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Written in the Stars

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Finn loved his soulmates, he had his whole life. 

Sometimes he would think back on the day he first found their names etched on his body; the light pink letters appearing like thin scares in his skin. He was young but Finn remembered it so very clearly. It was one of the most important days in his life, it changed everything. It was one of those memories that Finn refused to let  slip away. He held it close to his heart, playing it over and over again until it had forged deep pathways in his brain. 

He just remembered looking down and finding their names on his hip, then tracing his fingertips over the lines as countless  thoughts jumbled in his mind. Question after question cycled through his brain until they began clambering over each other, until Finn didn't even know what to think anymore. He remembered just becoming so overwhelmed by the confusion that he ran to his brother’s room in a panic and showed him the names resting just above his hip bone. He remembered the way Alex laughed before he explained why the names had suddenly appeared in his skin.

“Those are the names of your soulmates,” his brother grinned, “look, I have names too.” He reached down and rolled up the leg of his sweatpants revealing two names that curled around his leg like a snake slithering its way up. The letters were light pale even in comparison to his brother's fair skin but if you knew where to look they were clear as day.

“What are soulmates?” Finn asked, as Alex let his sweats fall back into place. 

His brother took a deep breath pondering how to word his answer before finally responding, “Soulmates, are people that for some reason the universe has decided are going to be perfect for you.” 

Finn just looked at his brother with his brows furrowed in confusion, “what do you mean?”

“Well, when we’re older we all have people in our lives that are important to us for a variety of reasons. But these people are gonna be very special to you, and you to them. And these ones,” Alex absentmindedly ran a hand over his leg right where the names of his soulmates were hidden, “these ones will be special to me.” 

“Special how?” 

His brother chuckled a bit at that, “you know Fish, I don't really know yet. I guess it kinda depends on them. Who they are, and what they want. So, I don't know yet but,” Alex let his voice drop to a soft whisper, “ but I sure am excited to find out.”  

*** 

That day may have been the first time Finn learned about his soulmates but it was far from the last he thought about them. In all honesty they never strayed too far from his thoughts. It was odd, no matter how much his mind wandered, the names in his skin were always there. They were constant, grounding, they would lead him back like the gentle prod of a shepherd's crook, bringing him into the lush green pastures of promised happiness. 

He loved them, those names. The way the letters curled and curved, the beautiful differences in each of them. Finn wanted to know them, he dreamed of the day he would meet his soulmates and find out what “special” would mean for him. 

He remembered the day Alex told him that he had met his soulmates. It was his first Christmas home after joining the Rangers and after his dramatic welcome home from their parents, Alex excitedly pulled Finn to the side.

“Guess what Fishy?” Alex asked him with a bright grin. 

Finn simply rolled his eyes at the nickname but still responded with a, “what?” 

“I found them.” 

For just a second Finn's heart skipped a beat, he had found them ? As in his soulmates? 

“Wait, seriously?” He asked in an excited rush. 

“Look,” Alex leaned down to pull up his pant leg and where before had simply been the names long since turned black marking Alex’s soulmates having turned eighteen, there was now a beautiful image. A golden beach dusted in silver snow, hidden within the curling waves was her name Natalie , and drifting amongst the snowflakes was his, Kasey

Finn was happy for his brother, he really was. He had finally found his special people. But despite the happy excitement as he hugged his brother Finn was also green with envy. He wanted his people, he wanted to hold them close and make them happy. Finn wanted to be happy. 

Little did he realize that it would be years before he would meet either of them, and years more before they would get to claim that utterly ambiguous feeling of happy as their own. 

*** 

The first time Finn met Logan, his heart stopped. 

He had known one of the new freshmen was supposed to start rooming with him but nothing could have prepared him for the man that stepped foot into his dorm room that day. Logan was beautiful; with lush evergreen forest in his eyes perfect for Finn to get utterly lost in. The sheer strength running through every muscle and sinew of his body nearly made Finn's mouth water at the sight. His fingers ached to touch that tan skin just to see if it was as soft and smooth as it looked, dark curls fluffed out from under the rim of his snapback and Finn so wanted to bury his hands in them 

There was a good twenty seconds of silence before Finn realized he hadn’t actually said anything to the man standing in his doorway. A bright embarrassed flush burned to life in his cheeks at the little amused smirk pulling at those plush lips. 

“Oh um, sorry,” Finn said, shaking his head, “come on in, I assume you're the new roommate?” He stepped out of the walkway to let the other man in, “I’m Finn by the way.” 

“Yeah,” he said stepping into the small room, “I’m Logan.” 

Finn tripped over his feet. He scrambled to catch himself on the dresser nearest him making the junk on top clatter. 

“You ok over there man?” Logan asked, turning to smirk at Finn's clumsiness. 

“Y-yeah- umm…yeah i’m good,” Finn stammered regaining his footing, “you… you said your name is Logan?” he asked, having a hard time believing that the beautiful man currently tossing his bags onto the open bed shared the same name as one of his soulmates.  

“Yes, you got a problem with that?” he said, giving Finn a challenging look, like he was just daring Finn to pick a fight with him. 

Finn blinked, thrown by Logan's reaction to this whole thing, his utter indifference to Finn’s own name. Suddenly he was filled to the brim with insecurities. What if this wasn't his Logan. What if it was a mistake? Finn had been down that path once before thinking he had found one of his soulmates but it had ended in him being left, alone and used and full of heartache. He never wanted to feel that again.

“Nope, no problem at all,” Finn shook his head trying to clear away the thoughts. 

“Good,” Logan said plopping down on his bed next to his bags, “wouldn't want to have a problem now would we.” 

Finn laughed at that, he was finding Logan’s somewhat ornery attitude to be entertaining, “you know, I think we're gonna be good friends Lo.” 

“Lo? We’ve known each other for less than five minutes and you’re already giving me nicknames?’ 

“Like I said, good friends,” Finn smirked. 

Logan just laughed and rolled his eyes, “I have a feeling you might be right about that.”

*** 

And right Finn was. He and Logan quickly became closer than any friend Finn had had in the past. They spent nearly every day together, on the ice, in class, sleeping merely feet apart. And each day Finn fell a little more in love with his best friend; the way he would play his guitar for a few minutes each night before bed, the way he would scrunch up his face studying for a test, the way he would wander out of bed at two in the morning only to come back with a plate of pizza rolls to eat in the dark. Finn fell in love with Logan’s every little quirk, he fell in love with his snarky fearless nature, he fell in love with the way he would pretend to be completely careless and confident even though he was really kinda quiet once he was comfortable. 

As he was distracted falling in love Finn failed to realize that they were burning through their time together at lightning speed. They spent their time partying, and studying, and playing hockey, and before he knew it Finn was hauling his duffle bag through the yard of the frat house, for the beginning of his senior year. 

A bunch of their teammates were already there, and seemed to have started a water fight on the grass. 

“Logan! Think fast!” someone shouted before chucking a water balloon just past where Finn was standing. He turned at the sound of the balloon splashing as it burst open, soaking his friend. Finn grinned at the sight, Logan was wearing a thin white shirt and a pair of loose faded jeans, his soft curls tucked up underneath a burgundy snapback. He let his gaze trail up and down Logan's body taking in the way the wet shirt clung to each strong muscle almost obscenely until his eyes caught sight of a black mark just at his collarbone. Looking a bit closer Finn felt his heart stop. It was hard to read through his shirt but sure as day he could see the dark letters of his own name etched into the skin just under the thin material.

“Thanks man,” Logan chuckled, rolling his eyes at his friend before finally looking up to see Finn standing there, his eyes locked on the mark at his collarbone. Realizing almost instantly what Finn was seeing, Logan slapped his hand up covering the mark before quickly shouldering past both Finn and their other teammates and running into the house. 

Finn blinked in shock, he had always wondered, ever since that very first day whether Logan was his Logan or not. He couldn't bring himself to ask though, Logan had made a very big point to keep his soulmark covered at all times and he had never made any comment about Finns own mark that he had almost pointedly made visible at times hoping to get Logan’s attention but he had never reacted with more than a soft sigh. Finn snapped out of his thoughts at the feeling of one of their friends spraying him with the hose. He laughed before quickly making his way up to their room only a moment or two after Logan. 

“Were you ever planning to tell me?” he asked, letting the door fall shut behind him. 

“Honestly,” Logan sighed, pulling his sopping shirt off, he let his fingers softly trace over the dark letters of his Finn's name scrawled across his collarbone in Finn’s own small neat handwriting, “no, no I wasn't.” 

Finn watched mesmerized as Logan's fingers then moved to touch the name of the man they had yet to meet, Leo. They were the exact same letters as the ones on Finn’s hip, still pale witten in cramped cursive, slanted into an almost illegible string of loops. 

But why ?” Finn asked, his heartache breaking the quiet of their tiny dorm. 

“Because it doesn't change anything,” he whispered back. 

“Lo, it changes everything,” Finn said, taking a step closer to his friend. 

He couldn't help but think back to that day Alex told him what the names carved into his hip meant, when he told him about the people that would be special to him, his soulmates. After that day Finn had become a little obsessed, he had spent hours learning to analyze handwriting trying desperately to reveal a hint in the letters that would bring him closer to the people he would one day get to love. 

“I’ve spent my entire life falling in love with the letters of your name,” he whispered, taking another step closer to Logan. “Each and every one, the little curl in the way you write your ‘L’ the flourish in the ‘N’” Finn raised his hand to touch the letters at his hip that he had looked at so many times he could see them with his eyes closed. “I’ve fallen in love with how you write it a little crooked, maybe from hurting your hand when you were younger. Lo you can’t tell me that doesn’t matter.” 

“It was my wrist,” Logan whispered, taking a step back only to feel his legs hit the edge of his bed, “I fell playing with my sisters and broke it, it never quite healed right.” he looked up at Finn, breath catching at the intensity in his eyes, “And I didn’t say it didn’t matter, I said it didn’t change anything. Finn we can’t... what we do and who we want to be... people can’t know.” 

Finn took a shaky breath and another step forward, now barely inches away from Logan, “well...” he looked around their room pointedly, “there’s no one here to see us now. Just you and me.” 

Logan swallowed hard and looked up into Finn's warm eyes, “it- it can’t leave this room. Not ever. Would you… would you be ok with that?” 

Finn paused for a moment, on one hand Logan was right there , but on the other he also knew that the sanctuary of their dorm was fleeting, only a blip in their lives. The thought of only having these few hidden moments made him devastatingly sad, but if that was all Logan would let him have, he had to take it. 

“Alright, it won’t leave this room,” Finn finally answered.

With that Logan reached out, pulling Finn towards him until their bodies were pressed flush together. They kissed with a deep passion that made Finn feel like his very insides were melting. Finn never wanted Logan to take his lips off his own; he wanted to feel him, taste him, drown in the press and pull and the bite of his kiss. A high whine caught in Finn’s throat when Logan pushed him back until he fell back against the bed, the old springs creaking beneath them. 

The two of them made love that night. They let the heat of each other's bodies scorch into their very souls, they savored the burning between them because neither knew if they’d ever get to feel it again. They moved together slow and tender, feeling each other as much as they possibly could. Logan was in his lap, their foreheads pressed together as they breathed each other's air, he tightened his fingers Finn's hair and sighed his name with each thrust. Finn just wanted to close his eyes and bask in the feeling of being inside his soulmate but he didn't want to look away from how beautiful Logan was, his mouth open gasping for breath, eyes pinched closed in pleasure. 

As Finn watched Logan’s head fall back lost in the feeling of it he noticed movement at his collar bone as his mark began to change. A beautiful silver and gold filigree design swirled to life around the dark letters of his own name, they only stopped when they reached the still pale letters of their third soulmate. 

“Look, Lo...” Logan glanced down to see Finn tracing his fingers over the new design now decorating his collarbone. “It’s proof, I was meant to be yours...” 

Logan looked away with a sad sigh, “If only I could actually have you.”

When the two of them were done Finn held Logan tight in his arms loving the way he tucked his face into his neck. Finn didn’t want even an inch between them, he was so scared that the moment he loosened his grip Logan would slip out of his arms forever. 

“Have you...” Logan started hesitantly, “have you met anyone who might be... Leo ?” 

Finn took a breath and ran a palm down Logan’s strong back, “I thought so, once when I was younger. But... it wasn’t him. You know, I’ve spent so much time thinking about you and him trying to figure who you could possibly be. Like, he’s younger than us but he writes in cursive. Who writes in cursive nowadays?” Logan huffed a laugh against his neck. “I’ve looked for you two in every person I’ve ever met. Like there’s this split second of anticipation before someone tells me their name that I can’t help but hope .”

Logan simply trailed his hand down Finn's body to trace over the short cursive letters on his hip. 

After that night Finn kept his word, he didn’t so much as touch Logan outside their dorm room. But inside that small sacred space... Finn worshiped him. He savored every kiss, every touch, every moment right up until their very last one. 

But before he knew it, it was time. Finn was leaving, he had been draft to the Gryffindor Lions. He had known from the start that their time spent in that room was limited but he hadn’t thought it would fly by so quickly. Finn fiddled with the strap of his backpack, the last bag to be loaded in his car. 

“I guess this is it,” he said, pausing by the closed door and turning to look at the man standing by his side. “Can I?” He asked, reaching out towards Logan, “just one last time?” 

Logan sighed, there was a sheen of tears in his eyes as he nodded and let Finn pull him into his arms. A little sob caught in Finn’s throat at the feeling of Logan’s lips and knowing it would be the last time he would get to feel them.

“Logan,” he whispered, hand coming up to rest on his collarbone right over his soul mark, “I love you.” 

Logan made a slightly pained noise, “don’t say that.” 

Finn sniffled a little, “I have to. This is my last chance. I love you so fucking much, and I don’t want to step outside that door. Let all of this end.” 

“Finn, you knew what this was before we started.” 

“I know, and I followed your rule, but Logan it feels like my heart is tearing in two. You're my soulmate and my soul is breaking apart at the thought of never getting to love you.” 

“I’m sorry Finn,” Logan whispered as he reached behind him and opened the door to their dorm room. Finn felt a tear leak down his face as he watched Logan step backwards over the threshold, step backwards out of their dorm, step out of the haven they had created, finally ending their time together. “Good luck in Gryffindor,” he whispered, a little waver in his voice.

“Goodbye, Lo,” Finn sniffled and walked out. He only made it a few miles down the road before the tears were blurring his vision too much to drive. 

*** 

The weeks following that last emotional day with Logan, Finn would remember as some of the hardest of his entire life. His heart felt raw as an exposed nerve, aching with hurt and loneliness, but he couldn't focus on that. No, instead he did his very best to push away the thoughts of Logan and focus on work, he poured every ounce of strength and focus in his body into practice. He would wake up and run himself into the ground until he was utterly exhausted only to fall asleep and repeat the next day. 

It went on like that for months. He hid it from the rest of the team, his friends, he pretended to be his happy, chaotic self. He tried so very hard to make sure that no one knew that his heart had been shredded to ribbons. Eventually, Finn just accepted that this hurt inside him was his new normal and there’s nothing he could do to change it. 

When he heard the news that Logan was coming to Gryffindor, Finn could barely believe it. His heart soared with hope, painting wishful pictures in his mind about the possibilities, how happy they could be together but it all hinged on Logan taking that first step. It wasn’t long before reality came crashing down on him, smashing his hope to pieces and ripping open the festering wounds on Finn's heart. 

Logan moved in with Dumo. He refused to acknowledge what the two of them had shared back in that crappy dorm room, he simply pretended that the red string tying their hearts together didn't exist. To Logan they were simply ‘friends’ and that's all they would ever be, and it hurt. It hurt Finn so very much to reluctantly accept that Logan would never let him truly be his soulmate. 

Eventually, the two of them settled back into their roles as best friends and Finn hated it. He hated being so very close to his soulmate but not able to be close to him. It felt like his heart would shatter anew each time he would see that blindingly beautiful smile or those eyes such a deep peaceful green, but Logan had made his decision very clear he didn't want his soulmate, he didn't want a partner, he didn't want love. And despite the pain Finn would respect that. 

It was rare, but every once in a while Finn would feel someone's eyes on him, watching, taking in his every move and when he would look up it was to find burning emerald eyes bright as a flame. Finn would find Logan drinking him in like a dying man wandering through the desert and stumbling upon an oasis. He couldn't hide the way his breath would catch at the sight of Logan softly tracing his fingers over the silver and gold swirls of his soulmark resting just under the collar of his t-shirt. Finn lived for these moments, they filled him with a sickening hope that maybe Logan would finally accept the love he desperately wanted to give him. That hope would quickly be crushed to dust when Logan would look away the moment he realized Finn had caught him watching.

***  

It was a pretty normal night the next time Finn felt his heart stop. He was out to dinner with some of the team, honestly tuning out most of the conversation as he picked at his meal; far too preoccupied with thoughts of Logan’s eyes burning into him to actually care about what everyone was talking about. 

But then he heard it… Leo.

Finn nearly choked on a sip of water “I’m sorry who? What are you guys talking about?” he asked after finally expelling the water from his lungs. 

“Leo, you know the new rookie goalie? Have you not been listening at all?” Kasey teased throwing a balled up napkin at his face. 

Finn tried to laugh and pretend that just the sound of that name hadn’t shaken him to his very core. 

“I guess I’m a bit distracted tonight, so what about Leo ?” God he loved the way the name felt on his tongue. 

“Hmm, we were just saying it sucks he has to stay in a hotel for his rookie year. Usually, Dumo takes in the new guys but it doesn’t seem like Tremzy is leaving anytime soon. It sounded like they tried to convince some of the other guys to take him in but no one really has the room.” 

“He can stay with me!” Finn shouted before he could stop himself. The rest of the table blinked at him in surprise as Finn himself processed what he just said. “I mean I have a free room, and I don’t mind taking the noobie in.” 

“Well...” Kasey kinda chuckled “I guess that takes care of that.”

A couple days later Finn opened his front door only to find the embodiment of sunshine standing in his threshold grinning at him like Finn was the most important person in the world. Fuck , he thought to himself basking in Leo’s radiant glow, I’m done for.

“Hey there,” Leo said, shooting Finn a dimpled smile, his thick southern accent as sweet as honeysuckle. “Thanks for taking me in, I appreciate it. I wasn’t really looking forward to calling a hotel room home for the next couple months.” There was a little nervous waver in Leo’s voice as he stood in the doorway. 

Finn mentally shook himself when he realized he had yet to say anything, “Ah, yeah no problem. Come on in, make yourself at home.” 

Leo settled into Finn's life surprisingly easily. It was only a matter of days before the two of them were completely comfortable in each other's company, they worked together forming new routines, new habits, accommodating the others needs with barely a thought. It felt like they were orbiting around each other, two celestial bodies sharing the same inky black sky creating their own light to nurture the wolds held in their gravity. Finn smiled at the thought, he couldn't help but wonder if one day they would collide creating a ripple in the universe that would change the very nature of the world they lived in.  

The first day Leo officially joined a Lions practice Finn could barely keep his eyes on the puck. Something about the way the younger man easily stopped every single shot, the effortless way he moved in the goal, and those lightning quick reflexes made Finn's insides squirm. He couldn’t help but wonder what it would feel like to be touched by hands that sure and skilled. Would they be gentle with him, would Leo’s touch be soft and sacred? Or would those hands be rough against his skin, would they explore without hesitation mapping his body like an ancient seafair charting the endless oceans? 

“Look alive O’Hara!” Coach shouted at him from the bench. 

Finn stumbled over his own skates, as he startled back to reality. A hot flush burned to life up the back of his neck when he realized he had just been fantasizing about his new roommate during practice. Shaking his head Finn tried to push all thoughts of Leo out of his mind, which ended up easier said than done when he spotted a little smirk half hidden behind the cage of the goaltender mask. 

If Finn had thought it was hard keeping his eyes off of Leo on the ice once they were in the locker room it was akin to tourture. It felt nearly impossible to tear his eyes away from Leo and those mile long legs of his, all that beautiful sun kissed skin that he hoped would taste like honey under his tongue. Just as he was pulling on a pair of faded blue jeans Finn spotted the blond wandering from the showers a towel slung low around his waist, that’s when he saw it. A long black strip of KT tape running down the length of Leo’s spine. 

It wasn’t uncommon. Honestly, it was pretty normal for people to keep the names of their soulmates covered for the sake of their own and their partners' privacy. Finn himself even had his mark covered when he was in public, but even still he couldn’t help the disappointed drop of his stomach when he didn't see his own name scrawled on Leo’s body.

Come on man, not this again, Finn thought, shaking his head with a deep sigh. Forcing his eyes away from Leo’s back Finn brought his hand to rest on his hip, somehow he always found that little action comforting. Instead of simply staring hopelessly at that long strip of tape Finn let his gaze drift to each of his teammates' various soulmarks.  

They settled first on Kasey, Finn’s stomach lurched as a pang of envy rushed through him. Kasey had two, each one curved on either side of his belly button, and though the names covered Finn knew exactly who was written into his friend's skin. The stunning silver and gold Celtic knotwork that stretched across his stomach and pelvis quashed any doubt that Finn may have had about it. Sometimes it was a bit strange sharing a team with his brother's soulmate. Most of the time Finn would just let himself forget about it but then every once in a while Kasey would mention Alex and he would remember as his insides began to coil tight with jealousy. Huffing a frustrated sigh, Finn looked away from Kasey too. 

Sirius’s mark was on the nape of his neck, covered by tape, he wondered who’s name was hidden there. James on the other hand was one of the few that proudly left his mark uncovered, letting the entire world see Lily’s name written in pretty golden loops on his neck, a beautiful silver flower blooming around it. Dumo also chose to leave his mark uncovered. Celeste, her name was written in an almost illegibly messy scrawl on his bicep and encircled by golden filigree. 

Finn wished he could do that, leave his mark uncovered, proudly telling the world that he loved the people whose names were etched into his skin. But it wasn’t his place to force Logan or Leo to do the same, they deserved the right to tell people in their own time.

***

As the days passed Finn couldn’t help but fall deeply in love with his new roommate. Leo was just so very sweet and kind and funny, he positively radiated a warm comfort that Finn found himself impossibly drawn to. 

Day after day Finn fought back the urge to touch him, to pull him into his arms in the kitchen and slow dance to the music of Leo’s laughter. He fought back the urge to crawl into Leo’s lap and bury his face in his neck, desperate to just hold him close until the horrible ache inside him eased away. God, he wanted those large palms to soothe up and down his body so much it almost hurt. What Finn wouldn't do to simply reach out and guide Leo’s touch directly to his chest, what Finn wouldn't do to get him to cradle his bleeding heart, cup as gently as if he were holding a tulip fragile and fresh from the earth while it beat in palms. 

A few weeks after Leo began sharing his space Finn wandered into the kitchen only to find him sitting at the table hand moving quickly over a piece of paper writing something. He knew he shouldn't snoop but Finn couldn't stop himself from peaking at the paper only to feel a deep ache settle in his chest at the sight of looping cursive letters. 

“You write in cursive,” the words fell from his lips on a hushed breath, as he stopped in his tracks instantly recognizing the familiar handwriting. 

“Hmm,” Leo looked up from his paper to find Finn standing there with a horribly sad look in his eyes, “oh yeah... I do.” 

 “You know,” Finn started, doing his best to shake away the aching feeling as he pulled out a chair and sat down next to him, “it’s kinda rare nowadays.” 

Leo huffed a little laugh and set his pen down, “yeah, yeah it is. I actually used to get in trouble for it at school cause the teachers could barely read it.” 

“How come then?” he blurted out  the question that had been niggling at his brain since the first time he noticed the way the letters of Leo’s name had looped together on his skin. 

Leo smiled softly at him, “My Nana taught me. It was kinda our thing .” 

Finn tilted his head a bit to the side, waiting for Leo to continue. 

“When I was little, we used to write each other these long ol’ letters about everything, and nothing,” Leo fiddled with the edge of the paper in front of him, hissing softly when it gave him a tiny papercut. “She used to tell me stories about her ‘pen pal’ from way back when, back when she was younger. She told me how much she missed talking to them. So, naturally I told her I’d be her pen pal.” Leo laughed at his younger self, “And it’s funny, I probably spent nearly eighty percent of my life at my grandparents house, but we would still do the whole thing of writing out the letters and sending them via snail mail, and I loved it.” Leo paused for a moment, seemingly caught up in a memory, “That was how I told her about everything important in my life, it was how I told her… about me.” Leo ran his thumb over the thin rainbow braid at his wrist before looking up at Finn with a sad little smile, “my Nana passed away a couple years ago but… I still write her letters. I still tell her about what's happening in my life, the things I'm doing, the people I meet,” he shot a quick wink at Finn with that last statement, and he couldn't stop the blush that crept up his neck in response. 

 “Le, that's so sweet,” Finn whispered, desperately wanting to reach out and press his hand into Leo’s shoulder, he desperately wanted to reach out and comfort him but the distance between them was so very much more than just the wooden planks of Finn’s kitchen table. No, the distance between them stretched far as the Atlantic Ocean all the way to the Pacific, from coast to sparkling coast. “I’m really sorry about your Nana,” Finn finally said in lieu of reaching out. 

“It’s alright, it’s a part of life,” Leo said with a shrug. “And besides, I know she still gets ‘em, I know she’s still proud of me.” 

Finn felt his heart warm at Leo’s words. God, he was already falling so hard for this man with the sunshine hair and ocean eyes, and heart made of pure gold.

After that conversation Finn and Leo settled into an easy, comfortable relationship. They let themselves fall into the expected roles; friends, roommates, teammates. But if they were being honest with themselves both of them knew that there was something else there, something underneath, a magnetic pull charged with the knowledge that their destinies were concealed by a strip of cloth tape less than a millimeter thick. 

Finn had yet to see Leo without it running up and down his spine, and ever since Logan he had kept his own mark carefully hidden, sickened by the thought of exposing their connection without Logan's consent. 

***

The months spent with Leo passed slow as Sahara sand dunes but Finn savored every single moment, cherishing them almost reverently. Honestly, he loved the simplicity of just existing together, he loved watching a movie on their couch Leo’s cold toes tucked under his thigh, he loved reading in a warm comfortable silence. And Finn loved the way Leo’s seemed to have filled up his house with sunshine making it feel more like a home than it ever had before. 

One day Finn wandered into the kitchen only to find Leo elbow deep in sudsy water scrubbing at dishes, a common enough sight but today it made Finn’s heart fill with a burning affection. It felt so domestic, Leo standing there in only a pair of loose basketball shorts and socks, that black tape still running the length of his back as he swayed his hips a little to country music filtering through the speaker next to him. God, Finn just wanted to sidle up behind him and wrap his arms around Leo’s middle, press his forehead into the dip between his strong shoulder blades right where he desperately hoped his name was etched. He wanted to feel Leo’s whole body relax under his touch until it was Finn’s strength holding him up. 

He didn't do that though, how could he? It wasn't his place to hold Leo like that no matter how much he wished it was. Instead, Finn hopped up to sit on the counter, snagging an apple from the fruit bowl next to him mostly just to have something to fiddle with, not because he actually wanted it. 

Apparently, the entirety of Finn’s self control was used to stop himself from snuggling against Leo’s back because before he could think better of it he blurted out, “How come you keep it covered?”

“Hmm?” Leo hummed, looking up at Finn, he had a little confused wrinkle formed between his eyebrows but his smile was still warm and soft.

“Your mark,” Finn clarified nodding at Leo’s back, “Like I can get wanting to keep it away from the media or strangers, but even when you’re home you keep it covered.” 

Leo huffed a laugh as the confusion faded from his face, he shut off the sink and grabbed a towel to wipe away the suds still clinging to his hands and forearms.

“Well,” he said, turning to lean back against the sink, “you keep yours covered too don't you?” 

“Er… yeah, I guess I do,” Finn said, feeling heat creep up his neck, he hadn't really thought about his own covered mark when blurting the question. “But I mean, that’s really more for someone else. If I could do things my way, I’d show the whole world the name’s of my soulmates, the people I get to love more than anything.” 

Leo sighed softly, taking a step away from the sink towards where Finn was perched on the counter. Finn gently set aside the apple in his hands in favor of gripping the edge of the counter until his knuckles turned white, he felt Leo’s eyes on him freezing him in place as he took another step closer. 

“Finn, I keep my mark covered,” Leo whispered, taking one last step forward settling between his knees like the press of Finn’s soft thighs around his waist was all he needed to be home. “I’ve done so for years, because I want to fall in love with my people for more than just the names in our skin. I want to fall in love with them because…” Leo paused for a moment, a warm little smile pulled at his lips, “I want to fall in love with them because they are amazing people, because they care for literally everyone around them regardless of who they are, I want to fall in love with them because they are slightly insane,” Finn couldn't hold back a light chuckle at that, “always dragging me into the chaos around them. Fishy,” Leo seemed to be inching closer so very slowly, watching every little move Finn made, “I- I want to fall in love with my people because no matter what is happening in our lives, my heart aches when I'm not with them.”

A little gasp caught in Finn’s throat as he stared into those icy blue eyes, eyes that held more warmth than their color would suggest. No, Leo’s eyes on him felt like basking in the warmth of an oven as he pulled fresh baked bread from within. As he stared into those beautiful baby blues Finn couldn't help but feel like there was more intensity in looking back at him than any friend he'd ever had. Well, aside from Logan, but Logan was different, Logan was his soulmate. 

The realization hit Finn harder than if he'd been slammed into the boards during a game, all this time while he was distracted obliviously falling in love with Leo and his sunshine smile maybe, just maybe, Leo was falling right alongside him. Maybe they were tumbling together through a star studded sky hurtling towards terminal velocity and their only hope for survival was to cling together to land in the other's soft embrace. 

Finn leaned forward not breaking their eye contact, his body felt almost magnetized to Leo, “So have you?” he asked in a voice barely a whisper. 

Leo’s lips curled into a warm, soft smile as he reached out almost tentatively, pressing his palms against Finn's thighs and sliding them up so slowly Finn felt the warmth bleed through the denim of his jeans. Leo’s hands didn’t stop until nimble fingers were brushing the tape at his hip, the thin adhesive cloth covering his soulmark, hiding the name’s of the men Finn held so very close to his heart. 

“You know,” Leo whispered back, “I think I just might’ve...”

Finn couldn't take it anymore, he couldn't take whatever this tension was between them, so thick and tangible he could practically taste it. Emboldened by the warmth in Leo’s eyes, Finn finally leaned forward, closing the distance between them, and nearly sobbing at the soft way Leo kissed him back. It was all careful movements and tender touches, each filled with a love Finn wasn’t sure he had ever felt before, so deep and achingly beautiful. 

Reaching out Finn slid his hands up Leo’s sides, feeling the warm firm muscles of his body under his palms. Finn just held him so very close, he wrapped Leo up in his arms and breathed him in until his lungs felt like bursting but it still wasn't enough. He needed to feel him, needed the warmth and the strength of Leo’s body to bleed into him. Finn couldn't hold back the little sound that caught in his throat as he threaded his fingers into the blond curls he’d been dreaming of for months and they were softer than he ever could have imagined. 

Leo, ” Finn breathed the name against his lips, it was the only word he wanted to say. 

“That’s right sweetheart,” Leo whispered, reaching up to cup his hand against Finn's neck, “I’m here, right here with you. Finally.” 

Their next moments together blurred into a blissful haze until Finn couldn’t even remember what it felt like to not be warmed by the heat of Leo’s body. After they lay in his bed, the sheets and blankets knocked haphazardly out of the way until they littered the floor. Leo had flipped to lay on his stomach, burying his face in pillows that smelled of Finns shampoo and stretching his body like a kitten basking in a sunbeam. Finn felt all light and shivery but still so very warm pressed up against Leo’s side, he couldn’t bear to let even an inch of space between them. The room was quiet with only the sound of their still heavy breathing and Finn sucking leisurely slow kisses into the warm muscle of Leo’s shoulder.

“God” Finn breathed the word against sweat damp skin, “I’m so fucking happy you’re here,” his breath caught as he the little gears inside his heart finally began clicking into place making it flush pure love through his veins with every beat. 

“Me too Fishy,”Leo mumbled into the pillow, “me too.” 

Finn shifted a bit hoping to find a more comfortable position as his arm was currently falling asleep where it was pinned to the mattress. Suddenly though his eyes caught sight of a slow subtle movement at Leo’s shoulders, Finn gasped when he realized delicate silver and gold threads had begun unfurling out from under that strip of tape still running the length of Leo’s spine. They were stunning, a beautiful filigree swirling to life just under that sun golden skin. They curled out from the section of Leo's spine just between his shoulder blades and stretched out giving him the sparkling wings of an angel.

A sob caught in his throat at the sight. 

“What is it sweetheart? What’s wrong?” Leo asked, propping himself up a bit to turn and look at him. 

“It- it’s nothing, just... I knew it was you.”

“Mmm,” Leo hummed, his face taking on a soft smile at the amazement in his partner's eyes, “come’ere sugar,” he whispered and pulled Finn in for another sweet lingering kiss.

Once they finally broke apart Finn curled up behind Leo tucking his forehead in the dip between his shoulder blades where he knew his name was etched. He softly traced a finger over the new silver threads lining the strong muscles until they stopped bluntly halfway down his back, the design incomplete without their third. Incomplete without Logan. 

“It’s pretty,” Finn whispered, pressing a soft kiss to one of the reaching golden threads. 

“Is it?” Leo asked, his voice vibrating through Finn. 

“Mmhm, and big. Bigger than mine, bigger than... his.”

Leo sighed and Finn loosened his arms just enough for him to turn and snuggle into his chest, he buried his nose in those soft blond curls and breathed in until he thought his lungs might burst. And when Leo wrapped his arms so very tightly around Finn's waist he couldn't help but humm at how nice it was, how safe and loved he felt in that embrace.  

“You know,” Leo whispered, his lips brushing Finn's collarbone, “My Nana used to tell me that big feelings always led to big marks. She’d tell me that sometimes the marks are beautiful, glowing golden with the love that created them,” Leo wrapped a palm around Finn's hip right over his covered soulmark. “But she’d also tell me that sometimes those marks can be scars,” Finn sighed at the feeling of Leo running his palm up his body until it was pressed directly over his heart, “scars that we can’t always see cause the wounds cut so deep.”  

Finn sniffled a little and tightened his arms around Leo’s body, “your Nana sounds like a smart lady.”  

“Mmm, she was just very perceptive,” Leo pulled back just a bit to look up at him, “you’ve been with him already, haven't you?” 

Finn huffed a soft laugh, “I see you take after her in the whole perceptive department.” Leo just waited for him to continue, making him chuckle again before nodding. “Yeah, I have. But- he…” Finn breathed in shakily, “he doesn't want me. Or us. He doesn't want to be our soulmate.”  

Leo felt his heat stutter a little at that, he felt a little piece inside him shatter to pieces, “Oh, sweetheart, I’m sorry,” he held Finn a little closer, “I’m so sorry.” 

Finn sniffled before pulling away just enough to look into those bright ice blue eyes, “Leo, I- please don’t leave me… please?” 

Leaning forward Leo kissed up the underside of Finn’s jaw making him sigh as a bit of tension bled from his body, “Sugar, if things go my way, I’ll be by your side till the moment you tell me to leave.”

“Well, then I hope you’re prepared for forever, because it’ll be a cold day in hell before those words leave my lips.” 

“Forever sounds good to me,” Leo threaded his fingers into Finn's fluffy auburn hair and pulled him down to kiss him until they couldn't breathe. 

***

“Jesus Knutty!” Leo felt the snap of a towel against his back as he pulled his shirt off. “That’s one hell of a soul mark you’ve got there,” James chirped as the team was gearing up in the small guest locker room of Ravenclaw stadium for their game.

Leo rolled his eyes, “Well, they’re one hell of a soulmate,” he quipped back, quickly pulling his under armor on and covering the new design that spanned most of his upper back. He could still feel the KT tape in place assuring him that both Finn and Logan’s names were concealed. 

“I can’t believe it, you’ve been in Gryffindor for what? Six months? And you already found your soulmate. It’s not fair!” Talker cried out walking past to get to his own stall. 

“I guess I’m just lucky,” he said softly, secretly shooting a glance at Finn, who had added several more strips of tape to his hip, obscuring the large new addition to his soulmark. Leo wanted to kiss it, he wanted to run his tongue over each silver line until he was shivering from that alone, he wanted to kiss each star in that golden galaxy born of their love. 

But that was for another time, right now he really needed to focus on their game. The team had spent their morning cramped together on the bus to get there for the evening game and now it was finally time to suit up and hit the ice, he couldn't afford to let his thoughts linger on his soulmate. 

That being said nothing could stop him from grinning at the sight of Finn, he knew he couldn’t stare for long so those stolen glances were everything. Leo let his gaze flick over to Logan, he had been subtly watching Finn since the moment he took his shirt off revealing the larger covered mark. 

Actually, Leo had felt Logan’s eyes on him as well burning a hole into his very soul. It was a weird feeling. Knowing that Logan was their third but also knowing that he had chosen to turn away from them. And it hurt

Leo had spent so many hours with him pressed thigh to thigh on the bus, on the airplane traveling from games talking and teasing each other the whole time. They had spent so many hours laughing and telling each other stories from their pasts, he had spent so many hours listening to Logan’s soft, even breathing, sleeping so very close together but yet so far away from him. So far that the space separating their hotel beds might as well have been a mountain range as vast as the Rockies for the likelihood of either of them finding their way to one another through the snowy peaks.

It hurt to look at Logan and know that in those hours spent together he had fallen in love. Fallen for the hot headed man that always looked at him like he was the most important person in the room, he'd fallen for the man that pretended to be so tough on the ice but was soft as marshmallow fluff the moment he was around people he cared about. It hurt that he had fallen in love with the man who guarded his heart with a dragon and moat, a man who had locked it away in an enchanted tower designed to ward off every living soul that dared to try and love him. And it hurt to know that he had fallen in love with a man who had hurt Finn. Cut him so deeply that he felt he had to beg simply to be loved. But there was no stopping it, Leo had already fallen. Logan averted his eyes when their gazes met, making himself busy and pulling on his pads. This was going to be a long night.

“You know we could still probably switch our room assignments,” Leo whispered to Finn as they walked side by side towards the bus after the game. 

Finn chuckled under his breath, “Nah, it’s alright.” He bumped his shoulder lightly against Leo’s, “I’ll wait till we get home, then I can have you all to myself.” 

He laughed and bumped him back, “Alright Fishy.” 

Leo shot a cheeky wink in Finn’s direction then strode ahead and up the stairs of the bus only to flop into his open space next to Logan. Already Leo could feel the heat of their thighs pressed together in the small space, he desperately wished he could simply reach over and press his palm to the warm strong muscles hidden under the smooth material of his game day dress pants. Unfortunately, Leo couldn't do that, he wasn't allowed to touch Logan that casually, especially now when he hadn't uttered a single word to him since the moment he had seen the mark stretching over his shoulders.  

Currently, Logan was leaning against the cool glass of the bus window, his eyes closed as if he were sleeping but Leo knew he wasn't. It was something that had always kinda warmed his heart, Logan would swear up and down that he couldn’t possibly sleep on the bus only to lean over and snooze on Leo’s shoulder an hour into the drive. But if he knew anything he knew Logan would rather go sleep deprived than let his head rattle against the bus window. It was awkward and quiet on the drive to the hotel Logan barely even acknowledging that Leo was there. 

“Are you ever going to talk to me again?” Leo asked when he just couldn’t take the silence anymore. 

“You did good out there tonight rookie,” Logan said, scooting a little closer to the window. ‘Rookie’, not Peanut Butter, not Knutty, not even his real name, Leo felt his heart crack. Logan was building a wall between them. 

“Don’t be like that,” Leo whispered so very softly that maybe Logan didn’t hear him, or maybe he just didn’t want to say anything as the rest of the drive stretched on in silence. Logan didn’t utter another word until they were each in their own beds surrounded by darkness and warm sheets. 

“Congratulations, by the way,” his soft voice came through the dark. 

“For what?” 

“You found your soulmate,” Logan’s voice had a  barely noticeable waver in it. 

Soulmates ,” Leo corrected, “I have two soulmates.” 

Logan chuckled soft and humorless,“no you don’t.” His voice was broken and heartbreakingly sad.

“Lo?” Leo asked only to be met by silence. “Logan, please?” Once more there was only silence. “Fine if you won’t speak to me I’ll talk, you listen.” Leo turned in bed to look at Logan’s back, he could make out the curve of his shoulder and a strip of moonlight slipping through a crack in the curtains illuminated just enough of his beautiful tan skin to make Leo’s mouth water at the sight.

“Do you remember that night,” Leo’s voice was soft in their dark room, “ I think it was like the second, maybe third roadie I went on with the team. And there was that massive thunderstorm. It was horrible, the power was out, and you could just feel the hotel rattle with each thunderclap.” Leo huffed a soft laugh at the memory before continuing, “I remember we were laying there, with the wind rattling the windows and I looked over and saw you just shivering in your bed I realized you were terrified. Logan my heart hurt for you, you were laying there alone and scared and I just couldn't leave you like that. I knew it was probably silly but I asked you if I could come give you a hug because I was scared. I didn't want you to think I was teasing or judging you but you saw directly through me, you knew I wasn't scared but you let me come crawl into your bed anyway. And as we were laid there I held you as you shook apart in my arms, but after a little while I felt you relax, I felt relief flood through your body as you finally accepted that there was safety in the two of us tucked together under the sheets. Lo, do you remember what you told me then?” Leo asked. 

There was a little sniffle from Logan's bed but he remained silent. 

Leo continued on anyway, “You told me it was an irrational fear, you told me you didn’t know why the storm made you so scared. And I just remember thinking, it’s completely rational to be scared of storms. They're loud and destructive, and that feeling of something so much bigger than yourself shaking you to your very core is scary, but Logan, I was so glad I got to be there to comfort you cause the thought of you all alone trying to weather that made my heart hurt.” 

Logan still didn’t speak but at this point Leo didn't expect him to. “There’s nothing wrong with being scared Lo. Rational, irrational, fear is fear and it always feels the same and it always hurts. But Lo, you don’t have to be scared of this, of us , of Finn and me. Please… just let us hold you as you're shaking apart in this storm. We can do this together, we can be safe together, just as we were in that storm.” 

The room fell into silence again once Leo was finally finished speaking, but then there was a sharp inhale and Logan’s broken voice whispering, “go to sleep rookie.”

Leo’s heart broke at those words, he felt a sob wrack his body but if Logan heard the sound he made no move to comfort him from the cutting rejection. 

***

Finn and Leo settled into a new normal, which in all honesty was very similar to their old normal just with more kisses. Leo loved being home with Finn. He loved the simple freedom of just leaning over to press a kiss into that pile of auburn fluff Finn tried to pass off as hair. He loved that when they relaxed together on their couch he could curl up into Finn's side and bask in the warmth of his arms. But most of all Leo loved that he could love Finn there. He loved the way they could bring their bodies together starting with a blank canvas only to create a masterpiece of pleasure over and over again. 

In the days that followed that horrible trip, every interaction with Logan felt stilted and awkward to the point that even some of the others on the team began to notice. And by the next roadie Leo was over it. He and Finn had decided to stick to their normal roommates for the time being, after all they didn’t really want people knowing that they were soulmates quite yet. So that meant the next time Leo stepped onto the bus he plopped down right next to Logan who looked up at him with a look of half shock and half curiosity.

“What are you doing?” He asked, pulling out one of his earbuds as Leo made himself comfortable. 

“Sitting,” he scoffed, “what does it look like?” 

Logan rolled his eyes as the bus rumbled to life.

“Well no shit Sherlock, why are you sitting here?” 

“Cause this is where I always sit.” 

“Yeah, but that was... before. Why don’t you go sit with Finn?” 

“Because Finn is sitting with Kasey, like he always does. And I am sitting with you like I always do.” 

“But why!” Logan asked, agitated. 

“Because you're my friend Logan!” Leo finally said harshly, Logan opened his mouth to reply but was silenced by the fierce look in Leo’s icy blue eyes. “Alright, listen here,” Leo’s voice dropped to a low whisper but it was sharp as a cracking whip. “I am not your soulmate. You made that abundantly clear. And I will respect that because it’s your prerogative to choose who you love and who you spend your life with, no one gets to tell you who that is. Not me, not Finn, not even fucking fate. It’s your decision, and your decision alone. But that being said, you are still my friend and I refuse to lose you to something as superficial and shallow as a goddamn soulmark! You hear me?” 

There was a beat of silence Logan simply blinking at him in shock, then a small grin began pulling at his lips as he finally answered Leo’s rant with a little, “Yes sir.” 

And just like that the tension between them had broken, shattered to pieces like the stained glass in an abandoned chapel. 

Leo chuckled softly then groaned, “Oh my god, I just sounded exactly like my Mama,” he said, turning to a laughing Logan. 

“Did you know,” Logan said, reaching out to ruffle Leo’s blond curls, “you kinda get fluffy when you're mad.” 

“Shaddup,” Leo rolled his eyes with a huff. 

Logan laughed again, “like a pissed off cockatoo.” Leo couldn’t help but burst out laughing at that. 

“Go back to listening to your music,” Leo said, giving him a bit of a playful shove.

“I’ll see you in the locker room Nutty,” Logan said, giving Leo a little hip bump and a bright smile as they made their way off the bus a little while later. 

“See ya in a bit Tremz,” Leo chuckled softly as Logan walked ahead. 

“Now how the hell did you do that?” Leo glanced over his shoulder to see Finn coming up behind him with a slightly astounded look on his face. 

“Hmm?” Leo asked, a little confused. 

“Logan,” Finn jerked his head in the direction he had just walked, “that’s probably the most normal and relaxed I’ve seen him since...” Leo’s eyes flicked down to see Finn's hand resting just over his soulmark, “well you know. So what did you say to him?” 

“I um...” Leo felt a flush begin to creep onto his cheeks, “I kinda yelled at him.” 

Finn blinked in surprise, “and that worked?” 

Leo shrugged, “seems like it. I mean I just told him that it’s his right to choose who he loves, and soulmate or not we’re still friends. Then he told me I looked like a pissed off cockatoo and things kinda just fell back to normal.” 

Finn laughed a little at that, “well I mean you do get kinda fluffy when you’re angry.” 

Leo made a disgruntled face and stuck his tongue out. 

“That’s it! That’s the face!” He reached out and ruffled Leo’s curls, “it makes your hair stand on end.” Rolling his eyes Leo just accepted it, but when he looked into Finn's eyes he was giving him a soft look. 

“I told you once before,” Leo whispered, “I don’t want to love someone simply for the names etched in our skin, and I don’t expect anyone else to love me for the same reason. We all deserve to choose who we spend our lives with. I mean a soulmate isn’t destiny, it’s a singular option in an ocean of possibilities.”

Finn's eyes bore into Leo’s full of immeasurable feeling, he quickly glanced around to make sure no one was paying attention to them then leaned in close to Leo’s ear cupping his hand so no one could see the words forming on his lips. 

“You know,” he whispered, “if we weren’t in public I would pull you into my arms right now and kiss you until neither of us could breathe.” 

“Later,” Leo said softly grinning at Finn, “when we’re home.”

The game was tense. They had been tied with the Snakes 1:1 since the first period and that didn’t seem to be changing anytime soon. As per normal the Snakes were playing dirty, already racking up more penalties than the last two games the Lions played combined. Leo had stopped more shots than he could even keep track of but it wasn’t over yet. The entire stadium was desperately hoping for the tie to break, and then halfway through the third something broke. Sadly though it wasn’t the score. 

Leo’s eyes were locked on the puck, his entire body reacting at the speed of light to each pass, each little movement the players made, wherever it was going to be shot he was ready. As the puck got closer and closer Leo’s body got tighter and tighter coiled and ready to snap. It didn’t even enter his thoughts that the closer the puck got, the closer the players got. After all they were supposed to stop, they always stopped. Then there was a split second of utter paralyzing fear as Leo suddenly realized this was going to end very very badly, then quicker than lightning that fear was overwritten by the most excruciating pain he had ever felt in his life. Chaos broke out around him but everything blurred into streaks of red and green as all Leo could do was lay still, the cold ice soaking into the back of his Jersey. 

***

Finn couldn’t stop them. He was utterly powerless. Trapped on the bench watching in slow motion as Leo’s body crumpled under the weight of two Snakes. He watched horrified as one of their knees hit him directly in the mask making his neck snap backwards farther than could ever be considered ‘normal’. The weight of the players made Leo’s body slam hard into one of the goal posts but then he just lay there. Terrifyingly still. Finn wasn’t sure if a hush actually fell over the stadium or if the blood rushing in his ears was blocking out the sound. One way or the other he didn’t care. The only thought in his mind was Leo

He didn’t remember jumping back into the ice. He didn’t remember pushing through the skirmishes of his own teammates beating Snake players bloody. All Finn remembered was suddenly being at Leo’s side and seeing his face contorted with pain, eyes scrunched up and breathing in sharp gasps. It was a sight that would haunt him years to come. It would be the image to flash behind his closed eyelids when he was trapped in nightmares, the little pained moans would sound in his ears like fog horns each time someone would get anywhere near Leo.

“Finn, you need to back up! Let the paramedics tend to him.” Remus pulled him back by the collar of his jersey as the med team carefully secured Leo in a neck brace then to the stretcher and finally lifted him off the ice. 

Without even thinking Finn followed, like a tether was tied around his heart pulling him forward. As if he were a sad little, half deflated, ‘Get Well Soon’ balloon tied to Leo’s ankle. As soon as he got to the exit off the ice Finn felt a hand reach out and stop him, his heart tugging painfully as the paramedics continued on, taking Leo without him.

 “O’Hara,” Coach Weasley said holding him there, “Look I know he’s your friend and you’re worried about him but we still have a game to finish.” 

Yanking his arm free Finn glowered at his coach. “He’s not just my friend ,” his voice dropped to a whisper low enough only Coach could hear, “he’s my partner and my goddamn soulmate. I’m going to the fucking hospital with him.” 

Coach blinked at him in surprise, “Oh, I- I didn’t realize. Then of course, go.”

Without so much as another word Finn walked away, the only thought in his mind was the words please be ok, please be ok, please… circling over and over again. The next couple hours of Finn's life passed in an odd numb haze, there was so much fear and adrenaline rushing through his system that he burst into the hospital in a panic only to be directed to a hard plastic chair and told to wait. What for what? That Finn didn't know. He didn't know anything . All he knew was the anxious jitters making his body tremble as the image of Leo laying so still on the ice, his face contorted in pain, cycled over and over again in his mind until finally someone in a pair of scrubs called his name. 

They were talking and somewhere in the back of his mind Finn knew he should be listening but honestly he didn’t care, all he wanted was to see Leo. All he wanted was to know that he was ok, that it looked worse than it was because it looked horrible.  

Eventually, the doctor realized that Finn wasn't really retaining a word she said. Taking pity on him she led Finn to a little private room and opened the door to reveal Leo . His face looked so unnaturally pale, his neck was still immobilized in a plastic brace and there were wires and tubes hooked up to beeping monitors. Finn hated it. He hated seeing him like that. And when the doctor finally left, all he could do was pull the little plastic chair closer to Leo’s bed and lay his head so very gently on the edge of that scratchy hospital sheet, too scared to touch him. 

There was a moment of near silence then... Finn sobbed . His heart ached as he looked up at Leo’s pale face. The beep of the monitor so very loud in the silence of the hospital room, a monotone pipe organ accompanying the broken gospel choir of his cries. Distantly Finn heard the click of the door opening but he didn’t look up until he heard a soft little gasp just inside the room. Wiping away the tears burning his cheeks, Finn glanced over to find Logan standing there, the door falling shut behind him. 

“Lo,” he said shakily, “you came.” 

An unreadable look flickered in Logan’s eyes before he said simply, “Of course I came.” 

Finn stood up and took a step towards Logan, “Lo, I- I know things are still...” he didn’t quite know how to complete that thought and his head was too tired to really try, “but I- I need...” 

Without hesitation Logan strode forward and pulled Finn into his arms, “Oh Finn, come’ere.” 

Another sob wracked his body while they held each other but the feeling of Logan's body, warm and solid, was so very comforting, grounding. The anchor that Finn desperately needed to stop from drifting away in the strong currents of an ocean churning with life altering tidal waves. 

Finn sighed at the feeling of Logan’s face buried against his chest, he held him tight, a life line in this horrible horrible storm. 

“Have the doctors told you anything yet?” Logan whispered, rubbing his cheek against the soft material of a Finns T shirt, right over his heart. 

Sniffling softly Finn shook his head, “No, not yet. Last they told me, they were waiting for the results of his CT, MRI, x ray all that stuff. Umm, they said he was stable and didn’t have a concussion when he was brought in so they gave him something for the pain and... he’s been sleeping ever since.” 

Finn finally pulled away from Logan only to look back at Leo’s still form, he sniffled again and wandered back to his hard plastic chair at the side of the bed, all he could do was sit there watching him, waiting. Suddenly, warm arms snaked around him from behind and tightened around his chest. 

“He’s gonna be ok baby, he’s gonna be ok,” Logan whispered into his hair. 

Finn sighed and turned his face into Logan’s bicep, “you don’t know that.” 

“No, I don’t,” he said sadly, “but all that’s left to do is hope. Le’s strong, he’ll be ok. He has to be ok.” 

Honestly, Finn wasn’t sure if Logan’s words were intended to comfort him or Logan himself. Either way Finn held on to those words, he let them get stuck in his head until he couldn’t think of a word that wasn’t ‘ he’ll be ok ’ they circled like a prayer in his mind. He wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that, Logan’s arms wrapped tight around his chest, his face buried in Finn's hair. But the moment the door clicked open Logan jumped back like he had been scorched, Finn didn’t even have the energy to be hurt by that little action. He stood up when he saw the doctor though, desperately hoping she was bearing good news. 

“Alright well...” the doctor started speaking but paused when she caught sight of Logan. “Oh, I’m sorry we haven’t met yet. I'm the physician taking care of Leo here. And you are?” 

“I’m um,” Logan started, he opened his mouth to continue speaking but nothing seemed to come out. “I’m their- Um... he’s my- we’re-“ Logan struggled to find the words. Then he looked over at Leo laying still on the hospital bed, he looked into Finn's red rimmed eyes and face swollen from tears and felt something in his heart click into place. Logan took a deep breath and let the words fall from his tongue with conviction, “I’m their soulmate.” Finn inhaled sharply but he didn’t really have time to think about it as the doctor quickly responded. 

“Oh! Alright, no problem. I was just coming to tell Finn but of course now you as well, we got the last of the imaging results. The good news is that nothing is broken, it looks like the hyperextension of his neck caused a herniated disc that is now pressing on a nerve. Along with that the impact on the goal post bruised a couple ribs but again nothing is broken. Now for the disc, there are a couple different options of treatment and those I will go over with Leo once the pain meds wear off and he’s a bit more coherent. I don’t like to make promises, but overall I think he’ll be able to make a full recovery.” Finn breathed a sigh of relief, the knots in his stomach loosening for the first time since Leo went down on the ice. 

“Um,” Logan said, “when... when do you think he’ll wake up?” 

“Honestly, he could wake up at any minute. It’s really just kinda up to his body. But sleep is good for him, helps him heal. So don’t worry that he’s sleeping. Anyway I’ll have a nurse come check on him in a bit.” With that the doctor ducked out of the room leaving it back as just the three of them. 

This time Logan settled in the chair while Finn gently bounced on the balls of his feet absentmindedly letting some of his residual anxious energy bleed out. Logan sighed softly, he closed his eyes and pressed the gentlest of kisses to Leo’s knee, one of the few places on his body that wasn’t injured. A shiver ran through Logan’s body as he leaned back in the chair, his hand wandered up to his collarbone to fiddle with his shirt. 

“That was the first time I’ve heard you actually say it,” Finn whispered, stepping closer to where Logan sat next to Leo’s bed. “Even... back then, you never actually said the words.” 

Logan looked up with a sad little smile, “I know I didn’t,” he let his eyes fall back to Leo. “I know its stupid but a part of me thought that maybe if I didn’t say the words aloud, I could pretend that the feelings inside me weren’t real.” The room fell into silence at Logan’s words, Finn didn’t know what to say. 

Luckily he didn’t have to think too hard about it because only a moment later Leo groaned and blinked his eyes open hazily, “Lo?” His voice was rough and gravely and so very tired, “you’re here.” 

“Yeah, I’m here Le, I’m here,” he whispered. 

“Finnie?” Leo called out weakly. 

“Hi Peanut Butter,” Finn sniffled as he stepped closer into Leo’s line of sight. 

“No more crying. Ok baby? I’m fine.” 

Finn laughed wetly, “How do you know I’ve been crying, you’ve been snoozing this whole time.” 

Leo hummed softly, like he wanted to laugh but he was too tired, “cause I know you, ya sap.” Finn chuckled at that. “How’d the game finish?” 

Logan sighed and spoke softly, “we lost. But at least the Snakes are gonna be down a couple players for the next few games.” 

Leo hummed again, “you fuck ‘em up for me Tremz?” 

“Hell fucking yeah I did. Got the bloody knuckles to prove it,” Logan held up his hands and for the first time Finn realized they were littered with little cuts and gashes. “No one touches my goalie and gets away with it.” 

“Hmm, your goalie?” Leo asked weakly. 

“Yeah, my goalie,” Logan carefully reached out and rested his hand on Leo’s calf. 

A little smile pulled at his lips, “your hand’swarm,” Leo’s words began to slur as his eyes fell closed once again, “feels nice.” And with that he was asleep again. 

Finn scrounged up another chair somewhere and plopped down next to Logan at Leo’s bedside. For the first time in hours he finally relaxed enough to feel the soreness and fatigue that had set in deep in his bones. Sighing heavily Finn couldn’t stop himself from letting his body wilt to the side and lean onto Logan’s shoulder. 

“I’m tired,” he whispered, enjoying the warmth radiating from Logan, “and I have to pee.” 

Logan huffed a quiet laugh, “oh my god, then just go.” 

He gave Finn a gentle push but he simply shook his head and leaned more heavily onto his shoulder, “Don’t wanna leave him.”  

Logan made a sad sound, “Finn,” he reached up and gently patted his cheek, “go take care of yourself. Go to the bathroom, grab some water or coffee. I’ll be here. I’ll be with him. I’m not leaving, either of you.” 

A little whine caught in Finn's throat at Logan’s words, closing his eyes he turned and pressed his forehead into the warm muscle of Logan’s shoulder, “thank you.” The soft whisper was almost inaudible, “Lo, thank you for being here... I- I didn’t know how to do this alone.”

“Well,” Logan said, “I guess it’s a good thing you're not alone then. Now go. Go get some air.”

The room felt oddly hollow without Finn there. Without his anxious fidgeting, without the soft sound of his breathing, or his occasional sniffles the room was nothing more than cold. The sterile white walls reminiscent of a concrete mausoleum, a pale crypt to hold the man he had turned away. 

God, get a grip on yourself. Leo will be ok. The doctor said he’d be ok . Logan thought, trying to shake away the dark clouds in his mind. He almost wasn’t though, you almost lost him. Logan rested his cheek on the edge of Leo’s mattress and looked up at him all battered and bruised, I don’t ever want to lose him, god, or Finn. I think I might... Logan felt a tingling itching sensation along the collar of his shirt but he ignored it, not wanting to look away from Leo’s sleeping face. Another few minutes passed then the door suddenly clicked open. 

“Lo,” Finn said, stepping into the room, coffee cup in hand, “What happened?” 

Logan’s brow furrowed in confusion, “What do you mean what happened?” 

“You didn’t feel it?” Finn set his cup down and walked closer until he was standing right next to Logan, “ look. ” 

He pulled at the hem of his shirt and the waistband of his jeans until he revealed a stunning silver and gold iris etched into his skin. The stem reached down to curl around the names at his hip while the bloom extended upwards onto the side of Finn's torso swirling with the contours of his body. Within each leaf and petal there were tiny delicate galaxies, stars and constellations sparkling against Finns pale skin. 

“Your soulmark,” Logan whispered, without even thinking he reached out to trail his fingers up the beautiful image,“it’s finished. How?” 

“I- I don’t know, I was on my way back and I felt a tingling on my side and when I looked... It was finished. What were you doing in here?” 

“I was just sitting here... thinking... about him. About how scared I was at the thought of losing him, about how I...” Logan looked up at Finn and brought his hand up to his collarbone, “then I felt a tingling on my chest.”

“Lo,” Finn reached out gently brushing his fingers against Logan’s shirt, “can I?” 

Logan swallowed hard but nodded, “Yeah,” he said a little breathless. 

So very carefully Finn pushed up the soft fabric of his shirt, Logan couldn’t help the way his stomach flexed at the feeling of Finn's fingers soft on his skin. He hadn’t felt his touch in years but it was as warm as if he had never taken his hands off him. It wasn’t more than a moment before Finn was finally pulling Logan’s shirt over his head, chuckling softly as the motion knocked his SnapBack askew. Suddenly his eyes went wide as they locked onto Logan’s collarbone. 

“Yours too,” Finn couldn’t stop himself from tracing a finger over the thick silver lines of Logan’s soulmark. 

The focal point of the mark was an intricate lion head in delicate gold, strong silver lines framed it in a V shape drawing Finn's eyes down Logan’s pec. The closer he looked the more little details Finn noticed. Within those silver lines were little golden fish as if they were miniature aquariums in his skin. At first Finn thought it was simply golden dot work decorating the edges and negative space of the design but then it hit him, not dots, stars . There were countless delicate golden stars covering Logan’s chest leading up to his clavicle and clustering around his and Leo’s names, thin barely there silver lines traced out constellations. 

“It’s beautiful Lo, it fits you,” Finn whispered, still lightly tracing the now completed soulmark making goosebumps rise under his fingers tips. 

“Mmh, I don’t understand. Leo and I haven’t...” 

“I don’t know, Lo. I- I thought you had to... you know be with your soulmate before the mark would finish. And... not gonna lie, I never thought I’d get to see them completed.” 

“Guys,” suddenly Leo’s gruff, groggy voice sounded. Finn and Logan both quickly turned to see that his eyes were open watching them.

“Hey you,” Finn smiled and moved closer, “did we wake you up? I’m so sorry sweetheart.” 

“Nah, s’ok. I think the meds are wearing off a bit.” 

“Are you in pain? I can go grab the doctor really quick,” Finn said concerned. 

“It’s not too bad right now. But I heard you guys talking...” 

“Hmm,” Finn hummed softly, “yeah, baby look.” He moved so that his body was more in Leo’s line of sight before raising his shirt again revealing the iris curling up his body, “we don’t really know why but... our marks are finished.” 

“I think I know why,” Leo said his voice still a little hazy from his meds and sleep, “it’s not the sex that activate a soulmark. It’s love . Just for so many people by the time they’ve met their soulmate they already have such strong feelings that it manifests during sex. But there are thousands and thousands of people out there probably millions actually that don’t have sex, but they still have soulmates. They still have people to love and who love them just as much, they just find each other with their hearts instead.” 

Leo paused for a moment to catch his breath then he let his eyes slide to Logan and a little smile pulled at his lips, “Lo, I told you it’s your choice who you want to love, but... the marks... I can’t help but hope that maybe... maybe you’ve chosen.” 

Logan felt a fluttering in his stomach, he had since pulled his shirt back on but he couldn’t resist the urge to reach up and trace the new patterns on his chest that lay just under the fabric. 

“Le, my entire life I’ve been terrified of the day I would meet these people the universe had decided would be mine. I was terrified that I would meet you two only to find out that the universe was wrong, that you two would hate me, that you wouldn’t want me.” Finn made a soft little hurt sound beside him but Logan continued.

“Then when I met Finn and I felt just how very deep he actually felt for me that fear changed. I was so scared that if the world was to ever find out that I got such a beautiful love it would rip it from my heart like a weed in soft soil. And I- I didn’t think I could take that. So I ripped it out myself, I walked away from him. And it hurt , it hurt more than I could have possibly imagined. So when I met you Le, I didn’t want to feel that pain again. I couldn't do it again. I cut off the possibility of your love before it could really even be an option. But you . You had to go and be your sweet, caring self and worm your way into my heart anyway.” 

Tears had begun collecting in Logan's eyes as he spoke, for the first time in his life he was letting the feeling that he always kept under lock and key flow freely. The words spilled from his mouth as easily as water in a bubbling creek. 

“Le, I- I’m still scared. I’m scared of the hatred and the prejudice in this world. Scared that I won’t get to keep your love. But... tonight I felt a fear greater than anything I’d felt before. Fear that I could have lost you entirely, lost you without ever getting to love you.” Logan sniffled and reached out, gently setting his hand on Leo’s leg, “so yes. I am choosing.” 

Logan blinked and turned to look up into Finn's beautiful brown eyes, misty from his own tears, “I’m choosing the man I’ve loved since the day I stepped into our dorm room. The man that even though I’ve caused him horrible pain he’s never once turned away from me.” Logan watched large tear drops roll down Finn's cheeks at his words but he wasn’t done yet. Turning back to Leo, he continued, “I am choosing the man that makes me feel like nothing can ever hurt me. I’m choosing the man that held me tight as I shook apart during a storm whispering promises of the coming sunshine. Even though the light shining from his heart was warmer and brighter than the sun itself.” 

Taking a deep breath Logan reached out with his other hand to take hold of Finns lacing their fingers together. Then in a soft whisper, “I’m choosing my soulmates. For as long as they’ll have me.”

“Well,” Leo whispered sniffling just a little, “then you better be prepared for forever cause that's how long I’m in this for. What about you, Fish? You still in for forever?” 

Finn positively beamed with happiness. The smile splitting his freckled face, still a bit blotchy from tears, filled the entire room with warmth as he sidled up behind Logan and wrapped him up tight in his arms. 

He let one hand settle on Logan’s chest, directly over his heart over his mark, “Forever and eternity, Nutter Butter. Forever and eternity.” 

Logan’s body relaxed leaning back into Finn's embrace, tension and fear bleeding out of him. 

“God, I wish I could kiss you two right now,” Leo sighed sadly. 

“When we’re home sweetheart, till none of us can breathe,” Finn replied. 

Leo huffed softly, “I’m gonna hold you to that Fish Sticks.”

***

Leo’s recovery was actually smoother than any of them thought it would be considering that first emotional night in the hospital. The next day when he was a bit more coherent Leo’s doctor went over some treatment options for his injuries. Ultimately Leo chose surgery. It would return him to the ice the fastest, but even then he would still have several months of physical therapy. A slow arduous process of working his body back to where he was before the hit. 

But despite it all Leo was immeasurably grateful to have his soulmates by his side taking every step of the healing process in stride. By the time Leo’s body had healed enough for him to return to practice, the three of them had settled into each other. They had learned how to move together, synchronize their heartbeats to the same rhythm. Touch and be touched, love and be loved. They learned all the little things that drove the others up a wall and they learned the little things that turned them soft as putty in warm hands, ready and willing to molded into a sculpture made of love and care.

Though it seemed like the day would never come it was suddenly time, Leo would be back in the goal for practice tomorrow, and the thought of that filled him with both excited butterflies and squirming anxiety. After spending so much time away from the ice he couldn’t help but think... what if he wasn’t good enough anymore. Hoping to smother his brain Leo flopped face first onto their bed, pulled a pillow over his head, and groaned. 

“Le?” Logan’s voice came muffled through the pillow, “you ok baby?” Leo just groaned again, he felt Logan’s weight settle onto the bed beside him and a warm palm on his lower back. “What’s wrong Knutty?” Logan gently ran his hands up the length of his back before sliding back down to knead the tight muscle just above the waistline of his shorts. This time the groan that found its way out Leo’s throat was one of pure pleasure as Logan’s hands worked the tension from his body. 

Leo hesitantly pushed the pillow off his head but left his face buried in their bedsheets, “what if I can’t do it  Lo?” 

“Hmm, do what? Play?” Leo nodded and melted further into the bed under Logan’s touch. 

“Sweetheart, hockey is in your very bones. I’ll take more than a couple months away to change that, and the second your skates hit the ice all this worry will melt away you’ll see.” 

Leo sighed softly; it was always so very hard to stay worried when one of his soulmates was touching him. Logan leaned forward and began pressing soft loving kisses down the length of Leo’s spine. Since that night in the hospital he had stopped covering the names in his skin and instead wore them proudly. The feeling of Logan’s lips softly kissing each letter first in Finns name then his own working his way steadily down each vertebrae in his spine made Leo’s breath catch. 

“Le, have I ever told you how much I love your soulmark?” Logan hummed when he had kissed all the way down to Leo’s waistline.

Leo huffed a laugh somewhat breathy from the way Logan was touching him. “Baby, I think you tell me every time I take my shirt off.” 

Leo felt his partner's lips pull into a smile as he pressed yet another kiss into his skin, “that’s cause it’s stunning.” 

The first time Finn and Logan saw Leo’s completed soulmark they had both been shocked at the beautifully intricate design that stretched all the way from the top of his neck to the base of his spine and spanned the entire width of his back. Silver wings stretched over his shoulder blades, each individual feather was tipped in gold that dripped down his back leading into golden chains. Attached to each chain hung a unique charm, a fleur de lis, a music note, a book, a pair of glasses. Down on his lower back one of the silver gold tipped feathers from his wings had drifted down to land next to a silver inkwell filled with golden ink; the tip had shifted to that of a traditional quill. Lastly, throughout the center of the mark golden stars were clustered along the entire length of Leo’s spine most heavily around his soulmate's names. 

Finn had been the first to move, he reached out and trailed his fingers up Leo’s spine careful to avoid the still fresh injury. He breathed in a little shakily and leaned in to press a careful kiss to Leo’s shoulder.

“Sweetheart,” he whispered, “we’re written in the stars in your skin. I guess that means the three of us are destined to burn bright as the sun.” Leo smiled at the memory and pressed back a little into Logan’s warm hands still sliding against his skin but now simply tracing the shimmering lines of his mark.

“And what are you two doing in here?” Finn's voice sounded from the doorway, Leo heard the pad of his footsteps approach the bed and felt the dip of the mattress as he sat down. “Hmm, we loving on Knutty tonight?” Leo turned a bit to see that Finn had settled himself behind Logan, wrapped his arms around his waist, and was steadily sucking kisses up the length of his neck. 

Logan sighed and leaned into Finn's chest, “Hmm, Le was just feeling a bit tense about tomorrow.” 

Finn looked from where he was kissing Logan, “Don’t worry Nutter Butter, you’re gonna kill it tomorrow.” 

Leo chuckled softly and turned over to look at them fully, Finn had his chin resting on Logan’s shoulder. He felt such a warmth settle in his stomach at the sight of them like that, his soulmates all love and support, for him and for each other. 

“God I love you guys,” he said, feeling like his heart might burst. 

“Love you too Peanut Butter,” Finn said, nuzzling his face into Logan’s neck. 

Logan’s smile was warm and sweet as sugar cookies fresh from the oven as he whispered,“I love you Le, forever.”