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Tell Me Not, Sweet, I Am Unkind

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“Let’s stay a few days.”

“Excuse me?” Dean and Jo both looked at Sam as though he’d sprouted a second head.

“What? I mean, come on Dean. You said it yourself, we don’t know where Lilith is, we don’t know the next seal she’s going after, and you refuse to talk to Ruby. We have nothing. The ghost we came for is gone and we don’t already have another hunt lined up. Look, all I’m saying is we should take a few days. Just three or four. And we should reassess where we are and what to do next. No one knows where we are, the house is decent enough and it’s free.”

The meager hours of sleep Jo managed had been enough to rebuild her denial. She had been able to face the brothers this morning without blushing or stammering and she’d built up a pretty firm wall of disbelief around those thoughts she’d fought with the night before. Something about this, though, was striking a chord with her. She was having a hard time believing that Sam, who always wanted to rush in and go straight for the end goal, would be pushing for temperance. Dean was saying something to that effect even as she thought it. Of course. His brother would know him well to. Hm. Brother…. Even with her walls, that was a word she was stumbling over this morning. She forced her mind away from that and back to Sam. Frustration was coming off him in waves, “I’m tired Dean. All we ever do is run and work. You don’t let us stop. I’m tired and I need a break. The last time we stopped, even for a couple days, was over a year ago. You wanted a break before you went to Hell. Well, I do too.” The silence that hit was thick enough to drive a truck over.

“We’re going to win. We’re going to stop it.” Dean was firm, as if he believed his will alone could make it true.

Sam sighed, heavy and deep. “I’m sure we will. But Dean…please?”

Jo’s wide eyes flicked from one to the other. Dean’s shoulders were drooped, his head was hung. She could feel his defeat. “Ok. Sure thing, Sammy.” His voice was low and rough.

Even though her heart ached for them, Jo couldn’t stop her mind echoing Dean’s voice, “Sure thing, Sammy…. Jesus, Sammy, yes!”

“…stay too, Jo.”

Her attention snapped back to Sam. “What?”

“I want you to stay too. Stay here with us for a couple days. You need to recoup too. Besides,” he smiled as he stepped forward and gently rubbed his thumb across her still sore lip, “we need you to keep us on our best behavior. Who knows what we might do if you’re not here.” Jo’s heart stopped. God, don’t let me be blushing. She didn’t know how to back out gracefully without implicating herself.

“Yeah, alright. We’ll have to go into town and get some supplies. I am not sleeping on that couch again; in fact, I may salt and burn it. I’ll by an air mattress or something.” She really hoped her voice sounded normal, though angry would be better. The boys both laughed at her. Dean walked up behind her, putting his hands on her shoulder and leaned in like he was getting ready to whisper a secret, “You’re a pussy, Jo.” He chuckled at her. Her retort of 'being pissy, not a pussy' didn’t make it out because she only just heard Sam. “She certainly is.” Something about the way he whispered it made her suddenly aware that Sam was still in front of her, only a couple inches away, and Dean was still directly behind her, his hands on her shoulders. She was trapped neatly between them. She was also suddenly aware that her body wasn’t entirely unhappy about that. Another brick fell out of her wall. Damn.

 

The first stop they made was a campground just outside of town that had showers. The heat relaxed the soreness in Jo’s shoulder. The bruise seemed content to be under the skin and she was just happy not to have broken it. Half an hour later, they were clean of body if not spirit and continued into town. The ride was quiet. She couldn’t bring herself to make conversation, because she just didn’t know what to say. “So, you two been fucking long?” it just didn’t seem like that had the potential to be a friendly conversation. Besides, it wasn’t really any business of hers anyway. She did manage to participate enough to suggest McDonald’s instead of waiting for brunch at the diner. Dinner could come from the diner. “It’s a change. It’s cheaper.” The truth was she didn’t want to have awkward conversation while they waited for their food. This is stupid. They’ll notice more wrong from you avoiding things than you not talking. Besides, it was just a fight, remember? She was having a hard time convincing herself again. She forced herself to be normal as they piled back into the car to shop, which went much easier. She was able to forget all the weirdness watching them butt heads. Sam was getting canned goods, rock salt, bottled water, duct tape, gauze, thread, and all the necessities. Dean walked up with a large bag of M&Ms, two bottles of Jack and the latest issue of Busty Asian Beauties. “I’m done.”

Jo busted out laughing. “Nice, Dean, real nice.”

“Hey, only the necessities of life. Didn’t you ever listen to that singing bear?”

“First of all, that was the bear necessities; second of all, I doubt he was talking about liquor and porn.”

“Of course he was. He’s a bear.”

And that was the kind of logic that she didn’t even want to try and follow. The only odd moment came when she was getting her air mattress. Dean had wandered off, under orders from Sam to put. The porn. Back. When she and Sam walked into the sporting goods section, she grabbed the first twin size she saw and dumped it into the cart. “Done. What’s next on the list?” Before she could walk away, Sam took the mattress out of the cart and handed it back to her. “What?”

“No, you’ll need to get a queen or possibly a king, but at least a queen.” She arched an eyebrow at him. “I may not always have room to set up a queen. I’ll pretty much always have room for a twin.”

Sam scoffed, “If you don’t have room for a queen size mattress, then there isn’t enough room for you anyway. Specially with as much as you like to move around at night.” Sam’s eyes met hers. Fuck! Without saying anything, she put the twin back and grabbed a queen. Sam didn’t say anything else, but his smirk made her heart race. After three more aisles of silence, Jo took her mattress to the front and paid, leaving Sam and Dean to finish shopping on their own. By the time they came out to the Impala, she had convinced herself it was an innocent remark. She even took Dean’s teasing about being a terrible girl for not liking to shop. They picked up their order from the diner and headed out of town. They returned to the house just as the sun was beginning to sink below the horizon. Dean built up the fire and lit the kerosene lamps as Jo set up her new bed in front of the hated couch. When it was fully inflated, a plastic bag dropped down in the middle of it. “What’s this?” Jo pulled the bag to her.
“An Un-Birthday present.” Sam smiled down at her, “You forgot to get sheets.”

It was a set of simple, white sheets and a matching pillow case. “Thank you Sam, I totally spaced on that.”

“Figured you had. Enjoy.” Sam flashed her a smile, all dimples and white teeth.

Conversation was easy and relaxed after that. They talked as they ate the greasy food, and kept talking when they moved on to Dean’s Jack. They were all relaxed by the time the bottle made its fifth or sixth round. Being half their size, Jo ended up drunk much sooner than the boys, even if she did last almost through the bottle.

She didn’t remember lying down or passing out. Her limbs were heavy and lethargic, but her mind had already begun to reach consciousness. She was at the blissful place where she was awake enough to know it, but not awake enough to care. She was barely aware of a rustling sound in front of her and an occasional sigh, but she was more concerned with all the alcohol she’d drank. How bad was tomorrow going to be? How close to empty had that bottle been the last time it had passed her?

“Dude?! What are you doing? What if we wake Joanna?” Dean’s shocked whisper suddenly had her caring about the here and now. She kept her eyes closed and focused all her attention to the boys.

“She’s not going to wake up unless you wake her up. Do you want to wake her up?” There was more rustling followed by the sound of a zipper slowly, teasingly being pulled. Sam’s voice was lower than normal. Huskier and more sure of himself. Just barely opening her eyes, she gazed at the boys through her lashes. Things low in her body tightened and her heart hammered against her chest. They both had their backs to her and Sam was spooning Dean in what was definitely un-brotherly ways. He was propped up on one arm, nibbling at Dean’s neck, his other arm reaching over Dean’s waist and disappearing into obviously open jeans. Almost casually, he rocked against Dean in time with the movement of his hand. “You want to wake her up, don’t you? You’ve thought about it. Her waking up, maybe coming over here and joining us?” Dean arched his back, pushing against Sam. His breath exploded into ragged pants, covering the gasp that Jo couldn’t quite stop. With a dark laugh, Sam’s hand reappeared and settled on Dean’s hip, stilling the movement. “Shh. If you can’t be quiet, you’ll wake Jo.” Dean rolled over to face Sam, his eyes wide and a little wild.

“Please. Let’s go upstairs and finish this.”

“Why not here?”

“Because I really don’t want to wake her up. But, God, I want you. Please, Sam. Take me upstairs. Fuck me, please.” Every sentence had been punctuated with Dean kissing his way up Sam’s throat. She had to close her eyes against the sight as Dean’s eagerness washed over her. It was all she could do to keep her eyes shut and her traitorous body still. Sam gave another dark laugh, “Alright. If you want it that badly. Take the pillows up with you, I’ll grab the sheets. And Dean,” there was a startled gasp that ended in a soft moan. Cracking her eyes, she could see Sam leaned over Dean’s neck. Dean’s eyes were closed and his mouth was slack, the arm around Sam’s back was shaking. Sam released his hold and ran his cheek along Dean’s. His growled whisper drifted over to her, “I want you naked when I get there.” Dean scrambled to his feet, grabbing the pillows as he stood, his muscular chest glowing gold in the firelight. Any doubts on how much he was enjoying himself were gone since his still open jeans perfectly framed his erection. This was it; she was going to burst into flame. Sam looked up from gathering the sheets and right at her. Behind her now closed eyes, Jo prayed. Don’t let him have seen me, don’t let him have seen me. Dean was already up the stairs but Sam stood over Jo a moment before following. When his footsteps disappeared at the top of the stairs, Jo let out the ragged breath she’d been holding to keep still and rolled onto her back. She put one hand over her mouth and the other between her legs. Already she was inflamed and slick. Her whole body was pulsing with desire. It only took a couple rough strokes and the world exploded. She sucked in a huge breath and had to block all air to keep from screaming as she bucked and arched into her own touch. Holy God! I should be sickened, disgusted, not having the hardest orgasm of my life, but OH GOD….. Her thoughts trailed off into want as the waves rushed through her. After the feeling and aftershocks finally faded, she rolled onto her other side and hugged her knees to her chest. She had to; anything else would have her walking up those stairs.