“You what?!” Lumine almost spat out her drink as Mona rubbed the back of her head and Scaramouche crossed his arms nonchalantly, “You broke the bed last night? That was what the loud noise was about?”
“..Yeah.” Mona awkwardly cleared her throat, “We might have gotten carried away-“
“We might? We literally broke the bed.” Scaramouche sighed loudly.
“Ah yes, thank you for confirming that.” Mona sarcastically said and rolled her eyes at Scaramouche, “I don’t want people getting the wrong idea about us.”
Lumine watched helplessly between the pair’s ‘banter’, as they would call it.
“What wrong idea?” Scaramouche raised an eyebrow and turned to look at Mona, “I thought everyone knew we were dating.”
“Not that you fucking-“ Mona hands immediately went to smack Scaramouche’s side harshly, causing him to jump in surprise.
“You bit-“ Scaramouche was about to bite back at Mona until they heard Lumine loudly screech in front of them.
“YOU’RE DATING?!” Lumine’s eyes went wide open and her drink was neglected on the side of the table, “Since when?”
“Umm,” Mona and Scaramouche looked at each other expectantly, “Four months ago.” “Sixteen weeks ago.”
“Oh my god.” Lumine rubbed the bridge of her nose by this sudden news, “Ok I wonder how I never knew this until now.”
“Because you’re blind as fuck?” Scaramouche casually suggested with a grin on his face, though he earned a nudge from Mona who was frowning at him.
“Be nice,” She pouted, “But I know that’s really hard for you.”
“No, Scaramouche is right, I am blind.” Lumine was contemplating on how she didn’t see the signs between the pair at all.
“See.” Scaramouche snickered for a while, before he ran his fingers through Mona’s soft hair as the astrologist was staring daggers into his face.
Despite that, he continued to lightly brush and hold onto small strands of Mona’s dark hair, closely inspecting the small speckles of stars that she had added into her hair.
And Mona was silent the whole time, a small flush began to rise onto her cheeks as Scaramouche brought her hair up to his face and he stared.
He stared for a particularly long time until Mona spoke up.
“…What do you think you’re doing?” She pressed her lips together and narrowed her eyes suspiciously at the Balladeer.
“Good, you used the shampoo I bought you.” Scaramouche took a whiff of her soft hair and smirked as he watched Lumine’s face becoming disgusted with them.
“You didn’t need to rub it in, I get it.” Lumine groaned into her hands and she heard Scaramouche snicker to himself.
Just as Lumine was about to bring her head away from her hands, she peeked through the gaps of her fingers and what she saw next almost made her whole jaw drop down to the floor.
Scaramouche just had to grab Mona’s chin in order to make her face in his direction, causing the mage’s blush to deepen. And almost expectedly, Mona looked down at his lips and then back up to his eyes, and the tension between them suddenly thickened. Their faces were close to the point their noses were brushing against each other’s. Their lips were mere moments away from touching-
“Either get a room or please explain what you did last night!” Lumine chastised the couple and slammed her hands onto the table. Which caused the couple to separate by how startled they were from Lumine’s outburst.
“Fine jeez, desperate perv.” Scaramouche scoffed and earned himself an elbow to his side by Mona, “Oi-“
“So we broke the bed because-“ Mona attempted to explain themselves but Scaramouche decided to cover her mouth.
“We banged so hard.” Scaramouche bluntly said and watched as Lumine awkwardly coughed and a massive flush of red appeared on Mona’s cheeks.
“We-! Mmphm!” Mona wrenched his hand from her mouth for a brief moment but he quickly slammed his hand back onto her mouth afterwards.
“It was very satisfying, I felt replenished after it, did you enjoy it Mona?” He continued speaking as he felt Mona wiggle about in his arms, “When-“
“Please shut up, I don’t want details, you fucked, I’m happy for you, stop.” Lumine covered her ears tightly and internally screamed.
“I’m gonna fuck-“ Mona was silenced again.
“Me?” Scaramouche followed on casually. But his eyes immediately widened when he realised what he had stupidly said.
And he wished he could punch himself hard.
“….” Lumine blankly stared at the pair, looking back and forth from Mona to Scaramouche, “…Right so you’re into that stuff, cool.”
“I-No I’m not into that shit!” Scaramouche retorted and snapped at Lumine, who had long lost her sanity by this point.
As Mona freed herself from the hands of Scaramouche, she was about to clear up the confusion in Lumine’s head, but when she saw the amount of embarrassment written all over Scaramouche’s face, she slyly grinned to herself.
“That’s not what you said last night.” She said sophisticatedly, making sure that Scaramouche could hear every single word in that sentence.
“Bitch-! We didn’t even fuck then!” Scaramouche shouted and rolled his eyes.
“Oh wow, did I blow your brains out so hard that you forgot?” She narrowed her eyes mischievously.
“You wish.” A vein popped out of Scaramouche’s head.
“This can’t get any more worse…” Lumine slammed her head on the table, “Mercy, mercy.”
And then Lumine passed out five minutes later.
What actually happened.
“I think you can’t reach the ceiling, lazy ass.” Scaramouche scoffed as he watched Mona go on her rip toes in order to reach something from a cupboard.
“Says you, short dickhead.” Mona sighed in an annoyed manner.
“I’m pretty sure you’re shorter than me, you tiny minx.” Scaramouche shrugged and laid flatly onto the bed.
“I’m the short one?” Ah, good, she sounded pissed, “Then let's test that, shall we?”
The moment Mona mercilessly jumped onto the bed and attempted to touch the ceiling, Scaramouche swore that his back almost snapped.
“Shit-“ Scaramouche’s wind was cut off, “So you wanna play that game huh?”
He smirked as he stood up onto the bed, trying to ignore the pounding pain in his back, and propelled himself from the bed. Just missing the ceiling by a couple centimetres.
“Ha, too much of a coward to break the bed?” Mona commented with a giggle.
“No, you’re more of a pussy for not trying yet.” Scaramouche barked back at her and waited for her to try and touch the ceiling again.
“Hmph! Fine then!” Mona stomped her foot on the mattress and jumped again, but this time, much more harshly than before. She also missed the ceiling by a couple centimetres.
“Ha.” Scaramouche sarcastically said and nudged her as he watched her pout, “I can do it, watch me.”
“I’ll happily watch you fail.” Mona crossed her arms.
“Be my guest.”
And turned out, he did touch the ceiling.
However, the bed snapped in two once he landed back onto the mattress, while also bringing Mona down with him into a loud chaotic crash.
“…I did touch the ceiling-“
“You better pay for the repairs.”