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She's Not From Here (Various Twisted Wonderland x MILF Reader)

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Ya know, you've been through a list of things.

Things such as waking up in a field full of cows in the dead of night, going toe-to-toe with a flock of wild turkey, and having two chaotic daughters that seemed to make the impossible occur with ease were only a taste of your daily life.

But never, in all of the ridiculous situations you found yourself in, did you ever recall waking up in a coffin.

You didn't panic yet, because it wasn't the first time you woke up in such a tight space, but it was stuffy enough to irritate you. Pushing against the door, you grumbled curses when it didn't even budge.

Wait, where were-

"Cassandra? Bowie?" You yelled out, knocking against the door. Worry coursed through your veins when you were met with silence. Where were they?!

"Momma! Is that you?" The muffled voice of Bowie shouted as you heard tapping on the door. Your lips released a breath of relief, "Are you okay? Is Cassandra there with you?" You questioned, leaning against the wall behind you and crossing your arms.

"She's sleeping, but she's okay!"

"Eh? What's a kid doing here?" A new voice growled. Your fingers twitched, who was this?

"Please, Mr. Raccoon Cat, can you open this door?!" You heard Bowie raise her voice as rapid footsteps followed.

'Raccoon cat? The hell-'

"I'm no raccoon or a cat! I'm the Great Grim, and I need a uniform!"

"Huh? You mean these robes? I'll give them to you, but after you open this door!" Bowie responded, "Promise?"

"Mmmmm… GYA! FINE!" The new voice grumbled.

Instantly, blue flames were outlined on the coffin door, much to your dislike. You pounded against the door, your throat starting to burn as the smoke reached you.

Only a few seconds later, the door flew open and you stepped out. You put your hands on your knees and inhaled the cleaner air with relief, ignoring the raccoons shriek of surprise.

"How- why are you awake?!"

You looked down- yeesh, was it a cat or a raccoon? Shrugging, you kneeled down to properly face Bowie, Cassandra had just woken up.

"Status update?"

Cassandra stood up, "No bleeding or broken bones." She yawned. "Same here!" Bowie chirped.

"We're in an unknown area with a bunch of coffins, wearing strange robe-" You were interrupted by the raccoon cat.

"Hey! That kid still needs to give me her uniform!"

You looked over to Bowie, who was already taking off the robe, revealing the clothes she was wearing before you mysteriously passed out.

"A promise is a promise." She walked over to the raccoon cat with the robe in her hands, retracting her hands when he was about to snatch. "Take it nicely, or I'll take it back." She frowned, ignoring the creature's growls.

He bared his teeth as he took it 'nicely', much to your amusement. You sighed, adjusting the strange matching robes you wore.

You stretched your arms, "Whelp, time to find the owner of this…" You trailed off, taking in the area around you. It was dark and decorated with blue flames here and there. Coffins were floating in the oddest places, all in different angles.

"This is flattering…" You hummed as you walked, holding both of your daughter's hand-in-hand. As the raccoon cat began cackling to himself, you three traveled down the hallways, taking in the strange sights.

'Please let me find someone who knows what the hell's going on?'

You sweat dropped as a painting greeted you with a hearty chuckle. Still, in order to gain favor in this new place, you politely nodded back, much to the talking painting's delight.

"Pardon me, but can you tell me who the owner of this place is and where I can find them?" You asked the painting.

"Why of course, dear!" The painting exclaimed, "His name is Dire Crowley, he's the Headmaster of this place. He passed by here a moment ago, I believe he was looking for you."

Your brows raised, "I wonder why... Do you know where he could've gone? I think there has been a mistake here."

"The Ebony Carriage makes no mistake!"

Cassandra released the most silent shriek you had ever heard as she hid in your robes. You turned around to the owner of the voice, meeting eyes- er, the glowing dots that were where his eyes were, with the 10th strangest man you've ever seen in your life.


"I cannot allow you to let your familiar run wild!" He interrupted, holding up the raccoon cat from before. It no longer wore the robes Bowie gave it, and it was tied up like a wild hog.

'Familiar?' You raised a brow, "My apologies, sir, but that-"

"And are you really that impatient that you had to leave the gate?!" The strange man exclaimed, sighing dramatically. "How did you even get out without the special key?"

You spoke with a twitching brow, "The lid to the coffin was burnt off." You watched as he glared at the raccoon cat.

"It leads back to the suspect." He grumbled. Quickly, his expression switched to realization, "Oh my! The entrance ceremony will soon come to a close, let's hurry now!"

He handed Bowie's robe back to her, "I believe this is yours, young lady." Her eyes brightened as she took it back, thanking him repeatedly.

"For I am gracious, I will not punish you," Your forehead vein popped from holding in your laugh, "Now, we're on our way!"

You followed after him, the grip of Cassandra's hand in yours was incredible, but nothing you've ever dealt with. You rubbed the back of her small hand with your thumb, relaxing the black-haired child only slightly.

Hopefully, this strange man would be able to get you three back home. If not…

Well, the last thing anyone wants is for you, of all people, to step in.

"Headmaster, what is this place? It seems that I'm still dazed from the awakening." You gave a sheepish chuckle, but your daughters knew fully well that you were acting.

Still, they remained silent, because you didn't raise snitches.

The man looked back, "This is Night Raven College, an all-boys school of magic!" He dramatically gestured with one arm as the raccoon cat wrangled in his other hand.

He must've noticed the frown you had, for he added, "We aren't as shallow as rejecting single teen fathers, so do not worry about your girls." He smiled.

You raised a brow, he thought you were a guy. It made sense, you guess? You were tall (about 195 cm), and your voice was deep, but in a more womanly way. Your bosom was a huge giveaway, but the cloak must've messed him up.

Perhaps there was such a variety of boys that he wasn't even questioning you.

"If a girl were to somehow be here, what would happen to her?" You asked with an innocent tone.

"Well, it depends. If she sneaks in with full knowledge that she is not allowed, then she will be punished. Such as taking her magic or having her work in place of the janitor for a year or two."

You sighed, "And if she's innocent?"

"We use the Dark mirror to take her back home, and she must make an oath to never set foot in the school with the intent of becoming a student." He chuckled as you all arrived at a large pair of doors. "We do have parent-teacher meetings, so that's why we must be specific."

You nodded, taking a quick inhale, "Sir-"

He slammed the doors wide open before you could continue, "Absolutely not!" He yelled out, probably answering one of the muffled words you heard before he opened the doors.

You instantly saw that this room was incredibly crowded, yet neatly grouped. Everyone wore the same cloaks you did, was this a ceremony of sorts?

Cassandra returned into your cloak when some eyes landed on her. You didn't blame her, some of these guys had mean looks. You nudged Cassandra out, picking her up to hold her on your hip.

"Oh, he's here." One of the boys in the front spoke.

The headmaster shook his head, "Honestly, I went to go and grab our last student." He groaned, walking to the front stage of sorts. You followed after him with your chin slightly tilted up as the hooded males on either side of you muttered and stared.

You had walked down the hallways of highschool when you were pregnant, this was nothing.

Bowie noticed your confidence, and stuck out her chest with furrowed brows and puffed cheeks. She couldn't keep up the tough facade and started waving at those she caught gazes at. This obviously caused a small uproar of 'aw' in the chamber.

You walked up the steps, where the headmaster, seven other students and a giant mirror stood.

The headmaster added, "Your daughters need to stand to the side as you get sorted. Not to worry, for they can stand with me!" You nodded, putting Cassandra down so she could walk to the side with Bowie.

A face appeared within the large mirror, it was a green full face mask, with netting below the brows. Other intricate designs were found all over the mask.

"State thy name."

"Are we doing first name, last name or last name, first name?" You looked over to the Headmaster, who answered with, "Any one."

"(Y/n) (L/n)." You answered the mirror.

He squinted at you for a moment before he finally said something.

"The shape of thy soul is… I don't know." The mask's face dropped in confusion.

The headmaster choked on air, "Pardon?" Cassandra and Bowie started fumbling their hands out of anxiety when the whispers of the other students grew.

"She has magic, but her soul is nothing that I've come across. It changes shape and color with every second that passes. Therefore, none and all dorms are suited for her."

The crowd behind you erupted with surprise, "A girl?!" "How'd she get in?" "Is she a spy?"

The headmaster's voice pierced through the chaos, "Impossible! The Ebony Carriage has never picked up a woman, or such a soul!"

Bowie and Cassandra ran from him and stood on either side of you, gripping where your legs were from beneath the robes. You rested your hands on their shoulders, standing tall as you looked straight at the headmaster.

Before you could even get a word out, the raccoon cat from before escaped its bindings. "Pah! Then let me take her place!" It growled, causing you to slowly hide Bowie and Cassandra within your robes.

"Stand down, tanuki!" The headmaster bellowed, only agitating you further.

"Unlike that dumb human, I can use my magic!" It gave a nasty grin, "I'll prove it to ya!" The flames in its ears grew.

The red haired boy to your right yelled out, "EVERYONE GET DOWN!"

Instantly, a wave of fire was roaring in your direction. You grit your teeth as you push your girls behind you, where the fire would not come as close as to licking the air around them.

You held up your arms to block, clenching your eyes from the bright blue hues. You weren't afraid, as this was not the first time you were attacked by a blast of fire. Still, it was too bright, and you didn't know if this fire would be stronger than those you've been hit with in the past.

Though, the last few times you made contact, the fire actually hit…

You opened your eyes, to find that the fire that had charged your way was gone. There was still fire all around the room, giving you one of the many glimpses of hell you've had in your life.

"AHH! MY BUTT IS ON FIRE!" A man with a turban shrieked, running around in a panic the fire on his butt attempted to eat through his robes.

Instantly, you threw off your robe, "Twins, Rabbit!" You commanded over the screaming in the room.

The girls quickly ran off hand in hand to an area that had no flames, careful to avoid panicking students and blasts of fire as they safely hid. They both hid behind a giant statue, far from the heat.

Now that they were out of harm's way, you could move around.

You raced over with incredible speed, tackling the screeching male so that he was on his stomach. Using your robe, you suffocated the flames, saving his butt (literally).

The man with the turban stopped screaming, realizing the burning sensation was no longer present. "You saved me! Thank you!" He grinned, sitting up with a bounce.

You nodded, your eyes glued onto the raccoon cat that was now running away from two students. One of which, you recognized to be the one that yelled out for everyone to duck.

Without another thought, you used your robe as a net and scooped up the creature when it got close enough. It started trying to escape, barely poking through the robes' material.

"Anyone o' you magical boys have a skill to immobilize this thing?!" You called out, your grip not wearing once as the creature wriggled in your hold.

The red-haired boy from before snapped out of his shock, racing over to you.




A flash of white, and the creature shrieked from within the bag. You relaxed, resting the robe down and opening it to reveal the creature with a strange collar. It hopped on its feet and began to try and take the collar off.

You ignored what was happening next and rushed over to your wide-eyed girls, their onyx eyes wide with amazement.

They grinned widely, despite tears flowing down their chubby cheeks, and raced over, "Momma!" They cried out in unison, hiding their faces on your robes.

You rubbed the back of your neck, "I keep forgetting that you guys don't know that I'm used to this." You squatted down, tucking strands of hair behind their ears.

"I'm okay, look!" You opened up your arms, "Not a scratch or burn on me! It'll take a lot more than that to take down Momma." You winked, poking your tongue out to the side in a cute manner as you flexed your right arm.

Bowie rapidly nodded, and Cassandra was wiping her tears. "Promise?" Bowie prodded.

You paused, suddenly pulled back to your five year old self.


"Daddy? If Momma didn't go bye-bye, would Grandpa still be mean to me?" Your scratchy baby voice echoed lightly in the white background.

Stinging pain, though inflicted long ago, tingled in certain spots beneath your skin. Your throat was bruised and dry, purple and blue decorating your neck like a forbidden choker.

The faint glow of your father's smile reached your sight, causing a warm, safe feeling to grow in your chest. The rest of his face was blurry, but the love in his smile was enough to keep you from questioning it.

"Nah, he's a bad guy who pretends he can see evil. He was like that to Mommy too."

A hand reached out to you, and you couldn't help but flinch before the hand shakily retracted with realization.

"You'll never have to see Grandpa ever again."

"You promise?"

His hearty chuckle resonated within your fragile bones, shaking your glass heart so greatly. His laugh, despite trying to keep the mood light and positive, made your stomach drop. The crack in his laughter made it obvious that he would break down if he had to keep up this facade.

To pretend that things would return to the way they were before hell crawled out of the ground to take all that you loved.

"I promise."


Your smile weakened, and your eyes dulled at the memory. Finally, you took a deep breath and answered your baby girl.

"Hun', I can't make such a promise in a situation like this. I'll do my best, but I can't guarantee that it'll be safe." You sighed, "But I'll promise, for you both." You gave the two girls a hug as the raccoon cat was being thrown out.

The headmaster coughed to catch everyone's attention, "We had a bit of trouble along the way but this brings the entrance ceremony to a close." Dusting off the imaginary dust off of his clothes, he continued. "Dormitory Heads, please show the new students back to the dormitories."

He paused and looked around, "Huh? Now that I think about it, I don't see the leader for Diasomnia, Mr. Draconia, around at all…" The headmaster trailed off.

A tired voice led you to a handsome young man with a grumpy face. His lion-like ears twitched as he spoke, "That's no different from usual, is it?"

"What? Did nobody tell him about the ceremony?" The boy you saved earlier questioned.

A beautiful man answered, "If you're going to complain, you should've done it yourself." He raised his perfect brows in a mocking manner, as if daring the shorter male to retort.

The boy with the turban replied, "Hmm. But I don't know anything about that guy." He closed his eyes in distress as he rubbed the back of his neck.

You felt Bowie tug at your pants, "That's not nice, is it?" She whispered. You shook your head as you looked among the seven students before you, "Not at all, Dear."

One of the students, the one with lion ears, seemed to have picked up your words and gave you the side eye. You raised a brow and stared back until he finally looked away.

"I was correct." A new voice came from behind you to your left. Bowie peeked around your behind to see who was speaking, meeting eyes with the owner of the voice.

The person walked forward, allowing you to see how short he was.

"I thought he might come but Malleus really didn't." He had an unimpressed expression, "It seems the invitation "never arrived" again."

He turned around, spotting your two girls watching him with awe. He was something out of a fairytale for them! You watched as he gave a small smile, causing Cassandra to look down and for Bowie to wave at him.

The conversation continued, "My deepest apologies. I promise, we didn't intend to exclude you." One of the boys that chased after the creature cooed, not a shred of guilt in his voice.

The redhead from before added, "His aura makes it hard to approach him." He shrugged.

Your brows creased, "What a lame excuse…" You muttered, "If you don't like him, just say that."

The boy with black and pink hair looked back at you with a weird light in his eye. He then sighed, "It's fine. Members of the Diasomnia Dorm can come with me." He passed by once more, sneaking another smile towards you.

"I hope this doesn't upset him…"

Soon enough, the other dorms began to leave. You continued to ignore the stares directed towards you and sighed, waving to the boy with the turban when he grinned at you before disappearing into the hallway.

After about two minutes, it was only you, your daughters and the Headmaster.

The headmaster broke the silence with a sound of distress, "Then, Madam (L/n), I'm terribly sorry about this but.. We must have you leave the school." He hesitated.

You nodded, "Understandable, sir." This seemed to make his shoulders relax.

He continued, "There is no need to worry. The Dark Mirror will send you directly back from whence you came." He gestured for you to walk up to the mirror once more.

You walked up, your girls walking behind you.

"Enter the Gate, and picture your home clearly in your mind." The headmaster instructed.

You closed your eyes, picturing the lovely yet lonely home your family resided in. It was only you and your kids, for you had no other family. At least, no other family that was willing to reach out.

In the midst of your thoughts, the headmaster bellowed, "Oh, Dark Mirror! Guide this one back to the place they belong!"

Silence followed, much to your confusion.

"This happens sometimes, once more." He sent you a smile that told you that this has, in fact, not happened before. "Oh, Dark Mirror! Guide this-"

"It is nowhere." The mirror interrupted.


"The place they belong is nowhere in this world. It does not exist." He emphasized on 'exist' with a very faint hint of sass.

You exhaled through your nostrils as the Headmaster ranted. You only listened in when he asked you a question.

"Where exactly did you come from?"

"I come from (Home Name). Lovely place, with all of its judgemental, hypocritic citizens."

He put a finger to his chin in deep thought. "I've never heard of such a place. I have a general idea of where the students come from, but such a place has never reached these ears of mine." He hummed.

"Let us go to the library."