Minho has had his fair share of Lazy Days.
Lazy Days consisted of: lying on his couch with his three cats as he ate his third slice of pizza, some mindless reality show blasting in his living room as he oh-so-helpfully rolled his eyes at the unlucky souls having their day to day life aired out to the public for views.
Lazy Days were a biweekly occurrence that happened on whatever day he felt like it, sometimes weekly if work was shitty enough. It was his time to be the most unlikeable version of himself, one that most would find unattractive and unappealing in any other scenario, and he honestly didn’t give a single fuck about it. His cats didn’t seem to care, so why would he care if someone else cared about the double chin he created when he stuffed his face with food? Or about the uncombed hair that messily sat atop his head? Or the pajamas he hadn’t changed out of since morning?
Well, he could think of one person he would care about.
Correction: two or three.
There was a reason he did these Lazy Days by himself, because his long time friends would never see him as a collected adult with radiant skin and magnificent hair ever again if they saw how he behaved during his lazy days.
His friends were the definition of perfect, and Minho knew he couldn’t compare to them. If Minho had magnificent hair then Jisung was a godsend with hair fluffier than a cloud, so soft Minho could hardly believe he had actually felt it. If Minho had radiant skin, then Felix had sun kissed freckles that adorned his cheekbones in flawless constellations. If Minho was a collected adult, then Seungmin was the epitome of preparation and professionalism that Minho could never achieve.
No matter how perfect Minho tried to present himself, his three closest friends were more perfect. Which was precisely why they worked so well together without him.
Minho had met them before they started dating each other, when it was only Jisung and Felix seeing each other at the time. It was just casual, and Jisung had been sure to relay that to Minho after their third encounter. They were in a relatively popular cafe that Minho frequented, and Jisung had found him for the third Saturday in a row to strike up conversation. Minho remembered him being charming, a little hyper, and having a large library of corny jokes.
Felix wasn’t any better, but Minho meant that in the best way possible. He was the purest angel, one that curled himself around Jisung every time they met up with Minho at the cafe. He loved playing with Minho’s fingers across the table and Jisung didn’t mind it one bit. He would constantly twist and bend Minho digits and the older would laugh as Felix decided he was done and wanted to hand feed Minho french fries. Jisung would join, and then it would turn into fries being thrown over the booth.
It was when they met Seungmin that things got serious for Jisung and Felix.
Seungmin wasn’t as much of a social butterfly as the other three, and according to Felix he had met him at the restaurant Felix worked at. Minho had nodded along quietly as Felix went on about Seungmin’s polite praise and subtle flirting, and the hefty tip with a phone number neatly written out on the receipt.
“So… you like him?” Minho had asked with carefully worded curiosity as he slowly sipped at his iced coffee. The music had shifted to something a bit more relaxed, and the three boys had taken a booth after entering the same cafe they always had their meetups at.
“Well, kinda?” Felix shrugged as he bit into a french fry, “He doesn’t know about Sungie and the two haven’t met yet. Not to mention I don’t actually know him.”
“You should still text him!” Jisung nudged his kind-of-boyfriend’s side with a chuckle, “Just be honest and let him know what’s up. Obviously he’s interested and if you like him then I bet I’ll like him too.”
Minho froze, his eyes darting from both of his friends as he tried to piece things together in his head, “I thought… aren’t you two like, together?”
“Well, sorta?” Felix worded it like a question, facing Jisung as if he was unsure himself, “We decided we weren’t going to be exclusive just yet.”
“Yup!” Jisung nodded his head rather aggressively, “We’re free to see who we please as long as we both consent to it. Which is why you ,” Jisung pulled Felix into his side with one arm, “Should text him! Ask him out to coffee or something and then see if he’s cool with meeting me!”
That was how Minho was introduced to the world that was polyamory.
That one visit to the cafe where he, Jisung, and Felix had made a habit to hang out together was what spurred on the slightly drunken night of realization and understanding that would proceed to fuck up Minho’s life in both the best and worst way possible.
It’s not that he was unsupportive, in fact it was the exact opposite. He was overly supportive. He was over the moon excited for them and what their relationship would become. He was so happy they were finding love and was hoping he could meet Seungmin if everything worked out between them.
He just never expected to catch feelings along the way.
The first time Minho met Seungmin was during a trip to the mall where all four of them decided to spend the day together. They met up in the food court with the intention of shopping for various different items. Minho was on a mission to buy his friend Hyunjin a birthday present even if he still had a month, and Seungmin apparently was also searching for a birthday present for his friend Jeongin. Felix and Jisung eagerly tagged along, deciding to buy each other a gift to keep with the theme.
Minho learned about jealousy, and how it was a terrible feeling he despised.
Seungmin was nice, in his behavior and his looks because damn he looked good in a white button up. He was chivalrous, insisting on pulling out chairs for everyone and carrying bags as they went from store to store. Minho had engaged him in conversation multiple times, learning of his university courses that he hated and the one friend he had that was stuck to him like glue.
He was a lot like Minho, kind of quiet and a little feisty. He cracked jokes and made playful jabs at the three that had everyone red with laughter. He fit in so well that Minho almost forgot that Seungmin was technically dating Felix, until Felix placed a petite kiss on the boy's cheek before skipping off towards another store with Jisung’s hand in his own.
That little detail had nearly slipped his mind, the one where Felix and Jisung had an open relationship and Seungmin had openly flirted with Felix a few months ago.
“So, how’s it going with Felix?” Minho asked casually as the two trailed behind the two bouncy boys passing the entrance.
“Great, actually,” Seungmin grinned as he tightened his hold on the bags he had around his shoulder, “He’s amazing…”
“...But?” Minho noticed the slight hesitance, and he felt a sudden dread in his chest. Seungmin seemed so kind and it was obvious Felix and Jisung really liked him. Minho could only hope whatever was troubling the boy could be easily fixed.
“It’s just…” Seungmin sighed, “I really like Felix, so so much. But… I also kind of like Jisung? I know this started out as an open relationship thing with me and Lix but I might talk to them again about trying it with all three of us.”
“You should go for it,” Minho answered honestly, “Honesty is key in your relationship. Even if they say no, you know they’ll appreciate your honesty.”
Seungmin did talk to them, that night apparently.
Minho had fallen asleep as soon as he arrived home from their shopping adventure and didn’t wake up until nearly six in the afternoon. He pushed himself up from his couch with small indents on his cheek from where the fabric melded into his skin. He flailed around for his phone in his half awake state and pulled the too bright screen up to his face in search of the time, but he was met with a wall of texts.
Lixie: MINHO YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT JUST HAPPENED
Sungie: MINHOOOOO GUESS WHO HAS TWO FUCKING BOYFRIENDS
Unknown Number: Hey, Lix and Sung gave me your number. This is Seungmin.
Unknown Number: I wanted to thank you for talking to me today and for letting me meet you.
Unknown Number: You’re an amazing friend for them, and I’m so glad I have the opportunity to get to know you.
Unknown Number: I hope we can talk more in the future? And become better friends? Lix and Sung talk about you alot. You seem really nice.
Unknown Number: Anyways, thanks for giving me courage today. I hope one day I can repay the favor.
As much as Minho wanted to be happy for his friends, much like he was months ago when he first found out about their open relationship, he could only feel sinking dread. His smile dropped into a quivering lip, and regret began fogging his thoughts. At first he didn’t know why he felt so suddenly depressed over something that should have made him happy. He had been cheering on his friends for so long, even encouraged them in their relationship. He thought it was great that his friends found love no matter how or when.
But apparently there was a larger part of him that didn’t like it, a selfish part that wanted a piece of what they had.
At first he thought he could possibly have hope, that he could try doing what Seungmin had and just put himself out there. After all, Felix and Jisung had expressed that they had an open relationship based on consent and communication. If Minho asked, the most they would do was turn him down. He remembered his own words to Seungmin and attempted following his own advice.
But fear took root, and each time Minho tried to approach the topic he would choke up. He would stare into Felix’s starry eyes and lose his train of thought. He would have his mind drowned out by Jisung’s laugh and decide to let the moment drag on as long as possible. He would talk to Seungmin late at night about his family and the new cat they got and then he would ask about Minho’s cats and Minho would be so excited-
And it never happened.
He never gathered the courage to ask about them as four, about if they could ever work out.
About four months into their new three person relationship, Felix and Jisung caught the eye of a good looking guy at the cafe. He was handsome, Minho would give him that, but he was nothing when Felix and Jisung already had Seungmin to themselves. The man was flirtatious, his hands filled with two iced teas as he tried to pass one off to Jisung, “Hey, you look like a fruity kind of guy. How about a mango tea? It’s on me.”
“Oh, I’m okay,” Jisung declined instantly with a small smile, “Thank you, though.”
“No problem,” The man shrugged before turning to Minho, “What about you hot stuff? Want a drink?”
“Uh,” Minho blinked, turning from Jisung to the other man with bewilderment, “No… I’m okay.”
“Suit yourself,” The man turned one more time, facing Felix with a cheeky grin, “I’m guessing that’s a no from you too then?”
“You got it!” Felix cheered, earning a chuckle from Jisung.
But Minho was too surprised to laugh. The two boys hardly gave the man a glance, not even sparing him a second glance like they would have done had it been any other day. It was strange and out of character for them, but Minho let it slide.
Until it happened two more times.
Jisung and Felix continued to turn down guys and girls alike, both with polite manners. They didn’t point attention to it, so Minho avoided asking, even if he was really fucking confused. Each time they hung out, he noticed the lack of comments about attractive people, the increase in attention they gave each other and Minho. During one of their larger group outings, this time to a movie theater, Seungmin told Minho he was planning on introducing Felix and Jisung to his parents. That was when things started to click for Minho.
They were exclusive now.
Exclusive meant there was no room for Minho.
He forced himself to ignore the awful feeling that began taking residence in his heart again. It was ever present every time he texted Seungmin pictures of his cats, every time he decided to get lunch with Felix and Jisung, every time he heard about their date nights and every time they went out on a group outing. He would feel the ugly jealous leach that hadn’t left, sucking out the joy he should be feeling and replacing it with doubt and insecurity.
He wasn’t anything compared to them, and he began to realize he could never be good enough for any of them. He couldn’t compete with Jisung’s charm, Felix’s kindness, or Seungmin’s thoughtfulness. All three of them were gorgeous, and Minho was sitting on his couch half way through his fourth pizza slice. They were happy, having been together for almost a year now and Minho had begun spending more and more time alone.
They were still his best friends, and Minho still met up at the cafe with Felix and Jisung when he could. But the amount of times he went out dwindled down from every weekend to every other weekend. It became sporadic and inconsistent, and Minho felt terrible for it, but every time he showed up to their meets up he felt a piece of his heart burn to ash.
Every time Seungmin gave a reassuring squeeze to Minho’s shoulders he had to force a smile instead of leaning into the touch.
Every time Jisung slotted his hand into Minho’s he had to keep himself from pulling the boy into his chest.
Every time Felix nuzzled his cheek, he had to stop himself from turning his face and letting their lips graze each other.
Every time they acted lovey dovey to each other he had to try to convince himself it doesn’t matter when in reality it felt like his world was rejecting him.
So he drifted away slightly, just so he could ease the pain in his heart instead of letting the gaping hole grow. He attended less group hangouts and spent more time at the dance studio with Hyunjin. He started taking on extra hours at work and spent long nights bent over his desk in his small cubicle. He bought comfort food and got himself invested in a stupid tv show while his friends continued to blossom their beautiful relationship.
And he pretended he wasn’t hurting as much, even though it was a lie.
It was Saturday, and he was supposed to meet up with Felix and Jisung like he used to but he had cancelled at the last minute – just like he did the week before, making excuses. He slumped in his couch looking nothing like the man he wanted them to see him as while he tried to pay attention to the idiotic couple on his show. It was growing later, almost ten at night, but even though he had tomorrow off, Minho found himself contemplating just heading to bed anyway.
But then his phone dinged, and Seungmin’s name popped up on his screen.
Minnie: Hey Minho, I know you told Lix and Sungie that you were busy today but I really need your help right now.
Minnie: Can you please call me?
Minho was seriously trying to keep his distance, but despite his heart burning, he swiped open the device. He would always make time for them when they needed him. Of course he would. He flung himself up from his couch with his phone pushed up to his ear.
“Hello?” Seungmin’s voice sounded muffled and jarred through the speakers as Minho gathered the scattered food from his living room. Loud, unintelligible music accompanied Seungmin’s greeting.
“Hey,” Minho responded slowly as he tried to , “What’s going on? Are you okay?”
“That depends on your definition of ‘okay’,” Seungmin huffed into the receiver, barely loud enough to overpower the heavy music “Lix, please, I need my foot on the floor.”
“Is Felix with you?” Minho didn’t bother to properly put away the pizza and other assorted snacks he had out, choosing instead to lay them on his kitchen counter as he dashed towards his bedroom, “Where are you? What’s going on?”
“Yeah he’s here, we’re at some club down the street from the apartment,” Seungmin grunted as Minho hastily pulled out a pair of sweatpants and a clean shirt from his closet, “I have no idea where Jisung is, Felix keeps being too vague and too attached to my leg at the moment.”
Minho briefly let his scattered brain wonder why the hell his three best friends were at a club, but quickly discarded the worried questions he had. He could always interrogate them for answers later, but with Jisung missing he didn’t want to waste time.
There was some shuffling on the other end followed by a familiar deep voice, “Is that Minho?! Hi Minho~”
“Hey Lixie,” Minho couldn’t help but smile at the pure excitement he could hear in the younger’s voice, “Are you doing okay?”
“No~,” Felix whined with a slight slur, “I’m so lonely~”
“But you have Minnie right next to you,” Minho could tell Felix was far gone, which only made him worry more about Jisung who they had yet to locate.
“Hm, I do love Minnie,” Felix gradually sounded more distant, and Minho could only assume he drifted from the cellphone back to Seungmin again.
“Hey, Minho?” Seungmin took hold of the phone again just as Minho finished tying his shoes, “They’re really drunk.”
“I can gather that,” Minho’s chuckle came out a bit more bitter than intended, “It’s not a good idea to let Jisung stay missing for too long. I’m gonna head over there and help you find him.”
“Thank you,” Seungmin let out a breath of relief, “I honestly have no clue what to do. I don’t think I’ve ever seen them so drunk. I thought they were just going to the bar and then they were sending me worrying texts from a nightclub…”
“And you went to check on them, like a good boyfriend,” Unlike Minho, who should have been there to begin with instead of moping around on his couch, “It’s okay, I’ll be there in about ten minutes, just try to make Felix drink water until I get there, and if you can find Jisung that’s a bonus.”
“Minho is coming?!” Minho could hear Felix’s gasp grow louder as he catapulted to the phone once more, “Minho, I miss you!”
“I miss you too, Felix,” Minho hummed into the smartphone pressed up against his cheek, “Be good for Seungminnie until I get there, okay?”
“Sit back Lix, you’re about to fall on your face.”
“Seungmin, I’m heading out now,” Minho said as he grabbed his keys from his bedside table and grabbed his sweatshirt, “I’ll call you when I get there.”
The club was packed, with younger college aged adults filtering in and out of the brightly lit building. Each person reeked of alcohol, some more than others, as they staggered out of the door with body glitter rubbing off on the shoulders of their friends who carried them towards parked cars. A few people eyed Minho curiously as he locked his car and headed towards the commotion. He knew he looked nothing like the image most portrayed when choosing to go late night clubbing. He was covering far too much skin and he was bare faced as could be, but he didn’t quite care at the moment.
The line to get in was rather short, and Minho made it up to the bouncer in only a few minutes. He had been prepared, already having his I.D. in his hands.
“You’re good,” He gestured for Minho to enter, and he wasted no time rushing into the mess of sweaty bodies.
The club was filled to the brim with people. The music was so loud it was pounding into his skull, the scent of alcohol lingered in the air, and he got a whiff of body odor that had him near gagging. He was only there for a few minutes, and he already wanted to get the hell out.
The building wasn’t huge, but it also wasn’t very small either. He had no idea where to find Seungmin and Felix, and he wasn’t sure where to start looking. Scanning the crowd of people was a difficult task that proved to be pointless because he couldn’t properly see anyone , not to mention his best friends.
So Minho pulled out his phone to text Seungmin.
I’m here, where are you?
Minnie: By the bar, corner seat
Minnie: I’m trying to make Felix drink some water
Minho wasted no time hurrying over to the packed bar, and he was relieved to see Seungmin sitting on a stool with Felix on his lap. The smaller boy was taking small sips from the water cup Seungmin was holding to his lips, but it was clear Felix wasn’t paying any attention to it.
Especially when his eyes landed on Minho.
“Minho!” Felix cheered as he launched himself from Seungmin’s lap.
Seungmin, in an attempt to prevent Felix from tripping onto his face, dropped the cup of water over himself while Felix happily latched onto Minho’s body. Minho was lucky enough to process that Felix was quite literally jumping onto him that he caught him just in time. The boy’s legs wrapped around his waist with Minho’s forearms holding him from the bottom, and his arms circled around Minho’s neck as Felix pulled his head to his chest.
“I missed you!” Felix exclaimed, right next to Minho’s ear, loud enough that he could feel the vibrations of Felix’s voice over the pounding bass reverberating through the floor.
“I missed you too, Lixie,” Minho rocked their bodies back and forth as he let Felix snuggle him (read: borderline suffocate him) to his heart's content.
When Felix finally pulled back to look at Minho eye to eye, the older boy could see just how drunk his friend was. Felix’s eyes were bloodshot and his hair was messily tangled atop his head. His makeup was smudged with black spots rubbed into the creases of his eyelids, and somehow some eyeliner had transferred onto Felix’s neck during the night. But the goofy smile he was wearing seemed to care very little about how disheveled he looked.
“Oh Lix,” Minho sadly chuckled at his friend’s state, “What happened to you?”
Felix didn’t grant him an explanation, and when he heard Minho laugh, he started laughing too. So instead, he had an armful of giggly Lee Felix who was too drunk out of his mind to properly speak to him.
“Thanks for coming,” Minho turned in Seungmin’s direction as he approached the two.
“Of course,” Minho bounced Felix in his arms, earning another bout of giggles from the younger, “I’d always come if you needed me.”
“I appreciate it,” Seungmin smiled at him, and Minho felt the familiar lurch in his chest.
Kim Seungmin was a good looking man, he always had been. Even now, dressed in simple jeans and a long sleeved casual shirt, he looked ethereal. He had no business being so attractive. With his perfect teeth, fluffy hair, and pretty eyes…
And the very obvious wet spot on his shirt.
“Shit, your soaked,” Minho noted as Felix’s hands made their way into his hair.
When the drunken boy began playing with the strands, Minho chose to let him without interference. If it kept him happy and content in his arms, he would gladly take a head massage from one of his favorite people.
Seungmin sighed, “I’ll just change when we get home.”
“Are you kidding?! It’s too cold outside!” Minho scolded back, “I’m not letting you walk out of here in a soaking wet shirt. Just take my sweatshirt.”
Seungmin jolted in response, eyes wide and blinking back at him in surprise. But within seconds he was grinning back at Minho with appreciation, “Won’t you be cold then?”
“I’m not the one with a wet shirt. Besides, I have long sleeves on underneath.”
He didn’t have long sleeves on underneath, but Seungmin didn’t need to know that just yet.
“If you’re sure,” Seungmin mumbled back with his smile having remained glued to his face.
“I am,” Minho reassured before directing his attention back to the boy in his arms who was still entertained by his hair, “Hey Lixie, I’m gonna put you down really quick to give Minnie my sweatshirt. Then we need to find Sungie, okay?”
“No!” Felix suddenly clung to Minho’s body once more, constricting his limbs around his body so much Minho was concerned he may be cutting off his blood circulation.
“Felix-” Minho could hear Seungmin’s muffled voice from behind Felix’s chest he was pressed against. And even though he couldn’t see through the boy’s body, he could assume Seungmin had tried to physically intervene by the jerk Felix had made in his arms.
“No!” He declined again.
Felix’s nails were digging into Minho’s scalp, holding on for dear life. His body was quivering slightly, and Minho could hear the sadness in his voice. Felix didn’t want Minho to let him go, not for anything, and he felt terrible that Felix’s desire to stay attached to him made him feel so happy, so wanted .
“How about this,” Minho attempted to speak against Felix’s chest, and it’s very possible Felix was the only one to actually hear him, but that would do, “You stay right here in my arms, and you help take off my sweatshirt for me and give it to Minnie?”
A moment passed with Felix thinking it over, Seungmin awkwardly standing a foot away from them, before Felix eventually accepted Minho’s suggestion. He slowly pulled back and detached his hand from Minho’s head. Though when the nails finally dislodged from his scalp, Minho couldn’t help but wince. Felix definitely noticed if his whine was anything to go by.
Then the boy was leaning down, kissing the top of Minho's head in apology, and smoothing out the hair gently.
Minho could barely breathe. Felix had moved on and was beginning to tug at the bottom of the sweatshirt, but Minho was still stuck on the phantom feeling of lips against his skin.
Felix had kissed him.
It had been small, just one, and it was on the top of his head of all places, but it was a kiss.
He kissed him.
“Hyung,” Felix complained at the lack of reaction, jumping Minho back into the present.
“Sorry,” Minho breathed before helping Felix shimmy the sweatshirt over his hips and from under Felix’s legs.
They successfully got the body of the fabric up to his chest, then they struggled a bit to get it over his head. The hard part was getting his arms out of the holes without dropping Felix. Obviously, the boy didn’t want to get put down. And even though Minho could try to release him for a second, he really didn’t want to disappoint him.
So Minho did the only thing he could think of. He carried them both over to the wall closest to them, earning a few curious glances as they passed a few couples, and pinned Felix with his own body. The younger grunted at the force of his back hitting the wall, but didn’t react much otherwise. Minho used his knee to balance Felix so he could remove his arms and allowed Felix to pull the sweatshirt completely off of him.
With the sweatshirt finally off, Minho got back to carrying the smaller boy. He instructed Felix to hand it over to a wide eyed Seungmin.
If Minho had thought about it just a bit longer, he might have thought Seungmin enjoyed what he saw.
“You said you had long sleeves,” Seungmin reluctantly took the sweatshirt from Felix’s hands, “Are you sure you don’t want it?”
“You need it more than I do.”
“No I don’t-”
“Seungmin,” Minho interrupted softly, “Please take it.”
The other froze. They both stared at each other for a moment, Seungmin with contemplation and Minho with determination, until Minho gestured towards the sweatshirt still in Seungmin’s hands. Then with a sigh, Seungmin eventually conceded.
“Fine, I’ll go change in the bathroom,” He announced, “I’ll be right back, keep an eye on him.”
Seungmin pointed at Felix who had returned to quietly playing with Minho’s hair.
“Will do,” Minho nodded in response, “Try to search for Jisung while you’re out there. I don’t like that he’s still missing.”
“Me neither,” Seungmin anxiously groaned, “I’m just gonna go look for him and find you again when I have him.”
Then Seungmin was leaving, nearly sprinting down towards the bathrooms to change his shirt as quickly as possible. Minho watched him go. His eyes trailed over Seungmin’s figure, a part of him was sad he wouldn’t get to see Seungmin shed his shirt and put on Minho’s own clothing, but he quickly dumped that thought.
He didn’t need his mind wandering down rabbit holes that got him nowhere but depressed.
Instead he directed his attention back to Felix, who was adorably pouting as he continued to mess with Minho’s hair. He put Felix down on an empty barstool, which allowed Felix to still play with his hair and for Minho to stand between his legs and relax his arms.
“Making a hair heart.”
“Aww I wish I could see.”
“I’ll do it to Sungie later and show you!”
“I’d love that,” Minho whispered back.
They both stayed in place, basking in each other’s company. Felix was completely entertained by the head of hair and Minho was enjoying the feeling of fingers playing in his hair. He closed his eyes as he zoned in on the feeling of Felix, in his arms, against his body, pressing into his skin. He was living in the moment while he had it, because this wasn’t an opportunity he usually had.
It wasn’t often he got to give Seungmin his clothes, and it wasn’t often he could hold Felix so close.
“You’re so pretty, Minho.”
Felix’s words were mumbled, barely audible over the loud music and slurred with the influence of alcohol. But Minho still heard the confession, loud enough for the words to be ringing in his ears. Felix didn’t stop his fingers, and when Minho opened his eyes he was met with Felix’s red tinged eyes staring into his. The breath was sucked out of his lungs, and he stupidly gaped at the boy in his arms.
Would it be wrong if, just for one second, he let himself indulge in the moment?
Felix was clinging to him, kissing his head with soft lips and playing with his hair. He was whispering words like “You’re so pretty” and acting like it was as simple as saying “ Good morning” . He was pouting when Minho tried to put him down and he was jumping into his arms like he’d gone weeks without seeing him. (Which he had.)
He was being so amazing, and all Minho wanted to do was reciprocate everything.
He wanted to say Felix was pretty too, but not just pretty. He wanted to say he was so gorgeous he belonged in a painting. He wanted to cradle his hand behind his head, tucking him into his shoulder as he held him close. He wanted to whisper words that were more intimate, like “You’re perfect” and “I love you” . He wanted to shower Felix in affection.
But Felix was drunk , and Minho was sober.
He couldn’t overstep. Felix was still in a relationship with two equally amazing people. He was already going too far by letting Felix talk to him like this. He shouldn’t let his mind wander, dreaming up fake scenarios that could never happen, because come tomorrow all of this conversation would be a hazy dream that Felix would have forgotten.
But Felix was still staring at him, looking more and more like he was dangerously close to crying the longer Minho took to respond to him. And that was the last thing he wanted to happen.
So he told the truth.
“ You’re pretty, Lixie.”
Then Felix was beaming , and Minho knew he made the right choice.
Minho’s head shot to the left where he saw Seungmin, now wearing the sweatshirt he had been given, weaving between the crowd with a teary eyed Jisung on his back.
“Jisung?” Minho mumbled, more to himself than anything else.
The other boy looked rough .
Much like Felix, he was a disaster. Hair flying everywhere, makeup smudged significantly more so with lines of mascara and eyeliner running down his cheeks, and a red rubbed nose sniffling every few seconds. He was clutched at the sweatshirt Seungmin was wearing with his head tucked into the crook of Seungmin’s neck, no doubt getting tears and snot all over the fabric.
Minho found he didn’t care.
As they finally joined Felix and Minho, Minho could hear the sounds of Jisung’s poorly concealed sobs more clearly. He hadn’t quite noticed Minho’s presence yet, nor had he noticed Felix’s hands reaching out to play with Jisung’s hair like he had been doing to Minho a few seconds ago.
“What the fuck happened?” Minho’s eyes darted between Jisung’s tears and Seungmin’s lost confusion.
“I- I just-” Seungmin struggled to get his sentence together, “I just stopped by the restroom, to change, and he was in there. He was just… crying in the stall and I had to beg him to open the door but he wouldn’t for so long-”
“Seungmin,” Minho interrupted him just as Seungmin had begun nervous rambling.
Obviously Seungmin didn’t know what to do, which was entirely understandable. Not that Minho knew much better, but he felt like he was capable of keeping a level head for the time being.
“Let’s get out of here for now,” Minho decided with a nod towards the exit, “We shouldn’t stay any longer than we need to.”
“Yeah,” Seungmin gave a shaky sigh, “Okay, let’s go.”
Minho lifted Felix and led the way through the crowds of people with ease. Felix had calmed in his arms and was either happily enjoying the ride through the building, or was staring at his crying boyfriend with worry as Seungmin trailed behind them.
When they made it outside, the cold air bit at his now bare arms. Goosebumps formed all over his skin, but he forced himself to push the cold to the back of his mind. The cold would disappear soon enough anyways.
“I parked over here,” Minho announced once he caught sight of his car.
Seungmin didn’t respond, other than the loud huffs of exertion from hauling one of his boyfriends around. Minho could relate, carrying Felix in his arms for so long had started to make them ache.
“Here we go,” Minho said as he made it to the car.
Seungmin was only a few feet behind him, and once both had stopped in front of the vehicle, Minho could hear his labored breathing even more clearly.
“You okay?” Minho scanned Seungmin, even though he was definitely the last person Minho needed to worry about right now with two instantly intoxicated boys in their hands.
“Yeah,” Seungmin insisted with a breathy tone.
Minho nodded, accepting the response for now, before turning his attention to Jisung who had calmed his sobs into quiet hiccups. He still looked like a mess, and he seemed to hardly be paying attention to them. Did he even realize they were outside?
“Let’s get them in?”
Minho shook his head back to Seungmin as he processed what he said. His face flushed as he realized he hadn't even unlocked the car yet. He muttered back an apology, hoping his red face wasn’t as noticeable as he thought it might be. At the very least, it warmed him up a little.
He unlocked the car and placed Felix in the back seat. He didn’t complain about the separation like he had earlier, which Minho saw as both a relief and a bitter end to the moment he’d shared with the other. The warmth left his arms, leaving only an ache he tried to stretch out small indents from where Felix’s jeans had pressed into his skin.
Seungmin put Jisung in next to Felix, and unsurprisingly Felix immediately wrapped his body around Jisung. Seungmin tried his best to secure seat belts around them, but he only managed to get their legs buckled into the seat with the chest strap awkwardly tucked behind them.
“That’s gonna have to do,” Seungmin huffed as he pulled back, but his facial expression smoothed out as Jisung and Felix cuddled closer to each other.
With Jisung’s cries having dwindled down to sniffles, Minho felt a little better about leaving the boy in Felix’s hands. He’s learned first hand that Felix’s attention would 100% be on whoever he was clinging to, which meant Felix would be the best person to console him if he got worked up again.
He wished he could stay in the back seat with them, just to make sure they were okay. He wanted to make sure Jisung wasn’t hurt, to let him know he was loved and cherished and that whatever had made him cry wouldn’t hurt him anymore. He wanted to sit Felix on his lap and pull Jisung into his side. He wanted to tangle his legs with Seungmin’s and tell him he had done a good job, that he was a good boyfriend.
But he needed to drive them home. There wasn’t enough room in the back seat for one more person, let alone two, with how sprawled out the two drunken boys were. And Minho didn’t get to be like that with them. He wasn’t dating them, he was just their close friend. The same close friend that had been bailing on them far too much lately.
“I’ll drive you home,” Minho forced out as he forced his gaze away from the back seat, “You should sit up front.”
Seungmin did as he was told and joined Minho up front. As Minho started the car, the clock lit up above his muted stereo. He had only spent much time in the club, but somehow it felt like he had been in there for hours.
“You can put something on,” Minho offered Seungmin the aux cord that hung over the middle console as he put the car in reverse.
While Minho backed out of the parking space, Seungmin did as Minho had suggested. He hadn’t even had his phone plugged in for longer than a few seconds before a soft tune was playing in the car. The shuffling in the backseat died down as the music filled the empty silence, and as Minho slowly drove down the dimly lit streets he was careful to avoid any cracks or potholes. Their apartment wasn’t that far from the club, so Minho didn’t have to drive long to get there, yet somehow by the time he was parking in the visitors parking just outside their building, Seungmin was telling him both Felix and Jisung had fallen asleep.
“Can’t say I’m too surprised,” Minho was careful as he unbuckled himself so it didn’t make too much noise, “I’m sure all that crying tired out Sungie.”
“Yeah…” Seungmin was staring at Jisung, who looked so much calmer in his sleep.
It’s not that Minho hadn’t seen Jisung cry before, he was one of his best friends. He’d seen all of them in some pretty compromising situations. But each time Jisung cried, he knew why. He was witness to whatever had worked him up, or at the very least was just a phone call or text away. But now Minho had no idea what had happened. He’d never seen Jisung drunk like this , and not knowing what had caused this was eating him up.
“Do you know what happened?”
Seungmin tensed next to him, but didn’t say anything, which only made Minho panic inside. Seungmin was avoiding Minho’s eyes, biting his lip as his gaze went everywhere except on the only other conscious person in the car.
The way Seungmin was acting frightened him, because he was acting almost like he didn’t want to tell Minho. Like he knew exactly what happened but couldn’t bring himself to say it, and that scared him more than not knowing. Because if it was bad enough that Seungmin didn’t want to tell him then…
What the hell had happened?
“What’s wrong?” Minho tried to ask calmly, but his voice came out almost as scared as he felt.
“Uh,” The other coughed lightly as he brought a hand up to rub at his nub, “I kind of know what happened.”
“Okay…” Minho nodded along, “I can tell you don’t wanna tell me.”
“It’s just-” Seungmin cut himself off with a sigh, dropping his head to his chest, “It’s complicated.”
“Just tell me this, do I need to call the police?”
“What?” Seungmin’s head shot back up, locking frantic eyes with Minho’s concerned ones, “No- what? Why would you call the police?”
“I don’t know!” Minho’s voice rose in defense, but more out of relief that Seungmin didn’t think he needed to reach out to authorities, “It just seemed bad, and he was drunk and crying in a nightclub bathroom, something bad could have happened!”
“No,” Seungmin exhaled with a shaky breath, “I promise. It’s nothing like that. It’s just something personal that we’ve been dealing with. Like, between the three of us.”
“Oh,” Minho suddenly felt a load of weight lift off his chest. He would much rather prefer relationship issues over something serious happening to one of them.
“Yeah,” Seungmin sunk back into his seat as he stared at the blank concrete wall in front of them.
Minho joined him. The car was still on with Felix and Jisung lightly snoring in the back seat. He kept the heat on, but turned the stereo volume down now that there was no music playing. The two boys sat together in a comfortable silence, recollecting themselves and thinking over everything that had transpired.
“So what were you doing today?” Seungmin asked, “You’ve been pretty busy lately.”
“Oh, uh,” Minho struggled to think of something that wasn’t the truth, because the truth was the last thing he needed to admit to right now, “Just some stuff for work.”
Minho hummed back as he lightly tapped his fingers against his leg.
“How are the cats?”
“Good,” Minho grinned, “They’re always good. I love them.”
Minho could see, out of the corner of his eye, that Seungmin wanted to ask something else. He was opening and closing his mouth but in the end kept asking all the questions he didn't really want to ask right now. Minho stayed patient, looking straight ahead to give Seungmin time to figure out what he really wanted to say.
“Are you… Have you been, uh, seeing anyone lately?”
Ah , so that was it.
“No,” Minho shook his head.
“Oh,” Seungmin was fidgeting with his hands in his lap, and it took everything in Minho’s willpower to not reach over and hold them, “We were just wondering because you always seem to have plans.”
Plans. Yeah, plans with his couch. Looking back, Minho had been avoiding them more often lately because he was scared. Scared of his feelings, scared of their reactions if they found out, scared of rejection. Had he been avoiding them so often because he didn’t want to hurt them, or because he didn’t want to hurt himself ?
“Nope,” Minho cleared his throat, “No, I’m still as single as ever.”
“Is there… anyone you’re interested in?”
Minho turned to face Seungmin who was already slowly looking his way. He looked nervous, and Minho could understand why, because he was also nervous.
“Why are you asking me these questions?”
“Um,” Minho could hear the uncertainty in his voice, “It’s just something we were talking about lately…”
“You guys were talking about my relationship status?”
“Kind of?” Seungmin squeezed his hands into fists and released them, over and over again as he spoke, “We were wondering about you. Like, how you felt about relationships and whether you were looking for one. Because, uh…” Seungmin wasn’t looking at him again, instead staring at his own hands as he tried to say whatever he wanted to.
And Minho, was an absolute nervous wreck. His heart was pounding, begging for this conversation to be going where he wanted it to go. But he forced himself to stay still, letting Seungmin guide them along.
“Okay, I’m just gonna be honest. You can hate me later if it comes down to it,” Seungmin patted his hands on his lap, waving them in the air to clear away whatever emotions were lingering around him. He composed himself with Minho watching carefully, then looked at Minho with complete seriousness.
“We like you, Minho. We have for a long time .”
Minho’s entire world froze in that moment.
His breath hitched. His fingers were freezing but his cheeks were burning. His mouth hung open with wide eyes that began stinging with tears as soon as the words had passed Seungmin’s lips. Seungmin was becoming increasingly more anxious the longer Minho didn’t respond, and Minho wished he could reassure him but his mind couldn’t seem to process what the fuck had just happened.
“I- I thought- Aren’t you guys like, exclusive?”
“Kind of?” Seungmin shrugged, “We were closed off from literally everyone except you, that was a mutual agreement between us. We all knew we wanted you. We were trying to flirt with you for a while… did you not notice?”
“You were flirting with me?” Minho felt like an absolute imbecile , “When?”
“When we decided to become a closed relationship we stopped accepting anyone elses advances. We tried to scope out how you felt, because you were the only person we wanted to pursue, but you kept denying us. You were always busy, you stopped talking to us as often… It seemed like every advance we made just made you uncomfortable.”
“But, that wasn’t because I didn’t like you,” God why was Minho such an idiot, “I was fucking stupid , god damn it. Seungmin, I love you guys.”
“What?” Seungmin had barely spoken before Minho was rambling out all of his feelings.
“I’m in love with you three. I have been for so damn long but I thought I had no chance. And when you guys were so sweet to me, it hurt because I thought it wasn’t real.” He blinked furiously, swallowing down the glowing thread of hope that started to come alive inside him.
“I haven’t been busy with work,” Minho admitted as his own tears finally fell, “I’ve been hiding because I can’t control my feelings. I’ve been trying to make them go away because I couldn't keep pretending I was fine when I wasn’t.”
Seungmin’s fingers gently rubbed under his eyes, wiping away the tears right as they were pooling over.
“I’m sorry,” Seungmin whispered, “We should have been honest from the start instead of dancing around you.”
“Don’t apologize,” Minho shook his head with a sniffle, “Please. I was the coward who hid from you guys.”
“No,” Seungmin halted Minho’s movements, holding his head in place as he made direct eye contact with him. Seungmin looked so soft , so loving and calm and everything Minho saw when he looked at Felix and Jisung. Except this time it was directed at Minho, “You’re not a coward. This isn’t your fault. Please understand that, this isn’t your fault.”
“Please,” Seungmin begged, “Don’t blame yourself.”
Minho wanted to argue back, to tell him it really was his fault. If he had just tried to talk to them to begin with then they could have avoided this whole mess. Jisung and Felix wouldn’t be in the back seat passed out drunk, Seungmin wouldn’t have struggled to finally tell him how they felt, and Minho wouldn’t have suffered in silence for so long.
But in that moment, Minho let himself do as Seungmin said. He relaxed against the driver’s seat, fully succumbing to the unstoppable tears, but this time they were out of happiness. And he let Seungmin calm him down. And hold his hand.
After today, everything was going to be different, in a good way.
I’m The Best Boyfriend
Sungie: where are youuuuuu
Like 5 minutes away
Lixie: absolutely not
Lixie: it’s the best day of our lives and you want us to chill?
It’s only a six month anniversary?
Minnie: They take their anniversaries seriously
Minnie: They’re vibrating on the couch it’s kind of funny
Minnie: Nevermind they threw a pillow at me
Don’t throw pillows at Seungmin
Sungie: don’t tell me what to DO
I can go home
Lixie: you can only use that threat for another month
Lixie: soon your home is gonna be HERE
Lixie: better think of a better way to make him behave
Minnie: You’re part of the problem too?
I’m hiding the coffee machine
Sungie: DON’T YOU DARE
Then QUIT throwing pillows at Seungmin
And Felix I’m taking your switch
Lixie has changed the chat name to Minho Is The Worst Boyfriend
Sungie: i like it
Lixie: me too
Min has changed the chat name to JiLix are on Thin Fucking Ice
Sungie: JUST GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE
AND I’LL STOP BEING A MENACE
THE LONGER YOU MESSAGE ME THE
LONGER IT TAKES ME TO GET THERE
Ten minutes later (Because his phone wouldn’t stop going off) Minho arrived at his boyfriends’ apartment.
The apartment that was soon to be his new home.
He dressed slightly nicer than usual, with a simple black button up rolled to his forearms because he knew Felix liked it that way, and the new shoes Seungmin got him. He was sporting a new eyebrow piercing courtesy of Jisung convincing him into getting matching once a few weeks ago, and his hair had been done with hair spray today.
He knew they would like it.
He hadn’t even had to pull out his keys, because by the time he could spot the apartment door, Felix was shooting out. Minho had been prepared, because this always happened, and caught Felix before the boy could trample him to the floor.
“Don’t take my switch!”
Minho laughed as he pressed a kiss to Felix’s forehead, “I love you too.”
Minho easily carried them both inside, where Jisung was guarding the coffee machine in the kitchen and Seungmin was watching them from the bar stool.
“You will take this coffee machine over my dead body.”
“I’m not gonna take your precious coffee,” Minho chuckled as he put Felix down on the tile, then threw a smirk over his shoulder, “Yet.”
They playfully bickered for a bit, throwing fake insults at each other that they all knew meant nothing. After six months, Minho had slotted into their relationship seamlessly. It was hardly a difficult transition from friendship to romantic partners, because they melded together so well right from the beginning.
All within the first week of dating, Minho learned what it felt like to be loved. He learned how it felt to sleep with someone on each side of him. He learned how to share a bathroom with three other people, and cook a meal together. He was so grateful he had these three people with him, that he had that talk with Seungmin that one night, because now he was here with them six months later.
And he was as happy as could be.
“Hey,” Seungmin said once everyone had calmed down, and they all were seated on the couch, “Happy six months.”
“Yeah! Six months!” Felix exclaimed as he tossed himself on Minho’s lap.
“Best six months of my life,” Jisung added as he kissed Minho, directly on the lips.
Yeah, he could agree.
Best six months of his life.