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You Think Of Me, Too

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Beth was breaking open the spine of her new journal when Maggie walked passed her cell, calling with a light ruffle of her curtain that the hot water wasn’t going to last. Usually, Beth showered in the mornings, before most people were awake and before the others were dirty enough to want one. Showering nowadays was a luxury, and she didn’t take it for granted that they had hot, running water, and she knew that this couldn’t last long – it wouldn’t – so she was taking her privileges now, knowing eventually they had to run out.

She snapped her journal shut, letting her eyes linger over it a moment as it fell against her lumpy pillow. She was too tired to even begin to put words onto the page and yet she felt a nagging feeling that she did want to write for once, not just out of habit and not just to distract herself. She hadn’t asked for the new journal and that was the start of all her problems. Because when Rick and Michonne had come back from their run that day, shouldering bags full of much needed food and medicine, Daryl had hung back behind them, catching her eye and making his way over. A relief washed through Beth at the sight of him, and it wasn’t just because she always half-expected him to never come back, but because she’d found in the last few weeks, she genuinely started to like him. Like, like him like him. And that was a problem she was desperately trying to ignore, but between his bulging biceps always glistening with sweat under the hot Georgia sun and the grit in his voice when he muttered good mornings to her, she wasn’t doing a good job. And then he’d gone and come back from that run and held out his hand and Beth’s fingers were closing around the leather-bound notebook and she felt her heart fall a little further, her stomach plunge a little deeper.

‘Ain’t gotta stand there gawkin’, just take the damn book, Greene.’ Daryl had said after a moment, watching her with a raised brow.

Beth closed her mouth and hastily swiped the book from his hands. Now it was Daryl’s turn for uncertainty as he shifted uncomfortably under her surprised gaze.

‘Know you said the other day you filled your last one up, so –’

‘Daryl – I – thankyou.’ Beth had breathed, feeling a smile warm her face as Daryl’s eyes flickered to her lips, staring a little too long. She didn’t think he’d even heard her when she’d told him while trying to wrestle a bottle into Judy’s mouth that she wished she had a new journal. He was on his perch skinning a deer, bloodied knives all around him and a look of silent concentration that told most people he didn’t want to be bothered, but he never seemed to be mad at Beth when she talked to him. Most of the time he encouraged it in fact, and that had been one of the first things to make Beth wonder at him, at why on earth he allowed her to talk and bother him when she knew as well as he did that he never let anyone else do the same.

‘Ain’t gotta look at me like I’m fuckin’ Santa Clause.’ Daryl muttered, dragging his eyes away, but Beth knew there was no real heat to his words. They had a comfortable back and forth, where Daryl would pretend to be as much of an asshole to her as he was everyone else, and Beth would pretend she didn’t notice that he wasn’t.

She shoved him lightly as they walked back to the cell block, an exasperated laugh escaping her lips. She’d said something else then, and he’d rumbled something back, but she couldn’t concentrate on anything except the warm leather in her hands, giving life to new words and giving new hope to the flutters he gave her.

Now, Beth dragged her eyes away from the journal and grabbed a few clean clothes from under her bed, grateful that they’d lived long enough at the prison to implement a proper laundry system. The cell block was silent as she padded out of her room on bare feet, peering around and taking a silent check of everyone, making sure they were where they were meant to be; her father asleep upstairs judging from the light snoring, Carl and Judith tucked away in the cell next door, Maggie and Glenn tangled up together panting a few rooms away. Rick was on watch tonight and she knew Michonne had taken to keeping him company in the guard tower. The thought of their relationship and what it was turning into took Beth all the way to the showers, hearing running water and cursing Maggie for being so eager to get back to Glenn that she’d left the tap running. The shower in the far corner was one of the only ones that still worked so she quickly stripped off her jeans and t-shirt, ready to be in and out as quick as she could to make up for the wasted water. Beth was just rounding the corner when she heard it – a soft moan, followed by a choked “fuck”, and before she could even blindly reach for the knife in her discarded jeans she was staring at a very naked Daryl Dixon, bent under the steaming water with a hand splayed out on the tiled wall, the other working up and down his hard cock.

She must have made a noise of surprise because Daryl jumped and turned immediately, and Beth caught the angry flash in his eyes mixed with arousal and the tip of his red dick swinging around with him before she’d hastily turned, covering her eyes unnecessarily. He knew as well as she did that she’d seen enough.

‘Fuckin’ Christ, Beth – what the fuck are you doin’ here –’

‘I wanted to take a shower!’ Beth protested weakly, heart hammering as her mind caught up to the situation at hand. Daryl. Daryl Dixon getting himself off in the showers. Daryl Dixon angry and horny and standing five feet from her with his cock out.

‘You didn’t fuckin’ think there might be someone in here already, what with the water runnin’ and all?’

Beth sputtered, finally pulling her hands away from her eyes and determinedly looking at the ceiling with her back still to him, suddenly painfully aware that she was half naked. She cursed her traitorous body for the shiver that ran through it at the thought of Daryl seeing her like this.

‘I thought Maggie left it on – she told me to go!’

There was a noise like Daryl had swiped a towel off a rack, and then he was saying in a rough voice, ‘since when the fuck do you shower at night? God, your dad’s gonna have my balls when he hears –’

‘What are you talking about?’ Beth demanded, finally spinning around and forcing herself to hold Daryl’s blazing stare, forgetting the fact that she was only in her bra and underwear. ‘I’m not gonna tell him and I’m pretty sure you won’t either.’

Daryl glared at her, chest rising and falling rapidly like an animal caught in a trap. She willed her gaze not to fall lower, to where the lump of his dick was stark against the white fabric. The shower was still on and Beth was glad that it was drowning out their voices, the last thing she needed someone to come in and see them both practically naked almost yelling at each other.

‘I – I’m sorry, okay? I didn’t see anything –’

Daryl snorted like he didn’t believe her.

‘You can finish, I’ll go –’

‘Ain’t no way I’m fuckin’ finishin’ now –’

‘Everyone does it,’ Beth babbled in a desperate attempt to lessen the tension, hardly aware of what she was saying, ‘I do all the time.’

Daryl froze, hand tight on the towel around his waist. ‘What?’

Beth felt her heart jump up into her mouth but she knew there was no way out of this. There was something on his face now, something in the way his pupils were blown wide and his tongue was working the inside of his cheek that made her keep going. ‘I, um . . . I do it here, too. I mean, usually there’s no one around and the water feels nice –’

‘Jesus fuck girl, you don’t gotta be tellin’ me that shit.’

Beth raised a brow, crossing her arms over her exposed chest and shifting her weight onto one leg. Now that the initial shock of the situation had worn off, she was able to notice little things she hadn’t before – like the way Daryl’s jaw jumped as his eyes raked over her body, the way his cock was still straining hard against its restraints, the way he did not sound so much angry as scared.

‘Why not?’

Daryl shook his head at her, running a hand through his wet hair, pulling it off his face. ‘You got any idea what you’re fuckin’ doin’ to me right now?’

His meaning seemed to take a moment to reach Beth, and then she was raising both eyebrows and her mouth was falling open in dull realisation as she finally allowed her gaze to fall onto his cock. There was a loud silence, louder than the shower, louder than the things that they weren’t saying. Beth swallowed hard, feeling her stomach drop as she tried to still the furious beating of her heart. Because the way Daryl was looking at her right now did not make her think he wanted her to leave.

‘What, me? I’m doing that?’

Daryl’s eyes flashed at her and his voice was almost a beg. ‘Christ, girl –’

‘You do it for me.’ She stammered out, hoping he didn’t see the red flush creeping up her neck.

‘I – what?’ Daryl was staring at her like she’d spoken another language. Maybe she had.

‘When I’m getting myself off.’ She shrugged, wondering detachedly what the hell had gotten into her, confessing this to him. She’d never seen Daryl like this before, angry and turned on all at once. It should have been a deterrent, but god, she was sick of wanting him from a distance, and god, did she want to see where this went. ‘I think of you.’

‘The hell you want me to say to that? That I jack off thinkin' of you?’

‘Only if it’s true.’ Beth replied and Daryl’s angry scowl was as good as a confession. She couldn’t breathe – she couldn’t think – Daryl thought of her when he was touching himself. So many nights she’d fallen asleep to the thought of him, so many times she’d pushed herself to release under the very same shower head, imagining his growls in her ear and his rough hands all over her, and he’d been doing the exact same thing.

Daryl was silent for the longest time, chest swelling with every deep breath and eyes darting between hers. Then, as though she was controlled by someone with a few buttons and a vicious will to see her make a fool of herself, she stepped forward and closed the gap between them.

The hot water splashed onto her face, the steam gathering around the room and fogging up mirrors now. She could feel Daryl’s warm breath along her cheekbones, thought that if they were any closer they would be kissing. He was so still she thought maybe he was having a heart attack, but then he mumbled, ‘the fuck are you doin’?’

Beth held his stare, eyes darting to his lips as she ran her tongue along hers. ‘I want you to fuck me, Daryl. Want this so bad, and I think you do, too.’

She could hardly believe the words were coming out of her mouth but then Daryl was moving, finally, and he’d dropped the towel from his waist and let his hard cock spring free and it grazed against her bare thigh and she shuddered with longing, feeling the damp spot between her thighs grow slick.

‘You wanna be fucked?’

Beth grinned, her mouth dry with anticipation at the edge to Daryl’s voice, at how he was looking at her now. She nodded, and that seemed to be all he was waiting for because he snaked a hand around her waist and pulled her into the stream of water with him, lips closing over hers.

Beth immediately melted into his heat and kissed him back with fervour, parting her lips to allow his tongue to run along hers and feeling like someone had grabbed her gut and twisted. His rough hands had already unhooked her bra and thrown it aside, breaking their kiss to reach down and take one of her breasts in his mouth.

Beth moaned at the sudden sensation, his teeth grazing her nipples before he bit down, a little harder than she’d been prepared for but hard enough that she felt her pussy quiver. She wasted no time running her hands down his rippling arms before closing around the base of his cock, tugging him experimentally a few times and grinning into his mouth when he brought his lips to hers again and groaned. With a quick movement, he had her pinned against the cold tiles, body fitting into every curve of hers, cock pressing needily into her hipbone.

Beth gasped as his fingers found her pussy, collecting some of the wet dribble coming out of her lips before moving to her clit and massaging her in circles. The heat of his kisses were almost unbearable but now with his fingers playing her like a guitar she could barely hold herself up. She felt her knees give way, felt his strong grip fall onto her waist and hold her up, his body doing the rest.

‘You like that?’ He teased roughly, smirking against her lips and Beth bit his lip in response, and she only felt his grin grow wider.

‘You’re fuckin’ trouble, Greene.’

‘You gonna fuck me or what, Dixon?’ Beth panted impatiently against him and Daryl growled, shoving two fingers through her sopping opening and smacking a hand over her mouth when she cried out.

‘Got a filthy fuckin’ mouth.’ He muttered into her neck, bending down to lick a stripe from her collarbone to her ear where he rasped, ‘that how you want it, hm? Hard and fast?’

Beth nodded, moaning against his hand as he pumped his fingers inside her, hooking one leg around his waist and pulling him impossibly close.

‘You gonna stay quiet?’ He breathed into her ear, trailing butterfly-like kisses until he reached her earlobe and sucked. Beth writhed against him, feeling that they’d be lucky if she could even keep her breathing at a reasonable volume but nodded needily.

‘Good girl.’

With a grunt, Daryl slapped a hand against her ass and squeezed her hard before lifting her up. She wrapped both of her legs around his waist, nearly slipping off him under the water but he steadied her, pushing her back against the cold wall right as he thrust forward and buried his cock deep inside her. Beth let out a gasp as the pressure turned to pleasure, her arms wrapping around his neck.

‘Fuck, you’re so tight.’ Daryl growled, his breaths coming out choked as he pulled out then thrust in even harder, and he wasn’t even stretching her out because he didn’t need to – she was so wet for him already that the slick between her legs was almost unbearable. His head dropped to Beth’s shoulder as he pounded into her, both hands on her ass now and dragging her body closer to his as he hit that spot inside her that made her eyes flutter closed. His strokes were messy and his balls were slapping loudly against her ass but when he found her lips again the kiss was tender, almost loving. She sucked on his bottom lip as they shared the same desperate breaths, feeling a tightening in her gut at the low grunt that came out of him.

‘D-Daryl . . . fuck, Daryl I’m gonna come –’ Beth moaned, throwing her head back and feeling her hair sticking to her breasts as they bounced up and down at Daryl’s quickened pace.

He made a choked noise in the back of his throat as he tore a hand off her ass and spat in it, moving to rub her clit messily, and the feeling of his warm saliva on her pussy was enough to push her over the edge. Beth’s heart shattered against her ribs as her brows knitted together, lips falling open and pussy tightening around his fat cock, vision full of stars. A moment later Daryl had let out a whimper, pulling out of her quickly and grinding against her clit as he came, shooting himself over her stomach. His head had collapsed against hers and he was cursing under his breath, using her name amongst the swears like it held just as much weight.

Beth’s legs were shaking and her breathing was ragged and when Daryl lifted his weight off her and the running water hit her overly stimulated clit, she shuddered. What she did to herself or had anyone else do didn’t even come close to the feeling she’d just had and she suspected now that she’d had it, she couldn’t go without it again. Daryl seemed to be thinking the same as he put her down gently, almost shy now. He was watching her through the wet hair plastered to his face as though coming to the same realisation that they could do this again, if they wanted, as many times as they wanted. He reached up and tilted the shower head towards her, washing her skin clean of his come and Beth couldn’t help the giggle that escaped her. After a second Daryl was smiling too, and then they were both laughing and it was the best she’d felt in years and she could barely believe that that had just happened. Daryl shook his head at her, smile cutting across his face and his canines poking into his bottom lip with a look that said he was happy too, and that he couldn’t believe it either.