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What happens in J-Bad

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Mandy was sat hunched over with her head in her hands, yesterday she'd let herself fall apart over the latest name on her list, she could still hear his widows words ringing in her ears "You are the reason my husband is dead" the truth of it stabbed her in the heart. Too many names, too many damn names. She couldn't bring herself to cry over it anymore, it hurt too much. It made her head pound.

She was snapped out of her thoughts by a knock at her door, it was late. If it was important this time of night she would usually have got a call or a radio but she glanced at her phone, no calls.

Curious, she opened the door to find Jason stood there, he grabbed and held the door as it swung open, a look on his face that she recognised from a long time ago. A look that scared her and at the same time set her nerves alive with anticipation. His eyes were dark, staring straight into hers with need, determination, angst. She asked him if he was OK, with no expectation of a conversation, this was not the look of a man who wanted to talk. "I'm good" was all he could manage before he pushed forward, quickly closing the door behind him and pinning her to the wall while his lips met hers. If she was surprised her body didn't let-on because she responded instinctively, kissing him back hard, moving her hands to cup his face, loving the feel of his stubble on her.

Jason's arms leaned either side of her, encasing her, surrounding her. From the look on his face before she had expected his hands on her body, urgency. But instead he kept his forearms on the wall steadying himself, instead he kissed her like she was the only water in the desert, kissed her like she was making him whole again. She was breathless from the kiss, but more so from trying to wrap her head around what this was. This was a booty call, this was a distraction, surely. So why did this feel like something else?

She moved her hands through his hair and knotted them behind Jason's neck, pulling him in closer so she could feel his firm body flush against her. He let out the faintest low growl at this new contact with her body, feeling her pull him in closer was all the permission he needed to slide his hands down the wall and to her waist, slipping his hands under the hem of her t-shirt. He broke their kiss, grudgingly, taking the moment to pull the material over her head and then resting his mouth at her ear, his fingers teasing the skin at her waist and back. "I need you" he whispered as he pulled back to face her, his face suddenly desperate, pleading. "We need this"

He knew she needed something from him, some spoken reason for "why?" or "why now?", and he didn't have that answer. This was all the explanation he had for her. That he needed her. That he knew she needed him too.

"Take me" Mandy replied, simply, breathless. It wasn't just an offer to take her body, she was offering up what solace he could take, she was taking what comfort she could take from him too. Two broken people offering up what little they had to offer in that moment.

Jason kissed her once more on the mouth, a deep and lingering kiss before trailing his mouth down her neck. Mandy let out a moan, her hands grabbing at his jacket, lowering the zip, it was her turn to move her fingers under the hem of his t-shirt underneath, she pulled his it higher and pushed his jacket to his shoulders. "Take them off" she murmured, and she felt Jason smile against her as he continued to ignore her and kiss her further down her collar bone sliding her bra strap off her shoulder replacing it with gentle bites and licks. "Now" she repeated as he laughed against her chest and replied "so bossy" as he pulled back, letting his jacket slip off his shoulders onto the floor then lifting his t-shirt over his head.

Mandy took advantage of him stepping back slightly to drink him in and trail her fingers over his broad shoulders and down his body. More scars than the last time she'd seen him up-close this way, her hands lingered on the newer ones, surprised that she knew each one from their history together, every injury, every scar, every time she'd forced him to sit still in the infirmary when he wouldn't listen to the nurse.

"I remember this one" she runs her hand over an older scar, "this one would have healed much better if you'd let the doctor spend the time on your stitches" she teased.

"You remember that, then you remember what I told the Dr too?" Jason pulled her close to him again kissing her neck and letting his hands roam her back

"Chicks dig scars" Mandy half laughed, half moaned as Jason found a sensitive spot on her shoulder and nipped it with his teeth while his hand had slipped inside her bra and was doing just the right things to make her crazy.

She'd forgotten how her body responded to him. Forced herself to put it out of her mind, because if she'd let herself remember how crazy-good they were together, she'd have craved more of it. Jason Hayes was a heady drug to kick and here she was losing herself in him again after all these years sober, as she felt his hand dip low to unfasten her jeans, his other hand circling and teasing her nipple, now his hand inside her jeans, taking her to the verge of bliss.

Jason was face to face with her now, watching her while he made her come apart with his hands. His eyes on her were too much, her eyes revealed too much to him, she moaned and leaned her head back against the wall her eyelids heavy, his mouth now on her neck, whispering "come for me Mandy, let it all go" he nipped at her neck again and did something wonderful with his fingers that sent her over the edge and falling wave after wave, gripping hard to Jason's bare shoulders for dear life.

Jason was lost in the scent of Mandy Ellis. The feel of her skin, the way she responded to his kiss, to his touch. the sounds she made that made his cock hard. He breathed her in at her neck, no fancy perfume, but it was the unmistakable scent of her. After that first time, it had lingered on him, even after changes of clothes and showers, after ops in the sand and dirt, even after other women there were days it hit his senses and he was back there in that moment that they promised would never happen again.

But here they were, years later, hanging onto each other again like their lives depended on it. Hanging on for something to ease the hurt that was coursing through them both. Her nails gripping his shoulders was the best kind of pain, something real.

It wasn't just the way she responded to him, it was how his body set on fire just from looking at her, it was the way she looked at him and saw right thought him but didn't question or expect anything. She just got it. She got him. It broke his heart to see her crushed today, to see the toll this war has had on her. And now he wanted to ease some of her pain in the only way he knew how to, here in this god forsaken sandpit. By making her forget everything inside that always-thinking head of hers for a while, making her forget everything that hurt inside. At least for a while.

When Jason woke it was still dark, he was wrapped around a sleeping Mandy, his arm around her waist, the back of her head tucked into his chest. The sight of Mandy sleeping made him smile, she didn't sleep a lot or sleep well, he knew that. They had lost themselves in each others bodies for the best part of the night before finally collapsing into sleep. He wasn't sure whether it was all the energy they'd exerted that had sent her into such a deep sleep or whether him being there with her somehow calmed her. Either was fine by him. She needed the sleep.

The feel of her body flush against him, the sight of his legs wrapped over her naked body had his cock hardening again, memories of last night flooding his mind. He moved his fingers at her waist, so tempted to stroke her skin, to wake her gently with his touch, to fall into sleepy morning sex with her. He wanted to, but he couldn't.

Mandy was so tired that he was able to untangle himself enough to sit himself up on one arm on his side stretching slightly without waking her. These beds were only made for one so he stretched carefully trying not to fall out, moving himself to sit himself on the edge. He looked around again at Mandy sleeping, watching her breathe so easily, the weight of the world temporarily lifted from her shoulders. He reached out to sweep her hair out of her face, she stirred a little but carried on sleeping.

There were things about Mandy Ellis that he knew for sure; She took his breath away, in every way possible. She was probably the person who knew him best, even more than his brothers, than his own flesh and blood. And most of all he knew for sure that she deserved so much better than this broken frogman could give her.

He dressed quietly, wanting to get back to his hooch early, before anyone woke and before tongues started wagging. For her sake rather than him, it was different for a woman in her position, for an outsider working closely with them all trust was everything. She didn't need any more gossip and god knows navy men could gossip worse than their wives. He wasn't oblivious to the things people said about him and Mandy. Never in his own team though, they all respected Mandy too much and feared Jason's wrath too much to even dare.

But people talked, despite how they had kept things between them focused on work, despite how they had fought against their own needs for years because they were professionals. But it was impossible to hide chemistry, even chemistry that's being kept carefully under control. He'd wanted to punch a few people in the face over the years for things he'd heard said, but he knew that would just draw more attention and cause her more problems.

Sound travelled in the desert, Mandy's cabin was far enough from the teams quarters and everyone else of importance, but he smiled thinking about how he'd had to crush his mouth to hers to muffle her cries more than once last night. He gave his head a shake, before he could be tempted to climb back in and make her cry out like that again.

Leaning over to give her a kiss on the cheek, Mandy slowly opened her eyes and turned towards him noticing he was dressed. "Walk of shame sailor?" she smiled. Jason laughed, his heart momentarily tightening at the sight of a half-asleep smiling Mandy Ellis tangled in last nights sheets.

He sat back down on the bed as he leaned in to kiss her on the lips, lingering there, trying to convey something. What, he wasn't sure… That he was sorry, that she was amazing, that this wasn't a distraction, that he was broken, that they'd always be OK?

When he sat back, they locked eyes and something passed between them. An unspoken agreement, a resignation to the reality that came with nearly-morning. That they had been here before, that this was the last time. She reached out to put her hand over his and they smiled at each other, a little sadly. She understood and Jason wondered what it was she read in his face. Knowing Mandy, she probably read it all. He hoped she read it all. Hoped she saw the things he had no words for.

Jason took the sheets, straightening them out a bit and putting them back over her properly. "Get some more sleep" he said as he pushed her fringe from her face as she shut her eyes.

He watched Mandy fall back into sleep as he shut the door behind him and slipped into the darkness, back to his hooch, back to reality.

Ignore and override, but it was hard to ignore that his bed felt as cold and empty as the early morning desert that surrounded him.