"God Beca!" Stacie said tired of the constant back and forth. Beca and Stacie were in a weird situation, they both had feelings for one another but Beca couldn't get the past out of her head. The two would fuss and fight often over their situation.
"I'm sorry Stacie I know this is always my fault, but you have to understand where I'm coming from." Beca said as she plopped on the sofa.
Stacie sat on the table in front of her "Hey, I do ok."
Beca looked at her "It's just these memories I got, I can't get them out of my head."
Stacie sat there and nodded "I know Bec." Truth is that Chloe had really ruined Beca. The girl sitting in front of Stacie was nothing like the girl she used to know. Beca was never afraid or hesitant to get the girl she wanted. Chloe and Beca dated for 5 and a half years before Chloe suddenly broke it off claiming that she wasn't feeling the relationship. Come to find out that she left Beca the moment her career took off.
"It's just if someone can do that after almost six years than anyone can just come in my life and fuck it up even more." Beca said still looking at the taller girl.
"You know I'm not like her Bec. I've known you since middle school, almost fifteen years of friendship. I don't give a shit about your fame or status, I only care about you." Stacie said as she held Beca's hand.
Beca wished she could just get over the past and the memories that haunted her, but it proved to be harder than she ever thought. She really did love Stacie and want to be with the taller girl, but she was still afraid that history can repeat itself. She didn't and couldn't lose Stacie, not after fifteen years of being best friends.
"I know Stace I honestly do. Truth is that I want this, and I want to let you in and try, but I can't get past this. Every time I think of jumping in the memories flood back in." Beca said playing with the ring on Stacie's middle finger.
"You can't let the past keep you from moving on." Stacie said.
"Don't you think I know that. Don't you think I want to get over this shit and be happy?" Beca said getting tired of hearing people tell her that.
"I never said you didn't Beca. I'm just saying your letting this consume you. The old Beca would have moved on and shown that person that she didn't need them." Stacie replied.
"Well I'm sorry that I'm not the Beca you knew ok. Life changes people and love fucks with people." Beca said back a bit bitterly.
Stacie just sighed and took a deep breath "Listen Bec, I really don't want to fight anymore." Stacie got up has she finished speaking.
"So that's it? You're just going to walk away?" Beca asked.
Stacie looked back "Yes Beca, before this escalates again. I want this, I really do. More than anything, but I'm tired of the back and forth. I don't like arguing with you, and you know that."
Beca shook her head "Now you sound like her." Beca said quietly, but Stacie still heard it.
"Are you serious? Did you just compare me to her of all people?" Stacie asked taken back.
Beca groaned "I-" Beca stopped to take a deep breath "I didn't mean it like that Stace, I just meant she would say the same shit and look what happened."
Stacie shook her head "Get it through that thick stubborn skull of yours, I'm not like her and I never will. When you want to talk you know where to find me." Stacie said then walked towards her room closing her door and sliding down the door.
Beca threw her head back against the couch and mentally scolded herself.
"God why can't I just get this shit right. Why can't I just let the past fucking go." Beca thought to herself.
Stacie meanwhile leaned her head against the door and shut her eyes tight "Why why why can't things just go right. Why can't she see that I'm not like the others and won't do her wrong." Stacie thought to herself as a few tears spilled out. All this arguing was starting to get to Stacie, she truly did hate fighting with Beca. It would always make her sad and seeing the state her best friend and the girl she was in love with was in wasn't making things better for her.
After a few minutes of cooling down Beca got up and knocked on Stacie's door "Stace, can you open up please?" Beca asked but was met with nothing but silence.
After a few moments of silence she spoke up again "Look I'm sorry for comparing the two of you, I just want to talk now that I've cooled off. Please just open up." Beca said.
Stacie reached over her head and unlocked the door as she moved to the side.
Beca walked in and closed the door taking a seat in front of the taller girl "Hey why are you crying?" Beca asked softly wiping a few tear stains off Stacie's cheek.
"Because I'm exhausted of this Bec. I don't like fighting with you plus I just want you to be happy." Stacie said sadly looking down.
Beca lifted her head by placing her index finger under Stacie's chin "Listen, I'm sorry ok. I don't mean to take out my pain, anger and frustration out on you, but sometimes I just can't help it. It's just my heart can't take any more false hope and fake love. Ever since Chloe I just feel like there's this icebox where my heart is supposed to be, and I can't help feeling like I can't trust no one." Beca said.
"But I've never given a reason not to." Stacie said.
"I know sweetie I know. I thought she wouldn't and look where I'm at. I opened up to her and bared my heart and soul to that girl just for her to do me dirty." Beca said.
Stacie looked Beca directly in the eyes " I will never do you the same. And that's a promise." Stacie said seriously.
Beca cracked a smile "Good because I really want to work this out. I'm so tired of fighting."
Stacie chuckled "Really?"
Beca nodded "Yup, still want me the way I want you?"
Stacie nodded eagerly "Of course."
"I won't be easy to deal with." Beca said jokingly.
"When have you ever?" Stacie joked back.
Beca pulled Stacie close to her and slowly leaned in placing a soft kiss on Stacie's lips. Stacie slowly responded to the kiss and placed her hands on Beca's cheeks. After a few they broke apart resting their foreheads against one another.
"I don't want to mess this up." Beca smiled.
Stacie smiled "Same."
"Then you better keep your eye on me girl." Beca smirked.