a look.

“I don’t know! This is pressure, I can’t think of a secret under these conditions!”

“Well, think of something.” Erica pushed.

Stiles threw out his arms in exasperation, only to knock over his glass of water, which in turn, knocked over Derek’s. Water spilled onto the table and off onto Derek’s pants.

“Oh my God!” Stiles cried, grabbing his napkin and aggressively blotting the water off of his pants, causing friction against Derek’s cock.

“Stiles stop!” Derek grabbed his hands. What he’d been doing dawned on Stiles and he looked even more distressed.

“Bathroom! Use it. I need to,” he bumbled, getting up and jerking a finger to the men’s room. “Be right back.” With that he skidded in the other direction.

As soon as Stiles had left the table, Erica released a giggle. Derek glared at her, “I’m sorry, but he’s just so nervous! It’s funny, it’s like he thinks that this date is actually gonna have an affect on your relationship.”

“He does think that!”

“Oh come on,” Erica scoffed, sipping her wine, “You have to admit that was funny.”

Derek looked to Boyd who slung an arm around Erica, “It was pretty funny.”

“We like him though,” Erica continued, “We were talking about this before we got here, but he’s good for you. You’re acting young again when you’re with him, not like the forty year old you used to be.”

Derek looked at her.

“Look, he’s probably in the bathroom giving himself a pep talk in the mirror. He’ll be back in a sec, calm down.”

When the food arrived and Stiles still hadn’t returned, Derek started to feel nervous.

“I’m gonna go see where he is.” Derek got up, leaving Erica ripping apart her ribs and Boyd nodding in understanding.

“Stiles?” he called when he went into the bathroom. No response. Then, he heard it. The labored breaths and little whines coming from the handicap stall. He went over and knocked, “Stiles?”

The noises only got louder, and Derek banged on the stall “Stiles? Is that you?” He crouched down to look at the shoes, and after confirming they were Stiles’ black loafers, crawled under the stall door.

Standing back up, Derek’s heart jumped in his chest seeing Stiles. The younger man was sitting on the toilet, hunched over with his hands on his knees. He was gasping in air like it was ripping down his throat and tears were steadily streaming down his cheeks.

Panic attack.

“Stiles!” Derek called gently, not wanting to startle the young man. His sister Cora had them when his grandmother died when she was only thirteen. He remembered standing fearfully behind his dad as he gently brought her back and calmed her. He needed to do that for Stiles. “Stiles I need you to listen to me. I know it’s scary and it sounds hard, but I need you to match your breathing to mine.”

“I-“ Stiles gasped, “I can’t,”

“Yes you can, you are the strongest person I know. Just, concentrate.” Derek said firmly. He took deep breaths, in and out, waiting patiently as Stiles battled his way through imitating his breathing.

After minutes, or maybe hours, Derek didn’t know, Stiles was breathing normally. The man sagged against Derek, tired and miserable.

“Are you okay?” he asked softly.

“Yeah,” Stiles whispered.

Derek reached into his pocket and pulled out a handkerchief, “here,”

Stiles sniffled and took it. “Who carries handkerchiefs anymore?” he asked disbelievingly.

“Shut it,” Derek fake threatened. He rubbed Stiles’ knees as the younger man came back completely. “That one was quick,”

“It had been going on a while before you came in,” Stiles admitted, “Probably would have gone on longer without you,”

“I’m glad I was here then.”

“How did you know what to do?” Stiles asked, dabbing his eyes with the handkerchief.

“My sister, Cora, she used to get them. It scared the hell out of me, so I watched what my dad did to calm her down, so if it ever happened when he wasn’t around, I could help her.”

Stiles smiled, “That’s so sweet,” then, swallowing hard, “I got them since I was a kid, I’ve just had a lot of problems like that. They get worse if I’m upset or stressed, like they got really bad after my mom died, and after Kevin hit me.”

“Why did you just have one?” he asked softly.

“Look, I know it’s stupid because we’ve only been going out a few weeks, but I really like you. And these are your best friends and you’ve told me how much they mean to you and-“ Stiles swallowed, “I don’t want to fuck this up.”

“You won’t, I like you and they do too.” Derek stressed, putting his hand on Stiles’ cheek.

Stiles nodded, and sniffled “We better get back out there.

Derek looked at his boyfriend, eyes red-rimmed, sitting on a toilet, “Nah, let’s get out of here.”

Stiles snapped his neck up to look at Derek, “We’re on a date with your friends! We can’t just-“

“Ditch them?” Derek grinned, “Yes, we can.”

“No! Derek, in case you didn’t notice I’m already nervous enough about my impression on them, we can’t just leave!”

“Stiles, babe, they already love you. They visit The Parlor almost as much as me now. And, this night wasn’t about feeling you out, it was about them trying to get embarrassing stories about me from you, and telling some of their own. When you left for the bathroom Erica told me how she thinks you’re good for me,”

Stiles looked hesitant and hopeful, “She did?”

“Yes, she did. They won’t care if we skip, to be honest they’ll probably eat all our food. Seriously, they’ve ditched me before just to have sex, at least we have a reason,” Derek pushed, feeling Stiles reservations fade.

Stiles bit his lip, then nodded, “Okay, yeah let’s go.”

Stiles hugged Derek’s arm as they left the bathroom and headed to the door. Derek caught Erica’s eye across the restaurant and nodded to Stiles, then the door. She gave them a knowing look and a thumbs up.


“You’re Derek Hale!”

Derek looked up up from his book to see a guy wearing Ray Bans in a sleeveless shirt smiling excitedly in front of him. He was waiting for Stiles to meet him in the park.

Derek stifled the urge to sigh, “Yes, I am.”

“I saw you in Monster Cock Monthly two years ago, changed my life, swear to God! I knew I was gay after I saw that picture of you jacking off! So hot!”

“That’s- great,” he forced out. Stiles would be meeting him soon, he couldn’t let him hear this.

“Well, I just wanted to say hi, and you know, I love your work. Have you considered doing more films?”

He saw Stiles in the distance, waving and coming towards him. Nervously he said, “No, my career is over. I’m actually meeting someone here soon so-“

The guy was understanding, “Yeah, man, totally. I can’t wait to tell the guys I met Derek Hale king of-“

“It was good meeting you,” Derek interrupted getting up and walking to meet Stiles halfway.

“Hey, hot stuff,” Stiles smiled, leaning up to kiss his cheek. He looked behind Derek.

Derek turned to see the guy grinning and shaking his head, “You’re the man!” he yelled giving them a thumbs up.

Stiles chuckled, “Who was that?”

Derek put an arm around his shoulders, “Confused me for somebody else. How was your day?”


Derek hurriedly unlocked the door to his apartment a few days later as he heard his phone. Rushing in he put the grocery bags on the counter and picked the phone up from where it sat on his microwave. He checked the caller idea. Laura. Shit.

Taking a breath before he answered, Derek hit the green button, “Hello?”

“Would you care to tell me why I have to hear my little brother is dating someone for the first time in a year from Erica instead of him?”

“Hello to you too, Laura,” he said monotone.

“Why does Erica know and not me? I’m your sister!” Laura demanded.

“You need to stop talking to my friends,” Derek grumbled.

“Derek! Start talking!”

Derek took a seat on one of the chairs in his kitchen, this was going to be long, he could just tell, “It’s new. We’ve only been dating a month.”

A month?! And you didn’t tell me?” Laura yelled.

“Laura, I-“

“Tell me about him! Now!”

Derek internally groaned, “His name is Stiles. He’s twenty two, he owns his own business, he’s a little shorter than me, and-“

“Don’t just describe him,” Laura chastised, the idiot was implied. “What’s he like?”

Derek thought of Stiles, “He’s great, he’s really weird and quirky, but he’s so funny and unafraid to be himself. He doesn’t let the people he cares about slide when they do something shitty. He’s- he’s a real force of nature.”

“He sounds great,” Laura laughed, “Just the way you talk about him, I can tell it’s real.”

“It is, Laura I- I really like him. And I think mom and dad would have too.”

Laura’s quiet and Derek knows the feeling. Their parents have been a sore subject for all of them since they died three years prior, in a car crash. Derek still misses them, craves their guidance when he’s upset.

“Well then,” Laura said after a moment, “that settles it, me and Cora need to meet him.”

“What?” That snaps Derek out of it, “What, no, Laura it’s a new relationship,”

“So? He’s already met Erica and Boyd.”

“Yeah, but family is different. That makes it serious,”

“It kind of already sounds like you’re serious.”

He couldn’t argue with that one. “I don’t want to scare him off,”

“And we won’t,” Laura stated, with a finality that makes Derek know he’d lost. “We’ll come up in a few weeks anyway, we don’t know when our schedules will allow. But we are meeting him.”

The siblings chat for a few more minutes before Laura hung up, having to get back to the hospital she worked at. Derek sat in his couch for a few minutes, idly thinking. He was serious when he told Laura that he really cared about Stiles.

Despite only being together for a month, Stiles fit into Derek’s life seamlessly, like he had always belonged there. He always wanted to be near Stiles, joking with him, arguing with him. It all made him happy. Happier than he’d been in any other past relationship, even ones that lasted years. He’d told Stiles everything. Well, almost everything.

Derek felt a little bad, Stiles told him everything, what his favorite flower was, the xbox game he played the most, even his abusive ex boyfriend. Derek couldn’t even tell Stiles about his old job. It was just- Derek had been burned. And would prefer to keep Stiles and his new relationship in it’s own bubble. Derek was sure Stiles didn’t know who he was, must not have seen videos with him in them, and as much as Erica called him crazy he wanted to keep Stiles ignorant for as long as possible.

He and Stiles hadn’t even had sex yet, which for Derek, was a first. Not for lack of wanting. Stiles and Derek had close calls, when their making out got so heavy that Derek had to stop them. They had sleepovers where Derek had to remove himself from the bed in the morning because Stiles looked so damn good. Stiles was understanding, though. Having only slept with one man in his life, something he’d whispered to Derek one late night, a man who’d hurt him in an unimaginable way, Stiles wasn’t ready to jump into bed with Derek either.

Derek just wanted to protect himself. His logic was that if he could wait until he was sure that Stiles wouldn’t only stay with him for his dick, or his sexual prowess, then this relationship would work. Derek groaned, even in his head it sounded kind of stupid.

He was still thinking when his buzzer rang. Getting up he pushed the speak button, “Yeah?”

“It’s me!” Stiles voice came crackling through the speaker.

“I’ll buzz you up,”

Derek pressed the button and collapsed on his couch. That was where Stiles found him when he walked in the door a minute later.

“You look more annoyed than usual,” Stiles teased, tucking himself under Derek’s arm on the couch.

“My sisters want to meet you.”

It was quiet for a second and Derek opened his eyes to see Stiles looking worried next to him.

“Is that a bad thing?” he asked.

“No!” Derek said quickly, trying to amend the situation. “I want you to meet them, I do, I was just worried it’d freak you out, like too much too soon.”

“I told my dad about you.”

Derek looked to Stiles, “You did?”

Stiles looked suddenly shy, “Yeah, I mean. Maybe it is soon, but I like you a lot. And I wanted my dad to know that. I don’t think it’s too soon if you don’t.”

Derek smiled then, “No, then I guess I don’t.”

Stiles grinned, leaning up to kiss Derek’s chin, “Besides, I’m sure they have a lot more embarrassing stories than Erica and Boyd do,”

Derek groaned, “That’s it, I’m canceling.”

Stiles laughed, “C’mon lets go out tonight; exchange your grumpy pants for some dancing shoes.” Stiles took his hands in his, standing them up and shimmying Derek towards his closet.

“You’re an idiot,” he said fondly. He pulled Stiles close and kissed him softly, sucking on his bottom lip. When he pulled back Stiles was smiling dopily at him.

“You love it.”


“Come back to bed,” Derek called from Stiles’ room. “Are you still organizing your bookshelf you won’t let me near,”

“No!” Stiles cried in a way that told him he was. Derek walked in that day to find Stiles reading. When he came up behind him, Stiles’ slammed the book shut, looking flustered. Derek was going to ask but Stiles shoved him into his room, hurriedly saying he’d be in in a minute.

Usually Derek would ask what that was about, but he figured he had secrets of his own, he’d be a hypocrite to demand to know Stiles’. Plus, Stiles was weird, he should have been used to this behavior by that point.

“Can I ask you something?” Derek whispered to Stiles, later that night. They were curled up in Stiles’ bed watching Friends on cable, wrapped around each other after days of work stopping them from seeing each other.

“Yep,” Stiles popped the ‘p’, playing with the fingers of Derek’s hand.

“What’s Isaac’s problem with me?”

Stiles froze, dropping Derek’s hand. He turned to face Derek, “Did he do anything?”

Derek thought back to earlier today. After Derek came to The Parlor after work, he’d pecked Stiles on the lips in greeting. Nothing out of the ordinary. Except for Isaac’s more-heated-than-usual disapproving glares.

“I mean, not anything different from the usual glares and general distaste.”

Stiles face twisted and he absentmindedly traced patterns on Derek’s chest. Derek waited until finally, “He’s just really protective me, is all.”

Derek hummed, waiting for Stiles to elaborate.

“Did Scott ever mention to you why my dad adopted Isaac?” Stiles asked.

Derek shook his head.

“Isaac’s dad started hitting him after his brother died, when Isaac was like, twelve. He did fucked up shit, and if you and Isaac ever get close, he can tell you more about it, but that’s not my story to tell.” Stiles swallowed, “So, anyway, when I was in eighth grade me and Scott snuck out one night and found Isaac sitting alone on a park bench, all bruised and bleeding. He was really quiet, I guess he was in a state of shock, because we asked him all sorts of questions and just sat there, it was so scary.”

Derek hung on to every word, sensing how important this was to Stiles, and curious to know more about Isaac.

“Anyway, we didn’t know what to do, so we started walking him to my house. He didn’t even put up a fight, just walked like a zombie the whole way back to my house. He slept until two the next day and when he woke up he was so freaked out he started screaming at us and didn’t stop until we promised not to tell anyone what happened and that it was all a mistake. And, being a stupid kid, I believed him. I didn’t tell my dad, but I hung out with him the next week. It was mostly me talking, but I felt like it was important, ya’know. That he had someone talking to him.”

Stiles swallowed again and licked his lips, opening them for a second before continuing, “The next week I didn’t see him for a few days, and then when I did he was even more bruised than the last time. I went to my dad after that and admitted the whole thing, told him that we needed to help Isaac. So, my dad opened this whole investigation and Isaac was taken from his home and bounced around in foster care for a while before my dad adopted him.”

“How did Isaac react?” Derek asked delicately.

“Bad,” Stiles chuckled humorlessly, “Screamed at me when he found out about how I ruined his life and how could I do this to him and all sorts of stuff. Didn’t talk to me for months after that, even when he started living with us.”

“When’d he stop?”

“I had a really bad day at school one day, and I came back and said hi to Isaac, which he ignored, and I just got really overwhelmed with the whole situation so I started crying. I was saying how sorry I was and that he needed to tell me what I did wrong and I tried to do the right thing by telling my dad. I swear, it was like a movie, dude, total chick flick meltdown. But after that he hugged me and apologized. He said he never wanted me to feel like I had to apologize when someone else is being an asshole, that he knew what that felt like and was sorry he made me feel that way.”

Derek thought about Isaac, cool and thoughtful, always watching and protecting those he cared about. Knowing this, feeling the weight of a situation he’d only heard about, Isaac’s demeanor made sense. The man held himself with a strength that seemed unparalleled to the strength of those around him, even forces of nature like Erica.

“After that he was really protective of me, scaring my bullies and making sure to tell me if I did a good job. Typical Hallmark stuff. I thought he was going to kill Kevin when I told him what happened, he was so furious. A little too close to home.” Stiles said, putting a hand around Derek’s waist and scooting closer. “If he seems wary of you, it’s just his suspicions. But when he sees you like I do, I know he’ll like you, just give him time.”

Derek nodded, playing with Stiles’ hair. The information unsettled him but he was a little glad to know that Stiles didn’t think Isaac hated him. Stiles probably knew better than he did.


Derek was at Scott’s apartment, sitting on his couch and silently watching the action around him. Derek was touched when Scott invited his to his apartment warming party, glad to be considered a friend by one of the most important people in Stiles’ life. However, Derek had never felt closer to thirty than he had sitting, nursing his second beer, while people all mostly under the age of twenty five, were smashed. Mildly, he wondered if this was what other people saw when he was their age, because he knew he acted the same.

There was a sentence that made him feel old.

Sipping on his beer he watched Stiles across the room, far past drunk, swaying in his seat as he talked to a pretty brunette. He didn’t know most of the people here, but didn’t want Stiles to feel like he couldn’t leave his side or enjoy himself tonight, so he practically pushed him to his friends after an hour of his hovering.

Stiles looked delicious tonight, in a loose white t-shirt and jeans that hugged his round ass. Derek had the fortune of grabbing it whenever he wanted, and before they came to the party he’d palmed his two plump cheeks when they were making out on Stiles’ couch. All he could think of was spreading them apart and sinking into that tight-

“Hey man!” a hand clapped down on his shoulder and he turned to find Scott, wasted, plop on the couch next to him.

“Hi Scott,” Derek greeted him, shaking himself, “Great party,”

“Thanks! You don’t look like you’re enjoying it too much. You’re sitting all alone, like, like you’re a loner.”

Derek snorted watching Scott. Drunk, he was like Stiles sober, babbling about all his thoughts, hair sticking up like he’d run his hands through it.

“You aren’t drunk! Are you drunk?” Scott leaned closed, sloshing some drink onto his couch. He looked at the stain, betrayed, “Aw, man.”

“I’m sure it’ll come out.”

“I sure hope so,” he slurred, easing himself back into the couches cushions. “Wait!” He gasped out suddenly, “Where is Stiles? He isn’t with you?”

Derek motioned to where Stiles was, still talking to the brunette, “He’s over there, talking to that girl.”

Scott leaned up to see, “Ugh, he’s talking to Allison.”

“Who's Allison?”

“She’s my ex-wife,” Scott said petulantly, crossing his arms.

“Ohh,” Derek said looking back over. She was tall and pretty, with wide eyes like Stiles’, “So that’s the wife.”

“Ex-wife,” Scott pointed out grumpily, “It’s still so awkward,”

“Why’d you invite her then?”

“Because!” he stretched out the word like Derek was an idiot, “We broke up mutually, but agreed we’d stay friends. I invited all our old high school friends, I couldn’t not invite her without looking like I wasn’t okay with breaking up!”

“Well, are you okay with it?” Derek asked.

“Yes!” Scott said unconvincingly.

Derek raised an eyebrow at him.

“Don’t you eyebrow me, Derek!” Scott cried sloppily.

“Is there some reason you guys couldn’t work it out?” Derek asked gentler, trying a different angle.

Scott blew out a breath, blowing his hair upwards. “We were just always fighting after we moved in together. I didn’t want to work it out, I wanted her to just, like, agree with me more,” he pouted.

“That’s not really how it works.”

“I know that! We were eighteen when we got married, I wasn’t mature then!”

“And you are now?”

Scott glared at Derek.

“Why don’t you tell her you want her back?”

“Because,” Scott whined, “She’s clearly moved on!”

“How do you know that?”

“She didn’t make an excuse not to come tonight! If she wasn’t over me, she wouldn’t want to fly all the way out to New York to see that I was doing okay, and had a job and an apartment and was well adjusted,” Scott mumbled. “Plus, look at her she’s been smiling and laughing all night.”

Derek thought about it, “Maybe,” he said, “She missed you, so she came to see you. And after seeing you all well adjusted with new friends and a job, she pretended to be happy so you wouldn’t think she isn’t over it.”

Scott brightened, “You think so?”

Derek laughed at Scott’s puppy dog face, “Yeah, I think so.”

“Heck yeah!” Scott thrust his fist in the air, throwing back the rest of his drink. Derek watched the scene. Suddenly, Scott looked over to him with narrowed eyes. “Oh my God. I forgot. I’m mad at you.”


“You didn’t tell me you have a giant dick!” he exclaimed, a few people near them looking over smirking.

“Scott!” Derek hissed.

“What you must know it’s true! It’s like five inches soft!”

Derek flushed, covering his crotch with his hands when Scott looked down at it. He looked around, seeing Stiles still talking merrily away with Allison, “Why were you looking at my dick?!”

“Well, I wasn’t! Not really, I just accidently walked in on you changing the other day at Stiles’ place, you know, after he spilled tomato sauce on your pants. And like, I didn’t mean to look, I just kinda peeked and it was right there!” Scott told him dramatically. Derek rubbed his temples. Right, and now that Scott had no filter, he felt the need to tell Derek about it. He prayed he hadn’t told Stiles.

Scott, not sensing the tension, continued, “I read people with dicks nine inches feel light headed when they get hard, does that happen to you?”

“Oh my God, Scott-“

“Does Stiles know he’s dating a horse? Get it, cause of your-“

“Yes, I get it thank you.”

“You should think about doing porn,” Derek choked on his spit, “I bet you’d get paid a ton of money doing that-“

“Derek!” Stiles threw himself onto Derek, pressing a sloppy kiss to Derek’s cheek. “I’m so glad you’re here.

“I am too,” Derek agreed, trying to silently communicate to Scott to keep his mouth shut.

“Why are you not drunk though?” Stiles put his hands on his hips, or attempted to from where he was sitting on the couch. “Derek it’s a party!”

“I’m having a beer,”

“Yeah, and that’s wrong you need to be wasted for this party to be complete,” Scott nodded along to his friends drunk logic.

“I don’t think that’s how it works.”

“You are so difficult, you know that,” Stiles pursed his lips at him.

“It’s good to know that you’ll never stop yelling at me, even when you’re drunk.”

Just as Stiles opened his mouth, no doubt to continue yelling at Derek, Scott cut him off, “Don’t worry Stiles I’m mad at Derek too. He didn’t tell anyone about his-“

“Stiles, I finally see what you mean about Scott being the Ross of your friends!” Derek rushed out, bulldozing Scott.

Stiles, drunk enough to not notice the distraction, laughed, “See! He’s totally Ross, I knew you’d get it!”

“I’m not Ross!” Scott cried indignantly.



Derek suppressed the urge to turn and slap the man next to him.

“You know,” he ground out, tucking himself back in his pants, “its kind of an unspoken rule to not look at other guys in the urinal.”

“I’m sorry, it’s just- your penis is huge!” exclaimed the guy next to him, scrambling to follow him out the bathroom.

Derek ignored him, beginning to walk back to where he and Stiles were seeing a movie.

“Are you a shower or a grower?” he heard the guy call as he turned into his theatre.

When he sat down, Stiles offered him popcorn without looking away from the screen. Derek kissed his cheek.


Derek grumbled, reaching for the phone on his bedside table which had been ringing incessantly. Without checking the called ID he pressed talk, “What.”

“Now that’s no way to greet your boyfriend.”

Derek groaned. “Stiles. It is three in the morning.”


Derek rolled over, “What do you want?”

“I’m outside your apartment as we speak. I want you to meet me outside.”

“Why would I do that?”

“Because I asked you to! Now come meet me, and wear all black!”

Dial tone.

I could go back to sleep right now. Derek thought.

He got up.

Stiles was bouncing on his heels when Derek left the building, dressed in black pants, a black hoodie and a black beanie pulled low on his head. When he saw him he scowled, “Derek! I told you to wear black!”

He looked down at his outfit, “I am?”

“No! That’s not black, it’s navy! See, look at your hoodie next to mine it’s all wrong!”

“It’s dark, what’s the difference?”

“Dark isn’t black! We need to be wearing black! Go back and change!”

“Stiles. It is almost three thirty in the morning in November. We live in New York City. It’s cold. I’m tired. If I go back up those stairs it is to go to bed.”

Stiles crossed his arms and shook his head, “Fine, wear navy. But now we can’t be stealthy since you’ve ruined it with your inability to listen to instructions.”

Choosing to ignore the end of Stiles rant, he asked, “Why do we need to be stealthy?”

“Because,” Stiles leaned in close to Derek, motioning for him to move in close, “We are going in. We have a job. And we need to be discreet about it.”

“A job?”

“Yes, precisely.” Stiles nodded, “It’s very important and very secret, so we must be incredibly sly tonight. No one can hear us, or see us. We must be merely a shadow tonight.”

Derek folded his arms, “Why are you talking in riddles?”

“Why are you wearing navy when we need to complete a job that requires utter stealthiness?” Stiles shot back, grabbing Derek’s arm and dragging him down the street. Derek looked back to his apartment longingly.

“Okay. I’ll give. What is this job?”

“As a patron of The Parlor for the entirety of our relationship, you know that we seem to have perpetual money troubles, do you not?”

“I do,”

“Well, despite our fiscal discrepancies, we have become a staple in the local community. And that staple is being threatened by the hulking beast that is Ben & Jerry’s.”

“Huh?” Derek asked, struggling to keep up with Stiles as he fast-walked down the sidewalk.

Stiles spun around to face Derek. He looked around suspiciously before he furiously whispered, “A Ben & Jerry’s opened up two blocks away from The Parlor!”

“Oh,” Derek murmured.

“Yeah, oh. This corporation is trying to steal our business! Ours! We’ve worked too hard for too long to sit idly by and watch our shop fall into the depths with every other failed local business!”

“So what are we going to do?”

Stiles smirked, grabbing Derek’s hand, “We are going to take a page out of twelve year old me’s handbook. We are going to egg the place.”


“Stiles, are you serious?” Derek asked half an hour later. Stiles dragged him on to the subway, all the way to Green Point. They stopped at a 24 hour gas station and picked up a carton of eggs. The whole time Derek tried to convince Stiles to think about what he was doing. Predictably, Stiles didn’t listen.

“Yes! Now come on,” Soon they were standing in front of the Ben & Jerry’s.

Derek looked to Stiles, “What will egging their store front even do? Do you think this is doing to scare them away? Because I got to tell you, I don’t think a few yolks are going to do that.”

“This isn’t about trying to get them to close. This is about principle. This is a warning. Letting them know they’ve encroached on our territory,” Stiles said seriously, glaring at the building.

“I don’t think they’re going to know that this is supposed to be a warning,” Derek pointed out. “They’ll probably just think it’s teenagers. Because that’s what teenagers do.”

“You’re right,” That was a sentence Derek never expected to hear, “I could see if I could write something in the yolk.” He mused.

“That’s the stupidest idea I’ve ever heard.”

“Oh excuse me, what’s your bright idea smarty pants.”

“My idea is to go home.” Derek dead-panned, “We can go to sleep in my nice warm bed, wake up late, eat some hot breakfast.”

Stiles closed his eyes, “Mmm, that sounds good.” Then, snapping out of it, “No! No. This has to be done, for the good of The Parlor.”

“Stiles, I am shivering. It is four in the morning.”

“You know, you are not the partner in crime I was hoping for on this stakeout,”

“So this is a stakeout now?”

“For The Parlor!” Stiles suddenly cried, grabbing an egg from the carton and hurling it at the front door.

They watched as the egg splattered against the door, yolk dripping down and pooling on the sidewalk.

Stiles turned to Derek slowly, “That was way less satisfying than I thought it’d be.” He grabbed another egg and held it out to Derek, “Want to try?”

Derek was about to decline when he heard a noise down the street. Turning towards it, he saw a cop started down the road, looking straight at them. “Hey, stay where you are!”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Derek mumbled.

Stiles quickly hid the egg carton behind his back, standing closer to Derek, “Be cool,” he hissed.

The cop pointed at the door, “Did you guys do that?”

Derek hesitated, looking to Stiles, who was opening his mouth and closing it. He knew that look. That was his, thinking-of-a-no-doubt-bad-excuse look. The cop was still looking stern, and after a second he grabbed his walkie talkie. Oh God, Derek thought. He was a grown man who was about to be arrested for egging a building.

“Yeah, we got an egging by two men-“ the cop said into his walkie talkie, turning to look at the building.

“Run!” A voice called, and as Derek grabbed Stiles’ hand and started running down the street, he realized it was him.

“Hey! Stop!” The cop yelled, running after them, but Stiles and Derek were too far ahead.

Stiles and Derek ran block after block, Stiles dropping the carton with a yell, “Get rid of the evidence!”

Derek barked out a laugh at that, and the situation, running through the streets like hooligans this late, hands linked between them like Bonnie and Clyde.

Fifteen blocks later when Derek was sure they’d lost the cop, he pulled them against the wall of a dimly lit building. Stiles was still laughing, tears streaming down his face from the hilarity and the wind. His eyes were bright, even in the dark, sparkling with mirth. His hat was askew, and his brown hair stuck out at all angles, blown from the wind. He looks beautiful.

Derek voiced this.

Stiles huffed out a laugh, looking at Derek adoringly, “I love you,” he breathed.

Derek froze, unsure he heard it right.

Stiles startled for a moment but then stood firm, but nervous. “I know it might be soon. No, i-it is soon. I know it’s only been two months and it’s-crazy. But.” Stiles swallowed and then smiled small at Derek, “But you never act like I’m this hyperactive burden. You let me talk to you about Star Wars for hours, and you talk me through panic attacks! You’re the only person who would get up at three in the morning in November just because I asked them to. You- You make me so happy, Derek.”

Derek stared at Stiles unable to believe what was happening. He couldn’t tell if Stiles’ tears were from the wind or something else anymore.

Stiles took his hat off and ran a hair through his wild hair, “Don’t feel like you have to say anything. I don’t want to you to try and make me feel better because you don’t feel the same way yet, I just needed to say it. I love you.”

Derek didn’t give Stiles the chance to feel insecure, pulling Stiles into his chest hard. He tucked his face into Stiles shoulder, smiling so hard his cheeks hurt.


Derek pulled back and kissed Stiles hard on the mouth. Stiles moaned into it as Derek licked his way across Stiles teeth, savoring the taste of this man. The man he loved. He leaned back slowly, resting his forehead against Stiles’ “I love you too.”

Stiles looked at Derek, shocked, “What? Don’t, please don’t just say this because you feel bad, or don’t want it to be awkward. I don’t need you to say it for those reasons,”

Derek shook his head, grinning “Why do you always need to argue with me on everything? I love you, deal with it.”

Stiles broke out into a bright beam, “Okay,” he whispered, intertwining his fingers with Derek’s. “I’m so glad to hear you say that.”

They stood there for moments after, under the street lamps, woven together, and in love.


Since admitting to loving Stiles, Derek’s life had been like a dream. He’d remember it randomly in the day, and then grin like an idiot. Boyd told him. He and Stiles went on dates still, but it was different. Everything seemed more intimate, more important, more exciting now that they were in love. It was like a completely different state they were in, and it was exhilarating.

“Okay I’m going,” Isaac said, slipping on his coat and throwing on a scarf.

“Alright, see you bright and early tomorrow, soldier.” Stiles saluted, from where he was spread out, sitting across Derek like a chair. Derek chuckled, kissing Stiles behind his ear.

Isaac watched the exchange with indifference, so Derek called that a win. “Whatever, don’t forget to lock up.”

“When do I ever?”

“Bye Isaac.” Derek tried, not surprised when Isaac simply turned and left.

Stiles turned in Derek’s lap, “See, he likes you, that was the least amount of distaste I’ve seen him display towards you ever!”

“I don’t think that translates to him liking me,”

“Well, maybe not. But close!” Stiles waved him off, “Anyway, we have much more important things to discuss!”

“Like?” Derek prompted.

“Like how Ben & Jerry’s did not take to our threat and is still operating down the street, taking all of our customers!”

“I’ve seen the same people coming in all week,” Derek pointed out.

“Yes, but usually we at least get one new person every month or something to get a little more business. With them taking all our potential customers we have no extra revenue; we could barely get by when did have it,” Stiles sighed.

“Stiles, you know I wouldn’t mind-“


“C’mon, you know I have the money-“

“I’m not taking your money,” he said firmly, laying his head against Derek’s shoulder. “I love you for offering, but I can’t take it.”

They sat quietly for a few moments.

“Okay, get up,” Derek ordered after a moment, sliding Stiles’ off him. “Grab your jacket, we’re leaving.”

“Where are we going?” Stiles questioned, though slipping into his jacket.

Derek took Stiles’ hand after he put on his jacket, “To cheer you up. I know a place close by,”

“So you think you can just ply me with sweets and I’ll feel better about my failing business?” Stiles narrowed his eyes at Derek as they went out the door of The Parlor, remembering to lock up.

“You are like a two year old in a lot of ways.”


The two of them walked out on the sidewalk side by side, colored lights illuminating the street.

“I can’t believe they’re decorating for Christmas already,”

“It’s never to early for Christmas!” Stiles shouted, earning looks from others on the street. Derek regarded him fondly.

Soon they arrived at the bakery, and Stiles enthusiastically ordered a cannoli while Derek got an éclair. When he finished handing cash to the cashier, he turned around to see Stiles standing behind him with powdered sugar covering his mouth. It looked delicious.

“You finished your cannoli.” It wasn’t a question.

Stiles nodded sheepishly.

Derek sighed and ordered him another cannoli.

On the way out, full and content, Stiles plastered himself against Derek’s arm, “So you were right I do feel better.”

“How did I know that?” Derek rolled his eyes.

“I love you,” and God did Derek love hearing that.

“I love you too,” he pointed in front of them, “Here, let’s go through this alley, it’s a shortcut,”

“Okay,” Stiles agreed, and wow that was new.

They walked down the alley in a rare comfortable silence, listening to the sounds of the city around them. As they continued, however, Derek noticed one of the buildings ahead of them had it’s side door open and lit, workers running food back and forth between a truck they appeared to be unloading. As they got closer, it started to snow lightly down onto them, except it wasn’t snow. It was the bakery’s powdered sugar.

“Oh my God!” Stiles laughed, holding his hands out as powdered sugar rained down, surrounding them like mist, “It’s like Gone Girl!”

Derek smiled, holding out a hand and letting the sugar coat his arm. Looking back up, Stiles had his head tilted back, tongue out and catching the sugar on it like snowflakes. His eyes were lidded, and Derek could see his eyelashes sparkling from the powder.

He’d never been so in love in his life.

Stepping closer, he turned Stiles towards him, wiping the sugar off his cheeks and leaving his hand there to gently caress him.

“You know, if this is like Gone Girl that means pretty soon I’m going to frame you for murder,” Stiles smiled up at him, running his hands up Derek’s chest.

“Then I guess I’ll have to do this quick,” Derek murmured before taking Stiles’ face between his hands and kissing him slow and gentle. His lips tasted of sugar and the gum he’d been chewing.

The kisses quickly turned heated, and Stiles let out a broken off moan, leaning back from the kiss. “My apartments really close if you- I mean-“

Stiles tried to explain what he meant but Derek already knew exactly what he meant. He was an ex porn star, he knew codes for sex when he heard them. Stiles wanted to fuck. And for the first time, he was ready too. He loved Stiles.

He kissed Stiles softly, “Lead the way.”

They walked to Stiles’ apartment slowly, taking their times to stop against buildings and kiss languidly.

Derek molded himself to Stiles’ back, his erection going between Stiles’ clothed ass cheeks. It felt so good to have the friction he’d so vehemently denied himself their whole relationship. He was still nervous, but he loved Stiles.

And he really, really wanted to fuck him.

Stiles moaned brokenly, dropping the keys twice as Derek ground into him from behind. Derek growled and grabbed them the third time, shoving them into the door and unlocking it himself.

The two practically sprinted to the elevator, Stiles blindly pushing his floor as Derek caged him in against the wall. He grabbed Stiles wrists and slammed them above his head, nipping and sucking under Stiles’ ear. He pushed his erection into Stiles’, reveling in the feeling of Stiles shuttering. Though only an inch or so taller than him, Derek seemed to tower over Stiles, dominating his mouth as he continued to grind and rub against the younger man.

“O-oh God, Derek!” Stiles whined beneath him.

Next time I’ll make love to him Derek thought idly, as he let go of Stiles’ wrists to finally grab that fat ass. He knew he was being rough, but he couldn’t help himself. He was a dominant guy in the sac on a normal day. Here, with Stiles, so responsive, and so eager, the man he loved, he just needed that physical connection he’d gone so long without.

When the elevator opened with a ding, Stiles dragged Derek out by the hand hastily, breathing heavily, the bruise already forming under his ear. Fumbling with his keys a second time, Stiles unlocked the door quickly and wrenched it open.

Derek slammed it closed behind him, grabbing Stiles and pulling him in for a filthy kiss, tongue probing into Stiles open mouth. Stiles’ hand wormed down the his crotch, palming the base of Derek’s dick, moaning.

“Bedroom,” Stiles huffed out when he pulled back from the kiss, “Now.”

Derek nodded, taking his shirt off swiftly. Stiles stared at his torso for a second, entranced. “Yeah. Bedroom, immediately.”

They ran to the bedroom, Stiles shedding his shirt and pants along the way. When they reached the bed Stiles wound his arms around Derek’s neck, launching in for a kiss with such force he took them both down.

Derek fell onto his back on the bed, Stiles on top of him sloppily kissing with a leg on either side of Derek. Derek slipped his hands under Stiles’ boxers and squeezed his bare cheeks, tracing a finger between them. Stiles shuddered and ground down on top of Derek.

Stiles pulled back from the kiss and nuzzled against Derek’s beard briefly before sucking at Derek’s throat.

Derek panted, so hard it strained against his pants. It dawned on him that Stiles’ would likely see his dick tonight. The Moment of Truth his brain thought deliriously. He didn’t have much time to reflect and get nervous when Stiles squeezed the base of his cock again. Stiles licked over the hickey he left on Derek’s throat.

“Now we’re matching,” he breathed, grinning down at Derek with dilated eyes.

“Shut up,” Derek snorted.

“God, you’re so hot. How are you so hot? Look at your chest.” Stiles moaned, going back down to lick across Derek’s pecs. He sucked his nipple into his mouth and Derek stuttered in his massage of Stiles’ ass. Moving down to his stomach, Stiles licked at Derek’s abs like a kitten, paying attention to every grove that protruded when Derek sucked in a gasp.

Stiles paused at Derek’s belt, leaning back to undo the buckle and pull it out of his pant loops, only struggling a little. When he undid Derek’s button and zipper he looked Derek in the eye, “I’m going to suck your dick forever,”

Derek huffed another laugh, bringing Stiles back down for a kiss, “My boyfriend the romantic.”

Stiles wasted no time yanking Derek’s pants and underwear down to his thighs leaving Derek exposed for the first time.

“Whoa,” Stiles breathed.

When Derek was doing porn his resume went like this:

Derek Hale. Height: 6’2” Weight: 165lbs. Penis length: 8.9 inches. Penis Girth: 5.6 inches.

This was a reaction he was used to.

Stiles stared at his dick in awe, “It’s bigger than I imagined.” Then he leaned down to lick a long strip on the underside of his cock, from base to tip. He went back to lick the entirety of the vein on the side of his cock, making Derek shudder. Stiles swirled his tongue along the tip, using both of his hands to grip Derek’s shaft. Derek had a moment to prepare before Stiles took a deep breath and took his dick into his mouth.

Derek let his head fall back, moaning at the hot, wet feeling enveloping his dick. He watched Stiles, mouth stretched wide to accommodate his girth and lips a cherry red. If he wasn’t already hard and aching, this would be all it took. Stiles closed his eyes in concentration (So cute Derek thought) and sunk lower on Derek’s dick, almost getting more than half in his mouth before he appeared to gag, pulling off to cough delicately.

“Hey, hey don’t go too fast.” Derek soothed, still frustratingly hard. Stiles hands hadn’t let the base of his cock.

“Sorry, I-“ Stiles looked slightly shy, “I haven’t done this much,”

Derek resisted the urge to fist pump at that. “Just take it slow.”

Stiles nodded, looking determined, it was very cute. He leaned back down, taking Derek’s dick between his lips again. His time he went slower, more carefully. His tongue dragged along the underside of Derek’s dick, over and over and over. Derek groaned, fisting his hand in Stiles hair as Stiles took him deeper. Derek felt the sensitive tip of his dick tickly Stiles’ throat when he was about two thirds of the way down.

Stiles circled his fist around the part of his dick that he couldn’t reach, flashing his eyes up to watch Derek. Derek moaned, taking in Stiles, stretched around his cock with spit on the sides of his cheeks, looking up at him for confirmation.

“Good boy,” Derek breathed, and Stiles moaned softly around his dick, beginning to bob up and down the shaft.

That was all it took. Minutes, hell it could have been seconds, later Derek came with a grunt, shooting out into Stiles’ mouth. Stiles swallowed as much as he could, coughing again when he pulled off as some cum stuck to his cheek, erotically.

Derek couldn’t help himself, he pushed the blob into Stiles’ mouth with his thumb, watching hypnotized as Stiles grabbed his wrist to suck on Derek’s finger. He leaned in to bite at Stiles’ lower lip, licking into his mouth hurriedly.

“Was that good?” Stiles whispered when they pulled back.

“I came faster than when I was a teenager, I’d say that’s pretty good,” Derek confirmed, he reached down to Stiles boxers and palmed at Stiles’ dick.

“Oh God,” Stiles moaned brokenly, falling forward. Derek sat up to catch him, holding Stiles with one arm and reaching into his underwear with the other. Derek grabbed Stiles’ dick with a firm hand and worked him quickly and roughly, Stiles whining steadily.

Stiles came moaning Derek’s name and it was the best sound he’d ever heard.

They grabbed tissues from Stiles’ side table and cleaned themselves off. Derek slid off his pants and underwear, Stiles doing the same with his underwear, and curled under the blankets next to each other.

“I want you to fuck me tonight,” Stiles said yawning, not noticing he’d short circuited Derek’s brain. “Not now though, you’ve broken me.”

Derek chuckled, pressing a kiss to the top of Stiles head. They sat quietly for a while, coming down from the high, and breathing heavily. Once they calmed down Stiles turned on his side and pressed closer to Derek.

“You’re dick is so big, I knew it would be, but it’s so much better in person than in my fantasies,” Stiles sighed, snuggling up into Derek’s chest. Derek looked down to Stiles. Wait, in person? Derek thought. Why did he say it like that?

“Seriously Derek, no wonder they call you the king.”

Derek froze. The King.

Stiles knew.

He called his the king. The title he’d gotten bestowed on him by the porn industry. No wonder they call you the king. There was no mistaking that. Stiles knew. All this time, and Derek had thought it was different.

“Get off me,” he croaked. His voice sounded far away, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. All he could think, over and over, was I let it happen again.

“Uh-uh, you’re comfy,” Stiles smiled, not sensing the tension.

“Get the fuck off of me,” Derek growled, shoving Stiles to the side and throwing back the blanket.

“Derek! What the hell?” Stiles said angrily, sitting up in his bed. Anger quickly turned to confusion. “What’s wrong?”

Derek said nothing, he was too angry. He grabbed his pants, forgoing his underwear to shove his legs into the pants.

“Derek, what?” Stiles asked again, kneeling on the bed and moving closer to Derek.

He reached out to touch him, only to have Derek jerk back away from him. He looked at him like he was crazy, “Derek, what’s wrong? What happened?”

“What happened?” Derek asked savagely, buttoning his pants. “I’m fucking done, that’s what.”

Stiles looked stricken, “What? What do you mean you’re done?”

Derek ignored Stiles shaky voice, too angry to give a shit. “I mean I’m done.”

Stiles shook his head, at a loss, “Derek we can talk about whatever’s bothering you. Just tell me the truth why are you so upset?”

Derek put on his shirt quickly, zipping up his jacket after. “What the fuck would you know about truth?” He grit out, stomping out of the room.

He heard Stiles stumble out after him, “Wait! Wait Derek what are you-“

“Lose my number,” he said before he slammed the front door behind him.


“Hey- Hey man you’re-“

“Derek Hale, yeah and I got a big fucking dick, fuck off!” Derek roared, causing the two men on the street to stare at him wide eyed.


Derek sat in his room, shades drawn to keep the room dark. He’d called in sick that morning, unable to face anyone after what had happened. He was enraged the whole night. He wanted to punch someone. Stiles, who he’d been so sure was real, was fake. Like everyone else. Just a fan of his obsessed enough with his dick to pretend to love him for two months. Every time he thought maybe he’d overreacted he thought about what Stiles said, and thought no way what he said could have been a coincidence.

However, after a night of anger, his rage slowly slid to a bleak despair. Derek could never remember being so sad. Stiles didn’t like him, he wanted him. Derek wanted to be sexually desired, but after years of sex being the only the about him that mattered, he craved more. He thought he’d found that with Stiles. He’d ended up crying into his pillow that night. Feeling Worthless. Used.

His phone rang and he groaned. His phone had been going off all morning, just his luck on the day he didn’t want human contact.

After the third time his phone rang he reluctantly answered, “Hello?”

“Derek!” Laura. Great. He loved his sister but she’d know something was wrong and no doubt force him to talk about it.

“Hi, Laura. Listen I really can’t talk-“

“Sh! I have great news!”

Derek rubbed his eyes. He didn’t really want to hear how well other people’s lives were going when he felt like his had just crumbled in front of him. But he wasn’t going to punish his sister because he was angry. “What is it?”

“Me and Cora are both off this weekend! So, we can come down and meet Stiles!”

Derek felt like he’d swallowed ash.

“Isn’t that great? So we can come down Friday night, maybe get some drinks and then Saturday we can invite Erica and Boyd along-“

“Laura, we broke up.” He cut her off.

“What?” Laura asked softer.

“We broke up.”


“Last night,” he admitted quietly.

Laura was quiet on the other side.

“I’m so sorry,” she said after a while.

“I know,” he said, laying back down with his phone. “Me too.”

Later, in the evening, long after he and Laura finished talking, he heard his door being banged on. He really didn’t want to leave the blanket cocoon he was in the entire day.

When he finally got up and answered the door he wasn’t surprised seeing Erica and Boyd. Erica gathered him up in a hug. He made a soft, questioning noise.

“Laura told us. We’ve got movies, don’t worry.” She said, smiling sadly at him.


Derek managed to successfully avoid Stiles for five days. He ignored Erica’s calling him a coward for not seeing Stiles’ side of things, to give him a chance to defend himself, and Derek a sense of closure. Boyd’s judgy looks at work were harder to avoid but he dealt.

The hardest though, were the calls from Stiles. Stiles hadn’t stopped calling and texting Derek since that night. His emotions see-sawing between anger and extreme sadness, he deleted all his messages before reading and ignored his calls.

“Just go talk to him,” Boyd shook his head, sitting next to Derek in their break room at work.

“I don’t want to speak to him,” Derek responded sullenly.

“Yes you do,” Boyd said.

Derek stayed silent, laying his head on to the break table.

“So, you really think he knew this whole time?” Boyd tried instead.

“Yes. He said he wanted to see my dick in person and called me the king. There’s no way that was a coincidence.” Derek said dully.

Hours later, when Derek was run ragged from being badgered by Boyd all day at work, he walked slowly to his apartment. He wasn’t that shocked to see Stiles waiting at his doorstep.

“How did you get in the building?” he asked when he walked up to the younger man.

“I brought two shopping bags with me and one of your neighbors let me in,” Stiles admitted quietly.

Stiles did not look good. His eyes had new, deep bags under them, and looked red and glassy. His hair was flat against his head, and Derek thought it looked un-washed. Mostly though, Stiles looked heartbroken.

What a fucking joke that was.

“Nice,” Derek muttered, shouldering past Stiles to unlock his door. “Now leave.”

“Derek, please, I just want to talk,” Stiles pleaded, following Derek inside.

“So, talk,” Derek leaned back against his kitchen counter, looking at Stiles fidget.

“I-“ Stiles began, biting his lip. “I want to know what the hell Derek? What the fuck happened that night? One second we’re happy and kissing and the next you freak out for no reason!”

Derek scoffed, “You know the reason,”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, Derek!” Stiles exploded, throwing his hands up, “I don’t know what happened, you just got mad for no reason! And then you don’t talk to me, you just ignore me for days after.”

“Stop lying!” Derek slammed his hand down on his counter, making Stiles jump. “It’s over Stiles I know, okay! So stop with this fucking act.”

“It’s not an act! I’m not lying, what are you even talking about?!”

“I’m talking about how you knew I was in fucking porn!” Derek yelled.

Stiles opened his mouth, seemingly stunned. “Huh? You did-“

“Yes, so I know. You can stop acting so fucking dumb now.”

“Derek, I-“ Stiles shook his head desperately, “I don’t know what to say. I didn’t know that but I don’t know what the fuck that has to do with me?”

“You fucking knew from the start! You knew that and you pretended to have no idea who I was. You used me to see what it was like to be fucked by a real live porn star!” Derek yelled, letting all the emotions pour out after days of trying to suppress them.

“No I didn’t, I didn’t know that you were in porn! I found out two seconds ago!”

“Was it worth it Stiles, was it everything you hoped it would be?” He asked cruelly, stepping closer to Stiles.


“Did I give it to like you wanted, was I just like you thought it’d be?” Derek sneered, grabbing Stiles shoulders and backing him to the wall, a sick parallel to the night days before.

“What are you doing?” Stiles cried, trying to shake Derek off, but he wasn’t budging, not today. His eyes shone, looking wet as Derek continued to push him.

“You wanted me to fuck you? Is that what you wanted, for me to be rough with you,”


"Cause we can be rough baby, real rough if that's what you want."

“Stop it!” Stiles shoved him off of him, tears streaming down his face openly. “Stop it! Why are you being so cruel? Derek, I swear I didn’t-“

“Just shut the fuck up. For once, shut the fuck up.” Derek shook his head, pushing himself away from Stiles and turning his back to the shaking younger man.

“You know what Derek,” Stiles said shakily. His voice was quiet and serious. “If you think I could do that- use you like I’m such a cold asshole, then clearly you think very little of me.”

Derek didn’t turn, even when he heard Stiles hiccup. “I thought you really loved me. But I just keep getting these things wrong.” Derek bit on to his lip, pained to hear the soft steps of Stiles towards the door.

“Goodbye, Derek.”


Two days later, Derek felt like an idiot, sitting on the bench down the block from The Parlor with a newspaper blocking his face, looking for Stiles in the shop.

He knew he was pathetic. Stiles used him. He wanted to have sex with him only and got upset when he was caught. But Derek was still in love with him, he couldn’t turn those feelings off. It was like this after Kate too. He missed for days after, even though he knew she was an evil woman.

It was so much worse with Stiles though.

Derek lowered the paper, looking through the windows of the ice cream shop, seeing Stiles inside, wearing his stupid paper hat, looking cute as ever. Derek grumbled, of course he still looked fucking delectable. And ever since Derek had hooked up with Stiles it was all he thought about. He even jacked off in the shower a few times thinking of it, hitting himself shamefully for it after.

Inside the shop Stiles turned around and went out of Derek line of sight, Scott walking to the front of the place. He had a spray bottle and a rag, and after talking for a second, began to clean the windows. Isaac walked next to him and began cleaning tabled.

Derek sighed looking down to his watch. It was only four. He could go home and watch the evening news, take a long hot shower and go to bed early if he left then. It would be like his schedule before he met Stiles. He did that for months. He didn’t know why it suddenly sounded so dull.

Looking back up, Derek startled. Shit. Scott and Isaac were staring right at him. There was no mistaking who they were looking at. They looked furious. Derek folded the paper violently and shoved it into his bag. He zipped up his bag and threw it over his shoulder. Straightening up he jumped seeing Isaac and Scott standing feet from him.

“What? How did you get here so fast?” He huffed exasperatedly at them.

“You have a lot of nerve to come here after what you did to Stiles,” Scott growled.

“After what I did? You’re kidding.”

“Yeah after what you did, you broke up with Stiles out of nowhere and then when he tries to see what happened you freak out worse than his ex-boyfriend ever did!” Scott fumed.

“I am not like him,” Derek growled.

“Really, cause from where I’m standing it looks pretty damn similar.”

Derek was about to fire back when Isaac spoke for the first time, “Scott. Go back inside.”

“No, I’m giving this bastard a piece of my-“

Scott! If Stiles sees we’re both gone he’s going to come out and see him. We both know that’s not good, now go.”

Scott stomped away, leaving Isaac and Derek alone.

Derek sighed, “Isaac-“

“I knew who you were.

“What?” Derek asked confused.

He watched as Isaac sat down on the bench he’d just vacated, reaching into his jacket and pulling out a pack of cigarettes. He put one between his lips and lit it quickly, the smoke filling the frigid air.

“I said,” Isaac dragged from his cigarette, “that I knew who you were. Derek Hale. Porn star, I recognized you the day you came in, and when I saw the name on your license I knew it was you. Kind of weird that you used your real name, but I digress.”

“Yeah, I fucking know you guys knew who I was.”

“I was worried about you and Stiles because of it. Afraid you were some kind of sex fiend. Guess I didn’t have to worry about that though, you were just an asshole.”

“How am I the asshole? Did he even tell you what happened or are you just covering for him because of your fucked up sense of guilt?”

Isaac’s eyes hardened, “He told me you freaked out for no reason and then after he confronted you, you shoved him around a little. Just like his ex did. At least he had the drug excuse.”

Derek scowled, “You don’t get to fucking judge me when you three probably laughed about how Stiles was going to bang a porn star. He was using me and you knew, as far as I’m concerned you guys aren’t worth shit.”

“Wait,” Isaac put out his cigarette and looked to Derek in disbelief, “You think Stiles was with you because you did porn?! God, you are an idiot.”

“Yeah, I am, for not noticing sooner,” Derek made a move to walk away but Isaac grabbed his shoulder and pulled him back roughly, looking furious.

“Stiles never fucking knew! I was the only one who made the connection.”

“Bullshit,” Derek scoffed, wrenching his arm out of Isaac’s grasp. “I’m called the fucking King. I dominated the porn industry for years, online and on DVDs, people fucking recognize me on the streets! I got a famous dick," he sneered, "So excuse me for not buying your bullshit.”

Isaac looked enraged, but before he could say anything Derek walked away. He didn’t look back.


Derek was sitting on his couch days later, wallowing with a bag of Cheetos and an Indiana Jones marathon when someone pounded on his door.

He looked up at the noise, then back down to himself. He was sitting in his boxers, cheese-stained, and his bread was long and straggly from days of not shaving. Probably Erica, he internally groaned, not ready for another lecture on how he should talk to Stiles for closure or some other nonsense. He was considering just pretending he wasn’t home when the pounding sounded again, only louder.

“Derek! Derek, you fucking asshole, I know you’re in there, open the goddamn door!” a voice called from outside, and Derek really groaned that time. He knew that voice.


Derek sighed, shaking his head and grabbing the remote to turn the volume up. Let him scream himself hoarse for all I care. The knocking continued steadily for five minutes, Derek deliberately ignoring Isaac’s yells and pounding, bitterly shoving more Cheetos in his mouth.

“Derek Hale come to the door right now you fucking coward, I know you’re here I saw your car out front and I’m not leaving. In fact maybe I’ll just go pay your little Camaro a visit, introduce her to my keys! I’m sure she’ll-“

The wall next to Derek’s apartment suddenly slammed, “Hey! Shut the fuck up over there, no one gives a shit!” his neighbor yelled through the wall, and Derek let his head fall back onto the couch as Isaac screams back, because of course, of course, he couldn’t take one day to relax. He irritably shoved the bowl of Cheetos onto the table and wiped his hands before getting up.

“I don’t think I was talking to you, asshole!”

“If you don’t knock it off I’ll go out there and kick your goofy ass!”

“Oh I’d love to see you-“

Derek wrenched open his front door to reveal Isaac, dressed casually with his jacket undone and a backpack slung over his shoulders, yelling through the wall, hand poised up ready to bang again. “What?!” Derek asked savagely.

Isaac looked back at him, eyeing his stained boxers and one socked foot with clear distaste. “Glad to see you’re doing well.” He pushed passed Derek and stomped into his apartment.

Isaac stopped in kitchen, looking out to where Derek had been nestled minutes ago, the TV droning quietly, clothes littered everywhere haphazardly, “Nice place,”

“Cut the shit, Isaac,” Derek said, slamming the door shut, “What the fuck are you doing here?”

“I’m here,” Isaac shot back, “to tell you that you’re a fucking idiot, and to tell you that Stiles is miserable because you made stupid fucking assumptions.”

“Well that’s just too bad, sorry I had to ruin his fantasy before he got to live it out,” Derek ground out.

“You’re a real son of a bitch, you know that? You don’t have a fucking clue what’s really going on.”

“What’s going on,” Derek grunted, feeling his anger rebuild in him, “is that your little brother used me to see my cock, like every fucking person that acts like they want to date me!”

“No he wasn’t!” Isaac exploded, “Look, you can have your fucking sob story, go ahead, but the bottom line is Stiles is wrecked right now and it’s your fault! He’s unhappy, he’s hurt!”

“Oh, poor Stiles, what, is he sad he can’t take a ride on Derek Dick? Upset that I bruised his poor little ego by cutting his fucking fantasy short?” Derek yelled cruelly, mean in a way he hadn’t been in years, but unable to stop the anger, “Sorry, I’ll make sure to send written apologies to all the people I cut loose before they got a chance to see if fucking a porn star is all it’s cracked up to be.”

Isaac slammed his hand down on Derek’s counter, drawing Derek back from his blow-up. “He didn’t know you were in porn! Stiles never knew you were anyone but the guy he met at his ice cream shop! Stiles wasn’t fucking using you to get to your monster cock, he was in a relationship with you! He liked you, he didn’t have any idea you used to fuck for a living!”


“What are you talking about?” Derek asked, confused.

“He doesn’t watch porn, you fucking dick-head!” Isaac exploded, hands going up wildly, “He’s never watched porn online, or DVDs, or whatever grimy fucking medium you ‘conquered’” he sneered, air-quoting the word like it disgusted him.

Derek shook his head, raising his eyebrow, “What twenty two year old guy has never watched porn?”

“Stiles! Stiles hasn’t, because he’s a fucking weirdo! He’s never watched porn, he only reads erotic gay novels, or some shit, because he thinks it’s more authentic that way.” Isaac ground out.

“Bullshit! Fuck you, no, fuck you both, that’s bullshit, who would do that?” Derek shot back, waving Isaac off. He turned and slammed open some kitchen cabinets, looking for alcohol. “Tell Stiles he should have come up with a better fucking excuse,” God, he needed a drink. He couldn’t deal with all Isaac’s bullshit. Stiles couldn’t even come to apologize for using him himself, couldn’t man up and say ‘Hey, sorry, but only pretended to like you cause I knew your dick was huge and wanted to get a first hand look’. Nope, he had to send Isaac to do his dirty work and lie for him.

He was busy pulling out a handle of bourbon when something whipped into the back of his head. Slapping his hand to the back of his head, Derek spun around to see Isaac glaring back fiercely. He looked down to the floor, seeing a small paperback book lying on the ground.

Crouching, he picked up the novel and rose back up. He squinted at the title. Tangled Heat. The letters swirled and looped large at the top of the cover, an image of a steamed mirror with two men intertwined placed under it.

“What is this?” he asked.

“It’s one of Stiles’ books,” said Isaac cruelly, “Had a feeling you wouldn’t believe me, so I stole one of them from his book-case. Thought this might put your bloated fucking ego to rest.”

Derek breathed in disbelief, flipping the book to the back cover. Thomas has always lived a privileged life, free of stress, but when tough-Texan rancher Luke comes into his life, will he choose the life with a man he feels an uncontrollable draw to, or the life he had planned to have from the start?

“If it sounds pretentious and stupid, it probably is, but, hey, what can you expect from the guy that likes gay erotica?” Isaac said annoyed.

Derek reeled skimming over the summary again and again, fight leaving him as dread settled heavy in the pit of his belly. “He doesn’t watch porn?” he croaked, returning his attention to the blond, “Never has, not any? Never?”

Isaac sneered at him, fight seemingly leaving him too as he saw Derek’s deflation, “No, he never has.”

“So he really had no idea who I was?”

“Nope, he had no clue.”

Derek had trouble breathing. He sucked in a ragged breath, placing the book on his counter. Stiles didn’t know. Stiles didn’t know. Stiles didn’t fucking know. Derek blindly reached for the counter, suddenly feeling light headed. He gripped the counter tightly, facing away from Isaac. It made sense, suddenly, why Stiles never let Derek look on his bookshelf, and got all flustered when Derek asked what books he had. He was fucking embarrassed.

The pieces were coming together, and he felt ill. Derek had never seen any reaction or recognition in Stiles’ eyes, Stiles had never known why people on the street reacted so weirdly to him, never referenced his videos, or his dick, before that night. Stiles had never done anything but care for Derek, and he’d thrown that all back in his face because Stiles had made one comment.

Derek turned, sinking down until he sat on the floor, Isaac standing over him silently putting Stiles’ book back in his bag.

“I-“ he sucked in another breath, “I broke up with him because he had- he’d said something and it just sounded like he knew what I used to do- and I mean, I had never told him-“ Derek squeezed his eyes shut, running a hand over his face, “I just thought that he had always known me, and who I was, and what I looked like, and- and that he’d just been sticking it out for months so he could be with the guy that was in all those videos.”

Isaac regarded him evenly.

Derek looked away, huffing a bitter laugh before mumbling, “Wouldn’t have been the first time that happened.”

“Look,” Isaac sighed, after some time, running a hand through his curls, “I don’t know what made you flip like you did, but whatever fucked up groupie exes you’ve had, they aren’t Stiles.”

“I know,” Derek agreed miserably. “I know they’re not, I know- Stiles would never have done that, he isn’t like that, I just, I got so caught up in him being ignorant of it all, of him not expecting anything, that when I thought he was,” he trailed off.

“Stiles never expected anything of you, except for you to treat him right.”

Derek swallowed, nodding. He could feel his eyes getting wet thinking about how bad he’d fucked up. He’d found the perfect guy and he’d fucked it all up. He made Stiles miserable. Isaac told him that. He did that. Him. Not Stiles, not crazy-obsessed fans, him.

“I messed up, Isaac. I messed up bad.”

“You did.” Isaac nodded.

“I’m an asshole.”

“A huge one.”

“Stiles was the best thing that ever happened to me, and ruined all of that by making him feel like he did something, when I was just insecure,” Derek moaned into his hands.

“About your monster cock,” Isaac hummed thoughtfully.

Derek nodded uneasily. They sat in silence, the two of them, for moments, the air unnaturally quiet after their shouting match. Tension melted away, leaving them bared of all ammunition against each other.

After few quiet moments, Derek cleared his throat, wiping at his misted eyes. “I- um, look, I’m so fucking sorry. For everything I said to him, and for making him feel like this.” Looking up pleadingly at Isaac, he asked, “I know you hate me, and I have no right, but can you tell Stiles that I never meant for him to get hurt, and if- if I could take it all back I would. Please, just let tell him that.”

“Tell him yourself.”

Derek looked at Isaac incredulously, “What?

“Look, Derek, it’s no secret I don’t like you. I think you’re a fucking douche-bag. Like, a huge prick, absolutely awful, terrible just-“ Isaac trailed off looking back at Derek. He shook himself, “But I love my little brother, and for some bizarre reason, he really loves you. So if getting some jackass ex-porn star back together with him will make him smile again, well then, I’m gonna fucking swallow my thoughts on the moron and haul his dumb ass back over to Stiles.”

Derek was at a loss for words, opening and closing his mouth confused until Isaac took pity on him, walking back in front of him and crouching down to his level.

“I came here today to show you that Stiles didn’t know anything about your past and maybe kick your ass a little. But mostly, I wanted to knock some fucking sense into you because everyone could see you guys had full on heart eyes when it came to each other. And coming over, seeing you and this,” he gestured to Derek’s dirty appearance and apartment, “shows me that as much of a dick as you are, you care about my little brother a lot, and you’re just as miserable without him as he is without you. So can you do everyone a favor and go beg Stiles to take you back already?”

Derek shook his head, light headed with everything that happened, “No I can’t, he’s- I was an asshole to him, I treated him like shit, he’d never take me back after that.”

Isaac gave him a small, dry smile, rising back up and walking towards Derek’s door, “Yeah, he will, because you’re you, and he’s crazy about you. That doesn’t mean you don’t have to woo the shit out of him, but he will. I’d start by cleaning your place and taking a fucking shower so you don’t kill him with your God awful stench.”

Isaac opened Derek’s door, stopping before closing it to turn his head and add, “Oh and Derek? If you pull shit like this again on Stiles, I’ll take that dick you’re so famous for, and choke you with it.”

Derek blew out an exhale, smiling somewhat fondly as the door slammed. “I wouldn’t expect anything less.”

Knocking on Stiles’ door the next day he felt nervous. He’d showered and shaved after Isaac had left, and cleaned his apartment. He couldn’t go see Stiles that day, he didn’t have the courage yet, but he could do something.

“Coming!” Stiles muffled voice called from inside and Derek wiped his sweaty palms on his pants.

The door opened swiftly and for a few moments they just stared.

Stiles did not look good. His hair flopped on his head, looking greasy. He was wearing an oversized police academy sweatshirt and only his boxers. The worst was his face though, Stiles’ wide mouth turned down, under his red rimmed eyes. He looked like he hadn’t been sleeping.

“Derek?” he croaked after a minute, “What are you doing here?”

“Can I come in?”

Stiles hesitated for a second before stepping back and opening the door wider. Derek stepped in, feeling even more guilty seeing the state of Stiles’ apartment. Spotless. His normally messy apartment had been scrubbed and cleaned until practically sterile. He only cleaned when he was upset.

Derek went inside and sat gently onto Stiles’ armchair, waiting until the younger man sat in the couch next to him.

“I’m sorry,” Derek blurted. “I’m so sorry about what happened when you came to my place. That I didn’t listen to you, and that- that I was so-“ he trailed off, unsure of what to say.

Stiles was looking at him with a heartbreaking expression, and Derek needed to do something, to explain.

“I used to do porn,” he tried after minutes of silence.

“I know,” Derek looked up sharply, so Stiles hurried to explain, “After you said that, at your apartment. I looked you up.” He flushed awkwardly.

“Yeah.” Derek swallowed, “It’s just- a lot of people had only been with me because of that, or because my-um, size, was enough to make them stay. They didn’t like who I was, but they stayed with me anyway.”

Stiles stayed quiet, listening.

“That night,” Derek ground out, guilt crushing him when Stiles flinched at it’s mention. “Stiles it was the best night of my life. I-I loved it and I loved- I love you! When we were laying down after, you said that now you knew why I was called the king and, like, that my dick was worth the wait or something.”

Derek took a deep breath. Stiles still hadn’t said anything.

“You had never seen my penis, so when you said that-“

“You thought I’d seen it before and knew what it looked like-“ Stiles finished for him.


“You thought I had seen you in porn and recognized you,”

“Yeah, I- I thought you’d been faking from the beginning and just wanted to-“ Derek trailed off, rubbing his palms on his jeans. “I felt like you had been using me.”

Stiles nodded, picking at a thread in his couch, “Well, I’m sorry you felt like that,” he said softly.

An uneasy silence fell over the room, and for the first time since they’d started dating, Derek felt worried and uncomfortable.

“Is that it?” Stiles asked.

“I- yes.”

Stiles nodded again, “I think you should go,”

Derek shook his head, dread settling in his stomach at the seriousness in Stiles words, “Stiles, I’m so, so sorry. I was stupid, but I’m going to make it up to you.”

“I accept your apology. But I still don’t think we should get back together.”

“Stiles, please. Look I know what I did was shitty-“

“No, you don’t know,” Stiles said softly, looking at Derek for the first time. “You don’t know what it’s like to be ignored and yelled at for something you never even did, for something you had no idea about! You don’t know because you didn’t ask! You just assumed I was like those people who used you and didn’t care even though I told you that I was in love with you. You didn’t believe me, you said you loved me but then you wouldn’t even listen,”

Derek felt the situation spiraling, feeling desperate, he got up to sit next to Stiles on the couch. Taking his hands, he rushed out, “I do love you, I love you so much, I just-“

“You didn’t trust me.” Stiles whispered, and Derek was horrified to see Stiles looking down, tears streaming down his cheeks. “You thought so little of me that I’d be so cruel, and then you didn’t trust me when I tried to talk to you. You wouldn't have believed me if I told you Erica always called you The King, or that I meant that being intimate with someone after so long was worth the wait.”

He looked up teary eyed at Derek, “That day, when you pushed me. You scared me Derek, I asked you to stop and you didn’t and all I could think about was Kevin,”

“Stiles, I’m not like him, I would never hit you-“

“Maybe not,” Stiles sniffled, taking one of his hands from Derek’s grip to wipe his eyes, “But I promised myself I would never let myself in a situation like that again, after him. I can’t,”

“Please, give me a chance, I know I was shitty but I love you Stiles, I love you!”

“Please don’t make this any harder than it already is,”

“You can’t ask me to stay away. Don’t ask me to do that.” Derek pleaded.

“I am,” Stiles sniffled, standing up and wrapping his hands around himself. “Just- go.”

Derek walked into his apartment numb.

He knew it wouldn’t take just an apology to earn Stiles back, but he still couldn’t help but feel discouraged by the entire ordeal. It was jarring to hear how Stiles felt, and hearing him cry; it made him want to die. He couldn't live with the fact that he'd made Stiles feel so insecure, so much like him. Fuck, he had scared Stiles.

He sat on his couch and grabbed a water bottle he’d left on the table. Taking a shaky gulp Derek wasn't surprised to feel tears dropping down his cheeks. Isaac said that Derek would have to woo Stiles and at first he thought he was right, but seeing what he’d done to Stiles, he knew he had to do more. Stiles wasn’t so shallow as to forgive him after a few chocolates and flowers-

Wait. Slamming down the water bottle and wiping his face quickly Derek opened his laptop. He had to do something for the man he loved. Derek grabbed his phone off the table, dialing a number after going on Google.

“Mimi’s flowershop?”

“Hello, I’d like to order a bouquet.”


“So you say he isn’t shallow enough to forgive you just because of some flowers and then you… get him flowers.”

“They’re not just flowers,” Derek snapped.

He was sitting besides Boyd, hidden behind newspapers again, the next day. On the bench across the street from the parlor, they had the perfect view of the inside.

“They’re his mothers favorite kind,” Derek admitted after a minute, “He told me he loved them cause they reminded him of her. A good memory.”

“And you think that will win him back?

“This isn’t about me winning him back, it’s about making the man I love smile and feel good. I haven’t been doing that for a while.”



“Nothing, I just never knew you were a sap.”

Derek ignored the comment, watching the shop closely. After ten minutes, the familiar van pulled onto the side of the road. He watched as the guys inside the shop looking out confused as a man emerged out of the side with a bouquet.

Too far to hear, Derek could only look on as Stiles met the man on the sidewalk and accepted the flowers with a stunned, pleased smile.

“That’s a good sign, he got your flowers and didn’t throw them in the gutter,” Boyd said mildly.

“I didn’t put my name on the card, he might of thought it was from his dad or something.”

“Wait,” Boyd turned to him incredulously, “Why didn’t you put your name on the card? He obviously loves the flowers.”

“He probably would have thrown them away if he saw they were from me,” he admitted, “And besides, I told you, this is about making him smile. Which he is.”

Boyd shook his head, mumbling, “Sap.”

Derek ignored him. He just continued staring at Stiles, closing his eyes and smelling the daffodils.


Derek was squinting at the latest layout for the months latest issue when Boyd walked in and cleared his throat.

“Um, Derek-“


Derek looked up at that voice. Scott stood in his doorway, eyebrows furrowed, looking angrier than Derek had ever seen him. Or as close to angry as Scott could look.

“Scott,” Derek greeted awkwardly, straightening up. “What-“

“You have to stop sending him those pictures.”

Derek deflated.

It had been two weeks since Derek started sending Stiles flowers daily. Erica told him it was incredibly cheesy, but he didn’t care. Stiles was happy because of them. However, just because he didn’t own up to sending his favorite flowers didn’t mean that he was doing nothing. In a desperate state one drunken night Derek decided to start sending Stiles every picture ever taken of the two of them. Boyd called him an idiot, but he was running out of ideas and hope.

Derek removed his glasses and sat down at the table. Scott walked in angrily, passing a bewildered Boyd who quickly left.


“No, Derek. They are making him fucking sad! What is wrong with you, why would you do that?”

“I’m trying to show him that I miss him, and that I will do whatever it takes to get him back.”

“Give it up Derek! These pictures only remind him of you and that night, it isn’t working. Just stop!”

Derek slammed his fist on the table, “I love him, I’m not going to let him get away!”

“You didn’t let him get away, you forced him away when you decided to accuse him of being a groupie!”

“I didn’t-“ Derek paused realizing that was what he actually did. “I overreacted. I fucked up, once. I love him, I don’t see why this has to be the end of us. I want him back.”

Scott regarded Derek for a moment, “You’re serious about him.”

It wasn’t a question. Derek shrugged helplessly. He heard more than saw Scott sigh and sit down next to him.

“Look, I know what you are trying to do.” Scott sighed, “Trust me, I tried the same thing when me and Allison were having problems in high school. But all it does is stir them up.”

“I just don’t know what to do, Scott.” Derek said softly. “I’ve called him every day for two weeks, I’ve sent him gifts, I’ve texted him, but he just ignores all of it. I know I fucked up, but I love him and I know he loves me. I just need to talk to him.”

“Then go to him,”

“I tried that Scott, and I ended up making him cry and kick me out.”

“Well, go again. He was upset then, but it’s obvious he still loves you. Just go and talk to him again. Who knows, you just might see your flowers all over the apartment.”

Derek looked up in surprise. Scott laughed quickly, “Yeah, you haven’t fooled anyone with that. Stiles might not say so, but he knows they’re from you.”

“You and Isaac are being a lot nicer than I deserve,”

“That’s true, and if you didn’t make Stiles so happy when you were together, we definitely wouldn’t be,” Scott rose from his seat. He pointed a finger at Derek, “Don’t fuck this up again.”

Derek was still sitting alone there when Boyd came back ten minutes later.

“What was that about?”

“I think I’ve got both Isaac and Scott’s blessing.”

Boyd smiled, “Good man. So what’s next, chocolates? Maybe send him a teddy bear?”

Ignoring Boyd Derek got up and went over to the magazines plans, “No. I’m going to talk to him.”

“Good choice.”

“But first-“ Derek flipped the middle of the issue, “I want to put in a story for a small business on the rise in Brooklyn.”

Boyd raised his eyebrow, “The Parlor?”

“I think it’s about time we sent a columnist out there, don’t you?”


Derek knocked reluctantly on Stiles’ door much later that night. He was nervous, but he’d spent all day at the office frantically organizing and bargaining for Stiles’ shop to be included in the next outgoing issue. The only thing that kept him going was thinking about the look on Stiles’ face when it was published.

Derek bounced on his feet until he heard the erratic stumbling footsteps to the door, signaling Stiles’ approach. When the door swung open, Derek swallowed his disappointment at Stiles’ look.

“Hi,” he waved awkwardly.

Stiles regarded him tiredly, “What do you want Derek?”

Derek winced. “Can I talk to you?”

“I don’t know if that’s-“

“I need to talk to you.”

Stiles reluctantly opened the door, and Derek walked in, the scene eerily similar to the last time he was there. He noted delighted though, the flowers he sent Stiles sitting in a vase on his living room table.

Derek turned to face Stiles who was standing by the door awkwardly. “I know it’s late, so I don’t plan on staying long.”

He shoved his hands in his pockets, “First, I want to apologize for sending you those pictures. It was insensitive of me, and I didn’t take your feelings into account. Seems like I’ve been doing that a lot lately.” He admitted. “I don’t mean to keep fucking with your feelings, but sometimes I freak out and don’t think and then I end up hurting the people I love. The best thing that had ever happened to me.”

Stiles bit his lip, staring at Derek.

“You are the best thing that ever happened to me Stiles, and I’m so sorry I made you doubt that, but now, now I just need you to know. You’re the only man I’ve ever met who is both an optimist and a pessimist, who is so fucking clumsy,” Derek laughed, meeting Stiles’ eyes, “Whose moles are like stars, and who makes my life perfect.”

“I came here thinking I would try to win you back, but-“ Derek took a deep breath, “I just need you to know that I love you, everything that you do and are, and even if you hate me forever, and never want to see me again, I want you to know how special you are. And- and if anyone treats you the way I did, that they don’t deserve you.”

Stiles looked shell shocked at his admission. “Derek- I love you too, of course I do. But-“ Derek’s heart sank, “I don’t know if I can be with-“

Derek held his hand up, not ready to hear the rest of that sentence. He already knew what was coming. “I know Stiles, you don’t need to explain. I just needed you to know that.”

Swallowing, Derek walked forward, stopping just beside Stiles. He leaned in and pecked him on the cheek quickly before leaving quietly.

On the ride home on the subway, Derek’s phone buzzed with a message from his buddy at work.

We can fit your find into the next edition. You owe me!!!

Despite his dejection, Derek smiled.


Derek stared the latest issue of The New Yorker in his hands. It was just released last week, nothing really special or different. Except very much so.

On page 34 was a full spread on The Parlor. A full critique by a columnist, pictures of the inside and out, a review on the “quirky, fun atmosphere”. All without Stiles and the guys' knowledge.

A month without seeing Stiles was harder than Derek had ever imagined. After a taste of Stiles in his life, leading one without him was empty. He didn’t even have the energy to yell at the guys who groped his cock on the bus the week before. But Stiles made it very clear he was done with Derek, and Derek was respecting that. No more calls, photos, surprise visits. Though, he did still send him flowers every now and again.

“You did good,” Derek looked up, seeing Boyd come into his living room with two beers.

“You think so?” he asked accepting the drink.

“You haven’t been by there recently have you?”

“No, not in weeks.”

“I drove by the other day man, it was packed.”

“Really?” Derek asked disbelievingly.

“Yeah man, what did you think would happen when you put a full page in The New Yorker about a ice cream place. People went there, and it seems like they love it. They had a line out the door, and I checked online, they have two hundred yelp reviews, all five stars!”

“Well, that wasn’t me. They ran a great place. I just helped get them the recognition they always deserved.”

“Fucking sap,” Boyd mumbled taking a sip from his beer.

When Boyd slipped on his jacket to go home nearly two hours later, Derek was stunned to see Stiles on the other side of the door, fist poised to knock.

“Um,” Stiles flushed as the two of them stared, “Hi.”

“Hi,” Derek breathed, staring. Stiles looked beautiful. His hair was longer than the last time he’d seen him, falling to the side artfully. His eyes shone bright amber, and his cheeks were rosy from the cold air outside.

Boyd looked between the two of them before moving to the door, “I’m going to head out. Good seeing you Stiles, it’s been a while.”

Stiles nodded, not taking his eyes off Derek.

“Do you want to come in?”

“Yeah,” Stiles stepped inside. He turned to Derek after he shut the door, and shockingly, he grinned. “Thank you.”


“The article!” Stiles laughed, and God did Derek miss that sound, “The one in your magazine! Did you really think any of us would think that we got all of these new customers because it was just luck? In the winter?”


“I asked someone, they’d said they read about it in The New Yorker. An edition you were the lead editor in! Thank you so much! Tons of people come in every day now and they love it! They're saying that they want to host birthday parties and place bulk orders! We are gonna keep the shop because of this Derek! Why didn’t you tell me?”

Derek shrugged, enjoying the excitement radiating off the younger man. “You deserved this. I didn’t want you to think that I was trying to pull something with you, I wanted you to get the validation you should have.”

Stiles softened, looking at Derek almost sadly. “That’s really sweet.”

Derek smiled at him embarrassed. Scratching the bad of his head awkwardly, he added, "Stiles- I want you to know how sorry I am."

Stiles watched his movements closely as he shrugged desperately.

"I was an asshole to you, I didn't trust you when I knew you could never do any of that nasty shit to me. And then when I- God Stiles, when I grabbed you. It was the biggest mistake of my life."

Stiles opened his mouth and Derek rushed to finish, "I would never hurt you Stiles. Never. I wanted to scare you out of my life so I used information you'd told me, your emotions, against you. It was shitty and disgusting, and you can never forgive me and I won't blame you, but please, please believe me when I promise you I am not your ex boyfriend. You could treat me like garbage for the rest of my life and I would never put my hands on you again. You ask me to stop and I will, swear to God."

After Derek's rushed confession, Stiles nodded, rubbing his hands over his arms awkwardly. "Never knew you were the type for speeches."

"I wasn't, guess you bring out the best in me," Derek said softly. Catching Stiles' eyes, he said, "Seriously Stiles. I fucked up and blew a fuse, but that will never happen again. I swear on my sisters' lives."

"That's a pretty deep claim," Stiles smiled small and hesitant at him, "Suppose I'll have to believe you. Plus, Boyd came to my house, said some things that help your case, I must say."

"What?" Derek asked, shocked.

"Yeah," Stiles confirmed, looking back at Derek. "He told me that you never felt worse about hurting me, but you tried to scare me worse than I scared you. His words." He added seeing Derek's confusion. "Told me you'd never physically wound me, that I didn't need to worry, could focus on being angry at you for being an asshole."

"Sounds like him," Derek smiled ruefully. "He was right though. I'm not Kevin, Stiles. I really just need you to know that."

Stiles was quiet for a moment before humming, "I know. Derek, it's no excuse for what you did but, I know. You aren't that guy, I know it was just a 'one-time-thing', I guess." He finished, using air quotes. "It didn't take me long after you left to figure that one out."

Derek nodded awkwardly, "I'm glad you did, though."

“You didn’t call,” Stiles said softly after a minute. “That day, after you came to my apartment. You never called me. Or visited again.”

“I thought I’d caused enough trouble.”

“I kept waiting for you to come see me again, for weeks.”

Derek furrowed his brows, “But- you said-“

“I was angry Derek! I didn’t want to see you at the time, but that didn’t-“ Stiles shuffled, fidgeting awkwardly. “That doesn’t mean I want you out of my life.”

Derek opened his mouth, feeling unsure. “So- You want to be friends?”

“No.” Stiles said firmly, “I could never just be friends with you Derek.” He stepped closer. “I miss you. I miss you so much, you- you’re all I think about. Yeah, I was hurt when all that stuff went down, it broke my fucking heart. But God Derek, I forgave you a long time ago. I love you. I never stopped.”

Derek stood, stunned, too afraid to let himself believe what was happening. Stiles wasn’t there. He wasn’t proclaiming his love. He wasn’t stepping closer and running his hands along Derek’s chest. He wasn’t leaning up to kiss him gently, experimentally.

Only he was.

Derek kissed his back desperately, with fervor. He didn’t want to let himself wake up. When they pulled apart Stiles was smiling up at him. “Those things you said at my house, they were the sweetest things anyone has ever said to me. Kinda cheesy, but I’ll give you a pass on that since it was your first romantic speech.”

Derek barked out a laugh, his chest close to bursting from happiness. He ignored the comment and grabbed Stiles by the face, licking into his mouth again.

Their kiss was wet, Derek’s tongue exploring Stiles’ mouth, making up for lost time. He stroked his soft cheeks and moved them down to rest on Stiles’ sharp hip bones. Stiles moaned as Derek walked them back to his counter, boxing him in.

Making up for lost time, Derek thought as they frantically clawed at each other, pushing jackets off each other and shoving icy hands under shirts.

Derek groaned headily as Stiles broke off, kissing down Derek’s jaw to the juncture between shoulder and neck. He nipped and bit the skin there before sucking lightly, his grip tight in Derek’s shirt. After a few heated moments he pulled back.

“Does it make me easy if I want to have sex right after we reconcile?” Stiles whined into Derek’s neck.


Stiles mock gasped, smacking Derek’s arm. “Hey!”

“Kidding, kidding,” Derek laughed; he lowered his hand to palm at Stiles’ ass. “I’ve been thinking about this since the moment I saw you,”

“You romantic you.” Stiles murmured, nuzzling Derek’s neck.

Derek pulled back, ducking quickly to scoop Stiles up bridal style, and carry him giggling to his bedroom.

Dropping him on to the bed, Derek crawled over Stiles, leaning down to kiss Stiles hard on the mouth. Stiles squirmed under him, pushing Derek back to remove his shirt. Derek looked down at Stiles, flushed faced and genuinely happy. He wanted to count the moles on his cheeks forever.

“I love you.”

Stiles smiled up at Derek, “I love you too,” he said softly.

They removed the rest of their clothes quickly, kisses heated and passionate. It felt so light and dream-like to Derek, kissing Stiles, hearing him moan when he stroked his cock, feeling his long fingers grab at his fat dick.

“I want to eat you out,” Derek whispered into Stiles’ ear.

“I- yeah. Yes. I agree with this plan.”

Derek flipped Stiles over, shoving his face into the bed and grabbing at the globes of his ass. “I can’t wait to be inside you,” he growled, licking a long strip up from Stiles’ balls to his hole, eliciting a moan from the younger man. Spreading his cheeks he blew on the hole, watching it clench and unclench desperately. “You shaved.” He commented mildly, noting his clean hole. He blew another breath before pushing the tip of his tongue into Stiles’ tiny hole.

Stiles jumped, moaning low, “Y-yeah, I kind of hoped that something like this would happen.”

Derek hummed, shoving his tongue deeper inside and sweeping side to side. He pulled back and licked his wrinkled rim, sloppily licking in and out. He hooked his thumbs in Stiles’ hole and stretched him further, getting Stiles’ hole wet with his quick pokes inside.

“Derek,” Stiles breathed. “Please fuck me, I can’t take it.”

Derek didn’t need to argue. He pressed a chaste kiss to Stiles’ rim and leaned back to fumble through his bedside drawer. Grabbing up a small tube of lube and one condom, he set the condom aside to spread some lube onto his finger.

“Oh God, oh God,” Stiles squirmed as Derek’s first finger pushed into him steadily.

“I prefer Derek,” he smirked, curling his finger slightly.

“You did not just make that terrible joke,” Stiles choked out a manic laugh, dissolving into whines when Derek added another finger and started scissoring him open.

By the fourth finger, Stiles was wild. “Derek, please,”

“I have to prep you good Stiles, I don’t want to hurt you,”

“Yeah, yeah you have a monster cock, I get it,” Stiles groaned, wiggling his ass around Derek’s still sheathed fingers, “I want you to fuck me.”

Derek nodded to himself grabbing Stiles’ waist and flipping him on to his back. He kissed him one last time before leaning back. Stiles grabbed the condom and looked at it for a second before handing it to Derek. “Oh my God you use extra large condoms. That’s- holy shit. Derek your dick is huge, I already knew that, but seeing this, oh God.”

Derek smiled at Stiles’ rambling, rolling on the condom and coating his dick with lube. He hooked his hands under Stiles’ knees and pulled them up to expose his winking hole. Grabbing his cock, he stroked it one last time before putting the head against Stiles’ ass. Slowly, he began to push.

It was difficult. Stiles’ ass was little, and Derek needless to say, had a lot to work with.

“Derek, it isn’t going to fit,” Stiles blurted. He flushed immediately, and Derek leaned down to kiss Stiles.

“I’m not going to hurt you,” he murmured.

He kept pushed, popping in his flared head to easily slide the shaft of his penis inside Stiles. Stiles was hot and tight, impossibly so, gripping his penis in a way that was almost painful, but so, so good. His sensitive dick twitched inside Stiles. He paused when he was fully inside, watching Stiles’ twisted face. After heated moments, Stiles blew out a breath and nodded.

“I’m ready, you can move,” he wrapped his legs tighter around Derek’s waist and stroked the back of his neck. “Make love to me.”

Derek smiled down and pulled out carefully. When only the thick head of his dick was left inside, he moved his hips in small circles, tracing the inner rim with his tip before sliding back in completely. Stiles heat was almost unbearable, he felt like he was pushing into a furnace.

Stiles’ chest was as flushed as his face, and his mouth seemed redder than usual, open in a moan. His dick was straight against his stomach, bobbing with the force of Derek’s soft thrusts. Taking pity on his desperate, wiggling boyfriend, Derek wrapped a fist around Stiles’ cock.

Stiles moaned loud, twitching at the feeling of Derek stroking him. Derek’s speed picked up, his hips snapping to make his ass jiggle every time hip met cheek. Derek moved his hand up to run his thumb across Stiles’ slit.

Stiles eyes snapped open, “No- D-Derek, don’t-“ he cut off, biting his lower lip hard enough to draw blood. Derek was about to ask when Stiles dick twitched violently before cum shot out towards Derek’s stomach, coating his hand.

Derek paused in his thrusting to watch in awe at Stiles’ softening cock. Stiles groaned, embarrassed, “Oh my God, I didn’t mean to come so fast, you were just so hot and-“

Derek stopped Stiles with a bruising kiss, licking filthily into his mouth. “You’re so amazing,” he breathed, pulling back to haul Stiles even closer and snap his hips.

“Ah!” Stiles cried, his oversensitive body limp, unable to do anything but grip Derek’s sliding dick.

Not long after, Derek shuddered, feeling pooling heat in his stomach before he came into the condom. He held himself above Stiles, both of them breathing heavy as Derek’s cock shrank inside of Stiles.

He pulled out slowly before collapsing next to Stiles, reaching out to kiss him again.

“I love you,”

Stiles grinned tiredly. “Right back atcha,”


“So that’s the illustrious dick you were so worried about,” Stiles mused some time into their afterglow. He turned on his side and looked at Derek through his lashes, “I gotta say, I don’t know if it lived up to the hype,”

“Really?” Derek dead-panned giving Stiles a look. He rested his hand against Stiles waist, rubbing his thumb over the skin then.

Stiles smiled mischievously, “Yeah, I mean, what’s the point of a big dick if you don’t know how to use it?”

“Oh, you are so getting it now,” Derek growled, flipping Stiles over playfully and swatting his bare ass.

Stiles laughed happily, wiggling his butt back at Derek, “Bring it on!”


Derek walked into his apartment stiffly, groaning in pleasure as he eased his bag off his shoulder. It had been a long day at the office, and the closer it got to deadlines, the longer he worked.

“Stiles?” he called for his boyfriend, massaging his temples. With both of their schedules busier than ever, because of Derek’s recent promotion and the staggering popularity of Stiles business demanded more and more of his time, he cherished their time doing nothing together. After only three months of being back together, they’d moved in together. A shock to basically everyone, Isaac especially. Scary as it seemed at first, it was the best thing Derek had ever done.

Stiles recently, had made enough money and regulars to hire two more employees, part time and low pay. It had been his day off, and usually Derek came home to him cooking, or watching television on the couch. Derek supposed today was unusual.

He moved further in the apartment, grabbing the mail off the counter. He walked to their bedroom without looking, sifting through mail. He paused at the entrance to their room. Noises were coming from inside, weird noises, noises like-

“Oh-Oh Derek, fuck me with your big cock, I want you to come in my pussy, c’mon-“

Derek wrenched open the door. Stiles sat in the center of their bed, legs crossed, watching the television and eating microwave popcorn. But it was what was on the TV that got Derek.

“Yeah baby, you like my fat dick inside you?”

“Hey baby,” Stiles greeted happily, still watching the Derek on screen fuck Alexis Texas, oblivious to Derek’s horror. “How come you don’t call me "daddy’s little whore" when we have sex?”

“What-“ Derek looked at him unbelievingly. “Are you watching my porn?!”

“Yep!” Stiles nodded, grabbing the remote to pause the scene. “I was thinking the other day. I was busy pleasuring myself reading about Captain Phillip and his captured cabin boy when I realized, I've never actually seen Derek in action. Now, I know, normally I despise porn, because of it’s lack of passion and sincerity, but I figured seeing my hot boyfriend might be worth renting a few discs from the X-rated video place.”

Derek groaned, rubbing his eyes again. “Why, why do you do weird shit?”

“Hey, this is on you, you knew what you were getting into!”

Derek huffed out a laugh, crawling onto the bed until he sat behind Stiles, hands around his waist. He pecked his cheek, “So, besides- this- what did you do on your day off?”

Stiles hummed, leaning back into Derek, “I went out with Scott and Alli today, we got lunch,”

“Oh yeah, how are they doing?”

“Good, and for once they’re taking it slow. I’m happy for them though, I think working it out was the best thing either of them ever did.”

“Yeah, it’s good they gave it another go.”

“Then,” Stiles continued, “I went to check on Isaac at the shop, and you’ll never believe, he was actually wearing the uniform!”

“The paper hat?”

“The uniform Derek, he was wearing it! Enough people complained that me and the newbies were the only ones honoring the retro theme he finally relented.”

“I bet he was happy about that,”

“He said he was going to kill me, but I think he’ll come around.”

Derek rolled his eyes, laughing at his boyfriend. He was about to speak when Stiles turned to him suddenly.

“Oh! By the way, you weren’t picking up your phone before, so I kinda told Laura that we would have dinner with them this weekend.”

“Oh God,” Derek groaned.

“What! I love your sisters, the last time we went out was so fun!”

“That’s because you guys just traded embarrassing stories and I picked up the check.”

“Stop being so grumpy,” Stiles waved his hand at Derek, turning back to the TV. “Now, shush. I’m waiting in fitful suspense to see if you actually do make Alexis squirt like you promised her.”

Pressing play, Stiles shoved more popcorn in his mouth. Derek shook his head at the man he loved, resting his chin on Stiles’ shoulder.

Sitting there, hugging his boyfriend, while watching himself fuck some woman onscreen, Derek decided he’d never been happier. Something he thought he could never have because of his dick. Now, he supposed he liked his life, and his dick, just fine.