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I hope that you’re okay

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Sirius Black would do anything for James Potter. If James had a wish Sirius would go out of his way to grant it. He was his brother. 

 

Sirius never prepared himself for the fact that one of them would die on day, and he definitely didn’t prepare himself for it to happen so soon, nor that he’d be the blame for it. 

 

Twelve years of waiting in a dark, cold, disgusting cell, thinking of James. And, oh, how James was funny. After Six years was when Sirius started imagining him, James would sit besides him as Sirius lay on the ground, James didn’t touch him, Sirius didn’t talk, which was a shocker, even James noticed it, laughing and saying ‘Suppose six years of loneliness would do that to ya, hey mate?’ Sirius just cried, which James didn’t tease him for, he never did. If anyone was to understand Sirius it was always James, his best friend. 

 

So, despite all that, when Sirius finally saw Harry he almost threw up. 

 

Those twelve years in azkaban didn’t prepare him for it. He’d almost forgotten that Harry was James’ son until he saw him, and fucking hell did he look like James, just with Lily’s eyes of course. 

 

Then as he and Remus moved into Grimmauld place he saw Dumbledore, he looked wiser, older, but happy. 

 

And he even handed a piece of parchment to Sirius, Sirius wasn’t sure what it was until he read the first sentence of it, he quickly noticed James’ handwriting, having to copy it during Hogwarts when James was doing pranks and Sirius offered to do his homework. 

 

He put off reading it, Remus said it might help him grieve better. Sirius didn’t know what to believe, Remus went to bed after Dumbledore left, leaving Sirius and the note alone down stairs in front the fire. 

 

He couldn’t put it off forever so he opened it fully now, 

 

Deer Pads, (get the pun?) 

 

It read, Sirius snorted, those twelve years didn’t make him any less immature.

 

Lily is worried about it, Peter’s a bastard, thats for sure. I just... Oh, I don’t know.  He won’t get us, Padfoot, don’t worry. I won’t let anyone hurt Lily and Harry. No way. 

 

Sirius started crying, his bottom lip trembled and his eyes swelled. 

 

I say that but yet I am writing this letter, it’s just incase, okay? We’ll all be alright, Christmas dinner will be in a couple months, hopefully by then everything will be sorted over. And then Harry’s second birthday, a leo isn’t he? I remember from when you had that whole astrology phase in third year, bloody annoying prat. Sorry we won’t be able to celebrate Halloween, but Christmas, yeah? Yeah. Tell Moony hi, will you? Always knew it wasn’t him, I trusted you all... My own bloody mistake.

 

Sirius now noticed his hands starting to shake. 

 

Harry had Lily’s eyes. I think they’re beautiful, nice and green. Snivy will be crying his arse off if he ever saw, ha! A little me with Lils eyes. I could laugh about it forever if I could. 

 

The letter become more sirius after that. Maybe, it was then James came to his senses that something bad will happen. 

 

Was always proud of you, y’know? When you showed up to my house after running away, God, I could never forget the sight. You were a mess, pretended not to care though, prat. But, the fact that you came from those horrid, horrid people but are so so... kind, loving, you have such a big heart, Sirius, don’t forget it. Always wanted a brother, and then in first year when we became friends I knew from then on I had one. So thank you for that. 

 

Well, that’s all I’ve got to say. I hope that you’re okay, Padfoot. See you soon. 

 

Love, your deerest dearest brother, Prongs. 

 

Sirius sobbed, almost like a baby. He wished to see James now, it was always James who was there for him. There was no way he could repay him for what he’s done for Sirius. God, how couldn’t you love the man?