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The Art of Courtship and Miscommunication When Your Boyfriend(sort-of) Is A Wolf(sort-of)

Chapter Text

The first time Bennett does it, Razor nearly goes catatonic from the shock.

“Razor! You’ve got some twigs in your hair!” Bennett exclaims before he oh-so-casually gets on his knees behind Razor, running his fingers through his mane, helping Razor groom himself.

Razor nearly falls off the log they were seated on, eyes bugging out. His eyes shoot around, frantically looking for their third and fourth companion, Fischl and her emergency foo- her bird friend Oz, who had gone off to collect some more firewood.

His ears prick up, at the sound of footsteps cracking twigs and wings beating the air. “Bennett,” he turns, shaking his arm, “Fischl and Oz… coming back. I can hear them.”

He doesn’t want this to stop, Bennett’s paws in his hair feel nice, Razor has always enjoyed intimacy, but well for the sake of Fischl and Oz’s eyes.

“There we go, that’s the last leaf out!” Bennett chirps before planting himself down again next to Razor, just as Fischl crashes through the thicket, “Fear not, for I, the Prinzessin der Verurteilung have returned!” She announces, one arm against her chest, the other holding the sack filled with firewood.

“Thanks Princess!” Bennett stands up, reaching out for the bag, only to trip over Razor’s claymore, discarded at their feet, dropped out of shock after Bennett had started grooming his fur. Razor moves before he thinks, grabbing Bennett by the middle before he can fall. There’s silence, and Razor is conscious of every breath of air Bennett breaths, the freckles on his face, how Bennett’s breath is quickening, perhaps from the fall.

“Thank you Razor!” The green-eyed boy squeaks out before wiggling away for the firewood.

As Bennett feeds the fire, Razor steals glances at Fischl and Oz, it appears neither of them was aware that the two had been flirting, that was good, it might make things a little awkward if they did.

“Razor can I get a hashbrown?” Fischl calls.

Razor nods, leaning over to pass the girl and her bird one of his hashbrowns.

“Oh did Bennett help you pull the twigs out of your hair? That had to feel good!” Fischl exclaims. “Uh- Ah-” Razor stutters, “we-”

“Yup I did!” Bennett responds in his stead, sitting down next to him with a smile. Razor gawks, flushing red.

He didn’t think Bennett would have been that bold about their actions. He pulls his shirt up to cover the red of his cheeks before nodding. “Bennett... clean fur for me.”
“That’s nice!” Fischl bites into the hashbrown with a delighted groan.

Oh perhaps humans were more bold about courtship? He sneaks a glance at Bennett, who is happily digging into a meat skewer.

He likes it, Razor decides.

Chapter Text

They’re without Fischl and Oz today.

Bennett had sought them out in the woods, asking them to come to his house for a surprise, Fischl and Oz were nowhere to be seen. They were on an expedition, Bennett had explained as they made their way to the gates of Mondstadt together.

Razor is nervous, they’re in Mondstadt and they’ve never been fond of being in the city. There are far too many people here who don’t like him, he smells different, he talks differently and there’s not many who would put up with him besides Bennett and Fischl.

Bennett nudges them and Razor nearly jumps out of his skin.

“Hey, the guild’s not too far away okay? We just need to go a bit further in!” Bennett reassures him. He nods nervously, fingers brushing against Bennett’s for comfort, to ground himself. Bennett stops and Razor thinks shit maybe he’s gone too far, maybe Bennett wasn’t ready to take their courtship to that level-

Bennett intertwines their paws.

He. He- we’re-

“This will make you feel less nervous right?” Bennett asks, holding up their hands to show them, gripping their paw a little tighter. Razor doesn’t say anything, but the small nod of his head is enough for Bennett.

“Okay let’s go! Benny’s adventure team!” He declares.

Being pulled by his potential mate through the streets of Mondstatdt, even if Mondstatdt is filled with many smells, many people, too many things he’s not comfortable with, suddenly doesn’t seem too bad.

When they arrive at the guild, Bennett tells Razor to leave their claymore with his sword in the bin. “We have a strict no weapons in the kitchen policy,” Bennett explains. His wolf’s gravestone looks a little funny next to Bennett’s skyward blade, The bin, built for a smaller lighter sword, is hardly tall enough for the large claymore.

“Will it… uh… fall over?” Razor asks.

“Well given my luck, something disastrous will definitely happen! But I’ve learnt not to care too much, let’s go! To the kitchen!” Bennett declares.

Razor walks to the fridge, to see what there is and what they can cook. “No no!” Bennett gasps, slamming the fridge door shut, “go sit there Razor.” He points at the table in the centre of the kitchen.

Bennett follows him to the table as if he’s scared Razor will run away, which is silly. Razor would never run away from Bennett or do anything to distress him, he likes him too much for that.

There’s a grey cloth on the table, which Bennett picks up after Razor sits, back facing the stoves. “I’m going to tie this around your eyes,” he says.

With the cloth around their eyes, Razor is well… a little confused. “Bennett… what are you doing?”

He can’t see Bennett but he can almost feel the smile that he knows Bennett has, “surprise Razor! I’m going to cook for you today!”

Oh. Oh no.

The last time Bennett had tried cooking, he had set their campsite on fire.

And electro and pyro visions were NOT helpful for putting out fires.

A lot of banging of pots, the hissing of oil splattering everywhere and a lot of yelping later, Razor hears the thud of two plates in front of him.

“You can remove the blindfold now.”

His heart warms. On both plates are Bennett’s signature eggs, slightly charred at the edges, he’s “never been able to get them quite right” he had once told Razor sheepishly when they had accidentally gotten stuck in Dadaupa Gorge for two days and were only able to find bird eggs to eat. The other component is an attempt to replicate Razor’s puppy paw hashbrowns.

There’s only three toes instead of four, and they look a little burnt, but they were made for him. Bennett made these for him . Bennett wanted to surprise him .

As Bennett watches him with trepidation, Razor squeezes their eyes shut, says a prayer to Barbatos and pops a bite of the hashbrown in his mouth.

It… tastes good.

He takes another bite and Bennett smiles, grabbing his own plate and digging in.

Out in the living room, a strong gust of wind blows through the window, right against Bennett’s sword bin. But weighted down by Razor’s claymore, the basket does not topple over and cause all the surrounding bins to fall with it as it usually does. Instead, Bennett’s sword simply shifts with a gentle clank, lands against Razor’s claymore.


[Somewhere in Dadaupa Gorge]

This was not a job befitting the Prinzessin der Verurteilung. Fischl huffed, wiping the sweat from her brow. “Perhaps we should take a break my lady?” Oz offered, a bit away from her, working on mining a crystal ore.

Fischl shook her head, “no, for thou must collect-” she glanced at her hand, where she had scribbled down the details of the expedition, “-eight crystal chunks and four white iron ores within the day before sundown!” She declared.

She huffed again, glaring at the accursed rocks before her and her familiar. It was awfully hard to collect ore with a bow but well, a Prinzessin must do what a Prinzessin does.

“This shall most certainly be worth our while my Oz! This shall give my loyal subjects Bennett and Razor time alone together to realise their feelings for each other!” Fischl finished, before she loaded another arrow, determined to chip away at the ores again.

So with renewed vigour, Fischl and Oz continued their work.

Chapter Text

On this fine afternoon, Andrius feels… anxious. He paces the confines of his colosseum. As the wolf spirit paces, sitting on the floor without a care in the world, Barbatos laughs at their old friend’s suffering. “Look at you!” They giggle, “all worked up over giving away your little human son!”

“You are the one responsible for my state of being you miserable pixie!” Andrius snaps. 

Barbatos had flown in a few minutes ago, giggling wildly.

It had been a peaceful morning until Andrius heard the sounds of the winds, and the thrumming notes of a lyre, signifying the anemo archon’s presence, a sure sign that the wind spirit was here to torment him with his annoying tunes and need for alcohol, and constant pining for the Adeptus from Liyue.

However, instead of the usual petulant pouty expression the archon wore when about to complain about their long-suffering crush, or about the Ragvindr boy not giving them any wine, today, Barbatos had a shit-eating grin upon their face.

“Oh Andrius~” they had sung, “your little human pup has a cru-ush on one of my citizens!”

The archon had then proceeded to recount the prayer they had heard from Razor to them. The prayer consisted of letting Razor survive the meal from Bennett because the meal was supposedly some sort of courtship gift.

Andrius felt the sting of slight betrayal.

Razor hadn’t even told him that they were courting a human...

Andrius wondered if that was his fault. He had of course pushed Razor away, but not of his own volition. Razor biologically was human. Spending too much time, alienated him from other humans. Andrius knew being alone was scary, and he would never wish that fate upon anyone.

Not that he cared, Razor wasn’t his pup.

He definitely did not care he did not.

Andrius grunted, he was unaccustomed to humans, but to his knowledge, they held things known as weddings.

“Barbatos…”

“Yes?”

“Tell me about the human custom of marriage.”

 


 

It wasn’t often that Andrius summoned him to talk. Razor had received a message from one of his lupical, “Lord Andrius wishes to see you immediately! Hurry hurry!” she had ushered him, nosing him in the direction of Andrius’s colosseum.

“Hello,” Razor called, signalling to his fath- Andrius, that they had arrived. Andrius appears, sitting down in front of them, looking rather nervous—well as nervous as a wolf spirit could be.

“Razor why did you not tell me you were in the process of getting mated?” Razor blinked, pulling his legs in as he sat down.

“Razor… did not think you would care. Bennett… human. You do not like human,” Razor admitted. Razor had always chased after Andrius’ approval, but after a while, it became glaringly obvious to him that to Andrius, he was human, not wolf, not Andrius’s lupical.

“Yes but Razor, I-” Anrius cut himself off with a huff, looking away. “Come here,” Anrius tapped the floor in front of him. “Closer.” he repeated. Finally, when Razor was at a satisfactory distance, he dropped something, a flash of teal, from his mouth.

“I heard from Barbatos that in human wedding customs, the family should give a dowry to the other,” Andrius started. “And I heard that your little human needs some of Dvalin’s plume, so I…”

“Fath- Lupic- Andrius…” Razor stuttered out. Andrius was giving them his seal of approval, more than that, he was wishing for the happiness of Razor and Bennett. 

“Invite me to the uh, human wedding,” Andrius grunted. “Now go! Do not bother me any longer!” 

Shoving the plumes into his coat, Razor held his paw over his heart. “Thank you, father!” He called, before rushing out, excited to show Bennett this gift.

Andrius huffed, his pup didn’t even notice the slip-up.

 


 

Razor paused on his way back to Mondstadt, suddenly remembering what Andrius had said.

What was a wedding?

Eh, he’d figure it out eventually.

Chapter Text

Bennett was not someone who liked to think too much. He did know a few things though.

  1. He had ridiculously bad luck.
  2. He had three friends, Fischl, Oz and Razor, five friends if he counted traveller and Paimon.
  3. He had a crush on one of the said friends.
  4. He had never given Lisa a reason to find him so why was he drinking tea with her in Knight Jean’s office oh Barbatos oh Barbatos please don’t electrocute me I return all my books on time-

“So Razor huh?” Lisa hums, reaching for the teapot, pouring the hot tea into the delicate china cup, which Bennett eyed nervously. He had heard much about Lisa’s infamous punishments, and he’d rather not get electrocuted if could.

If he broke Lisa’s pretty cup… he doubted he’d even make it out of the door.

“Uhm Miss Lisa,” he spoke up, “I’m sure you’ve heard of my bad luck, I don’t want to accidentally break your cup.” He straightened nervously as the brunette librarian frowned at him. “Darling, it’s just a cup, why would I value a cup more than you dear? Drink up, you’re thirsty, aren’t you? You’ve been dry swallowing since you came in!” She pushed the cup towards him.

“Oh! Do you like it with more sugar maybe? Or perhaps with milk or those boba, they’ve been all the rage in Liyue recently I heard- there’s a shop nearby that sells them, Fischl told me about them, the owners moved from Liyue to here you know!” She smiled invitingly at him.

“With all due respect, Miss Lisa can I ask why you called me here today? I have returned all my books on time! I swear and I know the recent book I’ve borrowed isn’t due for another week-”

“Actually Bennett, that’s exactly why I’ve called you here,” Lisa smiled and Bennett felt his heart quiver. Oh god, he would never be able to tell Razor about his feelings, he would never finish what the book had told him to do-

“I think, you should give this a read as well,” Lisa slid a book over. “You should specifically check out the pages I’ve marked,” she adds, smiling.

A Beginner’s Guide to Wolf Behaviour.

What?

“I think you’ll find the contents… most illuminating,” Lisa gave him a gentle pat on his head, “now go on home to read.”

 


 

An Hour Before 

Fischl wiped at her eyes, sniffing to herself as Lisa served her tea. “What brings you here dearie?” Lisa cooed, patting her head. Lisa was as close to a mother figure as she could get, considering her own parents weren’t the best to her after she had decided to live on as Fischl and join the Adventurers Guild.

Honestly, Fischl didn’t even know why she was crying, she had woken up today, after reading the book on wolf behaviour and decided Bennett needed to see it. But on the way to the library, her thoughts started wandering, if Bennett and Razor got together, where would she lie? What would her place in Bennett’s adventure team be?

For so long, she had always been an outsider, she had always been alone. Would this spell her return to solitude? Of course, she could always withhold this information, but that would make her an awful friend wouldn’t it?

Fischl slid the book across the table, “Miss Lisa, do you think you could give this to Bennett?” She asked.

Lisa’s expression softened as she read the book’s title.

The librarian knelt down, patting her knee reassuringly as Fischl continued to sniffle. “You know Fischl,” she started softly, “I don’t think Bennett and Razor are at all like who you’re thinking of. I don’t think they’re the type to just up and go.”

“When I was younger, around your age or maybe a little older- I’m still young mind you!” She added hastily, “but my friends at Sumeru Academy did get together, and of course I thought the world was over, but I found that we more or less stayed the same, even if my friends did kiss a lot more.”

“But what if they don’t need me on the team anymore because I’ll be interrupting their couple time?”

Lisa shook her head, “well then I suppose a little-” Fischl’s eyes widened as Lisa reached for the catalyst on her waist, “-punishment is in order-”

“No Miss Lisa please don’t kill my friends!” She squeaked out. Lisa smiled, “there you go! You said it yourself, they’re your friends! Now what sort of friends would be ungrateful to the one who’s sacrificed so much for them!”

Fischl smiled, “thank you, Miss Lisa, could I write a note for Bennett before you call him?”

“Of course you can, help yourself.”

 


 

The book was fascinating really, Bennett didn’t know even half of these things, even though his best friend had been raised by wolves. As he flipped the page, he let out a little ‘oh!’ of a surprise as a note slipped out. 

To my loyal subject friend Bennett,

I hope Lisa didn’t scare you too much. But I talked to her and we thought this would help you out with Razor. You two have been the best companions a princess could ask for. I’m not sure how things will change after you read this section so I thought I would write this note first. I hope you will still want me around in your team even after you figure it out.

Yours truly,

Fischl, Prinzessin der Verurteilung.

That was odd, why would Bennett ever not want Fischl in his team? She was cool. An amazing shot with the bow, and he and Razor had both come to love her presence. “Well I suppose even princesses have their off days and insecurities,” he decided aloud, “I’ll give her a hug after this.”

Bennett flipped the page.

 


 

Bennett was running through the streets, trying his best not to trip over his feet. “Fischl!” He yelled, “Fischl!” He grasped the blonde’s hands, “I saw your note!”

“Oh,” the blonde shuffled, “does this mean your adventure team is just you and Razor now? Sorry to have to make you find me to let me-”

“What are you talking about?” Bennett exclaimed, “I came to thank you! I would never have figured it out if it wasn’t for you! And besides,” he pulled her hands up, pulling her in a little closer, “It’s not my adventure team, it’s ours! Yours, mine, and Razor’s, and Oz’s! And anyone who wants to join!”

Fischl’s eyes widened, cheeks reddening, small tears gathering at the corner of her eyes, “Ah Fischl don’t cry!” Bennett panicked, “I don’t have any tissues!”

“It’s okay! Go uhm, go ahead, I’ll catch up, I think Razor’s in Wolvendom today.”

As he sprinted away, Fischl watching him go with teary eyes, Oz landed on her shoulder, wings gently brushing her face, “see?” He said softly, “you are loved, mein fräulein.”

“Yeah,” Fischl wiped at her eyes furiously, “I guess I am.”

 


 

Bennett was runing. “Razor!” He yelled, “Razor!”

Razor.

He liked Razor.

Razor liked him.

Razor!

There was a soft rustling in the trees and Bennett was knocked to the ground with an “OOF!”

“Hi Bennett,” Razor looked at him, comfortably lying on top of him, and Bennett thought to himself that if Razor had a tail, it would most certainly be wagging.

Razor looked pretty like this, Bennett wanted to take a picture of him, file it away, keep it in a box of his most precious things. The sun was streaming down through the leaves, the light dappling the ground around them, illuminating Razor’s light hair.

No wait don’t get distracted Bennett! You came here for one thing!

“You never told me I was courting you in wolf,” He exclaimed, brandishing the book. Razor tilts his head, a soft confusion spreading over his face before the feeling of rejection crept in. “You mean you did not mean it like that?” They said softly, lowering their head. “I’m sorry Bennett,” Razor backed up, “I have… troubled you?”

“What? No?” Bennett gripped Razor’s shoulders before he could run away, “you could never trouble me!” He babbled, “and I do like you! I just didn’t know that was counted as wolf courtship but I was trying to flirt and impress you all the same-”

He stopped.

Perhaps wolf courtship and human flirtations weren’t that different after all. He laughed, throwing his head back as Razor watched him curiously.

But there was one thing wolves did not do (at least he thinks they don’t).

“Razor can I teach you something humans do?” Bennett asked softly.

“I like anything Bennett does,” Razor responded solemnly, looking at Bennett, still looking a bit upset that Bennett hadn’t been courting him with the intention to mate.

Bennett leaned in, placing his lips gently on Razor’s, waiting for the latter to respond. He did, hesitantly, pushing forward. The kiss at best, was awkward, two young boys who knew virtually nothing about how to kiss. It was fumbling, awkward, Bennett didn’t know where to put his hands, and Razor wasn’t sure what to do with his lips.

But Razor’s lips were soft, and Bennett liked how fluffy his hair was, the wild white tufts brushing against Bennett’s cheeks.

Razor liked this human ritual. Bennett’s face was pressed up against his, and the soft smell of what was undeniably Bennett was coating his senses,

Thank you Barbatos, they both thought silently. (This, of course, broadcasted their kiss to Venti, which you can be sure that the former archon then broadcasted to Andrius)

They broke the kiss hesitantly, “that was called kissing!” Bennett explained, flustered. “Oh,” Razor nodded, ‘I liked it.”

The two sat, neither daring to move, neither daring to break the perfect atmosphere they had built together.

Razor paused for a second before continuing on, “Does this mean we are going to get married?”

“WHAT?”

“AH BENNETT? OH OH BENNETT FAINTED BENNETT-”