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The One Where She is in the Tornado

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Being inside a tornado was much more interesting than she had thought it would be. She felt like she had been inside it forever, or maybe five minutes. In any case, it was much longer than she ever imagined it would take to be picked up and then spit out by a tornado. (Not that she often thought about what it would be like. In fact, she was positive that she had never previously thought about it.) But here she was. She hadn’t even had warning that it was about to happen. Now that she considered this, she realized it was kind of surprising. The skies had been blue. The weather forecast had been clear. There had been no indication that this was going to happen.


Well then, she might as well explore this a little bit then. None of this seemed to be normal, so what could she learn from this abnormality? If she did a sort of breaststroke like motion, she could move around in the wind funnel. And now that she was moving, she realized that the wind didn’t seem that bad. Sure, it was blowing around her hair some, but not like the gusts she would be expecting. Interesting. So maybe there was some sort of anti-gravity aspect going on with this…weather phenomenon. Yes. That sounds like a good way to describe it. She wasn’t sure she could really call it a tornado anymore. She wished she had literally any of her data gathering devices with her. She suddenly understood why Jane always seemed to have one of them in her pocket, occasionally even when she was asleep.

Looking around, there wasn’t a whole lot of debris. In fact, it seemed that the storm was deciding what it did and did not pick up. She wondered if it had sentience. A full cup of coffee drifted by, and she reached out for it. It was still warm; not a drop spilled. Well then. She took a sip. It was even made to her preference. She wasn’t sure what to do with that. She decided to think hard about a danish. She had been craving a cream cheese danish for two days. It only took a minute or two before a danish was floating by her.

“I guess that solves that,” she said to no one because there was no one else in this space with her.

Maybe she should see about changing that. She thought hard about how it might be nice to meet a guy that was tall and kind and also had his own interests, but was interested in knowing more about his partner. She imagined him to be single but looking. She imagined that he had nothing shady in his past. She imagined that he wasn’t more than five years younger than her and more than fifteen older than her. And, since this seemed to be some sort of wish granting weather anomaly, she also added that he would be interested in a woman like her: one that was loud and brash and took no shit. A woman aware of her own worth, but also one that wanted someone to care about her and care for her when the time was right.

She thought that maybe this was enough for the storm to work with. It should get to make some of its own choices too. Some of it should be a surprise. 

She felt the collision before her mind registered that she was tumbling ass over teakettle with the added weight of another person.

“Oof,” he said with a bit of a groan, his limbs tangled in hers.

“You okay?” she asked as they came to a “stop” (though she wasn’t sure if it was really a stop when they were still sort of floating around. The just no longer were tumbling).

“I think so?” he said, pulling his arms from hers and gently touching himself. “Yeah, mostly just a hurt pride and maybe a bruise or two.” He stopped and looked up at her. “Are you okay?”

“I am,” she said. “And if you just sort of move your leg there,” she said, trying to carefully untangle from him, “I think we’ll be separate.” 

He followed her directions, and she absently realized that she had lost her coffee and danish. Well, small potatoes if she had gained the other thing she had been thinking about.

“Are we…are we in a tornado?” he asked, looking around.

“I’ve decided to call it a weather phenomenon because it doesn’t seem to be behaving like a tornado, though it does seem to be a spiral of wind.”

“There’s a lack of debris” he said, looking around a bit for himself.

“And, while I don’t know if it works for you too, I found that if I concentrated on something I wanted, it seems to appear.”

“It what?”

“Watch,” she said, thinking, again, about the cheese danish she wanted. It flew by her and she snagged it out of the air. “See? I wanted a cheese danish and one appeared. Try it.”

He looked skeptical, but a minute later he was grabbing a banana out of the air.

She raised her eyebrows as if to say, “See?”

“This is incredible. I have no idea, though, what caused it.”

Darcy shrugged. “I don’t know how it appeared, what caused it, or why it picked up me, but I have a feeling I’m to blame for you ending up here.”

His face scrunched up a bit in thought. “How?” he asked. “You don’t know me.”

She blushed a bit, but laid it out. “I might have asked it for a guy that met a list of specifications and then you were here.”

“Well, do I match the specifications?” She didn’t hear any judgement in his question.

“Err, I guess I don’t totally know. A lot of what I asked for was character traits or personal preferences, though, I guess one easy one is whether or not you’re single.”

“I..I am,” he stammered. “Was that something you asked for?”

“It was,” she admitted.

“Are…are you single?” he asked.

“I am,” she said. “And you asking that means you might very well fit another one of my requests.” She cleared her throat, a little embarrassed. “I was hoping for someone that might be interested in dating someone like me.”

He thought about this for a moment, and suddenly he was pulling some flowers out of the air and holding them out to her. “Well, since it seems like we’re here until some unknown conditions are met and the storm releases us, how about a date?”

She took the flowers from him. “I would like that a lot, actually.” She thought carefully, and a small bistro table and chairs appeared. “Shall we get started?” she asked with a smile.

“Absolutely,” he said, his own smile matching hers.