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i will share eternity with you

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Before Sylvie, Loki didn’t know if he had ever had a day of true happiness. He had some happy moments, sure. Mostly as a child. Sitting on the balcony with Frigga as she showed him little bits of magic, or running around the city causing chaos with Thor. However, the happy moments quickly stopped once he was old enough to start feeling ostracized from his family, his people, and his world.

After that, his life was filled with nothing but pain and suffering. The desire to fit in. The longing to be loved by someone, anyone. His craving for power, because with that he could finally be in control of something in his life.

Then he met Sylvie and it was like a light switch turned on. Suddenly the days were filled with soft smiles and sharp insults and promises that neither of them would ever be alone again. With her, he felt that he had something to truly live for. Someone to live for.

Loki started defining his life as pre-Sylvie and post-Sylvie.

He was happy with the life he had post-Sylvie. He liked the person he had become, the person she had helped him to become. There were more good days than bad days.

Loki often told Sylvie that each day was better than the last because it was one more that he got to have her in his life. She would roll her eyes but he didn’t miss the way her face would flush and she would lean into him slightly, smiling when she thought he wasn’t looking. They still had their moments. Days where they would disagree and fight and not speak for a few hours.

They always forgave each other, of course. The fights would end with soft apologies and strong embraces, both of them painfully reliving the citadel in their minds. Loki would hold onto her extra tightly, a little voice in the back of his mind afraid she would push him away, and Sylvie would hold his face in her hands, promising that she would always be here.

*********

Adjusting to normal, everyday life was difficult; they weren’t even sure what that meant. Neither of them had ever truly lived in peace; her running from apocalypse to apocalypse and him plagued with the crippling desire to feel like a true part of his family and feel in control of his life.

It hadn’t taken them very long to decide where to go. New Asgard had briefly been thrown around, but Loki wasn’t quite ready to have that long and confusing conversation with his brother about how ‘yes, your Loki is dead but I’m still your brother I’m just a version of him from when you and your friends fucked up your time travel. Also, this is Sylvie, she’s technically a Loki but she’s definitely not me’.

Loki knew that none of the Nine Realms would want him there, but Midgard was probably his best bet. They decided on the year 2024 so they didn’t have to be there for the Avengers battle with Thanos. They also knew that they wouldn’t have to worry about running into the other version of himself, his actual pre-nexus event himself, because Loki had been dead for six years.

The two of them had spent their entire lives surrounded by complete chaos, so the controlled chaos of New York seemed like the best fit. When they told Mobius of their plans he was a little wary, seeing that before coming to the TVA Loki had been trying to rule there, but they assured him that they would be okay. They hadn’t really known where to start looking; neither of them had ever lived on Midgard, much less looked for real estate. Luckily, after they had succeeded in helping Doctor Strange fix the multiverse they had annoyed him until he agreed to give them some recommendations on good places to live.

The two got an apartment that overlooked the city. They may have used slightly unethical ways to get it–Sylvie had enchanted the realtor and Loki had whipped up a fake lease–but they didn’t need to tell anyone about that part. The place was smaller than anything Loki was used to living in but large enough for Sylvie, who had never had a real home to begin with.

The first thing in their apartment was a particularly hideous lamp that Mobius had given them as a housewarming present. They both made fun of it once he had left, but were incredibly touched by the gesture, so it remained in their living room.

Eventually, their apartment would be filled with mismatched furniture collected from various places around the city–Sylvie was adamant about finding and buying things for their home because she had never been able to do so–but for now, it was just Loki, Sylvie, and their lamp.

They sat on the fire escape with their backs pressed against the brick and their fingers intertwined, hands resting on Loki’s thighs. There was a comfortable silence between the two as they watched the lights of the city sparkle against the darkened sky. They were both exhausted. It had been a very draining day; moving in and actually starting their lives.

“How are you? Are you doing okay?” Loki asked, glancing over at her. Sylvie nodded and exhaled before giving him a small smile.

“I’m good. I’m happy. And terrified. And I have to keep reminding myself that this is real, that you’re really here.”

Loki lifted their hands and presses a kiss to the inside of her wrist. “I get what you mean. It’s going to take a little while to get used to this. To us being here together with nothing and no one to run from.”

He squeezed her hand, eyes shining as he looked at her.

“I’m here. I’m here and I’m not going anywhere.” Loki started, running his thumb over her knuckles. “You’re it for me. I promise, for the rest of my life I want to be here, right by your side. Okay?”

Sylvie’s face shifted, similar to the look she gave him on Lamentis after he told her she was amazing. Tears form in her eyes and he moves to kiss the crown of her head.

There was still a lot that they still had to work out. Everything that they had been through up until point seemed like the easy part–they had spent their entire lives fighting and running from one thing or another, but now they were in uncharted territory. They had both been with a lot of people, but this, an actual relationship, was new for both of them.

There were times that they were going to mess up. There were moments that they already had. But both of them knew that this was worth it. That they were worth it.

“I love you, you know.” She said softly. Loki wrapped an arm around her tightly before whispering back “I love you, too.”