In all her life, Ymir had never been quite so excited. Normally she was bored or upset. Occasionally Krista would make her feel a number of things she would rather not mention—both negative and positive. But now she was excited beyond measure, so much so that she almost bounced where she stood. Around her was a group of her classmates, all standing around waiting. Krista was beside Ymir, wearing a cute little purple dress with her hair tied up in a ponytail. She looked fantastic, but even the slight show of her cleavage was not enough to divert Ymir’s attention.
Eren and Jean were standing close together, bickering. It was half-hearted, and more to cover their nervousness than anything. Eren wore a simple ensemble of shorts and a t-shirt, while Jean wore a pair of skinny jeans and a tank top.
“Stop being so pissy,” Eren yelled, reaching out to shove Jean by the chest.
Jean cried out in indignation. “You’re the one whining like a bitch!”
Ymir laughed quietly as she watched them, amused and still very much excited. She turned to glance at Connie, who was standing with Sasha and enjoying a conversation. The bald boy had a pair of black shorts on with his favourite rugby shirt, and Sasha wore a pair of white shorts with a green shirt—an ‘I’ll procrastinate later’ logo on the front. She was grinning widely, and by her exaggerated movements Ymir could tell that she was just as excited.
“Ymir,” Krista suddenly spoke up, looking at her small blue wristwatch. “They’re late.”
Ymir shoved her hands into her shorts pockets and shrugged. Thank the goddess she had thought to wear a tank top too. It was getting really hot. “We don’t have to start for another fourty minutes, so being late isn’t that much of a bother.” She began to whistle then, eyes darting around their group as she smiled. Krista felt a wave of nervousness creep over her at the expression—Ymir being this happy about something was never a good thing.
“Do you think they’ll show?” Krista asked.
“They have to.”
And as Ymir predicted, the last of their group finally arrived. Mikasa and Annie calmly walked side-by-side, eyes landing on the group, holding hands. Ymir heard Jean sigh sadly somewhere to her side, and then Eren’s snide chuckle.
“You’re late,” Ymir told them, feigning upset.
Annie didn’t seem to care, but Mikasa at least looked apologetic. “Sorry guys, Armin needed a lift and he called me last minute.”
“Armin?” Eren piped up, stepping around the other to get to his friend. “Where did he need to go?”
Mikasa let Annie’s hand go to accept Eren’s embrace. She smiled as he pulled away. “Just to the library. He needs a book for his groups’ project.”
Eren snorted, having expected that answer. “Totally saw that coming.”
Ymir cleared her throat and waited for everyone to finally give her their attention. “Excuse me, assholes,” she said cheerfully. “But I’m the leader here.”
“More like the main bitch,” Connie muttered. He suffered a hard slap to the stomach by Sasha but a pat on the shoulder by Jean.
Ymir rolled her eyes. “Leader, main bitch, same thing. Anyway, since today is going to be the best day of my life,” she directed at Mikasa and Annie, who were both watching her with interest. “I won’t flip you out. Now, before we all start giving each other kisses and hugs, let’s get down to the reason we’re here.”
Krista bit into her lip, amused at seeing Ymir like this. Rarely did the brunette ever enjoy being the leader of anything. It was always too much of a hassle, but this particular occasion had piqued her interest, and Ymir was determined to drain as much entertainment from this as she could. Krista was most certainly frightened, because she already knew what they were about to do.
“What’s the plan?” Eren asked her.
Ymir’s grin was so wide that Connie screamed, covered his face and dropped to the ground, feigning third degree burns. Sasha laughed hysterically at him, and only when the two stopped playing around did Ymir finally began to explain.
“You know why we are all here. A damn project. But, I have come up with the most amazing concept and we are damn well going to do it.”
“We got your email,” Sasha commented, still laughing softly at Connie. “About your idea.”
“Yeah,” Jean added. “What the hell is up with that?”
Ymir’s grin stretched more, if that was even possible. “Then you’ll all know that on top of getting the best grades for this shitty project, we will also have a fucking blast.”
“Okay, explain it then,” Mikasa challenged. Annie leaned into her, seeking her hand out again.
“Alright! So we have to do a lame social experiment, right?” Everyone nodded. They had a good idea of what Ymir wanted them to do, but her email explaining it had been vague. Probably so that no one would back out until they had to do it. “And the project is due tomorrow, anyway. Even if you hate me for it, you have to do it.”
“You little shit!” Eren yelled, but he seemed more amused than upset. “I was wondering why you waited so long to tell us what we’re doing.”
Ymir’s cackle was downright evil. “Fuck yeah! Now onto the good part. I brought my camera,” she lifted her shoulder bag, jabbing a long finger into it. “We’re going to be recording everything we do today. The teach’ did say that we can submit our project as a video if we want to. It saves us having to write out crap loads of essays.”
“Can you edit?” Annie asked, finally giving in her two cents. “It won’t count if you edit for shit.”
Krista giggled. “No, but I can. I’ve been very interested in video editing lately.”
“She makes these kickass AMVs,” Ymir added, leaning down to kiss Krista’s forehead.
“What the fuck is an AMV?” Annie asked.
“Oh my god,” Connie groaned, turning to stare incredulously at Annie. “Anime Music Video? Anime? You know? The lines with colour in them that move and have developed stories? That some people want to bang?”
Annie stared at him for a moment, not moving a muscle, and then she shrugged. “Oh.”
“Anyway,” Ymir hurried, “Since my midget here has some mad skills with editing software, she’ll go home after this and make our video. She has a crapload of memory sticks too, if you want a copy of it tomorrow. We only need to hand one in with our brief.”
“I have a feeling that I’ll want a copy of this,” Mikasa commented, grinning lightly. She looked down to meet Annie’s eyes, and knew without the blonde having to tell her that Annie would want one too.
“Great, cool. Now back to the explaining,” Ymir continued. “So what we will be recording is ourselves doing weird things in this mall.”
“You said that in your email,” Eren said. “But what weird things, exactly?”
“Wow, Eren actually pays attention.”
“More than you do, you freckled walnut.”
“Can’t say much about your insulting skills though.”
“Eren struggles sometimes,” Mikasa explained. She ignored Eren’s glare and chuckled lightly to herself.
“Guys, just let Ymir explain!” Sasha whined. She had been on the edge of her seat—had she been sitting—since the last of their group had arrived. Just by Ymir’s excitement she could tell that today would be fantastically fun.
“We aren’t murdering anyone or making porn, are we?” Jean asked.
“Jean!” Sasha yelled.
“Anyway,” Ymir interjected. “What we will do is this: I have all of our names written down on slips of paper. I, as the leader, will be drawing the names of the victims. I have another set of slips written down that’ll say if you go alone or with a group, and then how many will be in your group. We’ll select your members with drawing your names. After that, I have another set of papers with different items on them. One item is default, so you all have to buy it and—”
“Wait, we’re buying stuff?” Krista asked. Ymir had excitedly explained this to her just an hour ago, but she hadn’t heard about actually having to purchase anything.
Ymir seemed to deflate slightly, and she sighed in annoyance. “Let me finish, Jesus.”
“Yes, we’re going to buy stuff. But you all need to remember that my mothers are shit rich and I have a credit card that I barely even use.” Ymir produced her wallet and removed the card in question to wave it around on display. “See? So when the first group goes out, the leader takes this shiny card and buys the items.”
“So we’re just going in to buy stuff? How is that fun?”
“The fun part is the stuff you have to buy, and the reactions you’ll get. Once you select your two other objects, you and your group, if you have one, have to enter the store and buy all three items. You can decide how much of each you want, but I think you might not want to get too many.” She snickered, and it raised more than one eyebrow. “This is only round one. As you go around finding the stuff and when you’re paying for it, me and the others will be in the area to observe and record. So don’t try to cheat, you fuckheads,” she pointedly stared directly at Eren and Jean. “I will know, and that’ll defeat the purpose.”
“What is round two?” Sasha asked excitedly. She was ready to start this thing already. The others were starting to look nervous.
“Once we’ve all completed round one, we go onto round two. In your group you have to go to whatever part of the mall and do something weird with the things you bought. What we’re looking for here is reactions—cashiers, store clerks or simple passer-bys. The camera needs to roll at all times.” Ymir felt relieved to have finally gotten the bulk of the explaining done. “Now,” she said, pulling out a few sealed packets from her shoulder bag. “First we need to select a group leader, and then if the leader will go solo or with a group.”
“Ymir,” Connie interjected, lightly sweating. “What is the default item?”
Ymir smirked. When she told him, he paled. “Lube.”
“L-lube?” he asked. “Like… lube lube?”
“Lube for sex, Connie,” Ymir spat. She rolled her eyes. “You have to buy lube among your other two items. If you don’t, it’ll ruin the project.”
“So our aim is to be explicit and see what kind of reactions we get?” Mikasa asked calmly. Ymir nodded.
“See? Mikasa is the most level headed and she gets it.”
“Choose the first leader!” Sasha yelled, jumping now. “I want us to get started!”
Ymir nodded and looked through the small plastic bags until she found the one labelled ‘names’. After opening it, she gave it a healthy shake and then stuffed her hand inside. Everyone held their breath, and because of that Ymir took her time feeling around until she caught a small piece of paper between her fingertips and brought it out of the packet. When she opened the slip and read the name, she grinned.
“Well, seems our first leader is Connie!” She tossed the slip of paper into a nearby dustbin, and then retrieved the next packet. This one was labelled ‘groups’, and Ymir was just as slow this time. It was only when Krista pinched her side hard that she stopped being a jerk.
“Alright, it says here that you have 2 extra in your group.” She picked out two names, and smiled as she read them. “Congratulations Jean and Mikasa, you’re in group one!”
Jean and Connie both began to sweat, while Mikasa smirked lightly before rolling her eyes. Annie seemed highly amused, and she sent Jean a teasing warning glance just for the hell of it.
“Okay, the last thing to pick is your last two items.” Ymir pulled the next bag out, labelled ‘items’, and dug around for two slips of paper. She pulled them out quickly this time, and quietly handed them over to Connie. He blushed immediately.
“Do they even make those?” he yelled, looking to Ymir frantically.
“Of course they do, baldy, or I wouldn’t have listed it!’ She shook her head in disgust, and then she switched her camera on, stuffed the packets into her bag and aimed the camera at Connie. “We’ll be right behind you. And remember, you have to buy the stuff.”
“We need your card,” Mikasa commented. She and Jean had already collected at the edge of the group, and Connie made his way over to them.
“Oh yeah, here,” Ymir handed it over to them and Connie was the one that took it. “Leader has to pay for the stuff, though.” She winked. “Good luck Connie. I’m sure this will be great.”
While Connie, Jean and Mikasa headed to the store, the rest of the group quietly followed. Ymir was snickering almost hysterically, and even Annie couldn’t help but snort in amusement. She had peeked over to see what their items were, and joined with lube, no doubt their experience would be embarrassing. Annie couldn’t wait to see how Mikasa would react. While she was stoic most of the time, she had a hidden side of her that if touched, would let her blush. Part of Annie also simply enjoyed seeing Mikasa flustered. It was both adorable and insanely attractive.
Meanwhile, Jean was muttering softly to himself while Connie walked on, slumped. Mikasa was the only one that didn’t seem disturbed. If anything she looked excited too. Jean couldn’t imagine Mikasa doing something like this, but there she was, walking calmly beside them as they headed into a normal store to buy weird things. He couldn’t believe their items, too. What the hell shit was Ymir even on?
“We will need to act a little,” Mikasa told them just as they entered the large store.
“Act?” Connie asked. “For what?”
“We’re testing the reaction of people around us. We can’t look like nervous teenagers. Make them think that we know exactly what we’re doing. It’ll confuse them more.”
“But Mikasa,” Jean interrupted. “Have you seen what we have to buy?”
Mikasa grinned. “I have.”
Connie groaned. “Why am I even the leader?”
No one felt a need to answer him, so they remained silent. The walk to the back of the store, to the toiletries, was surprisingly long. Connie kept nervously glancing around him, peeking over his shoulder to see if he could spot the others. He couldn’t, and he wondered if they really were following them. But soon they stopped by the aisle that they needed, and then Connie broke out into a fresh blush.
“A-are we seriously doing this?” Connie asked, noticing a young couple entering the same aisle.
Mikasa noticed too, so she quickly wound her arms around both Connie and Jean, pulling them in. “We’ve done a threesome before,” she said loudly. “It’ll be fine.”
Jean sputtered, momentarily captured by intense fantasies. The couple nearby laughed outright before they realized it and covered their mouths. They didn’t leave the aisle, but they quickly turned and pretended to be interested in a nearby shelf of men’s deodorant.
Mikasa released the boys with a chuckle, and reached out to pull a box of condoms from the shelf. “How many will we need?” she asked, almost more loudly than earlier.
Jean squeaked and Connie looked faint. “U-um… three?” Jean suggested, trembling all the way down to his feet.
“We can’t go that long!” Connie suddenly cried. He blushed bright, but a naughty grin tugged at his lips despite his embarrassment. The couple near them seemed to still, and it looked as though they were listening.
“Connie,” Mikasa deadpanned. “We’ll invite the others over. Make it a group thing.”
“But…” Jean caught on quickly, and though he was embarrassed beyond belief, knowing that the nearby couple were listening made him want to laugh. It gave him the courage to finally give in and act. “These aren’t the right size. I’m too big for this.”
Mikasa’s jaw tensed and it took every ounce of control not to burst out laughing. Her face was the picture of calm, however, and she nodded quickly before returning the box and getting another, this one labelled ‘super-size’. “You’re right,” she said. “You broke the last ones.” Connie’s face was absolutely red as he held his breath not to laugh. “Now we need adult diapers,” Mikasa added loudly. She turned to look at the couple that were now openly gaping at them. “Oh it’s not for me,” she told them. She put a hand on top of Connie’s warm head. “Sometimes he can’t handle anal.”
The couple almost stepped back in revulsion. They quickly retreated, disturbed and looking frightened. In seconds they were gone, and both Jean and Connie were finally able to let loose and laugh until they were on the floor, faces blue. If Connie didn’t know better, he would have sworn that he heard familiar laughter not too far away.
After that they collected the lube beside the condoms and then they went to select a small pack of adult diapers. Jean picked fun at Connie about Mikasa’s earlier comment, and the Mikasa merely smirked as the two bickered. The walk to the tills was rather amusing, because Mikasa made sure to display the items in her hands. When one tall girl looked at her in surprise, she winked. The girl almost walked into a shelf, and quickly flailed for balance. She looked both shocked and embarrassed, and finally the three of them could recognize the intense laughter in the distance that could only belong to Ymir.
At the till, Mikasa handed the items over to Connie and indicated that he should walk in front of her. He had forgotten that he was the leader, and suddenly dread caught him. But he knew the rule, and since he was enjoying himself despite the embarrassment, he straightened his spine and stepped up to the cashier with a big, naughty smile.
“Good afternoon!” he bellowed, eyeing the pretty woman’s nametag. “Petra!”
The woman, orange-blonde with warm brown eyes, nodded once and looked to the counter for the items. There was a slight pause, and Connie absolutely expected a response, but then the woman simply scanned them in, asked if they wanted a packet—which he replied yes to—and then bagged their stuff. After paying for it, the three of them left, and Connie was honestly disappointed.
“Seriously?” Jean finally started. “She didn’t even blink.”
Mikasa shrugged, disappointed herself. “Some people get used to stuff like that.”
“But absolutely no reaction?” Connie asked. “We bought three boxes of condoms, four bottles of lube and a damn pack of adult diapers and she doesn’t even blink at us?”
“At least we’re done now. There’s Ymir.”
Ymir was standing with the others, her face red and her grin wide. “Holy shit that was fantastic,” she said as they stopped by her. “I got everything on camera. Mikasa, you were amazing.”
Mikasa felt naughty enough to smirk and wink. “That’s what Annie tells me.”
“Okay, so now we need to select group two! I wonder who the lucky victims will be.” Ymir cackled again, thoroughly enjoying herself. She quickly retrieved the slips of paper and paled.
“Who is it now?” Sasha asked, eager for her own turn.
“Um…” Ymir looked to Annie. “Me. I’m the leader.”
The group laughed, knowing full well after group one’s performance that Ymir wouldn’t be spared. Some of them even hoped that her items were the most embarrassing.
“Who is in your group?” Sasha asked.
Ymir picked another paper, sighed at having selected ‘one extra’, and then quickly picked another name. This time she grinned, and when she looked at Annie again, it was almost predatory. “Blondes just love me,” Ymir said. “Annie gets to tag along.”
Annie didn’t react. It was like a tidal wave of acceptance and resolution swept over her, and then she stepped up to Ymir’s side. “What are our items?”
Ymir selected the papers, both horrified and amused at what they were. She caught herself laughing as she pictured what she could possibly say when they went to get their stuff, and she continued to internally laugh as she grabbed her card from Connie and headed back into the store with Annie at her side.
They decided to get the lube first. So standing where the others had earlier, Ymir bent down and closely studied the different brands of lube. There were a few lone people strolling by them, and Ymir cracked a nasty grin as an idea struck her. Annie had been admiring the condoms when she spoke up.
“Hey Annie, how much lube did we need last time?” She was so loud that an old lady in the next aisle dropped her basket.
Annie shot Ymir a startled look. She immediately recovered and smirked, not about to let Ymir get one over on her. So she stepped closer to her and slipped an arm around Ymir’s waist. “I dunno. Last time your ass could only take up until my wrist.”
Ymir nearly choked on her spit and the people around them stopped what they were doing to stare. The freckles on Ymir’s cheeks darkened as she blushed. The little shit, she thought, slowly growing more angry and amused.
“Our new dildo is huge, too, huh? I told you not to get it, but you insisted…” Ymir smiled devilishly and ignored the pain as Annie’s arm dug into her hip. She snickered lightly, and then she sighed and grabbed the biggest bottle there. “We can always get more if we need to.” She turned to look at the other people staring, and when she did they quickly looked away. Ymir laughed loudly, and with Annie in her grip, she left the aisle to get their other items. They were easy to get. One was a ball of string and the other was a magazine. However, as they stood in front of the magazine shelf, Annie refused to move.
“I’m not touching it,” Ymir insisted, arms crossed. The bottle of lube had been shoved in her pocket while the string was in the other. It looked explicit and wrong, and many people walking by had given Ymir strange looks—the lube was so large that it stuck out to a point where the label was clear as day. The fact that there was a bulge at the other side didn’t make it look any better.
“Just grab the damn magazine, Ymir,” Annie hissed.
“Why can’t you do it?”
“Because I don’t want to.”
A young boy walked past, eyeing them with interest. “Well we fucked up and now we need to start educating ourselves!” Ymir yelled, pointing at the last item on their list. “This is your fault so get it.”
“My fault?” Annie whirled on Ymir, glaring.
Ymir smirked, making sure that the boy walking by would hear this. “You wanted to give me a ride without protection.” She crossed her arms. “Procreation is a thing.”
Annie caught on immediately when she noticed the boy scurry away, his pasty face red. With an almost defeated growl she leaned down, grabbed the Baby and Pregnancy magazine, and then she roughly grabbed Ymir’s shirt and pulled her along to the nearest till. When they placed the large bottle of lube, ball of string and then the magazine down onto the counter, the cashier gave them a strange look. She appeared disturbed, especially by the lube, but kept her comments and started scanning the items in.
Ymir eyed her nametag—wondering what the hell kind of name Nanaba was—and then she nudged Annie and winked. “So I can’t wait to fill your ass with all that lube,” she said loudly.
Nanaba dropped the large bottle, sputtering. She gave the couple a horrified look, and then she quickly shoved the items into a packet, stammered a goodbye and sat frozen in her seat. Ymir held her laugh until they were outside the store with the others, and then she collapsed against Krista, barking in laughter.
“Calm down, sheesh,” Krista said, struggling under Ymir’s weight.
“Did you guys see that?” Ymir howled, tears forming at her eyes. Even Annie was laughing.
“That was great,” Annie said. “But Ymir, you’re a fucking asshole, you know that?”
Ymir nodded, still clutching at her stomach and laughing. “Love you too babe.”
The next leader was Sasha, who was absolutely overjoyed at finally being selected. Her group consisted of her and Krista, and when Ymir had taken the camera back from Eren, the two of them headed into the mall. Sasha skipped happily as they made their way over to the lube first. Krista was more nervous than anything, and she saw Ymir and the others on her way, and couldn’t help but fluster at the amusement on all of their faces.
When they reached the lube Krista did not waste any time. She grabbed the nearest one, hid it against her stomach, and then she and Sasha headed over to the next aisle for their second item, tampons. As they stopped by the selection of tampon brands, a group of teenage girls entered the aisle and Sasha took a breath.
“Krista, what’s a tampon?”
Krista flinched at the volume of her voice. She squeezed her eyes shut, breathed in evenly and then slowly opened them. The girls were closer and apparently they had heard. “You don’t know what a tampon is?”
“Well… I know it’s to… you know…”
“Um…” Krista’s cheeks blazed red as one of the girls looked towards them, looked back to her friends and then laughed. “It’s for your period,” she explained gently. “When you don’t want to wear a pad, and you need a little more reassurance.”
“How do you use it?” Krista shakily retrieved a box and Sasha’s eyes widened as she looked at the diagram at the back of it. “Oh my god, it actually goes inside?” she yelled, horrified. “But… but doesn’t that hurt?”
Krista grimaced at Sasha’s volume and quickly put a hand on her wrist. “Sasha, quiet down a little. Everyone can hear you.”
Sasha immediately slapped a hand over her mouth. “Sorry.”
Krista giggled lightly in an attempt to relieve some of her embarrassment. She was glad to see the girls had left, so she kept the box in her hand and pulled Sasha along with her, wondering when Sasha had learnt to be such a good actor.
Their third item was latex gloves, and thankfully those weren’t embarrassing to get. Sasha laughed as they retrieved it, a little disappointed that it wasn’t an embarrassing trip. She continued to skip as they headed over to a till, excited to see what kind of response they would get. Sasha was already thinking of what weird things they could do with lube, tampons and latex gloves once they got to round two.
Their cashier was a tired looking man, with a deep scowl and distain written all over his face. When Sasha took the items from Krista and placed them down on the table, grinning, the man lifted an eyebrow. Krista noted that his nametag stated ‘Levi’.
“Good afternoon Levi,” Krista greeted, smiling. She hoped to hide her nervousness behind kindness. Levi only grunted and started scanning the few items in.
Sasha rocked on her heels for a moment, and then she laughed. “I wonder what we’ll do with lube, tampons and gloves,” she said loudly, unthinkingly.
Levi seemed amused by the admission, and even more so by Krista’s sudden redness.
“Sasha…” Krista warned, looking redder than a tomato.
Levi chuckled and smirked after, eyes dropping to the lube before lifting to meet Krista’s gaze. “Be creative,” he suggested, and then he chuckled darkly again, finished the process with the card and waved the girls off.
Krista pressed a hand to her face as she and Sasha left, their bag of items dangling between them. When they made it back to the group, Krista finally found it in herself to laugh. She leaned against Sasha and laughed into her shoulder.
“Oh my goodness, Sasha, that was bad.”
Sasha laughed along, proud of herself. “I tried!”
“Holy shit, potato face, I didn’t know you could act!” Ymir exclaimed, reaching out to clap Sasha on the back. Sasha winced.
“I… I wasn’t acting,” Sasha answered, confused and suddenly frightened. “Was I supposed to?”
Connie burst out laughing and pulled Sasha against him. “Sasha can’t act for shit!” he told them.
Ymir and Krista went silent, shared a look, and then sighed. “Let’s just move on,” Ymir suggested. She found that there was only one name left, one person that hadn’t had a chance to go, and informed Eren that it was him. He seemed startled.
“Me? What?” he pondered over, glancing into the small plastic bag to where the slip of paper with his name sat alone. “But that’s unfair!”
“Hey,” Ymir said. “This is the will of the gods!”
“You don’t even believe in gods,” Eren grumbled.
“That isn’t the point.” She waved his irritation off and then selected his items. Ymir had never seen Eren so upset in her entire life, but it was so very amusing. She made sure to announce his items to the rest of the group and just narrowly missed being attacked by him.
“I won’t do it!” Eren yelled, hands balled into fists.
“Aw, come on,” Ymir tried to reason. “We all had to. Now it’s your turn.”
The others shared concerned looks.
“Don’t be a wimp,” Jean called out, arms crossed. He did not budge when Eren’s blazing eyes turned on him.
“Yeah,” Annie agreed. “You yell about being brave all the time. Show it.”
Mikasa didn’t feel like interrupting to defend Eren or encourage him. She simply pulled Annie against her and sent her friend a look, eyebrow lifted. Eren hated being challenged or insulted like this, and everyone knew that he would immediately take the bait.
“Fine!” he roared, grabbing the slips of paper from Ymir’s hand and crushing them in his fist. “I’ll do it!” He didn’t wait and rushed into the store, taking a detour to first get a trolley, unlike the others.
The first thing Eren did was stop by the magazine rack, which was closest to him. His face went blood red as he scanned the different books. If it wasn’t for Jean’s eyes burning into the back of his head, Eren would have quit and stormed out of the mall. But he knew that the dumb horse-face would tease him about it for days. So he stood there, stiff and angry, trying to will himself to grab two magazines that he needed. Just as he was about to, a few teenage boys, a little older than him, stepped up by the magazines to look at the different sports and car magazines. Eren swallowed when one of the boys looked at him.
“Aw man, look at this!” one commented.
“She’s a beauty,” another said.
Eren felt like every person walking by somehow knew what he was there to get. It made his heart pound, sweat collecting in his palms. Eventually he grew tired of standing there like an angry idiot, and then he finally crouched down to the more raunchy section of the magazines, and grabbed two of them—one was a gay porn magazine while the other was a regular porn one. Eren threw both books into the cart, gripped the handle of it almost painfully, and sped down to the back of the mall. If the boys back there had seen him, he wouldn’t know.
As Eren rushed to get the last item, he looked around him in paranoia, expecting someone to stop him and laugh at the contents of his basket. It drove him insane with anger, so when he finally made it to the lube and paused by it, his scrambled brain stopped working and he ended up grabbing an armful of lube and throwing it into his basket. Before he could even make sense of his own panic and embarrassment, Eren was already racing away from the section of supplies to a till. When he got to one he merely dumped the basket onto the counter, took in deep breaths and held the credit card out, patiently waiting for the cashier to finish with the stuff.
As the person—labelled Hanji by the nametag—scanned the objects in, they waited patiently until Eren looked their way. Once he had, Hanji grimaced slightly, and then they smirked and winked.
“Have fun,” they said, packing the last of the lube into a packet and sliding the card through a machine. Eren stood rigid, eyes glued to a spot on the counter. When the payment finally went through, he yelled a goodbye, grabbed his bag and then rushed out of the store. He was so red in the face when he made it back to the others that Mikasa stepped forward to calm him.
“Holy shit,” Ymir exclaimed, staring down into Eren’s packet. “So much lube? What the fuck man?”
“I panicked!” Eren yelled, steadily calming down. “I just grabbed it and ran.”
“We saw,” Jean added, chuckling.
Ymir wasn’t far behind him. “Eren I’ve never seen you look so embarrassed before.”
“How could I not be? It looks like I’m about to murder myself by jacking off!”
Everyone burst into laughter, patting Eren in between to sooth him. He didn’t seem as amused, but eventually calmed down enough to roll his eyes and shrug. After a few more minutes of amusement, he let his upset go and laughed with the rest. When he thought about it then, it was pretty funny.
“I can’t believe we actually did this,” Krista announced. She looked to everyone’s items, blushing lightly. “We have so much lube.” An elderly couple walking by overheard and the woman pressed a hand to her chest in shock. The old man turned back to send them a lecherous grin, and then he was tugged by his wife and scolded.
They all found themselves in another fit of laughter, barely managing to breathe in between. Ymir sobered first, and when she reminded them of round two, everyone else sobered as well.
“So this is the hard part,” Ymir told them. They had all moved into the mall parking lot where a few benches sat. “Since I’m still the leader,” she looked to Connie, grinning, “the main bitch, I will decide where you go and what you do with your stuff. By the way, Eren, I need my card back.”
Eren lifted himself to grab his wallet and then he handed the card back over to Ymir. “You wasted so much money,” he told her.
Ymir shrugged, eyeing the lube and then eyeing Krista. “I don’t mind.” Krista noticed and she blushed, fully aware of what Ymir’s thoughts possibly were.
“Alright, so group one, you guys head to the bathroom in the mall. Connie, put the diaper on with nothing else. Jean, shove a condom over your head. Mikasa, I need you to hang around near the bathroom and then talk to a stranger. Make something up, and then halfway take a bottle of lube out of your pocket and squirt some onto your palm like it’s hand cream. Offer some to the stranger. Then it’s Jean’s cue to show up, greeting Mikasa like you haven’t seen her in a while. The condom must be on your head. Mikasa, act like everything is normal but make sure to keep the stranger there with you. Then Connie comes in, acting normal just like you guys, but wearing a diaper. You three must chat like old friends. The stranger can piss off then, it doesn’t matter. By then you’ll have so much attention. Is that clear?”
Connie, Jean and Mikasa nodded. Maybe it was the fact that they had enjoyed everything until then, but they were surprisingly okay with Ymir’s order.
“Group two,” Ymir continued, grinning. “Annie, you and I are going to head into Babies R Us and stand by some baby clothes. You’ll read the magazine while I stand there holding the lube and string, yelling at you. You should yell back, and I’ll keep asking how it works.” Ymir wiggled her eyebrows. “We’ll see how it goes from there.” Annie shrugged, ready for anything at that point. “Now, group three! Sasha and Krista. You both are to head to the nearest restaurant. When you’re seated, take out the latex gloves and slip a pair on. Then you’ll place the bottles of lube down along with the tampons. Slowly start to cover the tampons with lube and yell about it. Do that until all the tampons are covered, then collect them and leave. Got it?”
Krista hid her face against her hands, shoulders shaking with her laughter. Sasha had to answer for her. “Got it!” Sasha said, wrapping an arm around Krista’s shoulders.
“What do I have to do?” Eren asked, clearly worried.
“You are going to sit down on one of the couches in the middle of the mall, with each bottle of lube you bought and the mags. Sit down with the lube scattered around you and read the magazines. I don’t care if you just page through them, but going too quickly won’t get a good response. Act like you’re really getting into it. You have to read both before you can get up and leave.”
Mikasa couldn’t help but sputter in laughter, and everyone turned to her in surprise. “I’m sorry,” she said quickly, sputtering in laughter again. She quickly covered her mouth with a hand. “I just… Armin is going to die laughing when he watches this.”
Eren had already resigned himself, but he still found the time to complain. The others ignored him, and group one hurried off to do their bit first. After Eren finished with his duty and all groups had done their thing, they found themselves running through the mall to the nearest exit. At their heels ran three security officers, and Ymir was laughing.
“Holy shit, took them a while this time!”
Eren nearly choked on his tongue. “I thought this was a safe project!”
Ymir laughed loudly. “Eren you were reading porn in public.”
Krista struggled to keep up, but Ymir had a grip on her elbow and was helping. Eventually Ymir simple stopped, picked Krista up and then continued to run. Mikasa glanced to Annie when she did and Annie almost immediately ran the other way. Mikasa decided against picking her up, and the two ran with the others.
“This was fantastic!” Sasha yelled, jumping more than running, really. The men behind them were beginning to yell.
“We better get a goddamn fantastic mark,” Jean grumbled. “Or I’m giving freckles to my dog for lunch tomorrow.”
The next day, in the class that had provided the project, the students all sat silently in their seats, frozen. On their faces were looks of shock and disbelief. Even the teacher stood motionless, unsure of what response to make. However, Ymir and her group were rolling on the floor laughing.
Krista had done a fantastic job editing the video. They had to leave most of the audio out, due to how sexual it was, but the video itself was more than enough. The others hadn’t seen the footage of themselves until then, so seeing it from another view was hilarious. Eventually the class seemed to agree, and the students began to laugh as well. Even Reiner, who was Ymir’s long standing enemy, came over to give her a high five.
The teacher decided to simply give them full marks. The other groups hadn’t even put half the amount of effort into their projects, and though the subject of their social experiment had been slightly explicit, it had still been brilliantly done.
And it had been so aptly named, ‘Reactions to the Explicit”.