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constant

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before everything, loneliness was the one constant in nagisa’s life. looking back at it and remembering what he always read in his books, he realised that what he felt was aching loneliness, constantly gnawing at his heart. he had always been lonely, for as long as he could remember.

now, he had hiyori-kun, as well as ibara and jun. that faint sense of loneliness was still there, and will most likely always be a part of him, but most of it had been replaced by warmth and occasionally, a fuzzy and overwhelming feeling of… joy, in contrast to his regular feeling of cool blankness.

but he wouldn’t really call those new emotions, love and happiness, a constant. a constant was more like hiyori-kun, who had been there since he ‘became more human’. or like his storybooks, they had helped him understand so many more things.

that was until he learnt that ‘love’ wasnt just a feeling. it could be in a person and in his actions, multiple things. love could be anything. love was what hiyori-kun had shown him since they were young, with their conversations late at night. love was stored and hidden in the pages of a book, waiting to be discovered. love was what made him smile while practicing with eden. love was what was around him, and not just what was inside him.

then he realised, love was the constant in his life, and it had been since long ago, he just hadn’t realised it yet.