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Cowboy Like Me

Summary:

Blackbeard is the greatest rodeo man of all time. The Gentleman Cowboy was raised riding dressage and knows nothing of the rodeo scene, but joins anyway. After Stede Bonnet gets bucked off, Edward Teach decides to teach him how to barrel race.

OR

Two cowboys fall in love.

Notes:

hey!!! i hope everybody enjoys this. the idea was sparked by @DevinDivineArt’s cowboy au art 🫶

a few disclaimers:
- i ride horses so some of my terms might be a little more technical than those would like,, just ask if you’re confused
- i do NOT barrel race or ride dressage so idk if what i say abt them is accurate
- also don’t know much abt the rodeo scene soo
- loosely based on brokeback mountain

slight tw for mention of animal abuse!!!

Chapter 1: The Gentleman Cowboy

Chapter Text

Stede Bonnet needed out, he needed to get away from his life. He was uncomfortable in a married state. He was forced into marriage, forced to procreate. His wife had money, so marrying her felt more like a corporate deal than an actual marriage. They might have been legally married, but they didn’t feel married. They ate dinner at different times, his wife was gone most nights, he spent time elsewhere while she cared for the kids. He didn’t know her and she didn’t know him. It wasn’t a marriage, there was no love. Stede needed to be someone else, he needed to reinvent himself. And so he did. 

 

“Next up is Stede Bonnet… the Gentleman Cowboy, riding Revenge!” an announcer boomed into the mic. Stede was a rodeo man now. He had left his wife and bought a horse. She was a cute, thirteen hands tall mare named Sarah, but her show name was Revenge .

Stede Bonnet may have been new to the rodeo scene, but he was not a stranger to riding horses. When he was a child, he had many horses that lived on the land his father owned. His mother Sarah (who he named his horse after) taught him dressage; a beautiful, calm style of riding, where the main goal was to make your horse look flexible and obedient. The rodeo was nothing like that. 

The rodeo was a harsh place full of harsh people. There was never a day without broken bones, and after the events were over and all the cowboys went to the bars, it almost always ended in a fight, or three. The biggest rodeo event was the most dangerous: bull riding. It was a violent sport where a rider would mount a bucking bull and attempt to stay on for as long as possible. The longer the time the better. The rider usually lasted an average of five seconds on the bull before being promptly thrown off. This was not what Stede did.

Stede engaged in a slightly less dangerous sport: barrel racing. Here, the shorter the time the better. A rider’s goal was to maneuver their horse around three barrels as fast as possible. It was a thrilling thing to do and the complete opposite of the fancy, elegant style of dressage he was used to.

Stede was not very good at barrel racing.

As music played on the speakers, Revenge strolled into the arena, picking her hooves up high. It was the correct gait – a canter – but insanely slow. The crowd looked shocked and confused. Stede, who was wearing an all white outfit, looked very happy. Revenge calmly turned around each barrel, prancing. and then went out the gate one baby step at a time. It was the worst time anyone had ever seen. 4:35. Stede was practically booed out of the arena.

“That was amazing, girl! Hell yeah!” Stede patted Sarah’s neck. She hadn’t even broken a sweat; every horse they walked past that already showed had.

Stede walked Sarah into her stall and handed her to Lucius. He quickly unbridled her and put on her fancy, bejeweled halter before shooting a glance towards Black Pete, who looked very disappointed.

”What?” Stede asked. He was very confused as to what he did wrong.

“That was horrible,” Lucius retorted.

“That was great! She looked so good!”

“This isn’t fucking dressage, Stede! You’re not trying to look pretty, you’re trying to go around those barrels as fast as possible. You set a new all time worst record today with four minutes and thirty-five seconds. It’s honestly embarrassing for me as Sarah’s trainer. People aren’t going to respect me in this industry,” Black Pete snapped. He cared very much about his reputation, and was specifically trying to impress the greatest barrel racer out there today — and debatably of all time — Blackbeard. Stede might’ve just ruined that by putting on a fucking dressage show. Pete stormed off.

“I didn’t think—”

“--clearly. Groom your horse, Stede. I’ll talk to him.” Lucius shoved a brush into Stede’s hand and ran after Black Pete. Stede watched sadly as Lucius put a hand on Pete’s shoulder and as Pete shrugged him off, visibly angry.

Stede thought he was a horrible cowboy. Maybe this wasn’t the life for him after all.




Laughter erupted in the air, glasses clinked. Tonight was another buzzing night at Jackie’s, the best bar to go to after a day at the rodeo. Blackbeard was surrounded by a group of men listening to him tell a story about the time he worked a pony who couldn’t stop bucking him off. 

“I had to put my fuckin’ spurs on! The little shit was so annoying. That’s why I say never trust a fuckin’ pony, they’re the damn devil’s spawn.” Blackbeard’s southern accent was heavy when he had whiskey in his body. He sounded like he was straight out of a western. The people around him thought it made him seem all the more rugged and scary, like he would pull a gun out and challenge anyone to a duel at any moment.

Someone at some point ordered another round of shots. Blackbeard downed three.

“Hey, we bought one shot for everybody, you can’t have three!” a man yelled.

Blackbeard drunkenly tossed two shot glasses towards the noise. One hit the post above the man, glass shattered down onto his cowboy hat. The other hit him in the nose, causing it to bleed and most likely be broken. “I can do whatever the hell I fuckin’ please, asshole.”

The man didn’t bother engaging in the fight any more. He suddenly realized why everyone was so scared of Blackbeard. He was violent and ruthless, and if the rumors were true, he wasn’t particularly kind to his horses, either. 

“Don’t you think that was a bit much, Edward?” a nice looking guy with a big white beard named Fang asked. He was a trainer that worked for Blackbeard. He also bred sheep dogs. The man next to him was Ivan, a groom for Blackbeard. He took care of the horses and was a nice man. The final person in this quartet was Izzy Hands, who was about as feared as Blackbeard himself. He was known for his harsh work tactics and his poor treatment of his horses. In the past, he was a popular bull rider, but after he met Blackbeard, all he ever did was follow him around.

“Wasn’t harsh at all, Fang. Remember your place,” Izzy snapped. He had a habit of doing this, answering for Edward. It bothered no one but Fang and Ivan, who thought if Edward wanted to say something, he should say it himself. They’d never say this to Edward or to Izzy with fear of being reprimanded. Though Blackbeard thought he preferred to be spoken for. Words and thoughts and emotions were hard for him. 

Suddenly, the entire bar went quiet, and, almost as if they were programmed zombies, they turned to look at the same corner of the room at once. Standing in the doorway was a man in fancy white rodeo gear with two men trailing behind him. “Hey, y’all!” the fancy looking man called out.

“Izzy, who the hell is that?” Edward asked quietly. He knew everybody in the industry, but he didn’t know this guy.

“Name’s Stede Bonnet, goes by the Gentleman Cowboy. He was a privileged little rich boy whose mommy taught him dressage. He brought that to the show ring today and now has the all time worst record with four minutes and thirty-five seconds.”

“Fuckin’ hell. He’s insane.” Edward didn’t say that like it was a bad thing, though, more like he admired the amount of balls it would have taken to do dressage in front of a barrel racing crowd.

Secretly, Edward always wanted to try dressage. It was so beautiful and so fancy, but he would be the laughing stock of the rodeo scene if he did. Rugged cowboys weren’t fancy. Edward Teach wasn’t fancy. It would never be him.

Edward watched him; watched how the man sauntered into a crowd of unfriendly people after making a career-ending move like he owned the place; watched how he attempted conversation with a few men; watched how he dodged their flying glasses; watched how he looked nervous when the glass hit someone else and a bar fight broke out as if that was an unfamiliar sight; and watched how he ignored the fight and walked over to the bar and ordered a margarita as if he was a regular. Every move he made, it shocked and equally intrigued Edward.

“What’s his horse’s name?” Edward asked, eyes still glued on the man.

“Revenge,” answered Izzy.

“Who’s it related to?”

“No one special. She’s a rescue.” Izzy huffed, obviously annoyed with Edward’s questioning.

“Fascinating,” breathed Edward. No one in this industry got a rescue, or if they did, it certainly wasn’t a show horse. Selective breeding was highly valued with professional riders. You wanted a horse with the best traits, so people typically bred famous horses. Everybody’s horse had a famous relative, that was how it worked. 

Edward’s staring was cut short when a woman in a crop top and short shorts put a hand on his shoulder and sat down beside him. He feigned interest.




Stede sipped lightly on his drink and scanned the room. The place smelled of sweat and dirt and alcohol, the loud buzz of conversation and music was overwhelming. A couple tables down, a woman splashed a drink in a man’s face and told him he’s an asshole. Across the room, a fight broke out. In the corner, a tall man slammed his fist into the jukebox in hopes that the machine would take his money and play his favorite song. Near the bathrooms, a man and a woman made out. And in the middle, amidst all the chaos, was a man with brown skin, long salt and pepper hair, and a big curly beard talking to a scantily clad woman and looking wildly uncomfortable. He wore black western pants, a tight purple shirt that perfectly outlines his muscular chest, and a black cowboy hat. His right arm was filled to the brim with tattoos, it was draped over his chair. A cigarette was between his fingers, his hand was half covered by fingerless gloves. His left leg crossed over his right leg, where a knee brace was tightened on his knee. He had two knives on both sides of his hips. Something lurched in Stede’s stomach as he examined the cowboy. Whoever he was, Stede wanted to know more.

“Pete, who’s that?” Stede whisper-yelled over a Hank Williams song playing in the background.

“Stede, you don’t want to know who he is,” Lucius interjected.

“It’s fine, honey. That right there is Blackbeard. He’s the best barrel racer of all time and is a damn good bull rider too,” Black Pete explained.

“Yeah and he’s also a horrible person. He starts fights for fun and is an asshole to everybody he meets. There’s also rumor he mistreats his horses. Don’t ever talk to him, Stede,” Lucius warned.

“That’s just rumor . I met Blackbeard once at a show up in Wisconsin. He would kill for his horses. I bet the Badmintons started that rumor. Don’t believe everything you hear, Luce. The other stuff though? All true. He’s a huge asshole. I told him how much of an inspiration he was to me and he spat on the ground and said, ‘How’s that for inspiration?’ Although the one next to him is an even bigger dick.” Pete pointed to the short, angry looking man beside the cowboy. 

At some point during Pete’s rambling, Stede zoned out. He had become focused on Blackbeard and all of his actions.

Stede watched him; watched how Blackbeard downed a glass of whiskey and slammed it back on the table; watched how Blackbeard moved away from the woman beside him; watched how a shirtless cowboy walked up to Blackbeard; watched how Blackbeard turned his body towards the man; watched how upon doing so his muscles relaxed; watched how the woman angrily walked away; watched how the man sat down besides Blackbeard and touched his shoulder and Blackbeard leaned closer into him, looked him up and down, and smiled; watched how Blackbeard bought him and drink; and watched how they spoke for a few minutes before leaving together. 

Lucius laughed but Stede didn’t get the joke. Lucius and Black Pete gave each other a look, they were speaking a language Stede didn’t understand.

Blackbeard didn’t seem like such the asshole they were making him out to be. He seemed like a sweet guy, really. He was very friendly with both the man and the woman, even if the latter seemed to make him uncomfortable with how touchy she was. The Blackbeard Lucius described would’ve thrown a glass in both their faces. Stede wanted to know this Blackbeard.

 

 

“Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the fearsome Blackbeard riding The Kraken !” the announcer boomed into the mic, dragging out the horse’s name. 

Blackbeard had a stunning black stallion that stood about sixteen hands. The Kraken’s father was named Oceanus, and he was insanely fast. He and his rider previously held the record for fastest ever barrel race before Blackbeard and The Kraken beat it. This was why good genes paid off.

The Kraken burst out of the gate and sped across the arena like a streak of black. He turned tightly around barrel number one and darted to barrel number two, which he cleared like a champ. Streak of black. Tight turn around barrel three and then The Kraken raced faster than the speed of light out the gate.

Thirteen seconds. Blackbeard just set a new world record, previously held by him with sixteen seconds.

There was a round of celebrations at Jackie’s that night. Blackbeard had made history again.





The next day was the final day of the rodeo events. Today was Challenge Day. Everything was the same, except the riders didn’t get to choose who they rode. It was the luck of the draw.

Blackbeard rode first. He hit it out of the park with a twenty second run on a horse named Queen Anne. 

The man who rode Revenge was next. She did everything like a dressage horse, until the man on top of her began kicking her with his spurs. Suddenly, Revenge burst forward, not happily, and the pair got a time of 1:18. He looked very pissed when he dismounted. 

Lastly, it was Stede’s turn. He was given a big gelding named Royal James. It was daunting, but Stede felt up for the challenge. He tightened his fingers on the reins. Royal James did not like that. He lurched forward and began bucking so much someone would’ve mistaken this for a bull ride. Stede tightened his fingers more and pulled back and that was it, Royal James gave him one last good buck before Stede went flying into one of the barrels.

The crowd gasped as one. They hadn’t seen a barrel race go this badly in a long time.

Blackbeard jumped over the railing and ran over to Stede as someone caught Royal James. He knelt down beside the man and nudged his arm, checking for consciousness.

“The Gentleman Cowboy, I reckon?”

Stede looked up, shocked. “You’ve heard of me?”

“Oh, I’ve heard all about you.”

Chapter 2: See Ya Around, Cowboy

Summary:

Ed visits Stede in the hospital after his accident.

Notes:

heyy!! here’s chapter two! it’s a short one, just some development.

more disclaimers i missed last time:
- it takes place in the united states but i don’t really have a specific state in mind, probably texas or kentucky 🤷
- there’s also not a specific time period but i see it as mid-late 1900s? i know mobile phones will not come into play so

tw for mild homophobia, also tw for hospitals

Chapter Text

Stede came to in a bright room where the lights buzzed like cicadas in summer heat. A woman in baby blue scrubs and her hair tied in a bun set a pudding cup on a table beside his bed. Except–

It wasn’t his bed.

He was in the hospital. His left arm was in a sling. Stede groaned as he shifted under the thin white blanket covering him.

“Hey, look who’s up!” the woman said sweetly. “Here’s some pudding and your pills, don’t forget to take them.”

“What’s wrong with me? Why am I here?” Stede croaked. His throat burned.

“You have a concussion, so you’ll be taking it easy in here for a little while. Also your arm is broken, so try not to move it around too much. You might experience headaches, nausea, dizziness, blurry vision, problems with memory, et cetera. If you have any symptoms, let us know, alright? Take care, hon.” She had a sweet Southern accent and a nice smile. Stede nodded to let her know he understood and she left.

He closed his eyes in an attempt to calm the pounding in his head. It didn’t work and it especially didn’t help when there was a knock on his door. “Come in,” Stede called out begrudgingly. 

The door opened and in walked a man wearing a tight black shirt, a black cowboy hat, and silver necklaces that rattled when he moved. His beard was curly and big, his hair was long and gray. He was beautiful.

“Do I know you?” Stede asked. Memory problems...





Hours previous, Edward knelt beside Stede in the dirt, Stede’s white rodeo gear had turned a light brown from his fall. “Are you Blackbeard?” Stede muttered. He was in pain, but curiosity forced him to stay conscious a little longer. 

Edward chuckled. He’d honestly never been asked that before, nobody second guessed when they saw Blackbeard. “Yeah. Yeah I am.” Edward locked eyes with Stede and smiled. Though his smile faltered when he noticed Stede’s head was lolling back and his eyes were closing, he was losing consciousness. Edward’s dirty fingers picked nervously at his lips, his jaw tightened. His eyes anxiously scanned Stede’s body, he looked for a way to help him. 

“Come on, pal. Stay awake a bit.” Edward sat Stede up and leaned him against his right leg. His hands tapped Stede’s face lightly, his head swiveled around, looking for paramedics. They were nowhere to be found.

Carefully, Edward brushed Stede’s hair back where it had fallen into his eyes and picked up his white cowboy hat. Then he put his right arm around Stede’s chest and the other under his knees and slowly lifted him.


“What the fuck’s he doin’?” Izzy, watching from the stands, muttered angrily to Ivan and Fang.

“He’s helpin’ that guy out,” Ivan said.

“Yeah no shit, I have eyes. But why’s he helping out the fucking dressage pansy?” Izzy huffed. Blackbeard shouldn’t be caring. Blackbeard should’ve been laughing at the Gentleman Cowboy from afar. Instead, Blackbeard held the Gentleman Cowboy in his arms. The fucking Gentleman Cowboy of all people.

Edward rushed out of the arena, he tried to keep his frantic running to a minimum, so as not to jostle Stede’s body too much. After much searching, he found the paramedics standing by the warm up ring. He called for one of them and they came to him quickly. “He was thrown from Royal James into a barrel.” The man gestured towards a stretcher, Edward gently laid Stede down onto it. 

Paramedics rushed back and forth, trying to figure out what was wrong with Stede while maneuvering him around people and things towards an ambulance. Edward grabbed one of their arms. “Why weren’t y’all out there. Y’all was real fuckin’ irresponsible with this.” His grip tightened, he huffed.

“Sorry, sir, we weren’t aware someone had been thrown.”

Edward let go of the person’s arm, poison in his eyes as he glared. “Y’all better get your shit together, ya hear? Someone coulda gotten real injured out here. Do your damn job better next time, dickheads!” He stormed off, shoving some guy out of the way who was too afraid to cuss him out for that because it was Blackbeard for god’s sake.





“Probably. Everyone knows me.” Edward walked forward with his thumbs in his front pockets, the soft clunk of his cowboy boots drowned out the cicada-lights humming with every step he took. The man exuded confidence, but in a very self-conscious way, like he was compensating for his insecurities. Stede’s eyes trailed him as he dragged a chair that was against the wall over to his hospital bed and sat down. He crossed his left leg over his right.


Stede pushed himself into a sitting position with his good arm and gave an I-didn’t-get-the-punchline smile. “Cool introduction, but I don’t think I know you.”

“Shame. You knew me yesterday.” Deep down, Edward was glad Stede didn’t know who he was. Maybe for once he could have a friend. Blackbeard didn’t have friends, but maybe Edward could. Maybe Stede could be his first. Stede had no preconceived notions of who Edward was, he could reinvent himself right here, right now.

“Oh. I’m sorry. The nurse told me I might experience problems with memory. Are we friends?”

“Nah. We ain’t friends.” But maybe we could be.

“Okay. Well, unless we’re enemies, maybe we could be friends. I’m Stede Bonnet,” Stede smiled and outstretched his hand. Edward returned the favor, with a smile and with a hand. They shook hands, a way too formal method of greeting for this oddly casual setting, visiting someone in the hospital after an injury. Edward shook his hand firmly, like he was embracing a friend. Stede’s hands were soft, not yet calloused from working a particularly tough horse. Edward’s hands were worn, they told stories.

“Name’s Edward Teach. Friends call me Ed.” No one called him Ed.

He awkwardly pulled his hand back into his lap, at some point a handshake had to end.

“Can I call you Ed?” Stede asked softly.

“Yes,” Ed answered tenderly. Stede seemed to be shaping up to be a friend already. 

“Well, Ed, can I ask why you’re here?”

“I was there when you were thrown.” Royal James, Stede remembered that. “I helped you find paramedics. I just wanted to make sure you were alright.”

Stede smiled. “I’m alright, thank you for checking up on me.” Stede expected Ed to get up right there, but he didn’t. If anything, he relaxed more into his chair, like the conversation was just getting started.

“Can I ask you a question?” Ed cocked his head to the side, examining Stede.

“Of course,” he replied hesitantly. 


“Why’d ya decide to join the rodeo?”





Stede sat across the dinner table from his wife and kids. “Mary,” Stede said.

“Yeah?” Mary didn’t look up at Stede, her eyes focused on cleaning up the mess their youngest made of himself, food on his cheek.

“What if we took the kids to see the rodeo?”

“They don’t want to see that, Stede.”

“Why not?”

“It’s dangerous. It’ll make them think our horses will buck them off like that.”

“Okay.”

The room returned to silence, and despite being in a room with three people who supposedly loved him, Stede never felt more alone and unseen than now. 

   

 

“I wanted to do something different,” Stede answered Ed’s question.

“And what were you doing before?” Ed knew what he was doing before, but it would be weird to tell Stede that.

“Nothing.” Nevermind.

“You’ve never ridden a horse before barrel racing?”

“No. When I was a little kid I rode dressage.”

“That’s cool,” Ed said sincerely, and Stede smiled the way a child smiles when their mother says they like their drawing of scribbles.. No one’s ever called his dressage cool before. He’s always been ridiculed for it, called names inside of jokes where he didn’t get the punchline. Right now, he felt appreciated and seen. Ed smiled back, he felt warm inside.

“Do you ride?”

Ed held back a laugh. This man truly knew nothing about him, and it was amazing. “Yeah. I barrel race.”

“You probably think I’m a fool like everyone else, then.”

Ed sat forward in his chair and shook his head. “Nah. I don’t think you’re a fool. I think you’re insane and possibly way in over your head, but in a good way. I think you could shape up to be a great barrel racer if you wanted to.”

Stede smiled again, Ed felt warm again. “You’re too kind. I really do hope I improve.”

Ed chuckled quietly. “Yeah. Maybe you need a teacher.” 

Stede examined Ed; he watched as Ed looked down and fidgeted with the hands lying in his lap and he noticed how Ed looked like he was waiting for something, like his statement was an attempt at nudging Stede towards the words he wanted to hear. “Maybe you could teach me.”

That was it. Ed’s head shot up and he held back a goofy grin, instead switching it out for a friendly smile. “Maybe I could,” Ed said casually, attempting to stifle his excitement.

“Will you?” Stede said it so tenderly, and they caught each other’s bright eyes. Ed’s stomach lurched. He was making a friend for probably the first time in his life and it just so happened to be the insane man that the people around him couldn’t stand. Izzy wasn’t going to be happy, but Ed didn’t give a fuck, because right here, he was happy, and Isreal Hands could do nothing about it.

Ed nodded eagerly. “Yeah, ‘course. Stop by anytime.” He wrote down his address on the first piece of paper he saw.

“I’ll come by when my arm is better. Promise.”

“You technically don’t need two hands. This isn’t your fancy little dressage. I’ve got good horses. If you’re up for the challenge, come by earlier.” Ed didn’t know how to phrase that without sounding like he wanted to see Stede again as soon as possible. All he could do was hope that Stede was oblivious enough to not catch on, which he was.

“I’ll do that then. Can’t wait.”

Ed’s stomach lurched again, butterflies flying around. No one has been eager to spend time with Blackbeard before, people only feared him. The only thing they got excited about was possibly learning a thing or two from the best barrel racer of all time, but they could care less about his company. And maybe that’s all Stede was in it for, too. Being taught. Though Ed thought that regardless of why Stede would be visiting in the coming days, he at least didn’t fear him.

Ed stood up and outstretched a hand, closing off the interaction the same way it began, with a firm handshake. The closest thing to an embrace right now. “Get better soon, I’ll see ya around, cowboy.” Ed tipped his hat like a proper gentleman and left the room, leaving Stede feeling elated. 

Chapter 3: Long Time No See, Cowboy

Summary:

ed teaches stede how to barrel race. he also stays for dinner.

Notes:

hello i know it has been about a week but cowboy like me is back!!!! thank u to everyone that has supported this it means a lot. pls lmk if you have any suggestions for this story, they truly are very helpful. and i appreciate everyone that leaves a kudos and a comment, it rlly motivates me to continue this.

also sorry for sm horse talk it will only get worse in coming chapters but after the whole teaching thing is done it will be better.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Two days later.

 

“Sorry, who visited you in the hospital?” Lucius and Black Pete were talking to Stede at their farm, who was telling them about the nice man he met a couple days earlier. 

“His name is Edward Teach, how many times do I have to say that? He offered to teach me how to barrel race like a proper cowboy!” 

“That’s so cool…” Pete whispered to himself.

Lucius lightly hit his arm with the back of his hand. “No! Not cool. Stede, do you not know who Edward Teach is?”

Stede took a bite of the toast with marmalade he was eating and walked around the island in the kitchen towards Lucius. “Yes, I know who he is! He’s the very nice man who, dare I might say, is my friend. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to change. He asked me to stop by,” Stede argued through a mouthful.

“Edward Teach doesn’t have friends. Are you hearing yourself? You’re gonna get yourself hurt,” Lucius said sternly.

“He does too! He told me himself that his friends call him Ed. So , once again, I’m going to change.”

Lucius scoffed and rolled his eyes. He couldn’t believe it.

“Stede, do you think you could say something to Blackbeard about me?” Black Pete asked.

“Who’s Blackbeard?”

“You had a concussion and don’t remember, right…” Lucius mumbled to himself. He sighed. “He’s a horrible person. He’s rude to everyone he meets – except you apparently – and doesn’t treat his horses well. Honestly, he probably made a shitty bet with one of his goons that follows him around that he could rope you into coming over, and is probably just planning to get you hurt. Please tell me you’ll stay clear of him.”

Stede went wide-eyed and for a second his heart sunk. He couldn’t believe he was being tricked. Though as much as he trusted Lucius, he felt like he knew Ed was being genuine. Something about the way Ed looked at him and the way Ed shook his hand so firmly but without squeezing and the way Ed smiled; it all seemed way too friendly to be an act. Despite this, he had to believe his friend. Lucius might be right. “I promise.” 


----------

 

Today Stede wasn’t riding, but he wanted to visit the rodeo anyway. He thought it’d be good to get involved in the culture, and who knows, he might even make a friend while he’s at it.

In between a barrel racing class and a bull ride, there was an unusual event. Two men by the name of Wee John and Frenchie put on a pony show. It was like a dog show with ponies; they ran through a course and jumped over obstacles with the two men leading them through. It was a fun sight to see, and despite the crowd supposedly being super tough, they thoroughly enjoyed it just as much as Stede did.

At the end, both men introduced the ponies they ran with.

Wee John went first. He was a tall, stocky man with tattoos along his brow bone. He looked very intimidating, but Stede thought he probably wasn’t as scary as he seemed. To back up that claim, when he spoke he had a kind voice. Frenchie, the lanky curly haired man beside him, spoke next. He, too, seemed nice.

“Also, if there’s any little kiddos in the audience that want to come pet the ponies we will be set up outside. It'll be five dollars per kid,” Frenchie said into the microphone. 

John took the mic away from him and chuckled nervously. “Please do not give Frenchie money. He may be a pony trainer but he is also a con man. We are not selling pets. Do not listen to him.” He handed the microphone back to a judge before Frenchie could say anymore. 

As they walked out of the arena, he hit John’s shoulder lightly and a friendly argument struck up that eventually erupted into laughter. Stede thought they’d make good friends, so he went to talk to them where they were set up. With the amount of ponies that they had, they took up an entire row of stalls.

“Hello, everyone. I very much enjoyed your show,” Stede greeted.

“Oh you’re the Gentle… whatever, right? The one that rode Royal James?” Frenchie asked.

“Gentleman Cowboy. That’s me!” Stede put on a confident smile.

“I like your horse. Revenge, is it?” Wee John added.

Stede’s eyebrows rose, surprised yet glad someone paid enough attention to remember his horse’s name. “Yes! Love that ole girl.” A pause. “Do you guys do this often?”

“The pony show? Yeah. We’ve settled here for the past year but back when we only had about five ponies we would travel lots of places. We’d also go to fairs and set up as petting zoos and give pony rides.”

“That’s when we actually got paid for this shit,” Frenchie joked. Sort of. 

Stede laughed. He enjoyed talking to them, and continued to do so for another thirty minutes as he was introduced to each of their ponies. By the end of the conversations, Wee John and Frenchie were his friends. There were finally two less rodeo men that thought he was a fool.


----------

Edward was bored out of his mind. The rodeo scene had gotten dull lately, especially for him. He was avoided by most people who would rather steer clear than risk Blackbeard’s wrath, and the only time he got attention was from drunk people at the bars, though they weren’t really interested in him. Most people just wanted advice or sex. He never gave advice, he sometimes gave sex. Nothing meant anything. Getting with someone for a quick fuck who wanted you because you were hot and not because they wanted you wasn’t working for him anymore.

Edward needed something different. He needed to ride new horses and try new things. He needed to be around different people, people who weren’t afraid of him, people who didn’t just want riding advice, people who didn’t just want sex. He needed Stede. Stede.

Stede was all of these things wrapped into one. Stede was different and insane and weird in a good way. Stede was kind, that was different. Even if most people at the rodeo weren’t Blackbeard and Izzy Hands level mean, they weren’t exactly nice either. Most people were competitive assholes who didn’t have anything better to do with their lives than start shit. 

He needed to find Stede.

Stede was over by a food stand and he thankfully wasn’t talking to anyone. There was a bull ride going on, but Stede didn’t seem interested. He was alone and unoccupied. Ed decided to slide his way in.

Ed walked up to him and the people around them stared hesitantly. The rodeo crowd may not have liked the Gentleman Cowboy, but they weren’t going to feed him to the wolf that was Blackbeard. Blackbeard was ruthless, and just because some poor guy couldn’t barrel race for shit doesn’t mean he needed to deal with Blackeard. 

But Blackbeard wasn’t here. Ed flashed a smile. “Hey, Cowboy. How’s your arm?”

Stede’s eyes widened upon hearing Ed’s voice and he took a small step back. He wasn’t actually scared of Ed, but he trusted Lucius, and he’d rather be safe than sorry. Whatever happened, Stede wouldn’t be tricked into anything, and he wouldn’t put up with any rudeness from Blackbeard. He was putting his foot down.

“Still broken, thanks.”

Ed frowned slightly at Stede’s sudden impolite tone. Where’d the nice Stede go? “Feelin’ up to ride?” He figured he could still attempt conversation.

Stede needed to be straight forward. If he didn’t play games, he couldn’t allow himself to be played. “I’m not going to your farm, Edward.”

Ed’s heart crushed for two reasons. One, he was really looking forward to teaching the Gentleman Cowboy how to barrel race. And two, Stede said Edward, not Ed like he had previously… the name his friends called him.

Stede began walking away, Ed walked with him. He wasn’t going to let this go. “Uh, Stede, may I ask why?”

“I’ve heard about your reputation.” They both stopped.

Shit, Ed thought. Damn reputation always got in the way. To his crew, it was what gained him power, but power wasn’t the same thing as respect. To the rodeo crowd, it was all they knew. And to the kind man in front of him, it was what might ruin his chance at an actual friendship.

“Don’t you want a teacher?” Ed didn’t want to give this up, and he could tell Stede didn’t want to either. 

Stede sighed. His foot was less down now. It was more lightly touching the ground. “Yes. I still want you to teach me but I want you to teach me how to do it on my horse. Would you like to come to my place?” There was that kind, polite, tender tone again. It made Ed smile.

“Yeah, sounds great. Do you have a piece of paper you could write your address down on?” Ed felt around his pockets, finding a pen. “Here, you can use this to write.”

“Ah, no, I don’t have paper. You don’t?”

“Why would I need to carry around paper?”

“Why do you carry around a pen?”

Ed paused his search. “Fair point.” He huffed.

A metaphorical lightbulb went off above Stede’s head. His cowboy hat. Ed’s was black, so the pen wouldn’t show, but it would show on his own white hat. He took it off, and on the inside, wrote his address.

Ed was shocked that Stede would write on his expensive looking hat like it was nothing. “There you go.” Stede handed Ed the hat and his pen. He looked more bare and less fancy now, but Ed thought Stede looked significantly cuter with his golden curls on display. Though he couldn’t leave Stede empty handed and himself with two hats. 

“Here…” Ed grabbed the black cowboy hat off his head and put it onto Stede’s. He stepped back, admiring Stede. “It looks good on you. Maybe black is your color.”

Stede blushed and watched as Ed put on his white cowboy hat now that his head was free. “And white looks good on you.”

Ed bit the inside of his cheek to stop from smiling like a fool. “Thank you,” he muttered quietly. Maybe we’d look good in each other’s clothes. “What time should I come ‘round?” Stede liked how thick his accent was. God, he was fully forgetting every rule he set for himself, his foot was floating now.

“How’s six work?”

“Sounds perfect, but you better feed me.”

“I think I can manage that.”

They smiled, enjoying each other’s company more than they probably should.

“Good. I’ll see you then, Cowboy.”

“See you then, Ed.” Ed. Stede called him Ed and he couldn’t stop from smiling anymore.

Ed wanted to stay for so much longer. He wanted to sit here and talk to Stede forever, but there were things to do. Being a famous rodeo man was tiring work. He held out his hand, and Stede took it. And just like in the hospital, they shook hands as if it were an embrace before leaving.


----------

Ed made his way back to where The Kraken’s stall was at the rodeo facility, where Ivan and Fang groomed him for an upcoming event, where Izzy Hands watched and read over the event schedule. Shit. Ed suddenly remembered there were many events tonight, one of which would get him and The Kraken qualified for the championship events. Blackbeard and The Kraken always qualified for the championship events, and they always won the championship events. He couldn’t miss this. But Stede…

On second thought, he could most definitely miss this. Blackbeard didn’t need to be riding, The Kraken just had to be in the show ring. Edward clasped a hand on Izzy’s shoulder. “Need to talk to you, pal.”

Izzy, confused both at Edward’s new hat that oddly resembled the Gentleman Pirate’s and at his friendly manner of speaking, stood up and followed Edward. “What is it, Edward? And what’s with that stupid fuckin’ hat?”

Edward’s brows furrowed. I like this hat a lot, thank you very much. He elected to ignore the insult. “Do ya think you could get Jeff qualified for the championship tonight?” Jeff was what The Kraken was called at home.

“No, you know I don’t show. I train him at home, that’s it.”

“You got this, Iz! You’ll do great.” Edward added an encouraging smile and a pat to Izzy’s arm. That was different…

“Why can’t you do it? What the fuck are you doing?”

“I’m… going somewhere. Doesn’t matter.” Edward told Izzy more than most, but this he couldn’t tell Izzy about. He couldn’t risk it being ruined. 

“Yes it does fucking matter because whatever it is is for some reason more important than your fucking career!” Izzy’s voice was thick with annoyance.

“Jesus, Izzy, just get to the fuckin’ championship. Shouldn’t be that damn hard.” Edward hung his head, he couldn’t meet Izzy’s eyes. He needed this conversation to be over.

“Edward. Whose hat is that?” Silence. “ Blackbeard.” He finally looked up, anger in Izzy’s eyes. “Tell me it’s not…”

“Stede Bonnet’s hat. He gave me his address and there wasn’t any paper around so he wrote it in his hat. I’m teaching him how to barrel race. He has potential.”

“When have you ever fucking taught anyone. You’re fucking Blackbeard . People are supposed to beg at your boots for riding advice and you’re supposed to kick them over when they do. You can’t afford to teach people. What about your career, huh?”

Blackbeard now had the same anger in his eyes as he glared at Izzy. “I don’t fuckin’ care anymore. It’s getting boring. How many more records can I set? I’m doin’ this and I don’t give a rat’s ass what you think about it. You work for me and I am tellin’ you to ride that damn horse tonight and get him qualified. I’ll be at the fuckin’ championship.” Before Izzy could protest any longer, Blackbeard walked away, boots heavy on the ground.

“What’s his deal?” Ivan asked, to which Fang shrugged.

“He might be ruining his career for the Gentleman Cowboy…” Izzy replied.


----------

“Lucius! You are gonna hate me for this but I have news!” Stede excitedly barges into his house, calling out for Lucius.

Lucius was sitting on the couch in their living room. He gaped up at Stede, the black cowboy hat atop his head creating a major contrast between the rest of his light-colored outfit. He pointed his finger up at it, looking shocked. “What happened to your hat?”

“Oh, um, well, I gave my hat to Ed and he gave me his. Which, great segway into my news! He’s coming over tonight and teaching me how to ride. I thought that if you were right and he was planning to get me thrown, that it’d be better to do it on my horse. Sarah won’t do anything.”

Lucius’ brow furrowed, he gave Stede an unsure look. “I know how stubborn you are and that nothing will change your mind, but I don’t think this is a good idea. Respectfully.”

“It’s happening.”

Lucius sighed. “I know. Don’t get yourself killed.”

“I won’t.” That was the end of their conversation. Lucius wouldn’t waste his breath.


----------

 

An hour later.

 

Ed pulled into the long driveway and saw an odd looking man with a bird on his head sitting on the front porch. “Hey. Is uh… Is Stede here?”

“Say hello to Karl.” The man had a thick Scottish accent, something very odd to hear around these parts.

“Hiya Karl.” Ed waved to the bird, but looked back urgently to the man beneath the bird.

“The name’s Buttons. Who are ye?”

Ed sighed. “Ed. Is Stede here?” he asked again.

“Oh, yeah, Stede’s here.”

“Thank you.”

Ed walked up to the front door and knocked. Within thirty seconds it was opening to a very happy looking Stede with a big smile on his face. Ed’s heart jumped. He still had the black hat on and damn did it suit him.

“Long time no see, Cowboy,” Ed said sarcastically. He tipped his – Stede’s – hat like a gentleman the way he did days before.

“I see you’ve taken a liking to my hat,” Stede teased.

“I have. I don’t think I’ll give it back. Is being a thief not part of my reputation? ‘Cause that part’s true.”

Stede laughed at his joke and Ed’s heart jumped again. Suddenly, all Ed could think about was that he would become a jester for the Gentleman Cowboy if it offered him the chance to hear Stede laugh like that more. Breaking his trance, Stede shut the door and walked out onto the front porch beside Ed. 

“You can keep my hat if I can keep yours,” Stede said. 

“Hm, I don’t normally do trades but I think I can make an exception for you.”

They began walking out to the stables, their feet moving in time with each other.

“Something tells me this isn’t the first exception you’ve made for me.”

“And what do you mean by that, Cowboy?”

“Do you teach people often?”

“You’re my first.” Ed threw in a wink and a smile for extra flare.

“See?” 

Before Ed could come up with a snarky response, they entered Stede’s barn. There was only one horse, but there were many stalls. Stede flipped a switch and the long hall illuminated with light. There were maybe twenty stalls, give or take, two wash racks and a big open tack room. It was insane. Ed only had about six stalls, one wash rack, and a tiny tack room. Ed was surprised, confused, and jealous all at once. It was excessive, but he wished he could have the luxury of being excessive. Ed had only what was necessary, no matter his fame. 

Stede introduced him to Sarah, and together they groomed on her, teasing each other the entire time. It was nice, and felt very effortless. Stede was always made fun of for the way he rambled about different things, but Ed listened intently, commenting about how cool something he was describing was every once in a while. And Ed never had a friend before, let alone someone who wasn’t so fucking serious all the time and allowed him to let loose and have fun. It was new and different and exciting for the both of them, being here, talking. 


----------

Stede was on Revenge, he looked fancy up there. “Alright, just show me what you got,” Ed said to him, patting Sarah’s shoulder. Stede did just what he did in the show ring. Sarah pranced towards each barrel and turned slowly. She moved like a dressage horse, though perhaps a tad sloppier than normal because he only had one hand to control her.

“How was that?” Stede smiled brightly at Ed. He looked so happy it was hard for Ed to tell him the truth.

“It needs some work. You need to get out of the dressage mindset. Loosen up a little, pal,” Ed said as friendly as he could. “You’re using too much hand.”

Stede huffed, confused. “What do you mean?”

Ed walked over to Stede and placed the hands that told stories over Stede’s soft ones. Stede took a deep breath, staring not at his hands but at Ed’s face still shadowed by his white hat. Ed pulled the reins through Stede’s fingers until he was only holding a couple inches from the top. Stede glanced back at his hands to see Ed prying his fingers open softly. 

“Won’t she, um… How will she know where to go?” Stede choked out, catching his breath despite the fact that he was just sitting there.

“Use your legs. When barrel racing you want the fastest time but if you’re all up in her face she won’t go fast. That’s why you’re out there prancin’ around. You’re treatin’ her like you’re doing dressage.” Stede nodded, he appreciated the advice. Ed’s hands now moved to Stede’s leg, pushing his left calf into Sarah’s side. Sarah stepped to the right. “See? She’ll respond to your legs. The horse is not going to enjoy you being in their face, that’s why you got thrown.  Let go of your reins, try making a circle around me using just your legs. Use the other leg to stabilize her and get her to turn.”

Hesitantly, Stede set the rein on Sarah’s neck and clucked at her to move forward. She walked slowly, and, just like Ed showed him, he pressed his left calf into Sarah’s side and used his right one to push her shoulder. She turned around his left leg and made a tight circle around Ed. Stede removed his legs, said “woah”, and she stopped. 

Stede’s face lit up and in turn, so did Ed’s. Their eyes met and a jolt of electricity shot through them both. “You did it!” Ed exclaimed excitedly, patting Stede’s thigh.

Stede grabbed Ed’s hand between his thumb and pointer finger and joyously shook it. Their hands lingered together for a second longer than necessary before Ed removed his hand from Stede’s grasp and picked at his lips. “Now I just need to do that around the barrels.”

Ed nodded, stepping back. “Have at ‘em.”

Stede did that for a long while, though it wasn’t as easy as it seemed. They started slow, just walking around the barrels using body weight and legs only. Then, Ed convinced Stede to do it while trotting, which was a terrifying task because of how bouncy it was, but one that Stede accomplished, gaining him another pat on the thigh and an intoxicating smile from Ed. 

An hour passed. They worked until Stede could turn Sarah around the barrels while trotting without reins effortlessly. When that happened, Stede carefully dismounted, and before he knew it he was wrapped up in a hug from behind. Ed’s right arm was draped over his shoulder and his left was around his waist, holding him tight. His beard tickled Stede’s neck, their hats bumped slightly. “You’re amazing, Cowboy. Picked up quick as hell.”

Stede’s cheeks burned. “You’re a good teacher.”

Ed let go and gave Stede’s shoulders a quick clap before grabbing Sarah’s reins. “Oh shut up, I didn’t do nothin’, that was all raw talent from the Gentleman Cowboy.” Ed giggled. The fucking ruthless, rude cowboy that wore all black and was a menacing sight to see giggled. The fucking cowboy Stede was warned away from just hugged him like he was a friend he hadn’t seen in years, and then giggled.

He’s really not that scary, Stede thought. Stede also thought he wanted this to happen often, Ed teaching him and touching his legs and hands consistently, making Stede feel confused in the best way possible.

They went back into Sarah’s stall and groomed her together just like before. By the time they were done, it was dark, and definitely past the time the qualifying event Ed was supposed to be at. He prayed that Izzy listened to his orders.

Everything was closed up in the barn and it was completely dark except for the soft light in the tack room. Ed and Stede stood closer than two should. “I promised I’d feed you. Still want dinner? You can stay here if you like, I know it’s late.”

“Dinner sounds great, Cowboy. I think I’ll make myself at home here, I ain’t got nothin’ goin’ on tomorrow.”

“There’s still more of this place you haven’t seen.”

“Damn. The Gentleman Cowboy never rests. I look forward to seeing it.”

Stede smiled and switched off the light in the tack room. In time, they walked back up to his house, shoulders brushing as they walked and laughed together. Stede served Ed some pasta, which Ed remarked was “fuckin’ delicious, Cowboy,” and afterwards they drank whiskey before falling asleep in the living room, Stede on the couch and Ed draped over a chair, his knee brace halfway undone. Neither bothered to change clothes, but Ed at some point during their conversations had taken off the jacket he had on, leaving him in a tight black shirt. At one point in the night Ed had stretched and his shirt rode up, exposing his stomach and the hair that came with. Buzzed, Stede found himself staring at the patch of skin, though not drunk, he looked away before Ed could notice.

They talked about life, their insecurities, horses, what they did for fun, and anything else their brains conjured up. The warm buzz of whiskey loosened them both up; it was a good suggestion from Ed. They drank the expensive stuff, a gold rimmed bottle Ed only admired in the stores. It tasted damn good, and better yet, it helped Ed put his guard down. He wasn’t nervous when he spoke anymore.

The night was filled with laughter. Ed marked this night in his head as the first time he gained a friend, Stede marked this night in his head as the first time he could be himself.

Notes:

hey so i wanted this to be a lot longer than it was, despite it being the longest chapter yet. but i rlly wanted to put something out and writing has been hard. please let me know if u want to see ed and stede's dinner, i'm sure i could conjure something up for u all, though it would probably be short and mainly have a lot of dialogue.

Chapter 4: I Envy You, Cowboy

Summary:

they wake up, they get dressed

Notes:

hello so sorry about this taking so long to come out. i had eye surgery a little over a week ago and felt like shit and also had no motivation so there's that. this chapter was supposed to be really long but i felt like it would take another week to complete so i split it into two parts, hope u enjoy there's basically no plot to this. i'll try to have part 2 out in a timely manner lol

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Ed woke up before Stede. His body ached because of the uncomfortable sleeping position and the sun shining through the big window across from him made his head hurt. Slowly, he sat up to sit properly in the soft chair and took a deep breath.

Ed closed his eyes and listened to the sounds of birds outside chirping. They sang their beautiful songs to attract a mate like good sirens. Ed wished love for humans was that simple. Sing a song, get the girl – or guy in his case. Never before did Ed yearn for a mate of his own, but things were changing. He was changing. Maybe, along with the friendship thing, he’d want to try out the boyfriend thing. Just had to find the right person.

Stede shifted under a blanket on the couch that was clearly not meant for a grown man. Ed’s heart tapped on his brain and brought him back to reality, back to where he was in the room with Stede, who slept on the couch near him last night because he insisted Ed take the bed in his room but Ed didn’t want to and so they argued until they fell onto the couch together, alcohol slightly impairing their ability to walk. Or maybe they both unconsciously pretended to be more tipsy than they were so they could be closer than two new friends should with it still being okay. Ed knew that was the case for him, he could hold his liquor well and the only thing the alcohol did was make him feel more confident. But he thought maybe Stede’s tipsiness was genuine, because who would be that interested in Blackbeard.

Stede mumbled something in his sleep that Ed swore was his name, but he wasn’t sure. Ed hoped Stede would wake up soon, but he also hoped he’d stay asleep a little longer so Ed could continue admiring him without him knowing. The latter seemed to be the case, because Stede made no more movements. Ed leaned back in the chair and looked him over.

Stede’s hair was bright under the sun coming through the window, Ed’s hat had come off at some point in the night and was resting on Stede’s shoulder. He’d look damn good in the whole Blackbeard get-up, Ed thought. But he also thought the white suited him, even if it was sort of off-white now. His shirt, which Ed just noticed had jewels on it, was open slightly, exposing a bit of chest. The pants also had jewels on them, they sparkled under the light.
Ed took off Stede’s hat that was sitting on his head, and of course, there were jewels on it too. This was super fancy attire for barrel racing, and it must have been expensive, because the jewels looked real. Horses were so goddamn expensive that most rodeo men kept it simple. And most of the time, if you had fucking jewels on your outfit, it was frowned upon by the men. Stede Bonnet, you’re amazing.

A skinny pale man walked in, mumbling to himself – something like “Stede where are you?” – yet stopped abruptly as his eyes landed on Ed. “Uh… Sorry, sir, I- um, I didn’t know you were staying the night. So sorry, sir,” he blurted out.

Ed didn’t take his eyes off of Stede, who just moved while muttering something again. The black hat fell onto the floor. “It’s alright, pal. Call me Edward.”
“Uh, yes, of course, Edward. I’m Lucius. Not that you, uh, care. Sorry. I’ll leave now.”

Ed didn’t think he did anything wrong… so why was Lucius so afraid? Blackbeard. Fucking Blackbeard. Ed looked up and put on his friendliest smile, albeit a little awkward. He’d have to work on his friendly smiles. “It’s nice to meet you, Lucius.” He held out his hand.

Hesitantly, Lucius shook his hand. “Um… nice to meet you too.” He had no idea what was going on, or why he just walked in on Blackbeard staring intently – though not with hatred or anger and instead with some sort of infatuation – at his friend. Maybe even weirder, Blackbeard shook his hand like he was meeting a friend after years, and the smile that he was initially greeted with seemed a bit more genuine.

“Do you need us out of here? Apologies if it’s a bother. I didn’t know anyone else lived here.” No, this was the weirdest: Blackbeard was apologizing, and being considerate. He pushed a piece of silver hair back behind his ear and rubbed a hand down his beard. His eyes were no longer meeting Lucius’, but he didn’t look like he was plotting some evil plan. Honestly, he looked kind of…shy. Lucius couldn’t believe it.

“You’re not a bother.” And for some reason Lucius felt like he meant it. Edward looked up at him, he looked happy. “Would you like some breakfast?”

Edward waved a dismissive hand towards Lucius. “Nah, you don’t gotta do that for me.”

“Oh, no, I won’t be. We have a friend who makes meals. He’s an amazing chef.”

“Well I’d be delighted, thank you. I’ll wake Stede up.”

Lucius nodded and walked out of the room.

Finally, Ed got out of the chair he had claimed for the night. His body was aching and he couldn’t quite stand up yet, so he crawled the few feet to the couch next to Stede. He put a hand on Stede’s elbow, where his rolled up sleeves ended. “Wakey wakey, Cowboy.”

Stede grumbled, and with a few soft taps from Ed, he woke up. Ed’s face was only a foot away from his, if that, and Stede noticed for the first time that Ed had very pretty eyes. They were a beautiful dark brown and they looked at Stede like a siren calling for a victim. Stede happily swam towards them.

“Morning,” he mumbled. Ed took note that he liked Stede’s morning voice.

“Breakfast is being served.” Ed’s hand was still on Stede’s elbow, it felt like it was searing into his skin.

“Oh, that sounds wonderful,” Stede said in a much more cheery voice than before. He sat up, which caused Ed’s hand to fall on his inner thigh. Awkwardly, he put his hand down by his side. “I should probably change first.” Ed’s eyes fell to where Stede’s shirt was open.

“Yeah, you go do that, pal. I’ll be in here.”

“Why don’t you come with me?”

“To change?” Ed lifted a questioning eyebrow.

“No, well– I mean I do need help out of my shirt, broken arm and all.” He lifted the arm that was in the sling. “But don’t you want to change out of those messy clothes? I’m sure mine would fit you. We seem about the same size.”

Ed opened his mouth to speak but couldn’t find words. “Um- uh-.” Stede looked at him, waiting. “Yes. That’d be nice. Gettin’ out of these old things.”

Stede smiled and made a gesture with his head that said “follow me,” so Ed trailed behind him, completely bewildered by what was happening.

They went up a spiraling set of stairs and walked down a long corridor with a fancy carpet into a giant master bedroom. One entire length of wall was covered in books and way too many candles for the average person. The ceiling held two chandeliers because fuck you, two is better than one apparently. One was over some leather sitting chairs, a dark round table, and a red square carpet, and the other was above a giant bed. Said bed had silk sheets, a linen duvet, and more pillows than necessary. It was all extravagant and so much more fancier than any cowboy needed.

Across the room, there was a door, supposedly for a bathroom, and another smaller door near a tall mirror, supposedly for a closet. But Stede Bonnet was headed somewhere else entirely. Towards the bookshelf.

“If I show you something do you promise not to tell anyone?” Stede had his hand on a book but was turning back and looking at Ed eagerly.

Ed, just as eager to see whatever it was that he would trust to show him (and supposedly only him), nodded quickly. “Yeah, pal. I promise.”

Stede pushed into the shelf and it gave way, opening to reveal a giant closet.

“Holy shit,” Ed breathed.

“No one knows about this. When I moved in I thought I might add some secret rooms. There’s a few more you might like to see?”

Ed didn’t meet Stede’s eyes. Instead he looked around in wonder at the amount of fancy clothing in this giant closet. “That’d be amazing.”

Stede smiled shyly to himself and watched how Ed ran his fingers over each shirt, carefully examining them all. “Are you into fashion?”

“Um, maybe. I don’t know.” He lied. He loved fashion. “I’ve just never seen anyone be this extravagant. I’m jealous.”

“You’re jealous of me? Wow. That's a high honor coming from the Blackbeard.”

Ed turned around to face Stede and sighed, defeat in his eyes. He plopped down on an ottoman in front of Stede. “I’m tired of Blackbeard.”

“You are?” Stede asked carefully. He didn’t want to pry, but he was curious.

“It’s so fuckin’ boring. I don’t even have a challenge anymore. I’m gonna win no matter what, and people are scared of me. I just wanna be someone else.” Ed took of the white cowboy hat on his head and set it on his chest. His thumb ran over the jewels. “I love what you’re doin’, even if it’s fuckin’ weird..”

“Aw, well, thank you.”

Ed hopped to his feet, wincing slightly because of the knee. He swapped out the black cowboy hat on Stede’s head for his white one and stepped back, giving him a once over. He shrugged, and their eyes met with mutual admiration. “You are very cool, and I envy you, Cowboy. Now. Are we gonna change?”

Stede nodded. “Yes! You can pick out anything you want.”

“I wanna see what you choose first.”

“Oh! Well, I was actually wanting to model something off of you. I really like your style.” Ed blushed and watched as Stede walked over to one of the racks. He grabbed a black shirt with jewels making a beautiful pattern that looked like wings on the chest, and black bootcut jeans that had jewels running down the side like vines. Ed could never imagine himself wearing these, but they were definitely something he’d admire.

Stede sat on a red ottoman and began unbuttoning his shirt as Ed stared. He wasn’t in this room right now mentally, nothing made sense. How did Stede have all this and why did he have all this? It was pure luxury.

“Can you help me?” Ed came back to reality and noticed Stede no longer had the hat on or the shirt. The sling rested on his leg, but his forearm had a cast on it and Stede still held his arm as if it was in the sling. Realistically, he could probably put the shirt on himself, but he asked Ed for help.

“Um, yeah.” His voice caught in his throat. He knelt in front of Stede and held up the shirt, letting his fingers run over the jewels first.

“Do you like it?” Stede asked softly. Ed’s eyes snapped up and their gaze held on each other. Stede had his head cocked slightly like a dog curiously listening, and while the smile on his face was small, it reached his eyes in a way that gut-punched any bit of Blackbeard and left Edward bare.

“It’s gorgeous. The jewels. They look expensive.”

“They’re real crystals from the finest mines around the world. Every gem is cut very precisely and sewn on. Each one costs about five hundred dollars.”

“Five hundred per crystal? Stede, each shirt probably costs about as much as a damn horse!” His eyes widened, both shocked and jealous. There was no way in hell he could ever afford anything like that. Despite Blackbeard’s popularity, even upkeep on the horses was getting hard, and Izzy threatened to sell a few of the ones that were underused—typically some rescue horse that wasn’t in shape to be ridden.

“Well, yes, I suppose.” Stede shrugged like money meant nothing, and Ed’s eyes narrowed. He couldn’t believe he was so intrigued by some privileged rich boy. Silence passed. “We don’t have all day.”

Ed nodded. Right. He held up the right sleeve of the shirt and Stede pushed his arm in. When it came to the left sleeve, Ed had to stretch it slightly to get it around onto Stede’s arm, who refused to just straighten his arm. (“I can’t risk making it worse, Ed!”) Once both sleeves were on, Ed’s fingers worked the buttons. He kept his head low, but stretched his body up the higher he went on the shirt, until he got to the top button and paused. He looked up now, his face only inches away from Stede’s, whose eyes met his again and caused his stomach to churn. Ed’s hands gripped the collar, his thumbs slightly rested on Stede’s collarbone. “Do you- uh. Top button? Yes or no? Do you want it buttoned?”
Stede swallowed and shook his head. “No, that’s good, thank you,” he croaked out.

“Okay.” He removed his hands, setting them on Stede’s knees. “Need anything else, Cowboy?”

“I think I can figure the rest out. Why don’t you go pick something out?”

Ed stood up and tipped his hat, winking. “Can do.” He walked towards the rack of clothes. As Stede struggled to take his pants off and put on new ones, Ed ran his hands along each shirt, admiring the fabric. For the most part it wasn’t a different material than what he wore, but it was a higher quality. The shirts were soft beneath his fingertips.

One thing in the closet caught Ed’s eye, a beautiful embroidered red vest. The embroidery was shiny and looked like plants or flowers. He chose this, a plain white shirt—and Ed was shocked to know that Stede even owned something not insanely fancy—and dress pants. It was way too fancy for breakfast, but, when in Rome, Ed figured. He brought the clothes over to Stede, who was just finishing up putting his boots on.

“What do you think of this?”

Stede looked up and smiled, seemingly proud of Ed’s choice. “It’s lovely. I got that vest while in France.”

Ed set the clothes down and began unbuttoning his shirt. “You travel often?”

“Sometimes. I used to take a yearly trip with- uh, with my family. Been to lots of places outside the states, don’t really enjoy travelling here.”

“How come?” His shirt was fully off now, thrown on the ground. He picked up the white one.

“Eh, I just find America a little boring.”

“I’ll take you somewhere cool, Cowboy.” Ed looked up from the buttons on his—Stede’s—shirt to find him smiling shyly and blushing, a light shade of pink on his cheeks now. “Never been out of the states. Grew up in a small town, we didn’t have much but I had a small ass pony and boy, that thing took me everywhere. Even in highschool, ‘cause we only had one car, and I wasn’t allowed to drive it. Feel bad for the ole gal now, lookin’ back. I was probably way too big to be sittin’ on her, but I can’t change nothin’ about that now.” Ed looked up again, this time to see Stede fidgeting with his fingers. He couldn’t tell if he was listening or if he cared or not, so he sped along his story. “Um, point is, I couldn’t really afford to go places, so I explored in nature. When I was seventeen I had some cash saved up so I bought me a trekkin’ horse and I just explored every goddamn place I could for about ten years. ‘Til I went to a rodeo and fell in love with that.” He spoke faster now while he put on the vest and pants. “What I’m sayin’ is, I know some sweet spots ‘round here that wouldn’t cost you or me a single dime, so, if you’re up for it, we could go on a lil adventure sometime.”

Stede looked up with something in his eye that reassured Ed he was listening and cared the entire time. He smiled and nodded. “I’d like that.”

Ed nodded back. “How do I look?” He spread his arms.

“Great. You just need one more thing.” Stede stood up and pulled out a drawer. In it were even more hats in every color, he grabbed a red one with beautiful diamonds. “Here you go.” Stede smiled as he grabbed the black cowboy hat off of Ed, put it on his own, and set the red cowboy hat on Ed’s head. “Perfect.”

“Damn, Cowboy, you got a hat in every color?”

“Well, a gentleman must have coordinating outfits,” Stede replied in a faux smug voice. He crossed his legs and held his arms out in a curtsy. “Ready for breakfast?”
“With the Gentleman Cowboy accompanying me? Ready for anything.” Ed winked and bent his left arm for Stede to hold onto. To Ed’s surprise, he actually took it, grabbing the crook of his elbow.

“Why thank you. You’re a bit of a gentleman yourself, partner.”

Ed tipped his hat again and winked. “Just following your excellent lead.”

Notes:

haha please tell me what you think and give me suggestions bc i am making this fic up as i go and suggestions and thoughts r helpful thank you

Chapter 5: I Admire You, Cowboy.

Summary:

ed and stede eat breakfast together. roach and lucius gossip.

Notes:

another short chapter of nothingness but we'll get to plot eventually i promise. then once i do u all will be begging me to go back to short cute chapters ...

anyway enjoy!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Ed and Stede came down the stairs laughing. Lucius could barely hear what they were talking about, but he caught the words “whale” and “never again.” He assumed Stede was telling the story about the time he thought he would try out sailing, but quickly retreated back to shore when he saw a giant whale beside him. It wasn’t that funny of a story, but clearly someone disagreed, seeing as how they stumbled into the kitchen giggling. Edward had a hand on Stede’s left shoulder and was leaning his forehead on the other shoulder, laughing.

“You’re fuckin’ weird, pal. You just do whatever you want, huh?” Ed stood in front of Stede now, a hand on his right elbow. 

“Well, not really. But when I travel I try different things. Some I like, some I don’t.”

“I admire you, Cowboy. My life’s pretty boring. I don’t do nothin’ new.” Ed was beaming at Stede as if he was the best thing he’s ever seen. And Stede was smiling back just the same. Roach, on the other side of the kitchen, gave Lucius a confused glance. ucius shrugged his shoulders, just as confused as he was.

“Oh, come on. You’re the best barrel racer there is! What more do you need?”

Ed looked down and scoffed, shaking his head. “Nah, it’s boring. I wanna try new things, ya know? Tired of all this.”

Roach and Lucius’ eyes now met in a wide, shocked look.

Ed stepped closer, tapping a knuckle on Stede’s chest. “How about we make eachother a deal? You show me new things, and I’ll show you new things.”

Stede subconsciously stepped back, feeling warmth overtake his face and an unrecognizable feeling overtake his stomach. He thought it might just be embarrassment, since he was acutely aware of Roach and Lucius’ eyes seering into him. “How do you mean that?”

“Well, I’ll teach you how to barrel race and show you where all the cool places are around here, and you teach me whatever you want. Deal?” Ed held out his hand to make it official.

Stede chuckled softly and shook Ed’s hand. “Deal.” The handshake lasted longer than necessary as Ed’s eyes scanned Stede’s face, looking at him as intently as earlier that morning.

Roach cleared his throat in an attempt to get their attention. “Would you two lovebirds like to eat?”

Startled, their hands went to their sides and they turned to face Roach and Lucius across the room. “Yes! Sorry,” Stede said weakly and threw in a fake laugh to alleviate the awkwardness. 

“Hello! I’m Ed!” Ed had made his way around the island separating him and the other men and held his hand out to Roach, who hesitantly took it and looked at Lucius.

“Just go with it,” Lucius whispered.

“I’m Roach, sir.”

Ed smiled wide. “Lovely to meet you. But drop the sir.” He turned around to face the assortment of foods on the table: lots of fruits, toast with different kinds of marmalades beside them, pancakes, croissants, and a plate full of bacon. “I hope I’m not intruding on breakfast, Roach. Did you cook all this?”

“Yes I did. You can have anything you’d like, sir. I mean- I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, pal. This is wonderful. You’re very talented.” Ed clapped a hand on Roach’s shoulder and turned to Stede. “You got ya some good friends here, Cowboy,” he said almost sadly, like he couldn’t say the same for himself.

Stede nodded and turned to grab a plate. He filled it up with toast and took a jar of marmalade to sit on a stool at the counter.

“That was weird,” Roach whispered to Lucius. “When did Stede become friends with Blackbeard?”

“I don’t know. He visited him in the hospital.”

“In the hospital ? Did they meet before then?”

“No, I don’t think so. Pretty sure Blackbeard helped him when he was thrown but they never properly met.”

They both turned their attention to the pair sitting at the counter. Ed had both his hands full of bacon.

“Here, try this.” Stede held up a piece of toast with marmalade on it. Ed motioned to his full hands and leaned forward, opening his mouth. He bit down on it and moved an arm to steady Stede’s shaky hand.

“Damn, that’s fuckin’ good. Bacon?” Ed held up one of his now greasy hands close to Stede’s face. He bent his head down to grab one of the pieces of bacon that was hanging from between Ed’s fingers with his mouth.

“Mm, thank you, Ed.”

Ed nodded quickly. “‘Course, Cowboy.”

Roach and Lucius turned to one another. “And now they’re feeding each other,” Lucius said.

“Do you think Ed knows his name? He just keeps calling him ‘cowboy.’”

“I don’t know…”

“Should we ask?”

“Are you seriously asking if we should ask Blackbeard if he knows Stede’s name because he keeps calling him something else? Blackbeard does whatever the fuck he wants, Roach.”

Laughter erupted loudly at the counter. Ed was doubled over laughing at something Stede said. They couldn’t believe it. Stede Bonnet was making Blackbeard laugh like a schoolgirl with her first real crush.

“Ed, Ed. Look at me,” Stede said loud enough for Ed to hear above his own laughter. He lifted his head, cocked to the side with a goofy grin on his face.

“I’m lookin’, pal.” And I like the view, Ed thought.

“You’ve got food in your beard.” Stede pointed to a spot where a little bit of bread crust lay. Ed’s greasy fingers ran through his beard, searching for the food but failing to find it. Stede chuckled softly. “Want me to get it?” Ed nodded and Stede plucked the bread from the curls and sat it on the plate beside him. “There you go.”

“My savior.” Ed tipped his hat and smiled.

“Oh my god, they’re insufferable,” Lucius whispered.

 

Suddenly, Black Pete ran into the kitchen, scaring everyone in the room with his urgency. “Guys, have you heard the news about Blackbeard?!”

Ed turned around on the swivel stool to face him. “What news?”

Pete’s eyes went wide, pointing at him. “Holy fucking shit, what the fuck is Blackbeard doing here? Do you guys see him or am I imagining him again?”

“I’m here, pal… wait, again ?” He cocked his head and furrowed his brows. 

“Don’t worry about it,” Stede whispered to him.

“Okay,” Ed whispered in response. He smiled and held out his hand. “What’s your name?”

“Oh, um, I’m Pete.” Pete grabbed Ed’s hand and placed his other hand on top of the already formed handshake. “It’s really good to meet you, Blackbeard, sir.”

Ed bit the inside of his cheek, stifling the anger he felt from the name Blackbeard. He didn’t say anything, but turned back around to face Stede as soon as the handshake was over.

“What was your news, Pete?” Roach asked, catching Ed’s attention, who had forgotten all about his own curiosity.

“Right. Blackbeard’s horse, The Kraken – who I love by the way Mr. Blackbeard, sir – was ridden by Izzy Hands and got him qualified for the championship,” Pete said in his best announcer voice. “Why weren’t you there, Blackbeard?” 

“Didn’t want to be,” Ed mumbled so quietly it was almost to himself.

Talk erupted from there, Roach and Lucius spoke up in shock, Pete asked him a question, and Stede, with a hand on his shoulder and lips close to his ear, whispered only for Ed to hear, “Congrats.” And then in an even softer tone that made Ed feel like he was a stick of butter being cut by a hot knife, “You alright?” His hand went comfortingly to Ed’s knee.

Ed looked up and smiled at Stede. He was happy with himself when Stede smiled back and kept his hand where it was. “I’m all good, Cowboy.” It was an obvious lie, but Stede wouldn’t push.

“Do you have to leave or…?”

“Are you asking me if I’d like to spend more time with you?” They now faced each other completely. Ed had his right leg stretched out in between Stede’s legs to rest on the spindle of his stool.

“Um, well, I-”

“-Yes.”

“Yes?”

“Yes, I want to spend more time with you. If, obviously, you want that too. I’ll get out of your hair if you’re tired of me.” People typically got tired of Blackbeard sooner rather than later. He was told, mainly by Izzy, that he could be a real pain to be around.

“No, not at all. I’m enjoying this.” 

“Good. So am I.” Ed moved his leg so it bumped Stede’s softly. Stedereturned the touch, smiling.

“So, what’s going on between those two?” Pete asked Lucius and Roach loudly. Ed and Stede’s heads looked up quickly.

“Us?” The pair said in unison, causing the three men to look at them, amused.e

“Well considering you two are the only ones that have been flirting all morning, I’d say that’s who Pete was talking about,” Lucius replied.

“Oh, um. We’re just friends, right Ed?” Stede looked at Ed, who looked back with a sadness in his eyes that Stede didn’t notice.

“Yeah, pal.” There was awkward silence in the room. Lucius had noticed Ed’s look, but said nothing. Stede couldn’t think of a reply. “Uh, anyway, thank you for breakfast, Roach. It was delicious.”

“Yes, what he said,” Stede added.

“You’re welcome. Don’t you guys have things to do?” Roach asked.

“Yes! I would enjoy getting some more riding in with my wonderful teacher.”

My. Ed liked the way he said that. He smiled and stood up, walking out of the kitchen with Stede on his left. Stede’s elbow nudged him, and the three men watched as Ed pretended to be bothered, and leaned over to say something as he put a hand on the small of Stede’s back, pushing him in front of him as Stede laughed about whatever it was Ed said.

“Wow,” Lucius said, turning to the others.

“Doesn’t Stede have a wife?” Roach asked.

“Yes.” Lucius sighed.

“Cheating is okay if you’re gay,” Pete joked.

“Don’t think he knows he’s gay. Did you guys see Blackbeard’s look when Stede said they were friends?” Roach said. “He looked like a puppy who just got yelled at for the first time.”

“That was weird. Do you guys trust him?” Lucius asked.

“Blackbeard? Of course,” Pete said. “He’s amazing.”

“Yeah, but he’s kind of known for his amount of one night stands. I mean he has girls throwing themselves at him all the time. Is he even gay?” Lucius questioned.

“He always looks uncomfortable around them. Last time we went to Jackie’s he went off with some hot cowboy that came up to him,” Pete mentioned.

“Okay. But he doesn’t really seem like the commitment type. I just hope he’s not using Stede,” Lucius commented sadly.

“Well, if he is, it’s a good thing we know a guy that’s really good at cutting things up.” Roach picked up one of his knives and smiled.

 

“I’m sorry about them,” Stede said. Him and Ed were walking to the barn.

“Why are you sorry?”

“They seemed like they bothered you. They’re just nosy and annoying. I don’t want you to be bothered.”

“I’m not bothered, Cowboy. Wasn’t really payin’ attention to them. Don’t feel bad.” Ed slowed his steps and gave Stede a look that said I was payin’ attention to you . Stede’s stomach flipped.

“Aye, aye, captain.”

They continued walking, and Ed nudged Stede lightly. “I’m havin’ a lot of fun.”

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Go ‘head.”

“Why are you so interested in me?” The question felt ridiculous to Ed. Who wouldn’t be interested? But he knew, looking at Stede, that the question was serious.

“You’re different. In a good way. You wear these fuckin’ fancy clothes and don’t know a damn thing about barrel racing but you do it ‘cause you want to. Nobody else is like that. Hell, I’m not even like that.”

“But you explored when you wanted to.”

Ed sighed. “Yeah but that’s ‘cause I had nothin’. Now I have somethin’ but I can’t leave it even if I wanted to – which I do. ‘Cause then I’d have nothin’ again and that’s fuckin’ terrifying.”

Stede put a hand on Ed’s shoulder. “I’m sorry. I didn’t think through my comment before I said it. I think I just want to be like you. You’re so sure of yourself and you know your place in this world. You don’t seem like you’re fumbling your way through life. I do what I want because I don’t have a place anywhere so I have to do something to figure that out.”

Ed stopped walking. He turned to face Stede and put a hand on his right shoulder. Mirroring his touch, Stede moved his arm up to hold Ed’s left shoulder. “You have a place, Cowboy.”

“No, I don’t.”

“Yeah, you do. You, at the very least, got a place in my mind as the best damn cowboy I’ve ever met.”

“That can’t be true. You’re just being nice.”

Ed chuckled, bowing his head. “I’m not nice, Stede. And I wouldn’t say things just to be nice. I’d only say it if I really believed it.”

“Well, thank you.” Stede smiled nicely and walked into the barn. Ed followed.

“Have you ever rode bareback?” Ed pat Sarah’s nose through the bars. He liked her.

“No. My mother thought it was unsafe and I’ve never had the guts to do it. It seems like it would be hard to stay on.”

“You got guts, pal. It’s not hard.” Ed opened Sarah’s stall door and walked in. “Will you try?” 

Stede looked up at him. “Yeah.” Ed smiled sweetly. 

 

Just like the day before, they groomed together, laughing and talking as they did. Ed bridled Sarah, as it’s hard to bridle a horse with only one functioning arm. 

They went into the arena and stopped by the stool. “When you get on, just relax. It’ll feel weird but you’ll do better if you just sink into her back. Don’t hold on too tight with your legs because that’ll just make her go faster,” Ed advised.

“Got it.” Stede mounted and tried his best to relax. He flared his legs out and held onto the reins with his right hand—the good one. “Is this good?”

“It’s kind of hard to see.” Ed stepped beside him and held his hands up near Stede’s hips. “Do you mind?” Stede shook his head and watched Ed as his hands went on either side of his hips, their eyes not meeting. “Your hips are a little stiff. Just relax, Cowboy.”

For some reason, with Ed’s hands on him, Stede found it harder to relax than normal. He was rigid under Ed’s firm touch, a brick wall. “I feel a little unstable.” That was only the half truth. Yes, he felt unstable, but there was something more, though Stede didn’t know what that something was.

“Yeah, you’re going to. Just pretend like you’re riding normally. Why don’t you go walk? Let your hips move with her.”

Stede clucked and Sarah moved forward, leaving Ed’s hands and his warm touch behind.

After a few calm steps, he relaxed. His hips sunk deeper into Sarah’s back, and in turn, she too became more relaxed. Stede may have ridden horses, but he didn’t really understand them and how their minds worked. He had good horses who listened to him, but he never truly felt connected to any of them until now. Stede recognized, as he let himself be at ease, that Sarah was as well, and anytime he tensed up, so did she. Horses reciprocated their rider’s energy, he found.

It took a good ten minutes of walking around before Stede felt completely sure of himself. Ed commented that ten minutes was quicker than most to get adjusted to riding bareback for the first time and walked over beside Stede.

As Stede was thanking him for the comment, Ed’s hands were on his hips again. He fought the urge to tense up once more, knowing that Ed was feeling to see how tight those muscles were. “You really loosened up, Cowboy. Knew you’d get the hang of it quick ‘n easy.” Ed looked up at Stede from under his hat, which shaded his face aside from his bright eyes. “Wanna go on a little adventure?”

Stede’s face lit up, which caused Ed’s stomach to do a little flip. In these short couple days of knowing Stede Bonnet, the Gentleman Cowboy, Ed’s worldview has completely changed and he’s decided his favorite thing might just be the cowboy’s smile. Extra points if Ed was the cause of the smile, which seemed to be the case a lot this morning and last night. 

“That sounds great, Ed,” Stede answered in a small half-whisper.

“Quick question, though. Do you have any other horses ‘round here?”

“Um, well, Pete and Lucius both have some horses, but they live outside. Are you wanting to ride?”

“I wanted us to go on a lil trail ride together, but I don’t wanna ride someone else’s horse without askin’ them. I’ll just walk beside ya.” Ed sounded disappointed, but he didn’t really mind walking next to Stede. If anything, it’d be nice. He could keep a hand on his leg, though he feared too much walking would aggravate his bad knee. 

“Oh, no! They won’t mind. If anything, I’m certain Pete would be thrilled to know the Blackbeard rode his horse. I can show you the way.” Stede noticed Ed’s quick change of face when he said Blackbeard, and quickly apologized.

“Nah, ‘s all good, pal.” He didn’t really mind that much because he knew Stede didn’t have the same meaning behind the name Blackbeard as everyone else did, but his knee jerk reaction was to wince at the thought of everything associated with the moniker. “Go right ahead. I’ll follow.”

 

Stede took Ed through knee-high grass to a pasture where three horses grazed. He pointed to a short black one. “That there is Blackbeard.”

“He named a horse after me?” Ed thought that was weird. 

“He’s a big fan,” Stede said, attempting to make it sound as wholesome as possible. “Be careful mounting. He’s not as easy-going as Sarah is.”

Ed left Stede’s side and approached the horse slowly, putting a hand on his withers.

“Don’t you want a bridle, Ed?”

“Nah. More fun doin’ it without. It’s like a trust exercise. Ya really get to see how well you know the horse.” Ed wasn’t looking at Stede, and instead was looking at the horse’s height, the ground, and his mane. He was gauging how far back he’d have to go and how much mane he’d have to grab to jump without a stool or someone helping.

“But you don’t know this horse.” Ordinarily, a line like this would’ve hurt Ed. Coming from anyone else’s mouth it would’ve sounded condescending, but coming from Stede’s mouth it sounded caring and genuinely worried. Not because he didn’t believe in Ed’s ability to ride, but because he just didn’t want to see Ed hurt. 

“I got it, Cowboy. D’ya trust me?” Ed looked over his shoulder. He had a handful of mane in his left hand and was standing slightly in front of Blackbeard the Horse’s shoulder.

Their eyes met, and Stede nodded. “I trust you.”

Ed smiled wide. Not many people he wanted to trust him actually did, only fanboys who didn’t really know him. To be fair, Stede only knew him for less than a week, and realistically probably didn’t know him at all, but something about the way he looked at Ed, smiled, nodded, and told him he trusted him ever so softly made Ed feel the most seen and known he’s ever felt in his life. Turning his head to look at his feet, he ran forward and leaped, tossing his right leg over the side of Blackbeard the Horse and pulling himself up.

Before anyone could do anything, Blackbeard the Horse took off with Blackbeard the Man on his back.

Notes:

hello next chapter should be a fun one pls bare with me i know these updates are slow

Chapter 6: My Favorite Cowboy

Summary:

takes place directly after chapter 5.

stede chases after ed. ed falls in mud, makes a promise to stede, and washes off in a lake.

Notes:

this couldve came out like 3 days ago but i got lazy so it didnt lol my apologies. anyway here it is now so enjoy!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Stede watched as Ed gracefully mounted Pete’s horse and watched as Pete’s horse—distastefully named Blackbeard—ran off with him. It didn’t look purposeful. Ed wanted to explore, but he knew Stede was nervous about riding bareback, he wouldn’t go bolting across a field without at the very least asking him first. Though Stede had apparently forgotten about all his fears as soon as he saw Blackbeard the Horse gallop away with his new friend. Stede gave Sarah a kick, yelled, and galloped right after him.

Stede had never galloped before, let alone bareback. In any other circumstance he would’ve been scared shitless, thinking only of ways he could fall off, but right now all he cared about was chasing after Ed, and making sure nothing happened to him.

 

“Fuckin’ hell, you really are a Blackbeard. All passion, don’t think nothin’ through, huh?” Ed yelled at the horse beneath him. Ed had been told before that he was very aggressive, very big with his movements, and not calm at all. Seems the horse weirdly took after him. Without a second thought he just took off.

Ed had to admit, it was fun. He loved a good gallop, even bareback. Nothing about riding really scared him—except the idea of his knee problems somehow worsening. It already hurt like a bitch most days. Despite the thrill of going as fast as possible, he hated to leave Stede behind. He hoped Stede didn’t think he was purposefully abandoning him.

He looked back to see where Stede was, and shockingly saw him not too far away, galloping behind at a similar pace. “Hell yeah, Cowboy! You’re fuckin’ amazing!” Ed looked ahead of him to see a giant puddle of mud the size of a small lake in front of him. While he saw it, he wasn’t quick enough to stop Blackbeard the Horse before the horse stopped by himself, abruptly sending Ed over his head and into the mud. Stede came up beside Blackbeard the Horse.

“Oh my god, are you okay Ed?” Stede’s voice was shaky. His adrenaline rush was coming down and he was feeling every emotion from the past two minutes all at once. The fear of falling off, the fear of being ran away with, the fear of Ed being hurt… “Ed?” He asked again when Ed didn’t immediately emerge after his question. 

Finally, Ed stood up, looking less like a man and more like a mud monster with the way it was coated around his entire body. He stepped out of the mud lake and shook off like a dog out of water. “Goddamn, he throws like a bitch.” Ed looked down, swiping off most of the mud to reveal the beautiful red vest beneath the brown. “Oh, shit, Cowboy, I’m so sorry. I got your fancy ass clothes all dirty.”

“Ed, Ed. Come here.” Ed came. Stede wiped a hand over his face, getting the mud off so he could see him clearer. “I don’t care about the clothes. They’ll wash. I care about you. Are you alright?”

Subconsciously, Ed had leaned into the feeling of Stede’s hand on his face. “Aw, you care,” he said in a slightly teasing tone, but deep down he was shocked and happy that Stede would care about him.

“Of course I do. You’re my friend. Answer my question.”

Ed’s eyes softened, returning to their natural state. Or at least natural to how Stede saw them whenever their gazes found each other. Eyes as dark as the mud in his beard yet bright as the North Star. Stede wasn’t aware that eyes could do more than look, but Ed’s eyes found a way to rip him apart and piece him back together all the same. The feeling in his abdomen went away when Ed lowered his head, and returned when Ed immediately laughed. “You’re lucky ya got a broken arm and that I’m nice, or I’d be throwin’ you in the mud right now.”

“I thought you weren’t nice,” Stede stated matter-of-factly.

Ed looked back up, and there was now a playfulness in his eyes that worked its way down into a crooked half-smile. “You’re right. I’m not.” Ed lifted a muddy hand and spread it all over Stede’s face, coating him in sludge.

“You are so dead,” Stede teased. He dropped his reins and moved to get off.

Ed stepped back and pointed at Stede. “If you get off that damn horse I’m givin’ you a mud hug, I swear on it. I’m warnin’ you, Cowboy.”

“I hear you, Cowboy ,” Stede said mockingly. “But I’ll take the risk.” He dismounted, and before he could make any movements, Ed had his arms around him from behind and his lips against his ear. He made a sound of discomfort as the mud enveloped him.

“Hey, I don’t wanna hear no complainin’. I swore to you if you got off that damn horse I was givin’ you a mud hug, and I don’t break my word. You did this to yourself, Cowboy,” Ed whispered. He removed his arms, stepping back. Stede turned around to face him. “You can keep that in mind, though, if you ever need somethin’ from me. Make me swear and it’ll happen.”

“Is this a trick I can use anytime or…?”

“I’m normally real picky about who I make promises to, and what I promise, but I’ll give you a special pass, ‘cause I like you. Go ‘head, ask me for anything.”

“Um, well, I know we already talked about you showing me around but can you swear on it, just so I know it’s real?”

Ed took a step closer and looked into Stede’s eyes as if he were searching for something. Searching for the smallest hint that Stede might be joking, might be playing him. He found nothing of the sort, and instead just saw eagerness and joy in them. He really wants this. He actually, really fuckin’ wants this. Shit. “Cowboy,” Ed said in a low, gravelly tone. He grabbed Stede’s hand like he was making some sort of proposal. “I swear on everything good in this world, I will take you on a grand adventure. Just like the ones in the movies. If you’ll have me, of course.”

He looked up again, and not a single thing changed in Stede Bonnet’s beautiful, crazy eyes. They had a childlike wonder to them. They weren’t hardened by the sights around him. Ed saw things he wished he could forget, things Stede wouldn’t even think of. “I’ll have you.”

Ed’s breath caught in his throat. He wanted to speak but his brain had other plans. He took another step forward, closing the gap between their chests, mud now on Stede’s front, too. His eyes grew wide and pleading. Without a second thought, he leaned his head forward to close yet another gap between them, hoping Stede would have him in more ways than one.

Their lips never made contact like Ed wants them too, though, because Stede laughed shyly and let go of Ed’s hand. “We should clean up. We’re filthy.”

“Okay,” Ed said quietly, almost cracking. The rush of every feeling possible kept him frozen in place as Stede nodded, laughed again, and stepped aside to grab Sarah. 

Ed was thrilled with the promise he made to Stede, and he was more than willing to follow through with the promise no questions asked. He’d take Stede fucking Bonnet, Gentleman Cowboy, anywhere he wanted to go. Hell, if Stede fucking Bonnet wanted to go to China he’d sell every horse on the farm, save for Jeff, just to pay for plane tickets to get him on the other side of the globe. Whatever he wanted, Edward Teach decided right here, right now, that he was fully committed to making sure it happened.

Ed was angry at himself, though, for pushing, for trying to kiss him. He didn’t even know if Stede was into guys. He was angry and he was hurt. Rejection stung, and believe it or not, he was all too used to it. Way too many times in his life had he come onto a friend, who was into men, and gotten shoved and yelled at. For some reason, rejection from Stede hurt worse than any of that. With them, all he wanted was sex. With Stede, for the first time in his life, he wanted something more. Whatever that meant.

“Coming, Ed?” Stede called. Ed’s five-stages-of-grief moment passed as quick as it came when he heard Stede’s wonderful, way-too-cheery-for-the-world-we-live-in voice.

“Yeah.” Blackbeard the Horse had abandoned them, he now realized.

“You alright?” God, he’s too fuckin’ sweet. Stede Bonnet this world does not deserve you, especially my crowd, Ed thought.

“Was just thinkin’ about things.”

“Yeah, like what?” There was that eager and curiosity again.

“Just thinkin’ about where I wanna take you first. You deserve a real good place.”

“I’m sure any place you take me will be lovely,” Stede said. Sincerely.

Ed looked at him, his brain stopping for a second again. “Uh, thank you.”

Stede smiled. “You’re welcome.”

 

They walked a long ways back towards the house, covered in mud, Stede leading Sarah. They stopped by a lake to let Sarah get a drink.

“Wanna wash off in here?” Ed suggested playfully. He was already working on taking his boots off.

“What? The water is dirty! I don’t think it’d get us very clean,” Stede replied.

“Oh, come on, Cowboy! What happened to wanting an adventure? You can’t be scared of a lil murky waters, now.” Ed was now barefoot and approaching Stede with his arms out. Stede tried to back away from him, but Ed was faster and picked him up swiftly, holding him bridal style.

“Put me down!” Stede wriggled around, but put up no actual fight.

“What’s the problem? Is my favorite cowboy scared of some water?” Ed walked slowly towards the lake.

Stede’s brain pushed away the sudden giddiness of being called Ed’s favorite to focus on the matter at hand, not being thrown in the water. “You have a horrible way of showing your favoritism!” 

“Hey, these old bones don’t just hold anybody in my arms! You should be grateful!”

“I didn’t ask for this!”

Ed was in the water now, it was up to his thighs. He held Stede above it. “Oh, I can set you down then.” Ed pretended to drop Stede, but still didn’t let him hit the water. 

No! ” Stede held onto Ed with his good arm and buried his face in the crook of his neck. Ed laughed, and he could feel the vibrations on his forehead.

“Do you actually have something against water or are you just fuckin’ with me?”

“I just don’t want to be covered in dirty lake water.”

Ed tilted his head, thinking. “Hm, I think you’ll survive.” He dropped Stede light, making

sure he wasn’t hurt on the way down.

Stede stood up and sighed loudly, but playfully. He shoved Ed, making him fall 

down in the water, who threw a piece of algae up at him. “Hey!” Stede yelled, swatting it away.

Ed kicked at his leg, lightly, making him fall. He reached out to make sure his broken arm wasn’t jostled too much. Normally, his version of messing around would involve someone being hurt, but this was different. He didn’t want Stede to be injured. 

They both sat, water up to their chests. “You’re awful.”

Under the green tinted water, Ed pulled Stede’s leg, dragging him closer. “Am I?”

Stede sighed. “Not actually.” He began laughing, a nice sound that Ed enjoyed.

“What? Do I have something on my face?”

Stede moved closer. “Well for starters…” He plucked something green from the top of Ed’s head and threw it beside them. “And if you’re gonna force me to be in this disgusting water, you could at least get this shit off your face.” Stede stuck his hand beneath the water to wet his sleeve, even though it was already wet, and used it to wipe the mud off Ed’s face. “There you go.”

“Do I look handsome, Cowboy?” Ed moved his head side to side slowly like the girls in the commercials do when they’re trying to look sexy.

“Yes,” Stede replied with way more sincerity than Ed expected. “Anyways, are you done holding me captive here?”

“You could’ve left whenever you wanted, don’t make me the bad guy, now!” Ed joked. “But yes, you’re free to leave. I’m actually getting tired of this dirty water.”

 

They walked back into the house sopping wet. They had taken Sarah back to her stall, but the walk there and then to the house wasn’t enough to dry them off. 

“You know, I still feel bad about getting mud on your clothes,” Ed said as Stede shut his bedroom door. They were lucky enough to avoid Gossip Central downstairs.

“Ed, I don’t mind, really. It’ll wash.” Stede walked into the bathroom. “Come here, set the clothes in the basket. I’ll get you clean clothes. You can shower if you want.”

“Okay,” Ed said softer than intended. Stede started to walk out of the room. “Hey, Stede?” He turned around, smiling at the use of his actual name—not that he didn’t like Cowboy, but he doubted if Ed actually knew his name, until now. “Thank you.”

“It’s just clothes and a shower, you don’t need to thank me. But you’re welcome.” Stede left, shutting the bathroom door. Ed laughed to himself. Any other man would’ve made him walk home in the muddy clothes. A shower and clean clothes was very nice. Jesus, he has no idea.

Five minutes later, Stede knocked on the door as if it wasn’t his own bathroom. He set a pair of clothes on a shelf beside the shower and left Ed alone again.

Ed took his time. For starters, his body was sore from being thrown and from the awkward sleeping position the night before. He needed his muscles to soak. And second of all, he was busying himself checking out all of Stede’s fancy bath products. There were bath salts and body scrubs and different shampoos for different reasons and so many unnecessary things that nobody needed for their every day shower. 

It was nice to use different things on his hair that made it extra soft and worked with his curls. Izzy did the shopping for everyone in his house. Ed didn’t want to be swarmed and recognized outside of the house or the show barns, but if Ed was being honest, the real reason for never going out was because he didn’t have the energy to. Life zapped him. So Izzy did the shopping and he bought 3-in-1. It worked, and Ed had never complained before, but when he got out of the shower and dried his hair, he saw a difference. It felt good to treat himself to fancy products. He would be asking Izzy to put a little effort into his shopping from now on.

Ed left the bathroom to see Stede looking like a miserable wet cat with a towel wrapped around him and mud still on his face. “Thank you again, Cowboy. I need to go home before someone sends a search party for me.”

“When can we practice again?”

“If you want some show ring practice there’s no shows going on tomorrow. Bring Sarah to the show barn if you want, I’ll be there. How’s that sound?”

“That works for me. Thank you for doing this.”

“It’s my pleasure, Cowboy.” He tipped the white hat on his head. “Sure you don’t want this back?”

“I have others. Keep it. Think of it as my thank you gift.”

Ed chuckled. “You’re too nice. I’ll give you your clothes back tomorrow.”

 

“Where the hell have you been?” Izzy said as Ed walked into the house. He was sitting at the dining room table like an overprotective parent waiting for their child to come home past curfew. Except it was 3 o’clock in the afternoon and the last time Ed checked, he didn’t have to answer to Izzy.

“Havin’ some fun, Iz! You should try it some time!” Ed walked right past him and plopped down on the couch.

“Very funny. What are you wearing?” Izzy followed him and stood beside the couch.

“Okay, dad , I’ll tell you everything. First of all, I already told you where I was going yesterday. Went to Stede Bonnet’s place.” 

“Did you fuck him?” Izzy asked. Ed stood up, standing mere inches away from him.

“I don’t kiss and tell,” Ed growled.

“You shouldn’t have fooled around with that pansy.”

Ed grabbed the front of Izzy’s shirt, yanking him hard. “I didn’t fuck him. He didn’t fuck me. Nothing sexual happened. We had a couple drinks and slept, separately , in his living room. We woke up and ate breakfast. The reason I am wearing different clothes is because his friend’s horse threw me into a puddle of mud and Stede gave me different clothes. What I do is none of your fucking business, Izzy. You work for me, ‘member?”

Izzy glared at him. “Yes, boss.”

Ed let go of him with a little shove. “Good. Congrats on the win last night, by the way. I appreciate you. Oh and also, Stede is coming to practice with us tomorrow. Don’t be an asshole, okay?”

“Yes, boss.”

Ed went out the backdoor. He needed some quality time with his own horse.

Notes:

thx for reading pls pls pls comment n leave a kudos and definitely let me know what you thought. feedback makes me enjoy writing this more and i feel more motivated when ppl say things :)