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I Can't Stop Loving You

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Rosé swears she can literally feel her heart breaking in half when she sees Denali talking to Megan. She’s not close enough to hear what they’re saying, but she is close enough to see the look on Megan’s face, to see that Denali’s ex is clearly still in love with her.

Rosé always knew it was a risk getting involved with Denali when she did, when Denali had only recently broken up with Megan. But it seemed worth it because of how much she’d liked the other woman, how much she loves her now. But now she knows that Jan and Lagoona were right, and that she made a huge mistake. Because she’s the one standing here with a broken heart while Megan takes Denali’s hand and leans closer to her mouth.

Rosé leaves quickly, before she has a chance to see anything else and before Denali or Megan have a chance to see her there. She doesn’t need their pity right now. She just needs to get the fuck out of there.

She heads to her apartment and breaks down the second she gets through the door and sees Jan and Lagoona’s faces.

“What’s wrong?” Jan asks soothingly, leading Rosé to the couch and handing her a box of tissues.

“Who do I need to fuck up?” Lagoona asks, sitting down next to her.

It’s a few minutes before Rosé catches her breath and can say anything. And when she does, all she can get out is Denali’s name before she’s sobbing again.

“God dammit!” Lagoona yells. “What the fuck did she do?”

It takes a while, but Rosé finally gets it all out, telling her roommates how she’s seen Denali with Megan, how she took off because she couldn’t bear to see them kissing. And how she hates herself the most because she knows that she’ll forgive Denali in an instant if she just asks her to.

“Well, we’re not going to let that happen,” Jan assures her, wrapping her arms around her in a tight, comforting hug. “We’re here for you, whatever you need.”

“Absolutely,” Lagonna agrees. “And I will beat her ass if you want me to.” She wraps her arms around Rosé too, and Rosé cries in their arms until she can’t cry anymore.

Later that night, as they’re watching Heathers and eating directly out of the tub of ice cream, there’s a knock on the door.

Jan gets up to see who it is, and it’s probably a good thing that she’s answering it, because Denali’s standing on the other side of the door. Rosé isn’t sure if Lagoona would try to hit her or not if she were the one to open it. And Rosé doesn’t want to see her. At least that’s what she tries to tell herself.

But when she hears Denali pleading with Jan, sounding confused and almost as hurt as Rosé feels, she gives up trying to pretend.

“Let her in Jan!” Rosé calls out to her roommate. “Just let me see her one last time. Please.” Jan looks over her shoulder at Rosé, who nods at her, and Jan steps to the side, letting Denali into the apartment.

“Rosie,’ Denali whispers when she’s standing in front of her by the couch. Rosé looks up and makes eye contact, and she wants to just forget all about it and let Denali hug her and make it all better.

But before she can say or do anything, Lagoona starts talking instead.

“You’ve got a lot of fucking nerve showing up here right now,” she bites out, glaring daggers at Denali.

“What are you talking about? Rosé, what’s going on?” she asks, sounding so sincere, but then Rosé has a flashback of what she’d seen earlier, and she gets angry and sad all over again.

“Don’t pretend like you don’t know,” Rosé says, finally finding her voice.

“I’m not pretending anything,” Denali insists. “I’ve been trying to text you all day and you haven’t answered. I’ve been so worried that something happened to you. Rosie, are you alright?”

Rosé laughs humorlessly, in complete disbelief that Denali would ask her that question.

“Of course I’m not alright!” she blurts out. “I saw you with Megan,” she finishes more quietly, trying with all her might to not start crying again, to not give Denali that satisfaction.

“Oh,” Denali says, deflating a bit. “Rosie, baby. I know this sounds like such a line, but I swear to you, it’s not what it looked like.”

Rosé snorts. Like she’s going to believe that.

“Can we please talk about this? Alone?” she asks, flicking her eyes between Jan and Lagoona and back to Rosé.

“Absolutely not!” Lagoona yells, Jan nodding along with her, but Rosé just wants to get this over with.

“It’s fine, guys. I’ll be fine,” she tells them, urging herself to believe the words as well. After some intense nonverbal communication, they finally leave the two of them alone, and Denali takes a seat next to Rosé on the couch.

“Well?” Rosé asks, prompting Denali to explain when she’s been silent for too long.

“I was with Megan,” she starts. “But definitely not for whatever reason you thought.”

“I don’t know what else I could think when she kissed you,” Rosé interrupts.

“She didn’t kiss me!” Denali protests before dropping her voice lower and continuing. “She tried to, but I pushed her away before she could. She’s been texting me a lot lately, and calling, and messaging me on social media. She wanted to get back together. But Rosé, I swear I said no every single time. I don’t want to be with her. I want to be with you. I love you so much.” Her voice breaks on the last word and she looks close to tears.

Rosé feels her heart clench in her chest, wanting so badly to believe what Denali’s telling her, wanting to say it’s all okay and let Denali kiss it better.

“I don’t know if I believe you,” Rosé says, barely above a whisper, and she doesn’t miss the look of anguish that flashes across Denali’s face.

“I only met with her in person because I wanted to make sure she got the message that we’re done and over with, forever.”

“It doesn’t seem like she got that message if she still tried to kiss you.”

“You’re right.” Denali nods. “But I think she got it after I showed her this.” She fishes something out of her purse and Rosé gasps when she sees what it is. In her hand, Denali is holding a small, black velvet box, and when she opens it she sees the most beautiful diamond ring she’s ever seen in her life.

“I know it’s way too soon, and this is obviously not the way I planned on doing this, but I think she finally realized it when she saw the ring I was planning on using to propose to you.”

Rosé is speechless as one hundred and one different emotions swirl around inside of her head.

“Denali,” is all she can say once she finally finds her voice again.

“Rosé, I love you so much. I won’t hurt you. I promise. And I’ll never let anyone else hurt you either. You don’t have to say anything now - I know how confused you must be, how hurt you must’ve been seeing what you thought you saw - but I do want to marry you and spend the rest of my life with you.”

Rosé can’t believe how her day has gone, how she was at her lowest low just a few hours ago, and now she feels like she’s on top of the world with happiness. She knows they still have a lot of things to talk about, but if she’s being honest with herself, there’s just one thing she wants to say right now.

So she says it.

“Yes.”

“What?” Denali gasps.

“Yes! I want to marry you, too. I love you too, Denali, more than I’ve ever loved anyone in my entire life. It scares the shit out of me sometimes how much you make me feel, but I know what I want Denali, and it’s you.”

The smile on Denali’s face and the way her dimples cut into her cheeks make Rosé feel at ease all of a sudden, make her think she’s definitely making the right choice.

“I love you,” Denali says again before taking the ring out of the box and sliding it onto Rosé’s finger, and she leans forward to cup her cheeks and kiss her fiercely.

Rosé doesn’t know how she could’ve ever doubted Denali, can feel how much she loves her in their embrace, and she’s so excited to spend the rest of her life with her.

She’s less excited about the prospect of explaining everything to her roommates after earlier. But the sob she hears coming from the other room tells her that they already know.