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You're Not Looking At Me

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The first time Kanae asked the question, they were drenched in vampire blood, adrenaline coursing through their veins after chopping more heads than one should chop on a regular rogue-vampire-coven raid. It had been Kanae's fourth reincarnation, if Kuzuha remembers correctly (he always does, since Kanae is bad at remembering. He has to be the one who remembers), the Priest and the unexpected ally in the form of a Vampire King.

"Did we partner up for adventures like this as well, in my past lives with you?" Kanae inquired with that falsely sweet tone of his, and Kuzuha stopped dead in his tracks to face him so abruptly that he almost let his sword slash through Kanae's arm. The mortal yelped as he jumped out of the way of an attacking vampire, and Kuzuha decapitated that one without taking his eyes off Kanae.

Kuzuha almost answered with an affirmative, but what came out of his mouth was a bewildered, "Huh?"

Kanae did not hear, or perhaps pretended not to hear, and instead crouched down to inspect the last victim to Kuzuha's sword, then hummed like he did not just squeeze through Kuzuha's chest to grab hold of his heart. "This one's from a different coven. That's weird. Were they planning to form an alliance, do you think?"

"Don't change the subject so lightly!" Kuzuha snapped with what he thought would be his 'scary vampire king' voice, but Kanae being Kanae only smiled up at him and stood up while grabbing a clean piece of cloth.

Kanae tilted his head, just slightly, the way he always did when considering his words. "I am an observant person, Kuzuha. It only took so long for me to notice that you were not always looking at me," he said softly, eyes trained on the machete he was wiping with the ease of someone familiar with the weapon. Kuzuha was then reminded of the first Kanae (he hates to think of him as the original one, as though his other incarnations are...not original)—holding Kuzuha's sword in his hands after sharpening it and asking, 'Will you teach me how to wield your weapon?'

How weird, Kuzuha had thought, that a weapon master didn't know how to properly wield a perfectly ordinary sword. But he said yes anyway, and they practiced enough for Kuzuha to finally trust his old royal sword to Kanae. Later, when he was fighting a group of bandits on a hilltop, Kuzuha would learn that it was not weird at all that Kanae should not be proficient in the art of sword fighting—as he stared astonished between Kanae at a very far distance away lowering his bow (a bow!) and the five bandits lying dead around Kuzuha with arrows perfectly pierced through their eyes.

"There, see?" Kanae's voice brought him back to the present slowly, like being pulled through water towards the surface. When Kuzuha finally surfaced, Kanae was staring at him with a knowing smile and he found that he was staring back. "You're not always looking at me. Sometimes, just sometimes, you look past me and towards a past I would not recognize."

The tone of Kanae's voice turned teasing here, but Kuzuha always knew there was something genuine underneath. "It's quite disturbing, you know, Kuzuha? Seeing grief on your face when you look at me."

"I'm sorry." Kuzuha found himself saying for no reason. He did not question how Kanae ended up with such a conclusion. The other man had always been too intelligent for his own good.

"There is nothing to apologize for, Kuzuha. I merely wanted to know."

"Huh?" Kuzuha started to feel like an idiot now, and it really wasn't his own fault that his mind was having a hard time catching up. There hadn't been any incarnation of Kanae up until then who realized that he was, in fact, a reincarnation. Even if they always end up by Kuzuha's side one way or another, not one ever questioned the way they seem perfect for each other.

"Did we do this kind of thing too, in your past? Fighting bad guys and all," Kanae swept his hand out to gesture at the vampire coven that was now empty of vampires—well, save for one.

"It's not always a group of rogue vampires rebelling against their King, but I guess we did." Kuzuha answered with slight hesitation. He never had to discuss their past lives before this, safe in his pretense of only having known Kanae once in his life. Trust Kanae to always bring something new for Kuzuha to stress over every single time they reunite.

Humming at Kuzuha's answer, Kanae stepped over a dead body to come closer, his face unreadable as he reached up and pushed Kuzuha's silver locks back before resting a palm on the vampire's cheek. "For someone who guards his secrets like a dragon would his gold, your face is surprisingly honest, Kuzuha."

"Only with you," Kuzuha whispered, voice caught in his throat by a sudden need to kiss Kanae. He looked angelic like this, the cross-shaped pendant resting low from his neck reflecting the shine of the moonlight, his hair a lovely mess under the dim light of the sad little lightbulb hanging overhead, his eyes the beautiful murky grey that Kuzuha loved. He never dared make the first move, never wanted to assume his place in Kanae's life even after the promise they made in the mortal's first life—so he held himself back and settled with slowly taking in the beauty that was Kanae's face.

I am looking at you, Kuzuha wanted to say. Always right at him, because how could Kuzuha not, when every time he meets Kanae again it feels like falling in love for the first time?

"Is that so?" Kanae said, and the fondness in his voice was so unexpected it almost made Kuzuha cry. The vampire might sometimes get lost in reminiscing his past with the previous Kanae's, but if there was something Kuzuha always admired about the other man, it was his complete inability to be predictive.

Kuzuha leaned forward to let his forehead touch Kanae's and closed his eyes. "I'm only this honest with you."

"Kuzuha." Kanae said, letting his machete drop on the floor. "Can I kiss you?"

It was the first time Kanae had made love to Kuzuha so fiercely, amidst the fresh vampire corpses, saying things like not wanting to be shown up by his past selves when it comes to pleasuring Kuzuha. It was ridiculous, because his last incarnation wasn't even into pleasuring Kuzuha. When the vampire voiced that exact thought breathily between his helpless moans, Kanae just kissed him again and whispered 'I love you' into his ear, teeth caught on his piercings, hips stilling as he finished inside Kuzuha.

As they lay together in Kuzuha's bed in his drafty mansion the next morning, Kuzuha considered telling the next incarnations of Kanae the truth about his reincarnations if this was the reward he would get. But after breakfast filled with him giving Kanae recollections of how they met in the past (and of how Kanae would always die in his arms), Kuzuha wondered if the pain of going through past grievances was really worth the mindblowing sex.

 

***

 

It turned out that Kuzuha didn't even need to make a conscious effort to make Kanae aware of the state his very soul had been forced into. Kanae figured it out faster and faster with each reincarnation, which frustrated Kuzuha to no end.

During the lifetime in which they were both frontline soldiers during a war, Kanae knocked their guns together and said in a fleeting voice, "Not your first rendezvous with me, hm?"

Kanae survived only two more battles after that, but Kuzuha cannot bring himself to be angry at whatever deity that wrote Kanae's fate, for he knew that Kanae was content to have found Kuzuha again in this life, to fight alongside each other.

When Kanae somehow became a part of the police force and Kuzuha an anonymous donor to the institution, they curiously ended up spending every Wednesday in each other's company for tea. Sometime after 6 months of regular Wednesdays, on a cold winter evening, Kanae slipped his feet under Kuzuha's thighs and asked, "Do you always meet me, everytime I am reborn?"

Kuzuha raged at him for no reason, burying a giggling Kanae in a mess of torn up throw pillows.

By Kanae's 9th reincarnation, Kuzuha stopped being surprised that Kanae just always ended up knowing.

The man took up flowers, of all things, and opened his own business selling flower bouquets. It was adorable, Kuzuha thought, and a welcome change from the past Kanae's that were always unfailingly drawn to weaponry or any form of fighting. Naturally, Kuzuha became a regular, buying bouquets every so often to put on the dining room table that it eventually drew a bemused stare from his mama the Queen Mother when he refused for the nth time to put a preservation magic on the flowers and threatened his older brothers to leave my flowers alone! Don't you fucking dare touch them!

"You don't have to keep buying bouquets just to see me, you know?" Kanae said, mirth lighting up his pretty, pretty face.

Kuzuha grumbled. "Screw you. I'm doing your business a favor."

It beckoned a pleasant laugh out of Kanae, and then the other man leant forward on the counter to stare at him. "Did I like flowers too, my past selves?"

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Kuzuha exclaimed, but it was not as if he wasn't expecting it.

Kanae laughed again, annoyingly innocent little giggles like he wasn't the biggest tease to ever grace Kuzuha's life. Kuzuha ended up answering that question too, but refused to say anything to Kanae's other questions.

He gave himself a question instead, "Am I getting easier to read? Is this—did I become too lenient in keeping this a secret?"

And Kanae, with one hand around a pair of scissors and the other coming toward Kuzuha to tuck a flower in his ear, answered, "No. I think I'm just getting more and more familiar with you. And I will always question it, I think. So I hope you're always up to answering."

They stayed nothing more than friends this time around, but even if Kuzuha has to rein in his need to wrap two possessive arms around Kanae almost all the time, he couldn't bring himself to be nothing but content. Let his family be the witness of this, what with the amount of teasing he got for coming home everyday with flowers in his hair and in his arms, and a pleased smile on his lips.

 

***

 

The next time they meet again, which is to say this current lifetime, Kanae decidedly does not question it before boldly placing a claim on Kuzuha.

Kuzuha is standing inside a game shop, one deserted enough for him to be comfortable with floating around the place to file through new video games to buy. He has his fingers around a game of racing he has not seen before when he gets lost in his thoughts.

It is both a blessing and a curse, he thinks, that the gates to the nether is finally sealed only after a century following the Lagusa family's ascend to the human world. A blessing, because finally there are no crazy vampires that, after going through the gates, get silly ideas in their little heads about conquering the world and making human beings bow to them as a superior race. A curse, because with the vampires gone, so is any need for him to get out of the house since he now doesn't need to comb through the streets every few weeks in search for rogue vampires.

And so, Kuzuha is really fucking bored. He almost wishes his father would allow him to open the gates again so that he has someone, something, to fight, but even if he is bored out of his mind, it doesn't mean he wants to subject the human world to more chaos.

So, video games. A good way to channel his bloodthirst, he supposes, without bringing about actual chaos.

He is brought out of his musings by a soft pitter patter of footsteps, soft soles padding against floor, and a tiny being latching itself onto his leg. Kuzuha barely keeps himself from screaming bloody murder, thoughts racing back to that one time a rabid raccoon clung to his leg and scared the shit out of him—

"Oniisan!" the being calls, and Kuzuha snaps his gaze down only to be greeted with a familiar hue of grey that looks wrong somehow, and a few seconds later Kuzuha realizes why; it's the 10 year-old body attached to those eyes. Kuzuha has never met Kanae when he is this young, since Kuzuha has never gone out of his way to seek Kanae out, and now he is at a loss at what to do, what to say.

"Oniisan!" the child says again, tugging on his joggers. "Is your name Kuzuha?"

Oh demons below, Kuzuha's mind supplies. Already?

"What's it to you?" he turns his nose up at the child—Kanae?—and tries his hardest to appear irritated. It might not have worked as well as he hoped.

The child—Kanae, it's Kanae, for fuck's sake—nods, seemingly happy with Kuzuha's response and continues his line of questioning, "Are you magic? Can you walk into people's dreams?"

Kanae's been having dreams about me?

"No."

"Okay." Kanae nods, then lets go of his leg to pick up the black cat plushie he discarded to the floor earlier to free his hands so he could attack Kuzuha. Then he whispers, "My name is Kanae and I am going to marry you when I am older."

Kuzuha stares, and only when a woman (Kanae's mother?) runs into the shop with frantic steps looking for Kanae does he reach out and pats the child's head awkwardly.

"Don't count on it, kid," he says, and it might look a little funny had someone been watching, his young teenage vessel calling someone visibly only a few years younger than he is a kid.

Kanae's face brightens like Kuzuha has just accepted his marriage proposal (because that's what it is, a proposal) and says, "Kanae will wait for you, niisan! You were always the one waiting, it's not fair."

It only catches up to Kuzuha hours after Kanae has been dragged out by his sheepish mother and Kuzuha has made his way home only to stare emptily at his console. He's going to wait for me this time.

 

For years following their bizarre first meeting, Kuzuha and Kanae would always bump into each other in the game shop whenever he was there to pick up new games. Kanae is more tactile this time around, Kuzuha notices, always grabbing onto his arm when he excitedly talks about the various neighborhood cats he has befriended. Kuzuha knows Kanae likes to be held—by him specifically, but he was never so open to touches the way he is now.

They talk about nothing and everything when they do meet, their shared interests falling into place together to form the foundations of a genuine friendship, one that burns slow and pleasant, a luxury Kuzuha has not been granted with since the first time Kanae reincarnates.

Unpredictable, Kuzuha reminds himself suddenly while waiting for the loading screen, wondering what other surprises Kanae will bring him this time.

 

***

 

As far as surprises go, this one has to be the worst one yet.

Kuzuha is sat silent on his gaming chair, one hand clenched between his thighs and the other trembling over his mouse as he stares at the monitor.

The universe must hate me, Kuzuha thinks, as the 2D avatar on his screen blinks slowly and turns his head left and right as he talks about losing his childhood memories: I suffer from amnesia, it seems, I can't remember anything from when I was a child.

It's Kanae's voice, Kuzuha knows. The 2D avatar does no justice to Kanae's actual visage, but Kuzuha knows that voice, even if it's the sweet saccharine voice that he always uses on strangers and rarely on Kuzuha, he knows that voice. And he realizes what the voice is telling him; Kanae no longer remembers.

Kanae stopped coming over to the game shop just a little over three years ago, and Kuzuha has never stopped wondering where he and his family went. He berates himself for failing to secure a way of contacting Kanae outside of their meetings at the game shop, assuming he would always count on Kanae to visit the shop once in a while and to tell him when he is planning to move away. Kuzuha sleeps that night with tears in his eyes, and a voice in his head that sounds suspiciously like himself telling him off for letting himself start to hope.

Kuzuha does not respond.

 

***

 

It becomes painfully real, then, when they finally meet as proper Vtuber partners, and Kuzuha sees no recognition in Kanae's eyes. He is aware that this shouldn't hurt him as much as it does, because Kanae always forgets him when he is reborn anyway—but he has never been forgotten after meeting Kanae all in one lifetime.

With past lives, Kuzuha can easily differentiate each Kanae's and meet the latest incarnation without hard feelings of being forgotten. But he has met this Kanae years ago, when he was younger, has shared little smiles and laughs with him and has shared banters about video games and what do you think is the best sushi topping?

Someone in the comments asks if Kuzuha has ever met people similar to Kanae in the past, and he cannot bring himself to answer.

Their coworkers jokingly tease them for being a reincarnation of forbidden lovers from the very ancient past, with the way they fit each other so well, and Kuzuha laughs them off saying that hah! Probably true! What, jealous?

 

***

 

"You always seemed familiar," Kanae points out one day over their unit's third anniversary dinner, emptying his ramen cup. It is a miracle that they went through three years of not talking about this, given how observant Kanae always is. "I always had a feeling we will get along very easily. Well, we actually did, and I'm grateful. It's just odd how familiar you feel. I'm almost convinced you knew me when I was a child."

"Or maybe," Kanae pauses, and his eyes turn cloudy for a second. "Or maybe… even before that," Kanae says, a question not asked lingering underneath that sentence.

Kuzuha does his best to not flinch. Gods, he hates how weak he feels now. And it is not a matter of changing into a younger vessel after decades of being a world weary man in his 30s, he just feels as if his heart has decided to crawl to his wrist and threatens to spill over everytime Kanae is near.

"Maybe. That's a good thing, right?" Kuzuha replies with a playful smirk, popping a bar of chocolate into his mouth.

Kanae goes silent and gives him a contemplative look. Kuzuha's heart skips a beat when he recognizes this look from Kanae's fourth incarnation, when he first asked him the cursed question.

"Yeah, yeah it is."

They clean up their dinner, and Kanae asks to shower first, but when Kuzuha comes tumbling out of the shower an hour later Kanae is still in his bathrobe, sitting on their bed with his head hung.

"Kanae?" Kuzuha approaches slowly and tosses his hair towel aside before coming to a stop and taking a seat next to Kanae on the bed. "What is it?"

"Kuzuha," the other man finally raises his head, his eyes clear as he gazes into Kuzuha's. Kuzuha is hit with a nauseating sense of deja vu when Kanae moves his hand to push Kuzuha's hair back, tucking one strand behind his ear before letting his palm settle on the vampire's cheek, his face unreadable as he seems to try and commit every little detail of Kuzuha's face into memory.

"Kana—"

"Kuzuha," Kanae interrupts and pushes their foreheads together. "Can I kiss you?"

Kuzuha breaks, there and then, and pulls Kanae with him as he falls back into the mattress, his bathrobe falling off his pale shoulders. He wordlessly opens his mouth as an invitation, but Kanae only leans down to lick his upper lip while keeping a considerable amount of distance between them.

"Need to hear it, Kuzu," Kanae rasps, even as his fingers start working to take Kuzuha's robe off.

Kuzuha snarls, "Yes, you idiot," and kisses Kanae, pulling his body flush against his own, teeth clacking painfully against teeth (and fangs) as Kuzuha pours all of his desperation and need into the kiss, pushing away any bit of finesse Kanae tries to bring into it.

"Slow down, you crazy vamp," Kanae wheezes when Kuzuha finally loosens his hug around his neck just enough to let Kanae catch a breath.

"No, it's your job to be the patient one." Kuzuha retorts and pulls Kanae down again for a messy kiss, but before Kuzuha can lock his arms around Kanae's neck again, the other man has caught his wrists and forcefully pins them above the vampire's head.

Kanae, face red and pleasantly erotic, hovers above Kuzuha with a lopsided smile. "It is, so I shall take charge from here, okay?"

As much as Kuzuha wants to say fuck no and pin Kanae down with his thighs to ride him into oblivion, Kuzuha knows from experience that letting Kanae in the lead when he is in this mood is the best thing to do.

"Okay." Kuzuha says, body going lax in Kanae's hold.

As Kanae bends down to leave light kisses along his jaw before setting his assault on Kuzuha's pierced ears, Kuzuha belatedly decides that Kanae forgetting him is not the worst feeling in the world.

This is—as pleasurable and arousing it is, is pure torture. Kanae's mind holds no memories of him every time he is reborn, but his body always remembers. The man instinctively knows to let one thigh lodged between Kuzuha's legs, pressing against his middle because Kuzuha loves humping his cock against Kanae's thigh. He knows to play with his ears while Kuzuha does so, even though Kuzuha never told anyone that his ears were an erogenous spot, going into town with the way Kanae bites into his earlobes and sucks a hickey on the spot just underneath it.

Kanae knows to say, "Let your moans out, Kuzu. I love your voice. Please let me hear them?" because Kuzuha always seems to hold back from being loud when they make love, thinking his voice was not pleasant to the other man's ears.

It hurts Kuzuha to know that Kanae will never have memories of the other times he has rendered Kuzuha into a needy mess under him, but his body clearly remembers how Kuzuha cries louder when Kanae fucks into him with long, hard strokes of his cock as opposed to quick, shallow ones.

What surprises Kuzuha that night, however, is when Kanae moves the hand that he has kept on Kuzuha's hips the entire night up towards his neck and starts squeezing.

"Oh, fuck," Kuzuha gasps, his traitorous ass tightening around Kanae when he feels his airflow suddenly blocked by long fingers. "Fuck, nngh, don't— I'll come if you do that, please," Kuzuha hurriedly starts pawing on Kanae's hand when he feels his orgasm creeping on him faster than he would like.

"Hmm? Is that not what you want?" Kanae asks. Kuzuha feels a little bit insulted that Kanae doesn't sound as gone as he does, his voice firm and unwavering, like this is a walk in the park for Kanae, when Kuzuha is loudly panting with is mouth open and his thighs trembling where they are wrapped around Kanae's waist.

"No," Kuzuha whines when he remembers he has a question to answer and tries to shake his head. "You always… hah! You always last longer. Wanna come with you. Shit, Kana—"

Kuzuha can barely see Kanae's face with his now blurry sight, but he swears he could see when realization dawns on Kanae, and his hold on Kuzuha's neck loosens for a moment.

Kuzuha takes a deep breath, but it was pointless because Kanae then pushes his cock in as deep as he could and keeps it there, his hips moving in circles making Kuzuha jolt every time Kanae does it.

"Yeah? Do my past selves fuck you as well as I do?" Kanae asks in a whisper, to Kuzuha it pretty much sounds like an enraged growl. "Do they make you cry when you come?"

Kuzuha doesn't know what he does with his head when he moves it, but he raspily calls out, "They nev— you never choked me...like this."

"No?" Kuzuha sees Kanae raise his eyebrows, and it gives him pleasure to know that the next jolt of hips comes from Kanae. "This your first time getting off on being choked, baby?"

"Never…" Kuzuha stops to moan when Kanae tightens his hold again, but not as hard as the first time he does it. "Never called me baby either," he manages to say.

"My past self is fucking stupid," is what Kanae says when he finaly leans back again to continue drilling his cock into the thight warmth of Kuzuha's hole, presses against the sides of Kuzuha's neck to choke him again.

Kuzuha would laugh if he isn't seconds away from bursting his load, his unfocused eyes rolling up into his skull as he surrenders and wraps a hand around his own cock.

His ears start ringing and his vision blurs, but all he can think about is Kanae's groans above him and his hand stroking his cock as slowly as he could in a pointless attempt to keep his orgasm at bay.

"Come for me, Kuzu. Don't you dare hold yourself back," Kanae sounds breathless as he leans down to whisper into Kuzuha's ear. "No one says… nn, Kuzu—no one says you can't come twice."

No one but him and Kanae could say that tears fall down Kuzuha's cheeks when he finally releases into his own hands, his own moans and cries only barely drowned under Kanae's loud groans of profanities when Kuzuha clenches around his cock as he comes.

"Kana…" Kuzuha sobs when Kanae pulls out, his cock still red and deliciously hard, and he lets out a sound of confusion when Kanae settles next to him, his breathing slowing down.

"I'm sorry," Kanae says, with a kind of fragility that Kuzuha has never heard from him.

Kuzuha, mind still fogged with the aftershocks of his orgasm, turns his head and frowns at Kanae. "What for?"

Kanae is silent for a few seconds before turning around and pulls Kuzuha on top of him. "You look at me and you expect to see someone who would remember. I'm sorry that I don't."

"Your amnesia..." Kuzuha protests, but Kanae shuts him up with a tight grip on his hips.

"No, it's not even about the amnesia. I know those memories are lost forever and it's not something to apologize for. It's— I know you've known me for more than one lifetime, Kuzuha."

Kuzuha slumps down and lies on top of Kanae's chest. This is not a conversation to be had with cum drying on his cock and Kanae hot and inviting underneath him, but Kuzuha relents. "I have."

"I'm sorry I don't retain memories of those lifetimes."

"It's okay," Kuzuha says, a little bit too quickly, and Kanae being Kanae picks up on that.

Kanae runs his hands up Kuzuha's sides and the vampire lets out a content sigh. "Is it, though?"

Kuzuha thinks of all the time he refuses to approach Kanae first, thinks of all the time he purposefully turns the other way unless Kanae is the one pushing his way first into Kuzuha's life (and he does, every time). He thinks about how if it is Kanae that makes the first move, Kuzuha can at least pretend that this is the first and only time they have known each other.

"No, I guess not." Kuzuha says, and doesn't elaborate.

Kanae takes his answer in stride, like he always does, and moves to prop his back against the headboard properly. "Come here," he says, pulling Kuzuha by the arm with one hand, stroking his own cock back into hardness with the other.

"You cheater. Your stamina is unusual, you know?" Kuzuha says with a pout as he crawls up Kanae's body. He moves to sit on Kanae's lap when the man tugs on his elbow.

"Not there," Kanae says, and manhandles Kuzuha until he is kneeling above Kanae's head, the tip of his cock so teasingly close to his lips.

"Ah?" Kuzuha exclaims as Kanae gently guides Kuzuha's hip forward until his entire length is lodged inside Kanae's mouth. "Ah! Oh, Kanae. That's...that's good."

Kuzuha rocks his hips to a slow rhythm until he feels himself hardening again, his cock sitting heavy on Kanae's tongue. He looks down to see Kanae staring up at him with his lips around his girth, and Kuzuha cannot believe how angelic he looks, mouth stuffed with cock.

"Heh," Kuzuha wheezes when he pulls himself out. "You look so lewd like that."

"Hmm," Kanae licks his lips as he maneuvers Kuzuha around, pressing the head of his cock against the vampire's rim before letting him sink down slowly. "Good to know I make an arousing view for you."

Kuzuha rolls his eyes and starts bouncing on Kanae's lap, little 'ah-ah-ah's spilling from his mouth like a waterfall, then leans forward to kiss his lover.

"In case you've forgotten," Kuzuha gasps out, "you already made me come once."

Kanae smiles one of his genuine smiles, so unbelievably fond that Kuzuha moans when he sees it.

"Oh, I am aware."

Then the devil spawn proceeds to ram his hips up into Kuzuha's like he's possessed, the sound of skin slapping against skin only adding to the arousing mess of moans from both of them. Kanae has his eyebrows drawn together in concentration as he stares up at Kuzuha, the vampire barely registering that he has his tongue out while snapping his hips down to meet Kanae's thrusts.

"So fucking beautiful, Kuzuha. So tight for me, aren't you?" Kanae rambles, and he sounds so out of breath it fills Kuzuha's chest with glee. "Perfect—hah! Fuck, perfect for me. Made for each other, we are."

Kuzuha can only nod, a whimper falling past his lips. "I love you. I love you," he cries, hands scrambling to grab Kanae's before directing them to his neck.

p>Understanding his request, Kanae immediately wraps his fingers around Kuzuha's neck and gives it an almost painful squeeze. "I love you, Kuzuha. Love you so fucking much."

"A–ah, Kana, Kanae," Kuzuha rasps out, a jolt of immeasurable pleasure coursing through his entire being it immediately threatens to push him off the edge. "Come inside—fuck! Come inside me, please!"

Kuzuha barely stops begging when Kanae finally stills his hips and releases inside Kuzuha, sitting up to moan into Kuzuha's mouth as he rides his orgasm. The vampire has no chance to catch a breath when Kanae suddenly gives his leaking cock quick, hurried strokes and lets the hold around Kuzuha's neck tighten a little bit more.

"Come for me," Kanae orders, and Kuzuha does exactly that.

 

Later, when Kanae has made sure that his hands left no marks around Kuzuha's neck and he has cleaned both of them up, Kuzuha would whisper into the messy mop of Kanae's hair, "It's not okay, but at least I get to love you like this, every time. It doesn't matter if you don't remember, somehow you always let me love you. And I'm grateful for that."

Kanae stirs and huffs a tired laugh into the crook of Kuzuha's neck, so in love and very, very fond. "Ku-chan is so sweet. Who knew?" He kisses Kuzuha's skin before falling asleep almost immediately, and Kuzuha cannot help the little smile that blooms on his lips as he looks down at his slumbering partner.

"Only with you."