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Drink, Drugs and Dancing

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Ava was lying out on her bed, music blasting, it was late, but Deborah was out, and she was in her own room, so it should not be disturbing for Marcus who was still locked in his office downstairs working. She sighed. Her playlist was the most angsty girls like girls playlist she could put together on Spotify. She needed to get this feeling out somehow, she needed to wallow in some self-pity for a bit. Sad frustrated and annoyed that Deborah was out on a date with Marty. What did she see in that dude, she could do so much better, he treats her like shit? Ava thought to herself, and she turned over, allowing herself to cry and sing along to the songs. It was a pitiful site she knew that. Curled up on her bed, sobbing over a woman who would never look at her like that. The next song started to play, and she couldn’t help but mutter along with the song, as she cried.

I grew pretty attached to you

Like a dog on a lead

Thought you were everything I could ever have dreamed of

And more than I could ever need

But you like boys, boys, boys

But you like boys, boys, boys

And you don't like me…

She laughed and swallowed again. ‘Men! She likes men, not boys at least…old men.’ Ava laughed in disgust. ‘Old men who treat her like shit.’

Lost in her own wallowing and grief over the fact she liked someone who would never like her back. She hadn’t noticed that it had gotten quite late and there was a shadow of a person standing near her half open bedroom door, watching over her and listening to her singing along to the angsty songs.

The music had been loud and the person in question had removed her heels when she had entered the mansion and had creeped along the corridor curious to what Ava was listening to, when she heard Ava sob and cry again, she knew she needed to say something. She couldn’t leave the young women alone in her pain, also she didn’t like how loudly she was playing the music and it was unfair on other people in the mansion at this late hour. She cleared her throat, but it wasn’t enough to alert Ava to her presence.

‘Ava?’ she spoke firmly.

Ava jumped at hearing Deborah’s voice. ‘Shit!’ she snapped. She sprung from the bed and turned to face Deborah, who was in the black dress she had worn for DJs birthday months ago. Her hair up and her heels in her hands. Ava looked mortified at being caught in her despair.

‘Ava?’ Deborah went to step inside Ava’s room and pushed the door open fully. Ava didn’t give her a chance to say anything else. She looked her up and down and before Deborah could even breath, Ava bolted out the door. She pushed past the other women and didn’t stop. She didn’t even turn the music off. Deborah froze and stood bewildered as she watched Ava run from her room.

A moment of two passed and Deborah grabbed her ipad, that was playing the music and rushed after her, she dropped her heels in the process of going after her. Ava of course, was quicker, but Deborah wanted to stop her from leaving.

Rushing down the staircase. She had been met by the confused faces of Josefina and Marcus.

‘Deb?’ Did Ava just run out the front door and leave it open?’ they all turned to look at the door flapping back and forth on the hinges. Marcus had left his office at the sound of Ava running down the stairs, clearly crying.

‘Looks like it…’

‘What happened?’ Josefina asked concerned. ‘Should we go after her?’ she looked at Deborah confused and was talking loudly, to be heard over the music coming from the item she was holding.

‘I don’t know…she was playing music, she looked upset, I only went to check on her.’ Deborah turned to Marcus. ‘Can you turn it off? It’s rather loud?’

‘Yeah, fine Deb.’

She handed him the ipad and he looked down at the list of songs as he switched it off. ‘God they’re all lesbian angst songs and the playlist…well…. she named it Deborah.’ He passed the ipad back to her for her to read it for herself.

‘She looked horrified to see me standing in her doorway, she has never looked at me like that before…’ her voice sounded strangled, her eyes glancing down at the list of songs before she looked away unable to read them in that moment.

‘Because she was crying over you Deb?’ Marcus offered helpfully, as he pointed a finger down at the ipad in her hand and pointed to the list of songs again.

‘Poor kid.’ Josefina added. ‘She thinks she is alone in this.’ She turned to look at Deborah. The three of them were in the corridor still looking at the open front door.

‘Alone in what?’ Deborah sounded desperate and confused.

‘She has feelings for you Deb, you must have noticed?’ Marcus said plainly. ‘Your gaydar isn’t that bad Deb, you must have seen her mooning over you?’

Deborah forcefully shoved the ipad back at him, slapping it to his chest, ‘Just because she is a bisexual, that doesn’t mean she likes me like that!’ she snapped angrily. ‘So don’t mock me, ok! Don’t make me out to be some old fool.’

‘You have been fucking blind Deb!’ He spat back annoyed at her.

Josefina intervened. ‘Stop! What do we do about Ava? She has just run out of the house, it’s late. Do we even know if she has her phone or money or anything?’

‘For Pete’s sake, she is going to be death of me! She is a grown woman, let her go.’ Deborah scoffed. She walked over to the door and slammed it shut.

‘Deb?’ Marcus turned to her.

‘Give me that!’ Deborah yanked the ipad out of his hands and stalked back upstairs.

‘What do we do?’ Marcus asked Josefina.

‘We call Kiki… come on, let’s sort this mess.’ She walked him back to his office.

Meanwhile Deborah was pacing her bedroom. Angry and embarrassed about what Marcus had said. Deborah looked down at the ipad in her hands, turned down the volume and pressed play. She chucked it on the bed and let the songs play. She listened as she walked around her room. She let her hand run along the back of the couch. The couch just earlier she had been sat on with Ava working. 5 or 6 songs in she noticed a theme to all of them, they where all songs about pining over the perfect woman who wouldn’t want you back.

What had Josefina meant by, she thinks she is alone in this, she is alone isn’t she? Ava has feelings, I don’t. Deborah was reasoning with herself. I was just on a date with Marty. A date which I cut short and came home to Ava. She was running her hand through her hair nervously.

‘Fuck!’ she slapped her forehead and scrunched her eyes shut. Without missing a beat, she hurried out her bedroom and went back down to Marcus’ office.

‘Sorry.’ She said sheepishly. ‘Do you know where she might go?’ Marcus looked at her confused, Josefina was still in the office, they had been chatting about what had happened.

‘How the bloody hell would I know? Lucky for you, we rang Kiki. She picked her up, they have gone to a bar.’

‘Which one!?’ Deborah sounded panicky and harsh.

‘I’ll text Kiki and find out?’ Marcus already had his phone in his hand and was sending the message.

‘Ok fine, I’m grabbing my keys and I will go and find her.’ Deborah huffed and she swung around and marched back out of Marcus’ office swiftly.

He called out, ‘I have forwarded you the address Deb!’ his head was poked out the office door. Deborah was stood by the front entrance, waiting for his update.
‘Thanks, don’t wait up guys, do go to bed or go home…or whatever it is you do when you are off the clock. See you tomorrow.’ Deborah rushed out the front door and slammed it shut as she hurried to her car.

‘Do you think she might have realised something by any chance?’ Josefina laughed as she turned to Marcus.

He rolled his eyes annoyed. ‘Perhaps, but either way, it’s messy. Anyway, she’s right, I am heading home. Night.’


20 or maybe 25 minutes past and Deborah was parked up in a place near to the bar Kiki and Ava were meant to be at. She had already jumped out and was walking towards the doors when the doorman looked at her oddly.

‘Wow, lady, you are bit dressed up for this place?’ He looked her up and down.

Oh shit, she was still in her outfit from her date with Marty, it was way over the top.

‘Well, I am meeting someone…going to let me in or what?’ she spat.

‘Sure, sorry. Looking good though!’ He stepped out of the way and let her into the bar. She had quickly scanned the room, and spotted Kiki sat alone at the bar. She had been playing with her cocktail glass.

‘Kiki?’ Deborah approached. ‘Where is she?’

‘Girl.’ Kiki hugged Deborah and looked over her shoulder in the direction of the dance floor. ‘Our pancake is over there. But wow! Look at you. You look hot! Is this for our girl?’ she looked at her confused.

‘No, I was on a date, before this debacle happened. She looks…drunk’ she was stared at Ava who was flinging her body around the dance floor manically. ‘Unless that how she normally dances?’ Deborah folded her arms, unimpressed.

‘Oh, she is…she did God knows how many shots when we got in…’ Kiki shrugged.

‘You couldn’t have been here long Keeks?’ Deborah had shaken her head in dismay.

‘I know…maybe 8 or 9, she lined them up.’

‘For fuck’s sake! That isn’t the answer…I’m going to get her and take her home.’ She angrily exclaimed, rubbing the bridge of her nose with her hand, trying to sooth herself before facing Ava.

‘Sorry, she didn’t want to talk…and I didn’t want to leave her on her own, but I need to get back. A neighbour is looking after Luna…are you going to be ok to get her home or do you need a hand?’ Kiki sounded concerned.

‘I’ll do it…if you need to go, it’s ok.’

‘I’ll wait a minute and see how she reacts to seeing you.’ Kiki smiled.

Deborah nodded and pushed her way onto the dance floor. She was sure she heard some girl gasp and ask if it was Deborah Vance in the bar. She ducked her head and made a bee line for Ava.

‘Ava! We are going!’

Ava spun around startled to see her there. She stopped dead, her arms stopped flailing and she ‘How much did I drink!?’ she looked horrified to see her there. ‘I’m having a nightmare, right?’

‘Charming.’ Deborah reached out and grabbed her by the elbow. Some young girl who was dancing nearby and who had taken a shine to Ava, spoke suddenly.

‘You are not leaving yet, are you? Night was just getting good.’ She was leaning into Deborah’s and Ava’s space to be heard over the music.

‘Sorry love, she’s mine.’ Deborah smiled bitterly. ‘Ava, honey, we are bloody leaving.’

Kiki had already vanished from the bar when Deborah looked up. Great, she really would need to drag her out on her own.

‘Okay, okay Lady. Stop pulling me…’ Ava yanked her arm away, but stumbled, forcing Deborah to grab her by the waist to steady her.

‘Alright, I might need a hand to get me to the car.’ Ava sounded defeated.

Deborah guided her out by her waist, and over to the car. She lowered her head with her hand, so Ava wouldn’t hit it as she got in, making sure the girl was fastened in, she got in the driver’s side.

‘Did you not drink with Marrrty?’ Ava looked at her worried, as she realised it was Deborah behind the wheel.

‘Two small glasses and that was a while ago, and I have eaten. To be honest all this has completely sobered me up. I’m fine to drive, I got here ok, didn’t I?’ she raised her brow at her.

‘Let’s go then.’ Ava smiled. Deborah turned away. She had not wanted to look at her in that moment, she was so pissed off with her.

They finally arrived at the mansion, Ava tried to talk in the car, but Deborah had told her to shut up, she needed to concentrate on the road. Deborah reluctantly helped Ava out the car and in through the front door.

‘Oh, no…’ Ava pulled away, her body was making some weird movements.

‘WHAT?!’ Deborah looked at Ava worried. What the hell was she doing? Deborah thought to herself.

‘I took something, like just before you dragged me out…oh, no…Deb…D…I need to…I need to…’

‘Oh, not again. I can’t watch you fucking dance again.’ her eyes went wide, she grabbed her by her hand and pulled her up the staircase. Ava tripped and fell all over the place, but Deborah kept her up right, well kind of. She got her to Ava’s room.

‘I can’t sleep like this…’ Ava looked down at her bed and swayed.

‘That girl? At the bar…that’s why she didn’t want you to leave…why she said the night was just getting good.’

‘Um uh… that girl…um, yeah. Uh.’ Ava could no longer string a sentence together. ‘D, don’t leave me…’ Ava was moving to no music and she looked ridiculous.

‘I can’t watch this…’ she went to leave the room, but she heard Ava whimper. ‘Damnit ok, give me two minutes…’

Deborah stepped outside the bedroom, she had two choices leave the girl alone to make a fool of herself or make a fool of herself as well. She was rubbing her temples with her fingers, stressed, then she had hurried to her own room. She grabbed Ava’s ipad off her bed, where it lay from earlier, a bottle of whiskey and slipped her heels back off that she had to put back on earlier, when she rushed out to the bar to collect Ava.

‘AVA!’ Deborah snapped as she saw her dancing around her room.

‘Uh…um.’ Ava looked at her confused, her arms swaying around still.

‘There isn’t even any music.’ Deborah shook her head, exasperated. ‘Turn this infernal thing on.’ She shoved the ipad at Ava and Ava just about managed to press the few buttons to make it work. Some dance music blared out of the speakers it was now synced with. Deborah winced but didn’t argue. Ava flopped on the end of the bed and lay back. Her legs over the side, and her feet still on the floor.

‘Uugh.’ She sat back up quickly. ‘I can’t. I need to…move…’ Ava stood up again and started jumping around.

Deborah watched for a moment and opened the bottle of whisky.

‘I can’t drink that…’ Ava pointed at the bottle.

‘I’m not an idiot, it’s not for you.’ Deborah brought the bottle of amber liquid to her lips and downed quite a lot of the bottle in one or two gulps.

‘Fuck Deb. That was hot and weird…. what…um…uh.’ Ava was stumbled over her words. Confused, high and perhaps a bit turned on.

‘Shut up.’ Deborah snapped. Her eyes narrowed, she took another big gulp and put the lid back on. Finding herself suddenly very drunk. She plonked the bottle down on the dresser in the room. She leant on the chair for a second, that was in front of the dresser. Steading her feet.

‘Deb?’ Ava was looking at her, worried. She had stopped moving.

‘Dance then!’ Deborah demanded and Ava started dancing again. Deborah reached out and Ava took her hand. Deborah started to move with the music. Ava’s eyes wondered up and down her body, the black dress still clung to her beautifully.

When a faster song came on. Ava expected Deborah to stop, but instead she let Ava go and started to dance around the room quickly by herself. Ava followed. Their arms and legs flailing around, no care in the world.

‘You dance better than Ellen!’ Ava smiled.

‘Um…what?’ Deborah was still moving. ‘What are blabbering on about?’

‘Nothing. Forgot.’ Ava spoke quietly. She giggled and turned, laughing harder, she swung her arms around more vigorously.

‘Are you working it out your system yet?’ Deborah asked curiously. Her own slurred speech giving away how drunk she was.

‘Maybe…thanks for dancing with me.’ Ava grinned.

Deborah rolled her eyes; she went over to the dresser and grabbed the bottle. She took another big gulp. ‘You are infuriating.’

She turned back to Ava and danced with her, their bodies more in sync than either of them would have expected. Ava felt their heat between them. She watched as Deborah swayed her hips and moved her arms and legs seductively. She looked free. Ava thought it was the sexiest thing in the world. They danced liked that for a long time. Neither of them wanting to pull away. They allowed themselves to dance quickly when a faster song came on. They both laughed and giggled at how silly they both looked.

Finally, after a few more songs, Ava slowed down, she could see Deborah was flagging, but she too was ridiculously thirsty. ‘Water?’

‘I’ll get it honey.’ Deborah staggered to the ensuite. She took the opportunity to use the toilet and grab two tumblers from the cabinet and pour two glasses of water. Looking in the mirror, she leant on the sink. Her mascara had run a bit and her hair no longer looked perfect, she was drunk, tired and unsure what this was. The morning was going to be painful. She sighed, thinking about the headache she was going to have. She downed the water and poured another one to replace it. She stepped out the bathroom and held out a tumbler for Ava to drink.

‘Thanks D.’ Ava took the cup, her hand brushing against Deborah’s fingers. She shyly looked at her. ‘I could try and sleep…it’s late…’

‘Do, what you need to do…I think we have been dancing for hours?’ she looked at her shocked at the realisation. Ava turned the music off, so they could talk or decide what to do next.

‘Yeah…I think we have…’ Ava laughed. ‘You looked amazing.’

‘You are high as fuck…anyone would look amazing the state you are in…I’m drunk.’ Deborah spoke dryly and honestly.

‘Don’t care! You were great.’ Ava stepped closer, but Deborah looked away. Unwilling to do anything in the state they were both in.

‘Will you stay here, whilst I get ready to sleep…’ Ava was drinking the water.

‘I suppose’ Deborah shrugged. She walked over to the bed and sat down. ‘Hurry. I need my bed too.’

Ava ran into the ensuite to get ready for bed, she brushed her teeth, drank more water and used the toilet. She looked hot and sweaty, but she didn’t care, because Deborah looked the same. There was something amazing she thought, about how free and undone she had looked. Ava pushed her hair back off her face, she couldn’t believe she had just watched Deborah Vance drunkenly dance around her room, completely lost to the music and not worrying about what Ava thought of her. She felt lucky, privileged for such a moment. She washed her face with some water. Wiped it with the towel, she wiped the last of the water off, she stared back at her reflection in the mirror. She took a few breaths and chucked the towel down on the side. Ava stepped out the room, about to speak she stopped. Deborah was lying on her bed. Her head against the pillow opposite to Ava’s usual side of the bed. Her arms were splayed out, her head turned to one side, her eyes were closed. Ava panicked, she didn’t know if she should wake her or leave her there to slumber, but when she heard Deborah gently sign in her sleep. She knew she couldn’t wake her. She looked happy. She had a smile on her face. Ava tiptoed around to her side of the bed. She pulled off her clothes, found a clean t-shirt she tugged it on. She slipped into the bed, carefully pulling the blanket over herself. She grabbed the remote that controlled the lights and turned them all off. She lay down. Her eyes wide. She could feel the weight of Deborah next to her. She felt Deborah’s hand move, a twitch, then it slowly was feeling around the bed, Ava looked down and, in the dark, could feel the movement. Deborah reached out; she took Ava’s hand into hers. Their fingers curled around each other’s. Ava let out a quiet gasp, feeling the warmth in her hand. For now, it was enough, her eyes started to droop, and the next thing Ava had drifted off to sleep. Peaceful and calm. They were together.