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    If only there was some godforsaken way they could communicate faster, it would be a big help to Childe and his blue balls.


    Kaeya is not helping a single bit, sending him letters wrapped to look confidential, only for them to contain the raunchiest, most descriptively vulgar sentences Childe has ever read in his life. It's embarrassing. It's ridiculously inappropriate.


    It is also making Childe so, so horny.


    "Kaeya.." He whines into the empty space of his office, dragging his hands down his face like it'll wipe away the thoughts plaguing his mind. He is becoming increasingly hard, reading the things his lover has deemed salacious enough to put into his most recent letter.


    I miss the way you taste, he reads again, fraying the paper at the edges from constant fiddling, the weight of you in my mouth. Do you remember? You finished too early, the first time. Tell me, what did you think, seeing me on my knees, swallowing you with my greed plain on my face?


    He remembers it so clearly it burns at the backs of his eyelids. Kaeya, before he dropped the "Sir", had nuzzled against his groin like some particularly touch-starved puppy, coaxing him to, to let him taste, as if that was something you would normally beg for. His eyes and his words were like honey dripping slow, tantalizing, tempting as a sight even without its flavor.


    Childe was no blushing virgin, and being part of the Fatui meant witnessing things far worse than casual sexual indulgence. But that night with Sir Kaeya, that first night they had decided their differences could be settled somewhere besides a battle domain, it felt like a revelation.


    Sex with Kaeya is like the thrill of fighting, but with arguably almost more pleasurable outcomes. Kaeya is a force of nature both in and out of the bedroom, but the way he rides Childe with single-minded precision, the way he sucks dick like he's won trophies for it, the way he goads Childe into losing his mind— it's nothing short of addicting.


    And of course, there's the other thing. The L word. The.. elephant in the room, so to speak. He will never bring it up first, even under threat of death, but when the time comes... well, he won't deny it, at least.


    I miss your cock, the letter continues, and the use of the word alone has him twitching pathetically in his pants, imagining it coming from Kaeya's own flushed lips. I miss the feel of it in my hand, hard and full to bursting. Only for me, isn't that right?


    "Only for you," Childe mutters almost absently. He savors every word as if Kaeya is there in the room with him, and if he closes his eyes, he can almost see him too.


    I miss you inside me. Not a day goes by that I don't think about how it feels to be with you, taking all of you, feeling you slick my insides with your desperation. I've opted to have something made— a wooden phallus, if you can believe it; how crude of me— but it doesn't measure at all to the heat of you.


    The mental image of Kaeya using a sex toy while thinking of Childe has him biting at his cheek, clenching his fists in restraint. God, it's insane how much he wants. The man knows exactly what to say every time, and it would be infuriating for Childe if it weren't also stupidly attractive.


    He reads on, fully expecting more scandalous content, but the next paragraph makes him pause, smoothing out the paper onto his desk.


    But I think, out of everything else, I miss your kisses the most. You are always either sweet and deep in turns; keeping me on my toes to guess which you would be every time you would have your mouth against mine is the most wonderful thing. All I could think about is you, and how you will kiss me, until there isn't any other thought left but you and your lips.


    Do you see the power you have over me? Even with this distance between us, I can think of no one but you.


    I think, one day, I will learn to live without missing you so much. One day I will see the part of my bed left unfilled and not think that you should be lying in the space there. But for now I'm left with my thoughts, and they are persistently, loudly, repeatedly calling out your name.


    I hope you come back to Mondstadt soon. Maybe this letter was a bit of motivation, on my part. I do understand that duty calls, though, but know this: for now, the space on the other side of my bed stays empty, and it waits. So do I.







    That... was a lot.


    It's not exactly a characteristic of Kaeya's to get emotional through letters. Hell, it isn't a usual thing, period. But of all the evoking missives Childe has ever gotten from Kaeya, this one takes the cake— because it's one thing to get horny from Kaeya's very talented erotic writing skills, but Kaeya willingly being vulnerable? That's a whole different ballpark.


    It becomes clear to Childe that he is suddenly very, very desperate to see him again.


     He stands up abruptly, clasping his hands together. Obviously, the solution to this is to teleport to Mondstadt immediately. You can't read a surprisingly heartfelt booty call from your normally secretive almost-boyfriend and not run to his side as soon as humanly possible to fuck him stupid. There's probably a rule out there for something like that.


    An assessment of Fontaine's port map indicates that the closest teleport waypoint linked to Mondstadt that probably wouldn't have too many guards getting in his way to ask for a business permit is the one near the fisheries, so that's where he sets his sights to.


    He leaves their HQ as quietly as he can manage the moment it turns midnight, using the new moon's pitch black sky as a cloak to pair with the woolen one he wears to hide his Harbinger insignia. It isn't the easiest thing, travelling via waypoint without being officially logged; only vision users with some kind of high social status can use them at all, so it's obviously a very limited list of people from the get-go. Having the use of them monitored is a safety measure mostly for diplomatic reasons, especially during times of political tension.


    Childe can deal with the consequences of said political tension later with his good looks and the Tsaritsa's favor. Right now, he has a lonely lover to spoil.


    Knocking the waypoint guards unconscious is easy enough, when they're bogged down by sleep. It's not nearly as fun when there isn't a fight, but he doesn't have the luxury of time, energy, or legal circumstance to justify actually goading people into one right now. He just hopes they're knocked out good enough that they won't remember they were knocked out in the first place.


    He triggers the waypoint that connects directly to Mondstadt, channeling elemental energy into his palm, feeling the hairs on his body raise in response to the waypoint's magic resonating with his vision. Just before he feels himself teleport, he hears more guards notice the commotion, frantically running to the scene of the crime.



    Haha. Whoops.






    Kaeya isn't ecstatic about the increased workload they've been having since Varka decided to up and leave for the hills. Sure, it was never exactly smooth sailing as a Captain in the Ordo, but at the very least he was allowed to go home early. Nowadays, overtime is almost always a requirement—if not because of Jean begging him for the help, then it's guilt paired with necessity driving him to work after hours.


    He almost flicks wine at Rosaria every time she looks at him with pity in her eyes when they're at the bar.


    The only respite he's had since the traveler solved the whole Stormterror ordeal was, as much as Kaeya is embarrassed to admit, Ajax's periodic visits. "Ajax" is a recent development borne out of their increasingly frequent correspondence; he'd revealed his birth name somewhere around the 10th time they'd agreed to meet up, ending the night in Kaeya's residence for the first time.


    It's tenuous, really. Their clandestine meetings coupled with their vulgar back and forth are the backbone of whatever it is they're doing, but despite it all he can't help but become... fond of the guy.


    More than fond, if he were going to stop lying to himself sometime soon. Smitten, even. But that day is not today.


    Or so he thought.


    He's dressed in his sleepwear and ready to conk out when there's frantic knocking coming from his front door. It's about 1 am from the last time Kaeya checked, so anything that might warrant that much noise at his door specifically should probably be an emergency. Kaeya groans loudly.


    "Archons," Kaeya whines as he crawls out from under his bedsheets, popping a few joints as he stretches out. He walks the rest of the way to the door barefoot, dragging his feet. "I'm going to quit my job. This much work for this much pay is not worth it."


    He fully expects to see Huffman in hysterics the moment he resigns to his fate, already preparing some choice words for the unfortunate subordinate that had to wake him up at this ungodly hour. When he opens the door, however, he is struck speechless.


    "Hey, uh. You look great!" A soaking wet Ajax says, clutching at a very sad assortment of calla lilies on one hand.


    It dimly registers in Kaeya's head that it's been raining for quite a while, and he'd taken his sweet time answering. Ajax looks like he's been in the rain for a while, and he may be Snezhnayan from head to toe, but no one can withstand the night air while being that wet.


    But really, who could've prepared for something like this?


    "What are you doing here? It's 1 am," Kaeya says, shock most definitely plain on his face.


    Ajax scratches his head, smiling bashfully. "Well, you see... I," He looks away, pursing his lips. "I missed. You."


    "You missed me."




    Kaeya pinches the bridge of his nose. "Ajax, it's past midnight, and you're completely soaked with rainwater, all the way here from what I know has been Fontaine."


    "Yes..." Ajax says again, drawing out the word. He rocks onto the heels of his feet, smiling at Kaeya expectantly, like a child who knows he gets what he wants. "So. Are you.. gonna let me in?"


    Good Barbatos, he's an idiot.


    Sighing, Kaeya wordlessly opens the door wider, gesturing for Ajax to come in, tracking mud and rainwater into his home. Kaeya looks around outside for good measure before locking up behind him, and goes to the cupboard to look for towels to smother Ajax in.


    Once he's pulled out an outrageous amount of towels, he goes back and takes the wilted calla lilies from Ajax's cold hands, pulling out a jar to place them in. Ajax sees him delicately slip the flowers into their makeshift vase, taking great care handling each one, and smiles softly.


    "Hey," Ajax starts, and is immediately interrupted by a towel to the face.




    "Excuse me?" Ajax says, fumbling with the towel to settle it on top of his head. "Is this a come on? Because you know I'm not complaining—"


    "You're dripping onto my hardwood floor, you dummy. Now strip. It's just me you and the Archons witnessing all of this, so you might as well."


    "I hope the Archons aren't a permanent fixture in that equation," Ajax mumbles, but does as he's told, stripping with uncharacteristic shame in his movements.


    Once he's down to his underwear, Kaeya makes it a point to rub him down with another towel himself, mussing up his wet hair a bit roughly. Ajax is silent before him, taking the hair abuse in stride. He knows by now that Kaeya hates being woken up so late, just as much as he hates waking up earlier than he has to, and it's obvious he's a bit contrite about it.


    He looks at Ajax from under the towel and sees him savoring the attention, eyes closed as Kaeya continues to dry his head. It makes something inside Kaeya's chest soften, and he is compelled to gentle his ministrations, wiping down his forehead and ears with significantly less aggression. Eventually, he settles the towel down on Ajax's shoulders, cupping his cold face with warm hands.


    Ajax looks ridiculous like this, face flushed and hair wild and messy all over, looking like an overgrown puppy as he leans into Kaeya's hands. Kaeya sighs. It seems he's losing his touch—he can't even stay mad at an agent of an enemy nation barging into his house after his overtime shift.


    Well, whatever. What's life without a few exceptions to the rule, anyway? He relents and drops a chaste kiss onto Ajax's nose, making him smile.


    "Silly white boy," Kaeya tuts, squeezing the slightest bit at Ajax's cheeks, making them puff up. "You didn't have to go all this way. You could've just wrote to me again."


    "That's the thing though," Ajax says softly, voice warm, "I just thought that this would be... a more direct reply, y'know?"




    "To your last letter," Ajax says, smiling wide. Smug. "You said your bed felt empty without me in it. Naturally, the answer to that is for me to fill it immediately."


    Kaeya stops, shoulders stiffening.


    There is something that isn't clicking, from what Ajax just said. The last letter had been Ajax's, from what he remembers, and last night he'd ended up drinking instead of finishing up the letter he was going to send back. His usual fare was of the raunchy type, and he'd made sure not to disappoint writing his next missive, but that night he was feeling particularly sentimental, and wrote down a lot of things from his stream of consciousness.


    But he knows he didn't send that one. He doesn't remember anything about sending—




    Kaeya's heart rate picks up significantly. 




    Oh no.


    "You... I didn't. I didn't mean to send that."




    "I mean," Kaeya releases his hold on Ajax's face to swipe at his own bangs, flustered. "I mean I was drunk, when I wrote that."




    "And I... What did I say, exactly?"


    Ajax tilts his head, faux innocence tacked on. "That depends. Did you mean it?"


    "Mean what?" Kaeya shakes his head, refusing to meet Ajax's eyes all of a sudden. "I don't remember what I wrote on that thing."


    Ajax steps closer into Kaeya's space, moving to take his hands, which have somehow migrated to his own face, preserving the heat rising up there. The smug smile is back in full force, his eyes half-lidded and glinting with something that has sparks of electricity arcing up the back of Kaeya's neck. His voice is low when he whispers into the space between them, soft as silk. "Did you mean it when you said I'm the only one you want in your bed?"


    Kaeya can feel all of his blood rise to his face. "I..."


    Ajax tilts his head closer, nose brushing against Kaeya's. "Hm..?"


    This is unfair. Despicably unfair. How could someone so.. so infuriatingly blunt fluster Kaeya so much? How can this man undo him so easily, when he's lived his whole life constructing façade after façade, to ensure he'd never lose his cool like this? Just a smile and a touch and he is crumbling to pieces.


    He's dangerous. Kaeya always knew this, despite throwing caution to the wind and jumping headfirst into him anyway. But until now, before he'd known the full extent of the force of Ajax's gaze, exposing the parts of him he'd long thought kept under lock and key, he didn't realize just how much. Kaeya feels like he's holding his breath.


    "You... and if I said yes?"


    Ajax's smile becomes a full grin, and before Kaeya can react, he is swept away by another one of Ajax's soul-shattering kisses.



He isn't even exaggerating when he says "soul-shattering"; Ajax kisses are fire and force in equal measure, overwhelming and all-consuming. Yet at the same time, he holds Kaeya close in a way that is almost reverent, the heat of his lips soothed by the careful but tight embrace he has at Kaeya's waist.


    He reaches under Kaeya's sleep shirt, thumbs gently rubbing circles onto the dips near his waist, sending jolts of warmth straight to Kaeya's stomach and nape. His tongue licks at the roof of Kaeya's mouth, and he is helpless to its invasion, laving his own tongue at Ajax's bottom lip.


    When Ajax pulls him impossibly closer, mouth travelling down to suck a mark beneath Kaeya's jaw, he is reminded that Ajax is very much mostly naked— and due to Kaeya's instruction no less. He feels Ajax's still clothed, fully hard length against the junction of his own hip like a brand to his skin, his warmth seeping out of his trousers, building the desire growing in Kaeya even faster.


    Kaeya's arms have somehow found themselves wrapped around Ajax's shoulders subconsciously, clutching at his skin like a lifeline, like Ajax mouthing at his pulse is enough to drown him. With the way his breath is coming fast, soft mewls pulled out of him with every bite Ajax makes at the skin of his neck, it might just be true.



    This is.. this is unacceptable. Is he really going to let Ajax take the upper hand, here?



    He drags a hand down Ajax's chest, pushing lightly, and Ajax immediately stops his ministrations, withdrawing from Kaeya's space the slightest bit to face him properly, eyes refocusing. Kaeya would flick his forehead for the concerned scrunch formed between his brows if it weren't endearing.


    "Wha.." Ajax says, like he is regaining consciousness, and blinks twice. "Is something wro—"


    Kaeya grips him tight through the fabric of his underwear, and he lets out a keening noise, making Kaeya grin.




    He drags his hand up and down painfully slow, having the sensation of the cloth do most of the work, and he savors the expression Ajax has on his face: lust-addled, surprised, and a bit indignant. His hands on Kaeya's shoulders grip tight, and Kaeya doesn't even mind if they bruise the next day.


    "You come into my house after midnight, wet my floors, and you think you'll lead me to bed too?" Kaeya says sweetly into Ajax's ear as he continues jacking him off, enjoying the way Ajax becomes progressively more red, flush crawling down to cover his freckled chest. "Now I don't think that's fair, is it?" he bites at Ajax's earlobe, making him groan.


    "I just—hnghh, I missed you so bad.."


    "Oh trust me, sweetheart, I missed you too," Kaeya whispers, and punctuates with a wet kiss at Ajax's neck and a pointed downstroke, earning him another gasp. "So, so much. You said something about a letter, didn't you?"


    "Kaeya," Ajax moans into his shoulder, and Kaeya kisses his hair. "Please.."


    "Please what? You're going to have to be specific."


    He hears Ajax take a deep breath, withstanding Kaeya's continued strokes. He draws back, looking Kaeya in the eye, determined, as if bracing himself.


    "Please let me fuck you."


    And isn't that a request.


    The way he says it, all desperate and hoarse and deep at the same time, it almost makes Kaeya drop down to his knees right then and there. He doesn't, of course, but it's definitely an almost.


    He has to have better self control than this. All of this. It's embarrassing, at this point.


    He kisses Ajax instead, open-mouthed and sloppy, biting his lower lip on the draw, drawing another moan from his lover. His grip on Ajax's hardness has gone slack, and he releases him altogether, dragging a hand through his mussed ginger hair instead, scratching his scalp softly.


    When they break for air, Kaeya takes one of Ajax's hands and places it not-so-subtly on the swell of his ass. He smiles, cheeky. Ajax's eyes widen.




    Ajax looks at him like he's seeing Celestia.


    He gropes at Kaeya's ass, hands firm and movements slow as they claw at his skin through his pants, like he's trying to savor the sensation. Kaeya doesn't usually let him indulge, on account of Kaeya taking the lead anyways due to his compulsive need to be in control at all times, so it's a bit novel for himself as well.


    But he should really get on with it soon, because the sensation is a lot stronger than Kaeya realized it would be, sparks of sensation from Ajax's grip sending signals straight to his dick. Who knew ass-kneading was going to be this hot? You learn something new every day.


    "Ajax.." Kaeya whines, and meets his eyes pointedly.


    "Right, yep. On it," Ajax nods, fast, and all of a sudden he grips at Kaeya's thighs, lifting him with ease, as if he had done it without a second thought. Kaeya feels so turned on he's going dizzy.


    He grabs at Ajax's face, and proceeds to suck the soul out of him through his tongue.



    They kiss all the way back to Kaeya's bedroom, Kaeya's ankles locked behind Ajax's waist and hands gripping at his hair, while Ajax has both hands lifting Kaeya from his ass, helping him move against him as they grind at each other. Ajax is getting precum all over Kaeya's silk bottoms, and normally Kaeya would be bothered about it, but at this point he's pretty much fine if Ajax rips his clothes up like parchment. He's leaking a substantial amount through the silk as well, anyways, so he has no room to judge.


    Ajax throws him onto the bed like a rag doll, and follows him down, crawling over him, eyes half-lidded and blue so deep, drowning Kaeya with sensation as he looks him over from top to bottom, licking his lips as he does. They've paused for the moment, just staring at each other as they catch their breath, sharing air through open mouths.


    Ajax looks so insanely wild like this, and gorgeous in a way that Kaeya couldn't explain even if he tried to put pen to paper.


    There's always a point in their pleasure-making where Kaeya feels.. lucky, to have this— have Ajax under him or over him or in any way at all, but there's always been this barrier of "for the meantime", where he's aware that their arrangement isn't something serious, or meant to last.


    But for some reason, he's feeling something different tonight. It feels larger, somehow. As if something is trying to escape his chest, and Kaeya thinks it might be his heart taking flight.


    He blames the calla lilies. And the fact that this ridiculously beautiful boy decided to run straight to his front door from thousands of miles away at the prospect of him feeling lonely. If he keeps this up, Kaeya will start thinking it's fine to be selfish.


    He's dangerous.


    "What is it?" Ajax says, and Kaeya realizes he's more distracted than he thought. He shakes his head.


    "It's nothing. Let's just-"


    "Hey, that didn't look like nothing," Ajax looks concerned now, and for some reason the fact that he is is making Kaeya's blood sing. "We can stop if you-"


    "No! No, I just," he swallows, and looks away. "I was thinking about something."


    "No kidding."


    Kaeya pouts at him. "It was about you."




    Ajax looks stunned for a second. "Like in a good kind of way?"


    "In a good kind of way."


    Ajax smiles, and there's a stronger flush to his cheeks. Cute. "Well that's good. Uh. That's good right?"


    Kaeya decides to bite the bullet. Fuck it. If it's ending now, then it's ending now. "I think I'm in love with you."



    Ajax looks like he's having a heart attack.



    Well. Clearly, it was the wrong thing to say. Kaeya can't help the way his heart starts sinking, knot forming in his stomach.


    "I'm sorry, forget that. I was just in my own head. I didn't mean it, you know me," Kaeya says, laughing, and waves his hand around like he's fanning out bad air. Above him, Ajax still looks like someone hit him upside the head.


    Is he still allowed to call him that? Ajax? Will he have to go back to Childe? Tartaglia?


    He stays silent for a while, and Kaeya frowns. If he's gonna let him down, why won't he do it already? "Ajax."


    Ajax blinks. "Sorry," he says, sounding winded, "Can you... could you say that again?"


    "I was just in my-"


    "No, the other thing. The first thing."


    "I," Kaeya swallows the lump in his throat. "I think I'm in love with you."


    Ajax gasps in a breath. The flush on his skin covers all of him now, from the roots of his hair to what Kaeya can see is below his stomach. Oh.


    "Hoh, woah. Okay. Wow, okay. Archons, I thought I heard that wrong. Whew. Alright, okay," he says, and proceeds to kiss Kaeya to death.



    If he thought Ajax's kisses were overwhelming before, they were nothing compared to him now. It's dizzying, how much the elation flooding Kaeya's senses is turning Ajax's tongue in his mouth like a shot of pure gold, lighting his whole body up like Mondstadt on the last eve of Windblume. He feels like he's floating, high on Ajax and his enthusiasm, and he doesn't want it to end.


    They're rutting almost frantically onto each other now, clothed shafts sliding against each other, equally slick through fabric. Kaeya's thighs are wound at Ajax's waist so tight it might leave slight bruises, and Ajax's hand gripping Kaeya's hip definitely will. It's brutal, it's passionate, and it's hot enough to drive Kaeya insane.


    Ajax breaks off for a few seconds to catch his breath, leaving a string of spittle connecting to Kaeya's bottom lip, which Kaeya licks at greedily. Ajax's pupils are dilated so wide he can barely even see blue anymore. "Just," He says, breathing hard, and Kaeya wants to swallow that too, "Just so you know, I'm the same. In love with you, I mean."


    His heart is soaring.


    He giggles into Ajax's mouth as he pulls him in again, kissing his answering laugh away. They're both smiling so much, it's ridiculous.



    The rest of their clothes come off soon enough, Ajax fumbling at his trousers like they're on fire, Kaeya laughing all the while. Kaeya takes off his own sleeping clothes for him after another bungled attempt with the buttons on Kaeya's shirt, kissing Ajax's dejected face at not being able to strip him himself.


    "I'm sorry, you're just so.." he says, and gestures to Kaeya's now naked form on the bed, hair loose and splayed out on the sheets. Ajax flushes bright red once again. His pale complexion makes him go so red so easily, it's adorable.


    "Just so..?" Kaeya teases, raising an eyebrow at him. He drags a foot over to trace at the skin of Ajax's hip, drawing a line down to where it meets his inner thigh. Ajax grabs a hold of his leg before it can touch anywhere nearer his groin, lifting it to kiss Kaeya's ankle. Kaeya snickers.


    "Beautiful," Ajax says, smiling into his skin.


    Kaeya's smile softens. "Flatterer."


    Ajax hums, tracing his lips down Kaeya's leg. "I'm right. Ask anybody." He leaves a bite underneath his calf. "I'm sleeping with the prettiest person in all of Mondstadt."


    Kaeya moans at the sensation of teeth leaving a trail of marks down into his thighs, slipping a hand into Ajax's hair. "There is a whole fan society that will club you to death for implying I'm prettier than Deaconess Barbara."


    "You think I can't take a few civilians who are very obviously wrong?"


    Kaeya huffs. "Idiot."


    "Idiot who is correct," Ajax says, and emphasizes by licking a strip down Kaeya's inner thigh, hooking his legs over his shoulders.


    Far be it from Kaeya to argue with him then.



    Between the two of them, Kaeya is the more experienced one at sucking cock, Ajax picking it up only just after they'd started seeing each other. But there is something to be said about Ajax's enthusiasm— mostly that its as endearing as it is hot, the way he happily chokes on Kaeya's length like there's nothing else he'd rather be doing, slurping loudly enough that it makes Kaeya's ears heat up. He covers what he can't take into his mouth with his hand, twisting his wrist on the upstroke with every upward bob of his head.


    It's sloppy, and there's probably way too much saliva going on down there, but that only serves to rile Kaeya up more. He's barely aware of the sounds he's making himself, unable to keep himself restrained from vocalizing just how much Ajax is making him feel. Ajax hums around him, and it makes him keen, back arching and eyes screwing shut.


    "You okay there?" Ajax says, and Kaeya looks down to see Ajax grinning smugly, pumping his wet length all the while. Kaeya's body might be shaking from stimulation, but he still finds it in himself to roll his eyes at his lover.


    "P-peachy. Will you be fucking me soon or will I be doing it m-myself?"


    "Hm," Ajax kisses the tip of his cock. "Tempting. But don't tell me you're not enjoying this," he says, punctuating with another stroke, and sucks at his balls. Kaeya gasps, thighs spasming.


    "Y-you're not gonna make me beg f-for it."


    Ajax breathes hot air over him. "Aren't I?"


    Kaeya narrows his eyes. Honestly, this man. "Don't m-make me strangle you with my legs."


    "Your threats just sound like very encouraging promises to me," Ajax says, but relents. Leaving one last kiss at Kaeya's cock, he climbs back up, accepting the biting kiss Kaeya gives him, hands gripping at his bright hair.



    They break for air again, and Ajax lays two fingers onto Kaeya's bottom lip. He pushes in slightly, and Kaeya takes it the rest of the way, wetting them with his tongue before sucking hard. Ajax groans at the sight.


    "God, you're so pretty," Ajax says, staring awed at Kaeya going to town on his fingers like they're a substitute for his dick. He looks up at Ajax through his lashes, and Ajax shivers, licking his own lips. He pulls his fingers out, avidly watching the string of spit stretch out from Kaeya's tongue, and goes down to kiss it right off.


    There's so much heat and desire boiling up between them both, sucking at each others' mouths like they're the air that the other needs to breathe. Kaeya has burned through so many lovers in his lifetime that this should all feel like routine at this point; an orgasm is the natural end goal and purpose to sex, and as much as he and Ajax are lovers— exclusively now, at least he assumes— sex is sex, and as pleasurable as it is and how varied the methods are to it, in the end it more or less feels the same every time.


    But tonight it's as if all the sex in the past pales to the sensation of Ajax's tongue against his, pales to the feel of his finger circling Kaeya's entrance—still wet with saliva— entering with little resistance. Ajax rewrites the memories on his skin from past lovers with the brand of his own melting touch, making it so that every jolt of pleasure exceeds anything he's ever felt before.


    It's as if he's never even known lovemaking like this. It's as if he's done it wrong this whole time.



    Ajax kisses down to Kaeya's chest, paying attention to the pebbled buds there, licking and biting at one while the other is abused by his free hand. Kaeya curses as he pulls at them both, head fuzzy with warmth. Ajax's other hand is busy pumping two fingers into Kaeya's loosening hole, long enough to reach the bundle of nerves inside him just so. Kaeya's hands find themselves clawing at Ajax's back, his ankles hooked at his lover's waist.


    Kaeya becomes increasingly loud the more Ajax abuses his prostate, every hit at his spot punching out a repetitive "ah, ah, ah" from him. Above him, Ajax is panting, watching him fall to pieces with a look of hunger plain on his face. His cock twitches at Kaeya's moans, leaking precum over his dark thighs.


    "S-shit," Kaeya breathes out as Ajax inserts a third finger, and grinds down onto the intrusion like it can't come fast enough. "Sweetheart, you have to fuck me. I d-don't think I'm gonna last like this. I-hngh—," he jerks at a particularly hard hit to his spot, prompting Ajax to stroke it soothingly. "I want— I want to come on your cock."


    "Fuck," Ajax moans, and pulls out his fingers immediately, making Kaeya whine. He fumbles for the bottle of warming oil on the windowsill, and coats his fingers generously before bringing them back to loosen Kaeya properly. Kaeya stops his hand before he can put anything in, and shakes his head almost frantically.


    "Just," Kaeya swallows, "Just your cock. Inside me, now."


    Ajax screws his eyes shut, red all over once again. "You are going to kill me, you know that?"




    "Right, yes," Ajax says, and starts slicking himself up, hissing at the sensation. He positions himself right at Kaeya's entrance, going slowly so as not to hurt him.


    The concern is cute, but Kaeya needs to get dicked down yesterday. The desperation is nearly enough to be suffocating.


    He flips them both over all of a sudden, making Ajax yelp.




    He ignores Ajax's shock in favor of lining himself up with his cock, slippery now with both precum and lubricant, and sheathes it inside himself immediately, sighing at the feeling of finally being filled. "Yes," he breathes out almost absently, thoughts blanked by the sheer euphoria.


    He is only minutely aware of Ajax staring at his own blissed out face, fixated on savoring the stretch of his length inside him, but he's snapped out of his reverie with the abrupt snap of Ajax's hips.


    "Ah! Fuck," Kaeya gasps, as Ajax starting fucking in earnest, hands gripping at the dip of Kaeya's waist. He lets out a string of unintelligible words at each jolt to his prostate, Ajax angling his hips so accurately that Kaeya can barely keep himself from coming. He holds onto Ajax's shoulders like a lifeline as he rides out every desperate thrust as if he's leading the cavalry into battle.


    Ajax himself is red all over, brows drawn and eyes focused onto Kaeya's every minute reaction as he chases his completion inside the warmth of Kaeya's body. The noises he makes are significantly more quiet, grunting and panting heavily into the hollow of Kaeya's throat, and Kaeya lifts his head with both hands so they can share air instead, open mouths touching in an almost-kiss.


    "I'm close," Ajax says, and the way he lifts Kaeya's hips then is a warning. Kaeya retaliates by grinding down onto his cock harder, making him hiss.


    "Come-fuck—come inside me," Kaeya whines, and Ajax's eyes snap shut once again. His grip on Kaeya's waist becomes bruising, and his thrusts pick up in speed. "Please please pleasepleaseplease," Kaeya mutters repeatedly into his ear, not knowing what exactly he's begging for, but wanting it so badly he can barely breathe.


    "I love you, I love you so fucking much," Ajax groans into his mouth, and at that particular thrust, Kaeya screams, spilling all over Ajax's stomach.


    With Ajax still hard and aching and moving relentlessly inside him, he kisses his way to his lover's jaw, just underneath his ear, body still shivering from the aftershocks of his own orgasm. "Come for me," he says, voice hoarse, "mark me up inside." 


    His world turns upside down as he is suddenly flipped once again, face down into the mattress.


    "Aja-AH!" He yelps as he feels Ajax enter him again, still oversensitive. It's just on the side of too much, and absolutely mind-blowing. He moans loudly as Ajax starts thrusting with reckless abandon.


    "Fuck, fuckfuckfuck," Ajax chants repeated as his movements become erratic, and Kaeya's thoughts turn into straight mush as he feels another orgasm build up in the pit of his stomach.


    Ajax reaches down to Kaeya's neglected cock and starts stroking, and Kaeya immediately comes, nearly blacking out. Ajax's hips stutter at the sensation of him clenching at his dick.


    "God you, you're so—" Ajax says, frantically chasing his own release, until he reaches his peak and yells, spilling his heat inside. Kaeya sighs, satisfied.



    They take a few moments to catch their breath, Ajax pulling out and collapsing right beside him. The night is otherwise silent, and Kaeya starts to flush as he realizes how loud they probably were.


    "That was," Ajax starts, and chuckles as he watches Kaeya turn to face him. "That was something."


    Kaeya scoffs. "No kidding," he says, and Ajax laughs harder, making Kaeya feel giddy inside. He starts giggling along with him, until they're both in hysterics.


    Their laughter keeps up until Ajax chokes on his own saliva, prompting Kaeya to pat him on the chest, inspiring another round of laughter from Kaeya. It eventually winds down until they're back to tired silence, leaning against each other and staring at the ceiling.


    There's a cloud hanging over them now with the conclusion of the night, and Kaeya remembers there's an unanswered question that needs answering. After all the things they've said tonight, it isn't something they'll be able to avoid anymore— not if they want to see each other again, after this.



    Kaeya finds his chest aching at the thought of losing this at all.



    "Hey," Ajax says softly, rubbing his forefinger inbetween Kaeya's eyebrows, and he realizes he's been scrunching them.


    "Hey," Kaeya says back, and takes Ajax's hand, kissing the tips of his fingers. "So."




    "Is this like," Kaeya swallows, for once at a loss for words, "What. What is this."


    Ajax props his head up with his other arm, leaning on the hand not clutched in Kaeya's own. "You mean us?"


    "Yeah, yes. Us." He finds that the word itself is like sparks from the crackle of a hearth in his stomach.


    "Well, I'm not one to beat around the bush," Ajax says, and moves his hand from Kaeya's hold to brush a lock of blue hair behind his ear. "I don't know how many times I've said 'I love you' tonight already, but I think you get the point. And," he grins, smug, "May I remind you that you said the L word first, so you have no room to be questioning anything."


    Kaeya looks at him flatly. "The L word. Really? Are you 5?"


    "You're deflecting."


    "I'm not doing anything," Kaeya scoffs. Ajax rolls his eyes, and proceeds to smother Kaeya in a hug.


    "Oof," Kaeya says, winded.


    Ajax lifts himself by the arms, now directly above him once again. "We're lovers."


    "That's a given."


    "No, I mean," Ajax sighs, and runs a hand through his hair. "I haven't been sleeping with anyone but you."




    "And you haven't been sleeping with anyone besides me recently, right?"


    "Obviously. I sent you a letter completely drunk practically saying I'd rather fuck myself to the thought of you than find some random cock to sit on, so yes it's been only you for a while."


    Ajax grins wide. "So you do remember what was on that letter."


    Kaeya groans, and pushes him off to the side, Ajax laughing at him all the while.


    "Yes. Okay. Are you happy?"


    "Yes," Ajax says. Kaeya turns to look him in the eye, and sees a soft smile aimed at him. Kaeya's heart skips a beat.


    "I... me too," Kaeya says quietly. Ajax's smile grows wider, flush back in his cheeks.


    "So, Lovers," Ajax states firmly, staring right into Kaeya's eyes.




    "Exclusive lovers."


    "Exclusive lovers," Kaeya parrots, nodding.


    "Yes!" Ajax exclaims, and drops another surprise hug onto him. "Archons, I can't wait to bring you home. You're gonna love it, I promise. I know Tonia's going to love you at first sight. Teucer's easy to charm, so we can just—"


    Kaeya puts a hand on Ajax's chest, head spinning. "Teucer?"


    "My brother."


    "You meant, like bring me home? To Snezhnaya?"


    Ajax pauses. "Yes," he says carefully, "is that.. not something you'd want?"


    "I do!" Kaeya says immediately, shocking them both wide-eyed. "I mean, that would. I'd love that," he finishes, all the blood in his body rushing to his face. Sweet celestia, it's like all those years of emotional repression are down the drain tonight. He covers his face in both hands, ignoring Ajax's answering giggles.


    Ajax pulls at Kaeya's hands, dropping a kiss onto his forehead. "I love you," he says, and Kaeya screws his eyes shut.


     "I love you," Ajax says again, kissing him chastely on the lips. He peppers more over his eyelids and cheeks, until Kaeya covers his face with a hand, giggling at him to stop.


    "You're so ridiculous," Kaeya laughs, warmth emanating from his every pore. The way Ajax makes him feel is enough to have him flying without a glider, at heights Barbatos couldn't even dare to tread. He's fallen off the deep end for sure—he's never even been this sappy in his own head before.


    "Ridiculously in love with you," Ajax says, muffled through the hand, and Kaeya can feel him grinning underneath. He drops another chaste kiss at Kaeya's palm before taking it into one of his own hands, lacing their fingers together. They're close enough that Kaeya could count this freckles on his face, stare at them like they'll spell out the meaning of the pleasant swooping in his stomach at Ajax's earnest, clumsy declarations of infatuation and devotion.


    He's not a fool. He knows that their reciprocated affections mean nothing in the grand scheme of things; Kaeya is still a Knight of Favonius, and Ajax is still a Harbinger, and both of them have their roles to play in the conflict between Teyvat, Celestia and the Abyss. But like this, with Ajax's boyish smile taking root in the concrete of the slowly weathering walls surrounding his heart, he wonders for the first time if it's alright to be this incandescently happy, even just for a little while.


    God, he wants to cry. That's how pathetic he is, now. 25 years old and already losing his touch; it's too bad the Ordo can't take back his position for something like emotional vulnerability. And he'll die before little miss Eula Lawrence takes his crown as most unflappable Ordo Captain.


    Stupid Ajax and his stupid, beautiful face, and his stupid, idiotic smile. He's so infatuated it makes him sick.


    He cozies up against Ajax's chest, leaning against his heart. "I love you too," he whispers against his skin, and when Ajax combs a gentle hand through his hair, he knows he's heard.






    He wakes up to frantic knocking at his front door, again.


    Honestly, he's tempted to ignore it and nuzzle back into Ajax's warmth. With the way he's been working his ass off the past few weeks, he's more than earned it. He could even have Jean approve of it—he hasn't taken a proper day off since last year.


    Besides, he's barely in any shape for it. His whole body is sore, and though its of a good kind, he's still more than reluctant to move any part of himself right now, much less anything pertaining to his lower torso and beyond. The heat of the sun at his back is telling him it's late enough in the morning for a normal person to be up and about, but then again, nobody in Mondstadt was fucked stupid at 2 in the morning like him. Or so he assumes.


    He groans as the knocking grows louder, hiding his face into Ajax's neck, burrowing further into the heavy blanket wrapped around them both. Ajax has his arms around him, one arm underneath his head, and pulls him closer at his whining.


    "Good morning," Ajax says into his hair. Kaeya grunts in response. Ajax laughs.


    "Sir Kaeya!" a muffled voice comes from the other side of the door. "Sir Kaeya, please! This is an urgent matter!"


    "Sounds like you need to get that," Ajax whispers giddily into the space between them.


    Kaeya pops his head out properly from under the sheets, face incredibly sour. Ajax laughs harder.


    "I should be making you get that," Kaeya grumbles, eyes squinted, from the sun and sleep and pure unfettered annoyance.


    Ajax grins. "Well, you know I-"


    "SIR KAEYA!"


    "COMING," Kaeya yells, getting up abruptly and making Ajax wince.


    He wraps himself up in the blanket, pulling it from under Ajax's ass, and stomps his way to the front door. He's done this before, on the rare occasions where he's too hungover and overworked to be civil to his answering junior, and as much as he knows better than to act this way, he's well aware of how much he deserves a single late morning, at least.


    He opens the door to, as he'd suspected, a hysterical Huffman. He sighs.


    "What's the matter now, Huffman," he says flatly, and tries not to tune out his answering panicked ramble.


    "Well, you see, sir, there's been a situation with the waypoints connected to here from Fontaine, and the acting Grandmaster has asked me to call for you because you've been on patrol around that area, and have eyes and ears on it besides, and she also requested for me to tell you that she apologizes as—"


    He watches as Huffman grows considerably more pale, swallowing his words all of a sudden. He almost asks him why he looks like he's seen a ghost, before he feels a pair of arms hug him from behind.


    "Hello, Knight of Favonius," Ajax says brightly from over Kaeya's shoulder. He sees Huffman's eyes shift rapidly from Ajax's naked form to Kaeya's neck, which he belatedly realizes is exposed enough to show marks from last night.






    "Sir," Huffman bows, albeit a bit shaky, and clears his throat. "Sir Tartaglia, it's a surprise to see you here, sir."


    "It's nothing, really! I just dropped by to see my lover here, Sir Kaeya," he says, and punctuates with a kiss to Kaeya's cheek. Despite himself, Kaeya flushes. "Now, what is it that's happened?"


    "Well, um," Huffman coughs, and scratches the back of his head. "There are.. there are Fontainean delegates at Headquarters inquiring about a runaway vision-using vagrant who had knocked out two waypoint guards before teleporting into Mondstadt. I was sent here to request Sir Kaeya's presence for any possible information about them, but..."


    From behind him, Ajax grew considerably quiet the more Huffman had explained the situation, and when Kaeya leans back to hear him holding his breath, he realizes quickly what's going on.


    Oh for the love of—


    "Ajax," Kaeya says softly. "Do you have something to say?"


    Ajax laughs, obviously strained. "I think I should come with you, then!"


    Huffman looks like he's been put through the wringer. He's practically soaked in sweat, and it's not even a warm day. "Please come quickly, sirs. And," he looks at them both, apprehensive. "Congratulations? For your.. relationship?"


    Kaeya smiles. "If anyone hears anything about this, I'll freeze off your tongue in front of assembly."


    Huffman bows quickly, and leaves faster than he's ever seen him before. He'd be tempted to laugh at the sight, if not for the fact that he's pissed off. He sighs, closing the door, and turns to face his lover who is now looking abashedly at the floor.


    "A vision using vagrant knocking out two waypoint guards. What do you have to say for yourself."


    Ajax holds his hands up in a show of surrender. "In my defense, I missed you, I was horny, and they were halfway into sleep city anyway."


    Kaeya rubs at his temples, feeling a hangover coming on despite not drinking a sip of alcohol. "I hope that's not what you're planning to tell the people from Fontaine when we get there. Why did you do that!"


    "There isn't any faster way! And," Ajax looks away, and mutters "you were being open about your feelings, for once."


    Kaeya stares.


    That's not supposed to work on him. Nothing that simple has ever affected him before.


    He's decided that being in love is the worst.


    He closes his eyes, and sighs deeply. "We are going to work on your alibi, because as much as I love you, I am not going to reveal our relationship to the whole of Mondstadt this way."



      Ajax pulls him into another hug, laughing as he kisses his hair, and Kaeya tells himself he's still mad at the goofball, even when he knows he isn't.