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We Already Have A Family

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Sometimes Christopher wonders if his dad is blind. Not in eyesight but of view of his heart. Christopher knows he is young and most adult things are stupid and comfusing. This however is easy to figure out, and Christopher can’t believe he was able to see this, but his Bucky and Dad have not.

Chris may be young, but he knows what love is and how it is shown from person to person. He sees it everyday from family, teachers, friends, and especially his Bucky. He knows his Buck loves him more than anything, but it feels different than from anyone else. Bucky isn’t being forced to love or care for him. He can tell buck not only wants to love him, but needs to as well for his own heart.

He’s never heard Buck talk about his past or his family and he figures there is a reason for that. Chris never pushes Buck to talk about it, but he can tell that the past haunts him like the ghost in the closet. Chris guesses Buck’s reasonings might be similar to the reason why his abuelo and abuela only come for rare visits and when they do, it is short.

It isn’t hard to tell that some nights Buck is hiding a deep sadness in him that seems to occupy his mind. When he comes over like this, Chris can tell instantly, it’s the reason why on those nights he almost refuses to leave Buck’s side. Sometimes he wonders if Bucky knows that there is nothing he could do that would make Chris mad or hate him. He doesn’t like seeing his Bucky upset, and sometimes he knows the reason he stays the night is to remind himself that he’s always got a place in their family.

Christopher would never admit it to his dad or Buck, but he was awake the night that Buck came over late. He remembered hearing something about Buck going to eat with his parents. Chris never mentioned it, but he knew that his dad should have gone with him, to be that extra support that Buck needs. That night he heard Buck sob, Chris’s heart broke. He knew that his dad had it under control, but it was almost impossible to not go and run to his Bucky and give him the biggest hug possible. That night Chris knew he would never mention Buck’s parents or what happened, but he would always be there for him when he needed it, because it’s what a true family does.

Things went back to normal for a little while until his dad decided that he was going to start dating again. The night his dad told him, he knew he should have acted differently and not gotten as upset like he did, but he couldn’t believe his father was so blind as to what was in front of him. When asked, Chris will say he likes Ms. Flores, but deep down he can’t like her or want her in his family. He acts nice when she is over and polite, but no matter what his dad says, Chris knows that she isn’t what his dad wants or needs.

Anytime his dad is in a bad mood and Bucky comes over, everything seems to go away. What ever his dad is feeling vanishes and he relaxes as soon as Buck walks through the front door. No matter what anyone else says, Bucky seems to be the only one who can read through his father’s feelings and know what is needed without even asking. Chris even knows that Buck is the only one his dad fully trusts to help them and not be too much. He allows Chris to do activities other’s around him do, but with safety and a grownup nearby in case something happens. Chris trusts Buck with every bone in his body and knows there is nothing that would stop his Bucky from getting to him if he were in trouble. It’s why his Buck knows every secret about him, things he hasn’t even told his dad, like how he doesn’t like Ms. Flores.

Unlike his dad, Chris isn’t blind and can see that his dad misses having a complete family like they once had when him mom was still around. Ever since Bucky came into his dad’s life, the void has slowly been filling. Somehow Bucky has been able to fill a gap that he didn’t even know existed. No matter what the costs are, Bucky has managed to be there regardless if it is wanted or not.

Chris realizes that his dad doesn’t need to look for more family. It’s the reason he doesn’t like Ms. Flores. They already have everything they need to be happy and successful in life. His dad, Bucky, and himself are the only family they need. Chris is happy, his dad is happy, and Bucky seems to always be that connection of pure happiness. He wishes his dad could see what he saw, that they don’t need to keep looking for a family, because they already made one. A family that will last forever and Chris couldn’t be happier, if only his dad saw it too.