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Andy Sachs: Fake Date

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Andy Sachs: Fake Date

Miranda sighed, nursing the whiskey in front of her. How she’d let herself be talked into staying past her usual fifteen minute appearance was beyond her, but Nigel insisted that James' party was the perfect place to celebrate her divorce being finalized. He’d disappeared somewhere after his fourth Holt Punch, and Miranda had escaped the crowd to a sofa in a dark corner where she could observe without being seen. Perhaps a younger version of herself would be ensconced in the crowd, pressed between dancing bodies, losing herself in the night - but it had been a long time since Miranda had let go and allowed herself to truly enjoy the moment without dissecting the possible outcomes of each decision.

With a quick glance at her watch, Miranda decided she’d finish her drink and leave. While her friend had convinced her to stay far longer than she’d ever consider, there was a limit to her desire to be alone in a crowded room. She’d give it five more minutes to see if Nigel would reappear, but the trendy loft was only trendy until it reached what must have been twice the fire code approved limit.

The editor frowned slightly at the thought of her divorce. Another failed marriage, though she was far happier to see this one end than her first. Stephen was whiny and unremarkable in everything he did. He was, at best, middle of the pack. Miranda was a wolf. She refused to accept less than the best from her team, and she expected better than perfection from herself. How she’d ended up with someone middle of the pack in the first place was something she would need to discuss with her therapist if she ever decided to call the woman back. Taking the last sip of her whiskey, she began digging through her bag, looking for her cell phone to call Roy.

A sudden presence at her side made the editor jump. She bit back a caustic remark as the stunning brunette began speaking at a rapid fire pace.

“Hi, this is going to sound crazy but could you pretend to be having an extremely serious conversation with me? I’ll buy you a drink or give you my first born child - just, please act like you know me and that we are very much engaged in this serious conversation.”

Miranda cocked an eyebrow with a small smirk.

“Don’t you know it’s dangerous to make deals with the devil?” Miranda held a finger up as the other woman began to speak again. “Do you ever breathe?”

The brunette chuckled. “Only when I have time between writing articles about war torn countries and the corrupt governments who made them that way.”

Miranda’s eyes widened in surprise. On a normal day, she’d dismiss the younger woman without a second thought. She’d blame whiskey and melancholy for entertaining this situation if anyone dared to ask her, not that anyone ever dared to ask her anything. Perhaps, this once, she could do something without considering the numerous ways it could go wrong. Miranda found herself intrigued by the beautiful woman in front of her. Not traditionally feminine, but also far from butch - there was an air of confidence and swagger that drew Miranda in.

“And why, exactly, am I pretending to know you?”

The brunette’s eyes sparkled as she leaned closer to Miranda. “See the scruffy boy behind me to your right? When I came home from my last assignment two weeks ago, I kicked him out of my apartment in his spongebob boxers.”

Miranda let out a surprised chuckle at the description. She thought back to two weeks ago - she’d been leaving her lawyers office after signing the final papers, nailing the coffin of her divorce shut. She’d walked out the door to a blast of cold air and - Miranda’s eyebrow arched as she took the woman in front of her in.

“Two weeks ago, New York City was in the midst of a blizzard.”

“And he was in the midst of sleeping with my childhood best friend while I spent two years in the middle of an active war zone. Consequences are a bitch.” The brunette laughed with Miranda. “Tell me, is he looking right at me?”

Miranda tilted her head to the side, glancing around the other woman’s body at the scruffy man child who was scratching his head, staring at their corner with what could only be described as sad puppy eyes. He did not look much different than Miranda’s dog Patricia when she wanted an extra scoop of food.

“Tell me, does he always look like you kicked his dog?” Miranda asked with a glint in her eye. Andy grinned, nodding with a laugh. Miranda touched the seat beside her on the couch. “Come, tell me about how a serious war journalist like yourself ends up at a party like this.”

Andy dropped down beside Miranda, her knee brushing against the editor’s. She angled her body so that she was fully facing the older woman with her back to her ex, pressing their knees together. Miranda felt like her entire leg was burning where it touched the other woman. “A good friend is dating James. The invitation was on the fridge so I decided I’d come to enjoy myself.” Andy chuckled. “Truthfully, I didn’t think he’d have the balls to show up tonight.”

Miranda nodded at the explanation, taking a small sip of her whiskey while she tried to discreetly check out the ex-boyfriend. Her eyebrows raised as she watched him make his way towards them.

“Danger, Roger Rabbit. This way comes boxer boy.”

The brunette chuckled. “Does that make you Jessica Rabbit?” She wiggled her eyebrows as the man child’s voice sounded behind her.

“Andy, can we talk?”

Miranda watched, interested, as the charming smile dropped and an ice cold mask slipped over the beautiful woman’s face as she turned to look at the man.

“We can’t, Nate. I’m a little busy with my date.”

Miranda raised a single eyebrow at the lie, watching as the scruffy man child, Nate, the brunette had called him, glared daggers at her.

“Since when do you date middle-aged women?”

Before Miranda could eviscerate the idiot man, the brunette - Andy, he’d called her - dropped a hand onto her thigh, squeezing lightly. Miranda’s words froze in her mouth.

“Probably since you couldn’t figure out how to give a girl an orgasm. I think three years of faking it between tours was enough, it was time I found someone who understood how to take care of me.” Andy’s voice was sharp while her hand softly trailed up and down Miranda’s leg. The contrast of ice and heat sent shivers down her spine. “I know it’s hard being stuck between looking like a thirteen year old who hasn’t gone through puberty and having a forty year old man’s beer belly, but may I suggest you try not to insult someone I care about while simultaneously trying to win me back? It’s weak, it’s pathetic, and if you’ll excuse me - I’m busy.”

Andy turned away, her icy mask dropping as soon as she made eye contact with Miranda. There was something undeniably attractive about a well placed insult, Miranda thought to herself as Andy mouthed ‘Sorry!’ while biting back laughter.

There was an invitation in the air to let herself be reckless with this beautiful woman. Miranda hadn’t felt so charmed and drawn to someone since long before her daughters were born and as Andy’s hand continued to run up and down her thigh, Miranda couldn’t help but think that there was something poetic about being part of something, even if it was just a small deception to get rid of an annoying ex. Without thinking about it, Miranda’s hand reached out to tuck a loose hair behind Andy’s ear, letting her thumb caress the sharp jawline she found. Out of the corner of her eye, Miranda watched as the man child shook himself out of his daze and reached out to grab Andy’s shoulder. Miranda felt a surge of protectiveness and wrapped her hand around Andy’s hip, tugging her easily to straddle her lap and more importantly, out of reach of Nate before he had the chance to touch her.

“Nathaniel, I do believe you’ve been informed twice now that you’re interrupting our date.” Miranda let her hands drop to Andy’s hips, squeezing possessively. “I’m not someone who is particularly patient, so I suggest you leave.” Miranda hissed out, the feeling of Andy’s body pressed against her sending jolts of warmth throughout her body. Andy leaned closer, pressing a soft, open mouthed kiss just below her ear, causing Miranda to let out a surprised moan. “That - that will be all, Nathaniel.”

Nate ground his teeth together, glaring at his ex and the white haired woman she was with. He opened his mouth to argue that he wouldn’t be dismissed so easily, but instead his jaw dropped open as the older woman cupped Andy’s cheek and pulled her into a fiery kiss. It was clear to him that neither one of them would give him the time of day, and his pride couldn’t take much more of a beating. Grabbing a glass of a mystery liquid off a passing waiter’s tray, Nate let himself disappear into the crowd without a backwards glance.

Miranda pulled back from the kiss, a small smirk on her lips. It had been years since she’d kissed another woman and she’d forgotten just how soft it was compared to the ever-present scruff of a man. She rubbed her thumb along Andy’s bottom lip, fixing her lipstick while the younger woman stared dumbstruck at her.

“I do believe we’ve scared him off,” Miranda said in a low voice, tinged with whiskey and smoke. She took in the dazed younger woman, wondering how far she was prepared to go now that she was a free woman. She decided it would be safest for them both if she was to follow her original plan and head home. “I’m afraid, now that you are suitably protected, I must be going.” She squeezed her hand around Andy’s hip, doing her best to not imagine the two of them in this position with considerably less clothing involved. Andy swung her leg over, dropping back into place beside Miranda with an endearing huff. “Can I interest you in a ride home, Andy?” Miranda rolled the short name around her tongue. “That can’t be your full name.”

She wasn’t sure where the impulse had come from to offer a ride, but she was charmed by the brunette and so rarely did Miranda allow herself to be charmed. Nigel had told her to celebrate and so -

“Andrea, but I only ever hear that when I’m in trouble.” Andy snapped out of her daze and pushed herself to her feet. “I’d love a ride, let me just grab my jacket.”

Miranda raised an eyebrow, smirking. “I’m sure we can find you some trouble to get into, Andrea.” Andy nearly tripped over herself as she turned away to collect her belongings.

“I can only imagine the kind of trouble I could get into with you, lady. Be right back.”

With that, Andy slipped between two models and into the crowd. Miranda watched as the other woman gracefully navigated the packed room, taking in her sharp Ralph Lauren white button up with carefully folded cuffs, tucked into grey Brunello Cucinello cropped pleated herringbone straight-leg pants. It was a rather plain outfit, but on Andrea - Miranda much preferred the woman’s full name - on Andrea, the outfit was mouthwatering. There was a hint of a tattoo wrapped around her left elbow and Miranda couldn’t stop herself from picturing just where it may have extended to and how much skin exactly was decorated in ink.

Miranda snapped back to attention as a very drunk Nigel dropped down onto the couch beside her with a goofy grin on his face. He held his cup out towards Miranda in offering. She stared at the mystery punch for a second before taking the cup and finishing the last quarter of it in a smooth sip.

“To the end of mediocrity!” Nigel cheered.

“To the beginning of extraordinary.” Miranda said, her eyes finding Andrea making her way back through the crowd, leather jacket draped over her arm. She handed Nigel his cup back before leaning over to give him a soft kiss on the cheek.

“I’m leaving now, make sure you don’t make too large a fool of yourself, darling.” Miranda patted her friend’s arm twice before standing to meet Andrea as she arrived back in their little bubble of the party. She heard Nigel knowingly chuckle behind her, but ignored him in favour of giving Andy a long look from head to toe.

“Ready?” Andy asked, offering a curious glance towards Nigel before her eyes returned to hungrily devouring Miranda. The editor nodded and slid an arm through Andy’s, navigating the two of them through the crowd together.


The two women made their way out of the warehouse, shoulders bumping as they beelined for the car. Andy grinned at the older woman's driver as Miranda slid into the seat. As he closed the door, he gave Andy a nod and a small smile as she reached out a hand to him.

"Andy Sachs. Fake date."

Roy gave her a confused laugh as he shook her hand. "Roy. Long suffering driver. We giving you a lift tonight, Andy?" Andy grinned with a shrug as the two of them made their way to the other side of the car. The window rolled down and Miranda's voice floated out from the car.

"While I'm sure that the two of you are enjoying yourselves, I would like to get home before my carriage turns into a pumpkin. Get in the car, Andrea."

Andy gave Roy a sheepish grin as he opened the door for her. She ducked into the back seat, settling into the comfortable leather beside Miranda. The two women sat in a charged silence as the car started moving, their eyes locked on one another as they slowly started to gravitate together. Roy took a left turn and Miranda's hand slid across the seat. At a stop sign, Andy let the momentum shift her towards the middle of the car, her thigh inches from Miranda's hand.

“I’d like to take you on a real date, but I don’t even know your name.” Andy said quietly, dropping her hand on top of Miranda's, lightly tracing the other woman's veins with the tip of her finger, entranced by the goosebumps that covered the exposed arm between them.

“Aren’t you an investigative journalist?" Miranda said breathlessly. "I’m sure you’ll figure it out before you take me out tomorrow, Andrea.”

"Now that's not fair -" Whatever the end of Andy's sentence may have been was cut off as the car swerved, sending the unseat-belted woman flying across the back seat and into Miranda's side. The older woman wrapped an arm around her waist, holding her close as the car swung back the other way, righting itself into the lane.

“Sorry boss!" Roy's voice came back frazzled. "I swear some people in this city think they can get an easy settlement, stepping in front of expensive cars -” Roy carried on with his rant about the idiots of New York City, oblivious to what the two women in the back seat were doing.

Andy, for her part, was flushed with desire. The older woman's hand felt like it was burning against her hip, while Andy's hand had landed high on Miranda’s thigh. Her mouth watered as she brushed her fingers lightly up and down the older woman’s leg, the silk of her stockings driving Andy mad. Her eyes flicked up, meeting the blown pupils of the other woman, their faces inches from one another. Andy leaned in, sliding her hand up to the place where Miranda’s stockings ended and met flesh. As Andy’s fingers danced along the line, she brushed her lips against her fake date’s ear, the smell of sandalwood and lavender invading her senses.

“How will I know what to moan while I think about you tonight, then?”

Miranda’s sharp inhale was all the warning Andy had before Miranda pulled the same move she had inside the party and with a tug and a smooth slide, Andy was straddling Miranda’s lap with the older woman’s hands resting on her hips. The journalist grinned, leaning in to nip at the white haired woman’s ear.

“Something tells me that today’s not the first time you’ve used that move.”

A quiet whirl sounded behind Andy, making her jump. She twisted around to see the privacy screen slide into place, giving the two of them a barrier between Roy and their compromising position. Twisting back to face the handsome woman whose manicured fingernails were scratching down Andy’s stomach, having slipped under her button up, Andy cocked an eyebrow. “Definitely not the first time Roy has seen you use that move, either.” Leaning in, she captured the other woman’s lips in a fiery kiss that had both of them lost in the feeling. Eventually they had to break apart to breathe, foreheads pressed together.

“Andrea…” Miranda said softly.

“Only when I’m in trouble.” Andy quipped.

“You seem like the type that trouble often finds.” Miranda kissed Andy’s lips softly, her nails absentmindedly tracing patterns on Andy’s lower back where her shirt had ridden up.

“Yeah well, some trouble is good for you every once and awhile.” Andy mumbled against Miranda’s lips. They lost themselves in hungry kisses and soft touches as the car travelled smoothly towards the upper east side of New York City, forgetting that anyone else existed.


A light tapping on the privacy screen brought the outside world crashing in around them. Andy grinned as she climbed off Miranda’s lap - chuckling as the other woman fixed her lipstick with a playful glare at Andy. A soft whirl sounded as the privacy screen rolled down an inch and Roy’s voice floated back.

“We’re here. I’ll be around, just knock when you’re ready for me to open the door, Miranda.”

The older woman rolled her eyes as Andy’s face lit up. She voiced her understanding to Roy as she pulled the strap of her Prada bag over her shoulder. With a soft smile, she reached across the seat and fixed Andy’s collar, resting her hand gently on the brunette’s sternum with a soft smile.

“I’ll leave you here then. Until tomorrow, Miranda.” Andy grinned, leaning in to kiss the other woman’s cheek softly. She chuckled as she pulled back, playfully rolling her eyes at The glare she was receiving. “That wasn’t so hard, was it?” Andy murmured. Miranda just shook her head, tapping on the window. As Roy opened the door, offering Miranda a hand to help her out of the car, Andy blew her a cheeky kiss with a smirk. Turning back in her seat, Andy scooped her leather jacket off the floor. She jumped as the older woman ducked her head back in, flashing Andy a dangerous smile.

“I would call that cheating. Until tomorrow, Andrea.”

Andy’s laugh filled the car as the door closed. She heard Roy get back into the driver’s seat and pressed the button to roll the privacy screen down.

“Hey Roy - I’m not too far from here, just the other side of the park. Can we just wait until she gets in the door?”

Roy flashed Andy a grin in the rearview mirror.

“Sure thing, Andy.”

Miranda the name settled into Andy’s mind as she flopped back against the seat. The name was soothing, like the feeling of slipping into a cold pool on a hot day or sitting beside a fire in the dead of winter. She watched the gorgeous woman make her way up the path towards her front door steps, her mind turning over possible dates for the next day when a large shadow overtook Miranda at the front door.

“Roy, who’s that?” Andy asked, her eyes trained on Miranda as the woman jumped and seemed to shrink into herself. Andy was already pushing the door open when Roy’s voice pierced the protective fog that had encased her brain.

“Miranda’s ex husband, I’m calling the cops. Andy - be careful.”

Roy’s warning was lost to the wide open backdoor of the car. Andy was already dashing up to the front steps, her leather jacket fisted in one hand as the other reached out for Miranda. She pressed her body against the older woman’s, wrapping an arm around her waist and pressing a soft kiss to her temple. “Sorry, my love. I nearly forgot my jacket.” She casually draped the leather over Miranda’s shaking shoulders before turning to look the older woman’s ex husband up and down. “I didn’t realize we were expecting company.”

Miranda’s body melted into Andy’s, the relief rolling off of her in waves as the warm leather landed on her shoulders, surrounding her with the scent of sandalwood, vanilla and leather. She let out a soft sigh as a warm hand rubbed small, comforting circles on her lower back. She bit back a smile at the murderous look on Andy’s face as she looked her ex up and down. “We aren’t, darling. Stephen was just leaving.” Her voice was laced with vitriol as she glared at her ex-husband.

“Mira-.” The man reached out, grabbing Miranda’s arm with his beefy hand. Andy let out a low growl as she stepped forwards, putting herself between Miranda and the large man.

“I think maybe it’s in your best interest to get out of here before the cops show up and find you with a broken nose.” Andy said, her voice dangerous.

Stephen laughed, the smell of whiskey overpowering. “Does it look like I have a broken nose, girl?” His hand tightened around Miranda’s arm. The editor gave a small cry of pain, sending Andy into action. Stephen went stumbling back as Andy’s fist connected with his face, a loud crack ringing through the air. She took a sharp breath, shaking out her hand as Stephen cursed, holding his bleeding nose.

“Now you do.” The sound of sirens came screaming around the corner as Andy stepped back, her body completely in Miranda’s space as she stood tall and nudged the other woman backwards, up the steps, determined to keep Miranda and her bleeding ex separate from one another as the cops pulled up. She felt the older woman squeeze her hand tightly before she disappeared from Andy’s back, taking the hint and moving to the top of the steps, shaking hands searching for her keys.

“You bitch!” Stephen spat out as blood dripped through his fingers. He lunged towards Andy. Without flinching, she sidestepped Stephen and grabbed his outstretched arm. Using his forward momentum, Andy dropped to her knee and flipped him onto his stomach, sprawled out on the steps. The brunette twisted his arm back as she stood up smoothly, digging her foot against his shoulder, grinning at the yelp of pain that came out of the drunk idiot's mouth. Andy leaned down, twisting his arm harder.

“I told you it would be better to leave.”

Miranda had finally found her keys at the bottom of her bag, but she couldn’t just leave Andy with her drunk idiot ex-husband. Pulling Andy’s leather jacket tighter around her, she watched with wide eyes as the younger woman calmly took down her ex husband. There was a part of her that was shocked, but the much larger part of her brain was extremely turned on at the skillful display.

Two police officers came running up the path, stopping at the bottom of the steps.

“Uh, Ms, we can take it from here.”

Andy nodded, letting go of Stephen’s twisted arm and pushing off of his shoulder with perhaps more force than strictly necessary, letting the two cops haul Stephan up while she moved up the stairs quickly to Miranda’s side.

“Are you okay?” Andy asked under her breath as the two women watched the officer read him his Miranda rights. Andy smiled at the irony of that while she pressed her shoulder against Miranda’s. The older woman nodded, tangling her fingers with Andy’s.

“Thank you, Andrea.”

Andy grinned, squeezing Miranda’s hand lightly.

“I owed ya one, don’t even think about it.”

They watched the cops put Stephen in the back of the cruiser, staying close until the officers had them step away to each give their statements.

Andy watched Miranda have a quick conversation with Roy as she finished speaking with the officer. The driver gave a smile and a nod to Miranda before wrapping her in a large hug. Andy smiled as she watched the other woman pat him lightly on the shoulder with a light laugh as he put her down. Before she knew it, Andy was wrapped in strong arms and lifted up in a tight hug.

“Thanks for taking care of her, Andy.”

Andy gave Roy a pat on the shoulder as he put her down. Catching Miranda’s piercing gaze over Roy’s shoulder, she grinned.

“I was just faster and stupid enough to put myself in the way of a six foot tall drunk. You made the smart call with 911.”

Roy shrugged. “All I know is that Miranda is lucky you were there.”

The two of them exchanged numbers and large grins before parting with another hug and a promise to get a beer sometime soon. Andy caught Miranda’s eye over Roy’s shoulder, getting lost in the stormy blues as they stared unblinkingly back at her. Whatever Roy was saying sounded like white noise in the background.

“Come along, Andrea.” Miranda’s voice broke through Andy’s tunnel vision. “Your hand needs to be iced. Roy, please go home to your wife, I’ll take good care of our boxer.”

Andy squeezed her throbbing hand into a fist reflexively and flinched. Now that the adrenaline was wearing off, the pain was starting to set in. With a small nod to Roy, who just chuckled and wiggled his eyebrows at her, she followed Miranda up the steps and into the townhouse.

They were barely through the front door when Andy found herself pressed against the wall, Miranda’s lips claiming hers in a deep, frantic kiss. With her good hand, Andy pulled Miranda closer, spreading her stance so the editor could stand between her legs and press her entire body against Andy’s. They only broke apart when the need for air became overwhelming.

“You are quite brazen you know” Miranda whispered, biting at Andy’s swollen bottom lip, releasing it with a small growl.

“Brazen, now there’s a word I like.” Andy smirked, leaning in to kiss the editor softly. “You don’t get anywhere in life without being a little pushy, Miranda.”

“I think I liked you better when you didn’t know my name.” Miranda quipped, stepping back. She locked the door and punched in a long code, securing the alarm system before turning to walk down the hallway. “Come along, that hand needs ice, Andrea.”

Andy nodded, her eyes flicking to her reflection in a large floor length mirror that sat in the corner of the foyer. She gasped at how disheveled she looked. The side seam of her shirt was torn, her knuckles swollen and red and her hair was askew. Andy couldn’t help but smile though. In this moment, there wasn’t anywhere she’d rather be.

“Maybe a new shirt too?” Andy called after Miranda. Giving herself one more long look in the mirror, Andy nodded and followed after Miranda’s voice into the depths of the townhouse.


“Please, move at a glacial pace.” Miranda said in what Andy was sure was supposed to be a biting tone. Her small whimper as Andy’s lips caressed a sensitive spot on her back took away much of the effectiveness of the tone as she carried on, though. “You must know how it thrills me.”

“Shut up and let me enjoy your body, Miranda.” Andy nipped at Miranda’s shoulder to drive her point home. “You’re not in charge right now.”

It hadn’t taken them long to end up in Miranda’s master bedroom. Two abandoned wine glasses sat on the kitchen island and a trail of clothes could be followed from the kitchen to their current position in Miranda’s California king bed. Andy had made quick work of Miranda’s La Perla, tossing it aside carelessly as she flipped the other woman onto her stomach, pinning her down between toned thighs. For her speed at undressing Miranda, though, she was taking a maddeningly slow approach to get to the point.

“Andrea…” Miranda moaned out. “If you don’t hurry up, I swear to god...”

Andy pressed her hands into Miranda’s lower back, pushing herself up to sit up on her knees, Miranda’s ass between her thighs. She dropped a lazy hand behind her, teasing it along the backs of Miranda’s thighs.

“What will God do for you right now, hmm?” Andy dragged her nail along Miranda’s hamstring, a line of goosebumps following the red line she made. “What do you want, Miranda? Use your words.”

Andy’s fingers dipped between Miranda’s thighs, smirking at the wetness she found there and the gasp that it pulled from Miranda’s lips as she carefully dragged her fingers along the crease of her thigh, careful to not let her fingers touch where Miranda needed her most.

“Andrea -“ Miranda moaned, grinding her ass up into Andy, desperate to get some kind of friction.

“Miranda.” Andy singsonged back, enjoying her slow torture of the older woman.

Miranda bit her lip hard. She’d never begged anyone for anything in her life before - but if Andy didn’t touch her soon, she was sure she’d explode. She tried to sneak her hand down her front to give herself some relief, but Andy caught her wrist, pulling it above her head and pinning it there, her front splayed along Miranda’s back, pinning her in place. The older woman let out a groan at the feeling of naked flesh pressed together. She could feel how wet the other woman was as Andy’s hips pressed down against her ass.

“Use your words. All you have to do is ask, Miranda.” Andy whispered softly into Miranda’s ear.

“I’m sure now. I liked you so much better when you didn’t know my name.” Miranda moaned as Andy’s fingers brushed against her swollen folds. “Oh, I-ple...please, Andrea!”

Andy hummed as she slipped off Miranda, nudging her legs apart and slipping two fingers into the older woman easily. “That wasn’t so hard, was it?” Andy bit back a grin as Miranda pushed her hand away and maneuvered herself onto her back. Settling back down, she pulled Andy’s hand back to her dripping center and wrapped a hand around Andy’s thigh, digging her nails into soft flesh. Andy slid her fingers back inside and curled them, rubbing at the rough patch of skin she found, letting out a pleased hum as it drew out another loud whimper from Miranda.

“Andrea…” Miranda’s voice was pleading as Andy slowly worked her fingers in and out of Miranda, peppering soft kisses and bites all over her chest. Long fingers tangled into brunette hair, tugging Andy’s head up to meet Miranda’s in a frantic kiss as the older woman ground down against Andy’s fingers. She moaned into Andy’s mouth. “Harder… right, right there.”

Miranda was close, her nails digging in painfully to Andy’s arm as she got closer.

“Let me hear you, Miranda.” Andy husked out, pressing a firm hand down on Miranda’s pelvis while she drove her fingers hard against the spot that made Miranda moan loudest. The result was immediate as Miranda’s legs began to shake and the whimpers and moans got louder. Andy kept her pace up, pushing Miranda over the edge and drawing out the orgasm until she felt hands pushing at her arms.

“Enough, enough.” Miranda's voice floated out. “I can’t - my god woman. I can’t take any more.”

Andy chuckled, slowly pulling her fingers out, bringing them to her lips to lick them clean. Miranda caught her hand and wrapped wet lips around Andrea’s fingers, dipping her tongue between them. She kept eye contact with the panting brunette as she slowly cleaned herself off of her lover's fingers.

“Oh my god, Miranda.” Andy moaned.

“God won’t do anything for you now.” Miranda teased, shifting down the bed to settle between Andy’s legs and giving a playful nip to Andy’s hip bone. Miranda ran a finger slowly along Andy’s folds, gathering the wetness on her finger, bringing it to her lips and sucking it clean with a pop. Andy moaned.

“You might actually be the death of me.”

Miranda grinned and went to work.

If it wasn’t clear in the car that Miranda knew her way around seducing a woman, the easy manner in which she had Andy trembling under her mouth sealed the deal.

Andy had had sex in her life. A fair amount of it, some would say, with what she considered a good number of people. Never, before Miranda, had she seen stars when she came.

Andy tugged Miranda up, capturing her lips in a deep kiss before sinking into the bed with a content sigh, pulling Miranda with her.

“I’ll have you know I’m usually a three date kinda gal.” Andy murmured, covering her mouth with a yawn. Miranda let out a surprised laugh, moving closer to drape a leg over the younger woman's waist, pressing a soft kiss to her shoulder.

“The warehouse evading your ex, a romantic car ride through Central Park, punching my ex husband and then wine in my kitchen.” Miranda ticked each event off on her fingers. “I think we had three very eventful dates and a wonderful nightcap, Andrea.”

Andy smiled, her eyes heavy with sleep. Miranda’s hand tangled into Andy’s hair, scratching at her scalp. Andy let out a soft sigh, content with her place, truly the other woman had one of the most comfortable beds Andy had ever been in. Within minutes, the brunette was out cold.


Miranda woke up to an empty bed. The sheets beside her were still warm with the imprint of Andy, but the woman was nowhere to be found in her bedroom or the master bathroom attached to it. Miranda splashed cold water onto her face and stared for a long minute in the mirror contemplating the night before. They’d woken up in the dead of night, nose to nose. Very little was said while hungry mouths explored each other. Miranda hadn’t expected to wake up alone.

A crash from downstairs pulled Miranda’s focus away from introspection. Pulling her grey robe off the hook and wrapping it around herself, she glanced towards her side table, frowning at the absence of her cellphone. Retracing her evening quickly, she realized it must be at the bottom of her bag, flung to the side when she and Andrea had entered the house last night. The only thing that kept her from fully freaking out was that she knew she’d armed the alarm before icing Andrea’s hand the night before which must mean the crashing and banging and music she heard coming from the kitchen had to be the brunette.

Miranda made her way down the stairs, noting the lack of clothing that she was sure the two of them had left behind the night before. Coming to the bottom of the stairs, Miranda stopped in front of the large mirror, taking herself in. She looked alive for the first time in a long time. She felt like a live wire. Every inch of her was present in this moment, and Miranda was sure it had everything to do with what was waiting for her in the kitchen. She wasn’t sure what exactly this thing with Andrea would turn into, but whatever it was would be worth investing time and energy into. Giving herself a nod, she carried on her path towards the noise.

Miranda leaned against the door frame, eyes wide at what she’d found. Andy was dancing around the kitchen in her button up from the night before and a pair of boyshorts underwear that Miranda was pretty sure came from her drawer. On either side of her, each brandishing a wooden spoon as a microphone were Miranda’s 17 year-old twins.

The three women were in a full sing-along to some Taylor Swift song the twins had been blasting for weeks. While they danced, four separate pans cooked on the stove and something baked in the oven, the aroma filling the kitchen in a way that felt like home which was ridiculous considering this was her home. All three had their backs to the door and had yet to realize Miranda was there as they easily worked together to keep the tune while stirring various pans and flipping pancakes dramatically into the air in time with the music. Miranda bit her knuckle to keep from laughing aloud at the display.

As the song came to a climax, Andy tossed a pancake high into the air, the ark lifting it over her head and behind her back. With a fancy twist, she spun around and caught it in the pan, catching sight of Miranda at the same time. A huge grin broke out on her face as she looked the editor up and down.

“The queen of fashion herself has joined us, ladies.” Andy called out with a cheeky smile. The music turned down as Andy stepped into Miranda’s space, giving her a soft kiss on the cheek and whispering in her ear. “You’re going to have to forgive me, your highness, for not recognizing you last night. I, personally, blame my time spent in a war zone for being recklessly obtuse.” With a grin, she pulled away and went back to the stove while Cassidy and Caroline both rolled their eyes as they made their way over to their mother, each giving her a kiss on the cheek while they navigated her to the kitchen island stools, pressing a cup of coffee into her hands.

Miranda murmured her thanks, inhaling the scent of her favourite Kona coffee blend. After a long sip, she caught Cassidy’s eye and raised a single eyebrow, waiting for an explanation.

“Why’s it always gotta be me?” Cassidy groaned, rubbing her face. “Caroline can explain things too!”

Miranda just took another sip of her coffee and waited while Caroline snickered and Andy watched on, curious, as she turned off the burners and began plating all the food.

Cassidy let out a dramatic sigh, plopping down into the seat beside her mom as Andy set two plates down in front of them. Caroline had hopped up to sit on the counter with her plate in her lap, while Andy leaned on the island, curiously at ease among the Priestly women.

“Caro and I have a Google alert set up for your name. So last night, when news of Stephen broke, we got the notification right away.” Cassidy took a bite of bacon, brandishing the rest of it like a weapon as she carried on. “We called you like a hundred times and when you didn’t answer we convinced dad to let us come home early to check on you.” Miranda’s eyes darted to Andy who was hiding behind a large coffee mug as Cassidy carried on. “So we drove ourselves home in dad’s Porsche -“

“With his permission.” Caroline added, popping a raspberry into her mouth.

“Yes yes, we didn’t commit grand theft auto.” She adopted a slight mocking tone as she spoke back what was clearly a promise made to their father. “We’ll drive it back in two weeks when we go to see him again and we’ll leave it in the garage until then.”

Cassidy rolled her eyes and continued her story.

“As if we’d want to drive in the city. Anyway, we got home and realized that you had company. So we cleaned up the scandalous trail of clothing, did a load of laundry and had a slumber party in the basement so we wouldn’t bother you.”

“And we drank your leftover wine.” Caroline added, holding her mug up in mock salute before taking a long sip of coffee.

Miranda dropped her head back, staring at the ceiling for a long, silent minute. The other three women carried on eating their breakfast quietly until a peel of laughter let loose from Miranda’s chest.

“I’ve decided. I’m giving the two of you back to the zoo.”

The rest of their morning passed by in a blink. The twins offered to clean the kitchen while Miranda took Andy on an adventure to find her clothes from the night before. By the time they re-emerged from the laundry room, the twins had started a movie in the family room with the volume cranked up to movie theatre decibels and a large bowl of popcorn between them.

Miranda plucked the remote from the couch arm, turning the volume back to a regular level.

“Girls, should I have the new Emily book hearing tests for the two of you?”

Cassidy snorted while Caroline turned red and mumbled under her breath, sending Cassidy into a full laughing fit.

“We can definitely hear just fine mom. We just didn’t want to hear what was happening.”

“Caroline Renee!” Miranda couldn’t come up with anything else to say as a blush overtook her cheeks. Andy was absolutely no help from behind her, a knuckle bit between her teeth as her eyes twinkled with laughter.

“Mom, don't stress.” Cassidy said when she finally stopped laughing. “People have sex! We’ve had sex. We just don’t want to hear you having sex.” Cassidy threw a piece of popcorn towards her mom. “Anyway, Andy made us pancakes so, she’s already like - one hundred percent better than Stephen. Let us know when to book the Uhaul for the two of you.”

Andy couldn’t hold back her loud laughter as Miranda dropped her head into her hands in defeat.


“Did I not say you seem like the kind of person trouble likes?” Miranda gestured towards the stairs in the general direction of her daughters. She’d finally managed to convince the twins to release Andy from a very intense Mario Kart tournament they’d started after the movie ended. Miranda called loudly towards the stairs. “Trouble!”

Andy tucked a loose hair behind Miranda’s ear, grinning at the other woman as she stepped closer to her.

“They’re good kids, Miranda. They read me the riot act before you woke up and made sure I knew that if I hurt you they’d hurt me.” Andy frowned slightly. “There was a threat of becoming pig food. So if it’s all the same to you, I’d like to do this right. Let me romance you, Miranda Priestly, editor in chief of Runway Magazine, mother of twin trouble.” Andy pressed her lips lightly against Miranda’s.

“You don’t know me at all, Andrea.” Miranda hated herself for complicating something that felt so easy.

“Sure. But I know that I like the way you say my name, and that I need to regain my honour in Mario Kart against your daughters and honestly? That's enough for now.” Andy took a small step closer to Miranda; a smirk forming on her lips. “Now if you’ll excuse me - I have a date with the devil tonight and I need to go prepare.”

Andy leaned in and kissed Miranda firmly before she could complain.

“I’ve learned that life is too precious to sweat the small stuff, Miranda.” Andy’s brow furrowed. “So many things we think are so important and complicated are really just small stuff. So if it’s all the same to you - I’d like to woo you, woman. I’d like to find out your favourite colour and if you believe in aliens and what you would have named the twins if one of them was a boy. Let me sweep you off your feet, Miranda.”

Miranda nodded, pressing her forehead against Andy’s. “Pick me up at seven, Andrea.”

Andy grinned, stepping back to open the door. She blew Miranda a cheeky kiss, slipping out the front door and practically skipping down the stairs. Nothing was going to slow her down, she had a date with the devil.