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Because She Makes Me Smile

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Because She Makes Me Smile

 

"Octavia," Clarke took a deep breath in; focusing her energy on forming any kind of excuse that could get her out of this. "I'm really sorry but I just can't... ever since I broke my ankle last summer it plays up whenever I do sport... I would really love to help you out but it's just not worth the pain I'll be in after."

Octavia narrowed her eyes at the girl, she had known Clarke since high school and she could easily tell when her friend was talking crap. "Bullshit Griffin!" Clarke moved her gaze to the ground finding it hard to keep focus on her friends angry glare. "You go jogging like EVERY morning that damn food vans here just so you can stuff your face while watching netflix all evening. How stupid do you think I am? You're coming. End of."

The brunette turned to leave the room but was dragged back by her friends firm grasp on her sleeve. "Octaviaaaaaa!" Clarke pleaded; she was not normally one to beg but the prospect of filling in for Octavia's rugby teammate for a 'fun' practice game against one another made her feel physically ill. The idea of sport in general made her want to puke. "That's totally different and you know it. If there was food rewards in rugby I would consider it... but there's not. And I've seen how aggressive your team mates get. For God's sake you're down a quarter of your team because you numb nuts got into a stupid bar fight over that college guys attempt to pick you up."

Octavia raised a palm to Clarke's face. "He had it coming and you totally agree. Anyone that thinks they can buy me a drink then tell a girl that," Octavia put on her best broody college guy impression. "I hope you like dragons, because I'll be dragon my balls across your face tonight."

Clarke snorted, nodding; the guy had totally deserved it. "Fine, he may have had it coming to him... BUT, I'm still not filling in. You know better than anyone that my hand eye coordination is limited to my lifting and pointing of the TV remote."

Octavia widened her eyes; resorting to her classic puppy dog face she knew made her friend weak. "Clarke, pleeaaaaaasee."

Clarke shook her head and closed her eyes tightly. "If I can't see that stupid face it's not going to work."

Octavia put on her best baby voice. "Clarkeyyy why don't you love me anymore..."

Clarke threw herself into their couch and huffed. "Fine. One game though... and Raven better be volunteering for a place as well... I'm not gonna be the only one looking like a dummy out there."

The brunette grinned and slumped down next to her friend; throwing her arm around her neck. "I knew I could count on you besty."

Clarke chuckled. "I still cant believe that moron actually thought that was an appropriate thing to say to someone."

"I know right, and it's totally ruined the new season of Game of Thrones for me. Like any of the hot Daenerys scenes I'm just gonna watch thinking of that guys balls as her poor pets." Octavia crumpled her face in disgust at the thought, then burst out into laughter when the image of a winged pair of testicles flying over the towns, terrorizing them with their fire breathing ability popped into her mind.

"Were leaving mid afternoon to head to the game, and there's spare kits ready for you and Raven." She hugged the moody looking girl before running out of the door.

"Ugh." Clarke raised the remote to the TV, putting on an episode of Orphan Black before moving to try on the kit. She looked in the mirror and curled her nose up at her reflection, disapproving of the blue and yellow team colors against her pale skin. She immediately took them off; changing into some black skinny jeans and a gray tank top.


Clarke spent the rest of the morning perched by her window; drawing strangers that sat on the bench some distance away as part of her people observations project for class. Clarke's mother hadn't been one to approve of her major- Abigail had always wished Clarke would be a doctor or at the very least something involving medicine- so Clarke worked hard at her art course; she would prove her mother wrong and show her she could be one of the few to make it in the world of art even if it killed her.

The blonde slammed her sketchbook shut and went to pack it- along with some charcoal- into her bag. She had grown tired of the same old surroundings and wanted a change, so she threw her backpack over her shoulder and quickly made her way down to the nearest coffee shop.

Clarke ordered her usual latte then hooked her art supplies out of her bag before throwing it underneath a table in the corner of the room. She relaxed into the metal chair; one hand wrapped possessively around her coffee as she let her eyes scour the cafe for a subject to sketch. Clarke felt her breath hitch as she saw a girl talking to her friends. The girl was beautifully tanned with a tattoo peering through the back of her black tank top; it was tribal like and a work of utter beauty. Though Clarke could not see her face, she would be her subject, she would simply draw her from behind.

Clarke sipped on her caffeinated beverage and let the charcoal work it's way across the page as she eagerly drew the girls back, slowly moving on to her tattoos, then onto her sexy brown curls that lay across her skin.

"You know that's kind of creepy Clarke."

Clarke swung round in fear then punched Octavia in the shoulder. "You scared the shit out of me asshole!"

Raven and Octavia dropped into the seats either side of Clarke; placing their drinks on the table. "So," Octavia waggled her eyebrows. "whose the hot girl you're drawing?"

Clarke blushed and quickly closed her book. "It's uh, n, nothing. Just a stupid project Kane set us."

Octavia grinned; noting her friends embarrassment. "Someones got a crushhh." She pushed Clarke and continued moving her eyebrows; this time throwing in a wink for good measure.

"Oh my God shut up! She's gonna hear you! And no I do not!" Clarke replied in a forceful whisper, moving to slap her friend around the back of the head.

"Chill Griffin, it's cool, don't get so pent up... Not like you're into girls anyway." Raven patted the blond gently on the back.

Clarke froze in her seat. It was only for a split second but it was long enough to make Octavia's eyes widen in realization- Clarke had a thing for girls.

Clarke quickly brought her cup to her mouth focusing on it instead of meeting Octavia's gaze. She couldn't know Clarke was bisexual. Clarke was only just figuring it out herself... how the hell did Octavia catch on so quickly. Octavia kicked the blonde under the table, then Clarke, frustrated, moved to kick her back; accidentally catching Raven's shin in the crossfire. "Whats your damage Clarke!" Raven stood from the table, her exclamation much louder than she had intended. She looked around; seeing the entire cafe's eyes on her and quickly retreated back into the comfort of her seat.

Clarke met Octavia's questioning gaze and simply shook her head at her; she was sure Octavia would ask her about it later though.

The girls finished their coffee and Clarke opened her sketchbook to remove the charcoal she'd left between the pages. "You know I charge for that kind of service?"

Clarke looked up, her breath caught in her throat as the beautiful girl she was drawing stood before her; staring down at her work. "I, I, uh-" Her words would not come out, her brain shutting down all senses but sight as she simply stared into the girls massive green eyes, her mouth ajar as her eyes traced along the girls strong jawline.

Octavia stared at Clarke biting her tongue as she winced at the horrific scene that was taking place before her. "Lexa?" She intervened, not wanting to watch Clarke goof out any longer.

Lexa turned to Octavia; a smile growing across her face in recognition of the brunette. "Octavia! We figured you guys would be on the field running drills before you get your asses handed to you in a bit?" Three girls stood behind Lexa, laughing at the comment.

"Hey!" Octavia gasped sarcastically- they were down half their team- this was a fair prediction. "You'll be the ones wanting to practice, my friends Raven and Clarke over there," She gestured to the blonde who was now staring down at her coffee; cheeks pink as she realized what a mumbling idiot she must had looked earlier. "are joining us and we've got the best subs, so you'll wanna watch your back."

Lexa unconsciously chewed her bottom lip as she looked the blonde up and down. "I guess it shall be an interesting game then." She added before walking out of the cafe; her eyes lingering on Clarke as she did.

Octavia waited until they were out of earshot. "She was totally checking you out Clarke! Even after you went full on blabbering weirdo!"

Clarke's cheeks turned from pink to a deep shade of red as she put her stuff in her bag. "Shut up Octavia!" Clarke said coldly before grabbing her bag to leave. This was just what she needed; for the sexy girl- who makes her stomach flip- to see her playing rugby in the sickly kit colors, sweaty and with her hair a complete mess. Perfect.

Clarke walked quickly; knowing her friends would catch up with her sooner or later. "Clarke, wait, I'm sorry!" Octavia grabbed Clarke's wrist to stop her from walking then looked to her apologetically. "Look, I was only joking back there... but... you know if there was anything you ever needed to tell me I will always care for you," Octavia swallowed as she watched Clarke's eyes glaze over with tears. "even if it was that you thought my bum is starting to lose its glory." She added, hoping to prompt a smile from the girl.

Clarke gulped; Octavia knew. She grabbed her arm and pulled her to sit down on a secluded bench; her head pounding as she processed what she was going to say. Why was this so hard? Octavia had been her best friend for years and she clearly already knew what was coming. Clarke's heart raced and her palms began to sweat. "Where um, wheres Raven?"

Octavia took Clarke's hands into her own; trying not to show her worry when she felt how moist they were. "Raven's getting some drinks for the team... She'll be a while."

Clarke took a deep breath in and quickly shook her head. She could do this. Hopefully. "Octavia," She moved her eyes from her friend to the ground; not wanting to see her reaction. "I, um, for a while I've been having... feelings... for girls... You know, the attraction kind..." Clarke paused, searching for the words she had rehearsed so many times in her head before this moment. "I'm bisexual Octavia." Clarke released a breath she didn't realize she'd been holding as she looked up to Octavia.

Octavia simply brought Clarke in for a hug, and whispered into her ear. "I know." Then squished her tightly.

Clarke quickly pushed her friend away so she could see her face. "What do you mean I know?" Of all the responses Clarke had played through her head; this wasn't one of them.

Octavia chuckled. "Well to be fair I thought you were going to tell me you were gay." Clarke furrowed her brow at this, not knowing what she meant. "Okay... So you know when I nicked your phone to text Jasper a few days back? Well... I kind of opened up the internet browser to search for this really funny picture of a-" Octavia noticed Clarke growing impatient. "Never mind. So anyway you left up a YouTube video called 'my coming out story'... I wasn't sure and thought maybe you were just watching the video for the hell of it, but then back in the cafe I saw the way you acted around Lexa, and your face after Raven said what she said... I just knew."

Clarke brought her knees up toward her chest; resting her chin on them. "Oh."

Octavia rubbed her hands up and down Clarke's shins; attempting to calm her. "You know you really should tell Raven, if anyone could help you out it'd be her."

"Tell Raven what?" Raven jumped on top of Octavia's lap and looked at Clarke excitedly. The pair simply stared at each other. "Oh come on. Spit it out Gryffindor!"

Clarke felt Octavia's hands against her legs and relaxed slightly. If she was telling one friend toda; why not all of them? "I'm bisexual." Clarke declared, this time with more confidence in her voice.

"YESS!" Raven screamed, putting her cups on the bench before pulling Clarke towards her and jumping up and down with her arms wrapped tightly around her neck. "Finallyyyyyyyy! Come to the dark side Clarke, we have boobs!"

Octavia laughed. "Hey, does this mean I'm on a team on my own?"

Raven sat down; pulling Clarke on top of her. "I dunno, were both bi so we both like guys which makes you on half our team I guess." She twitched her knees up and down as excitement filled her. "Oh my God can we go to gay bars together now?"

Clarke got off her knees; moving to sit between her two friends. "You always drag us to them anyhow?"

Raven grinned slyly. "Yes, but now I have some friendly competition."

Clarke groaned at the thought. "I don't think I'm ready for that yet."

Octavia drew Clarke back in for another hug. "Clarke has her eye on someone anyway." She began to wiggle her brows.

"Octavia!" Clarke trod on her foot forcefully.

"Ow, what! You totally have a thing for sexy Lexa." Octavia's brows continued to move.

"I so do not!" Clarke couldn't help but grin as she said this; her mind wandering to thought of Lexa's eyes.

"Oh my god you do!" Raven gasped; shocked that she hadn't figured this out earlier when Clarke became a incoherent mess at the sheer sight of the girl.

Clarke groaned and stood up. "Don't we have a game to get to?"

Octavia looked to her watch and jumped up. "Shit. Come on guys, we need to go so Clarke has time to eye up the competition."

Clarke picked up her bag; swinging it so it hit Octavia before threading her arm through the strap. "There is to be no mention of this to anyone. ANY OF IT."

Raven giggled as Octavia mimicked her friend. "ANY OF IT." She repeated, ducking to miss Clarke's bag making its second go for her face.

 

Chapter Text

Clarke slunk into the locker room behind Raven and Octavia, coming to a very sudden halt as she witnessed Lexa stood there in her black sports bra, her jaw becoming slack at the sight. "Clarke?" Octavia followed the girls eye line until she noticed Lexa too. "Clarke! Stop staring she's totally gonna see. Get it together." She waved her hand in front of the blondes eyes until she snapped back to reality.

"I, I uh didn't realize her tattoos were on her front as well." Clarke added nonchalantly as she moved to hide behind Raven.

"Hey, what are you doing Griffin? This is my spot!" Raven moved Clarke's gear back to her other side.

"I can't get changed in front of her guys. It's mortifying enough in front of a bunch of random strangers let alone her." Clarke gently beat her head against the locker door; taking comfort in how cold it was against her now very warm temple.

Octavia brought Clarke in for a hug. "It'll be fine. You have a killer body anyway so if anything you should take off all your clothes and simply parade around, that'd catch her attention." Octavia giggled as her friend groaned in her arms. "Come on, get dressed."

Clarke threw her hands up in defeat, moving to take her clothes off before pulling out her kit. This was one of the days she was beyond thankful she had accidentally worn matching underwear. Octavia moaned sarcastically at the sight, falling against her locker and raising the back of her hand to her face as she did. "Take me now Clarke, take me!"

Clarke quickly rolled up her shirt and hit her friend with it. "You can whip me any day you're dressed like that." Raven added before shooting her a cheeky wink.

"Oh shut up!" Clarke muttered bitterly whilst pulling her kit on. Clarke lifted her hair from underneath her shirt and looked up; quickly locking eyes with Lexa who was staring at her; her lip between her teeth. The both stood for a moment, lost in each others gaze before Lexa turned pink and turned away; noting that she had been caught.

Clarke's eyes remained on her back; wishing for her to turn around so she could stare at her for just that bit longer. "Hey, earth to Clarke!" Octavia waited for a minute before Clarke finally turned round to look at her. "Keep it in your pants, you need to have your mind on the game!"

Clarke hit Octavia, scared by how loud the girls voice was registering. "What position am I playing dork?"

Octavia giggled. "You'll be the left winger, Raven; the right." Clarke smiled at this; she had been dragged into Octavia's friendly matches early on in high school and knew that when she was wing she rarely ever touched the ball and could pretty much just stand around all game, letting the rest of the team do the work. "None of that standing around business though, you're meant to be on defense. I know offense is probably too much to ask but please try and at least work the defense behind the line."

Clarke's smile faded. It was as if Octavia knew exactly what she was thinking and wished to crush the only happy moment she had involving thoughts of this game. "Shit." she uttered beneath her breath following the trail of girls out towards the field.

"You'll be fine Clarke, it's just a fun game. Half of Lexa's team are just her friends who haven't played since high school anyway." Octavia patted her friend on the back.

Clarke simply groaned. Octavia's idea of 'fun' was far from what she envisioned. "So..." She pondered; if she was going to be a part of this she may as well enjoy the sights that came with it. "what is Lexa's favorite position?"

Raven and Octavia doubled over in laughter, Clarke's face quickly becoming hot as she understood what she had said. "I, I, I uh mean... what position is she playing?"

Octavia took a very slight break from her snorting to reply to the poor girl. "She's a fly-half." Clarke stared at her, brow furrowed in confusion. "She's number 10... she's quick thinking, fast and kicks like a machine." Octavia added, hoping to quickly clarify this without a 3 hour discussion on the matter.

"Is she good at catching?" Raven asked, a sly look on her face.

"Yeah... I guess..." Octavia answered cautiously; she had seen that look on her friends face many times before and it had never ended well.

Raven grinned and nudged Clarke's shoulder with her own. "So Lexa's good with her hands?"

Before Clarke could punch the girl she ran ahead of them, an evil chuckle echoing through the hall as they made their way to the field. "Asshole!" Clarke shouted, embarrassment washing over her as everyone turned around in question of who she was referring to; including Lexa, who pursed her lips suppressing a smile.

Clarke took her position on the field and began to fiddle with her shirt, wondering why one of the two subs on Lexa's team couldn't simply have taken her spot.


The game seemed to go on for hours, with Clarke managing to keep her distance from the ball for the most part. She'd been bored for the past hour and instead of watching the game now kept her gaze on Lexa, watching her muscular legs running across the grass. Lexa and her friends were different to the people she saw around campus. Their hair was long with plaits running through, and they wore black eyeliner with long wings that were always impeccable. But the thing that Clarke found herself mesmerized by most was their tattoos; Lexa's in particular. She had seen the brunette's top letters and tribal design that covered her back when they were in the cafe, then was stunned to see another tribal like design that trailed below her left breast under her sports bra, down along her waist then inward along her hip line whilst she was changing. Clarke's lips felt dry as her mind pondered where they might lead.

"Get out the way!" The words were loud and harsh, but Clarke's intense daze meant that she took no notice of them until the other girl slammed into her body, Clarke crashing beneath her weight.

"Oh shit, I am so sorry!" A girl with mousy brown hair leading into an almost blonde like mane lay above her, propping herself up on her elbows before jumping up. "I was under the impression you would have moved," She knelt back down seeing the cut on Clarke's forehead and motioned the girls over for help. "I'm Anya."

Clarke got up; her head suddenly pounding. "Clarke." She smiled, she was in pain but she did not wish for the girl to feel bad as it was really her fault for spacing out in the first place.

"Oh my God are you okay, I'm so sorry its totally my fault for making you play and I will make it up to you and-" Octavia hugged Clarke tightly, her head feeling dizzy as the embrace restricted her airflow.

"Octavia I'm fine." Clarke pushed her away slightly; though she enjoyed her friends hugs sometimes she felt as though she didn't realize her own strength.

"Woah what happened to you?" Lexa raised her palm to Clarke's face in worry, but quickly withdrew it remembering they didn't really know each other and this may have seemed a tad odd. Lexa moved her eyes from Clarke's and onto the ground, stepping back from the pair.

"I took her down big time..." Anya looked apologetically to Clarke, watching as the blood from her cut dripped down the side of her cheek.

"It was totally my fault I was-" Clarke stopped herself before the words came out; it may have seemed creepy to Lexa if she told her she was staring- and it's not like she would even like her back- for all Clarke knew this was how those straight girl crushes she read about on Tumblr were formed. "I was uh... thinking."

Octavia and Raven's eyes lit up at the hesitation on her lips, knowing fully well what she was busy thinking about. "I'd better take her to clean it up." Anya placed an arm around the blonde and started to lead her back to the locker room.

"Um, I'll take her?" Lexa's voice was slightly higher than usual and rang in a questioning tone. Why had she said this? Her mouth seemed to speak words often before she had time to filter them, and this was one of the times that she had really regretted it. All eyes fell on her and she felt her cheeks flush with heat. "I mean, Anya is one of our best players and I'm feeling slightly tired anyway."

A knowing smile appeared on Anya's face and Clarke simply looked at it in confusion. "Fair enough, here." Anya wrapped Clarke's arm around Lexa's neck, both of them growing pink at the contact.

Lexa turned and began to take Clarke towards the locker room. "So why were you drawing me earlier?" Clarke blushed and moved her gaze to the ground. Lexa winced at how forward she had been, quickly trying to rectify the tension. "It was really good, I liked it."

Clarke smiled. Was this flirting? She had never had to work out a girls sexuality before, let alone try to figure out if she liked her as well. "It was for class, my teacher Kane has got us doing this 'people observations' project. I've been drawing strangers for days."

Lexa felt a pang of hurt rise in her chest from this. Suddenly she felt less special and began to question all the signs she thought pointed to Clarke maybe liking girls. "Oh, I uh, I see." Lexa opened the locker room door then moved to sit Clarke on a bench, running to get the first aid kit.

Clarke winced as Lexa pulled out the antiseptic wipes and Lexa chuckled to herself; amused by how amazingly low the girls pain threshold was. "Hey, it's not funny!" Clarke laid down on the bench; closing her eyes to try and ease the thumping at her temple.

"Here." Lexa lifted the girls head onto her lap so she would be more comfortable. Clarke didn't open her eyes but her face hardened, trying not to focus at the rush of warmth she felt between her legs at the brunette's touch. Lexa cringed; was this weird? She saw Clarke's jaw clench and worried she had been too intimate- assuming she felt uncomfortable from the sudden tension on her face. Lexa began sterilizing the wound; hoping to distract her from what she had just done.

Clarke winced again and inhaled a sharp breath as the wipe stung her skin. "Could you be a bit more gentle, it really hurts."

Lexa tried to muffle the laugh but failed as it brushed loudly past her lips. Clarke shot her a jokey, offended look. "I'm sorry, I will be more careful." Lexa tried not to worry Clark as she fumbled around in the bag bringing a towel to her face before pulling out a pack of butterfly stitches.

Clarke's eyes flew open at the sound of the packet tearing. "Woah what are you doing?"

Lexa bit her lip, suppressing the smile that grew on her face watching the girl's adorable panic taking over. "It's okay they're just butterfly stitches Clarke."

Clarke swallowed, Lexa had said her name and her mind wandered to what she'd sound like moaning it. Clarke quickly shook her head, dismissing the sensation that was growing within her. "Uh, I uh..." Clarke tried to process the other words that had come out of her mouth. "Stitches!? You're not a doctor!" Clarke sat up, worry in her face. She had seen Octavia do some pretty weird stuff- last summer she even pierced her own belly button using teething gel as a numbing agent- and she knew rugby players were tough, but this was gross.

Lexa quickly grabbed her arm before she could move away. "Hey, it's not gonna hurt, they are stick on ones Clarke."

Clarke felt the heat rush to her face as embarrassment coursed through her. Of course they were. Lexa's hand moved up her arm and to her face, pulling her slowly down towards her own. Clarke held her breath as she tried not to focus on how beautiful Lexa's lips were and how much she wished for them to be on her own. Lexa lent in and Clarke continued to hold her breath as thoughts sped through her mind; convincing herself this was going to happen.

Lexa raised her other hand to Clarke's face; Clarke unintentionally frowning as she applied the butterfly stitches to her head. "There," Lexa moved back before she made Clarke feel too uncomfortable. "you're good to go." She muttered before moving to place the first aid kit back. Clarke groaned slightly and threw her head back down on the bench; hoping to erase what just happened from her mind.

"Hey girls, guess who won?!" Octavia entered the room with the rest of her team, her arms raising up to the ceiling as she cockily strutted her way up to Clarke.

"How?" Lexa demanded, assuming some foul play must have been at work.

Anya sighed patting her teammate on the back. "Sometimes shit just happens."

Lexa and Anya burst out into laughter as they considered the fact they had actually lost to Octavia's thrown together team. "Don't get too happy Octavia; we'll be playing on the same team for the season remember."

Octavia laughed as she contemplated how quickly they'd be out of the league if they played as badly as they did tonight. "Oh dear." She sat Clarke up beside her and began running her fingers through her hair; knowing that this tended to calm her.

Lexa watched on, feeling jealousy flow through her as she saw Octavia and how intimate she was being with her friend. She forcefully grabbed her towel and hurried off to the showers, needing to get away.

"Where's she off to in such a hurry?" Anya asked; worried as to why her friend had left the way she did.

"Beats me." Octavia raised her shoulders.

"I should probably go check she's okay. You know how hard she finds it to lose, let alone to you guys!" Anya winked at Octavia who had plastered a sarcastic 'oh I'm so hurt' look across her face.


Lexa closed her eyes and felt the water cover her, washing away the pain she felt observing the blonde girl. Lexa had fallen for girls who were straight many times before, and it only ever ended in her winding up hurt. She let her mind drift as she washed her hair, thinking back to the moment she saw Clarke in the cafe; how beautiful she had looked with her pink cheeks. She shook her head- she would not let her mind go there. Lexa quickly washed the shampoo out then turned the shower off; wrapping a towel around herself before leaving the cubicle. She stopped immediately outside as Anya stood there waiting; a worried look on her face. "What's up with you this afternoon? Your head wasn't in the game earlier and then you storm off into the showers?"

Lexa rested her back against the wall and let herself crumple to the floor; pulling her knees towards her chest. "I like Clarke."

Anya breathed a sigh of relief before falling down next to her friend. "So, tell her?" She lightly nudged Lexa's shoulder with her own.

"It's not that simple and you know it." Lexa buried her face into her knees, grumbling. "She's probably straight anyway, I've rarely fallen for girls who turn out to be interested in girls. It's like that's my type. Ragingly heterosexual and unavailable."

Anya rubbed Lexa's back; she was right. She had seen it happen to her time and time again; Lexa would meet a girl, she'd fall for them, then they'd act like they couldn't get far enough away from her when they found out she was gay. "I can ask Octavia if you would like? Bring it up in conversation?"

Lexa groaned again. "It's fine, she'll be straight, the way she acted earlier when I was doing her stitches, it was just like she was thinking of an escape plan."

Anya shook her head. "I'm sure that's not the case," She jumped up, pulling at Lexa's arm until she stood. "now put a smile on that face because we need to go back in there so you can get changed; we're all going back to Octavia's for food."

Lexa moaned loudly. "Is Clarke gonna be there?"

Anya laughed. "I would assume so; she is her roommate after all."

Lexa's eyes widened. She couldn't do this. "I think I'm just gonna go back to our dorm room."

Anya quickly moved her head from side to side. "Nu uh, you're coming with me. End of."


Octavia turned to Clarke trying not to smile as she saw her eyes gleaming when Lexa walked in; her body adorned with a thin towel. "You should just ask her out."

Clarke slammed her locker shut and quickly pulled her black skinny jeans up. "No way, I doubt she's even into girls." Octavia smiled cockily; she knew something. "What?" Clarke took a large swig from her water bottle; she was intrigued as to what her friend was thinking about.

Octavia turned to make sure no one was near to listen into their conversation. "Lexa's gay Clarke." Clarke spat the water she was holding in her cheeks directly onto her friends face. "What the hell!"

Clarke pinned Octavia against the locker. "Do not mess with me O you know that's just cruel!"

Octavia laughed. "I would never joke about something like that you idiot. She came out last year; it was kind of the talk of the school for like a month."

Clarke's eyes lit up as something clicked. "Shes the sexy brunette that got caught making out with the cheerleader that time isn't she?"

Octavia simply beamed at Clarke, nodding enthusiastically. "Don't bring that up though, that girl turned out to be a total bitch, she told Lexa 'girls are just practice for the guys I'll be dating' then totally outed her to her friends."

Clarke felt suddenly very sad as she thought of this, rage building within her; wanting to defend the girl then wrap up with her in the safety of her duvet. "That's horrible."

Octavia patted the blonde on the shoulder. "So everyone's coming back to ours... Maybe you could show Lexa your room for a private drawing session?" Octavia waggled her brows at Clarke then gasped. "Oh my God it'd be like The L Word meets Titanic!"

Clarke wanted to frown but couldn't help but smile at the thought of that motion picture and nodded. "That would be epic, but no that's not going to happen. Octavia, I haven't even kissed a girl, I'm hardly gonna jump into bed with one the day I come out to you guys."

Octavia narrowed her eyes. "It could happen." She threw her kit bag over her arm before grabbing Clarke to head back to their room with the rest of the team.

 

Chapter Text

 

Clarke frowned; Lexa had spent the entire walk back to their apartment completely avoiding her. She knew she was gay; maybe she thought Clarke wasn't attractive. Nausea grew in the pit of Clarke's stomach; it would be one thing to be rejected by a girl because she was straight, but being rejected by a girl who thought she wasn't good looking was a whole lot worse.

Octavia opened the door and the girls filed into the room, throwing their kit bags by the door before slumping into chairs and beanbags, making themselves at home. That was everyone apart from Lexa. Lexa sat awkwardly on a bar stool by their kitchen area; her knuckles white from her tight grip on it. Clarke swallowed. She began to feel lightheaded as panic set in. Had she made Lexa feel this awkward? Clarke scoured her mind; wondering if her staring had been what made her uncomfortable.

"Drinks!" Octavia opened a cupboard and pulled out a large array of bottles; from vodka to rum, if it packed a punch Octavia had some. She began laying out a selection of red cups before generously filling them with the liquids and handing them out. Clarke eagerly took a cup and quickly drunk the content before holding it back out to Octavia.

Octavia looked up in shock, pouring another drink but not questioning her as to why she was drinking so fast; she had a pretty good idea it involved Lexa though. "Slow down." She added, looking to Clarke as if she were a disapproving parent.

"Alright mom!" Clarke smiled convincingly at Octavia to show her she was okay, but Octavia somehow didn't buy it.

"Lexa whats your poison?" Octavia waved the bottles in the air in a tempting manner.

Lexa tightened her grip on the chair. "Nothing for me."

Anya walked up to Octavia holding out a second cup. "Vodka straight." Octavia raised an eyebrow- impressed by the choice- then she obliged, quickly pouring the drink. Anya hurried to Lexa's side holding out the beverage. "Drink." She nodded to the cup of vodka in her hand.

Lexa shook her head. "I don't want any."

Anya pulled up a stool next to her, giving her bicep a slight squeeze before sitting down. "Lexa, you're too worried about this. If she's straight so what, there's plenty of women out there who'd be lucky to have you."

Lexa grabbed the cup and took a large sip; immediately regretting it when heat ripped through her throat. "Vodka straight?" Anya nodded and chuckled to herself, Lexa narrowing her eyes at the hilarity she found in the act. "It's not that simple, when I looked at Clarke I felt the way I felt about Costia... maybe even stronger than the way Costia made me feel."

Anya raised her brows. She knew how hard Lexa had fallen for Costia last year and she rarely brought her up since things between them ended; so for Lexa to compare her feelings for a girl she had just met to those of Costia was a rather huge deal. Anya began to rub circles on the small of Lexa's back. "I shall ask Octavia of Clarke's sexuality now then, that way it's over and done with; bandage ripped off."

Lexa grabbed Anya's arm before she could walk away. "No! You can't! Anya please... I know she's going to be straight, I just, I know."

Anya pulled Lexa's head onto her chest whispering. "Then it won't hurt if I go and confirm that." Before darting off to go find Octavia.

Lexa moaned and started to drink; she knew Clarke would find out that Anya had inquired, and it was only a matter of time before she looked at her with a look of disgust or awkwardness she'd seen too many times before.

Anya dropped onto Octavia's lap. "Anya!" The girls roared, greeting their teammate.

"Hey!" Anya smiled then dipped her head closer to Octavia's, lowering her voice before she talked. "Can we talk in your room for a second?"

Octavia put her drink on the table. "Hey guys I've just gotta show Anya something. We'll be right back!"

Octavia dragged Anya into her room, shutting the door firmly behind them. "Whats up? Is this about how everyone played earlier? I think we'll be okay for the season... It was a friendly game so I guess the girls were just having a bit too much fun and let their guard dow-"

"What is Clarke's sexuality?"

Octavia choked. She was not expecting this. "Why?"

Anya lent back on the bed. "Please, just answer the question."

Octavia cocked her eyebrow. "It's not my place to say, ask Clarke."

Anya grunted. "Fine. Lexa has a slight thing for her and wants to know... she didn't want to ask her because she's been rejected so many times because they always happen to be straight. She didn't want me to ask though because she's suddenly made up her mind that Clarke's straight for some reason."

Octavia began to laugh hysterically. "I'm sorry, it's not funny, but I literally had the same 'whats her sexuality' conversation with Clarke back in the locker room."

A slight grin tugged at the corner of Anya's mouth. "So she's into girls?"

"Yeah, Clarke's bisexual. Don't tell anyone other than Lexa though, Clarke only came out to me this morning after I caught her checking Lexa out." Octavia realized she probably should have checked with Clarke before sharing this but two strong drinks down the line she was feeling a bit more open than usual. Anya's jaw dropped slightly. "Why so shocked Anya?"

Anya laughed. "It's not that I'm shocked about Clarke, it's more Lexa has a bad history with every girl she likes turning out to be straight. She said some things that told me she's really into Clarke... I guess I was just getting prepared to buy the ice cream and spend the next week watching friends reruns on Netflix."

Octavia snorted. "It's better than watching Orphan Black and Orange is The New Black OVER and OVER."

Anya's eyes widened. "You do not have to tell me about that. Lexa watches them religiously. She has the Orange is The New Black new season release date on her calendar." She got up from the bed, helping Octavia up too. "I should probably go tell Lexa this before she gets too drunk over the matter."

Octavia tried not to laugh at just how similar she was realizing Lexa was to her best friend. "I should go tell Clarke too, she was throwing them back after Lexa gave her the cold shoulder on the way home... somehow I doubt either of them will be all that sober."

They headed out of Octavia's bedroom, Anya grabbing Lexa and dragging her into an empty bedroom before shutting the door.

Lexa threw herself onto the bed, rather intoxicated as the vodka worked its way through her system. "I can't believe you did that! Octavia's going to think I'm such an idiot, then she'll tell Clarke and they'll laugh about what a idiot I am together."

Anya couldn't help but chuckle at how emotional Lexa was when drunk "Lexa, don't tell anyone because she hasn't come out yet but Clarke's bisexual."

Lexa suddenly felt very sober as she heard the words leave Anya's lips. "Seriously?"

"Yep... Apparently she came out to Octavia this morning after she caught Clarke checking you out back at the cafe."

Lexa raised her eyebrows in shock; digesting the words she never thought she would hear. Before Anya could stop her Lexa swung the door open and exited the room; heading directly for Clarke who was drunkenly moaning at Octavia to 'fill her up'.

"Clarke," Lexa tried to process what she would say- what she would do. Clarke wasn't out yet and she had to respect this; she would have a conversation with her in another room her where no one could hear.

Clarke seeing Lexa threw her arms around her neck; taking her and the rest of the room by surprise. "Clarke," Octavia attempted to pull the blonde off of Lexa before she did something she would thoroughly regret the next morning.

Sadly; Clarke wasn't having this and latched on tighter to Lexa; moving her face so it was right before Lexa's. "No Octavia! I'm not going with you, I need to tell Lexa that I love her, I want do shots off of her belly while I look at her pretty tattoos and then I want to kiss her. I want to kiss her a lot" The words slurred out of Clarke's lips as she looked into Lexa's eyes.

Lexa smiled smugly at the thought. She would like that too. "Come on Clarke, maybe it's time for you to sleep this off." Octavia pulled at her again, this time managing to dislodge her from the girl and proceeding to drag her slowly towards the room.

"Can Lexa sleep over? I don't want to sleep in my room alone when it's all dark and scary." Clarke collapsed onto her bed.

"No, Lexa has to head back to her own room tonight Clarke." Octavia laughed as Clarke frowned and threw her sheets over her head; acting like a complete child.

"Actually it's fine, I haven't got class tomorrow so I'll stay." Lexa pulled off her clothes so she was in her underwear then climbed in beside Clarke. "Mmmm you smell nice Clarke."

Anya and Octavia shook their heads at the drunk pair who were now laid there, eyes closed and snuggling in Clarke's bed. "Well I guess this shall be interesting to explain to them in the morning."

Anya smiled, Lexa hadn't been this happy in a long time so she didn't wish to see the content expression taken away from her any time soon. "Are you sure it's okay to leave her here? I can always take her in a cab?"

Octavia nodded. "Yeah, they look so damn adorable together, I don't think that I could part them if I wanted to."

Chapter Text

Clarke inhaled; smiling as the smell of pancakes filled her nose. Though Octavia’s cooking was limited at times, she always knew how to make the best hangover foods. Clarke rolled over to stretch out- refusing to open her eyes and accept the duties of the day- only to find her arm landing on a body. The body groaned as she struck her, it was a girl. Clarke began to panic. It was not Octavia as someone had to be making the food, and it was definitely not Raven or she would have been thrown off the bed for waking her. Clarke’s breath caught in her chest when she saw the brown curls that draped over her cover. It was Lexa. Lexa was in her bed. Clarke gently lifted the covers and peaked beneath them, her pupils dilating as she took in Lexa’s beautiful tan skin and black lace underwear. A moan escaped her mouth and loudly filled the air between them, a slight smile tugging at Lexa’s mouth as she did. “Are you done admiring me?”

Clarke immediately dropped the sheets and sat up; her face burning as Lexa opened her eyes setting them firmly upon the blonde. “H, how long have you been awake for?”

Lexa chuckled lightly and sat up next to Clarke; pulling the sheets up to cove her. “A while, Octavia has been fighting a losing battle with your pan by the sounds of things.”

Clarke shook her head, a grin appearing on her face. “She somehow has this belief when making pancakes that she can flip them... Yet years later her pan eye coordination is still non existent... and she is yet to give up.”

Clarke suddenly wondered, if Lexa wasn’t clothed, what was she wearing? She lifted the cover only slightly then peaked underneath, unintentionally gasping when she saw she too, was only in her underwear.

Lexa took note of this, laughing to herself. “You decided at roughly three am that you were too hot and proceeded to remove your clothing whilst singing ‘it’s getting hot in here’.”

Clarke cringed, really wishing Lexa would have simply left the second part out. “I’m sorry.”

Lexa’s brow furrowed as she watched Clarke turn a darker shade of red. “Don’t be, I did not mind the sight.”

She quickly hopped out of the bed grabbing her clothing and using it to cover her almost bare body. “We should get dressed, Octavia will be in soon to wake us up if we don’t make an appearance soon.”

Clarke went to enter the bathroom but was stopped by the girl clearing her throat. “May I trouble you for some clothes? I think I had a collision with my vodka last night.” The brunette gestured to the pile of crumpled clothing by the bed.

“Sure.” Clarke turned and opened her draw immediately skimming past the underwear; they were not that close yet, and she felt that chances are Lexa would mock her days of the week panties.

Lexa sat taking in Clarke from behind, biting her lip as her eyes scaled down her bare back then along her hips to her perfect ass. “Saturday huh?”

Following Lexa’s eye line Clarke quickly concluded she was staring at her bum; soon realizing she had a pair of the unfortunate panties in question on. “Fuck.” She muttered to herself, hoping to die and be buried in underwear that Lexa at least wouldn’t laugh at. “Don’t mock me, I’m not that much of a dork I swear.”

Lexa shook her head. “That’s not why I’m laughing.” She hopped of the bed and made her way up behind Clarke, trailing a finger tip over the letters across the girls bum. “It’s Friday Clarke, meaning you wore your Saturday knickers on a Thursday.”

Clarke shuddered at Lexa’s touch. This was definitely flirting. “Are you into girls?” Clarke pressed her eyes shut tightly, as soon as the words had left her mouth. Why had she said that? She braced herself waiting to be shot down or laughed at but instead the girl let her hand fall from Clarke’s panties and trail down the outside of her thigh.

“I’m gay Clarke.” Lexa presumed the blonde had little memory of last night from the question. “And you are bi right?”

Clarke turned quickly, breath haltering in her chest as her nose touched Lexa’s; forgetting how close she was. “Who told you that?” Her voice was panicked; she had no memory of the previous night and worry was setting in.

“Don’t worry, Anya told me. I think her and Octavia were conspiring to get us together.”
Clarke exhaled. Thank God; her secret was as safe as she wanted it to be. Lexa’s face remained apprehensive though, making Clarke’s stomach knot. “What is it you are leaving out Lexa?”

Lexa paused, contemplating whether or not to tell the girl; finally deciding that she may as well as it would only be someone else who did if she did not, and they may be less considerate about the matter. “You may have declared your feelings for me in front of the entire team.”

The blonde’s jaw dropped. “Feelings for you. Pfft,” She muttered nervously after a minute of contemplating the scene.

Lexa seemed slightly hurt by this. “You declared that you wished to kiss me... A lot. Then there was talk of admiring my tattoos and I even believe body shots were mentioned.”

Clarke felt her knees buckle as she slumped against the draws for support, Lexa bracing her as she did. “Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

Lexa narrowed her eyes. “They will not judge you Clarke. The girls on the team are lovely people.”

Clarke pressed her palm to her temple. “Did we... Y’know...”

Lexa followed Clarke’s eye line to the bed and quickly shook her head. “No, I wold not take advantage of you like that. I mean yes we shared a bed- I was rather drunk myself- but I was sober enough to know acting upon any feelings in that moment would have been wrong.”

Clarke sighed with relief, immediately regretting it as she saw a pang of hurt in the brunettes face. “Don’t be hurt. I just meant I would like to remember that kind of thing.”

Lexa nodded and grasped the clothing from her hands. “I should get dressed.”

Clarke nodded, then pulled out fresh clothes for herself; opting against the days of the week underwear for a sexy black lace number that Lexa’s eyes lingered upon for slightly too long. “I am by the way,” Lexa looked perplexed. “bisexual that is.” Clarke grabbed her clothes and ran off to the bathroom before the staring became too intense.

Lexa had not meant to gawk but the confirmation of this in Clarke’s sober state was something she was holding her breath for. Once Clarke left she quickly did a happy dance before getting her emotions in check. She needed to focus on getting dressed and eating. God, food sounded so good. Her stomach began to grumble at the thought of eating the syrup... Eating Clarke’s syrup... Eating Clarke’s syrup off her naked body. Lexa quickly shook her head to dismiss the images that flooded to her mind.

 

Clarke got out the shower and quickly threw on her clothes. She had no classes today so that escape plan wouldn’t fly. It wasn’t that she wished to flee from Lexa as such... more that she could not stand the sexual tension that sat between them for any longer without mounting the girl. Clarke let her hair down and rearranged it in the mirror before turning to head into the kitchen. Lexa was sat alone with Octavia, both of their mouths stuffed with pancakes as they laughed over something. Oh God. What had she told her? Clarke normally felt safe in he comfort of Octavia, but she knew fully well if Octavia thought she was aiding the match making process by telling Lexa of how Clarke peed herself on a school field trip to the museum; she would do it.

“I hope I’m not interrupting anything.” Clarke pulled up a bar stool and poked at her pancakes with her fork, the nausea of the hangover setting in as she stared at the food before her.

“I was just telling Lexa of that field trip we took.”

Clarke squeezed her eyes shut and slid her pancakes around the plate. She would have to have a serious conversation about this with her later. “Great.” She mumbled bitterly; slamming her fork into the pile.

“I thought it was cute.” Lexa grinned.

Clarke looked up to Octavia who was nodding whilst Lexa looked away mouthing. “I told you so, it always works.”

Clarke let a smile slip from her lips over the fact Lexa had called her cute, then piled the pancakes into her mouth. “So what have you guys got planned for today?” Octavia’s tone was high and suggestive, her brow’s wiggling until Clarke firmly punted her toes into the girls shin; causing her to wince and stop.

Lexa watched to two exchange glares and decided to breach the air; knowing she was missing out on something. “I don’t actually have any plans for today. My class was canceled and Anya is an ass when she’s hungover.”

Octavia grinned. “I know the type.” She nodded towards Clarke who mocked and extremely hurt face then hit her shoulder, giggling.

“Oh fuck off. I’m an absolute delight.” She beamed at Lexa.

“Oh lies Griffin. Absolute LIES.” Octavia wandered to the sink throwing her plate in.

Clarke’s face suddenly turned serious and Lexa gawked at her. “Oh fuck no Clarke!” Octavia ran to her side putting an arm over her shoulder.

“Whats wrong?” Lexa threw Clarke’s other arm over her shoulder but Clarke tried to push her away.

“She’s gonna throw up. Clarke I told you not to drink that much, you know you can’t handle it the next day!”

Clarke groaned and tried to push Lexa away. “Wait out here. You cant, see me, like this.”

Lexa shook her head taking all Clarke’s weight from Octavia, moving her to rest her head over the toilet, stepping behind the girl and holding her back hair while Clarke threw up. “Trust me, I’ve seen worse.”

Clarke threw her head into the toilet as she heaved. “Ew gross!” Octavia watched on in horror.

“Hey, I’ve got this Octavia. If you can just get her some water.” Lexa gently rubbed Clarke’s back, shushing her as she held her tightly, Clarke’s body convulsing in her embrace. “It’ll be okay.” She whispered, tears falling down Clarke’s cheeks as the nausea took over her entirely.

Octavia returned with the cup placing it by the toilet. “Clarke I have that lecture this morning, I can skip it if you’re too ill though?”

Clarke groaned and spoke between retches. “No, you can’t miss another lecture, you’re, already behind.”

Clarke wiped her mouth and flushed the toilet, leaning into Lexa’s embrace; too ill to feel embarrassed. “Hey it’s cool I’ve got this until your done.” Lexa looked to Octavia who then looked down to her best friend, searching for a confirmation that this was okay. Clarke nodded and Octavia tried to suppress the ‘awhhhh’ that she was feeling watching the two cuddle on the bathroom floor.

“You don’t have to do that.” Clarke mumbled dismissively. “I’ll be okay on my own.”

Lexa smoothed a tendril of blonde hair behind the girls ear. “It’s fine. I want to.”

Chapter Text

After 20 minutes of becoming well acquainted with the bathroom toilet, Lexa walked Clarke to the couch; placing a blanket over her, then walking to turn the television on. It was a rare event that she found herself caring for someone; with Anya she made her drinks but felt no need to mother her and even with Costia, she would simply put on a film and make up an excuse to leave later on. It wasn't that she was cruel, more she didn't know what to do, and didn't particularly want to catch anything. With Clarke things were somehow different; she wanted to sit by her side and watch her sleep, rub her back whilst she was sick and just hold her until she was better. This worried Lexa, caring for someone this much who she'd only just met was a recipe for disaster, yet she couldn't stop herself from falling.

"What is it you would like to watch Clarke?" Lexa handed Clarke the remote sitting down beside the girl, pulling her legs on top of her lap. Clarke began to lightly shake with laughter as she flicked through Netflix. "What do you find amusing?"

Clarke suppressed a smile and focused on the television. "It's nothing. Just sometimes you're so formal. It's sweet."

Lexa blushed and too, moved her focus to the screen. "What are you putting on?"

Clarke looked to Lexa. "What's your stance on Orphan Black? I mean I've watched each season twice over with Octavia and she refuses to watch it with me anymore."

Lexa grinned. "I love it, and yes; Anya has reached the same point with me."

Clarke's smile grew as she selected the first episode then pulled the cover further over her and Lexa. "Thank you for staying with me by the way... I know I'm hardly great company at this time."

Lexa ran her hand up and down Clarke's leg- the blonde shivering at her touch. "It's fine, but if you don't mind I'd prefer our next date be one where I can buy you dinner and woo you."

Clarke bit her lip to hide the intense happiness she felt at the idea. "I guess that sounds acceptable," She moved so that she was between Lexa's legs, her head resting on the brunette's chest as they bot laid on the sofa. "but I'll be paying."

Lexa scoffed beneath her. "I call dibs."

Clarke frowned and moved her hand beneath the girls shirt, tracing her fingers so that it tickled Lexa. "Surrender and let me pay."

She moved to grab Clarke's hand, threading her fingers through her own. "You are in no state for war Clarke, and I invited you, so it is my duty to pay."

Lexa smiled as she felt the ripples of light laughter course through the girl's body. "Fine." Clarke wanted to resist but feeling the girls fingers between her own was making her head fuzzy; the simple contact washing away any kind of resistance she'd wished to show.


Clarke quickly fell asleep in Lexa's arms. It wasn't until Octavia returned with Anya that she woke, still in the girls embrace.

"Well that progressed quickly." Anya chuckled looking at her friend. "Do you want me to get the U-Haul Lex?"

Lexa quickly narrowed her eyes at the girl. "What you don't hear from the lesbian U-Haul stories is the part where we use them to run over our evil friends."

Anya raised her hands to her heart. "Ouch Lex, that one hurt."

Octavia and Anya threw themselves into beanbags across from the sofa. "So what are you naming your children?" Octavia raised a brow.

"Fuck off asshole!" Clarke grumbled from beneath the blanket.

"She lives!" Octavia cheered, running over to her before pulling the cover down and kissing her repeatedly on the forehead. "I, missed, you, so, much."

"Ew gross O, get off me!" Clarke pushed her friend away laughing at how sappy she was.

Lexa's jaw had tensed slightly seeing Octavia kiss Clarke, something that Anya noticed. "Well we should be off now, as much as you two probably wanna roll around in bed for a couple hours, Lexa and I have essays to start."

Lexa groaned; Anya was right but she still hated her for taking Clarke away from her. "Hey," Clarke pulled Lexa back before she could walk away. "number." She held out her phone and pulled a puppy dog face that made Lexa want to kiss her, even with everyone watching.

She quickly pulled her mind away from the thought and took Clarke's phone to input her number. "There."

Anya and Octavia groaned, and Lexa quickly realized she had been staring at Clarke for a good minute. "Shit, sorry Anya," She turned to look over her shoulder at Clarke. "Bye princess." Lexa winked at her cockily before heading out the door.

A pillow slammed into Clarke's face dragging her back to reality. "Spill."

Octavia was sat at her feet with a tub of Ice cream and a massive smile on her face. "Nothing happened O!" Octavia narrowed her eyes in disbelief. "Seriously!" Clarke sat up so Octavia could turn and face her. "Lexa held my hair for a while, then she laid with me whilst we watched Orphan Black."

Octavia let out a horrific groan at the mention of the show. "I just want to know if she's a good kisser Clarke, cut to the juicy stuff!"

Clarke shook her head at her friend. "I haven't kissed her yet."

The brunettes mouth flopped open revealing a mouth full of cookie dough ice cream. "What?"

"Well we didn't last night, then this mornings mood was kind of ruined by my massive puke fest. Oh God what if she never wants to kiss me after that? I mean I wouldn't blame her I was a total gross mess an-"

"Clarke chill, your doing that thing where you panic about silly things. By what I walked in on Lexa has already completely fallen for you; any one else would have jumped at the out I gave her to leave. Clarke, the girl stayed to hold your hair while you puke. If that's not love then I don't know what is."


Anya shut the door. watching her roommate closely as she dropped onto the sofa; a huge soppy grin plastered on her face. "I haven't seen that look in a while Lex, you've got it bad for Clarke hey?"

Lexa quickly hardened her face and swallowed. "No. I mean yeah, I like her I guess."

Anya walked to the kitchen grabbing a couple waters. "Lexa, don't treat me like I'm stupid. I know how you are around sick people."

The girl's eyes narrowed at her roommate. "Maybe you're just annoying when your ill."

Anya threw one of the waters at Lexa. "I am lovely company when I'm ill... And you are avoiding the question. So whens your next date?"

Lexa turned the lid on the water taking a sip as she processed her answer. "I dunno."

"Oh stop it already!" Anya shook Lexa until she grinned.

"Okay fine, I'm going to take her out to dinner; we are yet to set a date."

Anya smiled at her accomplishment, drawing information out of her roommate was never an easy feat. "What about Gustus'?"

Lexa shook her head. "I hardly wish to subject Clarke to the humor of my uncle on our first date."

"You know as well as I do that Gustus would be lovely," Anya popped open a bag of crisps, chewing on them as she spoke. "and that does happen to be the best restaurant around anyway. He sure knows how to blow people away with his cooking, why not make Clarke one of them."

Lexa pinched the bridge of her nose; it was true. Though she did not wish for Clarke to meet her family so soon, it really was better food then they would find elsewhere that close to campus. Her phone lit up, quickly distracting her from the thought.

Unknown: Hey this is my number- Clarke xx

Before Lexa could reply she felt the phone being wrenched out of her hands. "Hey, give it back!"

Anya unfortunately was taller than Lexa, allowing her to easily hold the phone out of her reach whilst she fiddled with it. "Oooh two kisses. She liiiikes you!"

Lexa felt herself blushing as Anya returned the phone to her the message now read:

Blonde Hottie: Hey this is my number- Clarke xx

"Real funny Anya." Lexa shook her head in disapproval of the girl who was quietly laughing to herself. Lexa pulled out her phone and began to type; smiling as she knew what would appear on Clarke's screen.

Sexy Tattooed Babe: Missing me already?x

Blonde Hottie: Maybe a bit Octavia is refusing to watch OB with me and now I'm stuck watching 90210 xx

Lexa grinned as the reply.

Sexy Tattooed Babe: That sucks, maybe we can watch it after dinner? How does tomorrow at 7pm sound?x

Lexa stared at her phone, worrying ten minutes later when she was still awaiting a reply. Finally her screen lit up and she exhaled with relief, bringing it closer to her face.

Blonde Hottie: Sorry O stole my phone and has changed your contact photo to a picture of Gollum from Lord of the Rings

Blonde Hottie: I should also explain that she did this after changing your name to 'my precious'

Blonde Hottie: I have stolen her ice cream and she is now very sorry and said to say she thinks your much prettier than Gollum

Blonde Hottie: That sounds perfect... Can't wait :) What's the dress code?xx

Lexa chuckled to herself as the messages popped up.

My Precious: Whatever you would like, I have a feeling you could make a trash bag look stunning... x

It only took seconds for Clarke to reply this time.

Blonde Hottie: Smooth Lex, Smooth. but no, I need an idea of what's acceptable or I will no doubt panic about it for the next day xx

Anya glanced over Lexa's shoulder, laughing as she read the text on the girls screen. "Hmm that sounds like someone I know..." Lexa hit Anya before replying.

My Precious: Semi formal. A simple dress or nice trousers (not denim) is fine. x

Lexa replied with enough information she would hope for should the roles be reversed. It was only fair she give Clarke enough information to ease her panic.

Blonde Hottie: What will you be wearing?

My Precious: You'll just have to wait and see. ;) x

 

Chapter Text

Clarke threw her phone onto her bed. "Octavia I have absolutely nothing to wear and Lexa's going to be here so soon!"

Octavia stared at the massive collection of breathtaking clothes in her friends wardrobe and sighed. "Yeah, definitely nothing to wear." She shook her head at Clarke's evil stare- her friend rarely appreciated her sarcasm in times of anxiousness- then pulled out a simple short black dress with a plunging V neck. "What about this? It's not too formal but screams 'take me now, I haven't gotten any in a while'."

Clarke ripped the dress from Octavia's grasp throwing it on the bed whilst glaring at the girl. "It hasn't been THAT long O."

Octavia restrained the laughter she felt. "No, but it has since you experienced a lover other than your right hand." She waved her fingers at Clarke whose frown had deepened.

"Don't be an ass, and that just means Lexa will be all that more impressed by my hand's stamina tonight." Clarke raised her brow at her friend who began miming an extreme gagging motion in response.

"I could have easily gone my whole life without picturing that. Now put on the dress you hot piece of ass." Octavia winked at Clarke before moving to head out the room, a pillow hitting her square in the head as she exited. "Hey, asshole! I thought you needed to conserve that energy for you activities with Lexa." Octavia smirked at Clarke's slack jaw, an evil laugh escaping her mouth as she left; knowing she had won this battle.

Clarke huffed and threw herself back onto the bed; her eyes staring at the blank ceiling above as she tried to relax. This was until her phone lit up moments later.

My Precious: On my way up, hope you're ready Clarke. ;)

Shit. Clarke swallowed and sat up grabbing the dress before throwing it over her shoulders. "Octavia I need you to zip me up, Lexa's gonna be here in like two minutes and I'm a fucking wreck," Clarke waited a total of 20 seconds (if that) before angrily swinging the door open and heading out to the kitchen in search of her friend. "Octavia pleaseeeee I don't want her to leave me at the place because I'm a total state!" Clarke moved her eyes up to scan the kitchen only to stop in her tracks; seeing Octavia sat on the sofa with a very amused looking Lexa staring at her fiddling with her zip.

Lexa moved behind the blonde after a moment of her simply staring at her with her mouth wide in shock. "For what its worth I don't think I could even take my eyes off you let alone leave you in this dress." Lexa's voice was low as she whispered into Clarke's ear, her hand carefully bringing the zip up the back while her eyes lingered on the black lace of Clarke's bra, the sight willing her to forget the date entirely and perhaps just move things to her room. Lexa swallowed and quickly shook her head to dismiss the image.

"So where are you two love birds going?"

The two girls heads shot up to acknowledge the brunette; remembering they weren't alone. "Oh, uh," Lexa blushed as she realized Octavia had probably seen her eyeing up her friend. "that's um... It's a surprise."

Octavia slouched in the chair and grunted. "Well Clarke, you shall be telling me of it in the morning, and also Clarke, please bare in mind that I have a test early tomorrow and I would like to sleep well, so no late night noises if you catch my drift."

Clarke felt the red creeping up her neck as she shot Octavia a death glare. "Lexa perhaps we should go before Octavia puts her foot in her mouth again."

Lexa chuckled as Octavia simply wiggled her brows at the girls before pulling off a sock and chucking it at the blonde. "For your door handle."

"Dear God." Clarke's mortification was interrupted by Lexa helpfully dragging her towards the door.

"You treat her well Lexa."

"I'll have her back by 12 Miss Blake." Lexa quickly ducked out of the room and slammed the door; hearing Octavia's other sock hitting it just after, followed by a muffled but loud 'don't sass me woman'.

Clarke gulped as she finally scanned her eyes up and down Lexa's body; taking in her amazingly sexy, skinny but formal, black trousers and white shirt that was buttoned down so that her chest was slightly visible. "I'm sorry, Octavia can be very... protective." Clarke managed to move her eye line up long enough to reply before following Lexa down the hallway to head down the short flight of stairs.

"That's okay, she's a ray of light compared to Anya."

Clarke tried to focus on opening the door but Lexa's shoulder was brushing against hers and it was making any focusing on things- other than Lexa's proximity to her- very hard.

Lexa pulled out the keys and a car beeped in front of them taking Clarke by surprise. "This is your car?"

Lexa moved to open the door of the black, open top Jeep Wrangler; holding it open for Clarke then motioning for her to get in. "Yeah it makes transporting my boards easier."

Clarke hopped in and waited for Lexa to shut the door before running her hand along the brand new looking interior. This was Clarke's dream car; she wouldn't tell Lexa that though. "Boards?"

Lexa shut her door before meeting Clarke's amazingly cute confused stare. "I surf a lot in the holidays, and when I have any free time." Clarke looked slightly shocked by the confession, but really she was just trying to hide the fact her mind was now picturing Lexa clad in a skimpy bikini whilst riding a wave.

"I grew up next to the ocean and my mother had a skateboard and surf shop so I was pretty lucky to be taught by her." Lexa tried to reason, feeling like she needed to offer Clarke some kind of explanation by the look on her face.

"Oh that's um," Hot, impressive, sexy, cute, amazing? "interesting." Clarke winced at her word choice, mentally chastising herself for voicing it.

Lexa was fiddling with the wheel, her palms now sweaty at the thought that maybe Clarke wasn't into surfers. She quickly moved to turn on her music in hopes to distract Clarke momentarily from her dorkyness only to be hit by the blaring sound of Ashley Tisdale's 'He said She said'.

"I didn't picture you for the Disney type of gal Lexa." Clarke was chewing her lip as she tried to bite back the laughter, failing miserably as it loudly escaped her mouth.

Lexa quickly hit shuffle; thankfully this time her ears were met by the sounds of PVRIS. "Oooh so you're the moody rock chick who secretly loves Disney?"

Lexa turned the key in the ignition before proudly nodding her head. "It is no secret Clarke, Ashley holds a place in my heart possibly no other woman ever will."

Clarke feigned an extreme sense of hurt before the two both broke out into a fit of giggles as Lexa drove away.

Whilst Lexa's eyes remained on the road, Clarke took it upon herself to flick through Lexa's music on her phone smiling as the occasional embarrassing album came up. She bit her lip in apprehension as she pressed play on a song titled 'I Get Off' knowing all to well what lyrics were about to fill the car.

Lexa smiled first as the electric guitar filled the car, her expression quickly falling as the singing began. "Clarke you should chose another song, this one is a bit-"

Lexa stopped at the lights before moving her eyes to meet Clarke; who now had a very sexy, smug look on her face as she gently banged her head along to the rhythm before turning to face Lexa and loudly belting the chorus. "I get off on you, getting off on me, give you what you want... but nothing is for free! It's a give and take, kind of love we make, when the line is crossed, I get off, I get off!"

Lexa's mouth hung open as she watched in awe as Clarke sung along effortlessly, whilst keeping the smug look on her face. Lexa didn't know what the hell she was enjoying the most; the fact Clarke knew this band and THIS SONG, the fact she had the most beautiful voice Lexa thought she had ever heard, or the fact that Clarke was singing these very dirty lyrics whilst maintaining full eye contact with her, and suddenly she was very aware of the fact there was an intense heat between her legs AND CARS WERE HONKING. My God get it together Lexa.

Lexa snapped her head round quickly moving the car forward before she held anyone up for any longer, annoyed at the fact she seriously needed to cross her legs to try and relieve the ache between her legs, but knowing whilst driving; this wouldn't be possible. Clarke quickly switched the song to something that wouldn't distract the clearly flustered girl then broke out into a fit of laughter as Lexa pulled into the parking lot of the restaurant, shaking her head at the blonde.

"How do you even know that song?" Lexa tried not to focus on the scene of Clarke singing, that was now stuck on loop in her mind.

"I like rock music, Lexa, there's a lot of things you don't know about me." Clarke grinned as Lexa shuffled her thighs against one another; trying to dismiss the intense feelings within her.

"But your voice Clarke, it's amazing and now I can never sing in front of you, like, ever."

Clarke dropped her head, blushing slightly at the compliment. "I bet your voice is beautiful Lexa." She fiddled with her hands before looking up to see the brunette holding her door open.

"After you."

Clarke was now beaming like a fool as she took Lexa's hand and hopped down, out of the car. "How very chivalrous of you."

Lexa grinned back before offering for Clarke to take her arm, then walking into the establishment.

Clarke let out a slight gasp as she looked around, and suddenly felt very under-dressed. The restaurant was simple but extremely elegant, with beautiful oak furnishings and counter tops, lined with steel that somehow integrated itself into the woodwork. The restaurant was extremely full and everyone dining seemed to be in suits and beautiful dresses.

"Lexa!" A large bearded man threw a towel over his shoulder before coming out of the open kitchen at the back of the restaurant.

The brunette took the forearm of the man in a handshake type grasp, before being pulled in for a huge bear hug; Lexa looking slightly lost for breath as she reappeared from it. "Hey Gustus."

Gustus raised his brows at Lexa as he looked to Clarke then quickly back to her; trying to silently question her as to whether or not Clarke was more than a friend. Lexa forced a grin and subtlety nodded her head. "Gustus this is Clarke, Clarke , my uncle Gustus."

Clarke smiled as she greeted the man apprehensively, worrying she may not be able to go that long without breath if he brought her in for such an embrace. Instead, Gustus held out a hand, lightly shaking Clarke's when she met his grip.

Lexa let out a loud exhale at this; clearly relieved too that her Uncle had shown some restraint in his greeting. "Your table is as requested, let me know if you need anything, the waiter shall be over shortly." Lexa followed behind Clarke leading her with a hand on her back, quickly whipping her head around to mouth a 'thank you' to her uncle.

Lexa stopped short of what Clarke believed to be the nicest table of all; situated in the corner and dimly lit, looking out onto a beautiful view of the sunset through the large glass wall. Lexa pulled out a chair and waited for Clarke to take her seat before moving to sit across from her.

"This place is beautiful Lexa." Clarke pulled her eyes from the view to admire the equally amazing one sat before her.

"I'm sorry to throw my family at you on our first date, but the food here is great and I wanted to take you somewhere nice." Lexa reached forward taking Clarke's hand in her own.

"I love it. Your uncle seems to be a lovely guy Lexa, I am honored you'd let me meet him." Clarke grinned at the girl and took a sip on her water.

"What can I get you both?"

A very handsome man appeared; he looked to be around the same age as them, dressed in back trousers, a white shirt and small black apron. His eyes were set firmly on Clarke and it made Lexa wriggle slightly in her seat. "I'll have a beer." Lexa's voice was cold, and when his eyes remained on Clarke, her grasp anxiously tightened on her hand.

Clarke noted this and quickly squeezed Lexa's hand, looking at her with a reassuring, longing gaze. "Make that two." Clarke made a point of bringing Lexa's hand to her mouth and kissing it before the guy turned to walk off.

Clarke chuckled lightly as the fiery jealously in Lexa's eyes and gently ran her foot along the girls thigh under the table before leaning in close to her. "You are the only one I want Lexa."

Lexa dragged her eyes from the waiter, shivering at Clarke's touch before crossing her legs in hopes to relieve the sensation that was becoming all to common when around Clarke. She blushed slightly when she saw the blonde grinning, realizing her scorning of the waiter had not gone unnoticed. "Sorry I just-"

Clarke picked up a menu to change the topic, trying to distract the girl from the fact the waiter was still staring. "So what would you recommend?"

Lexa smiled and pointed to the black bean burger with side salad.

Clarke liked the idea of this. "Are you vegetarian?"

Lexa chuckled. "No I consume way more bacon then one should be proud of, but Gustus is, and he makes vegetarian food that is to die for."

Clarke laughed at Lexa's choice of words before closing the menu. "Burger it is."

Lexa passed the menu back to Clarke. "You need to decide on a starter too."

Clarke waved the menu off. "I trust your judgment."

Lexa grinned this time as the waiter appeared with their drinks. "Have you decided what you would like to eat."

She ignored the fact the waiter was still eyeing up her date as Clarke was once again trailing her foot along her thigh with a smug look on her face. "We will both have the Three-cheese soufflés for starters, then the black bean burgers with the side salad as mains."

The waiter quickly wrote down the order before heading off. Lexa grinned at her date who was nodding in approval of the order. "That does sound good." Clarke's eyes were wide at the thought of the food; she hadn't even eaten lunch as she was so nervous about the date, so the food couldn't come soon enough.

The starter came not too soon after they ordered and Lexa tried to hold back the longing she felt to take Clarke into the bathroom and kiss her, upon hearing the girl moan when the soufflé hit her pallet. Clarke however, flushed pink when she noticed it was her who made the noise, and tried to bury her embarrassment as she put the food in her mouth. "Lexa this is amazing."

Lexa bit her lip as she admired the adorable girl before her, the tinge of rose in her cheeks adding yet more to her beauty. "Gustus will be pleased to know."

Lexa ate her starter, not talking again until they both finished as Lexa had too skipped lunch from the nausea the prospect of the date brought forth.

"So you're an art major I would presume?"

Clarke nodded and took a sip of her beer. "Mmmhmm."

"So I take it your parents are in creative lines of work also?"

The blonde almost spat out her drink at the idea of her mother being in a creative line of work- the image of Abi bearing an electric guitar came to mind. "Uh no. My mother is a doctor, she was less than impressed at my choice to study art... You know, kind of had it in mind I would go into med studies or at least something to do with medical science."

Lexa raised her brow upon hearing the description, suddenly becoming nervous of the thought of if she ever had to meet this woman. "And your father?"

Clarke's expression turned cold and she began to fumble with her glass. It was an expression she had never seen on the girl, and it was taking every bit of will power Lexa had not to embrace her. "My father died when I was young." Clarke swallowed biting back the tears that brimmed in her eyes. Though it had been a while since her fathers passing the emotion was still raw and something she struggled to deal with. "Sorry is there a restroom?"

Shaking her head to remember, Lexa pointed behind Clarke. "Just down that hall on the right."

Clarke forced a smile before hurriedly walking to the restroom, shutting the door behind her as she felt the tears escape her eyes. "Get it together dammit." Clarke looked at her reflection and took in a deep jagged breath as she wiped her eyes, trying to clean the mascara that covered them.

"Clarke are you okay?" Lexa's voice sounded from behind the door and Clarke cringed not wanting Lexa to see her like this.

"I'm fine, I'll be out in a minute." Clarke's voice cracked slightly in the reply and she winced, knowing Lexa would have heard.

"Clarke." Lexa's voice was almost a plea as she rested her temple against the door.

Clarke did her best to wipe away the mascara before opening the door. "I'm fine."

The blonde went to exit the room but Lexa pulled her back in locking the door behind them. "You're not." She moved to brush one of the gold locks away from the girls face.

The caress was the only thing Clarke needed to bring the tears back out and they flowed slowly down her cheek as she lent into the girls shoulder; Lexa holding her tightly with her fingers tangled in the blonde hair. "It's okay." She whispered against Clarke's ear as she felt her shudder in her embrace.

"It's been so long but I don't think I'll ever be able to talk about it. I'm so sorry. I'm totally ruining our date."

Lexa simply kissed the girls hair and shushed her as she rocked her gently. "You are not. The emotion of loss is not something to be sorry for Clarke. I understand."

Clarke looked to Lexa when she heard the tone of her last two words; they were tinged with sadness as too were her eyes. "Who was it?" Lexa simply furrowed her brow at the question, not knowing what Clarke meant. "That you lost?" Clarke clarified.

Lexa's jaw tensed considerably as she swallowed the lump that had risen in her throat. "My brother, Nyko." Lexa's eyes glazed over too but she fought back the tears; Lexa was not one to cry in front of people. At least that was until Clarke's hands cradled her cheeks, and for the first time she let the sadness consume her in the presence of another.

 

Chapter Text

Clarke held Lexa tight as the sobs escaped her; though her head rested upon her chest she somehow still felt as though she was not close enough to the girl. "Do you want to go home Lexa? I can get the tab I'll just clean up my makeup."

Lexa lent back slightly and Clarke had to resist the overwhelming urge to reach out and pull her right back into her embrace upon seeing Lexa's blackened face from where her eyeliner and mascara had pooled and dripped. Lexa somehow pulled off the look that bared resemblance to a raccoon.

The brunette wiped the girl's eyes with the back of her hands and quickly shook her head. "No Clarke, it's fine I have an idea. Wait here."

Lexa turned to open the door but Clarke pulled her back, turning the tap on then using her thumbs to remove the make up from the girls face. "There, much better." She smiled reassuringly at Lexa, watching her turn and leave the restroom with her makeup slightly more intact.

Ten minutes later Clarke was beginning to worry. She was still sat in the restroom as she assumed Lexa was going to return to her, but now she was slightly anxious that perhaps Lexa had left. Worse than that she was going to have to walk back into a room full of people who have probably noticed she has been occupying the toilet for a total of fifteen minutes. She moved her hand forward, placing it on the handle as she toyed with her exit strategy. Holding her breath, she moved the handle down, swinging the door open to reveal Lexa stood holding a tray with numerous plates on.

"Hey, sorry, I was just trying to figure out how to open the door without dropping the food..." Lexa nodded to the tray in front of her and blushed slightly at the weird, trying to hold a tray on her knee whilst simultaneously balancing it in her hand and attempting to open a door position she had been caught in.

"Oh thank God." Clarke stepped out of the bathroom and shut the door behind her. "I thought you had ditched me because I'm such a horrific date. I was trying to figure out how to exit the restaurant without people staring at me funny for taking so long in the bathroom and-"

"Clarke, it's okay. And, as I have mentioned before; I will never abandon you. No matter how much you make me cry." Lexa chuckled as Clarke feigned a hurt face whilst moving her hands to cover her heart.

"So where are you taking the plates, I don't think it's all that hygienic to eat in a restroom." Clarke let out a grin as her date rolled her eyes.

"Follow me." Lexa moved to continue down the long hallway turning right once they got to the end. They followed it down until they arrived at a black door. "Can you punch in the code? It's 1406 ."

Clarke pushed the numbers and opened the door, holding it as she waited for Lexa to climb the staircase in front of them. It was dimly lit and the one functioning bulb was flickering as they walked up. "You're not gonna kill me are you? Because Octavia knows where I am. She knows I was with you Lexa. She will come for you."

Lexa chuckled and stopped at the door in front of them. "Clarke you are safe. To be honest I think I'll probably have nightmares about returning you home too late. I know how protective Octavia is of you." Lexa beamed at the girl. "Can you get my key, its in my back pocket."

Clarke's face began to burn as she searched Lexa's outfit for pockets only to land on the tight black pants. "Um... Sure." She reached toward Lexa, closing her eyes and biting her lips together as she inserted her hand delicately into the pocket, trying to ignore the feeling of Lexa's extremely toned ass as she fumbled for the keys.

"If I didn't know better I'd think you were taking advantage of this Clarke." Lexa grinned as she felt Clarke's hand go rigid in her pocket before quickly removing the keys.

The blonde's face was now bright red and suddenly she was extremely pleased that Lexa's back was still turned. However, she was now irritated her date had managed to embarrass her and she wasn't about to go down without a fight. Clarke fumbled with the keys for a bit; gathering confidence before she slipped her hand back in the pocket and moved her body so that her chest was resting against the brunet back, her mouth against her ear. "Maybe I was. But then again... If I didn't know better I'd say you conveniently needing me to reach into said pocket to get the keys was part of you plan all along." Clarke gently squeezed Lexa's ass cheek before removing her hand from the pocket; smiling as she heard Lexa's breathing becoming extremely erratic. "I'll just get that for you."

Lexa's heart was now beating harder than she thought possible, it only took Clarke's brushing against her- even closer now- to open the door, to make it halter; her breath caught in her chest until the door swung open and the blonde moved back. "Thank you Clarke." Lexa cringed as she stepped through the door, hearing her voice- though low and controlled- cracking mid sentence.

Clarke kissed her on the cheek, grinning at the fact she had clearly won this one. "Anytime." She shut the door and watched as Lexa put the tray on a steel counter in a beautifully furnished kitchen; the cupboards and island were wooden with the steel working its way into it in vine like spirals, similar to the restaurant's. "Where are we?"

Clarke's jaw dropped slightly as she looked around the amazingly open apartment; there was a large living room with black leather sofas and an entertainment system to die for, and oak flooring across the entire apartment floor. On her left were two doors which she assumed led to the bedroom and bathroom.

Lexa chuckled at the girl's reaction and removed the plates from the tray; seating them on the island with some cutlery before moving to the fridge to pull out a bottle of champagne and two flute glasses. "This is my apartment."

Clarke's jaw somehow slackened further as she spun on her heels to look at the girl, assuming Lexa's face would give away the sarcasm her voice had failed to hint at. "Seriously?" She narrowed her eyes skeptically, scrutinizing the girl before her.

"Yes, seriously." Lexa poured the champagne before taking a seat on one of the black bar stools then motioning for Clarke to do the same.

"How?" Clarke's voice was one of amazement as she took a seat then continued to look around; her eyes now appreciating the exposed brickwork of the loft style apartment.

Lexa pulled out a fork and played with her food. "Uncle Gustus owns the entire building. I spent a lot of time cooking with him when I came here on holiday with my parents, so he always had this place for me. Then when I Moved here to attend college he gave me a key and said the place was mine, you know... In case I ever fell out with my roommate or just wanted some space." She began to eat her food, trying not to choke on it while she held back the laughter that brimmed to her mouth whilst watching Clarke's wide eyed gaze.

"So you have a sex pad?" Clarke's lips pulled up in a sultry smile before she began to dig into her own food. The brunette coughed loudly, trying to dislodge the piece of burger that had made its way into her airway. "Relax Lex, I'm joking." Clarke mumbled between bites, her eyes sparkling at the look on her date's face.

Lexa could feel the blush creeping up her neck as Clarke's eyes remained firmly on hers. When she finally spoke, Lexa was able to breath again. "So I'm sorry for totally ruining our first date... I don't normally spend my time crying in public bathrooms I swear."

Lexa moved her hand to cover her date's; squeezing it reassuringly. "It's fine Clarke. To be honest I have never seen someone remain that beautiful when there face is red and teary but somehow you pulled it off." Clarke grinned at this; she was sure Lexa was just trying to make her feel better, but it was definitely working.

"You're beautiful when you cry also. Though I'd prefer not to make you do so on our next date." Clarke smiled at the thought of Lexa's glassy eyes. Though it made her sad to think of Lexa in such a way, she was still the most perfect thing she had seen on earth; her wide, watery eyes just somehow made her more so.

Lexa began tracing circles mindlessly with her thumb on the back of her date's hand. "I don't normally do that either. I don't tend to cry in front of others often... Ever really. I remember crying at my brothers funeral, then I remember my mother taking me out back and looking me in the eye when she told me how 'love is weakness'. After that I made sure I didn't cry in front of others, I barely allowed myself to feel when alone." Lexa stared at their entangled hands as she spoke, her mind deep in concentration as she remembered the cold air of that day.

"Lexa, Lex," Clarke ran her hand through the girls curls, wanting her to come out of the dark place where she seemed to have gone. Lexa's eyes met hers; they were lifeless at first so Clarke ran her hand along the girl's face; cradling her cheek and smiling slightly as the life returned to them. "Love is not weakness. Love is strength. It's courage to feel even if it's just for those few moments of happiness, lust or even sadness. But please Lexa, don't for a second more believe that it is weakness."

Lexa nodded within the girls grasp and let her eyes fall to the blonde's lips. They were full and pink and she wanted so badly to meld them against her own. Clarke's held her breath as she noted this; letting her own eyes drop to view the bow of Lexa's top lip. She lent in slowly; giving Lexa time to pull away if she wished. Relief washed over Clarke when her date simply entangled her hand in her blonde locks to pull her in; taking her bottom lip between her own.

Clarke quickly deepened the kiss. She didn't know if was the sadness she felt from earlier, the grief... But she didn't care, she needed Lexa to be as close to her as humanly possible and she never wanted to let her go.

Lexa felt the girl's hands move beneath her shirt to trace the warm flesh of her waist beneath. She smiled into the kiss, enjoying the burning that Clarke's fingertips brought as she moved to bite her lip in passion.

It was only a gentle nibble, but Clarke instinctively let out a loud moan of pleasure. Lexa's lips were crushing hers; bruising them, and it was heaven. Suddenly Lexa pulled away and rested her temple against Clarke's; the sound of their jagged breathing filling the air. "Is everything okay?" Clarke searched Lexa's eyes, hoping she hadn't pushed her when she was still trying to get over the events of earlier on in their date.

"No, no Clarke, it's fine." Lexa kissed her forehead then moved to slide her fingers through the gold hair before her. "It's just, with you moaning..." Clarke's cheeks began to burn and she hurriedly averted her gaze to the floor in attempt to hide it. Lexa tilted the girls chin back up, grinning at her adorable embarrassment as she coursed a thumb over her jawline. "Don't be embarrassed by it Clarke, it was really, amazingly hot," Lexa's cheeks were now tinged with pink as she dropped her gaze to her feet. "which is why I stopped..." Clarke furrowed her brows in confusion; Lexa sighed at the reaction before proceeding. "Because if I hadn't and you had of made that sound again... I don't think I would have been able to restrain myself." Clarke brow was still low, her eyes like a sweet puppy. Lexa huffed again. "Clarke, if I hadn't of stopped I would have wanted even more than I do now to have sex with you."

The blondes eyes opened wide. "Oh, I see." She bit her lip, considering what to say next. "I mean I wouldn't be opposed to the idea..." Lexa's pupils dilated as her mind went exactly where she'd been trying to keep it from. "But I think we should go on a few more dates first or I'll never hear the end of it from O." Clarke chuckled at the thought and Lexa joined in; realizing Clarke's reason was a very good one.

"Perhaps we should then." Lexa grinned before pulling Clarke in for a quick kiss. "So movie night? There's clothing in my room if you want to stay over, I can sleep on the couch."

Clarke forced a smile trying to hide her anxiety. Though she wanted to stay over, she didn't want to take Lexa's bed and sentence her to the couch. Clarke swallowed. She could offer to take the couch, but Lexa would no doubt refuse this. Or... she could offer to share the bed. They had shared a bed before after all (even if they were both completely intoxicated at the time). But would she think this was too forward? Hell, it was going to happen sooner or later anyhow. "Sure, but we can share the bed if you want; there's no way I'm kicking you out of your own bed, and yeah could I borrow some sweatpants and a t-shirt?"

Lexa grinned at the invitation and pulled Clarke towards her room. The blonde- not wanting to invade her space- waited outside the door while Lexa fumbled around, sneakily peeking in to take in the details whilst she did; gasping slightly as she looked at the king bed and oak furnishings. The thing that took Clarke's eye though was the collection of surf boards and skateboards; the decks were decorated beautifully with styles from pen and ink candy skulls to acrylic scenic pieces and Clarke felt inspired just looking at them.

"Here I think these should fit." Lexa tossed the clothing to her date. "You're welcome to get changed in here, I'll go set up Netflix and make some popcorn." She smiled warmly before turning to go prepare the snack.

Clarke walked into the bedroom and shut the door, groaning as she remembered her predicament before opening it once again. "Lex, could you unzip me?" She smiled weakly; Clarke hated not being able to do things, even something as small as this would bug her endlessly.

Lexa walked to her side and carefully tugged it down, averting her gaze as she did so; though her brain helpfully filled in the blanks, reminding her of the lovely lace number Clarke was wearing that she had spotted when doing it up. Lexa felt the warmth growing between her legs at the thought and cleared her throat. "I should go make sure the popcorn doesn't burn."

Clarke thanked her as she walked back in the room; closing the door behind her. She quickly pulled down the dress and hummed as she stepped into the comfy clothing; smelling Lexa's intoxicating scent on them. She could definitely get used to this. Clark tried to formulate a plan as to how she could sneak the top home with her and that way keep the scent near at all times, but shook her head and folded her dress to distract herself; that was a tad too weird... Even for her.

Clarke lay the folded dress and shoes on the end of the bed then put on the woolly socks her date had left out before heading back into the other room to find Lexa on the couch.

"Hey so what movie or show do you wanna watch?" Lexa was yet to take her eyes off the screen; flitting through the numerous motion pictures.

"Have a look on the gay and lesbian section, there's gotta be one bearable film on there."

Lexa chuckled. "Hmm, Anya refuses to let me watch anymore on there after the last two resulted in some spontaneous musical numbers that were somewhat unbearable."

Clarke laughed as she remembered watching the films herself. "I know how she feels."

"How about Imagine Me & You?" Lexa grinned at her own suggestion.

"Never seen it."

Lexa immediately hit play then turned to Clarke in shock, her breath hitching as she finally took in the sight that was her date in her own sweats and top. Lexa forced herself to blink and concentrate then replied a good thirty seconds later. "You've never seen," Lexa cupped her hands around her mouth. "You're a wanker number nine!"

Clarke burst into a fit of laughter and Lexa couldn't help but join in. "No! What the hell was that?"

Lexa patted the girls leg, then pulled her into her side so that Clarke's head rested upon her shoulder. "All in good time Clarke, all in good time."

 

 

Chapter Text

Clarke's eyes were blurry as she stirred; the light from Lexa's bedroom window beamed through the curtains, partially blinding her. She turned where she lay, taking in a deep breath when she ended up inches from Lexa's face. The girls arm was wrapped tightly around her waist; making Clarke grin like a fool. "Morning." Clarke mumbled against the brunettes ear.

"Just another hour, pleaseeee." Lexa groaned before her eyes fluttered open; remembering she had fallen asleep next to Clarke. Her cheeks flooded pink as she suddenly became very aware of the fact her arm was wrapped around the girls waist, her palm resting gently against her ass. "Shit, sorry." Lexa ripped her arm from the girls side and sat up in the bed, cringing as she tried to figure how long Clarke had been awake for and what embarrassing sleep induced behaviors she had witnessed in that time.

Clarke propped herself up on her elbow and chuckled lightly taking note of the girls crinkled face. "I only just woke up; don't worry. I didn't see you snoring or anything so you're fine."

Lexa exhales with relief before slumping down beside Clarke. "Promise?"

Clarke takes the brunette's bottom lip between her own; humming slightly as she does. "Promise."

A loud cough filled the air and they both shot worried gazes towards the bedroom door. "Wow, I guess it is true what they say... Do I need to grab a U-Haul or are you guys-"

Lexa sat upright and violently threw a pillow at Anya's face. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"Rude." Anya moved the hair out of her face before walking to sit on the end of the bed, making herself right at home. "And, because you asked so very kindly, I phoned Gustus when you didn't come back to our room and he said you looked like you were crying and that you had gone to your apartment with a load of food. He did not however, mention that you had brought Clarke with you." Anya smiled at the very red faced blonde sat before her. Clarke smiled shyly and pulled the covers up; even though she was in Lexa's pajamas she felt very exposed.

"I'm fine," Lexa moved her hand to squeeze Clarke's thigh underneath the covers. "we're fine." She added, smiling reassuringly at the girl next to her.

Anya rolled her eyes as she knew Lexa was lying; she had never seen her cry during the entire time they had known one another but she'd bring it up again later when Clarke was not present. "So Clarke is Lexa any good in bed?"

Lexa choked on air, grasping at her chest as she attempted to get her breathing under control. Clarke simply watched on; her eyes huge as she stared at Lexa's roommate. "I uh, I wouldn't know."

"We didn't sleep together Anya! Clarke just slept over because we were up watching movies till late." She turned to look at Clarke. "I'm so sorry my TOTAL BITCH of a roommate is JUMPING, to conclusions." Glares were shot in Anya's direction each time the girl raised her voice.

"Hey calm it asshole! I'm just making polite conversation, but now I shall be leaving for my date."

Lexa raised her eyebrow at the mention of this; Anya rarely dated, she was more of a find a girl or guy at a bar for a one night stand type of person. "A date? You? With who?" Lexa's voice was low as she eyed up her roommate curiously. Anya was wearing black leather trousers with a white tank top and had her hair down but had straightened the usually wavy mane. Her make up- as always- was entirely on point, with her signature, perfectly winged eyeliner decorating her lids.

Anya's tough girl facade broke for a second as a smile pulled at the corner of her mouth. She quickly moved her gaze to the floor to hide it before her face returned to her normally stoic expression. "Raven is taking me out for drinks and bowling."

Clarke's brows raised and both of the girls jaws dropped open. Lexa quickly shook her head attempting to dismiss the humorous image of Anya bowling. "You hate bowling Anya. You told me it was created by the devil if I remember correctly, and then slid over on the floor after refusing to wearing the bowling shoes and deciding your socks were a good alternative."

The blonde sputtered on the water she was sipping as the image popped up in her mind. Anya immediately shot her a death glare before focusing it upon Lexa once more. "It is created by the devil Lexa and Raven said she has a pair that will fit me so the skanky communal ones will not be a problem." She deepened her glare at the girl who sat before her.

"Woah... already borrowing the girls clothing and you haven't even been on your first date? Did you get around to getting that U-Haul because I'm sure we could spare it for your use."

Anya gritted her teeth before turning her attention to Clarke and forcing a smile on her face. "Clarke, we should all get a coffee tomorrow so I can tell you about all of Lexa's wonderful habits she's yet to reveal to you."

Lexa's smug grin dropped off of her face; a narrowed gaze forming in its place. "Clarke you don't have to-"

Clarke was beginning to sweat slightly under the pressure. She knew she should say no, Anya seemed nice but in all truths she scared her shitless; she was much taller than Clarke and the girl could easily take her if things went badly, she looked like she would fight dirty. She looks like a hair puller. Clarke thought to herself. "Sureeeee?" Clarke's voice was high pitched as she forced a smile that ended up coming across as more of a grimace.

"Great, I'll text Lexa with the details. See you both soon." She moved to shut the door before peering her head back through. "Next time you wanna have a 'movie night' if you could text me to let me know that you're alive, that way I don't have to raid your door mat for your oh so well hidden key dumb ass. Seriously. Move that shit. What if I was a thief." Anya rolled her eyes at Lexa's scoff as she closed the bedroom door before leaving the apartment.

Lexa pushed Clarke's shoulder. "Why did you say yes? She's going to torment us Clarke. Channel your inner Katniss, Clarke. Fight the power." Lexa raised three fingers in a mockingjay salute. Before bursting out in a fit of laughter.

Clarke giggled at the dork that sat doubled over in front of her. "I would not survive the hunger games Lexa. Some bitch would be like 'hey want some berries?' and I'd be like 'SURE THING, THANKS, LET ME JUST GO RIGHT AHEAD AND EAT THESE DEFINATELY POSINOUS GOODS' because I'm just too fucking polite and anxious to just say 'no I don't want your fucking berry death'."

Lexa wrapped an arm around Clarke before planting a kiss on her cheek. "Anya doesn't use berries, she prefers knives."

Clarke scowled at the brunette, throwing her hands to her face and groaning as she fell back in defeat.


Clarke spent the rest of the day shopping. She knew Octavia had probably consumed the last of their groceries so she needed to stock up. After that she spent hours pondering the clothing shops,trying to get up the courage to walk into a lingerie store on her own. It took a while but in the end she finally bit the bullet; deciding dealing with hot women judging her underwear choices was probably a better alternative to having Lexa see her in her days of the week panties again. She only spent ten minutes in the shop; grabbing a few matching black, blue and pastel green sets that were a little more sexier than she was used to. After walking out of the shop she felt a sense of achievement staring down at the bags of underwear.


She moved to unlock the door, deciding she would put the shopping away before Octavia got home and started prying through it to see what she could consume before Clarke. Her eyes widened though as she pushed it open to see Raven and Octavia sat watching television.

"Ohhhhh you got food!" Octavia took the bags from Clarke's hands and began rummaging for the good stuff. "Did you get potatoes? WHERE ARE THE POTATOES CLARKE? You know how I fee about them."

Clarke rolled her eyes at her overly dramatic friend. "Yes I got potatoes you freak."

Octavia beamed before beginning her rummaging for the other good stuff. Her eyes grew large as she set her hand on a two piece black lace number, pulling it from the bag as her jaw dropped. "I take it things are going well with Lexa?"

Clarke was busy sorting the cereal cupboard as she replied. "Yeah, the date went really well, I think I really li-" She turned from the cupboard to see Octavia holding one of the lace lingerie sets in the air; Octavia and Raven's moths ajar as they examined it. "Oh my God O put it down now!" Clarke ran to tackle her roommate, Octavia squealing as she pinned her to the ground.

Raven knelt on the floor and began rummaging before pulling out the pastel set. "No way!" Octavia gasped. Clarke whirled her head; keeping her weight on Octavia as she glared at the brunette.

"Oh my God! What the fuck you guys! Stop it!" Clarke yanked the skimpy clothing from their hands before grabbing the bags to move them in her room. She strode back out with a pink blush now covering her cheeks.

"Woah, what else was in the bag Griffin? Did you go to that sex shop on that street by-"

Clarke groaned. "No, I do not own any sex toys Raven!"

Octavia sat up and cocked her head to the side. "There's a sex shop near campus? Do they sell those-"

Clarke pushed Octavia over before moving to sit by her. "Should I have sex toys? Do you think Lexa does? Oh my God what if shes used them before and knows I have no clue what the hell I'm doing?"

The two girls burst out laughing; Octavia's snorts filling the room. "Don't worry about it." Raven patted the girls leg as she tried to stop chuckling. "If she has then she's not going to presume that you have, and honestly I haven't been with many girls that will just whip them out on the first night, so relax, it'll be fine."

The blonde sighed before widening her eyes again. "Oh my go how do I even put on one of those harness things? What if she wants me to and I can't get it on? WHAT IF I FALL OVER WHEN IM TRYING TO GET IT ON RAVEN?"

Clarke's breathing was now erratic and her two friends moved to either side of her to embrace the panic ridden girl. "It's not that hard, I doubt she'd spring something like that on you but I can show you how to get it on tomorrow if that will make you stop freaking the fuck out."

She nodded at Ravens offer. "Thank you, thank you, thank you! I love you." Clarke lent her head against Raven's shoulder before moving her eyes to Octavia who was heading over to her bedroom. "O what are you doing?"

Loud noises of things clattering and creaks of draws and cupboard doors opening filled the air before the raven haired girl reappeared; a small black nylon strap on dangling from her fingers as she waved it victoriously in the air. "How about we show you tonight?"

"Where the hell did you get that from O?"

The two girls stared on with their jaws slack from shock. "Since when do you do the lady folk?" Raven raised a brow flirtatiously before they both broke out into a fit of laughter.

"One of my friends got it for me as a joke, as a going to college present. She figured if I ever wanted to experiment with girls I may as well have the option of using one of these."

Octavia dropped it into Clarke's lap, grinning as her friend picked it up cautiously; examining it as if it were contaminated by radiation. "It's not going to bite you Clarke."

"Yeah but Lexa may..." Raven grinned as Clarke narrowed her eyes at the pair before returning her gaze to the strap on.

"Why did you bring it here though? Did you honestly think you were going to use it?" Clarke chucked the thing at Raven.

"I actually brought it so it was here in case you ever needed it..." Octavia moved her gaze to the ceiling as she spoke.

"WHAT?" The two girls questioned instantly, both looking as equally perplexed as the other.

Octavia moved her gaze down to the pair before sighing and shrugging her shoulders. "I may or may not have assumed you might have been into girls since we were like 15."

Raven giggled but Clarke let her jaw drop. "How?"

"Do you remember how many times you made me watch twilight so you could get 'fashion ideas' from Bella?" Clarke bit her lips and moved her gaze to the side. "And then when we did you would always comment on how hot she looked in every other scene?"

The brunette raised a hand to silence her. "Kristen Stewart is a gift to this earth O."

Octavia rolled her eyes. "Duh, I was not debating that Reyes. What I mean is Clarke; you've been pointing out how hot girls are in every movie we watched since. More eagerly than someone who was straight would have..."

Pursing her lips Clarke nodded gently as she let her brain run through the numerous memories of 'girl crushes' she had had over the years. "Fine. I may see your point."

Octavia grinned before running into her room to grab a box then placing it in Clarke's hands when she returned. "Early birthday gift."

The blonde narrowed her eyes in apprehension as she pulled the lid off the box revealing a large array of sex toys in a variety of colors. Both girls mouths hung open as Raven climbed down to rummage through the extensive collection. "What the hell O? Do not try telling me your 'friend' gave you this lot as well."

Octavia beamed at them as she shook her head. "Um no. These I brought when I went to a store with Raven one time."

Her friend's eyes lit up at the memory. "Oh my God that's why you took so long in there! I thought you were just buying those glow in the dark condoms you said were stupid!"

Octavia suddenly tore the box from Clarke's hands before pulling out a small box and shoving it into her pocket; her cheeks now burning slightly. "Shut up! And I just got carried away. Everything was just so pretty..." Octavia picked up a class dildo with a marble effect ripple through it; her eyes moving across it as she appreciated its beauty. "I mean it's practically art."

Clarke scoffed as she tore the item from her friends hand; waving it in the air. "This is not art ."

Octavia stole it back before carefully placing it on the table beside her with a pout on her face. "You'll thank me someday soon."

The blonde rolled her eyes before picking up the strap on to examine it once more. "Why the hell are there so many holes?"

Raven helped Clarke to stand up; motioning for her to lift a leg before slipping it up and around then getting her to do the same with the next. "These two are leg holes. Then this goes around your waist." Raven pulled it up and began tightening the straps. "Then just use these to tighten or loosen the straps. Then just chose one of those," She motioned to some of the bits in the box. "to fit into the O ring."

She walked back a few steps to examine her handy work with Octavia who gave her a high five. "Nice work Reyes!"

Raven bowed her head at the compliment. Clarke fiddled with the straps a bit herself before nodding at her friends work. "Easier than I thought." She added.

Clarke was stood in the strap on grinning at her friends when a knock at the door wiped it clean off. "Fuck!" Octavia moved towards the door whilst Raven hurriedly removed the harness from her friend. "Hurry up!" Clarke squealed nervously as Octavia opened the door just wide enough to communicate with whoever was outside.

"Ohh, hello Abi!" Octavia loudly announced. The two girls shot each other a wide eyed look of pure fear. Of all the times Clarke's mother could have chosen to stop over in the past year, she had to of chosen this one.

 

Chapter Text

Raven ran the harness and box back into Octavia's room before joining her at the door. "Hey Momma G!" Raven shot her friend a quick 'all is well' smile before pulling the door open to reveal a slightly flustered Clarke.

"Hey mom." Clarke went to awkwardly hug her mother. Abigail was never one for embraces- and neither was Clarke- but somehow it always seemed necessary upon greeting one another so they both grimaced through the ordeals.

"Hey baby." Abigail let her daughter go before walking to drop some bags on the kitchen counter. "I got you some fruit and veg in case you have forgotten what they are." She poked at the numerous bags of chips that sat piled on the kitchen counter.

Octavia ran to scour through the bags, her eyes immediately lighting up when she found what she had hoped to. "Your mom got organic potatoes!" She pulled Abigail in for a tight squeeze before rubbing the bag of veg against her cheek. "Clarke I can practically smell the earth on them." She closed her eyes as she inhaled them once more.

"O you're such a freak." Clarke grabbed the potatoes off of her and put them on the side. "Do you want a coffee mum?" Abigail nodded and walked to take a seat on the couch, Octavia and Raven sitting down opposite to her.

"So how are your classes girls?" Abigail smiled at the two. She had known them since they were in diapers and saw them as extended family rather than just Clarke's friends.

Octavia groaned at the thought of education. "Some of my professors are major hard asses but it's going okay."

Raven nodded in agreement. "Yeah the mechanics teachers are pretty much the same, though some of them are alright. It's nice when you get professors that actually try and engage you instead of just rambling on about what you have already read five times over."

Abigail nodded and accepted the coffee that Clarke was holding out to her. The cup was scolding so she moved to place it on the table, her mouth dropping slightly at what she saw sat in front of her. The three girls followed Abigail's eye line before letting there jaws drop to at the sight of Octavia's marbled glass dildo that laid by Clarke's mothers coffee.

The girls stared at one another; their mouths still slack and eyes wide as they tried to communicate an escape plan non verbally through their panicked looks.

Octavia lent forward before picking the item up and placing it behind her back. "It's art." She added as she smiled nervously at Abigail who simply bit her lips together and nodded.

"I'm sure it is." Clarke's mother sat ridged in her seat, trying to divert her mind from remembering what she had just seen sat on her daughters table.

"So..." Raven finally took it upon herself to breach the silence, realizing her two friends were probably too paralyzed by shock to do it themselves. "How's work?" Her tone was a few octaves higher than usual as she feigned a smile in Abigail's direction.

Abigail quickly shook her head to dismiss the images still plaguing her mind before replying. "It's good; my boss has me working extra shifts at the moment so hopefully I'm in line for a promotion at the end of this year." She smiled at the brunette before setting her gaze upon her daughter. "How is your..." The smile completely disappeared from Abigail's face at the thought of her daughters chosen career goals. "art going."

Clarke tried in the beginning to fight the upset that came about whenever they discussed the topic, but at this point the disappointment was something that only led to her feeling a dull numbness course through her body. She had let go of the pain long ago. "It's going well." The blonde chewed her lip for a while. "I, um, Kane chose me to headline the college exhibition next week. I get an entire booth to myself. It's a pretty big deal, local gallery owners will be attending so it will get my name out there."

Octavia and Raven grinned proudly at their friend; trying to distract her from the fact her mother was yet to even attempt a smile. "Well, that is good to hear." Abigail added, her face hard as she spoke.

"You can come if you would like? I've been given a few guest tickets to give to close friends or relatives." Clarke absentmindedly played with the rim of her coffee mug as she spoke; avoiding any and all eye contact with her mother.

"Honey, I have to work. Things are crazy at the moment and I just will not have the time."

Clarke deflated slightly in her seat. She had been expecting this to be her response and couldn't help but feel angry at the pang of sadness that was making her stomach turn. If this had been an event for something to do with a medical course Abigail would have made the time- there was no question of this.

"I am here for tomorrow also though, I figured we could get coffee together. She motioned to the two girls beside her, I'd like to catch up with you girls as well if you're free?"

The girls shifted in their seat slightly. They had gotten on well with Abigail throughout high school but since Clarke's father passed and Clarke made her choice to study art, Abigail had been more opinionated than usual. Especially with how they had seen her treating Clarke. "We um, we were actually heading out for coffee with a few friends- Anya and Lexa- tomorrow." Raven reminded the pair whose eyes widened at the mention.

"Well I wouldn't mind meeting a few of your friends! It's nice to know Clarke isn't keeping herself cooped up in here watching TV in her spare time." Abigail sipped her coffee before standing. "If you text me the time and place tonight I'll meet you there tomorrow."

Clarke stuttered for a bit, trying to find an excuse, any excuse, to keep her mother as far away from this get together as possible. It wasn't just that Clarke wasn't ready for Lexa to meet her mom- even if it was under the facade as her 'friend'- it was that her mother was a raging Republican who had very strict views on how 'a man should be with a woman'. She rolled her eyes at the thought. When Raven had told Abigail of her bisexuality the woman led a thirty minute lecture on how she just needs to 'find the right man to make her see' before setting her up with a young male she knew (not that Raven minded in the end; Kyle was actually rather attractive).

It was Raven who broke the silence, feigning a smile. "Are you sure? We could meet you after? They're really more Octavia's friends from rugby than anything, they'll probably bore you with all the game talk."

Abigail quickly shook her head as she walked towards the door. "I'm sure it will be fine! I had better be off now though, I need to get some things sorted over the phone." She turned to take Clarke in for another highly awkward embrace. "I'll see you and your friends tomorrow." She smiled once more at the girls before leaving.

Clarke shut the door and let her body slump against it; falling to the ground, groaning when she knew her mother was far away enough not to hear. "I'm fucked. What the hell am I going to do? Guys I can never tell her I'm bi! I'm already enough of a disappointment to her..."

The two girls moved to sit down either side of her; leaning their heads on her shoulders in attempt to sooth the nervous wreck the blonde had become. "Maybe she's changed?" Octavia offered.

Clarke laughed at the thought. "I highly doubt that O."

The brunette sat forward; eye's lit with a plan. "How about I just make it clear to her that me and Anya are more than friends? Then we can see how she reacts to that?"

Clarke quickly dismissed the idea. "And if my mother gives you and Anya a hour long lecture on the importance of having a male partner?"

Raven rolled her eyes; this would probably be what happened. "Then I shall prepare Anya for it and we shall both sit through the ordeal until she gets her prejudice out of her system."

Clarke sighed. "I don't think I can see you sit through that. And I don't believe her prejudice will ever be out of her system."

Octavia suddenly caught up with the conversation , shuffling round to sit in front of the two girls. "You and Anya are more than friends?"

Clarke started laughing hysterically at just how red Raven's cheeks had turned. "Yeah, um-" Raven muttered between panicked breathes.

"Yeah when the hell did that happen? How was your time bowling by the way?"

Octavia suddenly slapped the brunettes shoulder with enough force to make her grunt. "You went bowling without me?"

Rubbing her shoulder, Raven sighed. "O, I think she would have found it a bit odd if I had brought my dorky friend along to our date."

Octavia pulled a shocked face before bursting out into a fit or snort filled laughter. "When did this start anyway?! What is it with you two and dating my teammates?"

The two girls scowled at her. "Well, we met when you made me play that damn game, which- by the way- I am never doing again. Then, when we came back for drinks here we started talking and it turns out we share a lot of the same interests. It was moving slowly and all but then Anya had to walk home on her own because SOMEBODY," Raven shot Clarke a devilish wink. "decided to sleep with her roommate."

Clarke gasped in annoyance. "We did not sleep together... Okay maybe we did. But it was literal sleeping okay."

"Well, that still meant Anya had to walk home alone so I offered to walk her myself. Anyway, when we got back to hers she invited me in for food because we were both pretty drunk, then she felt bad I was going to have to walk back on my own and offered to let me stay over. After a couple glasses of wine and some damn good pasta- Anya's apparently a goddess in the kitchen, even when drunk- we ended up kind of sleeping together. Both in the literal sense and the other sense."

The two girls gaped at her as she spoke. "And then you took her bowling...?" Clarke dragged out the last word as she narrowed her eyes in confusion; trying to figure out her friend.

"She mentioned she didn't like it and I said that's because she never had me to teach her." 'Awwhhs' sounded from the two girls who were now looking at her, pouting with puppy dog eyes. "Oh shut up. Anyway, I had a really good time, I dunno, I really like her."

Octavia and Clarke's mouths hung open in shock. "You, 'I only spend one night with a person' Reyes, went on an actual date and ENJOYED IT? Practically a second date may I add." Clarke let a smile crawl over her face as Raven quickly stood up in attempt to hide her blush.

Octavia grinned. "I can't wait to watch you drooling over her at coffee tomorrow." Raven narrowed her eyes immediately. "I'm gonna be a total third... no, fifth wheel aren't I?"

Raven scoffed at the thought. "No, Abi's gonna be there too so I think you'll be fine."

Octavia wiggled her brows at the pair. "I mean normally I'm not one for older women... or women... but for Momma G..."

Clarke rolled her eyes before pushing her friend over. "You disgust me."

The three girls moved back over to the couch to sit down, Octavia muttering a 'fuck' when she sat on a pointy object, pulling out the sex toy from beneath her. "Oh my God I totally forgot about that."

Clarke threw her hands to her face and groaned into her palms. "Who even left that there? Now my mom is gonna think I own sex toys."

Octavia ran into her room to grab the box before passing it over to Clarke. "That's because you do."

The blonde shot Octavia a death glare. "Of all the times my mother could have chosen to stop by unannounced."


Clarke and Raven decided to text Lexa and Anya to ask them to come over that evening. Clarke figured the least she could do was warn the poor girls in person of what her mothers plans were.


"Anya just knock!" Lexa was quickly growing frustrated with her friend.

"We're two minutes early Lexa, I can't have Raven thinking I'm desperate to see her!"

"Oh my God Anya, it's two minutes! God, now I know why you really don't date." Anya glared at her friend before taking a deep breath and knocking.

Octavia opened the door with a huge grin on her face before turning to call over her shoulder. "Guys! Your lovers are here!"She turned back and motioned for the two to enter. "Hey guys."

Raven and Clarke walked over from the kitchen to bash the brunette; Raven giving her a death glare that immediately made Octavia regret her choice of words. "Hey." Raven went to hug Anya and the two friends shot each other a 'what the hell' look; Lexa mimicking their face as she mouthed 'you love her' to her now very angry looking roommate.

Clarke walked to Lexa's side and let herself fiddle with the girls hands. "So you both may want to sit down..."

Anya detached herself from the girl before making her way over to sit on the sofa by Lexa. "Why do we need to sit down?"

Fidgeting in her seat, Clarke sighed trying to find the words. Raven quickly grew impatient and decided she would be the one to put it out there. "Clarke's mother stopped by unannounced and has decided she will be joining us for coffee tomorrow." She moved her gaze to a very dumbfounded looking Lexa. "I don't know how much Clarke told you about her mother but shes the type of Republican that frowns on homosexuality... Well actually just about anything that she can disagree with."

Clarke ran her fingers through her hair and Lexa got up to move by her side; rubbing circles on the small of her back. "So did you come out to her?"

Clarke shuddered at the thought. "No, I don't think I want to. Not for a while anyway."

The brunette moved to kiss the girls forehead. "Hey, you never know, maybe she'll be okay with it."

Raven scoffed at the suggestion, prompting a slight glare from Lexa and Anya. "What? When I came out to her she told me that I hadn't met the right man and sent me on a date with some random dude. Then anytime I brought up that a girl was attractive Clarke's mom would roll her eyes and take Clarke out the room to suggest I needed to 'spend some time at church'."

Clarke snapped her head up in shock. "Wait, you heard that?! Why didn't you tell me!" Clarke felt waves of embarrassment then anger coursing through her. It was one thing to know her mother had said this, but to know that Raven heard made her feel horrific.

"Because your mom had a hard time since she," Raven stopped and reevaluated. "I didn't want to cause any more tension between the two of you."

Clarke knew exactly what Raven was going to say. Since she crashed the car and killed your father. Clarke pushed back the tears she felt coming to her eyes. She wouldn't think about this; not now. "I just want to survive this coffee date. I don't know if we should all just play it as heterosexual as humanly possible or-"

"Oh hell no!" Raven bellowed, draping an arm over Anya's shoulders. "I for one know I wont be able to play hetero sitting next to this." She gestured to Anya who was now blushing bright red; something Lexa rarely saw.

Anya cleared her throat. "Well, I believe Raven to be somewhat right. And maybe your mom watching how me and Raven are with one another will at least allow you to see how she responds."

Raven stuck her tongue to her cheek; a cocky look on her face. "Exactly what I said. Great minds as they say..."

Clarke rolled her eyes. "Fine. But you have been warned." She turned to Lexa, searching her face for any sign of what she was feeling. "If you're worried we don't have to do this."

"It's fine," Lexa smiled at the blonde. "It'll be nice to meet your mom without having to worry about getting 'the talk' anyhow." She winked at Clarke who proceeded to bash her playfully on the shoulder. "So do you think I'll be able to coax out anymore embarrassing stories from your past out of her? Though I doubt it'll top the one O told me about how you peed-"

Clarke gasped and powerfully punched the girls shoulder. "Never repeat that sentence if you wish to live another day."

Lexa raised her brow taking it as a challenge. "So Anya, did you know that when Clarke-"

Clarke straddled the girl and placed her palm over her mouth. "Don't!"

 

 

Chapter Text

Octavia was now digging her fingers into Clarke's shoulders as she shook her outside the coffee shop. "Come on, we've come this far. You can do this. Look, Anya and Lexa are coming up the road now, it's gonna be fine."

Clarke remained completely paralyzed in her friends arms. "Hey An!" Raven grinned and threw her arm around the girls shoulder, sighing when she saw they were staring at the blonde with a very concerned look in their eyes. "She's panicking slightly. It was all good up until we got here, then she saw Abby (her mom) inside... She kind of hasn't moved, spoken or acknowledged anyone's existence since." Raven waved a hand in front of the vacant eyes of the girl. "See... Nothing."

Gulping loudly, then moving forward to wave her hand in the girls line of vision; Lexa tried to bring Clarke to. She was already fearing meeting Abigail Griffin; having Clarke in an absent minded state was just making that fear grow, and Lexa did not take well to fear or anxiety, it was normally something she didn't tend to feel and if she did, she would simply remove herself from the situation. This however was different; this she was doing for Clarke. "Hey Clarke?" The girls face remained pale and hard as stone. Lexa moved closer pulling her to the side- out of the vision of those in the coffee shop- so that she could rest a hand beneath the hem of her t-shirt and rub calming circles at the base of her back. "Clarke? It's going to be fine. We're all here for you." Clarke nodded now but her eyes were still vacant. Lexa moved closer; lowering her voice and resting her mouth by the girls ear so that none of the other girls would here what she was about to say. "After coffee you could come back to my apartment if you wish; I've set up candles in the bedroom and I'll have you know I'm quite the masseus. And yes, this is definitely a ploy to see you topless." Lexa's voice was low and sultry as she continued; her hand now lowering to playfully grab at the girls ass. "And if you're topless, I suppose I would be to... It is only fair after all." Lexa grinned at the sharp intake of breath she heard coming from the girl.

"Oh my God did you just talk dirty to her?!" Octavia was feigning disgust where as Raven and Anya were simply biting there lips to restrain their laughter at the sight of a now beet red Clarke.

"Shut up!"

"Oh she speaks!" Raven raised her hand to her mouth in mock shock. "If only we had known we just needed to get you turned on to calm you down, we would of asked Lexa to get here a few minutes earlier." She turned to wink at the very smug looking brunette.

"Hey, I don't need a few minutes to turn-"

Clarke whirled and narrowed her gaze at Lexa; stopping her from proceeding with that sentence. She moved closer, then in a husky whisper, replied. "I'll deal with you later in your bedroom." This knocked the air out of Lexa's lungs, leaving her mouth wide and pupils blown as she watched the blonde walk towards the TonDC coffee shop door.

"You okay there chief?" Anya wrapped her free arm around Lexa's shoulder; her other hand intertwined with Raven's.

"Yeah, all good." Lexa cursed herself silently as her voice broke leaving Anya and Raven chuckling as they walked through the coffee shop door, moving towards a large table at the back left corner of the room where Clarke's mother sat.

"Hey Mom!" Clarke forced a smile as she awkwardly hugged her mother, moving to sit on the couch opposite to her then trying not to show her relief as Lexa slid in next to her followed by Anya. Octavia and Raven sat down next to Abigail.

"Hey girls, nice to meet you two I'm Clarke's mother Abigail, but you can just call me Abby." Abigail held out a hand and firmly shook both of the girls hands as she smiled at them.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, I'm Anya and this is Lexa." Lexa smiled weakly as she tried to ignore the extreme waves of nausea taking host in the pit of her stomach.

The waiter came over and took the orders, quickly returning with coffees for everyone except for Octavia who sat with a hot chocolate covered in a mountain of whipped cream and sprinkles which she was hurriedly moving to dunk a donut into. "So its nice to see you're keeping my daughter busy."

Lexa spat her coffee into her mug and choked slightly. This was not going to be fun in the slightest. "Well," Lexa patted her chest slightly as the last choke escaped her. "your daughter is truly lovely."

Clarke moved her hand beneath the table to take the girls in a firm grasp; squeezing it slightly to calm her.

"So what are you girls studying?"

Clarke rolled her eyes at the question whereas Raven and Octavia visibly stiffened and held their breath. Anya swallowed her coffee and waited a few moments before deciding Lexa was probably not going to answer anytime soon and jumped in to save her ass. "I'm premed and Lexa is studying environmental science."

The girls let out the breath they were holding when Abigail nodded; approving. "Very good. It's nice to see Clarke is socializing with people who study science, maybe it will convince her that it is what she needs to be studying instead of wasting time throwing paint around."

Clarke narrowed her eyes slightly and took a large gulp of her coffee. Not here. Not now. Lexa tightened her hold on the girls hand and cleared her throat. "I don't know. Clarke has a lot of talent from what I have seen."

Abigail laughed slightly at this but remained otherwise silent. "So, are any of you girls seeing anyone?"

Clarke was now the one choking on hot coffee as her eyes widened at the question. Shit. Raven met Clarke's eyes and mouthed 'we've got this' at her before leaning across the table to take Anya's hand in her own. Everyone watched in shock but Anya simply smiled at Raven, intertwining her fingers with the girl's before her. "Anya and I are actually dating."

Abigail's mouth hung open for a good minute before she decided to close it, and even then it was simply because her jaw ached; not that the shock has subsided. "I see." She began to play with the rim of her coffee cup. "So I suppose you're still experimenting, with that and all then?"

Raven straightened up in her seat and smiled at Anya who was trying very hard not to laugh when thinking that what Raven had done to her in bed was 'experimenting'. "No Abby, I am still very much bisexual, and shall be for the rest of my life."

The woman nodded as she took in the girl opposite her who was grinning away; seemingly unaware of her discomfort. "Okay, but then if you like both genders why not chose a man? I mean there's plenty of lovely gentleman out there... You really just need to find the right guy."

"Mom!" Clarke slammed a hand onto the table, feeling horrible that her mother had the nerve to bring this up at all let alone in front of the girl her friend was dating.

"What Clarke? I was simply trying to explain that-"

"That what Mom? That because Anya has a vagina she's not good enough for Raven?! I can't believe that even now, at a time where in most states women can marry other women, you still think your prejudice has a place!" Clark was now shaking with rage and Lexa's hand had moved to her back; tracing circles in attempt to calm her.

"Clarke it's fine we can leave." Raven smiled at the girl reassuringly before moving to kiss Anya's forehead. "I am happy Abby, I like Anya very much and I won't let something as silly as the fact she's of the same gender as me keep me away from her. Yes, I could choose to be with a man, but I wouldn't be happy because that man would never compete with this beautiful girl. I can only hope you will in time understand that." Raven stood up.

"Raven wait, don't leave." Clarke pleaded; she wanted Raven to stay- as selfish as it was to ask- she needed her. Taking in a deep breath and looking to Anya for confirmation that it would be okay, Raven sat back down. "Mom, I can't believe that even after all that we went through, you're still saying things to push people away. People aren't here forever Mom, for God's sake I could die tomorrow! But if I decided I liked a girl would you still push me away just because of some prehistoric bigoted view?"

"Clarke, my views are my own and don't be so silly. I know that you like men, this isn't about you, it's about Raven."

"And Anya.." Octavia sputtered, trying to puncture the awkwardness slightly as she downed her hot chocolate.

"What if it is about me Mom?" Everyone's eyes went wide and Clarke suddenly regretted saying this. What if her mother disowned her? Stopped paying for her education. She barely talked to her as it was so that wasn't really something to worry about. Hell, she liked Lexa a lot, it would be worth it; she wasn't a secret Clarke wished to hide.

"What are you talking about Clarke? Is this your way of telling me you wish to experiment also?"

Clarke shook with rage and nerves. She hadn't felt this emotional since her fathers funeral; it was not a feeling she enjoyed. "No Mom, this is my way of telling you that I am seeing a girl!" She looked toward Lexa, waiting for her nod (and nervous gulp) of approval. "Lexa is my girlfriend," She raised their intertwined hands before placing them on the table in full view of Abigail. Suddenly Clarke began to panic more, fuck, she had just called Lexa her girlfriend. Well, there was no turning back now. "and I am so amazingly happy Mom. Lexa makes me so happy. She makes me smile and laugh, and she holds my hair when I'm ill and-"

"And what Clarke? Do you know how your going to explain this to your grandparents? How do you think your father would have felt?" Abigail regretted the words as soon as they left her mouth. If the wide eyed, angered stares weren't enough to make her regret the choice, Clarke's face filled with tears as she ran out the door would have been.

"Clarke, wait!" Raven pulled Anya out towards the girl who was walking very fast down the road, leaving Lexa and Octavia with the angered woman. Octavia stood and waited for Lexa to join her. "You know what Abby, I've sat back the last few years since Jake passed, and yes I know it was horrific and you miss him, but Clarke misses him just as much. She still wakes up crying when she has a dream about the accident and I am the one whose there for her because you've just pushed her further and further away. God, It's like Clarke lost two parents that day. She's been trying so happy to please you, to make you happy; even with how you have treated her. She's been chosen to showcase as a leading artist as the showcase and you couldn't even make an attempt to try and move things around to come! And then you tell her that Lexa, who I've seen how your daughter looks at her," Lexa blushed and moved her gaze quickly to the table in front of her. "Clarke loves her for God's sake and you tell her that love is wrong?!" Lexa's jaw hung open slightly; Abigail's almost hit the floor as tears filled her eyes.

"Clarke loves you?" Abigail turned her attention to Lexa who was wriggling awkwardly in her seat.

"Please Abigail!" Octavia sat by Lexa and ran her fingers through her hair. "Just look at the way she watches her. I mean don't get me wrong it makes me sick, they're far too cute together." Octavia smiled slightly when Lexa chuckled at this.

"Do you love my daughter Lexa?"

Octavia immediately felt very panicked. Shit. She didn't want Lexa to feel pressured into answering and to be honest they hadn't known each other for long so she'd probably say-

"Yes, I love Clarke." Lexa answered without consideration. She knew she loved Clarke from the moment she had wiped her tears away in the restaurant toilet. To be honest, she felt as though she had since she held Clarke's hair back for her as she was sick. Lexa wasn't the caring type, or one to show emotion, but with Clarke... Clarke made it easy as if they'd known each other since childhood. She didn't have to question her love for Clarke, because it had been apparent to her for quite some time.

Abigail's breath hitched as it finally dawned on her. She had pushed her daughter- everyone- away from her. She had spent years prodding and prodding at Clarke's insecurities and ignored her when she had so clearly been trying. She had found prejudice in topics that before hand never bothered her, simply because it was another way to push people away. God she had been so cruel. All these years Clarke had simply needed her mother to be there for her and she hadn't even been able to do this, and now she had hurt Clarke more than she thought possible, and she had clearly upset those she loves... the one she loves. "I'm sorry." Abigail clenched her hair in her hands. Why had she wasted the years she needed to be there most for her daughter? "I'm sorry Lexa, I didn't mean what I said. I was so worried your relationship would hurt her, but clearly that's what I've been doing for quite some time."

Octavia moved to Abigail's side and wrapped an arm around her shoulder. "She still loves you you know?"

Abigail chuckled anxiously. "I doubt that, after what I just said to her it wouldn't surprise me if she never spoke to me again."

"No, if you apologize to her and explain why you were just such a raging bitch-" The two girls widened their eyes in shock as the words left Octavia's mouth. Thankfully Abigail simply laughed in agreement. She had been a total raging bitch. "I'm sure Clarke will accept it. She's very forgiving Abby, just like-"

"Just like her father." Abigail laughed, remembering how Jake once tipped a waiter thirty dollars after crap service because the lad explained he had broken up with his girlfriend, and just like that Jake's rage had disappeared. "Perhaps you two could come with me to see her? I believe I still owe you girls a coffee without being a raging bitch."

Any trace of worry Octavia had felt disappeared quickly when a large smile spread across Abigail's face; a sight she hadn't seen since before Jake's passing. "I'm up for that, Lexa?"

Lexa nodded apprehensively. "If Clarke is okay with it then it is fine by me."

 

 

Chapter Text

 

Abigail breathed in deeply, raising her fist to the door and exhaling as she knocked. "What if she doesn't answer? I mean I wouldn't blame her."

Octavia waited a minute then moved to knock herself. "Clarke let me in dammit. Your mother can wait out here if that's what you so wish but god dammit I have to pee and I have a lesson and I can't go with pee all over my-"

Raven opened the door and motioned for Lexa and Octavia to enter, shutting it slightly when Abigail approached. "I don't mean to be rude Abi, it's one thing to hurt me, but when you hurt the girl I'm dating too that's something I will not overlook. Let alone how you hurt Clarke." She shook her head and looked back into the apartment. Lexa had made her way into Clarke's bedroom and the blonde's sniffling and hushed sobs filled the air.

Cringing at the sound and Raven's words Abigail dropped her head. "I understand this. I came to apologize." Raven's eyes widened and she nodded slightly, not having expected this at all. "What I said earlier was cruel and harsh. You deserve to be happy and you deserve to be with Anya, she seems to be a lovely girl, who I owe an apology to also."

Raven moved her gaze to her feet to process the words before opening the door up slightly to let Abigail in. Clarke was in her room and safe should her mother come out with something bitchy once more. "Anya," Abigail nodded to the girl who sat on the sofa braiding Octavia's hair; she paused for a moment, taking in Clarke's mothers presence before returning her focus on her friends hair.

"Abigail." She returned, still not sparing a glance at the woman.

"Look, I need to apologize to all of you, especially Clarke." Abigail spoke louder now, her voice filling the room, and as she had hoped, Clarke's. "Anya, Raven, I am so sorry, so very sorry for what I said earlier. It was ignorant and unprovoked, and to be honest none of it was true. I'm happy to see you girls together, your sexuality is none of my business in the first place, but I did not mean what I said."

"Then why would you comment on it?" Anya finally met Abigail's tearful gaze with her own slightly annoyed look. Abigail's words had brushed off of her immediately but holding Clarke's hair as she threw up in a state of complete shock after what her mother had said had thrown her over the edge. No one should feel able to cause someone such pain and get away with it easily.

Abigail sighed and sat down, earning a harsh look from Anya. This woman does not deserve a seat. "I commented because I was being ignorant." Taking a deep breath she prepared for what she was about to tell them, she did not wish to speak of it aloud- in fact she hadn't since the event- but she owed these girls an explanation after what she had said. "About 6 years ago, I was driving back home from dinner with Clarke's grandparents with Clarke and her father. I was tired, and not paying as much attention as I should have been." Her eyes began to fill with tears but she heard Clarke's sobs silence suddenly. "A truck drifted onto our side of the road as the driver had fallen asleep." Anya's immediate intake of breath was the only noise to fill the air when Abigail finished. "I didn't realize in time, and by the time I swerved it was too late." Her voice cracked now as she spoke; the emotion forming a lump in the back of her throat. "The lorry clipped the back of the car and it rolled." Speaking each word was now emotionless, the numb feeling taking over her body when she thought of the event, as if it were a dream. "Someone in a car behind us stopped and pulled me and Clarke free."

Anya's jaw dropped, a look of realization and horror filling her eyes. "My god." She whispered.

"The boy went back to get Clarke's father, but when he returned to the car and had his arms around Jake to pull him free... The car caught alight. The two of them suffered burns so bad that they were pronounced dead at the scene." Abigail's eyes were completely vacant as she finished, but somehow relief washed over her. Speaking of this was something she had refused to do for so long, but now she felt free, like people would understand and even if they blamed her, she would accept that too. She was done hiding in fear, behind a cruel facade that hurt others.

Anya stood up and ran her fingers through her hair shaking slightly. "Babe, whats up?" Raven stood up and tried to calm the girl.

"Fuck." She whispered, before returning her watery gaze to Abi. "The boy, the boy who got caught in the fire, what was his name?"

Abigail opened and closed her mouth a couple times in confusion before replying. "His name was Nyko. I don't see what that has to do with any-"

Anya buried her face into her palms. "Nyko was my best friend and he was Lexa's brother."

Silence filled the room and the sobs that tainted the still air were no longer Clarke's; they were pained and unfamiliar. "Lexa, Lex, I've got you."

Anya rose and without thinking walked into the other room to find her friend, tears now lining her face. Abigail followed behind; she had to explain, she had to apologize, she never got the chance to apologize. "Abi wait," Raven gripped her wrist before she could enter the room. "they will come out when they're ready."

"But I need to-"

Nodding, Raven pulled her back towards the sofa. "I know, it can wait. They've got to process this themselves first." Raven sat her down on the sofa and moved to pour some coffee, Octavia sitting down on the counter in front of her.

"How? What? Just, how?" She stared vacantly in front of her. They were both aware of the young boy who saved their best friend and her mother; who tried to save Jake. They were aware because they spent years- and still nights now- holding Clarke as she awoke and trembled, screaming at the memory as if it was a battle with which she would never win.

"I don't know." Raven finished poring the coffee and stood, staring at the liquid.


Clarke could hear her mothers voice as she recounted the accident. Her body felt numb, she had never heard her mother talk of the accident. She had been asleep at the time, and awoken as the car flew through the air.

"I didn't realize in time, and by the time I swerved it was too late." It wasn't your fault. It was his fault. The driver had worked 3 shifts straight and ignored his sleep rotor hoping to get back to his family earlier.

"Clarke." Lexa was sat behind her, having pulled the blonde into a tight hug as she rested her chin on her shoulder, her words tickling Clarke's ear as she spoke. "You were in an accident?" Lexa's voice was cold and distant. She was trying to reassure her girlfriend but the thought of her brothers accident plagued her mind.

Clarke simply nodded against her, pulling up her jacket sleeve to reveal a long scar along the length of her arm. "Could have been worse." She mumbled, her words and actions automatic.

"Someone in a car behind us stopped and pulled me and Clarke free."

Clarke swallowed. The boy. Her angel. He had no reason to help, his friends sat in the car but he chose to save them. "He chose to save me. I, I could have died, but he saved me. When I wake up some nights I can still feel his arms around me when I see the wreck. It's the only comfort in my dreams, I feel like he still keeps me safe y'know."

"The boy went back to get Clarke's father, but when he returned to the car and had his arms around Jake to pull him free... The car caught alight. The two of them suffered burns so bad that they were pronounced dead at the scene."

Lexa stiffened. No. It couldn't be. "Nyko." She whispered.

"His name was Nyko."

Clarke froze. She hadn't known the name of the boy who had saved her until this point, her mother had kept her away from the details as much as possible. Lexa's brother saved me. Lexa's brother is my angel. The thoughts hit her hard and tears were streaming down her face but the cries that filled the air were no longer hers. "Lexa, Lex, I've got you." Clarke turned around and took a Lexa into a firm grasp; trying to stop the violent sobs and shudders that escaped her. "I've got you." She rocked the girl in her arms.

"Nyko." She cried into Clarke's shoulder, her tears staining the girls shirt. "He, he died because of that man Clarke."

Clarke ran her fingers through the girls hair. "He died a hero Lexa." The words, though holding little to his death, hit Lexa hard. Her brother was a hero. Without her brother, Abigail and Clarke- the girl she loved- would be gone. Her brother saved the one she loves.

"How did it happen Clarke? How bad was it?" Lexa didn't want to know but the vague police report that she had read countless times over was an emotionless story that bore no image to play through in her mind. It was facts.

"He saved us Lexa. No one else stopped or left their vehicles. He told me it would be okay and that I was safe, that I had to keep my eyes open." Tears ran freely down both girls cheeks. "I told him he was my angel, that he had saved us. My voice was the last one he heard... My dad was unconscious when he tried to free him. People were screaming the whole time for him to just leave the car, to leave him, to leave me. He didn't leave us Lexa, he tried to save my dad. He saved us."

"His death?" Lexa whimpered.

"Fast, the blaze that took the car was so big. They were lost to it. There was no way we could,"

Lexa held tightly onto her girlfriend as she heard her words. "He saved you Clarke. He was always trying to help people." Lexa trembled as the sobs escaped her. "I just don't understand how this, how he, how we... It was in my hometown Clarke, the wreck."

"It was the town where my grandparents lived."

Lexa shook her head. How. Of all of the people on this earth. Of all the people she could have met, have fallen in love with. It was fate. For years she had worried about the screams her brother would have heard, the fear he would have felt when he died. But now she knew he had heard Clarke's voice, that she had told him of what a hero he was. He had known this when he died. He had known her.

Anya entered the room and strode over to the bed, taking Lexa and Clarke into her embrace. "He saved them Lex."


An hour passed when the tears subsided. Anya walked back into the room and was taken into an embrace on the couch by Raven who proceeded to stroke her hair. Lexa and Clarke followed in minutes later; fingers intertwined as they walked to the middle of the room to be met by Abigail. "Clarke-"

"Mom please. I love Lexa, I don't know if she feels the same way" She looked to Lexa and hoped she wouldn't be too shocked by the statement but oddly she caught her sharing a slight smile with Abigail. "but I will be with her for as long as she can put up with me. If you can't accept that, then I can't be a part of your life anymore."

"Clarke, I," Abigail looked between Lexa and Clarke. "I love you for whoever you are... For whoever you love." She smiled slightly at Lexa before taking their intertwined hands into her own. "This, if it makes you happy, makes me happy. I didn't mean a thing I said earlier, hell that I've said over the past years. I'm sorry Clarke. I've been cruel and I've been vacant when you needed me most. I just couldn't accept it. It should have been me to die that night Clarke. I was driving. It shouldn't have been your father or Nyko." She tightened her grasp on the girls hands when she felt them flinch at the mention of the two men. "Nyko saved us though, he was a hero and he was strong and brave. He pulled us free when a moments hesitation would have left us in that blaze. He was strong Lexa. He shouldn't have had to save us though and for that I will never be sorry enough. I should have been more alert, I should have avoided that truck and they should both still be with us."

Lexa wiped her tears away with her free hand and took Abby's free hand in her own. "It was not your fault Abi. It was the man who was driving the truck. He is the one who shouldn't have been in your lane, he should have been on the opposite side of the road. There's no way you could have known he would drift into oncoming traffic, and even if you had of been faster, whose to say you would have made it away in time. It was his fault Abi. It was not yours. Nyko would have known the risk but had you of escaped he would have tried to save the others who would have been hit. God, it could have even been him."

Clarke pulled her mother in for a tight embrace, the first one since her fathers death that hadn't felt awkward and forced. "It wasn't your fault Mom."


Eventually the three women joined the others on the sofa; the whole lot of them cuddling up together underneath a blanket with coffee, except for Octavia who had an extremely large hot chocolate in hand. "Maybe we need some comedy." Clarke flitted through the Netflix comedy section. "Ooh what about Orange Is the New Black?" Anya grinned as Lexa and Clarke shot her a 'no way in hell bitch' look. "Fine. Grace and Frankie? It's hilarious." Clarke nodded before pressing play on the first episode.


They watched in silence apart from laughter until a joke about sex toys was made. Clarke cringed internally and avoided all eye contact with her mother. This was not the kind of thing they talked about or watched with one another. She held her breath as she waited for the awkwardness to leave the room.

"So," Abigail broke the silence. Oh god how Clarke wished she hadn't. What the hell is she gonna say. "wheres that piece of art you had on the table yesterday Octavia?"

Octavia went wide eyed and her jaw dropped as she looked at Abigail in pure fear. She knew what it was. The three girls felt their hearts stop then almost jump out of their mouths as Abigail began to laugh. "Is there something I'm missing?" Anya raised a brow.

"Nu uh. Nope. Nothing." Octavia was now bright red, a color similar to her two friends who were still sat with huge eyes.

Abigail was sat laughing at the end of the sofa, and though totally embarrassed her mother knew about the sex toy and had brought it up in front of company, Clarke couldn't help but burst out into a fit of giggles herself. Never in the past six years had she thought she'd see her mother smile or laugh again, let alone be joking around about sex toys in front of her girlfriend.

"What are we not getting?" Lexa was now sat with Anya, both of their arms crossed across their chest. "Explain..."

 

 

Chapter Text

The three girls shifted in their seats, blushing profusely. "Uh, well, um," Raven mindlessly toyed with the edge of the blanket as she spoke. She was normally confident about this kind of thing but around Abigail and Anya? Another wave of heat flushed her cheeks as she thought of what she could possibly say to make this subject go away.

"Abigail uh, she found a um, well it was a thing that belonged to me..." Octavia did her best to stress the past tense as she spoke. She felt no shame for owning the toy as such, it was mostly just the second hand embarrassment that Clarke was emitting that was now penetrating her skin; seeping in like a warm and anxious virus.

Anya narrowed her gaze. "What? I'm confused."

"That makes two of us..." Lexa was staring curiously at the women who were all focusing rather intently upon their whitened knuckles from their tight grips upon the blanket and cushions.

"Abigail found a sex toy." Octavia looked up to see Clarke's wide eyed pleading gaze. "My sex toy. Abigail found my sex toy. That's me. Reckless Octavia. Leaving my stuff on the coffee table for everyone to see."

Anya slowly removed her feet from where they resided on the tainted coffee table. "Oh." Her and Lexa simultaneously mumbled; Lexa studying Clarke's badly masked, relieved reaction with intrigue.

"Dare I ask why you left it there?" Anya raised a brow at the girl who bit her lip and raised her shoulders.

"It's art." She added, her voice slightly too high for the statement to pass as truth.

"I see so why did you move the art?" Anya remained completely stone faced as she spoke, easily hiding the humor she felt towards the situation.

"Because even though Octavia finds it pretty, it's hardly appropriate apartment decor." Clarke rose as she spoke, heading over to the sink to pour a glass of water. This topic could not be forgotten soon enough, she mentally noted to scold her mother for bringing it up later. Octavia pouted as Clarke spoke; she believed the collection would make great apartment decoration.

"Right I should be off now." Abigail rose from the sofa before holding out her hand to shake Lexa and Anya's. "It was lovely meeting you girls, well, I was a complete demon at first; but I hope you can understand I am no longer that person."

Abigail breathed a sigh of relief when the girls accepted the handshake, albeit with slight hesitation on Lexa's part (she was still yet to forgive her for making Clarke cry). "I'm glad I got to meet you." Lexa's words were sincere, how badly they got off she could put aside (slightly) but she was Clarke's mother and she needed to show Clarke she was trying.

"Maybe we could do this again some time, coffee that is, a do-over?"

Smiling apprehensively and looking to Clarke for a confirmation it was okay, Lexa eventually nodded. "Sure."

Abigail bounced slightly at the girls words. "Great, I shall arrange it with Clarke." She moved to take Clarke in for a hug. "I'll bring that baby album I've been waiting for years to whip out!"

Clarke's jaw dropped and she stared at her mother in horror. "You wouldn't-"

"I would. It's motherly tradition Clarke. Especially your bathtub shots." She turned to Lexa; ignoring the loud groans from her daughter and snorting from her friends. "Clarke refused to bathe without her plastic dinosaur, Sid, until she was six, or was it seven Clarke?"

Clarke pushed her mother towards the door, her face bright red. "I think that's enough discussion time for today Mom."

"Well, I need to call work anyway. Lexa, remind me to tell you of the school trip where-"

"Already sorted that one Abi!" Octavia grinned at the pair.

"Oh my God this is the second time I've heard of this story, could someone just fill me in dammit." Anya's groans subsided when Octavia turned to her; a mischievous grin on her face.

"Right you're leaving!" Clarke pushed her out the door. "Text me and let me know what days you're available. I have lessons and lectures all day tomorrow but after that I think I'm free."

"Okay, I shall, and Clarke," Abigail took her daughters hands in her own "I truly am sorry for everything. I know saying this now won't make up for the years of what I've done... What I've said, but I hope over the years to come I can make up for it slightly."

Clarke was trying to listen to her mom, but all she could focus on were Anya's gasps and squawks of laughter as Octavia retold every detail of how she peed herself, with a lot more detail then was needed. Did she really have to mention how it trailed down the floor of the place because of the ramp. God dammit.

"Okay Mom, I'll text you." Clarke smiled, having heard some of what her mother had said. She was trying. Abigail nodded and left, returning the smile.

"And then everyone at the bottom of the ramp realized what they were stood in-"

"O that's enough! Shut it!" Clarke slammed the door and ran, jumping to pounce on her friend and hitting her on the head with a comforter as she landed.

"But I didn't even get to the best parttttttttt!" Octavia's whines were muffled by the pillow that Clarke was still holding on her face.

"I think Anya has heard enough!" Clarke moved the pillow and hit the girl on the shoulder before sliding to the side and landing atop of Lexa's lap.

"I don't think Anya has." Anya added, smirking at the narrowed glare the blonde shot her upon hearing the words.

Raven noted how Lexa's fingers were trying to soothe the girl by trailing figure eights on her upper thigh and immediately shot Clarke a questioning look; causing her to blush. "Maybe we should discuss it at your place, or over coffee... Y'know... give these two some time to work out their... tension." The brunette winked at her friend who was simply looking at her with her best 'I'm going to skin you alive later' look.

Anya raised a brow before following Raven's eye line to where Lexa was still aimlessly playing with the girls thigh. She smirked at the couple and stood. "I could do with a coffee. O? You game?"

Octavia huffed. She wanted to stay in and watching television, but she didn't wish to do so whilst the other two tried to ignore their thick sexual tension for God knows how many more hours. "I'm in."

The three hurried to the door after Clarke finally located Octavia's wallet. She sighed disapprovingly as she handed it over. Why must she always leave her stuff in the fridge?

Grinning, Octavia took the wallet and pulled her friend in closer; checking no one was in hearing distance before adding. "Do you guys need something while were out? Some snacks? A condom?"

Clarke rolled her eyes and hit the girl. "You're seriously still pulling out the mean girls references huh?"

"Don't hate me because I'm fetch." Octavia winked at her friend before heading out the door with Raven and Anya, yelling a quick 'be safe' before shutting the door.

The blonde sighed with relief; they were finally gone. As much as she loved her friends; she had been wanting to be alone with Lexa since hearing her say those things outside of the coffee shop. Clarke walked into the kitchen where the girl was sat on the counter top swinging her legs as her brow furrowed in thought. "You okay Lex?"

Lexa snapped out of her daze and immediately replied without thought. "Did you mean it when you said you loved me and when you called me your girlfriend in front of your mom? Or was that just to get under her skin?"

Clarke's mouth dropped open and shut a few times before she moved to stand between Lexa's legs, looking up to where she sat on the counter. "I, uh, yeah I meant it." Clarke's cheeks started to burn at the embarrassment and fear of how the girl would respond. Lexa's legs tightened around her waist slightly at the revelation, her eyes growing wide as she searched Clarke's face; waiting for her to look back up. "I'm sorry. I know we've hardly been dating that long, and oh God we hadn't even talked about being exclusive, and then I dump those massive words on you when you probably don't even feel the same way which would be totally fine because-"

Grinning, Lexa tilted the girl's flushed face up to meet hers, bringing Clarke's bottom lip in between her own. "I love you too Clarke Griffin. Though I'm kind of annoyed about the whole girlfriend thing."

The blonde looked up at her in astonishment, love, then fear. "I'm sorry, we don't have to-"

"I mean I kind of wanted to ask you. Y'know, for the street cred," Lexa winked at Clarke and bit her lip as she watched the relieved grin spread across the girls face. "can't have the other girls on the team thinking I'm weak."

Clarke laughed lightly and pulled her in for another kiss. "But then wouldn't I be the weak one?"

Shaking her head, Lexa wrapped her legs around Clarke in a firm hold. "Nope. I have the opportunity to ask the most beautiful girl in the world to be mine. Now how do you think they'd feel if they knew I had passed that opportunity up?"

Clarke pushed Lexa's legs down and moved back a step. "So maybe you should ask..."

Lexa was slightly taken aback by this, but quickly composed herself, simply raising a brow at the challenge before hopping down and taking Clarke's hands in her own. She breathed in deeply; trying to suppress the thudding of her heart that she could feel pounding against her chest. "Clarke Griffin," Another breath was taken; this time much more jagged as it passed the lump now forming in her throat. "would you be my girlfriend?"

Grinning profusely, Clarke kissed Lexa on the cheek. "Nope." Se replied before heading towards her bedroom laughing.

The brunette stood for a moment; trying to figure out what had just happened. "What do you mean no?!" She added, following after the girl who was laid there, laughing on her bed.

"I'm joking. Of course I will."

Lexa moved to straddle Clarke whose laughter hitched and eyes blackened as the girl sat atop of her. "You sure about that?"

Nodding, Clarke muttered a faint 'mmhmm' not trusting her voice to speak properly as her thoughts became very much focused on the heat forming between her legs.

"So what do you wanna do this afternoon?" Lexa ran her fingertips up Clarke's thigh; feeling the girl shudder beneath her touch.

"Um, I really need to get some sketching time in." Feeling her girlfriend retract her hand, she realized Lexa may have been hurt by her words. "Not that I don't want to continue, uh," She gestured to the brunettes body and herself. "this. I just really need to get another piece done before tomorrow or I may lose my place at the exhibition."

Lexa's eyes widened in realization that Clarke probably wanted to be alone and quickly jumped off her lap. "I'll uh, I'll leave you to that then." She moved in to kiss her but frowned when she saw the lips moving away from her.

"I was hoping you'd stay actually, I kinda wanted to draw you..." Clarke blushed as she moved her gaze from Lexa to the floor, remembering the last time she had been caught sketching her.

"Oh," Her cheeks began to burn too knowing Clarke wanted to draw her. "That'd be cool." She laid down on the bed resting her head on her hand, her elbow propping her up above the mattress. Play it cool Lexa. "So how do you want me?" She raised a brow, causing Clarke's blush to deepen. Nailed it.

"I wanted to draw your tattoos, so if you can turn with your back to me... Preferably with your shirt off... I mean if you're comfortable with that and all."

Lexa audibly swallowed. Shit perhaps I played that too cool. "Uh, yeah sure, that's fine." She turned so that her back was to Clarke then took a deep breath in as her fingers played with the hem of her shirt. You've been almost naked in bed with her. You can do this. She swallowed again and as she breathed out pulled her shirt over her head. "Do you um, do you need my bra off?"

She smirked as she heard the blonde's breath halter, a slight squeak escaping her. "That would be helpful." Clarke's voice broke as she spoke and she immediately chastised herself mentally before continuing. "If you're okay with that.I don't want to ask for anything you wouldn't feel comfortable with."

Lexa raised a hand to her back and with one smooth action the bra came undone before she pulled it off entirely. "It's okay Clarke. Your an artist, I'm sure you've seen loads of naked bodies." Lexa rolled her eyes at her words. Thankfully Clarke was facing her back so the brunettes blush was entirely hidden. She didn't really feel comfortable with being this naked (when Clarke was fully clothed at least) but she wanted to appear confident and not the anxious wreck she truly was.

"Nothing like you though," Clarke absentmindedly let her fingers trail along the bold black tattoo that covered the girls back, down to where the bottom letter (she assumed to be from a foreign alphabet) disappeared into the waistband of her skinny jeans. She felt Lexa's back straighten and her skin shiver beneath her touch. "Shit, sorry, I didn't mean to-"

Lexa's laughter filled the air and Clarke immediately relaxed. "It's okay Clarke, but it's kind of cold so if you could start drawing now I'd really appreciate it."

Clarke took note of the goosebumps that covered the girl before her and moved to grab the blanket she was sitting on, throwing it so it fell into the front of her girlfriends lap. "I know its not much but it'll at least keep your... front warm." She cringed. Why can't I just say boobs? It'll keep your boobs warm Lexa. She shuddered at the thought. Drawing attention to her boobs while she was naked would not have been nice, even though Clarke was sure Lexa's breasts were probably the most amazing sight she would ever see (if she was ever lucky enough to).

"Thanks."

"I'm drawing now, I swear." Clarke rested her head on the headboard as she worked her charcoal against the paper- she normally preferred pencil for drawing but she thought Lexa's tattoos would look pretty damn cool in the other medium.

Lexa laughed. "It's okay. Take your time. My... front is warm now anyhow."

Clarke screwed her face up hearing her words leave the girls mouth. God she must think I'm such a dork. She's probably all experienced and what not and I can't even say the fucking word 'boobs'. Dear God. She hurriedly moved the charcoal against the paper as she let herself get lost in her drawing and the toned back before her.

Sighing in accomplishment, Clarke held her drawing up to get a better look of it against the subject. Not bad, She thought, finally becoming aware of just how slow Lexa's breathing had become. Shit, maybe she's asleep. Fuck. What if she is asleep? How am I meant to wake her without the risk of her getting scarred and jumping and oh fuck what if I see her boobs. I mean, sure, I wouldn't mind seeing her boobs, but if my cheeks go red she's gonna think I'm some inexperienced loser who-

"Clarke can you stop thinking so loud?" Lexa turned her head to meet her wide eyed glare with a smirk.

"I wasn't thinking." Lies.

Lexa chuckled. "Clarke, you held your breath for like an entire minute. I think you were."

Clarke's cheeks burned and she moved to hit Lexa's shoulder to take the smug look off her face. "Fine. Maybe I was. I'm done by the way."

"So what were you thinking about, if you don't mind me asking? You totally don't have to answer that." Lexa pulled her bra on but struggled to hook it at the back.

Taking a deep breath Clarke raised her hands to take it from Lexa's grasp; moving in closer so that she was sat directly behind the girl as did her bra up. "I uh, don't laugh at me okay.

Lexa tried to ignoring the warmth that pooled between her legs at her girlfriends touch and nodded. "I would never laugh at you Clarke. Well... unless it was funny then I'm sorry but I probably would."

Clarke giggled nervously; her breath tickling at Lexa's neck, causing the girl to cross her legs at the sensation Clarke was inducing. "Okay. Well... The thing is... I've never been with a girl." Lexa laughed slightly and Clarke moved to hit her. "You said you wouldn't laugh asshole!"

Lexa raised her hands in surrender though Clarke couldn't see them. "I'm sorry,sorry, geez. It's just I already knew that Clarke. I don't care babe."

Clarke's eyes widened at the name and she saw Lexa stiffen slightly as the word left her mouth. "I'm just worried because you're all experienced and my only experience has been with guys, and I don't think my last boyfriend Finn counts as I think I only had one orgasm out of all the times we had sex." Closing her eyes she breathed in and tried to figure out why she had thought the last part appropriate. Yes Clarke, tell Lexa of your orgasmless pit of sadness.

Laughing lightly Lexa turned; forgetting she was topless, and took Clarke's cheek in her hand. "Clarke, it's fine. I haven't exactly slept with many girls and every girl is different with what they like anyway, so I'll be figuring it out as well as you."

Letting her eyes drop to the breasts clad in a black lace bra in front of her, the blonde swallowed. "Okay."

Lexa suddenly felt very exposed; realizing she had forgotten to put her top back on. "Shit, sorry." She moved to grab her top but felt Clarke trailing her fingers along her hip bone and stopped.

"We can move slowly if you want." She closed her eyes as she felt Clarke's fingers move higher up along her rib cage.

"Is that what you want?" Clarke stopped her fingers before they got to the bottom of her girlfriends bra.

"No, I mean, I just want you to feel comfortable. I'm okay with whatever you ahhhhhh-"

Lexa's eyes rolled back as Clarke gripped her right breast firmly.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to-" Clarke went to remove her hand but stopped when Lexa's covered her own.

"No, It's good. I just, uh... That's kind of my biggest turn on spot."

Clarke tightened her grasp and this time didn't let go as Lexa's gasp filled the thick air between them. Her other hand moved to Lexa's back and hovered over the strap, waiting for her to nod before she undid the clasp, removing the last bit of clothing from her girlfriends chest. Leaning back the blonde haltered for a second. She is beautiful. She trailed her eyes along the tanned skin, lingering for a while on the curve of her breast before taking in her nipples. Oh dear God she's perfect.

Clarke realized she had perhaps been staring too long when Lexa cleared her throat. "You okay? " She nodded at the brunette. She was very much okay. Too okay in fact. "We don't have to continue if you don't-"

Lexa's words were cut of when the girl's hand covered her now bare breast, her other moving to hold the brunettes back as she pulled her in for a kiss. The kiss was not soft by any means; teeth clashed as she bit down on the lip between her own, eliciting a deep moan from the blonde. "I want to." Clarke moaned into the kiss. She lifted her other hand, allowing them to explore both of the girls bare breasts, grinning into the kiss as Lexa gasped when she rubbed her nipple between her thumb and her finger. She replicated the action on the other simultaneously and couldn't ignore the wetness that was pooling between her thighs when Lexa moaned even louder.

"Fuck, Clarke." Clarke was now very happy her roommate was out. She took a mental note to avoid Lexa's breasts when she was in.

Opening her eyes, Lexa rested her gaze upon Clarke who was staring at her with an affection she had never seen before. An affection and what she deemed- by the blue eyes that were now swamped by black- to be lust. Moving her hand to tug at Clarke's shirt she stopped moaning for a second, her voice breathless. "Can I take this off?"

Clarke swallowed loudly but nodded, watching and raising her arms as Lexa pulled the shirt over her head before moving to take her bra covered breast into her hand. Clarke let her eyes close as she enjoyed the sensation, the burning from her girlfriends touch adding fuel to the fire that burned lower.

Lexa kissed along the curve of the girls chest. "And this?" She looked up to meet the wild eyes as she pulled at Clarke's bra strap.

"Yeah." Clarke managed to breath as she lent in to Lexa who very easily undid her bra before throwing it to the side. Opening her eyes, Clarke finally set her gaze upon the girl before her, fearing her judgment but instead meeting the sight of equally blackened eyes, and Lexa's bottom lip trapped between her teeth.

Lexa chewed her lip. She had felt a deep attraction to the girls she had been with before, she had thought what she felt with Costia was so strong it was love. However, as she let her eyes glaze over the large, ivory skinned breasts in front of her her throat quickly became dry. She was very wrong. What she felt for Clarke was a burning fire that no one could put out. Her desire for Costia was greatly less significant, so much so she wanted to laugh for even thinking it was the be all and end all, it was a mere lit match compared to this. When she looked up to Clarke's eyes and felt her heart in her throat, the need to protect and care for this girl until she died... She knew what she felt for Clarke was love. "I love you." The words came out choked and her eyes felt wet.

Clarke's last morsels of embarrassment faded as soon as the words left her girlfriends lips. That and the adoration she was staring at her with made her wonder what on earth she would do without this girl in her life, this girl as hers. "I love you too." Clarke replied, the words equally as breathless.

Hearing Clarke say that was all Lexa needed to make her take Clarke's face to hers once more; her second hand supporting Clarke's neck as she laid her on the bed.

Clarke kissed the girl passionately, ignoring the fact she would pass out if she didn't come up to breathe soon. Before she had the chance, Lexa was torn from her lips and she groaned at the separation causing the girl to laugh as she worked her way down the blonde's chest, kissing her gently. "Hey, come back; I wasn't done with you."

Lexa's laughter vibrated against her chest and she frowned at the girl who was tormenting her. The frown quickly disappeared though as Lexa's kisses enveloped her nipple; her tongue running across the now hardened tip before the brunette took it fully into her mouth, sucking so hard the painful pleasure caused Clarke's hips to buck forward into her own. "Fuckk." Lexa eased up the pressure slightly and slid her thigh between Clarke's legs, allowing the girl to rub herself against it the next time her hips raised.

Clarke shuddered as she raised her hips in pleasure only to meet Lexa's toned thigh. If she didn't still have her jeans on she would be worried about getting it wet, though she was sure Lexa wouldn't mind. The brunette continued to suck on her nipple for a minute before moving the attention to Clarke's neck, making her toes curl as the rhythm of Lexa's hips met her own. When Lexa's the lips met Clarke's pulse point she moaned so loudly she would have been embarrassed had Lexa not have growled slightly at the noise. "Lex, my, neck," She moaned between heavy breaths. "it, kinda, makes me, really turned on." The brunette bit down on her slightly before sucking harder. "Oh fuck!" That is definitely going to leave a mark. Clarke didn't care though, at this point all she could focus on was the sensation building between her legs. "Lexa, I want you to fuck me."

Lexa swallowed. There was nothing in the world that could turn her on more then hearing the blonde mutter those six words. "You're sure?"

Instead of nodding Clarke moved Lexa's hand from where it rested on her breast down to her pants. "Fuck me."

Nodding, Lexa quickly undid the button then the zip, hesitating slightly before moving to pull off the trousers and throwing them to the floor. As she crawled back up the girls body she took in the pastel lace that was left covering her and tried to remember to breath properly. She bit her lip and laid on top of Clarke, eliciting a moan as she trailed a hand up between her legs on top of her panties. The girls breath hitched and hips bucked into the touch, wanting so much more than Lexa was giving. Clarke's eyes rolled back as Lexa ran her fingertips back up the inside of her thigh before running it along her covered center once more. Her girlfriend moaned loudly beneath her, muttering curses beneath her breath as Lexa continued to tease her for minutes more. "Lex, please fuck me."

Pupils now entirely blown, Lexa nodded, moving the panties to the side and inhaling deeply as she let one finger trail along the girls now entirely bare and very wet center. "Fuck." This time it was Lexa who moaned as she felt her girlfriends arousal on her finger.

"Hey Clarke are you done drawing LexAAAHHH HOLY SHIT."

Lexa threw herself from the bed, covering her body with the blanket before moving to sit next to Clarke in attempt to hide her too. This was hardly needed though as Octavia now had her eyes covered with both hands. "I um, just wanted to know if you guys wanted food and drink? We got coffee..."

"Don't you kno-" Clarke's words stopped when she felt Lexa's finger trailing up her center; the action covered entirely by the blanket. She turned her head to see Lexa still very much focused on her friend as if nothing was happening, the only thing giving her away was the smirk that resided on her face. Clarke waited for Lexa to stop before continuing. "Why the hell are you home so soon anyw-" Lexa pushed two fingers deep into the girls center as she continued to watch Octavia, who- luckily- still had her eyes covered.

Clarke stifled her moan by biting deep into her lip. Holy shit that felt good.

"I didn't mean to, you text and said you were drawing Lexa, and my God unless that's some kind of weird artist sex code I don't know, AND we've been gone for like three hours, christ. I'm the one that's had to see you two doing it, GROSS BY THE WAY. I'm gonna need years of therapy to unsee your god damned boobs Clarke." Octavia's words were muffled by her hands as she spoke.

Clarke was trying to focus on Octavia but all she could focus on were her eyes rolling back into her head as the waves of pleasure coursed through her body with the quickening pace of Lexa's fingers, a slight moan escaping her when, did she just add a third finger? Clarke opened her eyes to see the smirk on her girlfriends face growing larger. That would be a yes. Luckily Clarke remembered Octavia was still in the room before her moans became too audible. "Okay, I'm not sorry tho, you should knock O!" Clarke's voice broke each time Lexa's fingers entered her.

"Well I bloody well am going to now aren't I! Anyway, get your asses dressed and come drink your drinks before they get cold. If you don't I'm sending Raven in." She turned to quickly leave, slamming the door behind her.

As the door shut Lexa swung a leg over so she was straddling Clarke. "I can't believe you just-" Clarke was trying to be mad but that was much harder than suspected with her girlfriend's fingers still moving inside her. "I'm gonna get you back for that." She groaned. Lexa chuckled but frowned when Clarke grabbed her wrist to stop her.

"I'm sorry Clarke, I didn't mean to upset yo-"

A grin grew across Clarke's face. "Believe me that didn't upset me but I will be getting you back." She fumbled to put her bra back on then attempted to locate the other items of clothing. "It's just O means it when she says she'll send Raven in. And Raven is not as bashful around naked women. In fact, it wouldn't surprise me if she tried to join in."

Lexa lifted a brow in surprise before scrambling for her clothing. As pretty as Raven was she wouldn't appreciate her presence in bed with them. Neither would Anya. Lexa laughed as she thought Anya would be capable of the same thing... Maybe they were meant for each other.


 

Chapter Text

 

As Lexa pulled her top on she stared in confusion at Clarke who was now fully clothed and shifting around in her crossed legged position on the bed. "Are you okay? You seem... restless."

Clarke rolled onto her belly and laid with her head in the covers; groaning in frustration. "It's just that... y'know... I didn't get to finish... and now all I can feel is this stupid want to have you back where you were before or finish it off myself but I know I can't because they're expecting us out there and now I'm just majorly horny and I can't fucking do anything about it!"

Lexa chuckled and moved to lay down next to her girlfriend; burying her head into her neck to kiss her. "It's fine, we can continue later. Maybe the coffee will help take your mind off it anyhow? Plus, we've skipped a meal and your stomach is making noises that are probably audible to the entire building. So food now, this," She gestured between the two of them. "later." She kissed Clarke's neck once more when Clarke lifted her face to reveal the cutest pout Lexa believed she had ever seen, then dropped her voice to a huskier tone as she continued. "But believe me, I definitely intend to finish what I started. " This time she bit the blondes neck, eliciting a moan before soothing over the bite with a gentle kiss at her pulse point. "Coffee now." Lexa announced, rising from the bed.

Groaning, Clarke buried her face into the covers once more and grumbled louder then before, feeling the annoying heat that would not subside from between her legs. "Ugh, fine." Finally giving in; she rose from the bed, narrowing her eyes at Lexa before following her through the door.

"Good morning my ray of sunshine!" Octavia sang from where the three girls sat at the small island in the kitchen.

"Fuck off." Clarke mumbled, taking a seat opposite them on one of the bar stools. As she sat she focused on crossing her legs as tightly as possible to relieve the damn sensation Lexa had left her with.

"Awhh I love you too." Octavia raised a hand to her heart.

Lexa sat beside her girlfriend and picked up the coffee in front of her; moaning as the warmth hit her lips. The moan had taken her by shock as much as it did the others, but she hadn't eaten or drank a thing in hours and it was better than sex. This didn't stop her blushing when she realized the others were staring at her wide eyed; even Octavia feeling a slight attraction for the girl who made the incredibly seductive noise she just heard. "If this is what you're like with a drink I hope you are buying a ball gag before Clarke does anything to you that could blow my eardrums." Octavia scrunched her nose up but distracted herself with the donut that sat in front of her; shoving half of it into her mouth. "See this is good," Spitting crumbs across the table as she tried to speak around the food, everyone recoiled in horror, arms raising to their face in hope of protecting themselves from the donut spray. "but I don't feel like it's giving me an orgasm." Octavia paused her chewing for a second and raised a finger. The donut is damn good. But not that good. "Yeah, nope," She finally swallowed the food to everyone's delight. "I mean it's sexual but I can control myself."

Lexa was now staring at Clarke whose jaw had stiffened and Legs shifted more tightly in their crossed position; clearly the moan had made her already apparent situation, slightly more noticeable. "You okay there babe?" Lexa slowly ran a hand up the girls leg, thankful that the island was there; allowing her to be a little more adventurous with just how high she brought it.

Narrowing her gaze in annoyance of the smug grin that resided on Lexa's face, Clarke's hips unconsciously shifted forward, seeking the touch of the brunettes hand. "I um, I'm just gonna go to the toilet real quick."

"Hurry up, your drink is getting cold dummy." Raven added, lunging for another donut.

She only nodded in response, moving to walk a little to keenly to the bathroom.

Minutes passed before Clarke returned and Lexa had to stop her jaw from dropping seeing the relived smirk on the flushed face of her girlfriend, as she sat back down in her seat. She totally just sorted herself out. Lexa gulped, she too was slightly turned on after their session but it had subsided mostly; that was until the images of Clarke in the bathroom... doing that... crept into her mind; making the heat all to noticeable. "You take almost as long to pee as Lex." Anya rolled her eyes at the feigned hurt on the brunettes face that was quickly replaced by a blush when Clarke rose a brow all to knowingly.

"Do I now?" She ran a hand up the inside of Lexa's leg; perfectly out of view of the others. "Huh."

Lexa bit her lip and picked up a donut, putting it in her mouth just as Clarke ran a hand along her center. The slight moan that escaped her simply made the others laugh this time. Wearing Clarke's sweatpants with the nice thin material was most definitely a bad idea. "You really need to learn to control yourself over your food and drink man." Octavia shook her head as she piled yet more food into her mouth, washing it down afterwards with the chocolate.

Lexa gritted her teeth as she spoke, focusing intently on very carefully announcing each word as Clarke continued the motions. "I just," She moved her gaze to Clarke and smirked. "guess I just needed it that bad."

Clarke glared at her and let her mouth fall open slightly before closing it and moving her attention to the drink in front of her. She lifted it to her mouth and tried not to laugh hearing Lexa cough loudly to conceal her gasp when Clarke dropped her hand inside the waistband to find that she had not put her underwear back on. Yep, definitely a mistake.

"So Clarke have you got everything prepared for the exhibition yet?" Octavia spoke, showering the girls sat before her once more with chunks of donut.

"Octavia CHEW AND SWALLOW before speaking you animal!" Rolling her eyes, Raven threw a napkin at her friend who was now scowling at her viciously, cheeks filled to the brim with cakey goodness.

"Sorry."

Clarke shifted in her seat a bit as she raised the coffee to her lips once more, her new position allowing her to rub circles against Lexa's sensitive spot. "Erm, yeah I'm pretty much all sorted. I got some drawing done earlier and I probably should get a couple more done but I'm on track. Think I'm just going to take the weekend off and draw a bit. Haven't got any essays due so it will be nice to relax."

"Any plans for the weekend Lexa?" Octavia swallowed this time before questioning the girl, bringing relief to those in front of her line of fire.

"Uhh," Clarke moved her eyes to look at her girlfriend. The brunettes cheeks were flushed and her green eyes now almost entirely consumed by black. The girls hips shifted slightly as Clarke continued to rub against her, unconsciously searching for more. "I uh think I'm just going to relax too." Lexa's voice broke on the last word, betraying her. Clarke grinned smugly at this waiting for Lexa to continue. "I was going to ask you Clarke if you wanted to do something? Movie day or we could binge watch sense8?" Clarke was slightly annoyed at just how well Lexa was keeping her cool at her touch and took it upon herself to dip two fingers deep into her center, grinning at the sharp intake of breath that came from the girl whose jaw was now slack, eyes wide as she anticipated her girlfriends next move.

The blonde didn't give it to her though. Instead; she kept her fingers still inside the girl, resisting the urge to move them in her wetness. "I'd love that." Clarke was staring longingly at Lexa, and although she had just relieved herself she needed Lexa to be the one to now that the heat was returning.

Octavia gagged at the sight of the two girls making sickly love eyes at one another. "Right, I want to go shopping, any of you guys wish to come with? I'm thinking maybe get some new bras, tank tops, maybe some more food?"

Raising her eyebrow to Anya at the mention of lingerie, Raven nodded. "I'm up for that. An?"

Nodding Anya stood with the other girls. "Sure why not. Lex, you and Clarke tagging along?"

"Uhh, I think were just gonna stay here for a bi-" Clarke curled her fingers within the girl whose walls contracted around her at the pleasurable motion. "For a bit." She breathed, shooting Clarke a daggered look.

Clarke simply smiled innocently, so much so Lexa feared her acting skills. "Yeah I'm pretty tired."

Anya nodded as she tried to restrain her laughter. "Of course... Tired."

"We'll bring back food so don't eat!" Octavia called over her shoulder as she herded the two girls out of the apartment. "Be safe!" She added; disappearing down the hallway with the others, laughing loudly.

"So, if you were serious about Sense8 I'd like to take you up on your plans to binge watch it. The trailers look insane." Clarke smirked slightly as she tried to pretend to not notice the fact her fingers still sat comfortably within her girlfriend.

Lexa narrowed her eyes taking Clarke's hand and pulling it out of her before lacing the wet fingers between her own as she trailed the blonde back to the bedroom; shutting the door behind her.

Lexa gently pushed her to the bed; Clarke gulping loudly as the gorgeous girl moved to straddle her. "Didn't anyone tell you it's rude to finger your girl at the table?" Swallowing again the golden locks swayed as she shook her head 'no'. "Maybe you should be taught then." The brunette bit her lip as she trailed her fingertips up along the girls thighs and then along her center; Clarke shuddering violently in response to her touch.

"And how would you go about that?" Her voice broke as Lexa wet her lips with her tongue, her hazel eyes traveling up the length of her girlfriends body in complete wonder.

"Well..." She moved from her position to sit by the blondes side, giggling at the groan of annoyance that turned into a gasp of pleasure as she removed Clarke's pants and underwear. "First," Lexa spread her girlfriends legs and knelt between them, dipping two fingers into her as slowly as she could bare- she wanted to tease the hell out of Clarke but teasing her was killing herself too, she already had enough pent up sexual tension within her to last a life time just from the events of the morning- she didn't need to add to her own lust anymore than bearable. "I'd get revenge for you being totally evil." She smiled at the sound of Clarke's moans as she curled her fingers upwards, moving them slowly in her wetness.

"If this is revenge I should be mean more often." The words came out breathy as Clarke tried not to moan too loudly between them- something she was failing greatly at.

"Then maybe I should rethink my tactics?" Lexa pulled the fingers out of her, smirking at the disgruntled groan that came from the woman before her.

Clarke narrowed her eyes, this was more than she could take. She wanted the beautiful girl in front of her. She needed her. "Lexa, please," She pleaded, not caring if her desperation was coming across to strongly; she wanted her to know how badly she craved this.

Seeing the want behind the blue eyes she gave in, moving slowly to kiss along the inside of Clarke's thigh before looking up to search her eyes for assurance. "Are you okay with this?" Clarke nodded, biting her lip in attempt to suppress the moan of pleasure that escaped her before Lexa's lips even met her. Seeing that she was okay, the brunette slowly began to run kisses along the girls center, warmth flooding between her own legs at the taste that met her mouth. It was salty and sweet, it was Clarke. Needing to taste more, she began to run her tongue up and down then changed to circular motions; settling back to vertical motions once she felt Clarke's hips bucking harder in approval.

She continued to taste her girlfriend for minutes, speeding up the movements before she heard Clarke's raspy voice above her. "Lex I need more." Lexa slowed down the movements teasing for a while. "Lexxx, I need you in me. Please baby?"

Lexa closed her eyes hearing the plea, needing her girlfriend as much as she needed her. She added two fingers as she continued the motions with her tongue, trying her best to ignore her own wetness at the blondes cries of pleasure and the sight before her as she grabbed the headboard with one hand, the other in Lexa's hair, willing her to go on.

"I- I'm so close Lex, so close-" Lexa felt the lust heat her core as Clarke's thighs tightened around her, her body convulsing as the brunette continued slowly, allowing her to ride out the orgasm. Lexa waited for Clarke's giggle to sound telling her she was done. "I don't mean to laugh I just... get a little sensitive after I'm done..."

Lexa smiled, running her tongue along her in one last long motion to get rid of the last of the wetness before moving up to kiss her. "You, taste, so, good." She mumbled between kisses, letting Clarke taste herself on her lips.

"Mmm, I wonder if you do too..." Clarke dipped her hand into the hem of the jogging bottoms eyes widening as she realized just how turned on Lexa was.

"Sorry, it's just, I've been waiting all morning... And hearing you come... I just..."

The blonde raised a finger to Lexa's lips to silence her, her other hand pulling out of Lexa's joggers before bringing the fingers to her lips, tasting the girl on them. "Mmm," She shut her eyes, appreciating the taste. Girls tasted damn good, Lexa, Lexa tasted fucking amazing. Meeting the dark eyes in front of hers she blushed suddenly realizing what she'd just done. "Sorry, I was just curious what you tasted like."

"And?"

"And," Clarke rolled so she was on top of her girlfriend. "these are coming off." She pulled Lexa's joggers and panties off before removing the brunettes shirt, followed by her own.

Clarke took a deep breath in, her exhale shaky as she tentatively ran a hand up Lexa's leg. "We don't have to do this Clarke, I'm fine to wait if you don't want to d-"

"No," She smiled at the girl shyly. "It's not that... I do... I really do, I just, Im not experienced in that department, y'know?"

Lexa kissed Clarke, biting her bottom lip gently before soothing over it with her tongue. "It's okay, we're both getting to know each others bodies," She took the blondes hand and guided her fingers into her center, exhaling as Clarke curled them within her. Hearing the breath; Clarke stilled, hoping to god she didn't just hurt her. "It's okay, I'm okay babe, you wont hurt me, I like it a little rough anyway." She continued to apply pressure to Clarke's wrist until the blonde took over, moving within her of her own accord.

After a while Lexa wrapped her legs around Clarke's back from where they both sat- their bodies intertwined as she moaned into the girls ear, smiling as this caused her to grow in confidence. Clarke picked up the pace and added her thumb to rub circles against Lexa's clit. "Clarke, don't stop!"

Clarke kissed along her girlfriends pulse point sucking hard as it elicited louder cries of pleasure, her free hand moving up to play with one of the girls nipples.

Lexa lent in, resting her head against Clarke's shoulder as she struggled to control her breathing. "Baby, I'm gonna come-"

Hearing those words leave her girlfriends mouth only spurred Clarke on to take Lexa over the edge, her back arching as she felt her release, glad when Clarke didn't stop but slowed her movements allowing her to enjoy it completely. "That, was amazing." Lexa collapsed back against the bed, trying to catch her breath.

"I know, wanna go again?" Giggling Clarke grinned cheekily at the raised eyebrow she got in response.

"Why the hell not?"