I stare at the sky, observing the stars that glimmered across it as the girl beside me whimpered into her hands, trying to prevent her emotions from overflowing.
Not a soul spoke. I just looked at her and watched as she used her hands to wipe the tears that continuously rolled down her cheeks. Yet, despite her countless attempts to stop herself from crying, she gave in and buried her head in her knees.
Asking how the girl was doing was useless. It would be clear to anyone that this fragile girl wouldn’t be okay after getting her heart broken by love that turned out to be unrequited.
As we sat in silence, the gentle wind blew our hair, cooling both our bodies. As I stared at her, I realized she wasn’t wearing her coat. Worried that the girl might catch a cold, I took mine off and covered her with it.
She flinched at the sudden heavy feeling that covered her back. I wrapped the surrounding sleeves to make sure it wouldn’t fall if she moved. After that, I sat closer to her and leaned on her. Ignoring the cold air brush against my skin.
She didn’t mind. At least that’s what I thought. She didn’t resist nor told me to get off of her. She just let it happen.
“Won’t you get a cold?” She asked, breaking the silence.
“If you get sick, won’t Tendo-san get worried?”, ‘What Maya would think doesn’t matter right now', I thought.
“I’d be more worried if you got one,” I replied, watching the clouds slowly drift away in the sky, revealing the moon.
The sight in the sky became beautiful after the moon finally revealed its beauty. I couldn’t help but smile at the magnificent view.
“The moon’s beautiful, isn’t it?” I asked. My eyes drifting off to the stars that surrounded it.
Mahiru slightly raised her head, observing the moon before the clouds covered its beauty again. “It is. It really is.” She answered.
“I love how it can light up the night. Shining away the darkness that covered the sky.” She spoke gently as a smile crept across her face.
Obviously, she was referencing it to her, to the girl that broke her heart. Still, I can’t help but wonder how this girl could love such a foolish woman. But I didn’t bother. We all had different preferences, after all.
Mine was her, the girl that spoke so dearly of the girl that broke her heart, Mahiru. Though it pained me to see her cry, a part of me wanted to shove Karen against a wall and tell her what she was missing out on. But, I knew better than to use violence against people.
“Kuro-chan.” I turned to the girl that called my name. Her eyes were red and puffy from the tears she wept, and the handkerchief she held looked drenched from the tears it absorbed.
“Thank you. Thank you for staying with me.” She said with a smile.
“You encouraged me to confess to her and I really appreciate that.” ‘Ah, yes. It hurt seeing her with Karen, but it made me feel better when she felt happy to be with her’, I thought, forcing a smile whenever Mahiru would rant about her.
“Even though I got rejected, I’m glad I could tell her what I felt.” ‘How about me? Can I really tell you how I feel? Even if I do, the answer is painfully clear’. My cheerful facade slightly broke at that thought, but I immediately dismissed it.
Mahiru leaned closer, her arms reaching out, wrapping my body in a warm embrace. “Thank you for everything, Kuro-chan.” She said, resting her head on my shoulder while her embrace around me tightened.
This warm feeling I felt right now was more than I could ever want. My heart was beating as fast as it ever did. Even if my hands were shaking from nervousness, I still managed to wrap my hands around her body to return the warm embrace.
I hoped she wouldn’t feel my heart racing or my hands trembling. It’s unnecessary to make her more worried than she is right now trying to think about how to face Karen tomorrow.
After a while, I was finally able to calm myself down. Though the girl still had her arms around me, her embrace had loosened. It didn’t bother me, though. Even if she had weakened, that warm feeling remained.
I felt sleepy, but I didn’t want to ruin this moment between us. Even if she meant this hug as just us being friends, I wanted it to mean more than that. I wanted her to think of me as more, to think of me better than what she had thought of Karen. I wanted her to love me, to cherish me, to only look at me.
But these selfish desires of mine can never come true, it never will. Still, I want to indulge myself in these desires of mine and pretend that she looks at me the same way I look at her.
“Can we stay like this for a while?” I asked, my arms tightening the embrace I had around the frail girl.
“Kuro-chan?” Confused by the sudden change of mood, Mahiru loosened her hug around my body and looked at me.
“Please.” Mahiru was concerned by my tight grip on her, but she decided to ignore it and allowed me.
“..Of course,” Mahiru answered as the girl gently nuzzled closer to her chest, burying her head completely.
The night was quiet and lovely. While I rested my head against Mahiru’s chest, cherishing every minute of this moment, Mahiru simply hugged me tight and smiled as she felt my warm embrace wrapped around her body.
Although I continued to dream about me and Mahiru, I knew deep down that my desires would simply stay as a dream, never to become a reality. ‘Even if I begged God to make it come true, even God herself can’t change how a person looks at another.’
I sighed, thinking about what I had thought earlier. “How could Mahiru love such a foolish woman?” She grinned. How can I say that when I myself was foolish enough to love someone whose romantic interest was so painfully obvious?
‘How silly was it for me to fall in love with you?’
‘If only I’d known better and stopped myself from looking at you. But I can’t blame myself either. Mahiru is a wonderful girl, though Mahiru never had the self-confidence to recognize how bright she shone. In my eyes, she shone the brightest.’
‘Oh, how I wish you knew how much you mean to me, Mahiru.’
Over 5 minutes had passed, but neither of them moved nor spoke. They just comforted themselves in the silence while the stars danced in the sky, and as the moon shimmered through the night.
They don’t know what’ll happen in the future, but the knowledge of having each other to vent to made it slightly better.